How Foreigners Make Japanese UNCOMFORTABLE (Unintentionally)
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 28. 04. 2024
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Hello everyone! Did you know there are some things that foreigners do that make Japanese feel uncomfortable?? Of course foreigners don't do it on purpose and if they knew, I'm sure they would avoid it! Many Japanese people can look past it, but it's important to know what these things are and why Japanese feel that way!
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How many of these things apply to you? Please don't think Japanese hate foreigners because of it! Japanese people are very easy going and won't fight you or anything for these things! But they might be surprised by it happening, especailly if they don't have a lot of experience around non-Japanese people!
If you like jojo, are you excited for the new episodes coming out soon?
Yes!! But I don't have Netflix to watch it!!
Thanks for the one month free, looks exciting!
Would you use black lipstick đ
Please đđ„ș
Mrs Eats looks like Mr Seats in the Patreon link
I'm an American. I used to visit Japan ever summer back in the 1990s. Once, I was on my own and got terribly lost on the train. I asked a businessman who was commuting home at the end of his day for directions. He didn't "give me directions." Rather, he interrupted his journey home and kindly showed me the way... meaning, he went out of his way to make sure I reached my destination. He actually accompanied me so I wouldn't get lost. Then, he resumed his trip home in the other direction. That blew me away. What courtesy and kindness. Says a lot about a people. I've never forgotten that.
We would all benefit by being more like the Japanese. I learned this when passing through. having lived in the Philippines for five years I met quite a few Japanese in transit and before that I had always heard they were stuck up racist elitist assholes- I found out through my interactions that was a completely false narrative and they turned out to be the most courteous, respectful and intelligent people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I never felt so honored as the time they saw my passport and immediately bowed to me. I was in the smoking room in the airport when a Japanese suit (business man?) Walked in and noticed that every available seat was taken up by someone's luggage even the one next to me which was my backpack so I removed it and he immediately bowed in respect. No one else would do that for him and it was then I realized that we, as foreigners, were the real stuck up entitled elitists. Further on in my travels the courtesy I received from other Japanese travellers was beyond compare and it changed my world view forever.
I am also American, I have born in America, in south America to be more precise. In Brazil. And guess what? Most of countries in America are composed of unites states. But they use to have a name. Why your united states of middle north America doesn't have a name?
Ur probably white or american
I'm compelled to ask, did he accompany you just until the bus/train door.. or traveled with you . !!?
Excuse me đ đ
â@@mrnoone8852I can understand what you think.. but the former Soviet union didn't have a name, the UAE don't have a name, south Africa doesn't have a name..
Try to get over ambiguities, that's all.đ
It's funny how "rest of the world" usually just means "United States" for the japanese. It's neat because the rest of us can have a look at two weird wacky places at once.
lol so true
Apparently when Hollywood heroes try to save the world, the map of the world seems to be only the shape of America.
And when Japanese think about foreigners somehow the same map above applies.
Limrasson - So what are unwierd unwacky place do you live in?
@@michaelallen2971 not just white people, forgeins in general, even other asians, black/dark skinned people def have it the worst tho
@Rachel Forshee Weirdly enough exactly that's what would want me to go there. But I'm from eastern(ish) europe so probably that's why. Still weird for a lot of reasons.
I lived in Japan for a year 30 years ago. One of the first things I did at work was to ask (repeatedly) my colleagues to tell me if I do or say something that goes against Japanese customs. It took a while, but once they realized that I was serious about it, that i wanted to fit in, that i took this serious, everything went much smoother. I can only recommend this approach.
èŻăćșæ„ăŸăă!
What are some things you learned?
@@CiceroSapiens a lot of things
â@@CiceroSapiensand a few would be????
@@Jeremya74I worked with him. One was he need learn to fart out window and not stink up office. Whole floor smell like Hakone.
I was in osaka and at the bars and people were chatting me up and even in small areas in tokyo. I was surprised on how so many japanese people talked to me while I was there, I loved it. We even used google translate at one bar and we still had a great time communicating! I will be back there this month, I cant wait!
how much did it cost you?
@@nikoolay 2 weeks make sure u have at least 3k$
Wow fantastic story !
Well.. how was it this time? Same nice experience? In also planing to ho đ
Crazy, as an American I'm considered quiet, I couldn't imagine going to Japan and suddenly being considered too friendly.
To be honest- if I were in Japan I'd probably be next to mute just because I do not speak much Japanese and would not expect them to speak much, if any, English. I would be nervous and self-conscious trying to speak poor Japanese lol. I will do as much as possible without talking
you wont be considered friendly
@@marvinhoffmann4288 friendly as in *open, affectionate, and personal,* not as in *kind and well-mannered.*
hm, as an European I've never heard someone calling americans quiet. Do you mean you're quiet compared to your American counterparts?
@@kristiansundsfjord4095 You Need to Meet more People from the US then
I went for the first time to Japan before this coronavirus thing started. I am not a fan of big cities so i went down south of Osaka in the Wakayama-shi prefecture for its architecture and access to the beach.
Long story short i got lost trying to find a toy store. I asked a few girls i saw in the bus for directions to head back to the train station and then later on i heard them running behind me towards me. They were worried that i won't find the way back so they walked with me half way there. I then came to an intersection and got a bit worried if i understood which way was right so i asked the only grandma i saw on the street in front of her house for directions. My japanese is not great but i made sure to learn the most politest forms when addressing people. This grandma smiled at me while i was making train sounds (chu chuuu) in hopes she understands me. She started walking with me with the same smile on her face for about 10 to 15 minutes until we got the train station. I was about to pay for the ticket but the train was already there so the grandma told the ticket booth guy something and both of them smiled at me and politely told me to hurry up and get in the train. I didn't forget to respectfully bow to both of them and thank them.
That memory will forever stay with me and it is my reason to visit Japan at least once every few years. The kindness of people goes along way.
That's such a nice story
this is really lovely.. makes me think about my experiences in Ireland, where people are really kind too..
I had a similar story when visiting New York. I asked some young folk how to get to the nearest subway, and they surprisingly kindly showed me and walked with me, even showing me the quicker shortcut through nearby alleys and junctions. Then they sucker punched me and took all my belongings. When I regained consciousness I asked an old lady, the first person I saw, to call help as my phone had been taken. She went to pull her phone out the bag, or so I thought, instead it was pepper spray and she maced the hell out of me.
@@recodegamesstudio is this true?
ok that's very adorable
Japanese, the more I learn about their country and culture the more UNCOMFORTABLE I get as a Foreigner.
Ahahaahah... yeah, thats the right word man
The first time I visited Japan we got a goodwill guide on the first day and he really set us on the right track for a wonderful trip. My Japanese was limited to numbers and a few very basic phrases. The goodwill guide taught me a few basic conversational phrases to start a conversation. He also told me to talk to the younger people because it gives them an opportunity to practice their English. Every Japanese person I met was kind and if they didnât understand English they would politely wave me off. Every young person I talked with would carefully listen as I stumbled through my limited Japanese, and after listening to me attempt to speak in Japanese they opened right up. After all their English was much better than my Japanese.
Itâs funny as a foreigner that has been living in Japan for about a decade, I find that on the trains in Tokyo, many young Japanese people wear strong perfume and cologne. I wear scent less deodorant and as an American, Iâm surprised at how strong their scent is lol. Also when I wear my PokĂ©mon tie to work and I go out for lunch, I often get comments from the Japanese cashier or waitress. Theyâll say things like âyour tie is very cute.â So maybe things are changing in Japan or maybe Japanese people know that they can act differently when interacting with foreigners.
It is possible that, if you look like an obvious foreigner, they figure "If I talk to this person they won't mind because they're foreigners and foreigners talk to strangers."
A lot of these recent "we're not xenophobic buttttt" videos are made by people CZcamsrs who are a little out of touch. This is the 3rd one to cross my recommend for some reason. Most of these are just strange. Most of the younger people don't care if you're a foreigner. The people that are the hardest to deal with are the older crowd but if you speak Japanese to them, most of them will become your best friend. I don't know where these points are coming from. Maybe rural areas?
@@mikeingyu580 It's a shame that Japan is very much xenophobic whether they admit it or not. Most people if not all people I know in America including myself love the idea of visiting Japan or just meeting and befriending Japanese people in general, but literally every single video of a Japanese person trying to explain why they treat foreigners so cold translates to "they don't look, sound, smell or act like us so I want nothing to do with them". Even a lot of the rules they enforce on themselves essentially scream "I hate diversity". Even if you happen to speak fluent Japanese most people you speak with show body language like they're extremely uncomfortable talking to you and can't wait to get away.
@@HideMyStuffPls diversity is not really a big thing amongst Asians.
@@HideMyStuffPls The craziest part about these claims is that it IS xenophobic. I am a happa (half Japanese) and my name is very much Japanese. I was almost worse off for it. Japan is a great place to visit but a terrible place to live if you are not Japanese. It's getting easier but it's lacking a lot. In my opinion, Korea is a lot more friendly towards foreigners and are more open than Japanese about having foreigners visit and even live there. There's some roadblocks (old people = still xenophobic) but you can easily open bank accounts and rent if you want. Plus the cost of living is cheaper than the insane prices of living in a large city in Japan. And on a real note, You can learn Hangul (Korean writing system) in a day.
I have opposite experience in Japan where elders were the ones often initiate small talk regardless where I was (big city or countryside) or what I did. Their constant curiosity and kindness always made my day!
One of my friends had the same experience! And she didn't even speak fluent Japanese, but people went as far as using their phone translators to try talk to her đ„ș even little kids would ask her questions
@@ignacia3628 Positive curiosity can go a long way!
I had the same experience as well. I found that some of the older folks were more likely to initiate a conversation than a younger person.
I'm very happy to hear that there are shared positive experiences in the face of diversity!
Same experience, no matter where I went (country side) old or young generation, Japanese are interested in a conversation. You just need to learn few Japanese words, and then they feel comfortable to speak English. Also they suggested to do something together afterwards.
Iâm autistic, and I love the lack of small talk. Here in Aotearoa/NZ people talk about nothing as a matter of course. Itâs considered polite. Itâs friendly, but I donât like it. Eye contact too.
Dumbass culture, in Finland we dont do those things, if some stranger start talk to me i think is this person mentally ill what do they want from me why are they talking to me, do they wanna rob me
Iâm Aspie, holidays in Japan are awesome. Generally ASD standards of politeness are very compatible if you do some basic research. We do tend overshare too much though, but Japanese people politely say itâs straight forward and refreshing. Lack of direct eye contact is great in Japan whereas in Australia they need it to feel comfortable.
Aspies love structure, we have to play by other peoples rules that donât always make sense (NTs understand them instinctively) so once you know the rules itâs fine.
We also have sensory issues so the lack of heavy scents is great. Eat simple Japanese food and your sense of smell sharpens, unfortunately when you go home the smells hit you and it takes some getting used to.
Yeah, Fully Agree.
I, also, hate eye contact but doesn't mean that I'm not listening
the amount of social pressure and over-friendliness in the west is not that good for autistic people in my opinion... they just want to be understood or want to be alone for at least a few hours, so speaking for long hours feels more of a chore than a fun time. that's why i like East-Asian (Japan but also including Korea, China and Taiwan) Culture.
It depends on the person, but i truly feel that Asian people won't put many pressure on you if you don't want to talk that much.
I don't know a lot about NZ, but in my country (Israel) people just being WAY to open to the point it's just creepy
they will say whatever they want to you even if it's insulting and act like a cicada in your ears until you listen to them...
trust me, there's nothing more annoying than to listen for long long hours to a conversation you hate..and when you ignore the person he just won't shut up until you reply.
Also, favorite countries in the world top 5 are..
1th, Japan
2th, Taiwan
3th, Thailand
4th, China (Mainland, As for Hong Kong i like it but it's really expensive there)
5th, South Korea
Last thing though, Before I'll move to japan for the working holiday (and from there change my nationality) I'm going to reside in Chengdu or Chongqing for half a year
Sorry this comment is really long, but please wish me luck!
That's interesting, I've heard other autistic people say the same but personally I'd find that polite formal vibe really unsettling, I need clear feedback not hints. I'm from Yorkshire UK where strangers do chat, usually superficial but friendly. Tbh I felt more at home socially in Russia where people only start conversation if they are genuinely interested (no small talk) and seemed very direct / blunt.
@@edm3784 Yea that's another way to look at it
Thank you so much for making this video! This information is great, I have been watching many other videos on etiquette and rules in Japan and have not heard about any of this!
America is interesting regarding smells because there's definitely STRONG feelings around them, but rather than wanting to not smell at all, Americans want to smell GOOD. Body odors are offensive, so products are made to provide strong, pleasing scents instead. Scents communicate femininity or masculinity, even wealth at times. Interesting cultural differences.
Those products should be used to enhance your nice smell, not mask it. Good hygiene is most important.
I so much prefer that to the european approach. OMFG I had to hold my breath when I had to dance with this french girl at salsa class, also in a hostel in japan there was a somewhere-in-europe guy (german or french maybe) in our room who smelled like hell too, thank god we had planned to go to the beach for the very same period he stayed.
I'm so glad in my country most people take a shower and use deo every day
Idk. I'd much rather smell nothing than smell artifical crap that smells "good".
@@chelseaoocandy Of course! I just think this is the reason behind strongly scented shampoos and soaps. Good smells carry the connotation of good hygeine, even if that's not the case. I'm not sure why that's the case, culturally.
@@shorthopdoublelasers4168 A lot of people would agree with you. I've heard many complaints from Americans who are sensitive to strong smells and get headaches from them, so they avoid malls or other places with strong perfumes. It's such an interesting phenomenon!
"It's actually easier to move away from someone that's making you uncomfortable than it is to tell them directly."
I felt that in my soul.
Sounds like dating. When no response means you have been dumped.
Coward
That's sad
@@gustavo320 No it's why Japan is better than most countries by a mile. Avoiding conflict as there's never any good that comes off of it.
@@Very-ImportantPerson your perspective. I'd rather go to a happy place
I'm so glad to hear about smell harassment. I hate when I'm at the office and you can smell someone's fragrance. It's never a good one either.
Better then the smell of sweat.
I live in japan for 6 years now and I never followed these rules except for the shaving one. I use colognes and deodorants from America, specially during the summer, I usually get tons of compliments from my Japanese coworkers and I even recommended a few colognes to them. Because summer is so hot in japan there are quite a few people (mostly men) that smell extremely bad and that's everywhere. I'm sure people prefer someone smelling fresh then someone stinky
If you got TONS of compliments from your Japanese coworkers for your cologne then many of them are probably trying indirectly to tell you it's very noticeable and you should tone it down... It's like fat people hearing "Wow! You foreigners have big appetite!"
@@porpo-donut There's nothing good for y'all. I'd rather use cologne or deodorants rather than smell bad
It's because unlike europeans, most asians don't generate bad odor. There are CZcams videos regarding this and has something to do with genetics.
@@trident8 if you ride in the subway here during the summer you wouldn't think like that hahaha
â@@trident8A single individual doesn't smell too bad. A whole lot of 'em in one place stinks to high Heaven.
If only "perfume harassment" was a thing in my country. I have a few coworkers who smell like they took a bath in perfume.
Just say to the offending person: "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"
Maybe they get the hint.
Even in the US, people who use really strong perfume can be seen as a douches or are trying to hide the fact that they didn't shower
You could tell them. I was the offending part in this myself, but I didn't know it. A work colleague and a friend both told me my deodorant wearing was too strong, which surprised me. I later discovered my sense of smell is weaker than that of most people, so what for me was a weak scent, for others was strong. Hadn't they told me, I wouldn't have known this. My solution then was simple, I switched to a no-fragrance deodorant and have used that one since them, which was a pure win-win: I keep sweat-free, and no one smells anything.
I grew up in the 70s/80s and perfume/cologne was a thing most people wore it OK but older ladies wore more probably couldn't smell as well so were not aware. But even into the mid 1990s there was a big CK Be/CK One cologne trend. I don't mind it if it's done well, but in the US and Canada as with coffee most people go overboard. Perfume can be a good thing even recall my first grade teacher if I smell that perfume. Scent is a powerful thing for memories good or bad.
Trust me it's better than having no perfume at all. My colleague smells like a fucking hobo
Yes when I was in Osaka I was on the train and my ticket was all in Japanese. A man next to me saw me trying to figure out where to get off he spoke great English and helped me out. He translated my ticket and showed me my next train. Amazingly great guy.
They may be nicer than Canadians and Scandinavians on average.
Something similar happened to me, the man even got off with me and showed me where the connecting train terminal was. It wasn't even his stop but he still got off to show me.
That person could be a foreigner who lives in Japan tbh
in most countries that is normal hospitality in japan it is a one in a million
Aww!! Thats so nice! Im glad he helped you out! đ
Well done Mrs Eats and thank you. I was in Japan for a month in 1985, as part of a UN multicultural youth celebration. I returned 4 years later for another "Japanese culture research trip." These experiences completely opened me to exploring how Japanese and other cultures "meet" - I even made a Masters Degree study of it in the UK. Your video is excellent and it touches on just a tiny amount of "cultural differences" that we all need to learn about, be aware of and respect. ăăăŸăăŠăăă§ăšă
Very enlightening. I think the biggest problem I would have is worrying if I am being impolite if I don't know the rules and make a social error. Here in the US we will sometimes refer to them as social norms. It is also interesting how people are oblivious to the social rules of other countries when they visit those countries, and are somehow offended when asked to try to follow them. As you noticed when you were in New Zealand they have different social rules, just as in the US ours are also different. In the US people are uncomfortable if one does not make direct eye contact. Different cultures can be interesting and a great way to learn about a country and it's people.
I've only been to Japan once in my life. It was when I was in the service and I was on leave. A Japanese man just came up to me to ask for something and started chatting with me. Before the evening was done he took me on a walking tour of Yokota, by night, and introduced me to some of the nightlife. It was delightful and that was 55 years ago, but I still remember it fondly. We had octopus from a food cart, and had drinks in several different clubs. Granted, I paid for it, but I was just delighted with how outgoing and friendly this man was. Okay, he was a little drunk when I first met him, but before the evening was over, so was I. He must have been the an unusual example of a Japanese man to be so outgoing. All in all it's one of my better life memories.
That's awesome
Sounds like that Japanese guy was running a good hustle.đ Glad you both enjoyed it though.
What a wonderful memory. I was in Japan for the three months of spring this year, 2023 and my guess is that this fellow was hungry to break out of his rule bound upbringing and that you were just as refreshing a change for him as he was for you, different from most of Japanese society. A perfect union to cherish. In case you have any inclination to revisit, fairs are cheap to Japan right now and currently the US dollar is very strong against the yen.
@@cherihoffer1129Thank you for that reply. It's always gratifying to know that somebody is actually reading the things that I post. I'm 77 years old now, and these videos on CZcams trigger a lot of memories. Mostly good ones like this, and I like to share them in the hopes that somebody might enjoy hearing them, even if they are just personal memories.
stories like these are so heartwarming, so many stories in the world
Here in Germany we don't talk to total strangers without a reason. Small talk is very unusual here and if you don't have anything to say important or interesting to each other, you usually don't say anything. and our direct way of speaking is considered rude by many other cultures.
As an American in NL and Northern Belgium, it was generally easy to start random conversations because the English is pretty good. (even though my 2nd language is Dutch). Lol. They just have to warm up a bit.
Gen Z cannot communicate effectively and lack social skills anyway.
@@GUITARTIME2024yeah being in belgium and denmark alcohol really helps things along haha. Though I was also with a fairly young cohort both times, and younger generations tend to be in general more open with each other foreign or otherwise
Bro what!? I live in Austria and people talk to themselves and are offended most of the time if you don't say Hi or make eye contact đ„Čđ but the last part is kinda true even after 10+ years living here đ
â@Yammy560 I think that within the germanic culture, Austrians are on the more talkative end than e.g. people from the north sea or saxony. Not a huge difference, but noticeable, imo.
Thank you so much! We are planning a trip for September and this video has talked about things no other video about etiquette/manners. This is very helpful!
Thank you for sharing these insights!! Much appreciated
the first time I visited Japan, I expected everyone to be kind, but I also understood that they may not be super talkative to a foreigner. I was very surprised when I had a ton of people asking me where I was from, and trying to talk to me all the time. When I told people I was from Texas, my most common response was, "oh, danger!". Everyone was very kind and my first meal in Japan was payed for by a man who saw me struggling with a japanese menu and helped me order.
They are especially talkative when you join them for drinks. So much fun!
Thank you for sharing your experiences. We'd love to visit Japan but we are afraid of offend while we visitđâ€
That's the same experience I've had.
âOh, dangerâ is a perfect representation of Texas đ (speaking as a born and raised Texan)
Hmm may I ask which part of Japan did you visit?
@@aarizmushtaq4301 I visited Tokyo, Kyoto, Osaka, Kobe, Nara, and Hakone. Talked mostly with people in Tokyo, Kyoto, and Osaka. Actually made a few friends in Osaka and Tokyo that I still talk to and meet up with when Iâm in town.
âWe are not racist! We are merely disgusted by foreigners in a passive-agressive way! Except if they are Chinese. We are pretty open about being disgusted by them.â
HAHA I don't blame you really the world is a vulgar place, and as an American I vouch for us being the worst, I will be more mindful about my scent from now on it was an enlightening video.
@@williamrice6770 speak for yourself. Iâm American, and I am Gods favorite son. The bees knees. And my body odor is subtle and alluring.
CZcams open
@@williamrice6770 We're not the worst
Really, for yr info, the Chinese are also bluntly disgusted by the attitude of some foreigners esp., if they are Japanese & we wonât hesitate to tell them off.!, bro.
This is amazing! I have learned a lot and laughed so much!
Iâve been around the world, but never to Japan. I really would love to spend a year there. A quiet year immersed in the culture. Work all day, every day on a graphic novel. Iâve always been so impressed and inspired by Japanese, culture.
I've lived in Japan over 20 years. When I decided to grow a beard, I first asked my boss if it was okay with them, and told them that if it looked bad, they could tell me and I would shave, but my boss just laughed said her father had had a long beard, so she had no problem with beards. In fact, after I grew my beard, I had a lot of compliments from Japanese people, many of whom said I looked better with a beard.
đđđ bro they were yanking your chain. More beard less face
I think itâs cuz youâre white? Are you white though?
I wonder this myself. If its a specific type of beard, like been unkempt, that is the problem. Cause passing by Japan, I had something between short boxed beard and a 5 o' clock shadow. And got complemented. Even hit on, and one of the things considered an attractive quality was my beard. When in reality I simply didn't have razors, my small trimmer, I leave the battery inside and it blew up traveling. So only had the bigger one that can't give me the fully smooth shave, and those dots annoy me more. So kept a groomed beard.
But, then again, been a foreigner probably just make me looked "exotic" to them. Which that alone could change someones perception.
After all, I only remember 2 other persons with facial hair. A middle age men with a stubble beard, and petite goatee, similar to the one the guy in the video stocked to his face... Now I'm wondering if it was fake as well. XD
@@rufiredup90 i know people of all races that have long beards đ
@@gokuvegeta7770 he meant Japanese hold white people in higher esteem than darkies of other races, its just facts
During my visit to Japan a few years ago I was abiding to all these rules, and it was ok. I was able to not annoy anyone (at least to my perception) until I went to a music venue to listen one of my favorite composers of all time... and the show organizer (a japanese dude around his 30s) received me with hugs and cheers. He broke every single of these rules, invited me beer, talked to me about random things, laughed and introduced me to his friends... it was... surreal. I think the shock was so big that I kinda got glassy eyes. That interaction was so unexpected and "out of place" that it became the highlight of my visit there. Hope one day I can go back...
These "rules" seem to be subjective. I've met plenty of extroverted Japanese who care nothing about such rules. As the lyric goes "rules are alright, if there's someone left to play the game."
Haha, I encountered a couple of men with free hugs sign at Shibuya.
They were enjoying themselves, but when I approached for a free hug, they jumped back all scared.
Lucky my friends told them that I was with them and that I'm familiar with environments where free hugs are offered (like cons).
The men relaxed. I got my hug and they got this story of that foreigner they met that's even weird than themselves.
@@jjryan1352 Ive never heard that before and I love it!
The show organizer told everyone that he's a big shot who even hired a foreing celebrity for that day .
It costed him only a beer LOL
Wait till you realize that in Shibuya and Shinjuku all those dudes standing around especially in Kabukicho, are usually selling and carrying Methamphetamine, needles, cocaine, and marijuana. Also LSD and MDMA is super easy to get in Japan. Actually getting hard drugs in Japan is easier than it is in America. You literally can find thousands of dealers in Twitter if you search for the slang terms in Japanese. Its the most hilarious shit even
This video is helpful information. Thank you for this lesson.
What an incredible video! I enjoyed the editing, humor, your perspective of being Japanese and going to a more western country. It was also very interesting for someone who likes Japan and is interested in the differences to more western countries
I am a Norwegian, and we are probably more reserved than many other Westerners. During a holiday in San Francisco I was surprised and delighted that random people would stop me in the street just to have a conversation. An unusual experience to me, but I really liked it.
That is a very, very regional/ state and even city level difference. In my area in Ohio waiting in lines, etc... We'll kick up conversations, but about 30 minutes west not so much. Suggestion look up early 1900's immigration settlement maps. It is really cool, because with new immigrants they pool together. For instance Deerfield, MI a large Muslim population, so when people are immigrating if first generation they go to a like minded area. It is around 3rd generation that people are fully integrated and move outside of ethnic migration spots. My area very German, Polish, and Hungarian. Plus, whenever I meet someone visiting from another country. I genuinely care about knowing more about their culture from a first hand experience. Plus, I know how much travel costs, so if even here on business I'm happy to make recommendations to help people enjoy the area better.
I ask questions so as to find the person's interest to recommend according to their preferred interests.
I would be interested to find out how your feelings/thoughts would change or evolve with time, if you were to live there, etc. Typically one's attitudes evolve with length of stay and the nature of the stay.
Be real, most people here are absolutely annoyed by workers with the constant âis there anything I can help you with?â
@@gunkanjima3408 I disagree. After I've been greeted, yes other attempts annoying, but if I'm not acknowledge I won't spend my money there.
As an American, I hate people stopping me and talking to me. Or giving me compliments as I walk the streets. Like just leave me alone. It makes me feel like they want something from me
About shopkeepers talking to strangers, there are exceptions. I bought a suzuri (ink stone) and some other calligraphy material in Kyoto, and the shop owner, an adorable old lady, was so surprised she asked me where I am from and what I was doing (she then confessed she thought I might have been a foreign Buddhist monk visiting some local monastery, as I do have le physique du role đ), but then we went on talking for about half an hour, and she sort of told me all about her family and her life!
Of course, fluent Japanese, with also some grasp of the Kandai dialect, is a must to unlock this kind of experience.
Nice! đ Iâve had similar experiences with older people, especially if they are the owner of the establishment. I think the âno chitchatâ rule is mostly true for chain places though - staff have a manual with specific rules about how to talk to customers. (One exception to this is Starbucks. They actually chat with customers, from my experience.)
I've noticed the further from Tokyo the friendlier. Or at least they are pretty friendly in Kyoto and Osaka.
@@chelseaoocandy Have you spent any time In Shizuoka? In my experience that was one of the friendliest places in Japan, at least as far as complete strangers talking to you.
@@Jordan-inJapan I haven't, sounds wonderful! I'll be sure to
The combini near my work all of the employees make small talk. Sometimes they give me gifts even! Theyâre the nicest people. I wonder though if itâs because I donât live in Tokyo. I think Kanto people are generally less warm towards strangers.
I worked in a store in a tourist destination city frequented by a lot of foreign tourists. The Japanese were my favorite ones. They were polite and very friendly. I had a few good conversations with some of them on multiple subjects, fishing, food etc.
I'm American and I relate to a lot of what was mentioned in the video. Sometimes it feels like I align better with certain aspects of Japanese culture compared to my own. The first time that I went to Japan, it finally felt like I was surrounded by like-minded people (to an extent). All of a sudden, I'm not the quietest person in the group, most of the people that I meet take public transit, and everyone keeps the trains clean.
I am not outgoing or social enough for Americans, and I've always struggled forming friendships because of it. I don't like anything with fragrance (deodorant, laundry detergent, skincare products, etc). Even when I started puberty in middle school, I did not understand why deodorants had fragrance. My thoughts back then were, "Aren't the deodorants supposed to remove the odor? Why are they adding more smell?". (The best unscented deodorant that I've found that actually prevents odor is from a brand called LumÄ.)
Anyway, I'm aware of the social and political problems that exist in Japan. I'm not the kind of person who idealizes Japan or Japanese people, but it's nice to know that some of my mannerisms and opinions on how a society should function would be considered normal in another country. I think that the global appeal of Japan is that a lot of people have similar views on things like cultural etiquette, public transit, and city planning that aren't found in other countries.
Stop
Okay, I'm fascinated to know more about the etiquette of "pubic transit" you found in Japan? Does this happen on public transit as well? How should one guard against it, lol?
Japan is a country that has preserved culture, sensibility, decorum and has for this reason kept me returning regularly to her shores.
Ugh, people like you are so annoying.
no you are not
This explains a LOT about how the two Japanese classmates I had in college acted. Never making eye contact, the terrified expressions when I'd say "what's up bro" in the mornings đ. And all this time I thought it was the general fear a lot of people have around a big black dude (I'm 6'4" 245lbs)
Big boy gang đȘ
Asians are intimidated by black people alot bro
S T R O N K
That's all in your head bro...
oh they likely fear you too, don't be fooled. Likely call you Bob Sappu when you are not around.
Reading the comments made me realize how nice people are in Osaka. I remember being lost in Osaka and this nice older gentleman stopped to help me. He was so nice and said âI know a little English, I can help you. You look lostâ as a Mexican it scared me at first. (In Mexico people that approach you usually want money or to scam) But when I realized he was going out of his way to help a random stranger, it completely warmed my heart â€ïž Thank you đđ» stranger đ„°you were a blessing âșïž
For me it was Hiroshima. I was walking alone down the street looking for a place to eat, but every sign was in Japanese and I felt shy. All of a sudden a middle aged couple stopped me in the street asking me where I was from and if I wanted to come eat sushi with them (they knew the chef). At first I was a little nervous, but they often spoke to and guided foreigners around. They had themself lived abroad for many years and enjoyed speaking to foreigners. They were so friendly towards me and sooo hospitable! They showed me around Hiroshima and I will treasure those memories and their friendliness for the rest of my life âš
Osaka is beeing known by beeing free talk people on the streets. If they see you are having problem, as a foreigner, before you come to them they will come to you first and ask where you want to go or such questions. And ,as long, as you good enough, they will stick to you and help!)))
Y si algun dia Usted va a visitar Escandinavia (de donde soy yo), es lo mismo situacion aqui. Si alguien quiere ayudarle, seguramente es que les encantan ayudar
Ok thank you for spreading bad stereotypes about your own people. Not all foreigners are so marvelous and not all people in your own country are bad.
WOWWWW Mexico is full of hospitality, it may have been your attitude
Thank you so much! This was fantastic
Wow wonderful video! Thank you for the advice!
My grand mother is Colombian and she lived in the us for a few months while studying. She met a Japanese girl named Yuka. When she learned her name, my grand mother told her that in Colombia there is a vegetable called yuca (which is pronounced the same). They were friends for weeks and then one day they were passing through a market, my grand mother saw some yucas and showed them to her. Yucas look like a big ugly brown carrot or potato. My grand mother meant no harm but the girl was so offended that she compared her name to the ugly vegetable that she never talked to her again. đđđtoo different cultures
Thatâs the saddest story I have ever heard omg
Thatâs not 2 different cultures, thatâs a sad woman that needs to get a Grip
Sounds funny to me
Your grandmother should be happy to end relations with someone so stupid
Some Japanese people are so delicate and yuca is yumiii no ugly đ
These rules are very interesting! Here in Italy, for example, colognes/perfumes play a huge role in shaping a person's sex appeal. Wearing perfume is synonym of elegance, attractiveness.
Which is funny because a lot of North Americans/parts of Europe consider excessive cologne to be tacky and low-class.
I agree. It is also recommended for uplifting your mood. They say to use a little perfume or cologne before you go out to feel better about yourself, to get a better self-esteem. Using a personal scent is considered an expression of self-love and self-care. It's a mood enhancer.
@@danielbroome5690 They said wearing perfume, not taking a bath in perfume. I'm Italian and I can say we like 1 puff of perfume, too much and you'll just annoy everyone. Excess are always a bad thing.
@@danielbroome5690 note how you wrote 'excessive' and also how she didn't mention 'excessive'.. don't compare frogs and rocks please
True, but in Italy they do that, like almost everything, with style and class, so the amount of perfume is appropriate.
Thankyou, very informative. Fun and friendly presentation :)
Great video. As a Canadian I feel your pain with overly scented/smelly people and places in the western world. Schools and many work places have a no perfume rule, but some people don't follow the rules. In fact, many people break rules in the west bc they don't really care how others are affected. Japan culture sounds lovely
as an italian most of these things are perfectly understandable (especially the smells, god i hate those super strong perfumes), except for the eye contact one, here people teach kids it's very important when talking to others to look them in the eyes since it's seen as a way to show respect and if people look away or keep their gaze low it probably means they're feeling uncomfortable and would rather not talk to you.
@@Sandfire564 the majority of communication is nonverbal, built upon centuries of development, much like verbal communication. A radical switch in nonverbal communication is the same as expecting a country to completely change its spoken language in that same span of time.
It is unfortunate to have a disability hinder your ability to act according to societal norms, but unfortunately the most one can reasonably expect are accommodations and understanding.
We haven't renovated all buildings to have entrances level with the ground, we've added handicapped ramps. Likewise, it's unlikely and unreasonable to expect people to change their nonverbal language to accommodate the few people they encounter per year that can't communicate that way, but awareness and understanding can be promoted so that we can properly accommodate you.
That said, try not to stress so much about it. Sure, people will recognize it as unusual behavior, but as long as you aren't outright ignoring someone they'll dismiss it as a personality quirk at the most. Demanding Karens are a once in a lifetime encounter, so you'll likely never meet someone who has a Reddit-level freak out on you. Just be you đ
@@Sandfire564 I had issues from anxiety but thankfully practiced and got pretty good at it. If you are upfront about your situation most people are more than understanding!
@@Sandfire564 fair enough đ
@@Sandfire564 i don't know you, but you seem a very sweet and genuine person, so here's a *virtual hug* for you and i wish you a pleasant day âșïž
@@giin97 I'm sorry not to engage with the substance of your post (I did read it all!), but I'd like to correct one thing: autism is not a disability. In fact this incredible program you're using was made by many people with autism and it is in my opinion one of our very best creations...and so complex that to me it may as well be magic.
A rather large, bearded (American) gentleman went to Japan as part of an employee exchange program for a car company. His beard was initially considered a big issue at the car plant (there were complaints), until it was explained to management that he portrayed "Santa Claus" at Christmas for children, and as such, it was a necessary part of the look for the character. He was granted an exemption for this public service, but a public announcement actually had to be made so that all employees would understand and have no further issues.
lol what dicks. He should just have said "for religious" reasons lol and started filing complains about the lack of body hair on ppl lol
đ
This is so crazy and absurd đłđ«Łđ
Such a refreshing video. Living in Australia its nice to have this choice to have these manners with out the stress of doing something overly wrong
Such a cute vid and also great advice. Thank you!
I definitely find people in Osaka to be more approachable and more likely to initiate a conversation (older people in rural areas seem to be like this as well). My favourite encounter was an older gentleman outside Osaka Castle who told me he rides his bike there every day to meet and talk to people. His children all live overseas and his dream is to visit them someday, so he liked to practice English with foreigners (and he was obliging in helping me practice my Japanese).
i agree! me and my wife went to Osaka too. the old lady tending a tiny food shop was so sociable! she was the one initiating a convo. i really felt at home.
People from Osaka are way more friendly compared to Tokyo and others city. Itâs well-known
@@rymc3437 shoot how's the dating
@@itsDjjayy I wanna know too
Osaka is the more "western" american-ish city of Japan. Younger crowd too etc
I find the scent discussion interesting. When I moved back to Japan about seven years ago, I was overwhelmed by all the artificial smells. The first time I lived in Japan, the overwhelming smell every where was usually things like incense, cedar chips, and tatami. But my second time living in Japan, everything smells like artificial grape, melon, apple, strawberries (department stores, women's shampoo, lotion, soap, laundry detergent, etc.) The smell formulas are different than those in the US, but I find them to be just as obnoxiously strong. I imagine that Japanese people might find an artifical yuzu smell to be more relaxing than an artifical apple pie smell, so I understand why smells from the US might be annoying. There are also really strong deoderant smells in Japan, too. Like those body and face wipes lots of people use in the summer, I find those smells hard to handle.
Not saying that Westerners (or people from other parts of the world) don't overuse scents, but I think Japan is doing a pretty good job of catching up to everyone else.
Do you think they're used to their smells and anything foreign is strong to them? When i moved to the US, I moved to a dry area and my sense of smell went down, I smelled less things than in a humid area
@@stviz87 That is a good question, probably any Japanese viewers (or even Mrs Eats herself!) could answer with more authority than I.
I grew up around cigarettes, and smoked until I was about 30, within a year or two after that, I became hyper aware of my sense of smell. I can't stand artifical scents like laundry detergent, deodorant, or cheap cologne at all in any country anymore.
I think most people are more comfortable around the scents they grew up with, so probably that is the same in Japan.
The only other comment I can think to make is around deodorant. If you have ever ridden a crowded train during summer in Japan, you would unfortunately discover that Caucasians are definitely NOT the only people who try to mask body odor with deodorant.
@@GuitarGod666 personally it relies more on if i like the scent or not.. also how much of it is there.. if it's just a small amount i don't mind it as much but if they have sprayed their entire body with whatever it is they are wearing it tends to be too much for me.. now i do need scented deodorant myself because unscented doesn't help at all.. (i sweat too much so i will just sweat straight trough.. so something with a scent actually helps longer..)
i've been to a couple japanese book stores outside of japan and they have a distinct smell which i think is nice, but i wondered why would japanese books have their own smell? i wouldn't mind having a room scent like that if they made one :D
I used a body sheet recently and I couldnât stop sneezing the smell was so strong.
these are great tips! I think Japan is a very tricky country to navigate. Foreigners, generally are not made to feel uncomfortable often and tend to let foreign habits pass in their own country. I think the only thing that I found weird in China, was the obsession with a person's ageđ
I really enjoyed this video. Japan is on my travel wish list and I love learning about local culture
Dang .. I'm starting to understand why there is such an epidemic of loneliness, depression and suicide in Japan. Some of these societal norms sound like they would be EXTREMELY brutal if you had a lack of social skills or if you were dealing with something like Asperger syndrome and had trouble making friends and interacting with others
Actually, as someone diagnosed with aspergers (though I prefer to identify as autistic due to aspergers being a term invented by nazis to weed out which people were socially acceptable enough to not be killed) and has difficulties with socialization, japanese culture is increeeedibly appealing to me BECAUSE of all the rules- theres a system to it that's just easier to understand than living in america and having to guess all the time and the pressure having to pretend to act naturally, yet in a "socially acceptable" way. Japanese culture expects a mask too but it's being polite and respectful, which I already am to a higher degree than everyone around me because of my life experiences being chastised and bullied for being outside of the norm. Japanese social culture is practically set up in a way that I fully understand and already embody more than the cultures I was born into. And being from a latinx family, japanese norms about not touching and not speaking to strangers sounds like a breath of fresh air- because those things already make me uncomfortable in the first place. Things like the "overwhelming scent" rules are really just icing on the cake
@@kriscrossender4525 I shut my mouth and crawl into a hole of ignorance! Your points are super solid and I hadn't even thought of anything that you said. I was thinking of a friend who has aspergers and struggled a great deal connecting with others because of social awkwardness here in the states and knowing him and his personality, I assumed that he would be having a bear of a time trying to understand the "rules" as you put it. However, I had not even considered how helpful having official, societal rules would probably be for him. I apologize for the ignorance of my previous comment!
@@drinnerd8532 I appreciate the apology, but there definently is merit to your point too! A big deterrent for me away from living in japan is how they treat mental health issues and disability, so in a way you are right that living in Japan would also be difficult as an autistic person- and even in the points you made you're right that Japan would be quite lonely and that could exacerbate feelings of depression, it's just that for me my identity as an autistic person makes me already feel that way, even in a friendly culture like America and my Latinx family- so it isn't as much of a deterrent. I'm definitely glad I could open your eyes to the ways Japan does sound appealing in some ways to those of us on the autistic spectrum!
You are absolutely right, I can not believe a person living I a society not been able to interact with others just because is not their tradition⊠itâs just one person seen others in the street or wherever that is just focusing in his or her Only WorldâŠthat is so sad.
As another autistic person, it sounds like paradise. You go to work, follow strict rules, keep to your self, go home.
i had a japanese friend who told me about the scent thing in japan before i went there for a time, and as someone who really hates strong smells, i was very delighted about this. however, it is a little bit different in reality, a lot of times when taking the train esp during rush hour, workers in suits would have this distinct smell: ALCOHOL STENCH.
And tobacco, and oftentimes sweat. Crowded Tokyo metro was often an amalgamation of disgusting scents.
I hate strong perfume, literally get headaches from it, there's a certain perfume scented like a flower whose name I don't remember that instantly gives me headaches and makes me wanana throw up. I'm not even exaggerating.
@@shaggyrogers9028 Same, it drives me crazy when someone near me is wearing certain kinds of scents. It makes me feel like their is heavy smoke in the air clogging my nostrils.
@@shaggyrogers9028 Especially If it's in a car like bruh wtf
Japanese preferred scent is BO from the LOCAL line đ
Great video. I learned some new things. Iâve been to Japan several times and love it. I wish we had the concept of smell harassment in the US and Europe!
Informative, entertaining and pleasantly funny!
There is such a contrast between Japanese people preferring unscented stuff for the body, but smoking being so ubiquitous. OK, so I left Japan 30 years ago, but I recall the most unpleasant scent of people was that of cigarette smoke. It lingers on the body and in the clothes even if you carefully smoke outdoors. I loved the scent-free world there, save for the stink of cigarettes.
Cigarette smoke in restaurants and public places was very common even in the early 2010s until suddenly it disappeared. I think there was some legislation over the issue that cleared it up, but I didn't really notice until recently when I smelled the cigarette smoke of a person walking in front of me and realized it had been a number of years.
Itâs still very much a thing, though itâs been decreasing as fewer and fewer places allow smoking. The smell is less noticeable because smokers have to go further out of their way to smoke in most places, literally, so some of it wears off - in contrast to when it used to be common for someone to smoke in a crowd on the way to the station and then immediately get on the crowded train smelling of smoke, for example. All of that still happens, but is more spread o it and isolatedâŠexcept for the âmanner spotâ (for smoking) right in the small pedestrian island when crossing the street in front of Toho Cinema Namba. (ïŒâžá)
I was in an izakaya yesterday. One old Japanese guy was smoking at the bar, then the owner started too.
Yep, five years ago in Tokyo I had to hold my breath for a little while on my way to the train stop to get to class. I had to pass a smoking area but to be fair the (majority business men) did stick to that area
30 years ago it was BAD. People smoked EVERYWHERE and places had tiny non-smoking sections that smokers still used. International flights were horrible because the back of the plane was a wall of smoke.
NOW... The only cigarette smoke I smell comes from people in cars who drive by. A few decades back the country suddenly changed policy and people quickly followed. No more smoking anywhere because no one said anything. Malls have encased smoking rooms. Even in the downtown where I live there are only a few smoking areas but they are outside. No one just lights up anywhere. I just heard last week that even pachinko parlors are smoke free.
Japan has many things to learn from the world, but one thing I really like about some Japanese educational systems is the fact they make the children clean after themselves at school (like mop, sweep, clean the dishes and organize all the desks and utensils), to serve eachother food and be grateful for those who produced the food.
i don't like the cleaning after school. when school's over i would rush out the door as fast as i could
My elementary school made us do some cleaning. Like going outside & clapping the erasers to remove chalkdust (which is actually very unhealthy)
Sounds very Montessori
Its one of those multi asian tenets outsiders are not aware of. "You must serve others before serving yourself"... the whole helping the community attitude first. Being a team member or goal achievement 1st before your own. Which apparently i was shocked in awe when i saw my Mexican brothers and sisters who were all stopping what they were doing when the earthquake struck Mexico city. No they did not seek shelter or run away! Soon as the ground stopped shaking, every man woman and child started digging into the piles to save their countrymen. Some countries have a stronger belief in the power of their unity. Japan is definitely oriented into this manner. Filpinos are as well. Especially when it comes to family, maybe moreso because of the shared calamity we face being part of the pacific ring of fire. I believe samoan/ maori/ new Zealanders also the same
I wouldnât do the cleaning thing for after school but maybe put time aside during it.
Serving each other food is cute and my friend groups would do that (US).
And I promise almost everybody loved the people serving food and were friendly af.
Fascinating, thank you for sharing.
I'm an Australian and you made me laugh all the way till the end.
No eye contact? đ Please tell that to all the people who stare at foreigners on the train and bus.
To be fair thatâs different from _direct_ eye contact.
I was thinking the same thing! During my first trip to Japan, there was a gentleman on a train staring at me for the entire ride. I would look over and find him staring, look away and mind my business, only to look back and find him still staring. I was wondering what I had done to offend him. lol
@@dearthofdoohickeys4703 thing is, they do stare directly into your eyes, sometimes even with a mean look when you catch them staring đ
@@joshuageckles802 you gotta have a staring contest at that point bro
Stare back at them until they look away lol
That's interesting about "not talking to strangers". I knew about that, but when I went to Japan a bunch of people did talk to me- usually cashiers in stores ("Where are you from?" they would ask, then say "ah, Beautiful country!" or something in response). One time in a train station in Osaka some guy stopped on his bike to ask me where I was from, then started talking about his own trip to my country. I was not expecting that, lol. I wonder if they knew about the differences in expectations and just liked talking to people and used my being foreign as an excuse!
This also happened to me in a Tokyo supermarket and my japanese friend was like WHAT. đ€Żđ€Żđ€Żđ€Żđ€Ż
they're creepy
Or maybe you donât look Japanese so they were more curious
I adore the Japanese politeness! It is sincere, not like the hypocrite American politeness.
@@DJPaulgee1 that is being prejudiced. Racism is something else.
Thank you, Mrs. Eats! Love your videos!
Visited Japan a while back. I had people accompany me to show me where to go when I was looking for a place and could not find it. Had a gentleman see me looking at books in a bookshop and when he saw I was interested in a certain kind of subject (haiku poetry,) he came back to me a while later, and gifted me a book and told me "This is the best Haiku poet in Japan." Love Japan, Japanese culture and Japanese people! Such good taste, politeness and kindness. Even by the end of the day, drunk business men who accidentally would bump into me on the streets, would apologize non-stop -- never aggressive. Beautiful country, beautiful people, such an amazing sense of aesthetics... and the food is the best in the world (unless you have something against raw fish, that is. đ ) Great cinema, art, traditional fashion, pottery, architecture, wood working... a little corner of heaven on earth indeed! Oh, and I literally hate strong scents, especially perfumes and colones, they give me headaches, so that was another nice thing in Japan... no offensive odors!
It has its pluses. I lived in Tokyo for about a year. As a 6'3" white gaijin, people stayed well clear of me. I commuted to work using the bus every day. In that entire year, not ONCE...not ONCE...did anyone sit next to me. The bus could be packed, with every other seat taken and lots of people standing, but still, nobody would sit next to me. A rough estimate would be somewhere like 400 journeys.
Once, my friends and I were looking for somewhere to sit in Starbucks. The place was really busy and there were only a few seats left. I saw 1 seat in between two salarymen at one of those long seating bars. I sat down and waited. It took probably no more than a minute before both of them got up and left. Then my friends came and took the newly empty seats.
I just want to clarify that in no way did I ever threaten anyone or do anything to stand out in any way other than simply be a tall white guy. My existence simply made people uncomfortable. But, rather than be offended by it, I just tried to use it to my advantage.
I think it was the beard.
When I was in Japan visiting (I'm a white American woman & was traveling with my 17-year-old son who was at that time at least 6 ft 2 in). I remember being on a subway and an older Japanese woman looking over at my son, who was near her, and she was gazing up and up till she got to the top of his head and then she looked over at me and smiled. A very cute exchange. No words were spoken but clearly she was saying, "Goodness! He's really tall!"
I totally understand where you're coming from. They don't want to call it "DISCRIMINATION" because they have these excuses to justify their actions. I live in Osaka, and despite her saying in this video that the people here are friendly, ironically, I've experienced more rudeness here than in any other part of Japan that I've been to.
Your height scared them because they are petite people. Maybe towering over a man especially may make them feel inferior, and they are a proud race. Just making a observation, because cannot figure what else it could be. I feel bad how uncomfortable you must have felt.
As a person who has lived in Japan for over 20 years, I can truthfully say thereâs little that is more impolite than expecting other people to understand your culture without explaining it to them.
well said.
It is also very impolite to go and live in a country without studying up on their culture first...
@@fumomofumosarum5893 it's even more impolite saying youshouild study up a culture that is not explain to foreign, as you should study something that do not exist
IMHO it's up to the vistor to find out about the culture, expecially if you are going to live there for any period of time. In my experince when you make the effort to find out its recieved better by locals, than expecting them to adjust to foreign ways.
@@fumomofumosarum5893 its also impolite to be racist and not admit it right?
Japanese are so polite that they can be kind even when discriminating you or being racist đ
Western notions that now lack any intellectual coherence
This was informative and amusing.â€ïžđŻđ”đŹđ§
That last one is especially amusing, as in the US we're raised to maintain eye contact and not to needlessly interrupt with vocalizations, lol. Interesting how cultures can clash in the most unexpected ways :P
I still remember how when I used to work as part time in a fancy restaurant, my boss would get mad at me because I wouldn't speak loud enough for costumers to understand what I was saying and I wasn't making eye contact to them. According to my boss, that was just rude to them and would make them feel like I didn't care about them or something like that.
Surprising how somewhere out there in the world, the opposite attitude is the polite one and the one you're used to makes you look like a creepy weirdo.
I've always hated that. I can't stand making constant eye contact with people, I don't understand why it's considered a necessary part of communication
Litterally. In schools they always tell us to make eye contact to show we are listenin
@@crooked9210 cultural thing. Refusing eye contact is the equivalent to scrolling Twitter on your phone while someone is talking to you, from before Twitter (or smartphones) were a thing. Basically, making eye contact states, "I hear you, I'm attentive, and I respect your time and opinion," with the opposite being implied by refusing eye contact.
i think every country that i know of has the culture of looking people in the eye when talking to them.
The small talk with strangers thing is honestly just 'We're both in this place right now, and I'm making the choice to greet and acknowledge you, rather than be awkward and just... pretend you don't exist'. That's what it is for me anyways.
Yeah, same here. It's weird to share a small space with someone and ignore them.
Cut to me, a young Midwesterner visiting NYC and smiling and saying "hello" to everyone I passed in Times Square đ”âđ«
I am coming to Kyoto at the beginning of March, I know this is one of the most traditional areas, which is also why i chose it, but your video has at least made me aware that if I had to ask directions or something, that people just might not answer and now i understand why, thank you. I do plan a couple of visits to Osaka so it'll be interesting to see if there's any difference with the local people as I will be travelling alone.
Thanks a lot for all these informations. I love japonese culture and wants to learn more. Respect the culture of the country seems essential and you help me on it. Thanks again
I'm Arab, we LOVE perfumes, that would be really strange for me. Men grow beards in general. We also make friends easily, and talk to anyone because we believe if you don't talk you are strangeđ
Arabic people are usually very sociable and love to talk, but even by western standards the perfume is a bit too strong. Less is more guys! đ
@@WayneLyons I'll tryđđđđ»
I got into the habit of wearing strong perfumes because of my Arab friends.
There is a word in English for someone who does not have a beard. Woman.
@@jaykay5838 so rude đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł
But here's the thing, People from mega cities usually aren't very open to strangers regardless of what country they're from. It's usually an overcrowding thing not default culture. Unless it's their job most people from big population centers arent very open to strangers...
People are generally more personally connected back then. I think it is the new generations that are more stressed, too busy and awkward with small talk
I live in NY and thought the same thing as you, Bishop.But I kind of miss those small chat back in the time when I was in North Dakota. Friendly and open. When I first moved NY, to be nice, I said hi to total strander on the street and they looked at me like I was crazy. đ
Come to India đ
Yeah as a Brit I notice that in my own large town as well as when I visit London, but when I go to rural Norfolk to sail on the Broads strangers talk to each other and almost everyone waves when passing in boats on the river.
Population density goes up, personal contact with strangers goes down it seems.
Agreed..
Me in the city:mind ur own business...
Me in my hometown/village: everyone including foreigners r my family..đâïž..
The smile/small talk thing throws me for a loop. How can you not smile and be friendly with others? Are we not breathing the same air? Sharing the same experience in that moment? Like having a total random stranger that won't even acknowledge my presence is 100000x times creepier then someone that said hello and gave me even a half hearted smile.
This was interesting, cute and funny. Thank you for sharing, i love learning about the world.đ
I also hate the "perfume harassment" in the states. Everything here is scented: deodorant, lotion, hand soap, shampoo, conditioner, laundry detergent, dryer sheets, shower soap, cat litter, GARBAGE BAGS...
Same - I find freshly cleaned clothes to smell worse than when they were dirty from all the laundry perfumes, and changing garbage bags isn't fun. If it's a light smell I'm OK.
I need unscented deodorant, I really hate the smell of most dishwash soaps, and I really hate most laundry detergent smells, I wish more stuff was unscented, or at least more natural scents vs chemical ones, strong chemically made smells are the worst
That garbage bag one is so true lol I actually used to love scented garbage bags until I bought some garbage bags that had a Fabuloso scent. Omg the smell was so strong my head started hurting horribly. Never again lol
Sooooo true. Some scented garbage bags STINK and make garbage smell worse. And also the cat litter one is annoying to my cats as well. I quickly stopped buy that for them and got unscented crystals. Also why do menstrual pads have those annoyingly strong scents?? I hate them and i know many people who avoid them due to it causing irritation and allergic reactions.
Don't forget the guy who bathes in Aqua di Gio!
I would personally love it if random strangers wouldn't always be trying to strike up a conversation with me. However, I feel it is actually a beneficial thing for the elderly because they may not get out much, so if two or three people stop and chat with them while they are out doing their grocery shopping that might help them feel connected to their community.
That's a nice thought. I used to wonder why my widowed mother went to the grocery store so often but for seniors like her it's an outing to be enjoyed.
In Germany (I think mainly on the countryside?) many elderly people try to strike up conversations with people they come across on the streets because of this reason.
Where are you from? I wanna go there. I'm looking for a country to move to and I want some place where strangers would talk to me and touch me and I could do the same thing to them.
I'm super extrovert and it kills me that it isn't the norm where I'm from. Out here, people will turn agressive if you try to talk to a stranger beyond something like asking for directions...
It's hilariously the opposite in East Canada. I'm originally from Ethiopia so when I moved here, I was astonished by how frequently strangers talk to you about the weather. Just small remarks you can make in passing and respond to in passing, not full out conversations. Then you just walk or bike on your way without any more interaction.
Thank you for this hilarious and informative video! đ
We also have "rules" that we probably aren't aware of. That's one of the fun things about living abroad, you get more conscious of those kinds of things.
In America, you actually can be told to shave by your company, depending on where you work. I worked for a privately held company, and they held their dress code to a high standard. They dictated hair colors must be natural, no visible tattoos, no piercings besides in the ears, no facial hair, etc., etc. Only in recent years has the company been called on its dress code. The company ran as though it were still 100 years ago. Enough push-back from the employees changed some of the restrictions. Looking clean and polished is one thing, but writing someone up for a five o'clock shadow and threatening firing them (which happened frequently) is another thing entirely.
For anyone in the US being forced to shave while suffering from Pseudofolliculitis Barbae: It is illegal for your employer to require you to shave unless it is legitimate requirement to perform the job, i.e. firefighters who need to be able to make sure their masks can seal properly.
Dirty-shaven is a boring look.
I had a job once where I had to wear pants, dress shirt and tie. They let me have green hair, eyebrow ring, stretched earring, and a tongue ring. Most of my head was shaved. I worked in a cubical making phone calls. This was in 1997. I never understood why I had to wear the tie.
@@Outwardpd I don't think that is true at all. Different states require different things, what might seem logical in one isn't in another. I bring this up because the more I dig into Florida, the more I realize what makes sense rarely makes it to Florida. Since Florida is a no cause state, they can fire you for pretty much any reason. And if they have you sign a contract, or at least agree before starting your job to certain rules like business casual and clean shaven, then they will make you shave or you will be fired.
Edit: although yes, if you are suffering from medical issues, there may be a legal case there. But it is important to remember how vast the US is and how each state operates. Never a good idea to make a blanket statement about the whole of the US, just as making a blanket statement about the whole of the EU wouldn't make sense.
or groom yourself too. like you said, it depends
Just watching the bit about smalltalk etc. reminded me of the several weeks I've spent in Sweden. As a Canadian you'll often reflexively say hello to people you run across in less populated areas. My Girlfriend at the time scolded me for doing this on a hiking trail, saying to "Stop scaring the Swedes!" and the vibe feels very similar to what you're describing.
It makes them sound almost like timid specimens of wildlife that are poorly acclimated to the presence humans.
@@bennyboiart7781 yea thats why some japanese people are depressed especially if they work all week. humans are social creatures, you're supposed to connect in public matters not the private one. we dont know why they evolved that way maybe because their history.
This reminds me of "The Onion" video: Northerner terrifies Londoners by saying "Hello"
@@JannPoo yea but london is better than socializing at the end of the day with their close friends in pub, well not until the stabby street came on.
I hate that. Some people look you dead in the eye squeezing past you on small trail when you rarely see people and dont say anything. Its so weird. And its even weirder when you said hello and they dont answer. Like wtf is peoples problem
Much appreciated for this amazing content. Please make a content on how similar or different is Anime characters from real Japanese.
Very informative...thank you.
I'm living in Japan now, and I follow these rules and many others. However, I feel so suffocated by all the rules and indirectness, and I've started feeling down. So I'm excited to return back home soon. I'm a little sad, because I love all the Japanese people I've met; my coworkers are amazing and my friends are wonderful. But it's just too much for me, unfortunately. I still love Japan though!
May I ask which rules affect you or bother you the most? Iâm a pretty impulsive person, so I know I wouldnât be able to abide by so many rules even if I tried. If I canât act natural I get anxiety
@@xLinksDreheRx I know someone that was working in Japan, the coworkers got him fired behind his back, they was nice to him in person, he took a day off which they said itâs cool, then came back to be told he canât work there no more, itâs weird.
@@claytonbigsby9673 exactly what i was talking about. honne and tatemae. sometimes u think u friends with someone but after 10 years u realize u are not. japanese are like that its astonishing. my brand managerin was also just fired 2 weeks ago out of the blue. its germany here but they still behave like that in foreign countries its insane. she had 2 weeks before her trial period of 6 months was ending and had no evaluation telling here she needs to step up her game or anything. japanese are very polite which is nice but hell they are fake "nice" and pretty devious behind their mask
@@xLinksDreheRx yea thatâs crazy, they are non confrontational peopleâŠhard to trust if itâs like that over there.
@@xLinksDreheRx can you please not use the R slur its very offensive and a source of pain for many people.
we donât wear deodorant in the us to âcover stank upâ lol, we use it to *Prevent* smelling bad. If you already stink, deodorant isnât going to help. You shower, then apply after you dry off. đ
I wish you could explain that to some of the people at my job. Men and Women in their 40s that will proudly proclaim they only bathe once every 5 days because they don't want to remove the bodies natural oils and instead will apply perfume or cologne.
đ€ąđ€ąđ€ąđ€ąđ€ź
@@xcaluhbration They're not entirely wrong. They should shower more though lol. Bathing is only going to make the issue worse. But it's also unhealthy to overly shower and/or wash your face because the oils do help your hair and skin. You will dry out your skin if you are over-cleaning it.
@@danielbroome5690 That's true in the west we tend to over clean ourselves. However you can still shower daily but you can use less soap and don't scrub your skin every day.
@@ajp2223 yeah I don't care if someone showers once a month, as long as I ain't gotta experience that FUNK đ€Ł
@@xcaluhbration what kind of job u work
As a Swedish/Finnish guy, I LOVE that you guys are why and quiet, because so am I. I hope I one day go to Japan, it has been my dream to do so ever since I can remember.
Just flew back from Japan today after spending 1 month there. I truly miss it and canât wait to go back. The people and culture is so unique and beautiful
I'm not Japanese, but I definitely feel the avid aversion for small talk, especially with strangers. I loved living in Osaka, it was so quiet and calm, and everyone I interacted with was really nice and helpful. It was also so nice not to have to chat with store clerks...
I am Polish, and no one really talks to strangers here either. I was very confused by how talktive americans are to strangers. We can be very talktive as Well, but only to people you know very well
@@mysticwolfdog9553 in mexico its completely the opposite, itâs considered rude to not talk to someoneđ
I am from Romania and in my country small talk with strangers in not a thing. I guess is why alot of us Romanians are a little awkward with small talk.
Thatâs interesting, I enjoy talking to people I donât know, both as a customer, And as an employee in my job, in fact it is a large part of my job as I work for Chick Fil A, and people skills are required. I would feel ostracized if people refused to chat with me lol
@@mysticwolfdog9553 I am from Germany and here it is almost exactly the same.
I get that there are some people who follow these "rules" in Japan. Even myself being a foreigner, I have definitely noticed some of these things, but Japan is also changing as well with the younger generation and a lot of these "rules" have changed a bit as well. It's a good sign, considering Japanese society has been too strict on itself and it's nice to see people relaxing a bit more now.
im all for respecting society in japan, but when they cant give me the same level of respect back, just because i have my 3 late daughters names tattood on my chest, then i have a problem (drunk driver went head first into them on a country road, driver of the other car also died) japans stance on tattoos is disgusting
@@bigfrankfraser1391 Then... don't go?
@@javohnbdyer5456 kind of hard when my wifes family is from tokyo
Your choice to ink your body just don't go to Japan if u can't handle their stance on tattoos
Yeah, any change to cater to the banjin's taste is a good thing
Hi mrs eats, i know its a long shot, but where did you get your blouse in this video? I love your content, keep up the good work
I was born an American, yet I share some personality traits like Japanese.
One is how strangers want to talk to me. I am never comfortable in situations like that. Most times I would keep to myself unless answering short simple questions that arenât personal, or getting assistance from employees at stores. But when random strangers just walk up to me & start talking it usually gives me bad vibes, even if they are being nice. Most times I would usually come across creeps, extremely rude people, or even people who talk random stuff for no apparent reason. Most times itâs usually extremely rude people who sometimes pester me for no reason at all. Then there are the ones who either start talking 5h17 like they wanna pick a fight, or the ones who are biased 455h0l3s.
The other is eye contact. Eye contact is also a form of communication, & the one who is looking at you doesnât have to show any expression at all, but you know they are looking at you for a reason, especially if you noticed after a quick single glance that their eyes have been on you for longer than a few seconds. There is nothing wrong with glancing at another person as a glance is less than a second, but is necessary for safety reasons. I obviously donât like attention so even if I notice someone staring at me I would keep about my business without starting back. Another reason I donât like staring at people is due to the saying of how the eyes are a window to oneâs soul. Some people are very sensitive & can sense something through the eyes of another. I have sensed things in some people just from looking into their eyes for only a couple of seconds. Regardless of what I witnessed, I never like looking at people eye to eye for very long.
Itâs true how some people believe it is a sign of respect, confidence, trust, blah-blah-blah⊠But to some of us, just staring at someoneâs face while theyâre making all kinds of expressions when youâre talking is very distracting. So if I were to live in Japan I would feel pretty at home with their culture.
As a retail worker in the US I will say that employees are encouraged to talk to shoppers because the higher up's insist it cuts down on theft. This isn't to say retail workers can't be polite and genuine in their chatting but it is something to keep in mind.
Ahh so that's why they always ask if I need help with anything everytime. It gets annoying.
@@Omen465 Trust it's just as annoying if not more so for the employee.
For me, I find that a lot of places encourage it because it creates a âfriendlyâ environment and makes the customer feel welcome
@@Angel-qq1mv I don't think anyone has ever felt welcome by such things like honestly. Most of it is too much.
@@Zippyser thatâs why I put it in quotations lol
Actually the facial hair one was very similar here in the United States around the same time as in Japan. After world war 2 and into the 1950s more people were clean shaven and it was more socially acceptable to be clean shaven and beards were viewed the same as they are in Japan. But in the 1970s and 1980s beards became more socially acceptable again.
Yeah beards fall in and out of fashion, and even then some US businesses donât allow beards. Last place I worked at didnât allow beards.
Beards & moustaches were never entirely in fashion in the United states during the 70s (dirty hippies), and only guys like Burt Reynolds carried a 'stache.
Beards slowly came in with Goatee & Van Dyke stylings durung the 90s, but the beards of the modern era are actually a byproduct of the Global War on Terror. Both sides of the war became competitive beard cultivators because ain't no time to shave when you're operating it the sandbox.
Beards became somewhat popular in the late 1960s onwards, due to the counterculture, but they only recently became mainstream, I'd say around the mid 2010s. I remember in the late 2000s to around 2013, most people were clean shaven too.
If you don't have a beard how can you call yourself a man
@@bobbyantrobus1805 they are not men, simple.
Great video!! Thanks for the info!!! đ
Thanks for this! It will help me on my school trip to Japan 04/02/24! â€ïž
Probably happened because I'm a foreigner, but Japan was by far the place where the biggest number of strangers talked to my friends and I. People would ask for pictures, talk, buy us drinks - some guy even bought us some fruits. It was.....different đ
were you in tokyo or in some rural area?
in my first year in japan (30 years now) i made all sorts of friends, from guys who work in amusement parks, to literal old school yakuza guys with the full body ink (one of which was at my wedding, mostly because it was his daughter i was marrying) to this day im still great friends with all 13 of my japanese ex girlfriends, one of which after we broke up introduced me to my now wife
@@gaudah7091 when i went to tokyo people kept asking me for picturesđ°they would literally make me hold their child to take pictures.
@@bigfrankfraser1391I want to read your biography
@@mandymentzer6357 what can i say, being over 7 foot tall in japan tends to attract the weird shit to me
To an American, it can be very off-putting to have someone not meet your eyes, and also make many sounds of acknowledgment. Many times in American culture, when someone is doing this they are indicating that they are annoyed because they already know what you're going to say, or don't care about what you're saying. The acknowledgements can be seen as sarcastic when said too fast, or in quantity, especially when not meeting someone's eyes.
Cultures are weird. đ
You need to see peopleâs eyes so you can determine yourself if tthey telling the truth or not
Among some people in the U.S., not making sustained eye contact is cultural, simply not congruent with the dominant culture. Also, people on the autism spectrum find it difficult (and emotionally painful) to make sustained eye contact. They are not necessarily dishonest. They might be honoring their tribal cultural norms, or autistic, or very shy.
Maybe a remnant of feudal Japan.
Thanks for these informations senjumaru