3 Quick Tips To Overcome Social Anxiety

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  • čas přidán 5. 06. 2024
  • Are you shy? Discover how to not be shy in social situations within 60 seconds of first feeling it.
    Get our best tip to turning on confidence in just 60 seconds:
    goo.gl/lka4SA
    This is video on overcoming shyness will be useful to you if you have had the experience of getting locked up in your head in a social environment. You go from feeling comfortable and fine in one group to suddenly not knowing what to say. You draw a blank and when you can think of something, it’s just stupid and goes over poorly. Your hands don’t feel right anywhere.
    So you don’t wind up hesitating and missing out on opportunities a networking events with new friends or even a first date.
    Overcome Social Anxiety and Shyness by:
    0:45 Stop trying to do anything and just exist (free yourself)
    2:45 Overcome your shy voice that is in your head
    5:30 Prepare for interaction to free yourself from social anxiety
    7:30 An easy sentence to break through your shy pattern
    Subscribe to Charisma On Command: bit.ly/subscribeCOC
    Connect With Us.
    Website: www.charismaoncommand.com
    Facebook: / charismaoncommand
    Periscope: @Charismaon
    Or if you want to see my personal stuff (my regular life + me playing music):
    Instagram: @CharlieHoupert
    Periscope: @CharlieHoupert
  • Jak na to + styl

Komentáře • 6K

  • @eliezerzimet3307
    @eliezerzimet3307 Před 5 lety +11706

    My problem is more that I don't actually have anything to say....

    • @friedbraincells9414
      @friedbraincells9414 Před 5 lety +1604

      I relate to this on so many levels like are we the same person.

    • @shaziaayub3256
      @shaziaayub3256 Před 5 lety +1734

      Same with me, in my geography class I sit next to this boy and my crush sits behind him and I'm just silent for the whole lesson cause there's no one to talk to, and I can't start a conversation. And even teachers ask me a question I panick and just mummble and everyone starts taking about me, everyone knows I'm the shy Lonley girl, but at home I'm like a boss I'm so load and crazy, I'm a different person at home and a different person at school. I wish I could fit in, #shy Squad

    • @briahershey3822
      @briahershey3822 Před 5 lety +142

      SAME

    • @Adam-xd8df
      @Adam-xd8df Před 5 lety +201

      Then dont agree with people opinion all the time I have the same problem

    • @comradesam3382
      @comradesam3382 Před 5 lety +29

      This

  • @scarlotraven6193
    @scarlotraven6193 Před 5 lety +11031

    I wish I was as socially confident as my dog.

    • @narasimhahm321
      @narasimhahm321 Před 5 lety +34

      @@jlinus7251 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @LalisaManoban-qp4wt
      @LalisaManoban-qp4wt Před 5 lety +14

      @@jlinus7251 😂😂😂😂

    • @cinesterg6444
      @cinesterg6444 Před 5 lety +70

      Take some actions bro no one said you can't be socially confident!

    • @heatherg1296
      @heatherg1296 Před 5 lety +65

      Lol if that was your opener to me irl, I'd be your friend lol.

    • @janina873
      @janina873 Před 5 lety +3

      Scarlot Raven 😁

  • @noone-re3zp
    @noone-re3zp Před 5 lety +5060

    i once heard someone say “ppl aren’t thinking of that embarrassing thing u did. everyone is too busy thinking of the embarrassing things they did.”
    and ever since then, everytime i do smth embarrassing, i tell myself that and i kinda feel better:D

    • @castitatis3976
      @castitatis3976 Před 5 lety +160

      I always care about what other people do and secretly cringe

    • @castitatis3976
      @castitatis3976 Před 5 lety +60

      But it doesnt change anything,you dont have to appeal to everyone

    • @xhmbx9548
      @xhmbx9548 Před 5 lety +100

      @@castitatis3976 well then you suck!!
      Cringe on this 😂😂😂

    • @crzydwrf5876
      @crzydwrf5876 Před 5 lety +41

      I actually thought like this too even in real embarassing moments, and like 3 years after i just realize it was actually embarassing and keep thinking about it lmao

    • @castitatis3976
      @castitatis3976 Před 5 lety +4

      @@crzydwrf5876 ahhaha

  • @sarah-dq5rl
    @sarah-dq5rl Před 4 lety +3684

    It's so annoying when people say, "That's the most I've heard you talk before." I really try so hard to be more social, but I just can't. 😟

    • @frankiemffocean
      @frankiemffocean Před 4 lety +277

      Ikr i just say "i talk i just dont talk to you" and most of the time they stand there in silence and being awkward. Im working on being more confident. Being social was really hard and is still hard for me, but you got this and i believe you can overcome this💛

    • @sarah-dq5rl
      @sarah-dq5rl Před 4 lety +28

      @@frankiemffocean Thank you.

    • @tasoskarampetsios8310
      @tasoskarampetsios8310 Před 4 lety +35

      Since I'm being told that a lot especially by people who don't know me that well I can tell you that it's a pretty good set-up for you to say something funny to keep the conversation going so I really haven't had a problem with that you can try it

    • @anilliteratefuck4747
      @anilliteratefuck4747 Před 4 lety +82

      I know every time I’m with my mom if I do anything like say something a little bit quiet and a person goes say that again, my mom will go sorry he’s shy. And that messes with my head so much and then I feel even more self conscious about it.

    • @nicolecastro6714
      @nicolecastro6714 Před 4 lety +22

      istoleyachristmascookies yes,just because I don’t talk to you doesn’t mean I don’t talk,like you feel more comfortable talking around other people than the rest

  • @greenhound
    @greenhound Před 7 lety +6608

    0:08 "this is gonna be useful to you if you've ever been out"
    *oh ok*
    *closes video*

    • @CaliforniaChurro
      @CaliforniaChurro Před 7 lety +53

      greenhound lol ikr

    • @Lunk42
      @Lunk42 Před 7 lety +17

      greenhound Lol I haven't been out either.

    • @justcr00z1ng3
      @justcr00z1ng3 Před 7 lety +13

      XD nice. That's exactly like my xD

    • @stickbodybighead
      @stickbodybighead Před 7 lety +18

      greenhound I am such Ginny Weasley in chamber of secrets when she first meets Harry. I have the same exact problem just with stage fright

    • @janisberzins2703
      @janisberzins2703 Před 7 lety +4

      Out? Like knocked out? I have never been too, but I did landed some sweet knockouts. Why suddenly he started to talk about shyness? I mean, wtf?

  • @apenafitshop3022
    @apenafitshop3022 Před 7 lety +6106

    this is how i defeated shyness: life is short

    • @kampakidd9727
      @kampakidd9727 Před 7 lety +248

      Expose Child that is effective

    • @trollvidde
      @trollvidde Před 7 lety +93

      life is too short for memes

    • @gautekjelstadli553
      @gautekjelstadli553 Před 7 lety +159

      Nothing is too short for memes....

    • @gautekjelstadli553
      @gautekjelstadli553 Před 7 lety +34

      except for your "business"
      (p*enis, if you wondered...)

    • @stef3927
      @stef3927 Před 7 lety +41

      Expose Child yeah, and the quote "you only live once" xD

  • @mandymoe12
    @mandymoe12 Před 4 lety +1675

    What really chokes me up is when I'm in a social situation and I feel like I'm doing really well... And then somebody calls me out for being 'too quiet.' I almost never recover from that.

    • @elissavetargiriou2407
      @elissavetargiriou2407 Před 4 lety +84

      I feel you...

    • @omidijioyinkansola
      @omidijioyinkansola Před 4 lety +105

      Well everyone has their own opinion. and that shouldnt limit what you feel about yourself, you are bold confident and strong even in your silence. Never try to be like anyone else be you and improve on being the best of you.

    • @neverstopaskingwhy1934
      @neverstopaskingwhy1934 Před 4 lety +42

      ur putting there opinion about u on a pedestal think about how much u value other over urslef

    • @brinplsplsplstextme-jaiden7223
      @brinplsplsplstextme-jaiden7223 Před 3 lety +22

      What I do is make a joke around it.However way someone calls you out for being quiet, everyone’s attention diverts towards you. So take the opportunity to be funny, have a laugh about it.

    • @kassard1
      @kassard1 Před 3 lety +8

      I had to learn to throw wit at those kind of comments.
      Sometimes, depending on who said it, I would say I was absorbing all the information everyone revealing about themselves for future use and then give an arched eyebrow and an evil grin.
      Later when I became more confident and loud people would comment when I went quiet asking if I was okay, "yeah, I'm just being quiet to freak ya'll out."
      Again depended on the person who makes these comments, friends who KNOW you know it's anything they need to bring to your attention, people that mostly say these thing are saying that THEY are uncomfortable with your quietness and that's THEIR problem, not yours.

  • @dr.oxygentekseng8062
    @dr.oxygentekseng8062 Před 4 lety +1549

    I can't even poop when someone standing outside my bathroom door

    • @roshi1645
      @roshi1645 Před 4 lety +148

      DR. oxygen TeXseng I can’t even go toilet when someone is at my house, or I’m at someone’s house , I get so shy I just wait till they leave

    • @snowflake8629
      @snowflake8629 Před 4 lety +43

      OMG ME TOO😂😂😂😂😂😂😭😭😭

    • @skkzzzz
      @skkzzzz Před 4 lety +18

      SAMEEEEEW

    • @sey8893
      @sey8893 Před 4 lety +9

      DR. oxygen TeXseng , i relate so much

    • @itskylierae
      @itskylierae Před 4 lety +9

      OMG SAMMEEE😂

  • @RufaelSolo
    @RufaelSolo Před 7 lety +2007

    How I overcame shyness.
    1) No one cares if you're cool or uncool. They got themselves to care for.
    2) Everyone is anxious about something and that gave me a major relief about mine.
    3) Just talk your mind out. it's a burden if you didn't.

    • @bstandsforbuilding5567
      @bstandsforbuilding5567 Před 7 lety +44

      8) Bip boppity oodele goo.

    • @RufaelSolo
      @RufaelSolo Před 7 lety +86

      9) Hakuna Matata

    • @RufaelSolo
      @RufaelSolo Před 7 lety +38

      +Alexander Delarge 12) People who care about who's gay or not are probably gay themselves.

    • @chris-ws7fb
      @chris-ws7fb Před 7 lety +14

      lol you say that like being gay is bad
      don't trigger people

    • @danethenice
      @danethenice Před 7 lety +52

      +SeagullG don't be so negative about your sexuality man.

  • @PlanetYokoshima
    @PlanetYokoshima Před 5 lety +2917

    I am greatly confident with shy people. So greatly. But with confident people I shrink.
    What I do is I imagine anyone I am socialising with is shy. Therefore I'll feel the need to listen to them and help them feel accepted. After all, everyone fears to be judged. It's not only you, it could be the person you are planning to approach themselves.

    • @kime5776
      @kime5776 Před 5 lety +119

      Woahh, I always have the exact same issue, thanks for the tip!

    • @aimeeastorga210
      @aimeeastorga210 Před 4 lety +86

      I Thought I was the only one Lol, Tbh a lot of my friends are introverts and I become confident when I'm around them. Lmfao xD
      I can do a lot of craziness/wildness since they got mah bacccc ~ ^^

    • @esther9210
      @esther9210 Před 4 lety +33

      I’m the opposite. When ppl are talkative, it causes me to become talkative

    • @mallorielouann546
      @mallorielouann546 Před 4 lety +24

      Wow, I am the same way. This comment just opened my eyes. I had no idea that others are like that around people too. I am going to try and convince myself to get into this mindset. Thank you.

    • @marinasironiabad4207
      @marinasironiabad4207 Před 4 lety +5

      Oh good I relate to that in a whole other level,also if there is a group of 4 people I stress easily because I’m quiet.

  • @KeyEpic
    @KeyEpic Před 3 lety +2000

    Confidence is literally a mindset that you can force

  • @aconfusedalien1491
    @aconfusedalien1491 Před 4 lety +1199

    I talked to a stranger yesterday while in the elevator. No kidding i feel really proud about that. Slowly but surely cracking that shell!!😁

    • @spiritoftherain5852
      @spiritoftherain5852 Před 3 lety +60

      If that would be me I would pass out on that elevator

    • @enniswhalen2428
      @enniswhalen2428 Před 3 lety +11

      BWN - Great that you felt some sort of progress, but, please, be careful . . . .

    • @spiritoftherain5852
      @spiritoftherain5852 Před 3 lety +4

      @@enniswhalen2428 THAS IMPORTANT

    • @nikfarah9036
      @nikfarah9036 Před 3 lety +39

      social anxiety club : we are proud of you

    • @sonicfx5431
      @sonicfx5431 Před 3 lety +1

      @@enniswhalen2428 what do you mean? Like seriously I'm interested

  • @TomEpQm
    @TomEpQm Před 7 lety +2229

    It's actually amazing to find someone on CZcams giving advice that doesn't feel like they're talking out of their ass and really makes you feel like you're walking away with useful information.

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  Před 7 lety +310

      Appreciate that!

    • @noneofyourbusiness8252
      @noneofyourbusiness8252 Před 7 lety +43

      Tom!? Agreed. I can't tell you the amount of vacuous crap found in many educational/instructional/motivational youtube channels. Stuff like: "Tip #1: Greet people with a smile." Charisma On Demand will sometimes tell you the obvious but will also put it into context and explore the subject with more depth. I appreaciate that it analyses the mindsets behind these issues of shyness, lack of confidence and self esteem. Great channel.

    • @pushpas.6679
      @pushpas.6679 Před 6 lety +2

      Tom!? ,search alpha m, 👊

    • @amaracea
      @amaracea Před 6 lety +6

      Tom!? Is that you Tom!? omg!

    • @BLMeredith87
      @BLMeredith87 Před 6 lety +4

      coltonw83 jr. Problem with Alpha M is his videos are guaranteed to have huge waffle about sponsors, sometimes you can just tell instantly his videos were made just for his newest product plug.

  • @isabellab7326
    @isabellab7326 Před 6 lety +3836

    The more people who call me shy or ‘quiet’ the more I act that way. It’s really annoying cause I can’t control it. Like when I finally open up to someone and am talking, if they suddenly mention that I am talking for once and not quiet I will close up again.
    People always say to me
    -Omg you’re taking for once
    -The quiet girl is talking!!
    -wow you actually have a voice!!
    UGH I NEED HELP

    • @mattthegamer144p6
      @mattthegamer144p6 Před 6 lety +246

      Isabella Bedford same here I really don’t like the attention, every time I end up actually talking to someone, someone else would be like He’s actually talking

    • @princessfluffybottom1933
      @princessfluffybottom1933 Před 6 lety +153

      Exactly guys. I used to get people do that to me all the time. Just forget about all the people that you 'think' are judging you. It's all in your head, they perobably have better things to do lol. That's how I stopped feeling bad when people did it. On the other hand, it's not their intention to actually make you feel bad.
      They are probably just judgemental and ignorant. They probably judge so much that they are immune and don't realise that what they are doing is bad.

    • @doodgeslagenmug
      @doodgeslagenmug Před 6 lety +53

      Isabella Bedford same. When i said something once someone just said: it is talking. I was like :(

    • @Pau-il6mg
      @Pau-il6mg Před 6 lety +42

      OMG somone that understands me this literally happens to me since 1 grade and now I’m in 7 grade :(

    • @chiaraguillen2324
      @chiaraguillen2324 Před 6 lety +16

      So relatable hahaha

  • @liz.gracee_
    @liz.gracee_ Před 3 lety +275

    I hate it when you hangout with a group of people you know but aren't really close with, and you try to join in their conversation, but you can't relate to anything they're talking about. 😔

    • @sarahibrahim8642
      @sarahibrahim8642 Před 3 lety +8

      Your end sentence is very relatable but I never hang out with a group of people . I’m around one in my bus and at school but it’s not like they had a choice to invite me

    • @adamwyatt1902
      @adamwyatt1902 Před 3 lety +13

      Just because you don't know how to relate, you can try to understand, and that means a lot to others. Especially if owning up to not knowing much about the subject and asking them to teach me more if it's something they enjoy talking about.

    • @biollante746
      @biollante746 Před 2 lety +2

      Uhh, if you try to look at it logically (probably not what you should do in this situation but I will), If you cannot join in their conversation/ talk to them, because you can't relate to anything they're talking about, that means, if they're talking about something you CAN relate, you will be able to join the conversation/ talk to them
      Now, how do you make them do that... Bring up the topics you relate to yourself? idk
      I mean, if they're hanging out with you, that must mean they should be willing to talk to you about stuff you talk about? Ugh, the fact that you aren't really close with them is making this difficult!

    • @tfahad2051
      @tfahad2051 Před 2 lety

      If they're laughing at something, ask them to tell you that story and they'll be happy to tell you because they also want to laugh.

    • @Black.Sabbath
      @Black.Sabbath Před 2 lety +1

      @@adamwyatt1902 Why would I want to be "taught more" about pregnancy or nails?

  • @zxida7272
    @zxida7272 Před 4 lety +361

    I'm just reading the comments because it's actually helping me have confidence lol

    • @bastac2993
      @bastac2993 Před 3 lety +13

      yea it helps me see that ım not the only one xd

    • @urmomluver1169
      @urmomluver1169 Před 3 lety +2

      @@bastac2993 Gucci Gucci flip flops something something in my socks

    • @kgkomrin
      @kgkomrin Před 3 lety

      Where's that pfp from

    • @nukar5193
      @nukar5193 Před 3 lety

      Wronggggg,. the comments will make you feel okay at being shy and awkward. And if your seeing this video, I don’t think that’s what you want. You can Try this, whenever you see a comment you can maybe relate to, say to yourself I can no longer relate to this comment and then don’t like the comment at all and process what just happened😌I hope this help

    • @willtrojan8854
      @willtrojan8854 Před 3 lety

      Yeah same

  • @MinYoongi-my9wr
    @MinYoongi-my9wr Před 5 lety +4605

    I have a tip. Just don’t care what anyone thinks. When you have a thought in your head, don’t replay it over and over to make sure it’s perfect, just say it. Also, if you want to make a friend, just go for it. Who cares what they say? Who cares what they think? It’s your life. Gain confidence

    • @shaziaayub3256
      @shaziaayub3256 Před 5 lety +133

      Min Yoongi thank you, I just remember this comment and I start to be me, I'm slowly getting better, thanks so much

    • @livvy177
      @livvy177 Před 5 lety +380

      Easier said than done haha

    • @nicholasnoel01
      @nicholasnoel01 Před 5 lety +17

      yeahhh👏👏

    • @s4muraik290
      @s4muraik290 Před 5 lety +56

      You just helped me gain 3 friends in my first day somewhere new ty so much

    • @user-sx7fu5ir2f
      @user-sx7fu5ir2f Před 5 lety +111

      That works until someone actually walks up to you and says something

  • @drewstephenson8346
    @drewstephenson8346 Před 7 lety +2101

    I wasn't shy when I was younger... but all the sudden I kinda just shut myself out. Sure I'm going through that middle school time where you feel kinda insecure, but it seems worst for me. I'm basically one of the quietest people in my grade, and that has some benefits, I don't get in trouble, but my range of friends is kinda small. There's a somewhat odd group of people that I'm kinda just nice to, but when I sit with them because they seem lonely, I act like an idiot for a hour before I tell myself, calm down.

    • @midniteriko2231
      @midniteriko2231 Před 5 lety +32

      Drew Stephenson me 2 but now im anti soical

    • @swissairguh9493
      @swissairguh9493 Před 5 lety +85

      MidniteRiko I'm just to busy worrying about me and what to say I don't actually say it so most of the time i don't say anything

    • @toastaex9679
      @toastaex9679 Před 5 lety +27

      Drew Stephenson i can relate to that so much

    • @savbaddie5425
      @savbaddie5425 Před 5 lety +92

      Drew Stephenson OMG SAME. I’m just so shy. It’s hard for me to open up to anyone anymore. And the people I hang around aren’t the people I really want to hangout with. I just hang with them because I don’t want to be alone at school. Idk what happened to me. I stress because of the fact I can’t even be myself anymore💔

    • @ChapulinMarijuano
      @ChapulinMarijuano Před 5 lety +4

      Savbaddie1 Xxx same

  • @carlitosespinosa
    @carlitosespinosa Před 5 lety +5612

    “How to stop shyness in 60 seconds”
    *video is **9:45** minutes long*
    My whole life is a lie

  • @reignwest7261
    @reignwest7261 Před 3 lety +209

    “Confidence comes later, the actions of confidence come first!”

    • @skyhunter520
      @skyhunter520 Před 3 lety +7

      This is the best advise ive seen in the comments so far.

    • @xRiPw0lFx
      @xRiPw0lFx Před 2 lety

      This is fire 🔥 that was great

    • @Brah-bb8of
      @Brah-bb8of Před rokem

      @@skyhunter520 so I have to be confident before being confident

  • @thestrangefishlikeentity9967
    @thestrangefishlikeentity9967 Před 6 lety +3953

    So, my friends dared me to introduce myself to someone randomly on the street (because I'm really socially awkward) so I walked up to this girl and said, "Hey, I've never met you, you're really pretty, I'm shy, and my friends dared me to do this. Can I get your name?" Now we're friends, and I don't know how to end this comment.

    • @Spacemanfilms2002
      @Spacemanfilms2002 Před 6 lety +188

      Princess TNT are you guys more than friends

    • @RenzoIsHereYT
      @RenzoIsHereYT Před 6 lety +441

      Princess TNT your balls just got bigger in that moment

    • @glassunicorn1525
      @glassunicorn1525 Před 6 lety +88

      that's awesome

    • @siencetalk7470
      @siencetalk7470 Před 6 lety +89

      damn you have a big one there man.

    • @MrFox_Adventures
      @MrFox_Adventures Před 6 lety +40

      raggex X good luck!
      definitely can be hard to make friends if your not used to doing so.
      biggest part is the continuous effort to get out of whatever is holding you back, and getting out of the comfort zone into what is actually going to help you progress

  • @JustShotsForMeh
    @JustShotsForMeh Před 7 lety +2147

    How to stop shyness:
    Step 1. Do things that you don't do when you're shy
    Thanks professor.

    • @mathew633man
      @mathew633man Před 7 lety +241

      I don't think farting in public is such a good idea

    • @Shireen-pj7rh
      @Shireen-pj7rh Před 7 lety +8

      Good one 😁😁

    • @callum7081
      @callum7081 Před 7 lety +35

      Matt shitting in public?

    • @TheOfficialTeyloh
      @TheOfficialTeyloh Před 7 lety +78

      I think you are missing the point...you're supposed to let yourself feel shy. So you will feel really bad for 30 seconds, because you're nervous and you have to let your body process the shyness. Once you do that, you'll naturally just feel better because you know it can't get any worse.

    • @mathew633man
      @mathew633man Před 7 lety +18

      ***** i actually like your analysis.

  • @victorskov3181
    @victorskov3181 Před 2 lety +140

    “It never ceases to amaze me: We all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.”
    - Marcus Aurelius

  • @Savannahhh._.
    @Savannahhh._. Před 4 lety +1012

    I hate being shy it keeps me from doing what I wanna do in life. I wanna be a dancer but I'm shy and people are so judgy. :( I hate myself sometimes.

    • @danm1063
      @danm1063 Před 4 lety +35

      Join school clubs, any job in customer service. It'll help a lot

    • @elonstephen2321
      @elonstephen2321 Před 4 lety +10

      @Asia Brown ur nice

    • @AyamatsuSakura94
      @AyamatsuSakura94 Před 4 lety +12

      I'm dealing with that right now!!! I want to learn hip hop but I feel awful.... and old...

    • @yara4486
      @yara4486 Před 4 lety +2

      “Judgy” .... HAHAHAHAHA-

    • @Moana_moo
      @Moana_moo Před 4 lety +5

      Savannah Marshmallow i’m even more shy in social situations than on stage. Like stage is the only place i get lose. It’s just that too crowded places drain my energy. And many of my friends are so comfortable in big crowds while i love to party and dance i feel the best in a less crowded area of the club yet they want to be in the Center and it drains me...in less crowded places i am still shy but i feel more comfortable...I’m a performer though

  • @gustavsk6096
    @gustavsk6096 Před 5 lety +6419

    hamburger

  • @humudu
    @humudu Před 7 lety +2063

    Great now my boss fired me when he saw i looked like I couldnt care less during our meeting

    • @kj5960
      @kj5960 Před 7 lety +42

      IM CRYING

    • @chrissabry7529
      @chrissabry7529 Před 7 lety +87

      Then you did it wrong

    • @Whxyte
      @Whxyte Před 7 lety +30

      humudu oh hey, you might wanna try to keep an attentive face (just keep your eyes on the person speaking even as your brain blanks out, nod a bit when the person pauses to take a breathe). like charlie says, to the degree that you can. there are certainly a lot of places where you still have to be uptight, esp work meetings. however if you can tweak and see how much you can get away with, then you can slowly adjust to the lowest level of energy state in the work meeting without getting 'caught' and use it as a reset time.
      or even easier is to take a toilet break and use the time to reset a bit.

    • @oldaccount133
      @oldaccount133 Před 7 lety +38

      humudu 😂😂 Sorry, but dude, not to be mean, but that seriously made my day. Have at least a little bit more interest next time. 😉

    • @nataliecao9409
      @nataliecao9409 Před 7 lety +41

      Then ur boss sucks

  • @ellawu4626
    @ellawu4626 Před 4 lety +205

    When someone talks to me and I don’t have anything to say or relate to, so I just awkwardly laugh quietly and just stand there. Also when someone laughs behind me I always expects them to laugh at me.

    • @mohamedkerouf3601
      @mohamedkerouf3601 Před 4 lety +14

      (bad english i know) I used to be like you
      You just need to put this head in you head "nobody care's about you"

    • @mohamedkerouf3601
      @mohamedkerouf3601 Před 4 lety +4

      It helped me so much

    • @bonbonpony
      @bonbonpony Před 3 lety +5

      @@mohamedkerouf3601 Thanks, now I have depression ._.
      Just kidding ;)

    • @friendlyneighborhoodloser2639
      @friendlyneighborhoodloser2639 Před 3 lety +9

      i get like that too but what you have to realize is that everyone else feels like everyone is watching them too. everyone is so focused on themselves and their friends and their problems that they’re probably hardly noticing you. if they are noticing you, it’s most likely for a good reason. like when i notice someone it’s almost always because i like something about their appearance or outfit or whatever. they’re not laughing at you, believe me

    • @biollante746
      @biollante746 Před 2 lety +1

      @@friendlyneighborhoodloser2639 People also notice things they don't like

  • @callbettersaul
    @callbettersaul Před 5 lety +875

    His smile is bigger than my future

  • @alexandrelaflamme7332
    @alexandrelaflamme7332 Před 6 lety +1615

    how to defeat shyness :
    *L O T S O F T E Q U I L A*

    • @danielsuelzle4364
      @danielsuelzle4364 Před 5 lety +111

      this actually worked for me haha. Like I would get drunk and remember how I acted, then do the same at parties sober and I learned social skills lol

    • @desertedlandz
      @desertedlandz Před 5 lety +30

      Daniel Suelzle yo why is that smart

    • @HondaS-fk1mi
      @HondaS-fk1mi Před 5 lety +3

      YES

    • @user-yn4pu2ux5l
      @user-yn4pu2ux5l Před 5 lety +7

      2 shots of vodka

    • @maszamap3888
      @maszamap3888 Před 5 lety +4

      Little bit of drugs

  • @bangelz0949
    @bangelz0949 Před 6 lety +1405

    Step One : Reset
    Step two : Open up
    Step three : Creative in conversations
    Courage is key word

    • @ThySheepie
      @ThySheepie Před 6 lety +23

      BAngelZ 09 But you see, that doesn’t just help everyone. That comment can help people that are quite new to this, but resolutions don’t just happen as easy as this. For example, me.

    • @yingqiuzhou133
      @yingqiuzhou133 Před 6 lety +3

      Grunge Lord it is true

    • @uditchakraborty7741
      @uditchakraborty7741 Před 6 lety +1

      interesting points ,if anyone else wants to discover best cure for shy bladder try Sovallo Bladder Shy Fixer ( search on google ) ? Ive heard some incredible things about it and my m8 got cool results with it.

    • @dm7539
      @dm7539 Před 6 lety +2

      BAngelZ 09 no, save it and if you fail, load up ur previous save

    • @jimenamorote3105
      @jimenamorote3105 Před 6 lety +1

      I can’t do that

  • @raising3loricks57
    @raising3loricks57 Před 4 lety +101

    It used to bother me a lot when people say, “are you always this quiet?” or when I’m thinking I’ve been talking a lot or loud, and people say, “you are so quiet.” I’ve gotten over it. I once had a boss tell me, I need to stop being so quiet and speak up if I want to get somewhere in life. Well I’m a nurse, and my patients love me. I also have a wonderful husband and three beautiful kids. I get most of my thoughts out on my channel or through some type of social media or writing.

    • @nova.miller
      @nova.miller Před rokem

      Somebody that took some acting classes for a while said this "Our acting coach there would make us act 1 by 1 and ask us what the person's mistakes were. Everyone would say a few different mistakes. Like how they talked quite or something. And the coach would say 'there were like a 100 mistakes there. But you only noticed a few of them because you have those mistakes too" I don't know if it's true cause I actually talk pretty loud even though I'm shy but I notice when they are talking quiet

  • @FlameRaven
    @FlameRaven Před 5 lety +210

    I just don't feel like the thoughts in my head are important enough to be spoken or engaged in a conversation.

    • @taebae5410
      @taebae5410 Před 4 lety +11

      oh my goodness same.. thing is im into learning languages and this is sooo much more amplified when you struggle even being able to say simple thoughts. sometimes i just shut down and dont hardly say anything. i dont like it because it can affect others negatively, but i dont know of much else i can do

    • @dylon4906
      @dylon4906 Před 4 lety +1

      He mentions that in this video tho

    • @benlewis720
      @benlewis720 Před 4 lety +3

      It’s worth it, “chime” in as he said in the video! Just little bits of expressing your thoughts are great and get easier with “chiming” in

    • @neverstopaskingwhy1934
      @neverstopaskingwhy1934 Před 4 lety +2

      you're not beig yourself when you're shy
      think about it my man truth

    • @fdb1539
      @fdb1539 Před 4 lety +12

      So? Listen to what other people talk about. I guarantee the conversations these people have are FAR dumber and more unimportant than the thoughts you have in your head.

  • @elle2630
    @elle2630 Před 6 lety +264

    I had to act in front of my school. Most of the people were fine with it, and I was fine with it. I was expecting to get a small roll or just be a background character... but I got the lead role for some reason. I’m fine with speaking in front of people, doing speeches, things like that, but I’ve never had an important lead role. I was nervous and I literally couldn’t think that I could do it.
    Skip to the day of the play, I was backstage. I ran up to one of my classmates and told them that I couldn’t do it. I broke down and I got nervous. My friend told me that all I had to do was be myself and make people laugh. I couldn’t back out at the moment, so I just got on stage. Hundreds of eyes were on me, but I kept going. I said the first line... and then people laughed. I liked that my comedy and acting was making them laugh, so I kept going. Now I’m in drama club and a theater geek. I’ve been in so many plays and met so many people.
    Just take a chance! No matter if you’re scared or not. I took a chance and it changed my life. You should too!

  • @davidtendernuts6982
    @davidtendernuts6982 Před 7 lety +364

    how to eliminate shyness for guys.
    1. Tell yourself "I'm not a bitch" and go for it. Sounds simple but it works. The harder decisions in life are normally the more beneficial ones. It's easy to be lazy, easy to fantasize about what you could/would do. Harder to take action and risk failure/rejection. It is the worst to let yourself down. That's probably one thing that leads to mid life crisis is you look back like "i should of/could of done this." Fuck all that, just go for it. You will feel proud of yourself. Hope this comment helps at least one person.

    • @davidtendernuts6982
      @davidtendernuts6982 Před 7 lety +8

      penile 1
      Actually yes, I do. Not everyone that uses the internet is an anti social house freak. I'm giving advice based on my own experiences.

    • @davidtendernuts6982
      @davidtendernuts6982 Před 7 lety +1

      *****
      can't argue with that. amen

    • @davidtendernuts6982
      @davidtendernuts6982 Před 7 lety +2

      Alexander Delarge
      you made the mistake of saying it out loud right in front of her my friend.

    • @idontknowwhatmyusernamesho5540
      @idontknowwhatmyusernamesho5540 Před 7 lety +1

      +David TenderNuts I have crippling depression

    • @Slechy_Lesh
      @Slechy_Lesh Před 7 lety +4

      +anythingnew If you're interested in shallow women - which you must be, else you'd have had more exposure generally - maybe you need to rethink things a bit.

  • @pikachuu128
    @pikachuu128 Před 4 lety +60

    “Anxiety is like not being able to live with yourself or express yourself” - Axel Dobbins

  • @pictureglum9095
    @pictureglum9095 Před 5 lety +21

    Some advice for people who get nervous in social situations: stop thinking about yourself as somebody who gets nervous in social situations. When you’re talking to someone, don’t think “oh god, I’m talking to someone right now, time to panic” instead, just take a deep breath, calm yourself. The other person really doesn’t care as much as you think they do, and I bet they’re feeling self conscious too. Instead, tell yourself that you’re confident and relaxed. Become interested in what the other person is saying. Focus outward, stop trying to see yourself from the other persons eyes. Ask questions, make remarks. If you’re relaxed, questions will automatically pop into your head.

  • @h_dls7993
    @h_dls7993 Před 7 lety +928

    I just have a question you are obviously amazing with the information you have, but the question is where did you learn all this?

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  Před 7 lety +417

      Mostly from self study and observation. I wish there was a school that taught this, but I've yet to find one

    • @h_dls7993
      @h_dls7993 Před 7 lety +43

      Okay thank you for responding, and thank you for all the amazing videos

    • @vangelicest4183
      @vangelicest4183 Před 7 lety +33

      Charisma on Command You're hot

    • @exodos2499
      @exodos2499 Před 7 lety +9

      Vangelicest gayy

    • @mschell350
      @mschell350 Před 7 lety +56

      we spend like 5 years learning about the pythagorean theorem in school when we could actually be learning useful things like this !!! i am the definition of shy. I really needed this video. Thank you

  • @cile12345
    @cile12345 Před 7 lety +330

    ive gotten to the point where i dont want to fuck with anybody. i think im ok with being alone now. its wierd

  • @isabellaperez2267
    @isabellaperez2267 Před 3 lety +178

    Is it just me or when I wear something covering my whole face or something like a mask, I have more confidence?

  • @palmistryslaps
    @palmistryslaps Před 2 lety +15

    shyness is a quality that implies a divergent way of being that is undervalued & stigmatized for non-neutral, motivated reasons, ("everyone should be and act in the world in the same ways"), and the impulse to "kill" it is quite alarming, because it suggests shy people should... not exist? SHY PEOPLE ARE VALID AND VALUABLE. I want a video from a shy person teaching loud people to be more shy or self aware. Loud people are often grotesque to those of us with higher sensitivity.

    • @Black.Sabbath
      @Black.Sabbath Před 2 lety

      Exactly, why aren't extroverts the problem?

  • @JaTroll01
    @JaTroll01 Před 5 lety +205

    At the club
    me: “hey what’s up! where’s the photo copier”

  • @jeeves9720
    @jeeves9720 Před 7 lety +1442

    So I guess I'm not the only socially awkward person here •_•

  • @yukiruikuta6500
    @yukiruikuta6500 Před 4 lety +29

    A friend of mine told me that apart from me,no one knows who i really am , so why believe what they say about me? She was right all along.

    • @Jack1994hoo
      @Jack1994hoo Před 2 lety

      Because the way they perceive you influe ces how they trest you and if you have to interact with them frequently thst can be a problem?

  • @misanthropic8459
    @misanthropic8459 Před 3 lety +8

    I LITERALLY WANT TO CRY WHENEVER SOMEONE TALKS TO ME LIKE .🧍‍♀️

  • @ox4tune
    @ox4tune Před 6 lety +2047

    "How to stop shyness in 60 seconds" Answer: get drunk

    • @KADU1978
      @KADU1978 Před 6 lety +51

      It works wonders every single time but be aware, in office or professional situations alcohol is quite hard to mask and can easily backfire real quick.... Don't ask me how do I know ...LOL

    • @mireyasalazar1784
      @mireyasalazar1784 Před 6 lety +2

      Dark Psionic 😂😂

    • @Peter-200
      @Peter-200 Před 6 lety +8

      Worked for me

    • @lourancia
      @lourancia Před 6 lety +4

      Dark Psionic So true

    • @kcalhoun8944
      @kcalhoun8944 Před 6 lety +12

      Dark Psionic no drunk i ain't officer

  • @alejandrojara6872
    @alejandrojara6872 Před 7 lety +1708

    How to stop shyness in 60 seconds
    *Video is ******9:44****** *minutes long*

    • @Waterlily321
      @Waterlily321 Před 7 lety +48

      alejandro jara in real life it'll take you a minute to do this, he couldn't explain all this in 60 seconds, come on!

    • @alejandrojara6872
      @alejandrojara6872 Před 7 lety +42

      Eleanor Its A Joke Come One!

    • @Szobiz
      @Szobiz Před 7 lety +6

      alejandro jara my first thought

    • @smoke4131
      @smoke4131 Před 7 lety

      the video streched by 1 sec it's 9:45

    • @tutorialgirl4469
      @tutorialgirl4469 Před 7 lety

      alejandro jara IKR

  • @arthea1377
    @arthea1377 Před 4 lety +11

    Maybe some of us experienced being bullied that's why we don't have confidence and we always hide . Being shy or socially awkward sometimes misinterpret other people , some see you as arrogant , shy or mad.

  • @Milkman4279
    @Milkman4279 Před 4 lety +19

    I don't talk much in social situations, (parties, going out to eat, etc). So when I do talk, everyone listens to me.

  • @asf1062
    @asf1062 Před 7 lety +1777

    Longest 60 seconds of my life.

  • @DaNyAaLcEc
    @DaNyAaLcEc Před 7 lety +224

    I usually find that if I unzip my fly and flash my gear to the nearest person it helps a ton

  • @lmao111yearsago9
    @lmao111yearsago9 Před 4 lety +54

    Let's just take a moment to appreciate his smile at the thumbnail.

  • @jenny-us1st
    @jenny-us1st Před 4 lety +84

    Im REALLY shy, theres literally no cure.

    • @calioutuuiu6432
      @calioutuuiu6432 Před 4 lety +2

      iiSimplyBubbly maybe becoming someone else

    • @mchelibob
      @mchelibob Před 4 lety

      iiSimplyBubbly same brooo

    • @neverstopaskingwhy1934
      @neverstopaskingwhy1934 Před 4 lety +9

      you're not beig yourself when you're shy
      think about it my man truth

    • @sznity594
      @sznity594 Před 3 lety +4

      dont try to be a different person, afterall an original is worth more than a copy

    • @ShadowWolf_
      @ShadowWolf_ Před 3 lety +1

      Do you atleast talk at school?at all?I know I don't which is a reason I don't have any friends and never had...hopefully you have friends..

  • @SteveJobzz
    @SteveJobzz Před 7 lety +164

    Hmm, this is not a problem for me.
    I usually space out while people talk, then I have no idea what they are talking about.
    Then I space out again because...whats the point anymore!
    Goddamn, I will die alone, wont I?!

  • @trevorhouff1173
    @trevorhouff1173 Před 6 lety +401

    Bruh, being in school and not knowing where to put your arms is so fuckin true

  • @gii757
    @gii757 Před 3 lety +26

    Aye but us shy people are the best once you really get to know us and we break our shell😌

  • @vandal.e6541
    @vandal.e6541 Před 3 lety +31

    I’m not the slightest bit shy when I’m around my friends. In fact I’m the most confident in the friend group. But when I’m not around my friends, my social skills fall apart

  • @JayHanju
    @JayHanju Před 5 lety +473

    The problem for me is that I actually don't have anything to say .... I blank out or just stay silent.. like.. what should I say??, how do I maintain conversations.. I usually have really short conversations with strangers because I don't know what to ask ... this is a problem for because I want to do nursing as a career and *communication* is the one of the *MOST ESSENTIAL SKILLS* for this course 😢😭.. I Overthink a lot too which is soooooooo bad 😢

    • @g.j
      @g.j Před 5 lety +45

      ONCE FOREVER Twiceuu Just show interest towards the other person once you initiate the conversation,show interest to what they say. The other person will keep it going. Only hope it wont bore you though, so be sure you have genuine interests or maybe just practice it till it becomes your second nature. People like to talk about themselves after all.

    • @hemanth1453
      @hemanth1453 Před 5 lety +5

      same like me

    • @edgar7456
      @edgar7456 Před 4 lety +11

      @@g.j But I try to talk with another introvert. It doesn't work because she doesn't talk, she's introvert or really shy idk but I can't speak with her because she just want to listen and I don't have anything to say

    • @esther9210
      @esther9210 Před 4 lety +1

      Ask a question, ask a question about their response and see if u can relate. If u don’t relate, repeat the steps.

    • @hapalapa8762
      @hapalapa8762 Před 4 lety +20

      Does anyone else pick that shy person to talk to so u feel more confidence

  • @matejastankovic7012
    @matejastankovic7012 Před 6 lety +640

    When i want to say something i just cant say it ...

    • @doodgeslagenmug
      @doodgeslagenmug Před 6 lety +59

      Mateja Stankovic Me too, it’s awfull and depressing.

    • @arelitorres2760
      @arelitorres2760 Před 5 lety +14

      Damn it happens to me too 😓

    • @MinYoongi-my9wr
      @MinYoongi-my9wr Před 5 lety +78

      I have a tip. Just don’t care what anyone thinks. When you have a thought in your head, don’t replay it over and over to make sure it’s perfect, just say it. Also, if you want to make a friend, just go for it. Who cares what they say? Who cares what they think? It’s your life. Gain confidence

    • @doodgeslagenmug
      @doodgeslagenmug Před 5 lety +9

      Min Yoongi you’re right! No rumination. Thanks!

    • @savbaddie5425
      @savbaddie5425 Před 5 lety +10

      Min Yoongi I knowww but when I do say I’m not going to replay that thought again it eventually keeps popping up in my head and it’s just so hard to talk to the people I really wanna be friends with.🙁

  • @timitarecom
    @timitarecom Před 4 lety +35

    You want to stop being shy, start a fight every day with a stranger and lose it
    like in the movie 'fight club '

    • @bobwoww8384
      @bobwoww8384 Před 3 lety +1

      aziz adventures Sounds incredibly emotionally effective however; compellingly psychotic. Cant see prolonged success outside of the truly mental. Perhaps understanding exactly what you mean is enuf to classify me as mental AF but that actually makes sense

  • @Chris-gu5lt
    @Chris-gu5lt Před 4 lety +242

    Me: Hey this is totally random but have you read any good books?
    Person: yes
    Me: Hey this is totally random but...

    • @SanDiegoSouth
      @SanDiegoSouth Před 4 lety +22

      A response to that yes is: What did you like about the book?

    • @blakestratton2382
      @blakestratton2382 Před 4 lety +46

      "Hey this is totally random, but have you considered the flaws in our country's tax code?"
      Yeah that's why I have no friends

    • @bread5414
      @bread5414 Před 4 lety +4

      @@blakestratton2382 just look for people that admire your quirks

    • @brinplsplsplstextme-jaiden7223
      @brinplsplsplstextme-jaiden7223 Před 3 lety +6

      If people give a one worded response, ask questions that either draw them out or require them to elaborate.
      Do you remember the names on any of them?
      Oh great, could you tell me about the story?
      What was your favorite part, or what did you like about it?
      And then you could proceed to give your thoughts based on their responses. Or give the answer to your own question whether they ask you or not.

    • @SinoLegionaire
      @SinoLegionaire Před 3 lety

      @@blakestratton2382they don't deserve a friend like you.

  • @PatrickAllenNL
    @PatrickAllenNL Před 7 lety +178

    1. walk outside
    2. drop your pants
    3. let them laugh
    4. run away
    5. cry it off cry it off

  • @clim5353
    @clim5353 Před 6 lety +60

    I don't want to small talk with people I don't know, without sounding rude, some times I just don't care enough to talk to some people, I'm quite a lot of the time, and only talk when it's about something i have good input about, I don't believe in just talking for the sake of it, but when I do talk about things, it's really coming from somewhere of truth and something I have really thought about and has meaning and that way I'm really being me, not just talking because socially I feel like I should, but this is just how I feel, but as you said in the video, i think for people that want to be more open.

    • @shafwandito4724
      @shafwandito4724 Před 6 lety +1

      Zyprox in short: YOU ARE INTROVERT

    • @Weloz92
      @Weloz92 Před 5 lety

      Same. Many have said to me that, when I speak, everyone feels like that my opinion means serious business just because I won't flap my mouth around all the time like a lot of people.

    • @gorrillawarfair
      @gorrillawarfair Před 5 lety +2

      Same, i fucking hate "weather talk/small talk".

    • @oliverford5367
      @oliverford5367 Před 2 lety

      If you don't start talking to people, you'll never get to know anyone

  • @anaya1956
    @anaya1956 Před 4 lety +63

    I don’t understand myself, how do I know almost everybody in my school and everybody know me but I can’t even learn how to be social and maintain these relationships 😭😭 I just feel so out of place

    • @fdb1539
      @fdb1539 Před 4 lety +4

      You feel out of place. The solution? Actually be out of place. If you feel even more out of place, go somewhere else. If you feel in place, congratulations.

    • @TheRealTact
      @TheRealTact Před 2 lety

      @@fdb1539 what?

  • @tresh0re
    @tresh0re Před 3 lety +14

    when someone says that I’m shy and why im so quiet I became more shy and quiet . Im really trying to hard to be not one. I often cry because of my shyness , its really depressing... i dont know what to do in my life anymore its really hard.

  • @KatyaGabova
    @KatyaGabova Před 7 lety +183

    I never liked the word "Charisma", so the name of the Channel made me feel kind of skeptical. After watching some of the videos I can see how much helpful they are. I rarely suscribe to the Channels and quite seldom a video seems to deserve LIKE. But the channel deserves approbation. :)

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  Před 7 lety +65

      Welcome to the channel! That means so much.

    • @badassherbivore3338
      @badassherbivore3338 Před 6 lety

      There are motivational channels that give tips, tricks, and steps on how to change bits and pieces of your life but all of them explain things very vaguely, this guy makes it clear and logical. I subscribed today.

    • @Skiddleszsz
      @Skiddleszsz Před 6 lety

      Charisma sounds like Christmas. Just connect weird words with awesome shit.

    • @Skiddleszsz
      @Skiddleszsz Před 6 lety

      this was kind of a joke btw, not trying to sound assholish :)

  • @murk.mp4760
    @murk.mp4760 Před 6 lety +3624

    Is it me or does his mouth looks edited?

  • @JaxBoogie09
    @JaxBoogie09 Před 3 lety +13

    For some reason I’m shy when my parents are near my classmates but without them, I feel comfortable to talk

  • @michellecunningham5392
    @michellecunningham5392 Před 3 lety +2

    So I am a shy, timid person and I don’t talk much. I also talk low so people would say “Can you speak up?”, “Talk louder I can’t hear you”, etc. My dad told me to stop being so timid and to be confident. Like... it’s not my fault I was born like this! It’s not my fault that I was autistic and couldn’t speak! I didn’t ask to have speech classes since I was 2! This is how I am and I feel like I’m being punished for it. Well they want me to not be timid... Imma show them what happens when I’m NOT timid...

  • @KarKraftsman
    @KarKraftsman Před 7 lety +16

    I can only imagine how many introverts you have made more confident to be social. You got a great channel and here is to 1 million subs!

  • @doczero1296
    @doczero1296 Před 7 lety +316

    He makes it look easy af but in reality it's really not, at least for me.I'm too awkward.

    • @camilledoodle6069
      @camilledoodle6069 Před 6 lety +49

      iknow its hard but look your watching stuff like this means u value how to improve or learn n stuff don't give up

    • @miszBEB0x
      @miszBEB0x Před 6 lety +1

      camille doodle yes!!! we can do it guys

    • @hunterparker9988
      @hunterparker9988 Před 6 lety

      DocZero hey me too I'm socially akward

    • @FrenchWhiteBread
      @FrenchWhiteBread Před 6 lety +1

      DocZero same I gtg cry in my bed now

    • @dollyri1995
      @dollyri1995 Před 6 lety

      Hunter Parker yes DISTURBED!!

  • @langianimations416
    @langianimations416 Před 4 lety +48

    I'm not shy I just really have nothing interesting to say.

  • @elisanapolitano4437
    @elisanapolitano4437 Před 5 lety +9

    I'm extremely introvert but I think I got to a successful enough way of networking and meet people. The point is, you don't have to necessarily say much.
    People are super duper intrigued by people who can actively listen. You don't have to really storytell or anything. Just introduce yourself, and then ask a question. And not an "how are you doing?" one, but actually some that may interest them.
    Ask about something you are passionate about, and that leaves to the other part the chance of an open answer. You can ask about their favourite kind of music, if they've ever tasted that dish, if they know somewhere to go eat or stuff like that. Y/N questions are conversation killers, but if you are able to find a common ground it'll make things way easier.
    What also helps a lot is to go to events that revolve around a topic. For example, I'm a huge nerd and I know quite a lot about the indie gaming industry and community. I thrive in that kinda situation where I can ask about a certain controversial topic, network gathering opinions, etc etc. To talk about business or to ask people out there's always time, but if you need a good impression or simply want to enjoy your time, things will be soo easier if you find a common ground and try to move to deeper levels.
    Also, people will appreciate that more. Many just meet and chat about what they do, but what's really important is to get someone to talk about what they love doing, or open up about a concern, or something else. Sometimes I believe I don't find anything to say not because I'm just shy, but because what's being said is not really of interest to me, so I try to actively drift the conversation to something different, or limit myself to listening to what they have to say, or even better explain politely I don't know anything about the topic they may be talking about, but tell them I'd love to know more and if they can explain me that.

  • @michaelcutler5538
    @michaelcutler5538 Před 7 lety +109

    pro tip: you can watch these videos all you want, but it won't do anything for you if you don't go out and practice what he says.
    "If you want something you've never had, you'll have to do something you've never done".

  • @anf4488
    @anf4488 Před 7 lety +111

    I'm not shy but I'm a dope to door salesmen so I had to watch this just in case.

  • @icantthinkofone7125
    @icantthinkofone7125 Před 4 lety +7

    The job I wanna do kind of needs me to present once or twice a week..
    Actually I used to extroverted when I was younger but then my parents taught me in ways where they completely shattered my confidence, now I’m 16 and I realize the problem which is confidence so I’m working on it. This is why I want people to know that it’s not them, or their parents, it’s the ways they were raised.
    Edit: pretty much what most people need is a boost of confidence. When presenting or speaking to someone and you feel shy, you may not realize it but you feel smaller than that person you’re talking to. This is why you have to tell yourself that you are the best and nobody is better than you. I did that during a presentation and it actually worked.

  • @Michie170
    @Michie170 Před 4 lety +2

    Today I applied the stomach rule to calm me down before a speech and the 3 second rule to look at people. It really helped. Started watching your videos a week ago and already starting to notice a positive difference. Thank you!

  • @MrMMAJER
    @MrMMAJER Před 7 lety +78

    It's weird, it feels like if you actually know me. I'm definitely subscribing

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  Před 7 lety +13

      I know where you live. Just kidding! Welcome to the channel!

    • @MrMMAJER
      @MrMMAJER Před 7 lety

      Lol thanks!

    • @GuyLogen
      @GuyLogen Před 7 lety +1

      He probably knows psychology. It's a great tool for understanding people.

    • @MrPatrickbuit
      @MrPatrickbuit Před 7 lety

      It's called the forer-effect

    • @616Haggard
      @616Haggard Před 6 lety +7

      Julian Ramirez
      That's called a crush, Julian. It means you want him inside of you.

  • @izzyblake2674
    @izzyblake2674 Před 7 lety +96

    omg this is what my theater teacher emailed me lmao

  • @trajectory7235
    @trajectory7235 Před 2 lety +1

    This sounds like really good and practical advice. Something I've noticed in my observations of my own social anxiety is that the moments before interacting with someone is often far worse than when I actually do go for it. The trouble is learning how to get out of my head. I want to try your advice this week.
    Thank you very much for this video!

  • @jerrybaxter2613
    @jerrybaxter2613 Před 2 lety +1

    I find it incredible that this video and a lot of what you do is shot in one take with little or no jump cuts! It comes across so authentic and it's a practice I hope to emulate as I get started with my youtube channel.
    Awesome work!

  • @roberthoffmann930
    @roberthoffmann930 Před 7 lety +931

    How I defeated my shyness: I imagine the person standing in front of me is a poop

    • @vain.a2
      @vain.a2 Před 6 lety +190

      Minabbit well a lot of people are pretty shit

    • @SlothBird
      @SlothBird Před 6 lety +30

      I imagine that they are dead corpses standing in front of my cold soul.
      All you have to do is shove a murder list in their faces, and make them regret ever asking or judging about you by burying their dead body when you finally found the perfect time

    • @maryJaeJ
      @maryJaeJ Před 6 lety +27

      😂
      It may work....only if he woldn't be my crush and see him as a really cute poop.

    • @petergalinari7118
      @petergalinari7118 Před 6 lety +27

      That would make me laugh so hard in front of whoever was in front of me haha. This definitely wouldn't work for me

    • @jewelzthegemini1388
      @jewelzthegemini1388 Před 6 lety

      Minabbit I lold

  • @maximillianschauer1439
    @maximillianschauer1439 Před 7 lety +52

    this channel is just beautiful

  • @benjaminbechtiger3867
    @benjaminbechtiger3867 Před 3 lety

    I often struggle to communicate/interact with people, have been watching a lot of your vids. Over the last year I found myself doing more and more social interactions, even if they were out of my comfort zone. So, thank you Charlie

  • @shelby2688
    @shelby2688 Před 4 lety +7

    My social anxiety is sooooooo bad, I don’t know how to deprogram myself from feeling the need to preform and put on this ego facade

  • @allylovedance
    @allylovedance Před 7 lety +2133

    why does his mouth remind me of the joker. im not being mean i swear lmao i like the joker

    • @MewSakura12
      @MewSakura12 Před 7 lety +66

      Kevin Hernandez maybe but he has a beautiful big small

    • @guide8571
      @guide8571 Před 7 lety +75

      Ally Munoz i find his mouth sexy .

    • @cursedwings7584
      @cursedwings7584 Před 7 lety +9

      I think that it would be successful. But instead of people machines. lol

    • @FatUnicorn2797
      @FatUnicorn2797 Před 7 lety

      Ally Munoz I see it now! :0

    • @josephinewang3325
      @josephinewang3325 Před 7 lety +3

      Ally Munoz It reminds me of Jeff

  • @chuckaule6292
    @chuckaule6292 Před 6 lety +85

    i remember i saw this documentary about a guy that took shyness to the next level, like he got to the point where he couldnt even talk to his family. he had this psychologist helping him get over it, and one thing she had him do is walk a banana in public. i felt like i could take something from that, cause most of the time im afraid im gunna make a total fool of myself in social situations. i feel like everytime you do a little screw up, its just enough to keep you fearfull, what you really gotta do is fuck up so bad that afterwards your like, man, i dont think i could do something that bad even if i tried to recreate it, it almost desensitizes you in a way. i mean you could totally go and walk a banana down the street and i think it would help a shy person immensely. idk if i could do that hah, even tho i know it would help me. you know people would be telling the story of the man they saw walking a banana for ages

    • @HeyVeatiful
      @HeyVeatiful Před 5 lety +8

      Chuck Aule ajajkakakas omg I actually wanna try this. It seems like such an icebreaker!

    • @Sindruzzzz
      @Sindruzzzz Před 5 lety +4

      Lmao where can I watch that documentary?

    • @TF80s
      @TF80s Před 5 lety +1

      @@Sindruzzzz you would just become the town oddball who everyone whispers about which will then make you feel like a depressed reject who's only friend is a bruised banana.

    • @bingoing
      @bingoing Před 5 lety +7

      @@TF80s what a downer

  • @Milkman4279
    @Milkman4279 Před 4 lety +6

    When I was a real estate appraiser and I wanted to break the ice with a homeowner, I would ask them about their pets. It was something they were passionate about, without being too personal.

  • @zainsiddiqui409
    @zainsiddiqui409 Před rokem +1

    Man we need more people like you honestly your such a legend for creating charisma on command

  • @greeneyesracyfox3476
    @greeneyesracyfox3476 Před 6 lety +80

    Learn to live and act on your voice instead of analyzing and criticizing ur self before lift off.THAT WAS EXTREMELY HELPFUL TO ME.THANKS!

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  Před 6 lety +2

      ~ Glad to hear you're finding it helpful!

    • @jzrc7908
      @jzrc7908 Před 5 lety

      i can do this but the problem is i may being too extra

  • @melodyyork6578
    @melodyyork6578 Před 6 lety +614

    Thank You Mate I don’t have social anxiety sometimes I shake when I’m scared or freaked out or can’t breathe or feel like I can’t.
    And I’m learning how to be more social I’m really trying I know it’s not anxiety
    It’s just me.
    This helped a lot.

    • @lqvxnderr5696
      @lqvxnderr5696 Před 6 lety +5

      Same

    • @jemuzu0944
      @jemuzu0944 Před 6 lety

      Me too bro

    • @jemuzu0944
      @jemuzu0944 Před 6 lety +9

      And i just use my phone to avoid shaking

    • @riell.4021
      @riell.4021 Před 5 lety

      Same

    • @brunosantez6334
      @brunosantez6334 Před 5 lety +1

      Melody York Not certain about the points made but ,if anyone else wants to uncover shyness treatment try Renkarter Anxiety Method Report ( search on google ) ? Ive heard some super things about it and my mate got excellent results with it.

  • @lemonwater7169
    @lemonwater7169 Před 4 lety +3

    I know this was years ago but I LOVE your channel, it’s very interesting and helpful.

  • @elenapascu9469
    @elenapascu9469 Před 4 lety +36

    Ahh I'm crying I'm so shy god help me

    • @aliiiichum
      @aliiiichum Před 3 lety

      SAME. it literally pains me to talk to another human being

    • @infinity9171
      @infinity9171 Před 3 lety

      Same and even if I do try to talk to someone I just get to AWKWARD

    • @AmielCetraro
      @AmielCetraro Před 2 lety

      how are you now

  • @moonchild3806
    @moonchild3806 Před 6 lety +117

    thank youu i need this haha i'm so shy especially at school. i always watch the people that i've been wanting to talk to since like last year and i couldn't get a word out of me to any of them. then eventually two of the people i wanted to talk to graduated at the end of last school year-and i never even got to introduce myself :/ i think i'm gonna try talking to people now, usually i get so close to asking someone a question or saying "hello" but what stops me is: what if they ignore me? what if my voice cracks? what if they don't hear me? what if they don't like me? so then i just contain myself & i don't say a word.. it's just so much more easier to talk to boys than girls. i've had someone ignore me :( and one time my friend tried complimenting this girl on her sweater and she got ignored, it's really discouraging. SO PEOPLE, WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO TALK TO YOU: DONT IGNORE THEM

    • @glassunicorn1525
      @glassunicorn1525 Před 6 lety +2

      It is really rude to ignore people, but maybe that girl was out of it. I sometimes accidentally ignore people when I'm thinking:)

    • @edwintarucmasanque5286
      @edwintarucmasanque5286 Před 6 lety +2

      moonchild we're same.I'm a shy girl too!Ever sinse I'm elementary and now I am grade 7 I am shy.I cannot talk much.Because other might ignores me.I don't want to be ignored.I always think negative thoughts.I am not participating in school.And When the time i talked,they can't hear me because my voice is too soft.
      I feel uncomfortable when I am around with many people.Yes,I have a lots of friends,And yes I am lucky to have them,But now I don't know what to do because I am shy to join them.
      The one thing that can make me proud is to overcome my shyness!

    • @JC111414
      @JC111414 Před 6 lety

      I think about those same questions but I wished I would have said more to those people instead of being quiet.

    • @lucywanjiku9723
      @lucywanjiku9723 Před 5 lety

      Ur not alone ave been going to a new school for a week and I haven't talked to anyone only this one girl who I keep following n now she thinks I'm weird

  • @jbrdbr111
    @jbrdbr111 Před 6 lety +598

    I tried the part about introduction, I walked up to some girl, said "Hi my name is your name" and she walked away awkwardly.. What did I miss here?

    • @jhonjohnjonjondoe5011
      @jhonjohnjonjondoe5011 Před 6 lety +63

      Because you don't just walk up to them hahaha. You walk up to them after you made eye contact and say something it can be nice or it can be about something you are acting like you are looking for which most likely works best since you can pick anything that you can make fun of or joke about. Doesn't have to be like what he said something you are really looking for. Example: I was a teen when I used to go to the mall just to have a social interaction with a girl. I intentionally had made eye contact but that was Obv. I then walk towards her and she tries to walk around you because I make it look like I was just gonna keep going but instead I move with her and she moves the other way then say hey can I ask you why you keep trying to cut me off? Boom it's pretty easy and always make it silly so it never feels personal and it is light hearted. That allows them to open up. Make sure something you do or say you have no emotions attached to it and that will make you not nervous about it. I always liked to make it a joke out of a normal everyday social interaction I have and she has everyday so they have some sort of connection or emotion attached to it. For instance how I did what I told you I did. Everyone walking in the mall tries to move out the way of each other so she never seen it coming but because she knows that it came from a perspective that has a emotion attached to it. I know this was long winded but explaining the WHY it works is what will make it work.

    • @Eudomac99
      @Eudomac99 Před 6 lety +214

      I don't think you get the joke. He literally went up and said "My name is your name".

    • @axel253
      @axel253 Před 6 lety +12

      Ohhhhhh my god😣

    • @blank9062
      @blank9062 Před 6 lety +7

      jbrdbr111 idk I don’t see anything wrong...

    • @horizon5677
      @horizon5677 Před 6 lety +6

      Well that's a pretty cool introduction. I woulda speak with you.

  • @mariaalejandramunoz8183
    @mariaalejandramunoz8183 Před 3 lety +8

    I'm so shy that I don't even take pictures of myself and post them because Im always thinking what people are gonna think when they see it. Or maybe they see flaws I never saw

    • @nikfarah9036
      @nikfarah9036 Před 3 lety +3

      100% relatable...i do post pictures but i will archieve after 5 min

  • @futuretwist
    @futuretwist Před 4 lety +3

    I can vouch for this one!
    Just moved out to Washington, wayyy better clubs here than back home.
    Decided I don't want to be a shy introvert anymore.
    I think back to Charisma on Command,
    "take up space, maybe make a little noise."
    So I start going hard all night. Dancing with all my energy, really getting into the music.
    NOBODY else is too energetic yet (It's the first DJ of the night), dancefloor isn't even half full yet
    I'm totally into it, and when a song I recognize starts playing, I'm screaming with hype, at this point I figured I was making a bit of a fool of myself
    But whatever, I'm into this, I'm confident. Too energetic is better than too small. I'm feeding off the energy of the room
    Within the first 30 minutes, the obvious "popular guy" with all the girls, clearly been here before, probably always in the VIP, comes over and starts to interact with me a bit
    Now we're both going hard, his friends follow,
    Now we're a circle of people all dancing together, having a good time. Dancefloor is filling up quick.
    We all exchange snapchats by the end of the night.
    Success.

  • @sephwatson340
    @sephwatson340 Před 7 lety +94

    Gonna use all these, going to a new college soon

  • @MrMeowMeows619
    @MrMeowMeows619 Před 5 lety +1221

    How to overcome shyness : be born a different person.

    • @fattshea8085
      @fattshea8085 Před 5 lety +25

      wrong

    • @tehprotrollboi6472
      @tehprotrollboi6472 Před 5 lety +41

      bam, you've officially given into effortlessness, if you want to fix your problems, then you have everything you need to do so, you just don't know it if you think like that

    • @jkrollingsheep1463
      @jkrollingsheep1463 Před 5 lety +11

      @@waseemshah3571 oi noooo

    • @baldevkumarmohta8770
      @baldevkumarmohta8770 Před 5 lety +1

      @@waseemshah3571 shut up

    • @xhmbx9548
      @xhmbx9548 Před 5 lety +1

      @@baldevkumarmohta8770 but he is right tho! LOL

  • @pralenkaman8105
    @pralenkaman8105 Před 5 lety

    I have my first club night tomorrow and have been binge watching these videos really helps to have an idea on how to better socialize

  • @BradenMeyer0
    @BradenMeyer0 Před 4 lety

    Love the videos man, you showed up on my reccomended a couple years ago or so and your videos really do help out, doin a great job man.