You can get ANYTHING at Claire’s

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  • čas přidán 29. 11. 2023

Komentáře • 7K

  • @annoyed_bimbo8104
    @annoyed_bimbo8104 Před 6 měsíci +27446

    "I didnt hear assassination"
    "Those are only available at select claires with 16yr olds in charge"

    • @macandcheese4138
      @macandcheese4138 Před 5 měsíci +252

      GOLD

    • @lr2super
      @lr2super Před 5 měsíci +163

      You need to ask for the no in menu services

    • @Emi_Weebo_VT
      @Emi_Weebo_VT Před 5 měsíci +140

      Hi, I’m a 16 year old
      Lmao I actually applied for a job at claire’s. They didn’t want me 😔

    • @Zilovesmymelo
      @Zilovesmymelo Před 5 měsíci

      Hi fellow 16 year old​@@Emi_Weebo_VT

    • @benpado5571
      @benpado5571 Před 5 měsíci +19

      Y’all been Stalin since 07, lemme Czech oh they starved after y’all couldn’t take me out how shellfish

  • @Floofel.
    @Floofel. Před 7 měsíci +14169

    I like how the employee sometimes threw normal ones in there between the gruesome ones lmaoo

    • @PrettiePessimistik
      @PrettiePessimistik Před 7 měsíci +351

      I had that exact thought. The fact there are regular things all throughout made me laugh even harder!!! 😂😂😂

    • @Nai_is_Fly
      @Nai_is_Fly Před 7 měsíci +226

      I mean you gotta. Their clientele isn’t just drug dealers and traffickers🤷‍♀️

    • @veniankween130
      @veniankween130 Před 7 měsíci +154

      Right but some of the “normal” ones are still like. Dental cleanings. Ocean cleanup. Gynecology appointments. At a Claire’s. The outliers aren’t just gruesome

    • @goldenheart__
      @goldenheart__ Před 7 měsíci +104

      im used to it, this is just what fanfic tags look like

    • @Floofel.
      @Floofel. Před 7 měsíci +24

      @@goldenheart__BEST REPLY EVER DUDE

  • @Zebo12345678
    @Zebo12345678 Před 3 měsíci +1922

    The jump from "dog walking" IMMEDIATELY to "dog fighting" got me.

    • @theBestElliephant
      @theBestElliephant Před 4 dny +8

      "we cannot guarantee any dog we walk will not end up hypothetically fighting for its life. allegedly. does 2pm work for you? we'll also need complete unsupervised access to your home, thx"

    • @scoth_the_first
      @scoth_the_first Před 2 dny +5

      "oh shit, wrong dog"

    • @homebrewHousehold
      @homebrewHousehold Před 8 hodinami

      "feet pics" and "babysitting" side by side 😭

  • @ishabv89
    @ishabv89 Před 3 měsíci +1277

    The scalp massage genuinely got my attention and got me excited

    • @YW2324
      @YW2324 Před 2 měsíci +22

      That low key sounds nice ☺️

    • @sylverscale
      @sylverscale Před 19 dny +4

      ​@@YW2324If they know as much about it as try know about piercing I'll pass. 😅

    • @YW2324
      @YW2324 Před 19 dny +1

      @@sylverscale lol that's ey did a good job on my ears 👂 in 2012? Maybe their worse now

  • @DirtScraps
    @DirtScraps Před 7 měsíci +16278

    I really love how it just kept zigzagging over the spectrum of extremes instead of slowly escalating. 🤣😂🤣

    • @Quackers0_0
      @Quackers0_0 Před 7 měsíci +710

      that honestly make's it even better and more surprising,and creepy,idk why more people don't do this

    • @randolph_plays
      @randolph_plays Před 7 měsíci +529

      abortions, baking classes, hostage negotiations...

    • @timmygilbert4102
      @timmygilbert4102 Před 7 měsíci +310

      Smokey eyes was a bit too much though, that's were I drew the line 😢

    • @way.truth.life.
      @way.truth.life. Před 7 měsíci +75

      The CHAOS 😂

    • @christinehurley2487
      @christinehurley2487 Před 7 měsíci +118

      "You zig when everyone expects you to zag kid, that's how you keep them on their toes."

  • @CL0WNP4RTY
    @CL0WNP4RTY Před 7 měsíci +19618

    I love that they commit crimes but also do criminal investigations.
    Single handedly keeping cops in business, what a kind company.

    • @meganelise277
      @meganelise277 Před 7 měsíci +465

      Don’t forget the crime scene cleanup

    • @nessesaryschoolthing
      @nessesaryschoolthing Před 7 měsíci +248

      They're just like the real police, only cheaper probably

    • @TUDORMARCU16
      @TUDORMARCU16 Před 7 měsíci +101

      They also do dog walks and dog fights.

    • @legoguyhf
      @legoguyhf Před 7 měsíci +132

      "yes officer, after thorough investigation, I have concluded that the one who murdered little susie was me."

    • @abillionzebras
      @abillionzebras Před 7 měsíci +6

      ENA????

  • @kirstenspringer5401
    @kirstenspringer5401 Před 3 měsíci +551

    Getting a lobotomy at Claire’s has been a joke amongst my friends for years

  • @thescholarsjourney661
    @thescholarsjourney661 Před měsícem +125

    As someone going into forensic science, I can confirm that Claire's handles approximately 98% of U.S. criminal investigations.

  • @ellas_emporium
    @ellas_emporium Před 6 měsíci +9597

    When your local Claire’s does more for you than your local government…

  • @gellisbarber1786
    @gellisbarber1786 Před 7 měsíci +70531

    I really want to see a Claire's hostage negotiation.

    • @CatMom-uw9jl
      @CatMom-uw9jl Před 7 měsíci +4664

      “If you let the hostages go now, we’ll throw in an extra pair of these cute earrings. And a hair accessory.”
      Grizzled bank robber types: “Can we get unicorn headbands for all the guys?”
      “Of course.”
      “And Bob wants to get his ears pierced, but he wants sparkly studs.”
      “No problem.”
      “And can we get Cinnabon? Everybody’s kind of hungry.”
      “There’s a guy at Cinnabon who’s got a crush on Bethynee. Give her five minutes.”

    • @GSBarlev
      @GSBarlev Před 7 měsíci +1035

      ​@@CatMom-uw9jlI lost it at Bethynee. Well done.

    • @Fallinupintolove
      @Fallinupintolove Před 7 měsíci +510

      Most effective Negotiation ever, well done Claire's 👏🏼

    • @hollyshaw-elliemae
      @hollyshaw-elliemae Před 7 měsíci +147

      @NotVille_ you mom

    • @siunmadness5009
      @siunmadness5009 Před 7 měsíci

      ​@@CatMom-uw9jlBYTHNEE DIDJJD

  • @leconcasse6450
    @leconcasse6450 Před 2 měsíci +5

    I love how feet pics is the one she said faster, as if it was the darkest one

  • @Djsertraline
    @Djsertraline Před 3 měsíci +58

    This is my fave type of Claire's humor.

  • @Heartly_art
    @Heartly_art Před 7 měsíci +23685

    Claire’s, a place you can get what you want. Anything you want

    • @Dh-hg5ym
      @Dh-hg5ym Před 7 měsíci +170

      "Anyway you need to get it"

    • @chubbyanimalenthusiast70
      @chubbyanimalenthusiast70 Před 7 měsíci +73

      But it will come with a great price

    • @goldenalex22
      @goldenalex22 Před 7 měsíci +67

      With great power… comes, great regret-ability…. (If you get caught)

    • @demetriam2408
      @demetriam2408 Před 7 měsíci +13

      And it all has a delicious peppering of arsenic

    • @KittyGoGames
      @KittyGoGames Před 7 měsíci +10

      They have pusheen plushies... i freakin love them

  • @agentatles624
    @agentatles624 Před 7 měsíci +5591

    I went to Claire's and got a set of human lungs. I even got to pick out the person i got the lungs from! Best customer service I ever received.

    • @hannrkelley
      @hannrkelley Před 7 měsíci +200

      Special deal on vaper lungs! They don't work as good as a smoker's but they're half off!

    • @aaronmorgan9683
      @aaronmorgan9683 Před 7 měsíci +55

      I'm putting in a job application

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +55

      @@hannrkelleyThat’s a steal! I’m so getting a pair!

    • @cherrywoodapplesauce
      @cherrywoodapplesauce Před 7 měsíci +39

      Did you get the double lung piercing for 20% off? I think it's still going on until the end of the month!

    • @Poisoning_snakes
      @Poisoning_snakes Před 7 měsíci +20

      OH I NEED SOME!! I hate my lungs, I need to replace em.

  • @awesomebananas8100
    @awesomebananas8100 Před 2 měsíci +6

    The person in black was only shocked because the Claire's worker said they could do smokey eyes.

  • @beeperscreepers4263
    @beeperscreepers4263 Před 2 měsíci +24

    I love how they do criminal investigations while also committing every crime

  • @blackgirlmagicc
    @blackgirlmagicc Před 7 měsíci +23488

    Okay but why does Claire’s feel like a place you could get an abortion probably performed by a 17 year old on minimum wage

    • @christopherb501
      @christopherb501 Před 7 měsíci +898

      No matter your thoughts on abortion I think we can all agree that having untrained part-timers performs them isn't a great idea.

    • @sandraswan9008
      @sandraswan9008 Před 7 měsíci +836

      ​@@christopherb501 wow you really don't know what humor is

    • @swearimnotarobot3746
      @swearimnotarobot3746 Před 7 měsíci +434

      @@sandraswan9008I agree with them. Whether you’re for or against, you don’t want a 17 year old part timer doing it 😂

    • @Vienic2
      @Vienic2 Před 7 měsíci +351

      ⁠@@christopherb501no matter your view on abortion, I think we can all agree that getting a abortion by untrained part-timers is absolutely fine and totally won’t go wrong.

    • @CSBastianyGaumnitz
      @CSBastianyGaumnitz Před 7 měsíci +245

      Crazy thing is that it's not a 17 year old working for minimum wage. It's a 60 year old OBGYN who is picking up another job to help pay off their student loans. 😢

  • @hectorthealchemist
    @hectorthealchemist Před 7 měsíci +1990

    “Unleashing the multiverse… and smoky eyes” 😂😂👏🏽👏🏽 that cadence was everything!!

    • @Stars_to_infinity
      @Stars_to_infinity Před 7 měsíci +29

      'If u need anything, and I mean ANYTHING,' yes i would like a winning lottery ticket.

    • @That_chaotic_quadrobist
      @That_chaotic_quadrobist Před 7 měsíci +4

      ​@@Stars_to_infinityUnfortunately, that is an impossible feat and will never be obtained by a mere mortal

    • @Stars_to_infinity
      @Stars_to_infinity Před 7 měsíci

      @@That_chaotic_quadrobist true, what about time travel so I can see the winning lottery numbers though

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +5

      I think they do teleportation to other realms right?

  • @jhennylanzel
    @jhennylanzel Před 2 měsíci +5

    Claire's is literally the crack in reality that allows the possible and impossible to happen

  • @kyriahowey3322
    @kyriahowey3322 Před 3 měsíci +41

    😂 I wanna know why throwing Torot Reading in where you did was juuuuust the right touch for me to lose it 😂😂😂

  • @that_one_athena_cabin_girl
    @that_one_athena_cabin_girl Před 7 měsíci +2348

    I went to Claire's once. Spoke to my ancestors, asked them to curse someone, the employees didn't ask any questions, they were super helpful. There was a newer employee at the time but they made sure she didn't mess anything up, she and the rest of the staff was super helpful.

  • @mocca2sweet
    @mocca2sweet Před 7 měsíci +4154

    Y'all, Claire's is GREAT at crime scene cleanup. They even sprinkle some glitter free of charge. Highly recommended!

    • @monkee9878
      @monkee9878 Před 7 měsíci +77

      that's their calling card

    • @GoroAkechi_Real
      @GoroAkechi_Real Před 7 měsíci +30

      They gave me mesothelioma :(

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +15

      Ooooo I think I’ll need that tonight….

    • @spam9118
      @spam9118 Před 7 měsíci +13

      Oh is that required or can you request they don’t do it. I just finished getting this body out of here I don’t need something even harder to dispose of

    • @Stark-Raving
      @Stark-Raving Před 7 měsíci +13

      Glitter is a crime scene in and of itself

  • @hololark
    @hololark Před 3 měsíci +31

    Cicada 3301 was actually just the Claire's management application.

  • @p0_tay
    @p0_tay Před 3 měsíci +6

    I love how that list of things was a roller coaster. There was not gradual change into the criminal behavior it was just thrown in there like it was completely normal 💀

  • @Jinx-unseen
    @Jinx-unseen Před 7 měsíci +6161

    I got my appendix removed at Claire’s. They even gave me a complimentary hoodie and a 10% off all beanie babies! 10/10 would def recommend

  • @Jooyeons-strawberry-cake
    @Jooyeons-strawberry-cake Před 7 měsíci +1692

    Give the employee a raise for remembering all of that

    • @devoutmordexfollower5289
      @devoutmordexfollower5289 Před 7 měsíci +18

      Nah, she didnt even remember a fraction of the available services

    • @Itsr0zalina
      @Itsr0zalina Před 7 měsíci +9

      dude how many doctors police officers fbi agents detectives and professional cleaners does one claires need???

    • @Mx.Anonym0us
      @Mx.Anonym0us Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@Itsr0zalinaAll of them.

    • @Catra_x_Adora
      @Catra_x_Adora Před 7 měsíci +1

      That's not even a fraction of the amount of services they provide

  • @cryptid6279
    @cryptid6279 Před 2 měsíci +14

    as someone who used to work and pierce at claires, this is true

  • @AnythingForOurMoonyATYD
    @AnythingForOurMoonyATYD Před měsícem +6

    It's giving "I got my lobotomy at Claires" 😂

  • @titanqueen7217
    @titanqueen7217 Před 7 měsíci +3811

    When she said ‘organised crime’ I started picturing a mafia don who wears butterfly clips and body glitter. Come to think of it, Y2K Girl would be the perfect aesthetic for a mafia don, because who would ever think that a Y2K Girl was in with the mob?

    • @pvp6077
      @pvp6077 Před 7 měsíci +287

      Thanks now next time someone's talking about those wattpad mafia dons, this is what I'm gonna be picturing. $2000 pinstriped suit with cutesy pins on the lapel, hair slicked back with a kitty ear headband, glitter stick-on butterfly neck tattoo, mood pinky ring, plastic stretchy "tattoo" choker, and pink heart shaped sunglasses with gems on the rims.

    • @casscurrent4207
      @casscurrent4207 Před 7 měsíci +67

      JJBA: Golden Wind

    • @GSBarlev
      @GSBarlev Před 7 měsíci +44

      Madonna in the Weird Al biopic

    • @Polarchrome
      @Polarchrome Před 7 měsíci +43

      Reminds me of the girl in Bullet Train because no one thought she was a villian until the very end

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +34

      Reminds me of legally blond lol, pink lawyer, pink crime gang

  • @yann__
    @yann__ Před 7 měsíci +722

    the fact that it just goes from "organized crime" to "baking classes" 😂😂😂

    • @omnisexualidiot3750
      @omnisexualidiot3750 Před 6 měsíci

      And then to terrorism, human trafficking and hostage negotiations.
      Jack of all traits.

    • @chayden7652
      @chayden7652 Před 6 měsíci +12

      They're teaching people how to run the family business and the 'family business '. Always got to have your cover story. 😂

    • @PRETIZEL
      @PRETIZEL Před 6 měsíci +3

      Dental cleanings → Human Trafficking 💀💀💀

  • @randihigginbotham5070
    @randihigginbotham5070 Před měsícem +5

    Good to hear Claire’s is still strong in The Craft. 😂🙌🏾

  • @reallyeasy100
    @reallyeasy100 Před 2 měsíci +8

    you had me at insider trading. Time to re-visit Claire's

  • @The_KittenCatMEOW99
    @The_KittenCatMEOW99 Před 7 měsíci +2439

    “and smokey eyes.” 🙂
    😂😂😂😂

  • @bodhiswayze1892
    @bodhiswayze1892 Před 7 měsíci +3080

    Protect this woman at all costs. Her videos got me through the hardest grief of my life❤

    • @fanime1
      @fanime1 Před 7 měsíci +9

      Same 😢

    • @stinkygoat2686
      @stinkygoat2686 Před 7 měsíci +16

      That's great and everything but putting that level of pressure on a parasocial relationship is really fucked up.

    • @mgkzw
      @mgkzw Před 7 měsíci +57

      @@stinkygoat2686how LOL? ur reading into it too deeply, they’re just saying they appreciate her being able to get her out of a rough spot. where tf is the pressure

    • @elalala576
      @elalala576 Před 7 měsíci +41

      stanzi is nonbinary and uses they/them and she/her pronouns,I'm glad they helped you through something so difficult,hope you are doing better nowadays

    • @DayoOgunde
      @DayoOgunde Před 7 měsíci +2

      so glad you got through it!! 🩷🩷🩷

  • @rachelxh888
    @rachelxh888 Před 3 měsíci +13

    i love how the cashier looks kinda traumatized when she says "well you if need anything, and i mean *anything* "

  • @RemyDarling
    @RemyDarling Před 2 měsíci +1

    Why is this... SO ACCURATE? Claire's has EVERYTHING. "If you need anything, and I mean ANYTHING, you let me know."

  • @Kate-rj3hc
    @Kate-rj3hc Před 7 měsíci +2262

    "can i get a bf?"
    "look, we can only do things that exist"

    • @jayATUK
      @jayATUK Před 7 měsíci +83

      "And that includes time travel"

    • @juliamavroidi8601
      @juliamavroidi8601 Před 7 měsíci +37

      i think arranged marriage covers that

    • @TheEmeraldLunast75
      @TheEmeraldLunast75 Před 7 měsíci +1

      "Also, since you are in here, you are most likely gay." /j

    • @theredwolf3453
      @theredwolf3453 Před 7 měsíci +7

      Why did this break me?

    • @Meat_Duck_Dude
      @Meat_Duck_Dude Před 7 měsíci

      Human trafficking is one of their services. You might get lucky

  • @Mgfaulkner793
    @Mgfaulkner793 Před 7 měsíci +1578

    I FULLY believe Claire’s does organized crime.

    • @gs-8279
      @gs-8279 Před 7 měsíci +32

      And criminal investigations

    • @nicole6323
      @nicole6323 Před 7 měsíci +11

      They don't do criminal investigation well b/c someone who isn't me shoplifted so much from them as a young brat she could have retired with the amount she managed to get out of there with.😂😂😂

    • @drumblebee
      @drumblebee Před 7 měsíci +7

      honestly same bc how else are they still in business

    • @superjello3979
      @superjello3979 Před 7 měsíci +3

      And lobbying.

    • @trixiebewitched
      @trixiebewitched Před 7 měsíci +9

      Facts. Aint no way they stay open as long as they do in malls without being a front for something.

  • @jordyb57
    @jordyb57 Před 3 měsíci +3

    Poaching got me lol

  • @seungberry1439
    @seungberry1439 Před 3 měsíci +3

    I wanna see a Claire’s black market organization 😭

  • @LitchiLime
    @LitchiLime Před 4 měsíci +4976

    Shoutout to Julie, she’s such a doll. She gave me a free unicorn lip gloss with my new kidneys!

    • @triciad4100
      @triciad4100 Před 2 měsíci +132

      Someone arrest Julie! She was just supposed to pierce my ears but then I woke up in the Multiverse aisle without my kidneys!

    • @RUINXSAMS
      @RUINXSAMS Před 2 měsíci +61

      Julie was so nice! It was only a couple of my lungs I'll be fine.

    • @VelvetIsBestVee
      @VelvetIsBestVee Před měsícem +13

      Julie negotiated her own hostages

    • @KinDiedYesterday
      @KinDiedYesterday Před měsícem +8

      Julie is the goat, donating organ like candies

    • @Melissa_ReadsBooks
      @Melissa_ReadsBooks Před měsícem +5

      Omg, Julie helped you too, she was so amazing, she gave me a free tarot reading with each crime organized with her if I also bought a scalp massage

  • @chancemaillie5213
    @chancemaillie5213 Před 7 měsíci +211

    "and smokey eyes" gets me every fucking time lmao

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +7

      I mean it went from “of course we can murder someone for you” to “smokey eyes”

  • @Kann1bal_qu33n
    @Kann1bal_qu33n Před 3 měsíci +3

    "Taro readings" IM DEAD

  • @FoodVacuum-n6d
    @FoodVacuum-n6d Před 3 měsíci +2

    I like how the war crimes are mixed in with normal average stuff

  • @dogthievery101
    @dogthievery101 Před 7 měsíci +792

    It really is haunting whenever you hear, "If you need anything- and I mean _anything,_ just let me know," from a Claire's associate.

    • @AllTheHappySquirrels
      @AllTheHappySquirrels Před 7 měsíci +15

      It's giving, "Need that deadbeat gone from your couch? No questions asked. Reasonably priced and completely confidential."

  • @elle_roy1443
    @elle_roy1443 Před 7 měsíci +1517

    The “Dog walking/dog fighting” got me😭

  • @elmysti6664
    @elmysti6664 Před 2 měsíci +2

    They'll do anything to stay open 😂🤣 I've seen the one in my town "closing soon" so many times I assume it's their yearly joke now 😂🤣

  • @phoebthepancake
    @phoebthepancake Před 3 měsíci +2

    I love how every so often there'd be a 'normal' one but the very next one is so unhinged that its fallen off

  • @plant3341
    @plant3341 Před 6 měsíci +2938

    In an unfortunate mixup of departments, the deep sea sub we send down turned out to be a realistic cake

    • @sawnydawn
      @sawnydawn Před 6 měsíci +14

      😆

    • @conflicted_sides2855
      @conflicted_sides2855 Před 5 měsíci +29

      Nah it didn’t perform nearly as good as a cake sub

    • @stinkytoy
      @stinkytoy Před 5 měsíci +25

      Oh man that made me throw my head back and laugh into the sky hahahaha thank you

    • @redheadedbint
      @redheadedbint Před 5 měsíci +5

      I should not have laughed as hard as I did

    • @KrystalTheProtogen
      @KrystalTheProtogen Před dnem

      surprised you sent it who knows how deep before you realized it was cake..
      Let me guess, did it come with a cake ps4/3 controller?

  • @DontaskwhatIamwesring
    @DontaskwhatIamwesring Před 5 měsíci +233

    Clarie's feels like a fever dream

    • @DontaskwhatIamwesring
      @DontaskwhatIamwesring Před 5 měsíci +3

      Expect you think its real and slowly going insane

    • @riverstein7251
      @riverstein7251 Před 2 měsíci +7

      I went there to get my ears re-pierced when I was 15. The 16 year old with the piercing gun whispered in my ear “please don’t show pain, you’ll make it worse” then gestured with her eyes to the line of 9-10 year olds behind me.
      I complied, the 10 year old that was staring at me 5 feet away with laser focus yelled “She didn’t even flinch!” as the needle went in, and the (evidently nervous) 16 yo whispered “THANK YOU!” I left before I could hear the screams of all the children I just gaslit and my mom cackled when I told her what the girl told me.
      My piercings were infected a week later (karma, I guess). Also I ended up being a dude which explains why I didn't like wearing earrings to the point of needing them repierced a couple times.
      This memory gives me whiplash

    • @YW2324
      @YW2324 Před 2 měsíci

      Nah it's from an alternate Universe where Claire s is a bit sus

    • @blahco4tt
      @blahco4tt Před měsícem

      ​​@@riverstein7251​ Naw. They just really don't know what they're doing with ear piercings. Pretty sure they just hand the piercing gun to their newest employee and tell them "go!" No training whatsoever.
      By the way, one of my ears that was pierced there still has problems *20 years later* and I haven't worn earings for 19 of those 20...I'm going to see a derm about it. That cheap piercing isn't worth it! Go to a tat shop instead, although apparently Ulta does them and actually has certified cosmetologists who do them--instead of the "highly trained specialists" that apparently grace Claire's sales floor.
      Also, being a dude doesn't have anything to do with whether or not you get piercings, considering Goths, body artists, and the black community and black culture don't differentiate among the sexes when it comes to piercings. Heck, Travis Kelce--a white football player--has piercings. So...that sucks if someone (e.g. your parents) or a some peer group or whoever non-sensically associated piercing with "female". I know Spanish culture is that way...or was. It seems like everybody anymore is accepting piercings on males. And why not?!
      I know for me, assuming Claire's didn't permanently damage my ear, I've thought about getting both my ears re-pierced. However, as much as I'd like to flash my ear bling on nice occasions, I wouldn't want to wear and maintain earrings day to day, so it's a "no" for me.

  • @urfav_izzy925
    @urfav_izzy925 Před 3 měsíci +1

    “TSA Precheck” 😂

  • @littlepocketstudios8569
    @littlepocketstudios8569 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Hostage negotiations ia the most wild one to me idk why XD

  • @ember874
    @ember874 Před 7 měsíci +2680

    As someone who works in claires, they may not officially offer all of those options, but if you go to a good one (especially one of the ones in a Walmart) they employee can definitely help you with ANYTHING

    • @Pikmanx
      @Pikmanx Před 7 měsíci +16

      Where I live there is a really bad one 😭

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +44

      So it’s like a secret menu except at Clair’s, cool I’ll be getting Witchcraft lessons now

    • @GreaterLordJiji
      @GreaterLordJiji Před 7 měsíci +1

      Thank God I live in a claries free country lol

    • @cherryflavoredplaylist753
      @cherryflavoredplaylist753 Před 7 měsíci +18

      I will not be using this information wisely, thank you

    • @kialuvsyoo
      @kialuvsyoo Před 7 měsíci +10

      There's Claire's in Walmart? Where do you live?

  • @morgansmith3339
    @morgansmith3339 Před 5 měsíci +2191

    "I need to break a curse"
    "Just over there, ma'am."

  • @dcjokerhs
    @dcjokerhs Před 2 měsíci +1

    bhjjgghmj the loop tho
    "WHAT IS THIS PLACE?!"
    "Hi there! Welcome to Claire's!"
    lmao

  • @Greeceiscool
    @Greeceiscool Před měsícem +2

    We need a "Claire's, the multiverse"

  • @deadnova_
    @deadnova_ Před 7 měsíci +2647

    Golly thanks you remind me to go to Claire's I really needed to throw my nuclear wastes away

    • @5050TM
      @5050TM Před 7 měsíci +81

      The bodies. Don't forget to take the bodies.

    • @HecatesFavoriteDaughter
      @HecatesFavoriteDaughter Před 7 měsíci +53

      I gotta go for the witchcraft.

    • @brentterschegget235
      @brentterschegget235 Před 7 měsíci +41

      If your going there anyway could you please take these bribary checks with you for me

    • @_Just.Kay.Ya.Know_
      @_Just.Kay.Ya.Know_ Před 7 měsíci +31

      @@brentterschegget235 Alrighty, gotta go there for satanic rituals anyways, so might as well.

    • @AmazingAutist
      @AmazingAutist Před 7 měsíci +10

      ​@@brentterschegget235 You + are = you're. I hope this helps, I'm sincerely not trying to be rude but I know that rule often helps people who get those confused.

  • @elleumm
    @elleumm Před 7 měsíci +501

    Years ago, I had a friend who got arrested for shoplifting at Claire’s. Now I’m surprised they didn’t sell her organs on the black market. Bedazzled!

    • @toshaville
      @toshaville Před 7 měsíci +25

      Bedazzled black market organs. Fantastic. ❤

    • @brentmartin6833
      @brentmartin6833 Před 7 měsíci +11

      Well, it kinda makes sense. They wanted her friends to come and purchase stuff, and if their friend went missing, that might put them off. Or if they hired an investigation team from them, then what? Turn up the evidence that "Claire's" was the culprit, or never figure it out. Either way; looks bad.

    • @nolongeraperson
      @nolongeraperson Před 7 měsíci +4

      ​@NotVille_Quit being a bot.

    • @miroceliumart7397
      @miroceliumart7397 Před 7 měsíci

      @NotVille_you have one video .

  • @pyromaniacprincess4387
    @pyromaniacprincess4387 Před 6 dny +1

    As a current Claire's manager this was fucking GOLD

  • @lotstodo
    @lotstodo Před 3 měsíci +3

    This is the BEST video I've ever seen. I'm so happy. Now maybe I can get someone to fight that interdimential monster. That has been plagueing me.

  • @User47928
    @User47928 Před 5 měsíci +2707

    I truly believe that Claire’s is a space-time anomaly that should qualify as an SCP.

    • @eury4959
      @eury4959 Před 3 měsíci +62

      aight someone make a data log

    • @bingolinging
      @bingolinging Před 3 měsíci +22

      This needs to be a thing

    • @4everindenial
      @4everindenial Před 3 měsíci +26

      Someone call Dr. Sherman

    • @moonshinewitch404
      @moonshinewitch404 Před 3 měsíci

      SCP: C12[REDACTED] -Codename: Claire's.
      The first instance of C12[REDACTED] was found in a local mall in [REDACTED], Ohio. On November 5th of 1986. Employees seemed aware of the interdemenisonal portal(s) found in the store only when 'clocked in'. Once an employee is found 'clocked out' they retain no memory whatsoever of these portals. In fact when SCP staff took brainscans of employees the part of the brain that lights up with memory is found abesent once they are 'clocked out'. These portals are found to extend to almost every universe where a 'Claires' exist. Connecting not only to each other but through time and space. Some versions of these stores is found to still 'cater to teen girls' but what is sold always differs. Soemtimes, the differnce is as small as colors of items or the store logo. Other times it goes as far as one instance in INTDEM: 38X-[REDACTED] as offering services for nuclear fusion rather than ear piercings.

    • @SnaileyT
      @SnaileyT Před 3 měsíci +12

      @@4everindenial that’s what I said when I read that 😂

  • @ginnyweasley8090
    @ginnyweasley8090 Před 7 měsíci +1560

    "If you let these people go I'll give your these cute donut earrings and a tiara"
    "throw in a fluffy koala notebook" "Deal"
    😂💀

  • @samuelopoku4868
    @samuelopoku4868 Před 4 dny

    Only Stanzi makes Claire's terrifying and serial killing hilarious ...

  • @ThePencilOfChewed
    @ThePencilOfChewed Před 3 měsíci +1

    in the friend group im in, we like to joke that you can get a lobotomy at Claire's so this was hilarious to me

  • @iloveicecream127
    @iloveicecream127 Před 4 měsíci +2551

    Surprisingly “smoky eyes” was the most unbelievable thing out of all the things she listed 😂😂😂

    • @serenastarz867
      @serenastarz867 Před 2 měsíci +105

      I don’t trust for one second that they can actually do a decent smoky eye. Everything else seems legit.

    • @annakilifa331
      @annakilifa331 Před 2 měsíci +48

      ​@@serenastarz867 I mean, they didn't claim that they do all of those things *well*. They only said they do them. The quality was not part of the conversation. They don't do ear piercings well either, but they do them anyway.

    • @jodoodlyboi2963
      @jodoodlyboi2963 Před 2 měsíci +6

      ​@@annakilifa331 lmao so true

  • @MichaelAlbanese666
    @MichaelAlbanese666 Před 7 měsíci +547

    As someone who works at Claire’s I can confirm we have everything

  • @darkessinzero
    @darkessinzero Před dnem

    I don't know why but "tarrot reading" just cracked me up :D

  • @wintersdream2341
    @wintersdream2341 Před 2 měsíci +2

    Diversity is the key to survival

  • @auxomox
    @auxomox Před 7 měsíci +1062

    That's where i got my top surgery! Jessica was a gem, and I was able to give her some tips on the AP US History exam.

    • @brendatomlinson
      @brendatomlinson Před 7 měsíci +72

      Please tell me you left a good Yelp review!!

    • @JamesM1994
      @JamesM1994 Před 7 měsíci +44

      ​@NotVille_you sound jelly, are you jelly?

    • @RosenrotRtLiebchen87
      @RosenrotRtLiebchen87 Před 7 měsíci

      ​@NotVille_ you have a single video on your channel and it looks like shit so...

    • @cameroneridan4558
      @cameroneridan4558 Před 7 měsíci +40

      Got your teets yeeted at Claire's

    • @igottaseethemeaningofit
      @igottaseethemeaningofit Před 7 měsíci +13

      @NotVille_ dIDn'T AsK oh i'm sorry a random stranger on the internet didn't think to interrogate you in fear of your fee-fees being hurt before posting an amusing and harmless comment

  • @FishTorpedo
    @FishTorpedo Před 7 měsíci +1980

    Got my mastectomy done at that place. Becky was so helpful and I was even given a complimentary pack of butterfly clips.

    • @LeDollDonna
      @LeDollDonna Před 6 měsíci +14

      What the fuck they do that for real?

    • @CyberWarezz05
      @CyberWarezz05 Před 6 měsíci +31

      Did you also get your other nipple pierced?

    • @littlerat760
      @littlerat760 Před 6 měsíci +18

      ​@@LeDollDonnayep

    • @LeDollDonna
      @LeDollDonna Před 6 měsíci

      You're fucking with me right @@littlerat760

    • @owentheslug
      @owentheslug Před 6 měsíci +21

      Actually those lil clips are great for attaching your drains to your compression garment after the surgery.

  • @padalan2504
    @padalan2504 Před 18 hodinami

    I like how it didn't get gradually worse, the list was thoroughly mixed with mundane things.

  • @abbeyv4148
    @abbeyv4148 Před 2 měsíci

    “Domestic terrorism” followed by “scalp massages” really got me 😂

  • @jacobc9221
    @jacobc9221 Před 7 měsíci +294

    Damn Claire's employees have more jobs than Barbie

    • @fanime1
      @fanime1 Před 7 měsíci +25

      It's where all the Barbies that come to life go to to work

    • @TabysHere
      @TabysHere Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@fanime1 Now that explains it!

  • @amethystsmith2478
    @amethystsmith2478 Před 6 měsíci +3376

    I got my tubes tied and my ears peirced the same day at Claire's. It was a great experience ! In and out in 20 min.

    • @dreamiblu
      @dreamiblu Před 5 měsíci +48

      Underrated comment xD

    • @stealthis
      @stealthis Před 5 měsíci +52

      Sure they didn't mix the two of them up?

    • @ChanelNo.5-ck6uc
      @ChanelNo.5-ck6uc Před 4 měsíci +10

      Wait, fr?

    • @bubblegirl55
      @bubblegirl55 Před 4 měsíci +27

      @@ChanelNo.5-ck6uc nahh i think they are kidding. if its fr then 😭

    • @ChanelNo.5-ck6uc
      @ChanelNo.5-ck6uc Před 4 měsíci

      @@bubblegirl55 is that legal 😭

  • @amushroom8056
    @amushroom8056 Před 23 dny

    the fact that this all feels very in character for claires is hilarious to me 💀

  • @zero-cult
    @zero-cult Před 3 dny

    Tarrot reading got me good😂😂😂

  • @Tyrnak_Fenrir
    @Tyrnak_Fenrir Před 6 měsíci +175

    Missed opportunity to say
    - Organized crime
    - Unorganized crime

    • @erikblaas5826
      @erikblaas5826 Před 3 měsíci +1

      In a sense, if it needs any amount of preperation, time investment or any form of combat training, the crime is organized... But then again, if it's performed as a sloppy job and too much evidence has been left on the crime scene, it can be considered "unorganized", no matter how much prepping went into it.

    • @treacherousjslither6920
      @treacherousjslither6920 Před 2 dny

      ​​@@erikblaas5826 Poorly organized crime lol

  • @Lexsaysss
    @Lexsaysss Před 7 měsíci +225

    Your ability to show a character’s face morph from mildly amused to slowly unsettled to completely horrified/terrified should be studied, I’m dead serious 😂

  • @dacksonflux
    @dacksonflux Před 3 dny

    "... and smokey eyes."
    Killed me

  • @Alissandre_Iskander
    @Alissandre_Iskander Před 7 měsíci +2369

    Claire's is amazing. They rescued me and the rest of the people on my flight from the Bermuda Triangle and fed us a lovely roast chicken dinner and the cutest cupcakes for dessert.

    • @LazyMZM
      @LazyMZM Před 7 měsíci +41

      So that's where my baked goods went from our baking lessons...

    • @OG_Gabbi
      @OG_Gabbi Před 7 měsíci +18

      That roast chicken is Selena from criminal investigations on July 21st, 2007 at 4:23 AM

    • @UrM0M1234
      @UrM0M1234 Před 7 měsíci +9

      they kidnapped me n my roast chicken dinner and i think sum of that chicken is my arm😰😓😥

    • @AnjiLiena_
      @AnjiLiena_ Před 7 měsíci +4

      @@LazyMZMoh no it was me. I ate them while I was held hostage

    • @BlackTea717
      @BlackTea717 Před 7 měsíci +6

      The replies and the comment passed the vibe check.

  • @c4binet_m4n
    @c4binet_m4n Před 7 měsíci +191

    bye guys omw to get my top surgery at Claire’s

    • @frostrose8550
      @frostrose8550 Před 7 měsíci +14

      YES! I got mine there!

    • @brendatomlinson
      @brendatomlinson Před 7 měsíci +15

      Please find an alternative venue for bottom surgery thought! A bit more complexity involved. 😮

    • @kiera6326
      @kiera6326 Před 7 měsíci +15

      Omg good luck!! 🥰🥰

    • @passionate_possum_pal
      @passionate_possum_pal Před 7 měsíci +11

      ​@@brendatomlinsonhot topic for bottom surgery

    • @Holistic-Hallucinations
      @Holistic-Hallucinations Před 7 měsíci +2

      ​@@passionate_possum_palso dark you can't even tell what's wrong!

  • @alecryan8916
    @alecryan8916 Před 2 měsíci +2

    That heart plaid bag in the back ground would make 12 y/o mean go feral.

  • @JaeIBe
    @JaeIBe Před 3 měsíci +1

    I wanna see more of that shopper slowly losing their grasp on reality lmao

  • @starcloud0710
    @starcloud0710 Před 7 měsíci +1684

    this is why I love Claire’s
    - Witchcraft
    -Accessories
    - Hats
    - Plushies/toys
    - Therapy

    • @lewis5341
      @lewis5341 Před 6 měsíci

      with FREE asbestos!

    • @edits4ever_2022
      @edits4ever_2022 Před 6 měsíci +13

      Ew witchcraft
      It should be illegal

    • @user-gm4jy8tc2l
      @user-gm4jy8tc2l Před 6 měsíci +41

      ⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠@@edits4ever_2022
      By air and earth
      By water and fire
      So you be bound
      As I desire
      By three and nine
      Your power i bind
      By moon and sun
      My will be done
      Sky and sea
      Keep harm from me
      Cord go round
      Power be banned
      LIGHT REVEALED
      NOW BE SEALED

    • @Dr._Kyo
      @Dr._Kyo Před 6 měsíci +26

      ​@@edits4ever_2022Ew you
      You should be illegal

    • @user-md1xc1bf9f
      @user-md1xc1bf9f Před 6 měsíci

      ​@@user-gm4jy8tc2lcool Rhythms though

  • @kiernanmatlock6698
    @kiernanmatlock6698 Před 7 měsíci +548

    I’d been saving a pic for YEARS that says ‘I got my top surgery at claire’s’ & finally got to use it to announce mine on sm 😸😸

    • @isabellabaxter
      @isabellabaxter Před 7 měsíci +15

      Yayyyyy! Congrats ❤😊

    • @erickspoonakis
      @erickspoonakis Před 7 měsíci +8

      came here to comment about the same meme lmao
      congratulations!!! :D

    • @AstroIsWatching
      @AstroIsWatching Před 7 měsíci +4

      Congrats!

    • @broblerone413
      @broblerone413 Před 7 měsíci +1

      congrats!!

    • @eyezzzaza
      @eyezzzaza Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@erickspoonakisyou got too surgery at Clair’s? I thought Clair’s still only did ear piercings and that it was a meme

  • @B.Harper7
    @B.Harper7 Před měsícem

    Claires being the secret underground railroad for smishsmortions was not on my 2024 bingo card 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

  • @liamfoxy
    @liamfoxy Před dnem

    I saw a bumper stucker the other day that said "I got my lobotomy at Claire's" 😂

  • @charliegreen7988
    @charliegreen7988 Před 7 měsíci +1447

    I’m happy to know I’m not the only one who feels like Claire’s has this energy that strikes fear into my heart

  • @ronnieferguson9337
    @ronnieferguson9337 Před 7 měsíci +1401

    Claire’s REALLY needs to use this as an actual commercial! Now I want to go on their website and give them all my money!

    • @audreyvanhulzen6522
      @audreyvanhulzen6522 Před 7 měsíci +12

      love that she paired domestic terrorism with scalp massages

  • @Tawroset
    @Tawroset Před 3 měsíci +1

    OMG I absolutely got to visit Claire's since their, err, expansion.😂

  • @JudgementsEclipse
    @JudgementsEclipse Před 7 dny

    Love how I didn't flinch at hostage negotiations, but at tarot readings xD
    I'd let Clairs read my cards!

  • @concernedmartian6430
    @concernedmartian6430 Před 7 měsíci +589

    Claire's is a bit of a fever dream but I love the shop

  • @tensai_kodai
    @tensai_kodai Před 7 měsíci +111

    I remember when I got my BBL done at Claire's! It was so convenient since I was meeting with the King of Napal that very same day and the wonderful girl at the front (thank you, Lisa!) helped me get right past those pesky "no fly list 🙄" restrictions. I even got to meet Claire, herself! They keep the essence of her trapped in a Trapezohedron in the back 🥰

  • @Lyricidal0X
    @Lyricidal0X Před 2 měsíci +2

    Claires finalized my divorce and then sent someone to fix my HVAC system

  • @ihaveacat2756
    @ihaveacat2756 Před 2 měsíci

    I like how you squeezed “ocean cleanups” in through all the other horrors 😂

  • @JoeVirella
    @JoeVirella Před 7 měsíci +83

    “Ocean clean up, crime scene clean up” 😂

    • @michiiii94
      @michiiii94 Před 7 měsíci +5

      "Dog walking, dog fighting" 😂😂

    • @Chi.Chi.Catt.
      @Chi.Chi.Catt. Před 7 měsíci +3

      “Disposing of Nuclear Waste, Ocean Gate Tours”😭😭😭

    • @designsonq1
      @designsonq1 Před 7 měsíci

      Plus, organized crime...
      Get the 2-fer.

    • @mbmd_nation
      @mbmd_nation Před 7 měsíci

      That escalated quickly

  • @moxiebombshell
    @moxiebombshell Před 6 měsíci +951

    This list is fucking iconic.

    • @samuelboczek1834
      @samuelboczek1834 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Domestic terrorism is real tho 😭

    • @WitchKing-Of-Angmar
      @WitchKing-Of-Angmar Před 4 měsíci

      It's called having a creative working mind.... but I'm sure anything like that is immensely impressive to your generation.

    • @serendibite1598
      @serendibite1598 Před 4 měsíci +1

      ​@@WitchKing-Of-Angmar What's immensely impressive is someone not taking every opportunity to shit on other people.

  • @shiota8511
    @shiota8511 Před 2 měsíci +1

    no wonder it’s so hard to find job nowadays. with claire employee being trained to do absolutely everything

  • @Izzy_gee
    @Izzy_gee Před měsícem +2

    I got my lobotomy at Claire’s ✨

  • @MarenMcBrideVB29
    @MarenMcBrideVB29 Před 7 měsíci +1380

    I actually got a colonoscopy at claire’s and my doctor, daisy was definitely qualified and she even did my nails and gave me a unicorn headband after! Great service!

    • @26rainydays
      @26rainydays Před 7 měsíci +71

      Oh wow, I didn’t know they did nails

    • @minivan1680
      @minivan1680 Před 7 měsíci +38

      You're just gonna blow past Daisy the doctor? Duke did my colonoscopy last week, and he's the regular. I don't know any Daisy's.

    • @amijacks
      @amijacks Před 7 měsíci +9

      I want a 🦄 headband!

    • @TherianMinerThing
      @TherianMinerThing Před 6 měsíci +10

      I’m autistic so when I got my ears pierced there at 7 years they had to give me a lolly just to shut me up

    • @nicholasmcclure2890
      @nicholasmcclure2890 Před 6 měsíci +9

      Come on now we all know you paid extra for the headband don't lie to us.