Why The Salem Witch Trials Were Nothing Like You Think - Hilarious Helmet History
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- čas přidán 30. 07. 2017
- The Salem Witch Trials were more like a mid-credits scene in an 'Ant-Man' film rather than the 'Avengers' sized witch hunts happening literally everywhere else.
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Now I'm not an expert here, but I'm pretty sure that's not a helmet.
Aren't hats just pussified versions of helmets? :P
arent helmets just hats for people who need head protection?
Hat's are boneless helmets
can I get uhhhhhh 🅱️oneless helmet
that's no helmet, that's cultural appropriation
The Crucible isn't meant to be an accurate history of the Salem witch trial. It's about McCarthyism during the Cold War. It's saying the hunt for communists was as ridiculous as the hunt for witches.
Fire up the torches, time for the greatest witch hunt ever
Bethany Brose exactly!
It wasn't really though. I mean, sure, it was overblown and paranoid, but communists were actually at least real and there were Russian agents who were trying to subvert the US (which obviously also happened the other way too).
Bethany Brose read witness by Whittaker Chambers and the Venona papers.
the crucible is based on the Scarlett letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne which written in the 19th century...so no. thanks for trying though.
"She turned me into a newt."
"A newt?"
"I got better."
It's interesting to me that you didn't mention probably the biggest misconception of all. That the Salem witch trials took place in what's today known as Danvers. Salem today is what was known as Salem Town, Danvers was Salem Village, where the trials and executions etc. actually took place.
Christie Lynn one day my parents will love me
He did explain that
Actually the trials and executions took place in present day Salem, Salem Village (modern day Danvers) was where most of the accused lived as it was all farms
👏
It was pretty much the entire north shore. There’s very few towns in the area that don’t have some kind of connection to the witch trials.
Helmets can be hats but hats are not necessarily helmets
noxabellus kinda a square/rectangle situation really.
This video always causes me to think about the fact that most of my high school history class argued that the Salem Witch Trials was a more significant historical event than the Trail of Tears... they were idiots.
It should also be noted that lynch mobbing some guy or gal is soo much easier when there is no palpable authority to stop it. You know, cause they're all out at war doing more important shit.
That "more weight" happened in real life. I did a project on it.
R Nickerson Corey’s gravestone was on my street, I think they just moved it though
@@Richard_Nickerson probably wanted to die quicker, crushed by rocks means slow asphyxiation with too little weight.
@@Richard_Nickerson very true
Salem is one of the nicest places I've ever been! They are very accepting and very nice! It's a beautiful town!
Puppysankittens I can't tell if that's sarcasm or an actual compliment, you've stumped me, that doesnt happen often
accepting nigguh or no
accepting, not excepting
You are obviously under the control of witch magic!
I get it. That's pretty clever there. I almost missed it.
In fairness, Miller's "The Crucible" WAS more inspired by McCarthyism than it was by the historical events it portrays.
annajane8890 I mean... Yeah. He threw in all that cringy stuff about a man sexually abusing his servant and cheating on his wife and tried to make him some kind of tragic hero. Like maybe if you hadn't have cheated on your wife with the housekeeper then she wouldn't be going to jail??
"Witches aren't real" - that's going to piss off a lot of modern day pagans...
Anyone who unironically calls themself a pagan deserves a crusade
@@denverbritto5606 pagan lives matter
@@denverbritto5606 Anyone that mocks and ridicules another based solely on a very broad self label like "pagan" without actually knowing shit about them deserves a crusade
@@denverbritto5606 educate yourself
@@unknownartist8136 self-identified pagans are the ones who need an education
"and if you disagree with me you probably have good reason too"
Sir, this is the internet, you forgot your rage...
Wait... if there's no such thing as witches, who turned me into a newt?
Jane Lin god
Jane Lin I did ಠ⌣ಠ
But did you get better?
A vet. Vets do a lot of newtering.
Drugs~
What do you mean, witches aren't real? She turned me into a newt!
You thought I would say I got better, didn't you? No, all that happened was that Robert Evans made brandy out of me.
(Honestly, read "A Brief History of Vice." I'm not being paid to say this, it was just really fun.)
did she weigh the same as a duck?
BUILD A BRIDGE OUT OF HER!
wicken?
Isaac Mayer what also floats?
really really small rocks
The "more weight" thing actually happened, Giles Corey only ever said more weight when they wanted him to confess to being a witch
I'm related to one of the "Witches", her name being Martha Carrier 😂
I love him.
Rawrist y
Rawrist 👌👌
*GASP* Rawrist! Yay! Didn't know you watched cracked!
Hey, Rawrist, I can tie this all back to GoT...
Do you know why witches fly on brooms? Because brooms look like shooting stars and meteors, which were thought of as demons or witches, given that they caused destruction. A big falling star was once even thought of as a fallen angel named Light Bringer (or Lucifer if you speak Latin). It brought about the long winter in medieval times, referred to today as The Little Ice Age, which was followed by war over resources, famine and disease. Sound familiar? We even saw the meteor in season one of GoT. It's based on this Freemason version of actual history, including the really ancient history!
Hey, Rawist! Didn't expect you here. You have a good taste in videos, though.
Cory wasn't executed...he refused to give a plea of innocence or guilt and was being coerced into entering a plea. He was killed but this technically was not a form of execution
Issa execution. If he didn't plea, he would die.
Eric Badgley They also accused him of witchcraft because he had no heirs and the state wanted his property, and they could take it if he was dead.
Alex Meyer I just hate it when my neighbor accuses me of being a witch and my government uses it as an excuse to murder me and steal my shit.
Alex Meyer no, he had heirs. That's why he refused to enter a plea. Because, no matter if he pled guilty or pled innocent (and was later found guilty) his property would be confiscated, but if he refused to enter a plea, he would just be dead and his estate would pass on to his children/wife
You have read the book and he has not. Good on you!
Very interesting and informative. Thanks!
This channel needs more recognition
Wow! Congrats on pronouncing the ü in Würzburg as an actual ü and not a u.
(signed, a native German speaker)
Also signed as a witch?
German vegan crossfit witch...
As a decedent of a woman hung during the trials, actually in Salem, thanks for setting the record straight. At least as straight as it can.
Daniel Gengler descendant?
may I ask who you're a descendant of?
Rebecca Nurse.
Daniel Gengler Interesting, thanks for sharing. May your ancestor Rest In Peace.
+Daniel So you got a little witch in you?
lol I life in Bamberg Germany... just learned something new about my hometowne :D nice
Just discovered this show, but I need more than just 6 of these. Dang good.
So the modern understanding of witch hunt (like McCarthyism) comes from an older understanding of witch hunt (hunting witches), which itself was actually, secretly the modern understanding of witch hunt all along?
themarquess yep
Humans can be pretty predictable
Not to sound nerdy, but... I really like the music in the background!
Alexandra Kopko you're a nerd and I'm judging you
How is jazz in any way nerdy? It's not bloody Chopin.
fred McLovin it was sarcasm.
@attckonutube I don't think @fred McLovin was talking to you
It kind of reminds me of the Magnificent Seven theme tune.
Excellent video! This is very interesting.
That was the single most comforting video I've ever watched on this channel.
He looks like he gives great helmet.
It's sad when human beings turn on each other.
funzjag
Yes, cat. It was.
so all of time is sad because humans have turned on each other forever.
mavfan1 all of space and time is indifferent
time and space are incapable of indifference.
funzjag it's not sad when human beings turn each other on, though, right?
Wow that turned surprisingly uplifting at the end there thank you i needed that.
That's a really nice message. Thank you
Witches are real. My sister in law is one. She says wiccan. I say witch.
I think he simply meant the particular witches and what they were being accused of simply wasn't real. What they were being accused of was binding their soul to Satan, sending their spirits out to torment people and committing supernatural deeds. I know a friend who is a Wiccan and that is wholly dissimilar. I hope that makes sense.
emptyvoices31 I agree
The difference is that a Wiccan restrains themselves from practicing black magicks intended to cause harm to others, whereas a regular witch does not, esp not if Santeria or Voodoo.
rex mundi Wiccan practices magic but that doesn't mean she's a witch.
If you look it up Wicca is just a nicer way of saying witch, this was done on purpose to protect practitioners from narrow minded people who persecute witches.
ok iDubbz calm down
edit: I take this back.. This guy is awesome. Don’t judge a book by its cover
HAVE A GREAT OAT he is pretty cool but I Dubbz has a certain badass doesn’t give a crap about your feelings kinda thing
Scott Harrison
*idubbbz
These are still some of my favorite videos on CZcams
Definitely replayed that last part of the video 10 or 11 times. Very satisfying
Confirmed: the Salem Witch Trials were MEMES
Witches aren't real? Tell that to my ex wife
Austin J 😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂
🤣🤣
😭😭😭
Boomer humor
Ok Boomer
Informative!
What I got from this: Dank memes caused the Salem Witch Trials.
I find it funny that I'm playing rn Town of Salem. I've been lynched too.
lolomomario c l a i m ?
the witch trials were one big meme
😂😂 "probably, I don't know when this video comes out" 😂😂
That is a nice last phrase you said there. Well done.
I'm from the future.
Errmm, do you want the good news or the bad news?
Anyone else here from Würzburg?
McCarthy was right. Read Witness by Whittaker Chambers. Then read the Venona papers. McCarthy was rude but he was right.
That mass roast was on point
Being pressed to death was a common punishment for refusing to plead Guilty/Not-Guilty in court. They were placed with their back against a wedge with a door or a plank of wood over their chest and they had rocks put on the door until their back broke. It was also used once in ancient Greece to cure a twisted spine.
They also hanged a dog because they thought it was possessed :(
Bryan BlueFish The hell is wrong with people?
Princess Ameatia
relegion
kaas saus Yes, because in the bible Jesus totally says "Thou shalt hang every possessed person always".
Seriously Mr Kaas, stop trying to use religion as a scapegoat to excuse the rest of humanity from their stupidity.
Honestly, it's just the British, they hung everyone for everything back in the day.
Sources?
I 💘 the idea of The Salem Witch Trials being a case of teenagers just 1 using each other 😂
Wow, you get to talk about history and wear a variety of hats and helmets?
You, sir, have quite the dream job.
Video should be renamed why the European witch trials where better than the American ones...
he's kind of obnoxiously smiley... I mean this is pretty grim stuff. I'm creeped out and I think above employee needs a psyc eval.
I read a article that describes the begging of the salem witch trials, at first three woman were on trial for the bewitchment of the teens in the video. To of the woman pleaded innocent(obviously), but one of the three said she was a witch and sighed the (you won't believe) devil's book, while describing black dogs, red cats, and (for some reason) yellow birds. This jumpstarted the trials, aside from everything you said
hm, I guess I was lucky enough to have a good history teacher. I expected all my ideas about the Salem witch trials to be fake but they were all spot on to this video.
"When a bunch of Americans lose their minds, all at once, those periods of insanity tend to be temporary."
the key word here is "tend"
yes he's still president, thank you flying spaghetti monster
finally a silver lining! subscribed
More! We demand more!!!
except there have been plenty of wars without witch trials occurring afterward.
That's a logical fallacy. You can't take an anecdote and apply it to all other situations.
hotshot nice try, but I think you misunderstand the fallacy. If they said war (p) gives rise to witch trials (q), and i said since there was no war (p), there cannot be a witchtrial (q), then you would be correct. But what I am arguing is about cause and effect. the video is claiming that witch trials follow wars. what I am arguing is that witch trials is just one possible outcome, given that we can examine literally hundreds if not thousands of conflicts and discover that witch trials do not follow. We can also find examples of witch trials that occur at any time without reference to a prior conflict. What I am arguing is that there does not seem to be a hard rule p to q. rather p may lead to q, or not. I would point out that perhaps you need a certain cultural mindset (superstitious fundamentalists) for the with trial to be a more likely outcome. but really, to argue that witch trials will *always* follow war is difficult to prove.
hotshot anecdote? ok you lost me now. the point I am making is that the reason many towns in Massachusetts resorted to witch trials (specifically) was due to their fundamentalist religion. It took inversion by Boston authorities to end these trials. The people of Boston considered themselves members of the Enlightenment, and were quite embarrassed by these witch trials which they considered to be throwbacks to the middle ages. Given that wars do produce stress in populations, it would be surprising if nothing occurred. Political purges are common, such as what occurred in Germany after WWI.
I would be more interested in learning in what way these people were stressed, and why would witch trials occur, given modern attitudes of the time. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Witch-hunt
Yes, there were. And there were also wars and revolutions were democracy and republics didn't come about. The thing the video is suggesting is that the witch trials were a manifestation of the fear, insecurities and trauma created by a post-war/currently at war society.
Witches do exist just aren't green old women hunched over Dusty old tomes... It's a nature/fertility religion. Similar to a Shaman. Modern my known as Wiccans....
Grimmy Mischief he probably meant: the stereotypical witch (with the flying on broomsticks, pact-making with Satan etc.) doesn't exist. Also magic doesn't exist.
While all wiccans are witches not all witches are wiccans.
If anyone is interested in an alternative hypothesis, Silvia Federici's "Caliban and the Witch" places European- and modern - witch trials at the feet of internal struggles for primitive accumulation and the construction of women as a dispossessed and subjugated class. Specifically it was the economic power of peasant women who enjoyed historically high wages and social position after the Black Death wiped out many Europeans that created a backlash we know as witch trials.
Ended on a very uplifting message!
Actually, witchcraft is a craft practiced by actual witches. Saying witches aren’t real because you don’t believe in magick is like saying christians aren’t real because you don’t believe in God.
You believe in christians?
Actually, witchcraft is a real practice, similarly, so is wicca, which is a pagan religion.
Lost Guns I practiced in the wiccan religion for years, I am Not a pagan! Do some research before categorizing people. What you said is equivalent to saying that Baptists are black.
Daisy Lais Pagan: A religion not widely practiced, especially if polytheistic. By definition, Wicca is, in fact, a pagan religion. I myself practice the wiccan religion, and witchcraft and I have no problem calling myself a pagan. Besides, why are you so angry about this? There are plenty of other pagan religions that are perfectly fine.
Thank you, witches are real
Daisy: was in the pagan community for over thirteen years, and everybody I knew regarded Wicca as a subcategory of Pagan. Your views are kind of unusual.
Daisy Lais Wiccan's are pagans. If you this that they aren't then you're probably confused about the definition of pagan or doing Wicca wrong.
"if you think war didn't cause the whole Salem freak out ....... I'll allow it "
and here I was expecting him to say "YOU'RE A WITCH"
Fantastic wrap-up.
"Temporary."
So the witch trials were just an old 4chan board making medieval memes?
Your idea of witches isn't real.
Witches, as in wiccans, are real...
True wicca died out in the dark ages. Modern "wiccans" are just poorly imitating a religion almost nothing is truly known about, whose practitioners lived in an entirely different era in entirely different conditions. It's kind of insulting to the earlier practitioners to claim that your beliefs and rituals are the same, because they really aren't. We don't have the necessary historical context or understanding to revive it.
Am from Bamberg. Kind of expected getting ignored (not in person, my town i mean) when clicking this video. Weird feeling as I realized this isnt going to happen, even weirder when you went a bit into detail. Thanks, I guess?
Btw, all the german cities you mentioned are interesting and worth a visit. Not only, but also because of the history we have here. Also, it's beautiful here.
Also: I'd say we were sucessful. I don't see any witches around.
Interesting. DIdn't know about the wars going on at the same time. The only thing I remembered was the plague that spread right before and only really calmed down a little later than the witch trials.
Nice 👍
first it was fred now George 😭(tell me if you got the reference)
Music Trix I’m going to McDonald’s want anything?
Obviously Fred and George Lanchester the British automobile pioneers ;-)
Your sense of comedy and historical facts make me want to go deaf and blind
shout-out from Salem MA!
Hey you random stranger, hope you're having a great day!
DON'T LOOK AT MY PROFILE PICTURE Thanks, great day to You as well!
DON'T LOOK AT MY PROFILE PICTURE Don't tell me what to do
Thanks, man, or whichever gender you prefer
Thanks.
I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, but I'm starting to feel better.
Yeah this is one of those "We had to get a video in by Friday" entries on the Cracked catalog. Basically the video breaks down to "Salem more or less happened exactly like you probably read in school but then there were a bunch of other witch hunts and we're going to frame this like you're somehow *wrong* about it."
Thank you for giving us that very brief bit of hope in our current issues 😂
Everything I learned about the Salem Witch trials I got from watching Sabrina The Teenage Witch. That episode opened my eyes I'll tell you!
Witches are real. Its a religious practice. That's like saying christians aren't real. XD
Brigh Geal Witches aren’t real 🤦🏾♂️
That's like saying Jedis are real because there are cos players
Well... I think he means "Witchcraft" isn't real, like "God" isn't real - though both "witches" and "Christians" are real, as it simply refers to people of a particular spiritual belief system.
well - "real" in the sense that they believe in it - there are people who think they are witches - especially in sub-Saharan - not that different from being a priest @@sirkeg1
Witchcraft is a religion, so witches are real. (though it's not called witchcraft now but that's beside the point)
Witchcraft is not a religion but a craft and a practice. Paganism and Wicca is a religion though. Paganism is like a big umbrella with many sub-categories and Wicca can sometimes be involved as well. I myself am not a Pagan nor a Wiccan but a witch so I can not speak for them completely. I practice witchcraft but do not follow a religion. I thank you for letting others aware that it is real though. Not many people seem to believe. :)
NeatScribbles fus roh
dah hagraven
NeatScribbles that by definition it in makes you Pagan.... Damn milennials
Yeah but in this context of people having magical powers by consorting with the devil. That’s not real
Thanks, Cracked.:)
There is some thought that tainted grain may have played a factor in the Salem trials specific case. There has been evidence found from what records survived the era saying that they had discovered a mold on some wheat grains, and there are many types of mold that would have been far less noticeable and far more insane. One strain that is native to the region creates a strange side effect when it infects barely, upon infecting barely, the mold mutates, and when consumed, it creates mild hallucinations, convulsions, paranoia, foaming of the mouth, and in rare cases, complete paralysis. And some historians believe that it's possible that such a mold could have contributed to the histaria as the town got it's food from the same field where a similar but less harmful mold was discovered only a few years later
Russia! Russia!! Russia!!!
Witch! Witch!! Witch!!!
just here to say that witches are real. Ever heard of Wicca? Pagans, and the many branches of Craft / Ritual religions?? I would say you'd be in for a surprise should you ask any of em
I never realized that in the internet game Town Of Salem, that the default names for people were based off of the actual names of people that died during the trials
What an unexpectedly nice note to end it on
Last Week Tonight talks about Alex Jones...uhh I can't wait to watch!
Snoopy Fod GET OUT OF MY RECOMMENDED FEED
Witches are real. But it's really more of a religion with it's own different sects. I just wanted to say that.
somehow i do feel better now, thx cracked
You give a bibliography while talking and I fucking love it
"Witch trials made people feel like they were being constructive" that's how I feel about 90% of the SJW scene right now.
last dog standing Sounds about right.
Are you talking about the fringe 1% of leftists that could be categorized as SJW's and can't change absolute shit in society because everyone knows they're insane, or are you talking about all the reactionary "sKePtiCs" that continuously milk money out of this over-used, irrelevant and inconspicuous "SJW" label to entertain mindless masses that can't even be fucking bothered to look beyond the thousands of "fEmiNiSt fAiLs #9999" and keep throwing shit at an essentially non-existent scapegoat *_just like the fucking witch trials?_*
Get a grip, "SJW" is just a complex marketing campaign used to milk money. SJW's literally have no fucking power.
"Witches aren't real" hahaha, you haven't been to Africa
Ophias Dzamara touché
I learned that Giles got crushed to death for his family's sake. If there was a confession all of their property would be taken and they'd starve, so he died to protect them :(
When you're from Mass and you're eating dunkin while watching this. Drank some Sam Adams last night too.
The root cause if witch trials as a while was religion.
Kinda? I mean, the Catholic church can''t really blamed, because they were educated enough to know that witches aren't real, so they didn't actively hunt witches, but the uneducated people believed in witches.
when the catholic church accused someone of witchcraft they were pretty much just looking for an apology. they would only torture and execute people that didn't confess, so if you ever travel in time and find yourself in a catholic witch trial just confess your heart out. the best example of this is probably the spanish inquisition, because that all just ended in thousands of bullshit, and in many cases contradictory, confessions of crazy orgy-parties with satan. and then a few years later spain was like "come on guys this is just dumb", and then outlawed witch trials, and i'm not sure, but i think they were one of the first to do that. the catholics mostly used witchcraft accusations as a way to kill of people that disagreed with them and didn't really believe in witches. the protestants though, that was a crazy bunch of bloodthirsty witch hunters. i really don't think you can even talk about the german witch trials without mentioning martin luther, because he was pretty much the main psycho behind it all, at least for a while. the protestants genuinely believed in witches and they weren't all nice with the confessions either. if you travel in time and end up there you're kinda just dead a soon as you've pissed of a priest.
not saying the catholics are innocent though, because i think they kinda started it. and they did execute a fair amount of people too. but considering the circumstance (and its kinda hard to be a really nice accuser in a witch trial) the spanish inquisition was pretty alright. not what you'd expect! nobody expects the spanish inquisition
1st
i automatically thought of Harriet's Magic Hats
when he said the helmet history lol
More weight! Most epic last words ever spoken!!!