I HAD AN EMOTIONAL EXPLOSION
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- čas přidán 17. 12. 2020
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Kami talks about experiencing emotions and her fear of being needy.
Date Filmed December 16, 2020
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FIGHT FOR TOGETHER IS: Ben (DAD), Kami (MOM), Dove (19), Eden (18), Seven (16), Memory (14), Filia (9), Rainier (4)
I think a lot of us as moms & wives feel this way. We put everyone before ourselves, and at some point the people around us become accustomed to this and decide this is just who we are. And then you hit your 40's and for some reason your like hey! I'm a person too! I have feelings and needs too, why can't anyone see me! Because we have done this to ourselves. We have fixed everything and everyone for so long we lost ourselves. We forgot who we are and so did everyone else.. Find yourself, love yourself, care for yourself. When you start taking time to do these things you will feel better, and the others around you may be a little shocked at first, but soon they will see you are a real human not just put here to meet their needs. Thank you for sharing. Susan A.
OMG! I love this comment and I love the " Find yourself, love yourself, care for yourself" I needed to see this! I am 50 and have started feeling this. I have been telling family NO and they freak out. They can't believe I am saying no and just taking care of me. Thanks so much Susan!
RIGHT “Having emotional needs isn’t a negative”.....being assertive about our needs isn’t needy, refusing to accept responsibility for them is paradoxically needy
I will just say i've been really digging Kami's esthetic lately!
Thank you so much this, I related to this a lot and realized things about myself too.
Thank you for processing how you deal with emotions, with us & for sharing about your personal goals for the future. It is truly a gift. ♥️ I can relate to wanting to focus on others ahead of myself. I now know that I need to keep my own needs met to be able to give more fully, more lovingly. Yes, in theory I understood it before but I wasn't practicing it. I was also suppressing certain emotions like anger and jealousy... Family background & my religious upbringing are factors for me. Now, I focus more on how each person (even me!) can get their needs met. And I encourage myself to experience a range of emotions and not let them build up - it's still a work in progress for sure. Thanks again for being vulnerable and courageous. My wish for you ~ to be able to take any comments here that have been helpful, to heart... And to release those that are not.
I appreciate your honest vulnerability Kami, thank you for making these videos.
Thank you Kami... really I wish I could tell you in person. I don't like to be needy either and I'm realizing my relationship of almost 9 years may end due to porn and trust. I needed this video at this time in my life and I think you have your shit together more than most of us. I aspire to have a home and relationship like yours; kids aren't for me and at 33 I'm okay with that. Overall just know you're not alone and shouldn't be overwhelmed you're doing great!
Dear Santa, please bring the Crawford family peace, understanding, and happiness for Christmas this year.
Yes!! I love the reminder that we are all still growing throughout our journey. Thanks for the honesty and opened up this conversation.
Kami, you rock so friggin much. I can identify with all of this and you put it into words much better than I could. Thanks for always keeping it REAL. Mad respect.
Thank you. I appreciate your openness to share/talk about hard topics. It’s a hard topic for me too. Recognize, process and coping with emotions isn’t clear for me sometimes. I think past trama is my reason for not understanding why I feel a certain way at times, easier to push it all down than cope with it. I will try some of your advice on this!
thank you this was insightful
Thank you so much for your authenticity, Kami. Your openness has helped me more than I can say. Linda
❤️😊
Thank you for talking about this I feel the same way. I have to breath and then go for a walk to get my energy out and thoughts organized. It's a relief to hear I'm not the only one who feels this way.
I made a theory that where was a conflict/processing style: explosive, talkers, and repressive types that will eventually explode. As a talker, I did NOT want to deal w/ someone yelling at me. In their eyes, I wasn't returning the energy energy because I didn't care enough. Overall, it's good to know your style and those you are close with. The different styles will butt heads and need work to get through.
I would be really interested in learning about what changed you and Ben went through. I find that listening to the growth in your relationship allows me to ponder new questions in my own relationship. Thanks kami for sharing!
Perception and assumptions can be a problem. Glad you’re working through them.
Hi Kami, I HIGHLY recommend investigating NVC NonViolent Communication developed by Marshal Rosenberg. I was introduced 20 years ago and it changed my life....how I discover my needs and the needs of others and how to communicate them. Peace
We just ordered a book called Non-violent communication. I can’t wait to check it out! -Kami
So happy to hear that. I discovered it when I was researching a peace curriculum for our school. What I can say is it is a lifelong process. I know a lot and have gone through a lot of training and I still feel just above a novice 😉. Wishing you love and peace.
I can relate to ALL. OF. THE. FEELINGS. And I think all the Covid stuff complicates it. On top of ignoring my feelings, I've been shutting everyone out. You've encouraged me to seek out a friend and potentially professional help. Thank you.
I'm in the same place..learning to feel my feelings and work thru them so they don't explode later
As an entirely detached observation by someone who only knows the Crawford's via hundreds of hours of vlog content over the years, it has been intriguing to watch the deconstruction of your long-held faith (which was fully warranted based upon the severely abusive arena you found yourselves in), now followed by a reconstruction seemingly devoid of God. A reconstruction precariously attempting to sort out complex issues of the self - yet with only the self as the ultimate point of reference. I am in no way saying that a renewed faith or just the right bible verse would fix everything, but rather I have personally really enjoyed watching the family grow and evolve over the years. Its a rare gift and I appreciate the transparency. Now I just need to start the book!!
I would say that their faith wasn't genuine. It's impossible to walk away from God if the faith was given rather than a self driven act of will. When people choose faith, rather than faith choosing them. They can walk away easily. Simple as that. BIble talks about both..faith given by God and those that say they were Christians but walk away. Pretty clear on that. But God chooses who He wills and nothing is set in stone. I'm enjoying their journey. I was once on the same path. I really TRIED to walk away but God kept/keeps calling me back..like I said, it's impossible to walk away once faith is given. At any rate, it'll be interesting to see if their journey takes a turn back around. What I found was that I can't do churches full of hypocrisy and no longer go to one. But I can do Jesus and His way of living and loving people. Much better option.
@@renbren3008 Your comments hit me as very judgmental - you have no idea if their faith was "genuine" or not NOR even where they are in their spiritual journey right now. Everyone's faith experience is deeply personal and special AND yet, there can be similar themes and things we can learn from each other's journeys.
If you have deconstructed your faith life as you alluded to, I'm surprised at your approach to folks who *may* be walking through that. I'm missing your compassion for how difficult it can be. Perhaps more deconstructing is ahead.
@@renbren3008 I pretty much checked out after your opening sentence....
@@denali9643 Seriously, what a delivery!
@@denali9643 the truth is painful..The Bible is clear about it though and few like to think God is control of salvation not us..Hardly judgmental.
It could be hormonal, or Covid pandemic this year. We all react differently to events around us. I hope you can come to a resolution. Self care is so important.
Say what you think in a constructive way. Best practices in my opinion is to not be easily offended by other people and to try hard to not offend anyone. When a problem does come up nip it in the bud with good communication. There is no such thing as ignoring our feelings they always come back up to cause havoc in our lives so keep a short list of unresolved feelings.
Kami, i’m just 5 min into your vlog when a question pops up in my mind: How can you help Ben and the kids when you can’t help your self with our emotions ?
Kami, i want to dare you to listen to At My Best - Machine gun kelly and listen just to the lyrics.
Its ok to be sad, its ok to be angry. And talk it out before you Y’all go to bed!
For me the time comes here in the Netherlands to wind down.
So I want to wish you and your family and everyone that is watching: Shabbat shalom ❤️
Gaaf een Nederlander die FFT kijkt!
@@Presshandstandgirl ik keek ze pas toen ze op de appalachian trail liepen. Ik heb best wel bewondering voor deze familie. Ze zijn op zich voor mij een inspirator om eens de Mount Blanc te gaan doen. Staat wel in scheel contrast met wat zij volbracht hebben. Maar hee, ergens moet een begin zijn.
@@daanski82 ja ik keek ze ook toen ze de AT gingen doen. Heel knap dat ze het voltooid hebben. En gaaf, de Mont Blanc is wel een heel toeristisch gebied. Maar als je in september zou gaan is de meeste drukte weg. Succes met je planning, en.... gewoon DOEN! En hou een video dagboek bij, super leuk om terug te zien. Ik heb ook wat filmpjes online staan
@@Presshandstandgirl dank voor de tip. Als wij hem gaan doen doe ik dat het liefst voor of na de drukte, ben liever een reiziger dan toerist. En de 1e keer zal wel van hotel naar hotel worden. Just om elkaar aan te voelen en te zien. En als we het gaaf vinden kunnen we dit uitbreiden naar vaker. + met openbaar vervoer is dit goed te doen je bent wel een dag zoet met over stappen op Parijs en Lyon maar hee je hoeft niet na te denken.
@@daanski82 volgensmij wordt er alleen in Italy streng gecontroleerd als je zou gaan wildkamperen. Gewoon keertje proef kamperen in NL. Hebben wij ook gedaan om te testen of al onze spullen op orde zijn. Of weekendje België ook leuk. Genoeg mogelijkheden. Je moet je eigen angsten aan de kant gooien. Zolang jij alleen voor de nacht kampeert en geen vuur maakt komt t helemaal goed.
🌻
Don't sweat it.
Totally related to this, and think a lot of women esp can... similar downward spiral myself lately.
This is something I've been dealing with recently. Thank you!
Making your bed is overrated after you spend a long time sleeping outside.
I hope this has a happy ending. I could only watch about five minutes of it. Too depressing for me. Ben is probably packing for another thru hike about now.
I would probably pack for another thru hike before Ben would 😆