Depression, the secret we share | Andrew Solomon
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- čas přidán 17. 12. 2013
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"The opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality, and it was vitality that seemed to seep away from me in that moment." In a talk equal parts eloquent and devastating, writer Andrew Solomon takes you to the darkest corners of his mind during the years he battled depression. That led him to an eye-opening journey across the world to interview others with depression -- only to discover that, to his surprise, the more he talked, the more people wanted to tell their own stories. (Filmed at TEDxMet.)
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*Depression is wanting to go home,when you are already there*
Amazing..
WOW...you explained it very well in just one sentence
:o that is the exact thing! how did u...??
I- how…?
omg.... how ...
Yes that exactly this feeling
The worst part about having depression is knowing the potential you hold but never being able to muster the energy to use it.
Listen to Jordan Peterson
I am in that exact situation right now..........
@@nathanielgirma8265 i do he helps a lot. one of my big inspos
Same here
U need to rise above it
It feels even lonelier when some people misunderstand depression as being lazy, and you keep that thought to your inner selves. Those depressed people are already experiencing a lot of difficulties and that just hurts them even more.
Damn, why is this so relative. I seriously want to push myself to do extraordinary things but it's really a challenge when I have this.
Especially when it's the people who are supposed to understand and be supportive 🙃
I just thought it was laziness that caused me to be like this, but was it not?
I never was lazy. I was just too scared to come out of my room and too afraid to meet people.
I felt that like a *stroke*. @4:25
the saddest thing about depression is when we try to talk about it to someone else they just ignored and underestimated it, it's no joke
and they doubt and dont believe it because we're outside seem just like normal people, happy and fun
It’ll be because some people get a little sad and see a sad piece of music that makes them feel sad for a day, and they say they have major depression, they say that they are severely depressed when they aren’t, it silences real depressed peoples voices and makes people who already find it hard to speak out, even harder, like the boy who cries wolf but it was someone else shouting about a false wolf
I agree, even worse than being depressed is being depressed and no one believes or even cares. Depression is such an awful fucking illness I would never wish on my worst enemy.
@@midzynolimit This! My parents think it's a joke. They're like you're laughing and smiling. You're not depressed, just dramatic and ungrateful 😂😂😂
The people around me just start talking about themselves when I try and explain what I'm going through. I don't matter
It's so weird to read about so many people struggling with a similar thing when you feel so so incredibly alone all the time.
that needs a ted talk of its own
Jesus Loves you, don't give up. He makes all things new.
That's because everyone has different experiences when it comes to depression and a lot of depressed people are too ashamed of admitting to others that they have depression myself included
That's exactly what I was thinking 😅
exactly..
I have never seen a man speak about an emotion so clearly and understandably.
*****
what makes you say that?
*****
ah in that manner, but don't forget: he's part of the society that you call bullshit. depressed peoples aren't the ones to jump to the opportunity to go on stage...
and he is probably the only one to explain it that well too.
I've never heard depression expressed so eloquently.
You must not read
How about women?
We are all dying but when you have depression you can feel every moment of it.Thats the pain you feel.
And at the worst point you feel you are a terminal ill person. At least that is what I go through when I relapse
Realization.... its sucks.... it feels as if your stuck..... not enough time... and not knowing if ....
Same feeling, I feel pain every day ,
"There's no such thing as love without the anticipation of loss" THAT HIT HARDER THAN A TRAIN
Face Lift
Look up the four noble truths in Buddhism.
True
6:57
It even hits harder than my dad
It sucks when you think you're lazy but you're just so depressed that you don't have the energy to get up and get out of bed
+Cody Hosfelt It also sucks when you know you're depressed and when you come out to your parents for support they turn on you and tell you that you're not depressed, you're just lazy.
+Eternal RotMG When I told my mother I wanted to die and I wanted the pain to end, she told me to stop crying for attention. She yelled at me for two hours, screaming that I was lazy and I would accomplish nothing in my life. Somehow that made me so angry, I can still feel the anger. But it was the first thing I felt in months, maybe years, besides the deep, dark depression. And sometimes I think that what my mother said actually helped me, even though no good mother should ever say that. I felt something that was not depression, and any feeling was better than depression. Even the betrayal, dissappointment and anger towards my mother was better than the fear of breathing for one more moment. It was proof that I loved someone, that I still existed and that I was capabele of feeling something other than sadness and fear. I hope you can someday see your horrible experience with your parents from another perspective. I hope you can find closure and maybe you can even forgive them. Perhaps your mind will let it rest once you know you will treat your (future) kids better. Lots of strength to you.
+Eternal RotMG I'm sorry to hear that, from both of you, I hope things work out and everything turns around for all of us.
+Daniel Maas the funniest thing in all of this is that we dont know what its like to be normal .(not depressed)loooool.
If you had though times during childhood they use that as a reason to apply the Antisocial Personality Disorder instead of Clinical Depression and then people start claiming you lack empathy without knowing why and the reason is that the terms psychopaty and sociopathy (there are lots of differences between the two) are guided to never be addressed by the professionals when diagnosing it. If they diagnose as depression, there you have it... the medicines...
"The opposite of depression isn't happiness, it's vitality": on the list of truest words ever spoken in the world
+Yolis Bortin Please help me understand this. I don't understand what he means. I thought happiness and vitality are same?
+abcdefg15720 Vitality is a bit more complex than happiness. SImply being happy is being content with where you currently are. Vitality is, by dictionaries definition, the power to live and grow. Vitality is feeling headstrong and ready for the challenges in life. Atleast this is my interpretation.
+abcdefg15720 I have had several depressions like he describes it. It is like all the desire to live is sucked out of you. Have you read Harry Potter? It feels like being kissed by a dementor. Not anything you want for anyone at all...
+Yolis Bortin Yes. Ironically, you can be depressed while appearing positive and feeling happy, but the problem is more that the part of the brain that effects will is out of action, the transmission of signals throughout the nervous system is out of whack (loss of coordination and phantom shooting pains), memory and concentration are kaput, and there is a mental fatigue which is like being overloaded with too many demands when you are very tired, but in an extreme form to the point where even brushing your teeth is too much to cope with.
+abcdefg15720 No... vitality is not only seeing/knowing the things that make you happy, but having the ability to actually get up and do them. Depression is being devoid of that motivation and energy (among other things) -- which in turn makes you sad *in addition to* being depressed. People often mistake the term depression to mean sadness, but they are not the same thing at all, although they can overlap. In like fashion, happiness and vitality are related but not the same.
I must have watched this at least 20 times at this point. One thing that depression does to you is make you feel so completely unseen, misunderstood... so alien. So to hear someone so eloquently, accurately and almost beautifully describe the experience of depression means absolutely everything. I have since gone on to read and watch everything I can find of Andrew’s. I am very grateful for this talk. It has saved my life. Literally.
I agree Meg, in times when I've been unwell I find this video so helpful. I hope you're feeling OK today and finding some comfort 💜
Remain strengthened Meg.
Life is full of ups and downs but all pass!
It was very good, and it is also enlightening to read all of the people's replies. There are so many sad people in the World, mainly from being alone and no one caring if they live or die, why are we not uniting to help each other?
Woah. i didn't know that. I have quite a few ood friends, carin family, and life goals, but I still feel alienated from my classmates for example even in a bustling room. Sometimes I have goosebumps, and feel cold just from nothing, and I don't know why.
Sending the love your way (heart emoji)
having depression feels like you're literally going insane.
yes you are
@@RudyLouieTayong no u
uh, no
I'd say having chronic pain 24/7 is like going insane!
:(
Depression for me isn't sadness and crying all the time. I haven't cried in years. Depression for me is feeling nothing, neither good or bad, about anything, accompanied with a constant dull ache in my body.
Ver rite
Precisely. That’s how I felt too. Dead inside. Thanks God for antidepressants.
You are right: depression is emptiness, not sadness. I explained it in a video.
mine just take turns between feeling fine feeling nothing just empty and feeling a long constant panic attack .. like he said at the beginning id rather slit my wrists than having to go through a month of acute anxiety .. yea its that bad ! there is no worse feeling not even dying .
kevnar actually this is something called anhedonia. I’ve had it since Sep 2018, it did get slightly better, but nothing shbstantial
does anyone else feel like they aren’t truly living they’re just surviving ?
I know what you mean 😞
big mood
about 80% of world's population, and people like me who think about suicide 5 times a day
Notice that "truly living" and "just surviving" are value judgements. Value is a relative concept... so the question becomes: "relative to what?" Play around with that, look at the many permutations, the many relationships that you can conceive of... and see what you find. You just might surprise yourself.
@@bromazepam781 bruh it will get better! Work on rejecting negative thoughts. I've got your back!
"Mama, oooh
I don't want to die,
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all."
Aye Bohemian Rhapsody
That line helps me so damn much
Or just the world to just stop !
shadow hedgehog
" The opposite of depression is not happiness but vitality" that's so true😞
Vitality. I wish I had it
Yes 🙌🏻 they try to tell you you aren’t trying hard enough when that’s all you can do TRY
4:04 "The only reason not to kill oneself was so as not to hurt other people"
That is the only thing that has kept me alive for about 8 years.
Westwood Shadow I know that feeling buddy
Me too. I am sorry this is your reality and I hope one day you can be happy.
xRiss13 Thank you. Honestly, it does make me happy to know how happy i made people like my mom, grandparents, and my dog. It does give me a sense of purpose. But, i am also learning to accept myslef for who i am and to treat myself the way i deserve to be treated, and i feel like that's helping.
I know that feeling well. I was able to find a treatment for myself after ten years of research, without drugs, and with minimal counseling. The key for me was learning to remove people and things that caused me stress. It was hard but given it was either that or killing myself due to the pain, I chose life. I had to want to live and get better each day.
I finally learned to accept myself as the introvert that I am, that there is nothing wrong with me but that society in the US is designed for extroverts and forcing myself to live that way was a major factor for my depression. It is inflammation in the Hippocampus, It is chemical, It is quantum, it is psychological, and it is up to you to become your own counselor, find the tools, and find a way to enjoy the experience that is life.
Jeremy Jimenez Thank you for sharing these points.
Sleep was always a temporary escape.
Music is my temporary escape.
getting good sleep, working out well and often, nutrition, and a good support group can make depression better! I felt depressed in my senior year of high school and still feel anxious from time to time but I think working out helped me SOOO much!
My anxiety is actually one of my biggest tools in working out - if I did not have anxiety I probably would not go as hard in the gym because my anxiety only leaves when I have been working out for a good time and have pushed myself to my limits! I use my anxiety/stress as a fuel to motivate me every single day! And because i grow and get better, I am kind of forced to do a little more than the last time to get rid of the anxiety again. if my anxiety still remains, i know I did not not go hard enough. Whenever I feel anxious, I am reminded to workout! In fact I have gotten so fast at running I went from a 6:18 mile to a 5:18 mile in about 3 years and have gained about 3.5 pounds of muscle in the last 2 months just by consistently training
It is... But there are times that even sleep is not enough to escape. You are just awake, existing and wondering everything and that nothing matters.
Kaushik Donthi i’ve cleared my died, not even a cheat meal.
I’ve started lifting the past year and gained 12 kg of lean mass, but my sleep is still bad. I fell asleep just for exaustion and wake up usualli at 5 am laying in bed anxiously until my day start.
I’m more insicure of my body now, chasing a perfection i would never achieve, the relationship with family and friends still as empty and vacuous as they were before and i live life like a mechanical thing to do. I remember that prior to working out i felt really great playing videogames while now I don’t even wanna play them anymore, too much work to do and can’t enjoy them like i used to.
Exercise and diet are healthy and anyone should do them but if u are fucked in the mind they will only be a useless phase in your useless life. They are not a magic ritual to happiness and fullfilling
I always have bad nightmares so sleep to me isn't good.
"I hope that 50 years hence people will hear about my treatments and be appalled that anyone endured such primative science."
Good chance that this time we live in will be considered barbaric, like the dark ages.
Amen!
I once described this feeling to my old therapist:
"It's like someone puts a bucket over your head. You know there's a world outside of the bucket, but you can't even imagine it. All of your consciousness is filled with the bucket, you can only see the darkness and you can only hear the echo of your own voice. It takes some incredible force to get through that veil."
Well put! :))
That is well stated. It reminds me of Sylvia Plath's description of depression as being inside a bell jar.
You just described the cave allegory pretty much. Something they teach is psychology classes early on. It's very real. It's all about lifting the bucket little by little or taking that step outside the cave. It may be scary but it will help you on your way to save your life and see the world again. I am thankfully a survivor of MDD. Thought you might appreciate looking into that if you haven't.
man there is deep sorrow in his voice.
Man it sucks
With all that sorrow, how does bring himself to the stage entrance.
@@robertjennings397In my opinion: He learned the benefits of; moving forward , doing new things , new experiences makes him a bit less depressed - the feeling of success and that courage .... etc - that makes him get up everyday and get on the stage and write about these things.
there is sorrow but there is also calm and wisdom.
@@robertjennings397he enjoys what he does. I’ve slowly learned to do whatever the next thing is that brings me some sense of joy, no matter how small or infinitesimal it may be. And this doesn’t happen every day or even week. But if there is a sliver of a smile on my face for a split second by the end of my day.. then that is some form of progress. It’s like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets. That’s no cure-all but damn has it helped me
Major depression isn't about less thinking.It's about thinking so much that you can't even move.
linda linacre that's probably anxiety mixed with depression. Anxiety tends to makes a person who suffers from it think or overthink things in a pessimistic way.
I understand completely what you're saying. Sending blessings your way from a sister in Rhode Island..
Sincerely, Mary Ann
Take care Linda 🙋
Yes, thinking adds so much. The anxiety to depression is fuel to a flame. So many people don't understand how bad depression is. I find it hard to explain it, but one think I have said is "when you wake up, your nightmare ends, but when I wake up, mind begins"
That's not depression...that's anxiety. I've suffered with both for 20+ years.
My mother was struggling with depression most of my upbringing and my family would always act like it was such an inconvenience like such a burden so when I started feeling similar feelings I bottled them up, I never told anyone in my family how much I struggle with being here on this earth, I didn’t wanna be a burden. This video really helped because you explained it so well. Thank you.
How are you doing now?
I am sorry to hear that you had to go through your struggles with depression on your own, and I'm glad to hear that the video was helpful in explaining your experiences. I could not even imagine the challenges you had, especially during the pandemic. It is unfortunate that mental health still faces stigmas and seen as an inconvenience or a burden by some individuals in our community, especially from families, which can make it difficult for those struggling with these conditions to reach out for help.
It takes a lot of courage to open up about your struggles with mental health, and it's understandable that you didn't want to be a burden to your family. However, it is also important to remember that seeking help and support for mental health issues is not a burden, but a courageous and necessary step towards healing and recovery. I encourage you to continue seeking out resources and support that can help you navigate your mental health journey. There are many professionals and organizations dedicated to helping individuals with mental health issues, and you don't have to go through this alone.
Thank you for sharing your story and I admire you for being brave enough to reach out for help.
the worst thing is when i look into the future 20 years from now and i would ask myself: “Do you regret anything?”. and i know that the answer is “yes everything”. breaks my heart every single time
That goes through my mind everytime.
I look back over the past 20 years and now instead of grief I feel anger. I gladly and willingly accept this anger because I finally feel like I have a voice. The depress med me mute, it folded me in on myself, collapsed my sense of self-worth. I despised who I was while depressed. The anger instead is my speaking up for myself, defending myself. It tells myself of my worthiness of existing. I will not be controlled by my triggers. I will create a new narrative, one that values compassion first and foremost for myself.
My heart was in my throat the entire video. I’ve never heard anyone describe the feeling of depression so well.
Yeah, it hurts sometime that you can’t speak out like this to explain who ask about something we’re feeling vulnerable to talk.
I cried in the first three minutes. “You KNOW it’s ridiculous”
So true
I've watched it so many times and it still moves me.
Same!
If you have never suffered from there's no way you will understand how terrifying it is. People will sympathize but not understand.
I do feel depressed, but I like it somehow.
@@DCBfanboy sadness is addictive
@@kenjamingarnett9595 Indeed!
Gollum crying somehow feels good. Lately it feels like it’s my only friend
@@arrietty1619 it's kind of how it is :/
"Depression is a flaw in love. There no such thing as love without the anticipation of loss, and that specter of despair can be the engine of intimacy."
The funniest thing is when you go to a psychologist and you unleash all your pains and he says you should exercise more and kicks you out
Something similar happened with me. I got told to do meditation and exercise and think positive. How can I explain that it's not that I don't want to meditate but I can't. I can't get myself off the bed in morning cause I don't feel like there is any reason to do it. I just wanna sleep forever. But it's sad that nobody gets it😔
@@btsismylifeuindianarmy4909 I understand...
I go to the therapist for the first,
“I need help”
“Medication?”
No, I want answers to my questions not meds”
“ OK medication it is”
I think you should try other therapists bc they all have a method you just need to see what works for you. The one you are talking about must have been cognitive behavioral therapy. for example my therapists does a combination cus I often need to talk about my past experiences and analyze the impact they had but also live in the present and do things such as having better habits. Please don't give up. I swear therapy works
@@leafsautumn659 i have been to 14 different specialists scross italy
" I told my therapist I'm having suicidal thoughts, he said I had to start paying him in advance " -Rodney Dangerfield
dude-
Ok, maybe not the time or the place but it IS a funny joke and we have to laugh when we can!
Toxic world it is..
Keep in mind Rodney dangerfield is well known for making self disparaging jokes
AYO
I wished he'd never stop talking, I want his voice to accompany me everywhere. is that weird ? for 29 minutes, I wasn't alone
I felt same way exactly ! It's because he knows how we feel inside . You are not alone in that feeling .I miss the feeling of family & love so bad that it hurts constantly .
He gives language to your emotions
HE SHOULD WORK FOR AUDIBLE❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Totally!!!
Yes it kinda is, but we are all weird so in some way it’s normal
I just want people to know - I’ve watched this video a ton of times over the years, in some very dark places. It saved my life, quite literally. Now, I’m realizing I haven’t had to come back to it in a couple years. I’m in a fantastically healthy relationship with an amazing woman (she bought me a copy of Andrew’s book, actually), I’m in a job that I’m good at and don’t mind doing, I have some good friends, and there are things I love to do in my spare time. It’s mostly small things, but it’s the kind of thing I’d have considered a miracle 5 years ago. So if you’re here in the comments, and you feel like you’ve always been in this state and will always be there, I want you to know that as someone who’s been there too, you’re never too far gone for there to be the possibility of happiness in your future. It might be sneaking up on you right now.
I've watched lots of TED Talks on depression and this is one of the best out there! It's 7 years ago but timeless, really.
I agree with you. I've watched this video so many times when I'm feeling hopeless or nothing at all. Everytime (for me anyway) it helps. It might sometimes help only a little bit but it helps me.
Even CZcams knows I’m depressed
I am with you in this....somewhere,hugs from Norway 🌈
Haha
@@sylwia7060 i hears people in scandinavia are the happiest lol
@@user-ci7vu7eo9w ....not true,er have alot of money and safety not love and hapiness... Greetings from Norway 🌈
@@sylwia7060 i was sarcastic
"Depression is a family secret that we all have". So accurate.
not accurate, my family secret is herpes, keeps us movin, why am i the only one who seees through this charade. what a whiny exhausting man.
@@fastawake870 interesting, do you all have herpes?
@@fastawake870 my family's secret is alcoholism
Depression is something stolen from you. It’s something you know it’s gone but don’t know what it is and don’t know when you lost it. But you feel it’s gone forever...
You know it's depression, when you feel you have no control over yourself, when you feel alienated from yourself, and everybody around you, when you don't know anymore what will bring you peace, when waking up in the morning feels like hopelessness, when you lose track of time and your daily chores, when you sit and stare at the ceiling, at the walls, ruminating over everything, and feeling worthless, when the voices in your head take over the wheel and you lose all control, when self-care feels like an obligation, when showering feels like drowning, when looking at yourself in the mirror feels like you don't know this person anymore, and feel immense hate for that image, when your reality gets disoriented, and the world feels like an illusion, and no reason left to live.
The worst is feeling like you don’t want to live yet you don’t want to die...stuck in the in between. Lost in translation. Any suggestions
dont ask the comments, find professional help :)
Please seek help from a professional. All I can say is that you are not alone. Hold on.
I still have not found the right therapist...keep looking...I'm still looking...but you can make it...my meds are what has been helping me although I still have low days.
i feel the same i have a therapist but i still feel this way always. you’re not alone
This is my own personal opinion. I think that most people don't really want to die... I think we all want to live. Living is in our nature. But logic aside, there is always something that makes us feel good even for an instant. Even if it is for a very tiny instant. When I think of those things I realise I want to live to play that videogame again, to feel that cold breeze in the summer, to hear the leaves and the birds, to feel the winter sun gently warming my skin and breaking through the clouds... Those are some of my moments. And I imagine never experiencing those things again, and that instant I imagine myself dead I have that certainty that I don't want to lose those tiny moments....I imagine myself in a dark barren land begging for a second chance to feel those tiny instants; like craving for a drop of water in the middle of the desert....
The thing is that we don't find the tools/opportunities to experience MORE of those moments. For example, I loved a friend of mine and she was, during my darkest days, the only reason to go to school; I wanted to see her... I still felt that life sucked, that this unbearable pain would not go, that nobody cared, that it was too cold outside and that it was too hard to move... but just seeing her moved something inside of me: it moved me to do something. Therefore, it's my opinion that we don't want to die, we want to live, but we don't know how to do it. And the ironic part of it is that NOBODY KNOWS HOW TO LIVE... but we are, as a society, afraid to acknowledge that. Imagine if in school they would teach us to appreciate ourselves and the things in life along with Language and Mathematics? I think we want to live. PS I'm writing this while unable to sleep because of all the things in my mind, heart and soul, this is one of those darkest moments.
"I think if I stick it out another year, I can get through this" "You may get through it, but you'll never be 37 again". I needed this. I'm going to the doctor tomorrow. I'll never be 26 again.
i hope you're doing well
Hi I have a question does the doctor really helps I know it sounds ridiculous but I hope you answer my question
@@lojisnailsi9751 you should try it if it's available to you. it works for a lot of people, medication, for other people no medication has ever worked but therapy did. it's entirely personal but like i said if you have the ability, do it. i love you, stay strong
@@charlottestewart1851 you're so sweet thank you I think I'll go
I'm turning 26 in a month. I've lost several years to depression. I hope things have improved for you, I hope you're well. Be strong.
Whoever is reading this right now… we will probably never meet but I wish you all the best in your life! Some things could be very problematic due to the current situation, but keep fighting for your goals and dreams! You can do anything you want! Have a nice day!❤️
I wish you all the best too! God bless you💜
Thank you, the same to you should you ever read this. If one person answers a few other people, perhaps we can bring a bit of cheer to each other. You made me feel better, and connected to someone, just for these few moments. Every day seems dreary, but I am always curious if tomorrow might bring something new.
What a bunch of BULLSHIT
Depression kills dreams.
I'm gonna manifest vitality and live the dreams that are once dead.
The "lifted veil" feeling is the worst part. Depression feels like an awful clarity, sort of like "why didn't I realize before how pointless life is?" And it's not some subtle suggestion of doubt; it's an overwhelming flood of fear and despair. It's like an emotional suffocation, where even the memory of contentment and happiness is vague and elusive. Sadness doesn't feel like that. Depression is horrifying.
I have that same thing going on right now. But let's hang in there and keep on looking for solutions to our problems!
Christian Vallejo
One more thing. When spider, bee.. bites you, you have physical and mental discomfort , same like after bad salad in a restaurant are also symptoms of mental mood. When you have groggy body, lack of necessary ingredients, after junk food, alcohol, cigarettes you have big chance to develop stress and depression ... you're very vulnerable to mental collapse.
Give yourself just two weeks to honestly prove that I'm wrong.
I do not have the benefits from this, just simply I need to give back.
If you manage to do this, it'll save a lot of people.
I'm not sure exactly what point you're trying to make. Are you refuting my urge to be optimistic about the situation? If that's the case, then let me remind you that in the video, he said that he was fascinated by the fact that those who seemed to have the worst depression were also the most persistent in finding a solution and took every chance they had to cling to vitality. If someone has a mental illness, then it's understandable why they can't function normally, but they need to still be willing to solve the problem.
ponyphonic _"why didn't I realize before how pointless life is?"_
THIS. This is exactly one of the components of depression.
***** No doctor necessary.
Let me start by saying that feeling depressed at times is normal and no cause for alarm or treatment. Unless you're somehow magically insulated from life, losses, failures, disappointments, all have their effect. When it becomes a problem is when a state of depression goes on long enough to where it changes your brain chemistry. Your brain chemistry can also predispose you to depression due to past habits and lifestyles (alcohol and other recreational drugs). Even the way you think can create chemical changes.
So, the only real cure is to reverse the processes that got you there. You reverse the unhealthy lifestyle (poor diet, lack of sleep, lack of exercise, lack of sunshine, etc), the unhealthy thoughts (frustration, anger, self pity, as opposed to training the mind to an attitude of gratitude), and you adopt a sense of purpose or mission in life (in other words, you're more than some accidental collision of space dust that simply lives for the sake of self-indulgence until it expires).
I can't do the subject justice here. I do know, however, from personal experience, that there is real light at the end of the tunnel, and there's no quick cure or pill that'll take the place of a real recovery. Get the book I mentioned ("Depression, the way out" by Neil Nedley) and start reading. And if you need something to get you over the hump (the total lack of motivation), find a friend who'll support you in dragging you out to get some exercise. That alone can do wonders for brain chemistry.
“I felt a funeral in my brain”- I relate.
yeah not over dramatic at all.
Emily Dickinson
@@pavanmutyala695 ask your mom about Dickinson.
OP I knew her by Apple TV plus series Dickinson, thanks for your concern
Hey baby!
I believe this TedTalk saved my life as a teenager when I first was experiencing depression. I got onto medication, began my social [and soon medical] transition as a transgender man, went to college, and overall experienced a recovery period. I thought I was doing well early last year, so I worked with my psychiatrist to wean off of my medication. In the fall, I began to fall into a severe depressive episode. I am wrought with feelings of dread, hopelessness, isolation, and harsh self-judgement. Turning on this video again, I listen to the words that so heavily impacted me as a teenager and now, as a 26 year old, I am so relieved. Because this time, I really have thought my depression was some kind of epiphany or awakening, that I was seeing reality and everyone else refused to see it. What a horrifying thing to believe. If I have to watch this video every day to remember that my depression is lying then that's what I'll do. Thank goodness.
He speaks and... surprisingly he speaks. It's continuous, never-ending; no thought can flow out of you before his next idea is presented. There is no stutter nor is there a minor inconvenience that can fluctuate our hearing. He is certainly great at speaking.
The worst part of the day is when I realize I am waking up.
That was me a few months ago, what I did was find the source, for me it was the overwhelming amount of homework I had to do because I was in advanced high school classes called the IB programme. I absolutely hated waking up and remembered wanting to die almost every day. I had always done well in school and usually top of my class, but in the programme, I was one of the worst students grade-wise. This caused me to hate myself more which caused worse marks and as you probably know, depression is a feedback loop. I talked to my friend about it and he truly understood because he has suffered from it.
This may not work for you but the biggest impact of getting out of my depression was getting out of the IB programme, I was extremely grateful that I could go back to regular school and that I could talk to my friends.
@@josephlouwerse2105 I haven't had to worry about homework for more than thirty years now.
yeah its even hard to sit up straight on the bed because its meaningless ..feels like there is no point in breathing , depression is a fuckin monster man
@@xtensionxward3659 What has helped me in those moments is to just keep breathing. Wen I'm breathing I'm still alive.
Painfully, I agree.
His manner of speaking is incredible. HE is incredible. He doesn't seem to belong in this age, but I'm glad he's here.
I feel his manner of speaking is one of a depressed person who's every breath is physically and emotionally straining.
Seems like he is a poet
He reminds me of T.S. Elliot
His rhythm is very similar to the late great David Rakoff
I disagree. I couldn't get through the first 3 minutes. The way he speaks is just so, so gloomy.
“The opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality. And it was vitality that seemed to seep away from me in that moment.”
Never have I resonated with something so much in my life.
I can say, that I am over depression. My cure was finding out what a depression is, and how it affects me. Knowing how it affects me made me able to prevent the sadness. Depression taught me so much about life and myself. It made ma a wise person. Such a wise person that I no longer feel like I belong to society. Everybody seem so childish and foolish. Now I feel very alienated. I struggle to talk about my emotions, and what I've learned, because nobody understands. They dont know anything.
25:48
@@L4wr3nc3810 touché
Cognitive Behavior Therapy?
Agree... it's like you finally see the truth and you just watch everybody else "play their game"...
It's almost like coming out of a psychedelic trip.
His memories with depression could be seen through his eyes and heard through his voice.
How he is doing now could be felt through his smile.
incredibly so, I love his smile in a special way
what a really nice comment
He has a beautiful smile and I pray he is doing well through the pandemic. This period is especially difficult for people with depression and anxiety.
Brother. I know right? I just started shoving a waterfall down my eyes, as I had explained my experience???
Robin Williams
Depression is the coldest winter of any humans life
Now i understand why i can't feel cold since i got depression
yet another person trying to be poetic
Cold Winters are great though
@@muh88 dude , same here. And people around me thinks I have some kind of thermoregulation issue
@@Markovnikov90 lol , i swear yesterday i hanged out with my family and they disturbed me to wear more clothes😂😂
I suffer from PTSD from childhood, and my time in the military and his acute anxiety he spoke on around 3 mins has been the last two years of my life. I am constantly in fight or flight and feel scared all the time. When I feel any relief I just feel so tired from living on constant edge IF I feel any relief. I’ve used alcohol, weed, hallucinogens, and even my phone to try and combat this and feel some sense of togetherness or love, but now that none of those things are apart of my life I realize how alone we all really are. I’m resilient and will keep trucking on, I just put this here to help maybe just one reader who is struggling realize they aren’t alone.
Emotionally, it's like looking through a window, even though you're in the same room. You recognize those emotions, but you don't really remember too well how they feel anymore.
"Depression is a family secret that everyone has."
No
@@-_deploy_- ?
@@-_deploy_- Yes
Not everyone has depression
@@-_deploy_- that's not what he's saying. Many people suffer from depression. You probably have people close to you, in your family even, that are heavily affected by mental illness. Even if you dont personally see it. Hope that helps clear your confusion
People always tell me the typical "You know other people are worse off than you. You could have cancer." We might not have literal cancer, but I often wonder what it would feel like to be dying every day desperately wanting to live, than to be living every day desperately wanting to die. We do have cancer.. just not in the form of a physical tumor and alot slower of a death.
Woah. Yes, James.
I feel both, I live every day desperately wanting to die but I also live everyday desperately wanting to live. It feels like im dying and I cant live, I feel I am in a purgatory where I can watch everyone live and experience life and im floating along watching them unable to live with them.
Chelsea R this is so exactly how I feel wow
You're damn right. It's not like you have cancer, true. But you may want to get cancer because then you would know it will soon end. After all that's the only thing you want. Wishing cancer upon yourself truly says something about how bad depression actually is.
James Atlas I feel you, dont we all have to flight.
"I asked the lord to send me an angel, and he heard my prayers."
I'm not even Christian and I just started sobbing.
You want a medal for being so deep?
@@thefonzkiss What you are doing is being mean-spirited. Say something encouraging instead of humiliating to the person. We are literally watching a video about depression, please be more considerate about the strangers that we know nothing about.
Don't worry @Tracy I'm the same as you are and those words made me remember how my mother tries to hammer the idea of religion into my brain to become more disciplined and how I disliked religion because of that and came to accept that this is how people come to find why they love their own gods/s.
@@thefonzkiss you want a medal for being a 13 year old cringe lord on CZcams?
You don’t have to believe (in anything) to believe (in something).
Don't worry,Angels are not church materials, it's symbolical like love.
I'm watching this after having gone through several episodes of depression, a few prescription medications, and I just cry. I can't helping crying watching this because I feel called out, overwhelmed, but also touched and understood. I'm really helpful that someone can describe how depression feels so well, so that people who dont have it can somewhat understand, and for the people who do have it to know exactly what they are undergoing.
“You don't think, in depression, that you've put on a gray veil and are seeing the world through the haze of a bad mood. You think that the veil has been taken away-the veil of happiness, and that now you're seeing truly.” - Andrew Solomon @10:15 [5.9.2020]
Depression makes a person isolate from the real world because the brain network has some disconnections in some regions. I explained it in a video.
Nature and happiness please stop spamming your own content here. We aren’t here for that.
That was the moment I said "wow", because I'd never heard anyone say that before. But it's true. For me, at least.
That statement crushed me. I broke down, because it is my truth. I feel like nothing matters anyway, and everyone else is ignorant of reality, going about their lives happy. It is truly deep despair. You are drowning.
I want to give this man a standing ovation.
he has a book on depression..
the noonsday demon..
quite well written..read it..
me too, but I'm only one person:(
Technically nothing is stopping you
Stand on the top of your building count 1,2,3 then jump
@@MohibKhanmc on the trampoline and have fun!
You can always overcome depression if you want to, the tricky part is that it makes you unable to want to do literally anything, it makes you paralyzed and completely helpless
What happens when you don't have a family or friends to talk to? I find youtube videos like this to keep going. Thank you 2021
"i felt a funeral in my brain ", that is exactly how depression feels 😢
Maya Sirine you use drugs?
lol that's exactly how it feels I felt it too
True
@@Raventooth then you don't have it. And just because you don't have it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Stop belittling people's illnesses, and playing doctor
@@Raventooth I'm not going to argue with you if you can't see it then oh well.
Every person who believes that the cure to depression is just getting over it and that it's all in your head need to watch this, I have never heard a better explanation
Chloe Iversen j`
You don't simply get over it, I doubt it will ever go away, you just slowly learn to live with it.
But in my experience, it is something that the voice in your head does to you, the voice that we identify ourselves with, the narrator that's constantly being negative and horrible about everything, and we listen to it because we think we are that voice and we have no escape from it.
I became alot less depressed when I learned not to take that voice too serious, because you are not that voice, you are the awareness that is listening to this voice. When you realize this, suddenly the choice appears to ignore this voice so it won't draw you in and take over again. The mind is a powerful tool, but it can also drive you insane if it has too much power.
Chloe Iversen Try Empower Plus/Q96. It will shift everything.
S M Try Empower Plus/Q96. It will shift everything.
@TJ I don't think he was claiming that one was better or worse. Not a competition. It sounded like he wanted to be sure to show that they are both a medical issue of the malfunctioning brain. Like how a nickel and a dime are both money. The nickel and the dime are both money no matter the value.
“The opposite of depression isn’t happiness, it’s vitality” 🤯 truth 💯
He is so adorable when he smiles I tho he where crying at the beginning
I think a major problem with talking about anxiety and depression is that they have been labelled and paired with normal base emotions. So its very easy for people who don't experience clinical depression or an anxiety disorder to think 'I feel these emotions too, it's normal'. If they were referred to them as say Serotonin Deficiency or Amygdala Hyper Sensitivity (just random names I made up) then the general public would know they are distinctively different. As it stands, people often misdiagnose themselves because they think clinical depression is just being depressed about something, when in fact it is closer to a chemical deficiency.
Very true.
It's impossible for people to understand without experiencing it. It's as if your own mind is against you, and the emotions are often so intense that you do actually just want to die to be rid of it. If something terrible happens and you're sad for a few months, but recover, it's different than feeling that sadness intensely for the next ten years as I have.
+Shmandalf Yes i visualized and fantasized about dying peacefully.
Truest thing I've ever read.
Shmandalf I hear u. I keep waiting for my life to begin. I'm 44
This is just, so strangely beautiful and therapeutic to listen to.
Christopher Akridge
agreed.
may I please know how this speech could be therapeutic? I couldn't realize that but knowing an explanation would help me. I need to know, in fact. thank you!
When you are depressed, your view on life is obstructed, if not like just watching the inner of your eye and not really connecting, getting stuck in your thoughts.
As he says "the truth lies".
His clear description of his own experiences as well as other experiences - this over a long time to spread - are intense and offer moments to everybody who has suffered from comparable states of mind to identify with.
Maybe his talk somehow triggers you to feel part of "us", "us" who suffer from depression but of whom many fight to get out of it.
I dunno.
This talk is damn helpful, that's for sure.
agree
One of the best talks I saw. He is so compassionate, balanced, and even funny at the right times. Really feel motivated to read his book.
as someone with major depression and bad anxiety this man rlly described it all this man is 100% right
Wow I've never heard of a more eloquently expressed comparison to anxiety as "like that feeling you have if you slip or trip and the ground is rushing up at you, but instead of lasting half a second like that does, it lasted for six months." So true. That's really how it feels.
+AugustAdvice Everything is scary with anxiety, especially the signs that you are about to have another panic attack.
+AugustAdvice so strange that whenever i slip or trip at work and am really on the verge of some dramatic or catastrophic event i feel the rush of adrenaline and then there is absolutely no depression. it almost feels sometimes like being a kid again. then it's over and my "failed, miserable life" creeps back in again.
+primusayso that is when i'm not preoccupying my mind and the minds of my fellow co-workers with funny tv and stand up quips and kwerks. we all keep each other going at Frisby Tire, 1377 Clyde Ave. Ottawa, ON!!!!!!!!!!!!
+AugustAdvice you have heard a better methapor and i wil tell you where: at the start of the video.
"You may get through it, but you'll never be 37 again. Life is short, and that's a whole year you're talking about giving up."
Sleep is The only cure
Wanna sleep for ever
@@tedstruijk7688 I slept a lot too, when I was depressed. But it's also good to ask for help. Just don't give up on hope.
This hit me hard. This was my mentality at 19. I'm now 24 and nothing has changed. I've made no meaningful progress in anything. I do the same thing, day in day out. I have for the past 5+ years. It's comfortably destructive.
@@fuzzcaster Im 24 too. And 19 was the year it went from dysthymia to major depression and major depression to dissociation, catatonia, and eating issues. I'll never be 20 again. I'll never turn 21 again. I'll never be excited to go to college again (I didn't finish).
What gives me hope, though I vehemently deny my belief in it, is that nothing I do will ever be the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with again. There's no physical pain or emotional abuse that could ever be as bad as depression. Nobody can hurt me like I hurt myself. You're right, it's very comforting in a way.
I'll never get those years back, but looking back I don't want them. In a way I always knew it would have to be like this and I would never risk having to do it all over again. So it's only forward from here, even if it's a waiting game to maybe someday feel better.
This is not only the best Ted Talk I’ve ever heard, it is the best description of depression!!
I love seeing comments from people to each other relating about depression. I only feel feelings for other depressed people, even if they are strangers. I want to hug them all.
anxiety is like playing a video game and hearing menacing music out of no where.... but you cant find any enemies.
*Skyrim battle music plays*
*resident evil music plays*
Ahhh thw satisfaction i feel cause it maches what i feel
"You cannot sleep, when enemies are nearby"
*Minecraft cave sounds*
I'm not depressed, however, this guy has to be one of the best orators I've ever heard
@Essam Mahmood
Consider yourself lucky you’re not depressed. Hopefully you’ll never experience it. Chronic severe depression is one of, if not the most, painful experiences a human being can ever go through. Unless you experienced it yourself, there’s no way you could possibly comprehend what it’s like.
Amazing words. Thank you)
Everything he said was insanely relatable
To experince is to be enlightened.
genuine question. how are you not depressed
I fight depression. I feel like it's this vast deep blue sea in my mind that I tread water in every day, but sometimes, I give into it. Sometimes, I hope i fall completely into it, because it is a blanket of numbness, stillness - it empties me completely, which is terrifying, but can feel better than the pain.
This man speaks well, and says good things. thank you.
As a person who suffers from depression, this makes me feel heard it's like someone completely understands what I've been feeling.
I have a hard time brushing my teeth daily. I dont do my hair or wear makeup but i make sure to shower. Im not making my deadlines but i manage to show up at work. I avoid answering the phone and call back later, sometimes. Bills are overdue, taxes overdue, house not organized, piles of clothes. People asking over and over, Are you ok. What does ok mean. It's so exhausting. If only i didnr have it i could do so much.
I thought I was the only one. I don't have depression, although I have had *a* depression. I just dont want to brush my teeth. It's weird, It is only two minutes but I still just dont have the energy. I do hope you can find a way to get better, maybe try making tiny things out of yarn?
This is completely relatable. Wonderful description. Reach out to a doctor. There are life changing therapies. Don’t wait. Eventually you may give up brushing your teetn, stop showering regularly, and you may no longer be able to show up to work reliably. You could use the motivation you found to write this CZcams comment - a phone call / a message / an email / talking in person is all it takes to start change. Life will be better.
All the best
But you get up in the morning, you take a shower, you go to work, you still get stuff paid. Try not to think about all the stuff you don’t do and think about the stuff you do manage to do because that is what makes you powerful!
Word for word letter for letter this is me
I was a very organized person to the point O.C.D type. I have lt has been 5 years that I can't get my clothes organized as for papers there was a time I avoided going to the mailbox. Now I'm paying the price. But I'm still not giving up. One day at a time. The best accomplishment is I'm no longer depending on alcohol and I'm helping others with their alcohol addiction.
I've had clinical depression since I was thirteen. It's hard to keep a job because not only am I always exhausted and in a rough mood but I also have a physical condition that actually hurts too. I can sleep for 16 and wake up feeling like I haven't slept in days. But the worst part for me is the chronic boredom. Like no matter what I'm just not enthused with what I'm doing. I'll be playing a video game to distract myself and half way through stop playing and just think "why am I even playing this, I'm not even having fun".
People think depression is just feeling sad. But really it's more complex. Your tired, bored, sad, hopless, angry, a bit confused,impulsive,etc.
It sucks.
true
I have severe hits of depression every once in a while, it happens very rarely but when it does I don’t feel anything, just really really hollow
I know the feeling man. Had depression for 5 years (just got better these last months though). I do want to tell you that sleeping 16 hours has the same effects as sleeping like 4 hours. You will feel tired, so I recommend you don't sleep so much.
I don't know what you find enjoyment in (probably nothing at this point), but try to do anything instead of sleeping, it doesn't matter if you don't enjoy it too much, just as long as you don't hate it. Being awake during the day hours and getting sunlight is essential for feeling better too. I wish you the best of luck
I'm some what okay
... what do you do about this feeling when you don't want to do anything?.. in general
This is probably my favorite piece on depression I’ve ever seen. Thank you Mr. Solomon.
This talk helped me a lot to understand my husband ‘s suffering. It was like going inside his psique, so I could simpathize and learn how to deal with his pain…
I could listen to him talk for hours
He sounds like poetry
Especially the part where he reads poetry
Just loop the video. (I know I'm not being helpful)
He needs to be the voice for an audiobook for poetry
Yes but we have to change our our lives. Make decisions and act them out. Try things. Not be scared of failure. And feel connected. That deep loss of connection to other people, hobbies and most importantly to me and my feelings. Stop numbing or ignoring the pain and fight back.
All these things are impossible to do for me at the moment.
I used to love to read, and play guitar, and talk to friends. Now I just pretty much sleep and drink. The world is so sad. I miss life but the world has beaten me down so much.
I feel the same way, I started college this year and it’s been so tough I can barely get my work done
I sleep all the time.
Depression makes everything seem so sad..i don't know why.
@@sallykante5432 life is so beautiful yet we watch it like we are from another planet. I wish i had the answer..bed is my heaven- sleep is my happy place. i do know that you can think you are at the end and you keep going. We are so very much more resiliant than we realize- our bodies actually do want to live- its our freaking heads that don't.
For me it started before developing such hobbies. I was 12.. I don't know what to do.. sometimes it makes me feel awful knowing that others had experiences at these ages.. I feel excluded by experience.
I miss the past when I was excited about something. Now I am always in fear or tired to do anything. My life is full of opportunities. But it seems to me too much work to do anything. I hope to overcome this one day.
Depression is horrible, it gets much worse the more you gaze into it and lose yourself within your own mind. Use your depression, turn it into magnificent thought provoking artworks. Occupy your mind trying to find things that you enjoy, for me personally, conversations with young people like myself help work wonders.
"There is no such thing as love without the anticipation of loss, and that specter of despair can be the engine of intimacy."
"We believe that we are seeing the truth, but the truth lies."
"Shutting out the depression strengthens it. While you hide from it, it grows."
"The opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality. My days are vital, even on the days when I'm sad."
"While I hated being depressed and would hate to be depressed again, I found a way to love my depression.
I love it because it has forced me to find and cling to joy. I love it because each day I decide, sometimes gamely, and sometimes against the moment's reason, to cleave to the reasons for living. And that is a highly privileged rapture."
His face when he makes audience laugh - the connection is lovely
ikr, he just smiles like :D
I love his smile
I wud like ur comment u ur on 420 so I think if shid be left that way
“Depression is the flaw of love” I felt that, I’m terrified of falling in love because It always sends me into a depressive episode
Same
Same
same,, why is that??
This is a situation that obviously needs counselling. It's a huge responsibility having someone else in your life but there is a saying, "It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."
@@heythere2480 fear of being hurt?
I haven't dated anyone for 8 years because my last relationship ripped my heart out.
Prior to that relationship was with someone who stalked me to the point that I had to get a PFA.
Prior to that was my ex-husband who died.
I just can't deal with the pain anymore.
Throughout the video, I am crying. I don't know why
Me too.
Recognition maybe?
I was looking for this comment because I knew I couldn't be the only one
same
Reading other people's comments makes me feel that I am not completely alone with these kind of feelings... Thank you guys🙏
"The opposite of depression is not happiness but vitality", thank you so much for the honesty.
well clearly he has embalmed himself with formaldehyde and had the mortician touch him up. he mst be late for his own funeral. gang gang
Yes, beautifully said :)
Yes. Depression lacks vitality. Depression is not sadness, but emptiness. Depression makes a person disconnect from a real world. The opposite of depression is to go back to the real world.
Nature and happiness you described it perfectly. Exactly how I felt it back then
@@luisterrust Are you feeling better now?
You scrolling through the comments listening & watching this video.
You’re not alone. You are loved, you will be loved. You’re valuable to every one on this earth.
I’ve been living with this for 5/6 years, I take it day by day. Hour by hour. Minute by minute. I hope I’ll be okay.
As you will be too
Thanks....
same to you bruh!
you must get help right now, i've suffered nearly 2 years, hope one day i would be OK, but that day will never come
Tears don't stop
Happy New Year!!!
I think ppl without depression and anxiety need to watch this bc this is how depression and anxiety feel like.
My lord we are not alone! I'm 42 surviving depression for 24 years and anxiety for 7 years. And finally I'm feeling the closer to better mental health. Fighting it until death!
Let's keep going okay? :)
I love your comment. I am still 19, and determined to keep going through the fight.
:')
I'm 21, I've had clinical depression since I was 10 and anxiety for the last five. Even now my hands are numbing as I type...
You're not alone in this!
Good for you! Keep it up :)
Update us on a regular base on your status, I'm a young fellow of your experiencing it, maybe nor severely as yours or maybe more severe. A thing that we may never know, but we can mutually assure that, standing up for one another, without the need of gain or profit is to share the heavy weights that our emotions puts on our shoulders.
This is all too relatable, I actually cried several times while watching it even though I haven't been able to cry in months. We need more speakers like this. The way he talked about depression described it in the best way possible. I wish I could have gone to this TED talk, and that I could've talked with him.
me too man, me too
+Bulla McBullakins :c
your right of feel the same !
You should read his book! Within 25 pages I was hooked to it, crying, sometimes it filled my head with words to describe what I was/am feeling, other times it took my breath away so I couldn't speak and only feel the words I read. The book is very sad and relatable, but it has something hopeful inside too. And it is beautifully written, with loads of detail but without being slow paced or boring (I read the translated version and it was still very, very beautiful.)
What is the name of his book?
11:11 “we’re all going to die in the end”.
That was the preeminent thought that I could not get rid of when I had my “nervous breakdown” at the age of 21.
I had just finished college and knew that my grades weren’t enough to get me into medical school. It was as if the world was over for me, as if my life was over and I was facing the end.
Hey! Hope you're doing good now
Look forward to death because it’s the end of all issues and problems
This video wrapped it’s hand around my heart and didn’t let go until it finished.
"I felt a funeral in my brain, and mourners to and fro kept treading and treading 'till I felt that sense was breaking through. And when they all were seated, a service like a drum kept beating, beating until I felt my mind was going numb. And then I heard them lift a box and creek across my soul with those same boots of lead again and space began to toll, as if the heavens were a bell, and being--an ear and I and silence. Some strange race wrecked solitary here. Just then a plank in reason broke, and I fell down and down and hit a world at every plunge, and finished knowing then."
--Emily Dickinson
What a great piece of poetry.
Occasionally Wrong Thankyou very much sir
Aween The Shooter *Ma'am, but no problem lol
I'm good with English and I don't get this.
spiritfired- what do you not get about it??
It’s been 26 years and counting. My soul is so tired. So very, very tired.
Me too,i felt like 80years old,dying inside
I'm 27 years old, and I've been depressed for 27 years. My younger brother was depressed just like me. He committed suicide a month ago today. He was 26 years old. He never sought help. And help never reached out to him. I feel your pain. I hope you find the help you need. But I'm just a stranger on the internet, and don't know you personally. I hope you can keep fighting and know hope is there... even if you can't see it.
May God cure us all
@Diego Barnhill I’m so sorry. :(
@@Urine_Urine_Urine
I’m so sorry for your brother and for you that you lost someone so dear to depression.
Depression is something that can’t really be explained to people who aren’t going through depression themselves. You only understand if you have depression yourself.
There is comfort in knowing there are people just like you who do understand what it’s like to carry this pain. You’re not alone.
I always comeback to this. It makes me feel not dead, more connected
There should be a way we can connect to each other, all of these people, so alone, scared, hurting. We all are suffering from the same thing, mainly loneliness, no one to listen or care---how could we change this? I am really asking, I have suffered for 55 yrs, it is heartbreaking to see so many that will go through what I did, or perhaps be successful in their attempts to end it.
@@deni9626 I just saw this. I have 28 and still fighting it. therapy, meditation, journaling, psychiatrist (meds), and perhaps this past 3 months its been the longest period oof time i have not wanted to die/kill myself/imagine my dead. But today I came close. I did not relize I was so close to it, until today. You know.. the thing about a depressive episode/relapse is that it comes in quitely.
At least us answering here to others can be a community i guess :c
"You don't think in depression that you've put on a gray veil and are seeing the world through the haze of a bad mood... You think that the veil has been taken away, the veil of happiness, and now you're seeing truly."
"Depression was something that was braided so deep into us that there was no separating it from our character and personality."
Never have I ever heard feelings being expressed into words in such a way.
Made me feel a little less alone for a brief moment.
Depression for me is like the feelings that I’m forgetting something important and can’t function without doing it but all the time and that something doesn’t exist. I can’t stop thinking but I’m not thinking about anythingn
Brandon Barber it’s like I’m waiting for something to come and make it better. I’m waiting for the solution to just appear in my mind. But I don’t know what it is. And I don’t know if I ever will.
@@victoriacharlie9017 the thing is at some point of your life , you will realize that that magical thing will never come and make you feel better suddently, the solution will never come to you like that.. For me.. i stopped waiting and waiting for the solution, for the person that might save me from this pain.. and i just stopped waiting cauz i got sick of it. When you stop waiting you stop living in those delusional thoughts, you stop living in the past and in the futur. You just stop everything and look at what you have right now.. "i watched this video and it made me feel better, and realized a lot of things" , " the caissière lady was really nice to me, that was very cute".. im not saying that i found the solution, but im just saying that i stopped hurting myself with my thoughts ( they still hurt tho) anyways idk why m writing this it's 3am but it made me feel better to read the comments
I agree , before experiencing depression I’ve never realized how freeing not thinking can be.
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@@anjadesmarais7808 is it possible to not think