Dungeon Master Kicked Out because of THIS?? | Reading D&D Reddit Stories
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- čas přidán 23. 05. 2024
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What is the CRAZIEST way you have seen someone being kicked out of a group??
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Timestamps
0:00 Intro
1:17 1st Horror Story
2:55 Sponsor
4:28 1st Horror Story (Continued)
11:19 1st Uplifting Story
12:59 2nd Horror Story
21:11 2nd Uplifting Story
22:38 Outro
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Is there a way to share GOOD DnD stories for these types of videos?
Hey Duke and Wife, these videos are awesome! But the white line in the middle when only you 2 are on screen is a bit awkward
I threw the advice out the window, now I need a new laptop
One day they should do the intro like "I am Amy, and this is Husband!"
Just flip the script :D
Don’t tempt us….
^_^
April fools day would be perfect for this
@@OneShotQuesters Or "This is Dutchess and..."
dew it@@OneShotQuesters
As an autistic person and a massive TTRPG player, I agree with many in the comments: the husband doing that is not okay.
Agreed.
@@thegrandxbunny2073 I agree to your agreeing.
@@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV I agree to your agreeing to their agreement
Agreed. Honestly, I feel (and mind you, I'm autistic too, but female) like there's definitely a non-zero number of autistic men out there who feel like they can use their autism as an excuse to just be a gigantic douchecanoe and then when people get mad, they're like "Oh well, can't be helped, I'm autistic, so you are just supposed to accept me being a douchecanoe to you or else you're ableist!". I hate those kinds of people.
Perhaps there's female (or non-binary?) autistic people out there who do this too (I haven't really seen any myself), but just so often it will be dudes. They just have learned that they can bully their way through life without consequences when pulling the autism card and so they will do so as often as possible. Like I say, I'm autistic too, but that doesn't mean I get a free pass to bully people (which is clearly what this husband was doing). So yeah, eff those people, because they give all of us autists a bad name.
@@yasmeenahmaiden I have the same experiences as you, just with the gender roles switched. They often used any "card" they could just to "win". Ableism, sexism, homophobia, the list goes on. Those people suck. And they definitely give the groups they belong to (Autistic people, men, women, queer people) an undeserved bad name. Just remember folks, everyone has the ability to be an absolute D*ckhead! No matter how their brains work, what gender they are, or who they are attracted to!
**raises her hand** I was that one person purposely excluded! I had been invited but she changed her mind without telling me and stealthily made a new group to purposely exclude me while I was patiently waiting for the session 0. This is the entire reason why I now DM. Oh, I'm also not friends with that person any more.
Oh my gosh that’s happened to me before to!
Everyone likes having a dm so you will get lots of games from people who will probably want to play with you.
I got told after 6 years of playing that since our dm was moving that our game was no longer running. I found out months later that they had continued online just without me.
@@RogueKeioh that sucks
thats awful
Story 1: If you're paying for someone to DM for you, you're paying for an equal place in the spotlight. If you're an inexperienced player, then you're paying for the DM to directly help you during your turn in the spotlight. I would be ashamed to be that bad as a DM and then insist that people pay me for the privilege of having me ignore them.
Unfortunately demanding money from people then ripping them off once you have it is one of those "new normals" I keep being told I need to accept.
@@DolFan316it’s not new, just never exchange money without a written contract.
I would’ve just pvp’d the other two players and if I lost come back with a meta build to kill them
Oh my the autism one hit SO HARD I'm almost crying. My son is 24 and moderately autistic. We joined an in person game and the other people have been so kind, helpful, and welcoming. I'm just getting diagnosed in my 50's and I've joined 3 games online and I tear up thinking about how I've been met with open arms when I expected to be shunned. 😥 THIS is my social outlet
And the PTSD is no joke. I was excluded my entire childhood. I found "my people" in high school and college. Then we moved and became parents. I was never accepted into any parent friendships or groups even doing "all the right things" such as volunteering, class mom, helping whenever asked. It was awful and I still have no local friends. I couldn't imaging inflicting this on someone else!
As an autistic person (I do NOT side with the husband who tried to exclude the dm,I'm not talking about that story I'm talking about Dukes story) that's been my whole life. It stops hurting when you get used to it. And now I'm really good at being alone, which made moving across the country easier.
Nice job taking adversity and using it to be stronger and more adaptive, though I don't agree that you should have been treated that way. I hope you find good people to spend your time with, that's a struggle for us all, autism spectrum or not. Cheers.
I've run into people in online autism groups. One guy was a plumber who wanted to start his own business that only catered to other Autistics because he hated NTs. Dude had a serious grudge.
@@Autibots_troll_out Again, I wasn't talking about that. I will say it can be exhausting to be around neurotypicals but they can be really cool and nice. He might just have wanted a break. It isn't easy to interact with people who essentially speak a different language all the time. It's possible you misunderstood him and he didn't mean to say he hated neurotypicals. But it's also possible he did, and that isn't constructive. Neurodiversity goes both ways and even if neurotypicals aren't kind we still have to set an example. It's hard though, to always be an ambassador. Please remember to be patient with us and don't look at bad examples to decide who we are. But even if you only see bad examples, we are humans and deserve to be treated as such.
@@nikacomedawn Oh, he clearly stated he hates NTs. I'd really only started looking into groups like that after my own diagnosis because I was not in a good place at the time and thought I'd seek advice on navigating my own shortcomings to change my situation from others who experience the same. You're right, it's easier talking to people about this stuff on the same wavelength. However, it doesn't mean everyone with ASD is on the same wavelength. I've seen NDs who were just as petty and selfish as some NTs are. I think the biggest issue I have are the ones who solely define themselves by their ASD so they're unwilling to develop any further beyond that. Bully's do the same thing; put you in that box and only see you as that box they put you in.
I can't put one person's behavior on anyone else, but there are certain behaviors exhibited by certain thought processes and those patterns are observable. Most likely, he just didn't like the guy and used ASD as an excuse.
I'm autistic and I've been excluded from a lot of things. Wasn't expecting to cry during this. :(
I did too. I just found the online D&D community a few months ago and I'm just starting to feel I can be accepted
Good luck to both of you. Acceptance is a challenge, autism spectrum or not, for lots of people. Keep trying, we all deserve people who care and respect us.
@@kelceydane5874 Yeah, and travel is a problem whether or not your paraplegic, but one group clearly has more challenge with it than not. This is an ableist comment you gave. Please do not diminish peoples issues. Feel free to share your own personal issues, in specific or vague, but don't diminish others by saying that 'a lot' of people have trouble with something.
@@user-tf8xr8wc9u diminish? The statement you're complaining about seems to be including them with everyone else how exactly is that diminished? that they're not set aside on a pedestal being treated like special snowflakes? Last I checked this was a group game for everyone is supposed to set aside their personal issues and work as a team/cohesive party at the gaming table.
@@user-tf8xr8wc9u they aren't saying "lots of people struggle, get over it" they are saying "lots of people struggle, you aren't alone, we support you"
The proclamation "Everyone is welcome here" is inherently foolish. Every group has standards, morals, and chemistry. Not everyone is going to fit in every group. That's life. That's freedom of association.
For the most part you need to follow the old expression of “Friends who want to stay friends don’t discuss religion or politics” possibly add sex to that category if only to stop someone from taking the fact this game is 18+ and going too far.
does anybody know which chanel he is talking about?
@@emberfist8347 My best friend and I discuss politics all the time. I prefer not to at the game table, however.
@@lauramarschmallow2922Yeah I’m curious too.
I know he posted some photo in a community post that we saw. Some fans commented that he’d been invited to Smosh and congratulated him. I have yet to see any episode on Smosh with him as a guest. But that doesn’t entirely line up with “no invite” story though. So 🤷♀️.
My best guess is anyone he’s played D&D with right before his channel took off. And then something that friend did (as a player, not a DM) without him within the past year?
And THAT'S beautifully said.
You don't do a targeted story line the first session. You just don't. One it is the first session should be about bringing the group together and everyone learning each other characters. Two which is part of one. No one cares about those two peoples story lines or characters because they never met them before. Having a session or maybe a few focused on the story arc of one character is fine when everyone is invested in each other.
Yea, it sounds like if those 2 wanted to play out their pre-game connections they should've had a private session 0.5 to play out how they became a pair of adventurers before meeting the rest.
So that autism story hit for me for a few reasons. First because I’m autistic and have had a lot of issues making friends because of it. Also I have been told by multiple programs that I’m not autistic enough for them to help me, which is frustrating when I’m in a debilitating state. Also hearing your story just made me sad. I can relate to being the kid on the playground not getting to hang out with others. Even with my best friend, because his friends didn’t like me, and he would rather hang out with them. That one stung. Personally you are my favorite D&D CZcamsr and I’d love to play a game with you sometime, and maybe even colab. You seem like a really cool dude. Best of luck to you.
It's funny that I have an experience as someone with autism who plays games and it ended up being very different.
Context: I play at a table where the DM is openly gay, and he preferred to invite his friends, including me, to play, and he has already made it clear that no form of discrimination would be tolerated, and well, the DM is one of my best friends and you know that I'm autistic, and the rest of the group is very diverse, including neurotypicals, one with ADHD and so on.
In the current mission, the group was going to Kryptgarden to get the power up tattoo, and to enter the forest without attracting the attention of an ancient Dragon who lives there, we went looking in the nearby cities for hunters or druids who used to enter the forest , and in this the DM presented us with an autistic NPC, where he has very obvious characteristics of the spectrum but these characteristics were linked to a faerie ancestry, where his powers were mixed with the common characteristics of the spectrum. As I recognized the speech and behavior patterns close to mine, I asked him if that was true, and he confirmed that yes, and that despite being Neurotypical, he wanted to try this approach, trying to be as respectful as possible and that if I were bothered I would Talk to him about what you could do to break out of bad stereotypes like Good Doctor or Sheldon Cooper.
How did u feel about it though
random thing i remember from my first D&D group was one of the guys decided to try being the DM for the first time and when we were taking a break to get drinks he asked us how he was doing, the previous DM who was the only one who had played before this group said "lets save our constructive criticism for the end" and i immediately respond with "does it have to be constructive?"
after a moment of silence the previous DM yells to the current DM "YOU SUCK" it was all in good humor and everyone had a laugh. the DM did good btw.
I’ve been through two separate year-long campaigns and I’m now DMing my first and to be honest, I could count on one hand the number of “rough” sessions we’ve had. 99% of the time spent in our campaigns has been a blast.
Same, I have been with my current party for 3 years in the same campaign and I can't even think of a session that was so bad it's negative memory. You just have to know the people you start your campaign with, and know that you can trust them.
As an autistic that guy is giving us a bad reputation.
Also the Dragon Prince show is amazing.
I also have autism, that dude was being a d*ck
sincerely that guy's behavior is weird for someone autistic (i mean, being against following the rules and lying and excluding the guy, isn't that the things autistic folks was supposed to be bad at and less likely to be involved?)... so is he 0.o (he might be i guess but what would make them kinda atypical?) /actually curious, actually
@@tetrisuno764 na being a shitty person isn't really autistic just that guy
tho, i feel like a possible explanation is the narrator is omitting something about which rules it's about🤔/i don't know what this might be
p.s: for the record i'm also autistic or something
@@tetrisuno764 mmmm I mean if he didn't wanna play the game cuz of the rule systems he didn't have to but inviting everyone else but him in a different group just to get back at him is a bit of a mean thing to do and I don't think it's just an ASD thing. Like being mad bcuz people won't change the game so you are the one having fun is just main character syndrome
Being excluded sucks. I have a bunch of coworkers that I'd like to be friends with, but because I don't drink alcohol, they feel awkward inviting me to after-work hangouts. I am super lucky to have a group of people that both belong to my social group and play DND.
Speaking as an autistic guy... if the guy had actually been meaning to run an all autistic game, I don't see a problem with that. Interacting with autistic people can be recharging for autistic folks, and I think it could be good to have an all autistic space like that. However, that isn't what he did. He was just being a jerk because he didn't like the DM of the original campaign he left. Again, it comes down to being honest, decent, and accurate in what it is you want to do, and communicating it correctly to others. While autistic people can have some trouble explaining to non-autistic people what they mean, I'm not willing to give this guy the benefit of the doubt on it, because it's clear to me that that is not what happened.
I do see a problem with that, because it's discrimination. Refusing to allow players into your game based on what they were born as or developed into is wrong. Refusing to allow players into your game because of how they play D&D, and how their playing of it wouldn't fit, is not wrong. Never decline a player based on what they were born as or became. Focus on the D&D itself, and if they're decent people who aren't purposefully trying to start drama with everyone. Just because someone isn't Autistic doesn't mean they can't understand how to play a game with Autistic people. Same for LGBT+ games. There should never be LGBT+ only games. There should be games that include LGBT+, and Allies who aren't going to cause drama. Just like how there should be Cishet games, and LGBT+ players who aren't going to cause drama. As long as everyone can play the D&D in a way that fits for everyone involved, there should be no reason to deny them.
@@nyxnightmare3542 It's not uncommon for irl cultures which suffered through opression to become closed from outsiders. (taking stuff from jewish or native american culture is cultural appropriation due to that kinda. Those are closed cultures, usually as a result of past g3n0cides and a need to preserve cultural identity against people who would pervert it - kinda like how pop culture wendigo is different from native american wendigo)
So, i think it's important to acknowledge this dynamic in other types of people groups.
It might not be great, but there is a different context:
1. If an autistic group wants to not have non-autistic people, then they are quite likely wanting a safespace.
2. If a non-autistic groups wants to have no autistic ppl, then they are promoting discrimination of autistic ppl.
The power dynamic is kinda different.
So, an autistic only group might not be great, but it isn't even remotely as bad as non-autistic only group due to this power dynamic.
For fairness sake, it should be noted that maybe my comparison to cultural appropriation might be not very good, as pervertion of culture and such can be seen as weaker continuation of a g3n0cide - cultural g3n0cide is still seen as a g3n0cide internationally iirc.
@@nyxnightmare3542 I find interacting with neurotypicals every day of my life to be very draining, and for me, it is about having a safe space where I can freely be me, without needing to mask my genuine autistic self. That doesn't mean I wouldn't play D&D with neurotypicals, in fact, the vast majority of the time, I have to, as the autistic population is a tiny group, only around 1% of the global population. It doesn't mean I can't enjoy play with neurotypical people, I do. But sometimes, it is nice to have a space where I am not under the strain I have to experience every second of every day in public. That safe space is important for maintaining my mental health while still being able to socialize.
Very well put!
If he (douchebag husband) had had other friends with autism (not in the original group) that he wanted to introduce to D&D, and he maybe asked one or two players to join in so they’d have a full party, that’d be one thing.
But re-creating the group to intentionally exclude ONE person you have a problem with (and then lie about it) is a major dick move.
@@nyxnightmare3542Thing is, it wasn't about wanting a Safe Space.
The guy used his Autism as an excuse to purposely exclude someone because he didn't _like_ the original DM.
Love the funny stories in between the bad ones. Definitely love to hear those as it really brings up the mood!
Yeah, that's a great touch !
That last one reminded me of a pathfinder session I was playing recently...
We we trying to get over a wall with a closed portcullis in it, so our barb threw our ranger to the top where she tied a rope to let us climb up. The barb holds the rope still since my character is an incredibly scrawny oracle and he wanted to aid, turning my -1 into a 0 mod.
Of course I immediately rolled a 1, slipping around the rope while trying to climb and getting tangled, before the barb gives it a shake and I fall out of said tangle... We then hear a giggling sound as a there was a gargoyle watching the entire thing happen.
I've been excluded from a group before. A couple of friends were talking about starting a campaign for a few weeks, and I'd always ask if I could join or that I'd want to play. After a while they started talking about the first session, and I asked why I wasn't invited and got hit with the "oh, I didn't know that you wanted to play"
I'm not autistic, but I was heavily bullied through out my elementary and middle school days. Being intentionally left out of things like that is so beyond hurtful, because it makes you wonder if you are the problem when really the problem is the people that want to control everything.
I absolutely LOVE the good stories between the horror stories. Let's be real we are here for the drama but that just makes the good stories so much better
Stuff like "everyone is welcome" and the concept of "allies" is basically a red flag for me nowadays, because it's pretty much always a thinly veiled attempt to *sound* inclusive and welcoming, only to be absolute assholes or manipulative douchebags behind closed doors when others aren't looking. It's deceitful, it's dishonest, and oftentimes they wind up being easily set off by the most mundane things, or have a short fuse over just about any topic or conversation. People like that don't do well in social settings, especially when you put a bunch of them together and create a toxic cesspool of attitude. If anything it just creates an echo chamber for the toxicity to ingrain itself and grow because they're all validating each others bad behaviour and tactics.
that 1st funny tale was basically the embodiment of Jack Horner's "Well, that was weird" 😂
UPLIFTING: I was DMing a session of Vaesen, and went through some creepy & horrific side-scenes for the various characters. One character - a servant/detective was essentially home alone at their base of operations, left behind with a crippling injury to both legs.
The catch was that a troll-ogress fey in the cellar that this character grew up with (and was terrified of) was signalling that it was ravenous and that it was tea time (it needed to be fed tea, cucumber sandwiches, and perfectly poached eggs). Knowing that there would be catastrophic trouble, the poor servant had to navigate getting into a wheelchair by herself, getting out of the huge 1800's house, and getting eggs from the chicken coop. All while being stealthy, just in case someone saw her - she did not want to appear helpless.
It got weird - there was a weird spirit in the coop that needed to be convinced that the servant could take the eggs, the group would be arriving home soon, and then there was the getting up the stairs into the house, while carrying eggs and still being in the wheelchair. After using every resource & tactic she had, somehow the servant pulled it all off, made the tea, appeased the cellar spirit, and had a moment to enjoy her lunch just as her friends came back. This short story was such a hard deviation from the nail-biting previous stories that is had everyone in nervous tears of laughter as it all went down. The wildest and strangest pallet cleanser ever.
I'm a father of 4 kids, 2 being autistic. My wife and I strive to teach our kids to respect and love everyone. My oldest occasionally gets excluded from things because of his unique perspectives. This has led him to want to be a life coach to help others know that it is ok to be different.
I have started to introduce to them to board games and strategy games, all in hopes of playing D&D with them. Duke, I am sorry to hear you were excluded from any group, but know that my family would gladly invite you and your family to our sessions (once my kids are older and not winning every game I introduce them to).
My lizardfolk sorcerer/barbarian once jumped into a well to avoid vampires. Held his breath for an hour. They tore up the inn that was next to it…
Those lil scenarios, like Duke shared, can truly end up being defining social moments that last a lifetime. Its really sad that stuff that can happen in childhood to young adult can define how you view things because of a single moment.
For the first story, the paid DM did a crappy job. It is rather different when playing with friends for free but you need to get everyone feeling they are getting their money's worth, particularly in the first session. After you played a few you can certainly dedicate a session to a specific player, rotating so everyone get's that eventually but when you do it the first session it sets the tone for the rest of the campaign. It doesn't matter who you know and who is a new player, get them their money's worth or they will never come back.
I know some people take up a bit more space then others and that is natural but when people are paying for an experience, they shouldn't be feeling like an NPC. If the 2 MC syndrome players were the only one paying that would be different but now the DM lost at least one paying customer, probably several and he risk his reputation as well, it is hard to get more customers if rumors say that your product is bad, that is basic capitalism.
As for the second one, I think the sin is that the husband lied to the other players and said that OP didn't want to play. That is rather mean and pointless, if he said "there is just room for 5 players in my game I don't really see a problem, most campaigns have a specific number of seats for several reasons. I for instance usually don't run more then 5 or 6 players since I don't feel I can spend enough time on each players of there is more. In other campaigns you have story reasons for it, like you have a specific amount of set roles or maybe each character have the power of an element or whatever. In pre written stuff adding or taking away players requires the DM to re-balance everything and more inexperienced DMs might not want (or feel they are able to do that right) to do that.
So yeah, everyone you know are not likely to be able to join most campaigns. There are exceptions and some campaigns even span multiple groups with their own DMs switching players and what one group do affects the entire world but those things are pretty rare. So not being able to join every campaign might feel disappointing but it isn't mean.
What "husband" did however was gaslighting and that is not very nice, if someone can't join your group you can at least tell them and the other players that. Setting up a secret group to avoid a single player is not really how I would like my game.
The story about "being excluded from a group" always does sting.
I can’t relate it to DnD, but I am very familiar with that feeling on being the "odd man out" of my group of friends.
They would never exclude me intentionally (at least I hoped it was never intentional) but there was never a worse feeling during (secondary) school than having a normal day hanging out and then realizing your friend where having a conversation about a night out, or a party, or a random get together that you weren’t a part of.
I don’t expect to be invited to everything, to hang out with these people all the time, and there’s a chance I might’ve been busy or turned them down if they had asked. What hurt is none of them ever asked if I wanted to come to these things. I never got invited to the nights out, or the parties. instead I would hear about them after the fact as they shared stories amongst each other, or would outright recount these tales to me directly because they were funny. And all the while I would have to stand there and listen realising over and over I had never been invited. Not even by my best friend, who hosted many of these gatherings over the years, so much as mentioned any of them until after they came and went.
I mentioned this years later to him and he gave a fairly plausible reasoning as to why I was never considered to be invited. The old classic "we didn’t think you’d enjoy it, it’s not your kind of thing." While that may have been 100% accurate, it still stung they never asked me. Sad thing is we kind of drifted apart over the last five years since so those moments I missed are also memories I wish I had.
(In line of "watching the group form in front of you", I had a narrow escape to that feeling in university when the friend group I was a part of were opening planing a meet up the next day. None of them had mentioned it to me, or outright invited me so I assumed I wasn’t invited. I wasn’t as miffed because there was another guy in this same group who was in the same boat, so we took it as it was a small gathering and wasn’t fussed. We all got to hang out regularly anyway (more regularly than my previous friend group) so I didn’t feel like I was missing out.
The day of, one of them called me and officially invited me in the end, hence the lucky escape of that familiar sting.
(I ended up turning down the invite unfortunately, due to some awkwardness between me and another group member caused by something I said the previous night. The caller told me she would be okay if I was there, but I didn’t want things to be weird so I turned it down. So that was a whole separate drama.))
The way you help a beginner player is to encourage them to describe what they are going to do.
“Your character is now in X situation, you as a **CLASS** can do X, Y or Z depending on features and whatnot. What would you like to do?”
Be more explicit about what the newbie CAN do, and then help them navigate the system to do what they want to do. As they stick around for multiple sessions, slowly let off the back-seating as they start to become familiar with their character and how the system works. And, this is CRITICAL: the back-seating must ALWAYS be of the type “You can do X/Y/Z/A/B/C/etc., what do you want to do?” You lay the choices at the newbie’s feet, and you let them decide what to do. Sometimes you can warn them “Doing *that* is… um… not the best choice for F/G/H reason, you sure you wanna… oh, okay, brace for potentially rough outcomes!”
Educate, educate, educate. You don’t need to repeat stuff unless the player asks “How does X work again?” In that case, repeat until they understand (make sure they confirm “I get it” or “oh, I understand” etc.).
I am running a campaign with my two friends. It's actually my favourite d&d game I've been apart of. Around session 5 they found out that they were long lost sisters and they've been thrown into the midst of a civil war. They both get equal time to engage and we all have a good time. Combat is awkward, but we're not a combat focused party, nor is the world really combat focused
The alternation between horror stories and funny/glory stories is a nice change. Really acts as a metaphorical palette cleanser.
Next year will be my 40th year as a GM for TTRPG's, I started with the original Red box set.
Congrats!!
Thank you for including the funny and uplifting stories in between it really does balance it out and remind people that while there are bad things in this world there are good things to
Okay I have to share this story, I DMed for a group this one time and I was playing a gross stinkiy old dwarf named doc who had valuable information for the party, the whole time I was playing him I was holding back a fart cuz I'm a woman and didn't want to fart in front of the group, needless to say it slipped out and I just went with it, it was a long stinky loud fart, but it fit the character so well the whole table bust out laughing Hysterically😂
😂😂😂
1st story: I'm an experienced player (nearly 30 years), and when I'm playing any game, if there are people I don't know well, who are quieter, I really strive to find ways to draw them in. Whatever character I'm playing, I'll find things to ask them about, for their opinion, or to help me with something, etc. It is easy to just get drawn in to the story with the more outgoing players. So I just try to make sure to make quieter players feel welcome. This game does not sound like anyone made any of that effort. I hope the OP sends feedback to the paid DM about this. I don't know if he's experienced with paid games, if he already knew those players like Duke and Wife suggest, or if he was just responding instinctively to the people who were the most assertive. Sometimes the DM has plans to give everyone their moment in the spotlight, but it involves some players getting more time there than others in any given session. Except in that situation the DM will usually reassure everyone that their moment is yet to come. Regardless, please let DM know what your experience was, and hopefully they will do better in the future.
2nd story: Wow. Um. First. If he had really wanted a game just for autistic people, I think you can run a good game with any number of players if you plan for it. But obviously that person just doesn't like OP, IMO, and used it as an excuse to exclude them. I've been left out myself, and it sucks, when a group I played with, another person in the group started a game and I was told there was not room for me. But everyone else was there. It absolutely sucked. I felt so rejected and miserable. This was several years ago, and later, one of the players from that group brought me into another group, so at least it wasn't *everyone* who didn't want me there. (Also, I found out a year or so ago that I'm autistic! Woohoo! It explains so much!)
We have a cleric who’s player ended up in a very nasty family situation after a death in their family. We immediately told them that IRL comes first, that they can come back to the game whenever they are in a better place, and that they can talk/vent to us at any time.
Several sessions later, nothing about that situation has changed unfortunately, but we are not giving up on including them if they ever want to come back.
Life sucks sometimes. Don’t raise barriers because you’re afraid of getting hurt. Be open to pain, so you can be there for the friends you care about when they are suffering. You ain’t Jesus even if you try to be, but if you can at least attempt to be like Jesus? Usually no harm comes from that. A weird way to put it, but I hope the point gets across 😂
I had a similar experince with the 2nd story.
This was after I got back from BMT (Basic Military Training) and Tech School (where I learned specifics about my job). During that time, my parents were getting divorced and it really affected me in a negative way especially after I came backnto a very fractured home.
Well, I had a group of friends who I previously played D&D with before going to college and one of them invited me to play. It was awesome as it not only served as an escape from everything but also reminded me how much I enjoyed it.
Fast forward to some time later and I never heard back from the group (it was close to about 6 months since I last heard from them). I reached out to them and never got a response back as to whether we were playing.
One day at work, I got a call from the friend that invited me in the first place and said that a couple people in the group hated how I played D&D. No explanation as to what I did specifically and I honestly still don't know to this day as they never reached out to me and said anything.
Afterwards, I started my own group and have never looked back. When I do, it still frustrates me and makes me very sad.
This is becoming my new favourite internet series. Strictly in it for the juicy drama 🎉
The key component to most ttrpg horror stories is people need to communicate more. I've currently got a group imploding because one player spit the dummy when I didn't follow their expectations that were never communicated in the first place.
I love the palette cleanse of funny stories!!! Thank you so much for them!!!
I had a similar "not worthy" enough moment. And to me now it doesn't matter the type of people, but yes it does indeed suck a ton.
Duke's not alone. A so-called friend I used to RPG with got married and everyone else in the group got an invitation except me. He actually told me mine got lost in the mail! Even worse, nobody else wanted to even discuss this. They'd give me the old "look away awkwardly" routine when I asked why.
My former “friends” would create a new group chat every few months with everyone but me in it. Within a week or 2 one of the same couple of people would feel bad and add me in. A few months later it would happen again. By the time I left the group there were probably 20-30 dead chats because of this. So yeah, I can attest that intentionally being excluded sucks.
I love listening to these while I do my work. I hope u keep them up❤💗
I love the addition of the good stories also. TTRPGs are a lot of fun and its nice to highlight that!
This series has become one of my favorites
You two together make me smile for some reason, or maybe no reason at all.
Bait! Love Dragon Prince. I can also say that I have been in that position of exclusion (not in Dnd, thankfully) but as a kid I was excluded from the rest because of my Autism. This does indeed suck and has stayed with me for a long time, so to see someone who is Autistic do this to someone else is just not the correct way of living your life. Just because this might've happened to you and you felt excluded, you cannot intentionally exclude others with malice or you are no better than those that do it to you.
That story at the end with the hand reminds me of a session where we defeated an enemy with a fancy hat, and I wanted his hat. The dm said that the hat would not come off his head no matter what we did. We tried destroying the head so that the hat would be free, but nothing worked. When we asked why, he cryptically said there was a reason for it and refused to elaborate, so we began using the head as an unbreakable puzzle solving tool, but the moment we tried (I think I attempted to use it to block an attack or trap) the whole thing disintegrated, hat and all. So I was denied a hat, and the opportunity to be a sick little freak and use a murdered enemy's skull as a prop. To this day, our best guess was that it was a lich or flaming skull or something that resurrected itself (I'm not up on monster abilities) and that made it a magical object that was indestructible under some line of text.
I don't play TTRPGs, but I do watch a couple of channels.
In the first horror story I'm glad you brought up character arcs as those can be very important to the overall campaign. I know having to pay was an issue, but it would have been interesting to know how it all played out.
The 2nd horror story was interesting. It isn't uncommon for people who feel left out or are actively excluded (as is the case with racism) to have their own groups or activities that kind of correspond to those of the dominant group. It sounds like this wasn't the case. It sounds like a case of "you won't do things my way, so I don't like you."
I do love the addition of fun stories between the drama.
My favourite story I have from my group is when, instead of simply fighting a beholder, we travelled all the way to first sigil (we based there) and then to the city of brass instead. We wanted to make the cave where the curse taken the form of a beholder was lairing collapse. Since this was in a magical palace thing, we needed some extra strong explosives. Therefore, we went to the city of brass in hopes of getting a fire elemental. Since the efreet tend to prefer selling non-fire elementals this was a bit hard to do. So first we had to get lodging so as to not be captured and sold into slavery in the first place. Then we eventually got told that we couldn't buy one, BUT there was a criminal who we could keep if we could capture him. So we did what would later be our signature move (We actually used that later to both take over a kingdom (some dwarf thought one of our party members was their king, but that's a story for another time), and as our final adventure take down (read take over and vassalize) the red wizards of Thay (they were threatening our kingdom, yet another story for another time)), we pretended we were part of their religious crime group so we could sneak into their floating pyramid temple. So this worked. Yeah, we got an audience with the biggest fire elemental ever and a sleeping mummy. We used the iron flask we got from law enforcement on the elemental, and I can't really remember the mummy. All I know is we left no witnesses.
Then once we eventually returned, we let the fire elemental loose into the beholder's lair and sealed up the entrance behind us. So combat was basically over in one turn and a bit of waiting. (That Iron flask was actually really useful, we managed to use it to free a couple and even befriend one fire elemental later on in Thay. Our friend even let us turn him into an Iron Golem, we stayed friends right up until the end of the campaign.)
Now you may wonder why did you go through all that effort to kill just one beholder? It's a difficult task for sure, but were you that scared? Well no. Being a mainly magic party with no non-magical ranged options(A cleric, a warlock(me), and a monk(not yet as OP as he later would be), it certainly was intimidating. But our main concern was time. We only had 2 hours to play each week! We couldn't just rush into combat! It would take way too long! Think about all the real estate we could get in the meantime! (We actually did look into buying some real estate in the city of brass, but we chose just to rent it instead. Too expensive, too much time.).
So that's how we spent about a month or two going to the elemental plane of fire, capturing a fire elemental crime lord, just to save time not fighting a beholder.
Great video! you guys are the best!
The 'autism' story hit home. I've been that one left out of groups in my life. So I really felt for botht he op of the story, and you Duke. I'll tell you this. If you two ever want to join my home game with my friends, I'll bring out a chair for you and Amy. Keep on with the great vids and good advice.
That second one. That's when the DM is forcing you to be a murder hobo 🤣🤣🤣
I really love that format of Reading D&D Reddit Stories!
My first time playing DND it was a one-shot that was not roleplay-heavy, it was mostly combat and a puzzle, and tbh I feel like that is a good way to introduce DND to a brand new and not very overtly sociable player, that way they get the feel for interactions without feeling left out. Then they can slowly be eased into the natural flow of rp while not feeling left out, since everyone gets a turn in battles that last more than 1 round.
I feel that 2nd one: I had been running a game when one of my players began a new game halfway through the current game... etc. etc. they invited most of the current group to their new game, at the same time, but one player and myself were excluded. Talking is golden.
I’m playing a campaign where my character is in the spotlight most of the time for two reasons. 1: my quest brought everyone else together. 2: of the four players, only two of us actually speak to npcs, my blood hunter, and the warlock.(The Kenny rouge uses sign language, and the paladin dosent like people). And 3: my characters is the only one who is friends with the other characters in the party, as despite them meeting be coincidence, he still tries to get to know the others. Despite this, each character gets their own focus, and in ways only they can. Being the main one to talk and make decisions for the entire party is new for me, and when I asked the other players they said they were fine with it as I did try and push for their own stories myself.
Aaahhh. A new dose of ttrpg drama. I'm all in.
Really like the uplifting stories in here, a very welcome palate cleanser
I think we need the names of this "group" who claim "inclusion" but point their nose to the sky when they don't want anyone who doesn't fit with them.
There are a couple I can think of.
I started dming finally. I decided to do text based so it’s more accessible for the people in the group.
I actually plan to run the first game for a different group in a voice chat at some point.
My husband and I were invited to play DND in a large group of people (8-9 people) in our apartment complex and friends of friends. The campaign was fun at first, but due to several issues (both in-game with players which we tried to address, and IRL craziness) we missed a few sessions. We found out about an evil pirate campaign that the rest of the people in the group had started while we were gone, and we were told we couldn't be in it because they didn't want the group to be too big. The worst part was the fact that not too many days later, we were told by a couple friends of ours that they had been invited to join the evil campaign... Being rejected sucks big time, no matter where or who it comes from :(
Here for the Dragon Prince references!
It was my 2nd time playing dnd, i was a tortle druid named oogua (i was also extremely comfused). The land was plunged into a forever winter and me and my third level party had to travel up a mountain to find the sorce of the snow. About half way up the mountain my party incounters a yeti and a couple other goons who instantly start to attack and after fighting a little, my dragon born companion who is right behind me, decides to sprey acid breath over me and the yeti killing us both (somehow i failed all my death saving throws).
wow, caught this in the first minute it was live !
similar story to the first one for me, but not a pay to play game. The DM was my brother in law, favoring the character his wife, my sister, was playing. Throughout the session, he mainly focused and dmed to her. Didn't direct much towards the two other players at the table which was me and our mutual friend.
After about an hour of just watching and listening to everything my sisters character was doing, I attempted to try to get some story for myself or the other player, but it was very little story before going back to my sister.
I get the favoritism because obviously he likes my sister more than me, but I didn't appreciate being side lined. We even played a second session and the same thing happened again. It was almost exclusive to that campaign though and when asked on a more personal note why he was ignoring us in the campaign, he just said 'we weren't doing much'. My sister did try to help at times, being like 'you can move onto the others now' but again, he barely did much with either me and the other player before going back to my sister. That only lasted two sessions because us two excluded people didn't want to play something where we were just watching two people roleplaying to each other.
This DM btw often claims to be a professional, disses anyone else who DMs when they do something he doesn't agree with (backseat dming), and had a group of friends he dmed for every week before he married my sister. As far as I know, he didn't have any issues with his previous group, but would sometimes get annoyed and mention doing a tpk to those players when talking to my sister.
22:01 I WARNED YOU MAN
Oh cod, Duke. I'm so sorry :'c
As someone who's gone through many similar, I relate way too hard and wanna cry now.
I just had my first DnD session last week (like very first time ever). We're playing in a group of 7 or 8 players (all family btw), all newish to DnD with a fairly new DM. I had a ton of fun on my first session of my first dnd game... even if my first character died halfway through the first session.
As it was my first time playing DnD, I made my first character a joke: Kenku sorcerer, can't read, 13 str, con, wis, dex, 8 int, and 7 charisma. Needless to say, I wasn't expecting him to live for very long, especially since I was playing him annoyingly.
Now, this is the second session of the campaign but it's my first session. Everyone else in the group already played a session to introduce them to how DnD works (I was not invited to this introductory session because they all thought I had played before.) So the group is coming back to town, they enter a tavern where my character gets introduced to the group, I immediately attempt (and fail) to steal the circlet off of the warlocks head. After getting caught, the warlock gives me a rose quartz gem (I do not know why). Since my joke Kenku got rewarded for attempted theft, obviously he'd try again. Tried stealing the circlet again, failed again, got rewarded AGAIN. The next morning, the group heads out to deal with something and I tag along, just following the person who gave my kenku shinies. Two days of travel and another failed theft attempt later, we reach the cave. While the group is chatting about how to proceed, my Kenku spots something shiny fly by his head and enter the cave. Obviously my Kenku immediately gives chase, running for the shiny, straight into a blade trap. I narrowly and unknowingly avoided being sliced into two when I reached the shiny spoon. I was then told that the swinging blade was shiny so my kenku had to chase it before it started it's backswing straight into me. Afterwards, the barbarian of the group goes in and drags my dead body out in three separate pieces. The warlocks reclaims the items they gave me, a ranger takes one of my arms (I do not know why), and the warforged takes my backpack filled with broken glass.
In short, my joke Kenku died due to a shiny spoon thrown by a group member (the ranger that took my arm). It was super fun and I had a great time, I just hope my undead tabaxi fighter survives longer.
I had a funny session that I was DMing (New DM) where I set the initial starter quest for the campaign to rescue a Barron's daughter from a horde of gobins in their cave. As the party was sneaking into the cave our druid (who was playing as a pesemistic druid that can't stand wildlife desides to enslave a squirrel to scout out ahead and report back to see the positioning of the goblins and how many. I had the druid roll for stealth and the squirrel got a Nat 20. I descibed the squirrel running through the beginning part of the cave imagining the james bond theme song and successfully describing the surroundings. After clearing the entry of the cave he sent him back out again in the next segment of the cave. The squirrel was not as stealthy this time. I rolled a D20 to see if the squirrel successfully find information. It rolled a 12. Being in the middle range I decided the squirrel would get chopped in half and crawl back to the party, cursing and yelling at the druid. Filling his mission describing the next corner, and promptly dies. To which the Half orc in our group keeps the half of the squirrel. Later during a rest he cooks the squirrel half and eats it as a snack. Later after duking it out with more goblins. He finds the other half on a goblin and takes it into his inventory. Snack for later.
To me it reads like the two players that got all the attention in the first story is most likely the DM's friends.
After being excluded like that, it feels like "Everyone is welcome here. Except you specifically. F you, go away."
Man My PTSD I had a friend group who I was playing with but they said I sucked at DND and role playing they were bout to drop the campaign so they can start a new one with out me. It still stuck with me and to this day I don't think I'd ever play as a player anymore. Which sucks but man being friends with people and genuinely like playing with them just for them to talk in the shadows and not like playing with me and me finding out in different means sucks
I tried to sneak a glass sword from a crate and rolled really bad. Our sorcerer cast prestidigitation to make the NPC crap their pants to distract, and at the same time our witch flashed the NPC. The DM almost fell out of his chair laughing.
18:38 aweee, poor Duke
I have a d&d online group with my friends and one of those friends is a new player, he came to our group like, 2 or 3 months, he's on my campaign and unfortunately have that protagonist complex, but I try to be the most forgiving me as I can, because if it's not like that I probably had kicked him of the group in no time, he has like 5 strikes right now, and y'know that 3 is the number of strikes you get to get out, yeah... I'm trying here
Right as they told the funny story with Oliver, I got a Base Paws cat DNA test add. And the cat's name... was Oliver 😂😂
I played myself for years, before - this year - I tried to DM for the first time. I already had a world build that I was using for a book I'm writing and an Idea how to let my players burn it to the ground (accidently of corse) ... so ... I asked my old friends if they would like to go on an adventure with me. They where all in the same second. As I told other friends about it they where like: "Hey I never played, I always wanted to try, is there space left?". In the end I had 7 players and I know that is much, but we made the characters together, I prepared the first adventure and yes, they came into my living room and we had 2 days of fun. It was a blast. I tried to give everyone spotlight and opportunity to get to know each other, because some of my friends didn't knew each other yet. In the end we had 3 experienced players and 4 newbees. I was SO happy they got along, had fun and stuff and I notices I LOVE to be a DM. Maybe the little sadistic in me, I don't know. Anyway: we are now into the 4th adventure ... my group normaly consits of 5-6 players now which was anticipated ... next round is today. Can't wait!
Story 2. As someone who is pre-diag. as an adult Aspy (put that for context) this offends me. I understand there is a different thought process and how something is explained to one person may not come out or be understood the same way as intended to someone "on the spectrum" (Hate that phrase) but then they went out of their way to exclude the person. Okay, it happens, but then they lied about it and slandered the person. Just because you are "unique" does not give you carte blanche to dictate or manipulate others.
Communication would have been key here. At the least, the person should have told the new group/game that they did not invite the other person because they did not like them or did not enjoy playing the game the same way the first person played it. It is okay to just back out of a group if you do not enjoy it anymore.
That second story is like noticing that there is a second group chat of your friends, just without you.
For the first story, I have a GM who gets the players to play the NPC's in extended scenes that focus on only part of the party - the first couple of times you do this is feels a bit odd but it can be very fun & liberating & our games now have a lot of npc's that really came to life through that storytelling technique. I've never quite experienced any other GM do this before - it's not always perfect but its much more fun than sitting there for a ages waiting to do something.
I know the pain of the being excluded one where some of my friends would all do a dnd game without me and I would only find out later on when they keep talking about moments from it😢
As for the first story, I have a personal rule, rp can be turn based. Take a break from each player during rp to ask input from all players. Go around the table, then pick up where left off. Then repeat. I guarantee you're players will remember where they are at, even if you lose the plot. The point is, keep everyone doing something. Or at least give them the chance, if they do nothing, it's by choice.
There's so much wrong on display here about the story about excluding people. The fact that no one "really" sees exclusion as the bad horrible thing it is, no matter who it is. Not just the story about the non-autistic friend being excluded by the autistic friends. But also when Duke starts telling his own story. He's CLEARLY upset about it, but still feels as if he needs to not point out how SERIOUS it is and how bad it can affect someone for a LONG TIME. Made even worse by the fact that, while I know she didn't mean anything bad about it, Wife is listening her husband talk about something that still bothers him to this day and she's LAUGHING at him and even doing "her part" to make light of his event DESPITE him talking about how mad it made him and for how long it truly upset him.
IKR? In my experience the people who carry on about being "tolerant" and "inclusive" and wanting equality are in fact the most hate-filled, bigoted, intolerant exclusive people on the planet.
This is going to be great
It's one thing for everyone to wonder where someone is and find out that they were left out, but as someone who got caught in the middle of SEVERE drama involving one toxic member that everyone else was quietly avoiding, I can see some folks being able to explain why they'd want to do that (especially if the excluded person has a hot temper).
I know that's not what happened here (literally only the one guy wanted them out), but I think there are some situations where perhaps forming that side group may be for the best.
I'm not autistic but I know the sting of being excluded from things. It sucks growing up with that mindset and hurts more sometimes as an adult too.
I too can speak from experience how much it hurts and messes with you when someone makes a game to exclude you. My housemate started up a game at our place, we played two sessions then "took a break". That break was everyone but me playing at one of the other players houses. We'd all been playing together for years as a group before this, this happened after the DM started secretly dating someone he knew I was interested in. Not saying the two events are related but not NOT saying they're related either. I have a lot of trust issues from people like this
Commiseration for everyone in the Exclusion Club- at least we can all be Included there. 🤗
My story time: don’t think I was excluded out of directed bias/spite, but there was a time where I was offered a spot in a D&D group by a friend who wasn’t as interested in TTRPG as me, yet who was still close enough to the expectant DM/players to want to play along. I accepted, though I was hesitant- friend and I had been in a rough patch for a bit by that point- and told them that it might take a little time getting the right technical setup to join their virtual table top, but definitely to keep me updated on a start date. (I have a long and known history of internet/tech issues, but I was determined to make it work.) I hadn’t yet played in any campaigns to that point, and I was pretty excited to start.
Well, maybe that hesitance showed through too much, maybe I sounded like I couldn’t pull my setup together quickly enough for everyone’s schedule, I don’t know- I’m willing to take some blame. However, I wasn’t alerted to the date of the campaign’s first session until two or three days AFTER they played it. The reason given was essentially “oh, we knew you weren’t ready anyway, so we didn’t think there was any point letting you know we started.” That was a HUGE hurt for me, because I was already having a lot of preexisting trust issues with this friend, and here I was- I admit to my shame- so pained and envious because they didn’t even CARE about tabletop yet they got to play in a campaign, and here I was being completely sidelined and rejected.
But, I’m sure it was for the best! It’s still a bit sad I couldn’t join the fun, but the campaign really never went anywhere. And, good news, me and my friend are in a better strait now, and I have new friends to play with! 😊
the everyone is welcome mindset is fine, until they meet someone that isnt welcome, ive had this experience back when i first started to play 5e, i joined a group on roll20 it was a westmarch style of game and it was fine until a few weeks in, when the main DM messaged me and said he didnt like me and just kicked me out of everything without letting me even ask why, almost made me stop playing dnd entirely.
The show ends when Amy runs out of plushies
As an autistic person, there are accommodations I ask for from my gaming group, mainly people not talking over one another because it fills my brain with broken glass, and they've been pretty good about it. OP was clearly able to accommodate two other autistic players before this guy showed up. He might well have required accommodations that the other two autistics didn't, but it doesn't sound like the conversation he had with OP about what he wanted really had anything to do with that, it all sounded like personal preferences for the style of game he wanted. Everyone has personal preferences and everyone gets disappointed when they aren't met. It doesn't automatically become ableism because you're disappointed and autistic.
And setting up a new group just to exclude one person is incredibly shitty and entitled. He's probably gone and torn the group apart because most will side with OP but his poor wife will probably feel obliged to side with him again and end up cut off from everyone else. I'm going to go ahead and assume that she dropped out when he did the first time because he threw a hissy fit, because he sounds like a controlling bastard. Throw out the whole man.
That 2nd horror story wouldn't have been quite so bad if not for the fact that it was a group literally being stolen from the person who had been running it successfully for everyone, by the one new person who was the only one who didn't like the original group's operating basis.
This is my first time watching and I love it
So glad you asked what plushy she had because I was legit like "WHERE is her plushy?!"
Here is my horror story. My usual Dm got asked to do a paid session on the weekend. The couple that asked him were excited and he planned a lot of fun things for us. Honestly, it was a blast to play. However the first couple ghosted him and he had already invited their friends in and they were excited now to. A few of us decided to join in to get the body count up. So we started playing. The sessions were well balanced and challenging but one of the new couple, the husband was become frustrated. He had some bad rolls, several of his plans didn’t work out, and the group decided do a few things that he did not want to do. In fairness, we did not veto all of his stuff but he was quick to want to go charging in macho hero style. Things started going down hill session 4. My character was a monk, very lawful neutral and the voice of reason at times. That was my role of balancing us as our in game characters were best friends. We decided to lure some guards in and get ourselves captured, it was all part of the plan. He wanted to take them all on, but there were too many. When the time came for us to pretend to get captured, he decided to cut and run causing the guards to attack us. He came back after we’re barely survived. In game, my character was angry for what he did. Out of game I was equally furious. The final tipping point was the following session when I was actually out of time, family matter. The Dm was playing my character and again this guy decided to get the guards on us. When things turned bad, he actually grabbed my character and throw him to the guards! Everyone got away but my character was dead. Even the dm was shocked by this, as were the other players. It was not the first time this guy had played like this but from what I am told he became increasingly aggressive towards the other players. Before that same session ended, he got up with his wife and left.