Separated From Wife? DON'T Follow the NO CONTACT Rule (DO THIS INSTEAD)
Vložit
- čas přidán 8. 07. 2024
- SEPARATED FROM WIFE? DON'T FOLLOW THE NO CONTACT RULE (DO THIS INSTEAD)
Are you currently in a position where you are a husband separated from wife? Are you experiencing some anxiety from being separated from your wife?
If so, you’ve probably been looking up some separated from wife advice, and probably are considering the “No Contact” rule.
So if your separated wife wants space, or if your separated wife is sending you mixed signals, is it a good idea to follow the no contact rule?
In this video, I am going to show you why the no contact rule may not be the best idea, especially when you feel the “separated from wife anxiety”, and especially when you find your separated wife won’t talk to you.
And I am going to show you what you can and should do instead.
-----------------------
💪 [FREE MASTERCLASS - SPOTS LIMITED]
Learn The Proven 5-Step Process to Empower Yourself to Rebuild Your Relationship/Marriage relationshipsmastered.com/mas...
🎁 [GET THE FREE GUIDE]
How to Properly Lead Conversations to open Up & Heal Your Partner’s Emotions
relationshipsmastered.com/hea...
🗣 [LET’S GET PERSONAL]
Interact with me on a personal level on my Facebook group:
/ 1032426806961329
• Separated From Wife? D...
#SeparatedFromWife
Hey guys! Thanks for watching and I hope that was helpful. Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 5 Proven Steps to Rebuilding Your Relationship/Marriage. (Warning: Spots are limited)
💪 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> relationshipsmastered.com/healing-partner-emotions
🗣 Join the FB Group! -> facebook.com/groups/1032426806961329/
Hi Geoffrey I just started watching you today and I love your content. I thought I was crazy for feeling the way I feel but this is helping me understand all my bad/toxic traits and now having identified them I can begin figuring out how to fix this and heal. I was wondering two things. Do you have a podcast? And if you could make a video about maybe boundaries? I mainly ask this because my boyfriend finds other women attractive and while I don't mind it does bug me everytime he randomly mentions how attractive
Another girl is I just don't see the need to mentioning it in front of me? I've complained once and he basically just told me that I needed to stop being so insecure and that hurt. I don't really look at other men the way he looks at other women nor say the things he says when he looks. I just want to understand how I can get over these insecurities and anger because it really makes me upset
Hi Geoffrey, I tried to find a video about what I need , but I can’t . 2 days ago my gf was so drunk and hv a big fight with me , hit me , hell to me . She broke up with me when she lost control . Also she block me everywhere. The next day I thought she will contact me again to ask abt what happen . But she didn’t and keep block me until now . I can understand might be she felt shame abt what she did to me . I knew she just too drunk might be also no any mmrs. I just start no contact her , not annoying her also. And wait to celebrate her BD next week . But today our fd just got her text said she has a fd just passed away , she will not celebrate her bday. What shd I do at all . I want to care about her . But that fight still don’t have result . Please ;(
Nice Video! Forgive me for butting in, I am interested in your opinion. Have you heard about - Mahorrla Girls Affairs Method (erm, check it on google should be there)? It is a good exclusive guide for getting your wife Back minus the headache. Ive heard some amazing things about it and my good mate called Gray got great success with it.
Many thanks, I have been researching "will my wife love me again" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you heard people talk about - Jenaniel Forgiveness Blueprint - (search on google ) ? Ive heard some decent things about it and my mate got excellent success with it.
Hi Geoffrey, many thanks for the advise in the video . I am heartbroken at the moment with whats happening in my relationship. I will stay strong and put your advise in to practise . I am in later life and still love my wife very much . Thankyou
I feel the issue with this is, subconsciously it leaves you in a state of wondering if she's going to come back. Which will hinder your progress.
True. I guess theres a balance to a lot of this. Gotta want it. But not enough to let you have too much hope.
My girlfriend recently left me two weeks ago, she told me she needed to heal herself and same with myself and I understood. I still have those feelings, but I did leave the door open but I fully understand I do need to change my ways in order to rebuild it the best way I can. Thank you for this series, I’m really going to intake as much of this as I can
so how did it go
i’m in a similar spot
Updates AJ
Omg same
I don’t have a GF but my wife said the same thing smh.
Geoffrey! This is brilliant! As always helping people focus on themselves and what they need to change rather than belittle your partner, always works
Right on Bill! Thanks for stopping by!
I registered for the Master Class for 23 April! I am excited to be on this journey to stay committed to bettering myself for the sake of my 15 year marriage.
Awesome Luke! Hope it was most insightful...
Just attended the masterclass and hope it was extended.I've been looking at alot of different youtube videos on how to get her back,how to communicate to your wife during a separation, what not to say and do but non of them were mind opening as this because non of them focused or gave understanding on the mindset..Thanks Geoffrey
Make your changes without telling her ...and move forward
In the case of long term relationships of two years or more where you have numerous memories, long term common friends etc, all playing an important part, this is the most sensible advice I have ever heard. No contact rule is just playing mind games especially if the both of you are accessing the same counselling advice! MSc
Glad we are on the same wavelength! There are some bad advice out there! :)
I really like this approach.. the strictly no-contact approach with my wife of 7 years didn't feel sufficient. As you point out, no-contact is more like an indicator of your acknowledgement of her desire to separate and of taking responsibility for your mistakes. It should not be used as a way to 'trick' them into feeling something and coming back when you've not made any changes and don't even know what the problem is. Excellent content as always Geoffrey!!
Appreciate the kind words David!
Fortunately I'm in a happy marriage, we're not perfect and we have our challenges but we work hard on making it work. As you said it's important not to dwell in the past but to grow and look to the future.
I wished my wife would work on our marriage with me. 🥺
You nailed it! This is level-headed and balanced advice and lesson. The approaches are putting people in a safe place yet brilliant.
The only channel with rational informative info, Thankyou Jeffrey
Your info is spot on and very helpful thank for putting this out for free to share with everyone
Hi Dustin,
Thank you for your compliment. I'm glad you found my video useful. What part of the video did you find to be most helpful in your situation?
I was separated; married 4 years. We are good friends with an argument that went bad.
I put a photo of myself on Instagram of myself and some other good looking women having (platonic) fun. When my wife saw the photo she went crazy. She later told me she felt like she’d loose me. We’re back together now.
We’re back together because I told her I want her back but I’m ready to live a life
Awesome stuff. Seems like you found the balance between being too pushy & being too aloof. :) How's the rebuilding process going so far?
Thank you Geoffrey for giving us hope again. These tips are solid!
Good to see you Jhianna! Glad this resonated with you :)
I hope I’ll never need to
Use these tips but I’ll 100% use them if I do.
Geoffrey these videos are brilliant. Give me so much direction and advice
Love it Tom, so glad you are finding them helpful.
It's crazy man I watched the wrong videos to begin with. Luckily it's not terrible right now but happy to know the right steps too. Masterclass is no joke💪
Hello, unfortunately my wife and I have separated and have only recently actually talked to one another. Beforehand, she rarely spoke to me except via text messages even when I tried sending her little good morning messages. Eventually I stopped all together. But as I listened to this particular video, I too began to understand the difference in this so-called “No Contact” rule as it relates to new couples and those couples who have decades shared between themselves. Yes, with 31 years together, I have to keep some form of contact with my wife, as we are well past the trying to make someone jealous or miss them. We have a long history and a future still ahead of us. And that’s what I need to concentrate on. Thanks again for opening my eyes. Peace.
Hi Geoffrey. Thanks so much for this. It has answered a question that I had for a while now since I started watching your videos. Everything I have watched so far has been helpful because I am at a stage now where I can be a little more honest with myself about my situation... also helps deal with anxiety in more productive ways.
Thank you for this. Totally makes sense and is definitely what I’m doing and have been doing. Appreciate you brother
Man this is really impactful going through a seperation right now and I feel lost..
I am a good man. When she asked for space I couldn’t understand what or why she was asking for. The loss nearly killed me. I have since mended so much of myself and literally leaped into eliminating neg self talk, earned certification in meditation, started a 200 hour yoga instructor course and the journey into healing myself. Now 3 months later I miss her so bad it hurts! She will not communicate with me at all. I don’t have the heart to try the “trick” her method of blackout and so on. After seeing this video, I have hope. I believe the love we share will persevere ... I really do, I just need to learn how to open the door and show her the changes are real and permanent .... see you in the seminar tomorrow, thank you for the hope.
How did it go
Any update?
Geoffrey, you're truly a master in relationships!
How I Got My Ex Husband Back........... After a year of Broken marriage, my lover left me with one kid, I felt like ending it all, i almost committed suicide because he left us with nothing, i was emotionally down all this while. Thanks to a spell caster called Dr Aguiyi which i met online who brought my Lover back to me. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet, I came across several of testimonies about Dr Aguiyi Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb,cure cancer,and other sickness, you can contact him on :(aguiyispellcaster@gmail.com)OR WhatsApp him +2348151642717 He is the best spell caster that can help you with your problems.
I love all the graphics in your videos! It helps me connect with what you’re saying verbally!
Awesome man! Thank you for noticing. Takes me a long time to edit these videos :)
Geoffrey Setiawan it pays off!
Thanks Geoffrey I see that patience and doing the work is what she's looking for. I made the mistake of saying I cant do this anymore with out respect which divorce is very touchy for my wife and that got us here that she wants to leave and do not trust me because I dangle our relationship over her head. Had no idea I was doing that until I followed your channel
This is the best one I have seen yet. Not many speak on the longer term relationships and why no contact is least effective on those terms.
Yes, I agree. Which is why I specialize in marriages and long term relationships.
This is interesting!
This is what my husband is doing to me now. And as much as I want to reconcile I'm just thinking about how badly he's been treating me and I know that if I reach out, he will feel validated, and his toxic behavior will continue to the future. So you're 100% right.
He's gone too far. He is using mind games. He's manipulating and gaslighting me. And i can't anymire. The problem is he knows I'm trapped. I have 4 kids with him and I have no where to go. So I'm just not reacting to his crap atm. I don't know how it will work out. We havent spoke in 6 days even when he comes by. So over it.
I too am going through the same with the wife, she spends weeks to a few months with our 2 oldest kids in another state, always in a bad mood when she decides to come back and visit for a few weeks, then it's back to the kids in another state. Hardly any communication from her and if I call, she is short with me. She's retired and I'm still working, and I get that, I'm nearing retirement and not sure what I'm going to encounter when I do with her. I'll see what works best.
been with my wife for 17 years. We are living together but she wants her space. I was angry and disappointed at first. Thought she was selfish. But, I've realized that I have been a jerk and set expectations for her in my mind and I would always get upset with everything she did. She finally had enough and wanted space. I miss her, but I have to respect her space and it has been changing my emotions for the good
@tranquilAmbiance I going through the same thing. My husband wanted the separation. I tried everything to reconcile with him even wrote a 7 page paper on how I feel. Nothing. He said he wanted his freedom and I did not please him enough. His toxic behavior what he is doing to me sucks and I am slowly starting to not see a future with him. He keeps doing these evil mind games with me and using me and gaslighting me. He think he is the shit now. 25 yrs wasted. And we also have one child together. Its about to be over. I am done pouring my energy to him and he keeps rejecting me.
@@aw4275 oh sis 💔 you're right, they don't care about long letters or anything thats in our hearts.
I left my husband. I made a break for it when I had an opportunity to go back to my home country with my kids. In his country I wouldn't have survived alone, there's no social security. And I couldn't leave without him approving for me to travel with the kids. Anyway, God almighty made a way out for us, I managed to convince him to let me travel with the kids. I found out he was on heavy drugs and had been spending all the money on them. He had cheated on me several times and is even engaged to the girl I found out about just before I left. She's 18 and he's 45.
What a loser. I loved him because I thought he was high value and had self respect. I've lost all love and respect after realising how badly he had been lying to me and how low he stooped. He has ten kids, all of which he does not financially support anymore. My kids haven't received a cent from him in the last two years since I travelled. Im currently seeking divorce and maintenance, set myself a lawyer back in his country. Can't stand the thought of his stupid ass.
@@aw4275 we hang on to the years we invested. But coming out of it, I guarantee you sis, your peace is worth more than anything else. I was trapped in his psychological games and his constant promises that I meant the world to him (with no action). So it took me ages to break free. And it was just seeing the depth of his lies that made me able to get away.
If your punk ass husband is telling you he doesn't want to be with you anymore, dump his sorry behind. Don't for a second give him the pleasure of seeing you needy for him.
You are hands down the best coach for men I've found, thank you for what you do
Great job, Geoffrey! Keep it coming!
Geoffrey, I can't financially commit to taking the master class, but I want to let you know that you're videos help with anxiety better than videos that focus on giving your partner ultimatums.
Hi Eric Smith,
As a reminder the free 90 min master class is completely free.
relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
Wow!! You give good advice I love it!! My husband and I are separated and I really love your approach ❤ 👍I learned so much from all your advice. Better myself is my goal that I am doing these time. You give me hope to resolve my situation with my marriage. Thank you so much for sharing.
Hi Gena,
You are welcome! Happy this video have been insightful for you🙂.
Once you follow the right processes to better yourself you will naturally heal your relationship.
We can definitely help you through our Relationships Revival program. If you’d like to learn more about it, you can begin by joining our free masterclass here.
relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
At the end of this masterclass, you will also get some information on how you can submit your application for the program.
And in case you’re curious as to how life-changing this program is, or how it is MILES beyond what other programs can offer, check out the links below!
Client Review Videos:
czcams.com/play/PLQ8tvyhQlPzsNm-vC_g_8SWGcJRngefgU.html
Client Review Screenshots:
drive.google.com/drive/folders/1Gp8UpRV9uMlFx763BfuQnEqN930FQb7b?usp=sharing
My wife separated from me 4 weeks ago. We still text and talk. We have 7 kids oldest is 11 twins are the youngest they're 4. She now says she is not interested in getting back with me and wants to move on. But I ask her is there still hope she says idk she doesn't want it and again not interested. When I pick her up from her moms house she lets me hug her kiss her on the cheek and hold her hand all day but odk if she's just doing that for me. If she's with me everything is good its when she isn't with me its bad. Her sisters I believe are maybe influencing her but I'm not sure. Today was the 1st day her going out with her sister for lunch and I dont tryst that sister. Do you believe there's still hope for us? She believes I'll go back to my old self and lie about helping with the kids and not letting her go out with her sisters. (I know that's wrong but anyone who tries to split up a family i believe they shouldn't be around them, maybe im wring thats why I'm here.) I have changed within these 4 weeks of separation. She sees i have just says its fake and she doesn't believe i love her. She feels im pressuring her to get back with me. Idk what to do I prayed and asked God for help 🥺😔
I love this guy! You're the best
I had given up all hope of reconciling with my wife after she left It has been 6 months and there has been no communication from the her I have sent her letters but received the no response I decided to not contact her again and file for divorce at the 12 month mark Your videos have inspired me you are the only person who has explained how a woman feels I will continue to write with the lessons I have learnt from you
Awesome! I am so glad I am able to provide clarity for you!
What happened? Has she returned?
Its like trying a locked box without a key. The box feels if you are too masucline, too soft, too desperate and somehow has some kind of sweetspot. Even if you open the box it might just lock again randomly.
Oh forgot to mention the box is underwater and you dont have infinite oxygen.
Fellas lets just leave all of this behind. Go work out. Just dates. No more relationships
Amazing Viv Bro! :)
Love it! Thank you.
thank you Geoffrey, it makes total sense. My Ex, gave me all 3 reason's to come back except the most important one about "changing his behavior" or working on addressing the problem...should I stay NO Contact until he realizes that he needs to change or else it'd be the definition of insanity all over again. I"ve already pointed out the reason why I walked out many times and he ignores it.
Hi Carmen -- for your specific situation, since you're in the early stages of the relationship, know that you're completely free to walk away from this relationship to a new one. This is not an advantage that married/long-term relationships often have. But I would really consult the expertise of a dating coach that would be more skilled in the dating/early relationship setting than I am!
God bless great advice!❤
Hi Geoffrey! 1st and foremost just wanna say is I love your videos! Does this work for 1 year plus relationship or only for more than 5 years or so?
I like how you make things look easy to do by laying out a plan for us in need of help to go by. I hoping for a good outcome. Thank you
Yeah boi. Best content.
I’m excited to better myself as a man and saving my relationship.
How is it going
Already did that very good content you have my friend just praying she van trust and want to grow old with me in a better relationship/marriage
Very interesting video! Thank you for sharing.
I love your videos and your advice, but I must say: no contact definitely worked for me. It worked because it gave us both the space to figure out what we want and grow. I managed to get to the point where I wanted first and after we started seeing each other and talking a month in, she was so inspired by the new me that she took up therapy, reading the books I read and she moved back in and is working side by side with me to make this marriage stronger than it ever was.
Hey man - This is great, because you actually did not do the classic "no contact" as explained in the video :)
@@GeoffreySetiawan oh wow, you replied! Probably true, regardless, your videos are the first I saw when being in the dark and it motivated me to look inside to turn things around! You're a true inspiration to me. Keep it up!
@@GeoffreySetiawan sadly, she flipped a week later and asked for divorce.
@@eugencristianudrea oof
@@onsetaugust all good, it worked out in the end. We are happily back together.
God this guy is way too good all this is helping me so much right now especially during mental health awareness
Hi Jae, happy this video has helped. Really appreciate your kind words.🙂
@@GeoffreySetiawan what would really help me is a one on one with you
Hi Jae,
We can definitely help you through our Relationships Revival program. If you’d like to learn more about it, you can begin by joining our free masterclass here.
relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
At the end of this masterclass, you will also get some information on how you can submit your application for the program.
And in case you’re curious as to how life-changing this program is, or how it is MILES beyond what other programs can offer, check out the links below!
Client Review Videos:
czcams.com/play/PLQ8tvyhQlPzsNm-vC_g_8SWGcJRngefgU.html
thanks bro your awesome
Hi sir Geoffrey,
I hope you can make a video on how to bring her trust and love back after doing something that has trigger her traumatic past
I will be truly grateful to know what to do if you make a vidoe like that
Hey Geoffrey, me and my partner have been seperated for 3 months now, i have said similar things to what you stated in this video , how do i go about the contact now ? Does a text message hurt here and there ? I have been watching all your videos and they have helped me alot to get through my days. Thankyou
Ty so much she said it wasn't all bad but bud when you said that all she would remember was the bad I was hammer down an got some face time with her she still needs time but she hugged an kissed me for the 1st time in 3 1/2 weeks
Another great video ! Does the advice in this video apply of one is separated and wife wants a divorce ?
Definitely! The whole premise here is that the more history you have, the more you need to change yourself & show her how much you’ve changed to let her know that the past does not equal the future. If you are facing the possibility of a divorce, then that's all the more reason you MUST show these insane and massive transformation.
@@GeoffreySetiawan that is where I am at.
I want us back so much but the closer I get the further she moves away and the bigger my anxiety grows
I am in a bad circle i can't find the way out even if I know which way I want to go.
So I noticed you were talking about not using no contact in something around two years or more. What if I’m in a 1 year marriage and pretty fresh relationship as well? Is no contact still bad? She’s asking for space but I’m not sure if I should tell her that I’m working on things in a not so needy way, and that I want to reconcile. Or if I should let her be for a few days or weeks to let her bring her thoughts together and so I can focus on myself.
Marriage is so hard. It's a trigger landmine... we have to work on ourselves to save it. Thanks for this video.
Absolutely!!
You can say that again 😢
Better ourself is a long process and its not just "have some fun" and show on your social media. For true it need the help of someone (thanks for your help btw) I believe your approach is very mature and healthy. And most of the time, other coachs provide a cheap solution. Thanks for this knowledge
Awesome Yas! Right on -- no cheap tricks :)
Hi! I just want clarification about contacting your partner. After you said to him about “My door is always open for you.” So from then, I’ll just wait for him to message me first in any day? I won’t message him until he does it first?
Thank you.
So as far as contact goes Geoffrey like casual contact and non related to the relationship, how should I do it ? I'm almost 6 months in we txt sometimes, sometimes we have those deep convos but most times is casual, how can I make progress whenever it's not relationship talk, since no contact won't work nor limited contact is too wise either we have 2 kids what is the best thing I can do as far as contact goes ?
I did exactly what you are saying in this video. She has reached out a couple of times. I just need to show her that I am trying to change.
this is the best advice
Love it! Thank you for your support.
So, during the time im waiting for her to reach out, should i go like for no contact? or should i talk to her for example once a week
Hi Jeffrey
You were saying Wait for her to reach out what if she dont ?
How to invite her if she need space and how many weeks pass to reach out to her?
What do you do if there's a legal no contact order in place?
What is the difference between a woman asking for space and moving to her mother to heal and deal with issues vs a separation?
Thank you
I am not in this situation but I can see how what you are saying makes sense. Hopefully I never have to apply these tactics
Exactly what i did with de 4 part... Hope it will work
My girlfriend of 3 years and a half recently asked for some space after we were arguing and she didn’t know what she wanted in life. We continued snap chatting and it’s been a little over 2 weeks now. Today I told her I respected her decision and understand she under a lot of stress and admitted my faults and that I’m here whenever she’s ready to talk. She replied with thank you and now I don’t know what to do from here
Hi Jerry b28,
Start by making the right changes, the real ones, and the massive ones.
Here is a good place to start.
relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
I'm in a really similar situation with my girlfriend. Any updates Jerry? Hope you're doing good man.
@@MGPiano619 give her the space she needs man but I did initiate a conversation with her in person after two months and we are currently at our best point.
I plan to never be in this situation but great info. Wish I knew it when I was younger.
I originally initiated a separation with my wife exactly a month ago. We both have alot of issues, but i am definitely the one who is worse and i felt at the time i didnt deserve her love anymore because I was constantly hurting her emotionally. She told me she loved me and would always be mine but she respected my decision... over the month, i rarely communicated with her, except for things about our children... 2 days ago I went to her and told her that ive thought about it and want to be with her and make things right, but as you said she already painted the future based on our past and now says shes done and wants to find herself... I think ive also made the mistake of crying and begging her after this to give us one more shot and now shes angry at me and cold and laughs at me crying... what do you think?
I tried several times to not break up but it didn’t work so I finally gave her the breakup and I’m now 2+ weeks into no contact. I’m hoping that this increases my value in her eyes and she also remembers the good times (not just the bad ones that you were saying)
Usually if a guy doesn’t make an effort there’s no going back. I pretty much am going through this now where I want to leave my husband.
@@1014perry thx for the reply.
How do it end up mate?
Hi @geoffrey. The fb group link isn't working. Can you please tell me the exact group name?
What if we are in a break right now and I haven’t had a chance to tell her that I am going to be working on myself, and that the door is open? Yesterday was the 7th day of our break. She asked for a week, and it has been a week. Friends advised, and I think you advised as well, to not call / text / etc and she will contact you when she is ready. I was thinking of sending a “check in” message like the one you described in the video. But is this redundant? Feeling a little confused on what to do. On one hand, she must know the week is over and that she can come to me. On another hand, she doesn’t necessarily know that I have been working on myself during this time. Thank you for all of you videos, they have been a great help with my anxiety at the very least.
Hi Cody,
Just like with my business I don't worry about appearing, I only focus on becoming. You see what is the point of telling you all I will make awesome content in the future and you guys should watch. I focus on making awesome content and you all will find it eventually.
This is the same approach you must takin in your relationship. Focus on making the changes, then worry about the marketing.
This is exactly what I'm going through, my partner is playing Cold and she's doing the No contact rule.
Love your teachings in all your videos Jeff. I am just a little concerned sending those words would actually give her the idea that I am OK with this Divorce she wants. I want things to work out for us. I have been a real dick with my screaming and shouting. Even went to facility to seek help. This Facility actually helped me control my anger. Now its up to me to win my family back. And i hope through your videos and also the masterclass i will attend i will be able to give you guys some positive feedback. Do i hold off sending that message till after the masterclass or do i send it now? Please advise
Hi Garreth Lombard,
The key thing to remember is acknowledgement does not equal agreement.
Watch the master class first, see you there.
On a break with my girlfriend. It’s only been 2 weeks so pretty fresh, idk if this applies to me jow but she said she wanted a break and some space for her and I to regroup our individual lives before we come back together… do I just stick to no contact? Do I only talk to her when she talks to me first? I idk if this information applies to my break…
Wisdom from a young man! Great job.. I would have done the opposite.. This makes total sense.. Thanks
Tha ka Geoffrey ive takeb your advixe and it really helps, i did the no contact and she was really mad after two days of me not reponding and ingorning her. So now shes been texting me and seeing daily. But i still need help being non controlling and trusting her and not assuming the wrose with her all the time.
Am I doing the right thing by letting her text me and being friendly with my replies. Or should I reach out at all or check in occasionally?
You are the best
I’m in a need for some personalized advice. The Facebook link doesn’t open and I cannot find the page in groups. Could someone help?
2 year relationship ended in fight she was waiting to take an exit. Broke up 2 months ago. Haven’t spoke in about 5-6 weeks. I gave her 3 weeks of space. But she didn’t respond. I only reached out 2 times during breakup 2 months ago.. Relationship ended due to communication and my neglect / reactiveness. What can I do from here? She had blocked me on all social media to stop looking at my stuff but still has my friends and family on there. 99% sure no other guy yet but I don’t want to let some other man to come in and love her how I didn’t show mine unintentionally.
Should I drop another text? I can run into he at gym but that’s about it.
She’s 27. I’m 28. Her first real relationship since she was 18… what do I do? No cheating or anything just on different pages
My girlfriend left me in December, she kept minimal contact up until the new year. After then she completely cut me out of her life. I reached out and told her that whenever she’s ready I would like to talk about things. She hasn’t reached out. Before the downfall, we had plans of getting a house and ultimately getting married
Consider yourself lucky you didn't get married!! After 17 years of marriage I'm now separating from my wife. It's costly financially and emotionally. My advice to you is move on, and when you're ready find someone way better looking, and younger than your ex.
Living well is the best revenge!!
Geoffrey great video. I would like your advice on what if the reason we separated is because she wants to work on herself to heal from her own issues? I read if you break the no-contact rule and Text daily during your break, means that you’re not dedicating enough time to this self-growth? She has depression issues and she wanted to separate but she is initiating the texts.
How did you end up mate
@@remyd1984 we’re still struggling… we moved back in together because things seemed good but then we recently separated again, all because of her issues. We trying to work through it but the cycle has repeated itself. That strike two, there will not be a third.
@@bproducer sorry to hear that mate
@@remyd1984 thanks man
My partner of 17years has asked for space, its our 17th anniversary this Tuesday am just wondering what would be the best way to play this? Do I text her about our anniversary or get her usual gifts or do I just not bother? So confused what to do here any advice would be appreciated.
Does this apply to engaged couples who lived together and moved out because spouse needed space to work on themselves?
As a woman I want to ask my partner about me having space. I told one time and he said I will just leave. I'm ready to let him go. There are five issues I have with him that never have changed, but slowly like I'm losing interest. I now want the space even more.
What about one year and 3 months? But with 2 months of total separation so a year and 2 months total? Does this apply to that? Or is that still dating especially if I hurt her so bad that she went to rebound with someone else?
My wife has left me. Took most of her clothes & most of the documents (birth certificates, kids s.s. cards) & left me with the kids. She is supposed to be on a travel assignment for work, but told me on Wednesday that she wants to separate. Then I found out that she has been seeing someone else for months. I asked her if she still loves me, she says “yes”. Asked her if she is still in love with me, she says “I don’t know”. Asked her if she loves the other man, she says that she can’t answer that either. She is focusing on loving herself. I just lay in bed & cry all the time. This pain is unbearable. I want my marriage & my family. How do I deal with this?
Keep watching my videos on managing emotions and anxiety.
any updates?
Everything in this video makes so much sense but how do I reach out when my wife has blocked every single channel of communication?
Hey Geofferey what if our partner doesnt want any contact right now. So i am forced to do the no contact. And I am trying my best to give her space.... As she does'nt want any contact right now....
Without the full context, do take my advice with a grain of salt.
First thing - how do you know it’s time to give up or if there is hope? I always say that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. If your partner is still angry & upset at you, then ironically, that still means you have lots of hope. It becomes hopeless only when she is completely indifferent to you. But of course, this is not black and white, but should give you an idea on where you fall in that spectrum.
If you think there is hope, then yes this definitely still applies. The whole premise here is that the more history you have, the more you need to change yourself & show her how much you’ve changed to let her know that the past does not equal the future.
@@GeoffreySetiawan thank you geoffrey. Yes i know there is a big hope and she is not upset but so pissed off right now thats why she does'bt want to have any contact with me. She needs space so badly that sge even unfollowed me on insta because sge was seeing me all over her timeline and ok if she needs space then i am giving her best from my side but also i m working on improving myself for the future...
Hi bro you speak well i like it,
But would you please advise me? what can I do she left 2 weeks 2 ago and told me never ever should I call her. svevera times when ever we got an argument she could say so. After all what she has put me through.😢 .yes am not perfect i know somehow am wrong the way i could handle the conflict home sheleft and said i should not call .
What should I do?😢
Hi Jeffrey
Why only us need to change ?
Why is it Not Her that choose to break up?
Is she at Fault to initiate the breakup?
Should we even forgive her for breaking the relationship?
Any difference for this approach if this separation is wanted from your male partner in the relationship?
Not really! It's going to be the same for males or females!
Geoffrey Setiawan Thank You. These videos are a refreshing light to what seems like an endless dark tunnel. 🙏🏻👍🏻
We’ve been dating for 10 months then can I use the no contact with my bf?
Geoffrey, Thank you for this video. I am having an issue whereby my wife filed for divorce on 9/7 and I have had a massive 180 change from that point. Working on creating emotional safety etc. My wife got to a point where she was willing to try a night together every dew days, but she said the pain was too great seeing this new me versus her past pains of who I was. She has since erected more boundaries to help protect herself and we are not doing nights together with the family any more. I have 10x'd everything and I think that's making it feel extremely uncomfortable for her because its incongruent with her lived past of 13 years of marriage. Is this the paradox of change?
Could be - but when my clients 10x, whenever they get resistance via POC, they are always able to say precisely the right WHAT, with the right HOW, and the right WHY (Intentions) to turn that into an opportunity to plant seeds.
We cannot just become 10x and expect our partner to understand that without planting seeds.
Did we do that?
And how are we so sure we've 10x'ed? By what criteria? By what standards?
@@GeoffreySetiawan the 10x has been a mix of a lot of low level value things you have mentioned, but were very important to her (she has adhd) before in a home with 3 young kids (rising early, taking kids to school, doing HW, cleaning entire home, all the chores, saving money, stopped drinking completely, lost 60lbs) - But more importantly the bottom pillar of emotional safety component of being active listener, not judging, leaning into her interests etc.
She keeps making statements like "no one can change that fast," and "it's not healthy to change that fast," or "This is everything I have ever wanted" Yet she feels the need to place firmer boundaries for her mental well-being.
I think I need the tools to plant those seeds like you said. My lawyer mind is always very paradox of logic oriented, and I have thrown that in the trash.
This is a 13 year marriage with laziness on my part, spending money issues on car parts / materialism, and lack of me approaching her or leaning in to her emotions.
Your masterclass was great and I learned a lot - I think I am very close to setting up my appointment call.
How do i do this if her posting on facebook that she has someone new but she faking it?
Coach please Go through my issue is not really a long story
what should I do ? after know contact for 30 days. She give me a Mixsinger. Then I ask her if we can spend sometime the day she meet me in church.. But that night was really not good. Because i had a drink then I started bring the pass issues and i started arguing with her. So we started having issues again then I keep calling her again after that day too much. Then she started pulling away from me again. So I decided to told her if that's the case am done as well. Because she now disrespecting me. When I told her that have accepted the break up that am not going to border her again. But she couldn't look me in the face. she feels weak and didn't say anything. I still love her. The way will start. She a stubborn one even when we're together. What is the way out. ? She was really in love with me before this. She was testing with different ways but I did not notice she was testing me
Could you please tell me whether six months relationship is long term relationship? We’ve been together for only a few months but we’ve been seeing future with each other.
No it’s not.
are there exceptions to leaving her alone? should I reach out to wish her a happy birthday or anything?