What Dating an Emotionally Unavailable Guy Looks Like
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- čas přidán 21. 12. 2022
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When your hunger for love is stronger than your self love, you settle for situationships and crumbs.
This!! Well said
Love is not to be rush. If it is than its only lust. Lust is temporary not long terms.
Love this! Stealing it 😊
Ugh. This is so true. Time to start doing things differently.
💯
Instead of being afraid to lose him, be afraid of losing yourself. When we compromise on our boundaries and ignore or minimize our feelings and needs, that's exactly what happens. And it takes a VERY LONG TIME to recover from that. Much longer than it takes to recover from an asshole guy.
@Don K Yikes! Your boss should have known better than to make a move and stay at the same company and in the same role. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
@Don K Wow, that sucks. Sounds like you need to put up some strong boundaries. Harder said than done, I know.
@Don K As a stranger on the internet who knows not of the intricacies of your situation, I think it would be irresponsible of me to give specific advice. But if a therapist is covered by your work benefits at all, I would strongly urge you to talk to someone because the situation you're in is a really difficult one.
@donk8105 @donk8105 omg, go to HR and report him! He is not worthy of you at all, he's causing you so much emotional distress and confusion, and apparently spreading sexual rumors??! Hell no, let that 🥭 (man go lol) and go find that love you are craving within yourself so you will never allow someone to treat the love of your life (you) so terribly again😞
@Don K This is a problem for HR, Don K. -- unless you like the drama. Tread very carefully, or you could lose your job. Too many snakes in that pit where you work.
This was excellent. I was dating a man that was perfect on the outside. Handsome, charming, high status, funny. Captivating. And a whole mess underneath. I was carrying all the weight in the relationship. Emotionally and physically..,yes pleasing him and not once did he ever pursue me intimately. I was heavily deprived from the relationship and hanging on for dear life because of the outer shell. I finally cut him loose. The man didn’t lose an ounce of sleep. Haven’t heard from him since. Ladies… don’t drag it out. Run!!!!
Solid advice.
SO CRAZY how good they can look on paper...all their friends and coworkers and everyone they meet loves them because they're so charming and outwardly stable...and no one knows what a terrible partner they are; that side of them is reserved for only you...I will never forget that feeling
Dont be afraid to lose him. Be afraid to keep him. Ugh RUN!!
Those 10k € houses are everywhere.
I just freed myself from this. Man wouldnt even touch me or even be near me when we slept in same bed. Wouldnt kiss me hug me nothing . I feel amazing and its only been two days since hes been gone .
A general rule that may not fit every situation:
A sad sob story + lack of accountability = manipulation
Very well stated!
Love this!!! It fits all of my situations. It’s usually the first sign of manipulation.
The question about “what if I don’t find someone like him again?” - well that’s exactly the goal to find someone not like him. Flip the narrative. He’s not good enough for you, he’s not giving you what you want. YOU want something different than him. And you won’t find something better if you settle for this situation.
Lmao this reminds me of my abusive ex. He said “you’ll never find someone like me”, in my head I was thinking “well yeah, hopefully I won’t.” I wish I had said it out loud to him instead!
It happened a lot to me in my lifetime (I'm 39). I just met guys who were very immature or not really into me, yep, it sucks. I struggled to feel confident in myself, feeling like I had something wrong, wasnt good enough, pretty enough... I broke with them and stopped dating them thinking the same. What if I dont find someone like him again. Guess what. I didnt find someone at all :) but I'm happy that at least I'm not with a douchebag, it would be worst.
I'm happy that I didnt settle with this type of person. I feel my life would be very ruined at this time. Right now, actually, yes love didnt come either.... dont know what I've done wrong! but the 30s are a bad time for dating I suppose, lots of men in a relationship already, lots of "my wife" around"..... it's ok. Life can be sweet alone. A lot of eroes are lonely, and I feel one of them. And I'm also very pretty and attractive and in shape and intelligent, and a man is really stupid not seeing that. Maybe it is just that. Men are stupid. I'm sure my man did the big mistake of taking someone else that's making his life miserable.... life is choices. Wrong choices. Good choices. Life is yours and yours only, and the presence of someone else doesnt make it wonderful, but just you. And forget children and stuff, it is ok to go your direction that is the loner... it can be amazing actually
Needed to hear this. Thank you😊
She's blinded by the fact that he's famous. He's not actually giving her what she wants.
Amen to that!!! Thank you for putting this way 🤔 ❤🙏🔥👑🔥🙏❤🤔
I read this and it makes a lot of sense, “ if they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused”. She have to let him GO NOW!!! He doesn’t see her as the one. If she stays, she will be nothing but a SPOT HOLDER until he finds the right one. Be smart!!!!
The fact that she is a Love Couch but couldn"t give her Self a good Advice, clearly she need to Change her Job she might be also giving those poor People a wrong advice🤷♀️..
@@letsgotravel6724 that’s right!!!
I agree! Her advice she gives other people about forcing yourself to keep busy so to not "contract one-itis" sounds like cliché advice she read in Cosmo Magazine. If you're meant to be and feelings are mutual, you both want to spend lots of time together and not play those stupid games of hard to get. If you're with the wrong one, you'll be called "needy", if you're with the right one, they'll call "loyal and loving" and they will reciprocate. If one plays games, the other would want to play games too.
For real married for 10 years. Communication is key, even while taking the day doing separate things. Always ask her how her day is going whether gone at work or coming through the front door. I don't care for the boring stories or complaints, I care about her confiding to me. If it's serious, then I know before she says anything. I hate the stress in today's world that hurts families as well as the decisions made by single people who are looking for someone that society does create anymore.
@@coolbreeze5683 exactly!!! I agree with you 💯.
"You have your reasons, but I have my reality. If my reality is that what you're giving me isn't enough for me to be happy, then your reasons as to why that is don't really matter." (17:47) BRILLIANT!!
❤❤
The thing is, most people know what genuine interest looks like. You know the texts you'll receive, the questions you'll be asked, the plans that will be made, etc. The falling process isn't that mysterious. So you should also know when someone ISN'T falling for you. Inconsistency, dodging of important conversations, excuses as to why it can't be serious now, some scattered future-faking, some ego pumping followed by silence, not progressing the relationship, etc. You KNOW, you just don't want to believe, and this is causing you suffering.
Spot on
100%
💯 Summarized as Denial ...denying ALL ..its being caught up in the delusion of What can be ..what it could look like...Unless your willing to wait and see if he gets to choose you over the others..but there are high chances you could shed many many tears in the process of Waiting.
Let the Person come ready and sure of what he wants ...not to flex his emotions with you.
Then why do they pursue you hard at first? Just for ego kibbles? Leave people alone if you're that disturbed. They sure do want your love and attention, but they keep you at a distance.
@@letym2271THIS. Dealing with this at the moment …
Don't interrupt Audrey when she is speaking!!! It is frustrating.
I cannot believe that there are women that are still hoping and waiting for men to commit. There is no time to wait. You will find somebody else. Be happy.
Or maybe you won't... still be happy and enjoy your life,
Amen
@@lisameyer7757 TRUE
Way easier said than done. For those who know better just means that they have learned the lesson. There are a lot of people (both men and women) that are dealing with unresolved trauma and still date at the same time and it’s not helping their current situation. If that makes any sense.
These days many men are unwilling to commit
The worrying thing about this relationship is that he seems VERY experienced in playing this game and leading people on. He's done it a lot - it's a strategy that works for him. He knows exactly what to say, to play the victim, get her sympathy, keep her hanging on, frightened to ask to many questions or push him for real answers. He's an experienced manipulator. I bet his phone is full of conversations with multiple women, serving his needs in some way.
He drove that last woman bizarrely crazy. She wasn’t borderline until she met that narcissistic man. Wow
Exactly
100%
Amen to that
@@noticeyourneighbor8649to be fair, that’s not how mental illness works. Not sticking up for him but that logic is flawed and potentially dangerous.
my humble opinion: if he really is dealing with PTSD severe enough to not know if he wants to be in a committed relationship, he needs to have the self awareness to remove himself from the dating pool or not dangle the idea of a relationship in front of people. work thru ur shit and dont expect others to handle it for you. he gets the grace of the emotional security and validation of a relationship while simultaneously only just being involved enough to not be hurt like she would be.
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯!!
Let’s be real, this dude doesn’t have PTSD. PTSD is a serious disorder and the misuse of it as well as of the concept of “trauma” is exhausting.
Too easy!!!! Why leave the game? It’s not HIS responsibility to Buyer Beware! That’s on whoever buying into his BS! He don’t owe NOBODY NOTHING
We don't know if he has PTSD or not. It doesn't matter. She needs to not be needy for him and leave
She’s a relationship coach and she can’t “see” what this is. Just goes to show how hard it is when it’s ourselves “in” something. So much easier to see when not emotionally involved. Run girl.
Never listen to a woman that gives men dating advice.
On one hand, it concerns me that she’s seeing pretty obvious red flags and she doesn’t know what to do with them, but at the same time even professionals don’t always know anything and it’s humble to ask other professionals.!
She is a coach but is different when it personlly hit you.
I’m so happy you were able to say something constructive rather than demeaning.
Great brain
Very empathetic response ❤😊
If her goal is not to lose him even though she isn’t happy with him then she will lose herself instead.
That’s super profound, thank you for that 🙏
This 💯 never negotiate yourself or cross oceans for someone who wouldn’t jump through puddles for you.
When you start defending people who hurt you.... saying it's fine because they're "a big deal." It's time to reevaluate that pedestal you put them on. They may be a great person.. but if they're not a great person for YOU. That's the reality you have to live in. Relationships have to be mutually beneficial. They cannot survive otherwise. Someone gets hurt otherwise. Being hurt by someone you respect and care for isn't a relationship anyone should readily accept. Your suffering is a BIG DEAL too.
Feeling like an intruder in someone's life is no way to live. Just got out of a situation that dragged on for 9 plus months. I was always put on hold. Never again.
This is the worst feeling
@@Alloniya yes it is.
Was also in the same situation
Am still in that situation. The worst part is they don’t want to let us go either.
So true
“I know not to text him too much or too little”
Girrrrrrrrl, he sounds like way too much work. Next!
Facts
Way to much work
Same thing happened to me. Never wait. Timing is not right. You can't force a person to heal. Move on.
Well, you're right but sometimes I think you really can help a person to heal better, even getting them to Heal more Faster and Better than Healing alone by themselves🤏...
Just saying Basically some Men may end up Healing and growing in fear even at their new Relationship Life if eventually they try to get into that same lane again 🤷... Like you know; Healing from a Relationship Trauma is so different Healing from physical wounds...
So I must say; some people may love it getting that Healing with their new SOULMATES, FRIENDS beside them so they don't end up damaging that door meant for YOU, ME and every other person around the world too ..
Guess you got ma point!😏
Well, that was great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
@@Richiehawk sometimes leaving is the lesson for that person to acknowledge their behavior or beliefs. My Aunt told me something a while ago when she was deciding to marry her current love or get back with her high school sweetheart. She realized that if there was any bit of doubt then it was a NO. If there was none then it was a YES. She is happily married for 25 years by choosing the YES. I know from experience, ignoring my aunt’s wisdom, that trying to make a maybe work can keep you stuck there in definitely. What they are saying here is that his answers to her straight forward genuine valid questions he made excuses and avoided answering them honestly. When someone asks a question the answer is usually a yes, no, maybe (or never). Maybe is an endless answer with zero guarantees. It is a loophole to not officially lie. A truly honest person would have said a gushing yes followed by they were nervous to bring it up. Or a no, I don’t see that for myself in the near future. Honest and forthcoming answers are respectful. Ambiguous answers is usually avoidance. The part to focus on is the person asking, as hard as it was to be vulnerable, is ready so if the other person is either there or not. That is the truth in a snapshot of the relationship. I feel that after 3 snapshot moments it is time to call it. Doesn’t matter whether it is in the same week or months. If one person feels a certain way and it is not reciprocated negative feelings are created, like feeling stuck, resentment, or unloved. That festers and most often leads to the demise of the relationship. Going back to your comment, one person can show the other person the path to healing does not guarantee they will end up together. That is a fantasy that happens to very few people. My biggest problems in relationships was staying longer than I knew I should have. Take the lesson of the relationship and move on to use it in the next.
@@PlanetZipp Honestly you nailed it🌹🤏 and i agree with you 💯..
I don't regret how long spent in a relationship instead i peacefully dissolve our connection, learn from it and move on probably being able to handle the next ...
Thanks for sharing your experience, you're amazing and I appreciate.
Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
So what do I say to him to let him know I’m not doing this and moving on?
@@brandiwalker7505 u font say nothing to him just mind your biss! He knows already he Got u in his trap!
Never be their..Priest, Therapist, Mother etc. Nothing attractive in rescuing. Why would l do that? I no longer allow my friends no mind men...to dump their stuff on me. Run. I did. Bliss
Been there done that. Move on. He doesn't have your best interest at heart. Move on. You will only get hurt.
Emotionally unavailable men are just men who aren’t emotionally available to you. I’ve seen men who claim they were so heartbroken and couldn’t get into a relationship just to meet someone they actually liked enough to get past it. They are shockingly good partners to someone else just not you because they weren’t that into you. There are no excuses. If you meet someone and they aren’t available or willing to put in the work they aren’t for you. You aren’t for them. There are some who are completely not available and emotionally immature. some guys are just not into you so they come up with excuses to keep you around because they like you enough. You are basically around so they can get their needs met until they meet someone else. Women do this as well I have male friends who have gone through this. It’s like I like you enough to keep you around sometimes it’s enough if people are clear and it’s what they both want.
Rightly said
Nah. People who keep people on the line are either das or narcissists. People who cant be alone because they are bored arent quality partners to anyone. A quality partner would not date multiple women they were not into; they would be alone.
@@antihipsterboho what is das?
Fully agreed. Why only we forget it when we are in such a scheme. Watching "he is not into you" regularly would help i guess
Omg so trueeeeeee. I have been in such a relationship with a guy who was dating too many different women while being in not named relationship with me and didnt like either of us and married completely different woman. 🤔
I felt that Audrey couldn’t finish her Thought Strings without being interrupted.
30:28 specially here! She got interrupted twice 😮😮
Blokes- they can’t help themselves.
@@1998londoner Of course they can help it. People can hold their pee, so they can hold their tongues as well.
74 people agree with this comment
Important to point this out as a reality for a lot of women in a setting of men
Just the mere fact that he hasn’t introduced her to anyone he knows is enough for me to know he doesn’t want anyone to know he’s dating her.
To feel valued, nurtured, and respected is how we should feel in any significant relationship. Your advice is spot on!
These 3 things are all women want, and yet 3 simple things are usually very hard to find in 1 individual...
Doesn't sound like she's actually got a secure attachment style, but more like she's presenting as having one, when she says things like "I know to not text too much or too little." It sounds like she's not acting from a healthy place of secure attachment, but is making calculated moves/doing all the "right" things so she doesn't scare him off. I wonder what advice she gives her clients. 🤔
Bingo. Ego driven dating.
Girl, you nailed it!!!! She’s totally presenting as secure attachment style. Anyone who announces that they are is probably not! 🤦🏻♀️
She probably gives great advice. You are better able to when you are the outsider looking into anothers persons relationship with zero stakes involved.
i agree
That's such a good point and I completely agree. If you're secure it'll come naturally and you won't be so self aware of how you are in relationships
The Goldilocks pain amount was the perfect way to describe it. This guy sounded like my ex...traumatized enough to never commit to me fully and claim to never be able to trust me, but not too traumatized to want me to be there as comfort, source of sex, and constant validation. SO GLAD I ESCAPED!
I just left a 10 yr relationship that was like this. We were bf/gf but would never spend time unless it was about His trauma, His stress, etc and he could never just enjoy the Now. Lots of promises of marriage but no follow through
My ex is a covert narcissist. This goldilocks ratio describes his "trauma" perfectly: just enough to make me excuse his toxicity and to push me to do things I wasn't comfortable with, but not enough "trauma" for him to work on it and to see the pain he caused. 2,5 years since I left him, don't miss his abusive ass one bit.
@@Vercanya mine was a narcissist too. The "white knight" kind. They use whatever they can to control us...and so hard to get out! Well done 👏
So proud of you people for leaving!
@@Vercanyathis totally relate
The pedestal effect … as soon as we value someone above us… we will always put ourselves and our needs second.
The pedestal effect is an illusion… smoke and mirrors … the person is a bog standard human being, they came into the world the same and they will leave the same.
They hold now magic powers or secrets to your heart or are the only possible person in the world who can make you feel this way ….
That is a story we tell ourselves.
No body makes us feel anything
We make ourselves feel everything
Everything comes from within
From our imagination
I agree that he’s likely a player. I dated a man like this who really manipulated me into feeling very sorry for him and it was his way of getting me to get my guard down. He ended up really being full of it.
I doubt that a person with a “secure attachment” would put up with this much, let alone start such a relationship
Every person is a “big deal” …….equally a big deal. Let him go 👋. He is not seeing other people consistently, but he is seeing other people.
Amin!!
yeah facts, F that and he has too much baggage shes already in deep and hes not into her. she will be strung along lead on and he willl put his baggage onto her and she will leave drained.. no way. she should run,
@@Ohkeh640 Agree. This guys needs therapy and she's going to be his emotional punching bag until he figures himself out. Hes probably not able to be into anyone. Emotionally unavailable people skirt the line of someone with NPD. They will pick everyone apart in order to find reasons to check out. You can never be good enough for someone like that.
The way you love yourself raises the stakes for anyone who tries to catch you.
I've always been infatuated with emotionally unavailable people, and it took me a tremendous amount of pain, therapy and soul-searching to realize I had mommy issues and found comfort in the pain I grew up with. So I'd advice anyone to ask themselves why you're looking for another one in the first place, and if you can see any reoccuring patterns.
Love your name. Im at this point, i see a patern for attracting and being atracked to emo unaivable guys. All the advice i get : love yourself. Stay single for a while. Ok but when will i be ready again? 🤣
@@renomaus6575 maybe when you know that you can trust yourself with everything that could happen to you. When you can carry yourself and can meet someone on eyelevel. When you want people. Abd not need them.
What is “ Goldilocks pain…”?
Don't chase, the right person isn't going run.
If you are traumatized by an ex, you are not ready for a new relationship. If you have not healed your wounds, you will bleed on someone else. I don't get involved with people with ongoing emotional issues. It's a nightmare and not fair for anyone involved, especially me since I am ready for a real healthy commitment. Heal yourself and make sure you are ready for the next journey. Otherwise, the new relationship will fail and more people will get hurt. You will just repeat the same patterns and waste my time. You don't have to be perfect, but at least you have to work on it and be actively doing so.
This man is emotionally unavailable, never I repeat never entertain a man or a woman who is emotionally unavailable. He’s in therapy, wish this man well in his healing recovery and move on. Everything in this situation is screaming he’s not ready to invest at-the level that you are.
That's Right! He's amazing and that was great Conversation between 'em all But as pertains to what you emphasized on; do you believe that sometimes women might be the reason for fast recovery?? I'm just curious!😏
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
@@Richiehawk Happy Holiday’s, Well…I think a woman shouldn’t be the reason why a man should have a fast recovery. What do you mean fast with "fast recovery"? This concerns me 😳, A man should recover because he wants to recover and ready to do the shadow work.
@@2.22onlyyou well, not you tho! 🌝 Just Curiousity 😁 I guess your ideology is best known to you...
Speaking of "Fast Recovering" I was specifically emphasizing on "Emotional Pains" as a result of Unhealthy and Unstable LOVE LIFE from past Partners.....
Guess you read me better this time¿ Huh!
@@Richiehawk I might not have the correct answer for you or for anyone but I can speak from experience that after going through my second heartbreak I can truly say that for the first time in my life I feel healed and so peaceful. I did my shadow work and as painful and challenging it was I now look at my past emotional pains very much needed lessons for my own growth. Harry, when we are in a broken painful place, our energy is literally attracting individuals who are in the same space we are in. I’m a true believer these individuals are a reflection of what we are putting out in the 3D. I am now in a place where I can love someone properly and allow someone to love me properly. However if I was to meet someone whose in his shadow work period and doing the work for himself I would not mind be a supportive friend nor would I mind being an ear and as blunt as I am I would also call him out if necessary. Getting on a full blown relationship wouldn’t healthy for him nor fair to me. So a woman who jumps into a relationship with a man who hasn’t healed old wounds and is letting her know he’s in therapy and doing his shadow work and she continues to push or persuade him into one should be a huge read flag for him. She’s already telling you she wants her needs met regardless where you are at in your heart space. Not cool 😎.
@@2.22onlyyou Sincerely you Nailed it all and nothing more for me to say 😂😂..
I'm so speechless 😶 and I totally agree with you, obviously I've been in same shoes and i know how difficult it was getting off and putting the past behind totally...
Honestly I'm so amazed and melted haven read such powerful and Charming wordings comes from a great and Beautiful Queen like you, sorry if calling you "Beautiful Queen" bothers you, I sincerely apologize 🤗 actually i would've appreciated it if i had known you or your name better at first ☺️ but i think you deserve "Beautiful Queen" because your words are sharp and charming 🤗..
I don't know how else to express this but I think you deserve Roses 🌹🌹🌹🌹
And if you were single then I must run away with you 😅lol😅
OMG! I just finished off a 1 month situationship just as you've described. The Goldilocks Pain Paradox is a perfect description. We as women have the "savior complex" and when a guy describes a bad situation whether it be due to their health or an ex-partner, somehow we want to rally around him and make him feel better and even when he tells us that he's not open to a relationship we will wait around hoping he changes his mind and we do everything to keep things going smoothly so he won't leave. Oh and then when they want to sleep together and not be exclusive....that is horrible! Ladies...take back your power. There are so many healthy men out there for us to meet. Keep working on your self-worth while single because then when you meet a "bread-crumber"/unavailable guy, then you will be able to walk away immediately. When a man is dealing with some type of drama from an ex partner, he is not available to give us a healthy relationship, ever. A man needs to be free and clear from all drama before he can open his heart to a new relationship and this cannot be rushed! Men's recovery from drama are like seeds...you cannot stand over it and tell it to grow and hurry up to bear fruit. It takes time and the time and healing has to be on their own time and do it alone. Ladies, we cannot help a man get over his trauma...sorry.
Plus from the email it is not possible to tell whether he has been the least bit curious about what her needs are, and what she feels commitment looks like. I read somewhere that the curiosity is something that will tip us whether a guy is relationship-worthy or not!
Men are not fixer uppers. Only houses and cars.
A man into you steps up. Calls, texts, shows up. A game player, is a time waster. Look up he's just not that into you ch1. You an option, not a priority. Game players can't commit bc they want mult gf. They have to come up with some bs. Cut him off
dang girl... all of this!! I was in a situationship for a year and a half and recently found out he went back to his ex wife. LOL SERIOUSLY?
@@unkn0wnr0ckstar Like seriously 😳 I'm so sorry about that 🤦...
And I guess you're feeling better now??
This just made me feel soooooooooo much better for putting my foot down and standing up for myself. Finally exiting a situation where "Marriage in future but wait with me till I get myself together cause I have issues, but I can't define what we are, and if you leave me you're abandoning me" carrot was being dangled. #GoldilocksParadox lol
Omg this sums up my breakup
Omgg this!!!
Any update ?
Same here. I left after I realized he had absolutely no reason to string me along me we could easily get engaged. He liked me but not enough..
I feel for this lady. I think … he is seeing quite a few people (not consistently). The fact you haven’t met his friends is a HUGE RED FLAG and that he doesn’t see you on the weekend. I’ve been in this situation and it makes you feel paranoid. Not healthy. Imagine if you had two nights with one, two nights with another etc etc. He’s having a ball and blaming his PTSD on his inability to be “consistent”. It’s a cop out and we get hooked in and feel so connected once they express vulnerability, but its a fake vulnerability designed to get what they want. Just my opinion. You deserve so much better.
This is so true. I was in a relationship with a CEO of a company for a year or so. At no point during the relationship were my needs considered. Always what he needed, what others around him needed, etc. Of course at first he made it appear that my needs mattered. I put up with this because I wasn't clear on my needs, but it resulted in a lot of pain and time lost. Be careful out there all
CEO's are often narcs as they love power
I knew one CEO who would be very rude to the wait staff. He wouldn’t communicate well too, and he’d just hand you stuff without telling you to take it or what to do with it. It was just like implicit as if he expects you to just read his mind and serve him. Just glad I got out of that unscathed because I realized that it was unhealthy very early on.
I relate to this a lot!
I hope you have found someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated ❤
literally how it’s going between me and my manager..
He's absolutely bread-crumbing her to string her along. No doubt he is seeing multiple other people. She seems a little blinded by his star power which could happen to anybody. It also sounds like he did a bunch of trauma dumping/bonding with her to keep her hooked. He sounds like he has a schtick and sounds pretty vile to be honest. "Lisa" has true empathy and he could see that in her and used it to his advantage.
Very true
That's Right!
Literally, that was a great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
All the hallmarks of a narcassist.
I loved all the laughter and comments about how dodgy this guy is, we all needed to hear it!
My note to the woman who wrote this letter: he’s just not that into you - best to move on and refocus your attentions on a mutually reciprocal relationship.
100%. NO weekends or including his friends ? Sounds really fishy to me. Move on !
As soon as you read the email I was like…wow, this woman has been blinded by her affections for this guy, and she is also lying to herself. The second you start wondering about “what your relationship is”, if the other person can’t clearly define it it means you are more invested in the relationship than the other person. She does indeed need to move on and invest her time and energy into someone else. Even if this is early on in the relationship it is clear she really cares about this man and he doesn’t.
The thing is, narcissists will usually create the illusion for those who date them, that they are rare, and that they won't find someone as amazing as them. And again, for those who are confused by such a man, it is advisable to pay attention to how he treats her, and what she really gets in the relationship. In addition, when it comes to a therapist who is dating someone like that, she may be more compassionate towards him and may intellectualize the situation too much.
Also, if a woman dates a man, she should look for how she feel in this realationship, and not fall for his stardust
Un'real'ationship more likely 😉
Well said!✅ But this days they illusions are not only created by the narcissist too. It's happening everywhere, comes anytime and a lot of good Homes, Love Life and Marriage has fall victim of this but I also understand that it takes the strong once who really know what they desire no matter what condition they face with their present Love Life. As pertains to that; everyone is free to move on with his/her Life if your partner refuses to read you better or give you that Love Life you crave for 🤷 Basically dissolving the Relationship amicably firstly before moving ahead for another🤏, just saying prolly not to leave the other person shattered just cos he/she wasn't giving you that Love Life you craving for...
Guess I'm right??😏
Well, that was great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
@@Richiehawk happy holidays!🌸🌟. I agree. I think it's a matter of values: well being and reciprocity more up in the value scale than status and being an "important" person
@@angeritchie4034 Exactly! I couldn't find better words:))
@@Richiehawk Diving deeper into it, I think that if someone has grown up lacking qualities like: love, money, status... he/she will look for them in a relationship, but because they feel lacking in these qualities, and need to first find them inside themselves, they may attract the wrong person in a relationship.
I'd been seeing a guy for 5 months. We both hadn't been seeing other people but hadn't agreed to be exclusive. We had been acting like a couple but without the commitment. He wanted to buy each other Christmas presents. I brought it up recently that we weren't exclusive and I thought we would end the conversation being exclusive. He said he wasn't seeing other people but wasn't ready to be exclusive. Which was disappointing because he had never said that before. I was looking for a relationship, his dating profile said he was looking for a relationship. I ended up calling it off. I felt blindsided but at least I'm not confused anymore.
😂 the only one who wasn’t seeing other people was you
@@Alloniya I'm in a great relationship now!
As a woman, I really appreciate Audrey's perspective, she is certainly insightful! I hope we the audience get to see her more often with you on your channel! Thank you, Audrey, for your time and energy that you help Matt to create for the audience today.
I really liked her perspective. I wish she got to go deeper with her train of thought
I find her annoying and I don't come gerefir her input. I come fir a man's perspective.
Excellent video! Really appreciated everyone’s input! If a man wants a relationship with a woman, it shouldn’t take a panel of experts to analyze and dissect the issue. There won’t even be a question. She will feel it. He will make it known.
I’m with someone (for the first time really, despite being previous married) who makes it BLATANTLY obvious that he wants to be in a relationship with me. Every single previous relationship I’ve ever been in I’ve had to call my friends constantly to ask their advice, to voice my concerns etc. This is what I should have waited for this entire time. It’s a really great feeling, to date someone without stress and worry.
@@RachelSings21 I am happy for you. I hope to find that some day.
Been there done that... I wasn't willing to wait outside his mansion till he opens the door to let me in. Moved on.
Oof 😥… she immediately justified his actions prior to addressing her concerns. This is a big red flag. Much easier to see it happening to someone else than recognize when it’s happening to you. And even when you do, you’ve been through all the unhealthy stages that end up keeping you there.
That’s why it’s so important to have outsiders and coaches/ therapists. When we are “in it” it’s tricky to see outside of it. Very easy to get reeled into “their narrative” versus “my needs”.
I have walked into this kind of situation multiple times, not necessarily that they wouldn't date me exclusively, but that they use past experiences or job or situation as excuses of why they can't fulfill my needs, and always made me feel guilty for even asking for those needs. I think I need to re-listen to this miltiple times to remind myself that I don't have to feel guilty for having needs and there is someone out there that can fulfill my relationship needs.
Boom, exactly. You said it exactly right!
@Don K your boss has power over you. Period. If your boss really cares about you; he'd support you to get a different job, or he'd get a different job.
It sounds like he wanted to see her so often so he could hopefully get love advice from her for free and help him heal from his last breakup! We women are not bandaids for men’s broken hearts.
Like seriously! 😳😳
Well, I think women can be a bandaids for men's broken heart because they're looking lots of Men out here today looking forward to that special sweet Soul to help them Heal through prolly end up happily ever after...
Guess I'm right??
Literally, that was a great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
after 5 years and 2 kids I am still hearing things like this. Anything is an excuse not to commit despite the fact we have been playing house this entire time and all of his needs are 100% met. This is what I like to call Financing an entire life on hope. If your emotionally unavailble person can figure out what you really want, they can promise it to you down the road. This finances them to the full spouse treatment and all they have to invest is a carrot on a stick and then keep living their best life. They will never pay into the dream because they don't have to and have no desire to. Once you get disgruntled enough because theyve used you up and you've got no more to give they will dump you because you've changed and they arent attracted to negativity.
Be mad at yrself for living with and making babies with a man who doesn't want to marry you.
THE BUCK STOPS WITH YOU SISTA
That’s terrible advice. Don’t be mad at yourself, they come in disguise. It’s like being a lobster in a pan, the heat gets slowly turned up so you don’t know you’re dying until it REALLY hurts. Don’t berate yourself, but get out.
The term you are describing is „future faking“ and it is really cruel. Be happy that you have your Kids. I have none because of it and if I have had more awareness or selfesteem earlier in my life this wish could have been come true…
He’s not ready for a relationship, and enjoying her companionship. It doesn’t matter how much you like someone. If they don’t want to give you a relationship, you have to move on. Judge people by their actions, especially men in this day and age in the world of dating, not by their words, or their wounds or reasons.
Btw, I’m loving Audrey. I am loving her energy. She seems like a kind soul.
I’ve had this situation so many times and every time they were seeing other women and ended up leaving for the one who didn’t obviously challenge any growth in them 🤦🏼♀️
Yes, lots of low value men tend to choose path of least resistance
Yes, safe and secure which she did say was a primary need of hers.
I always say that doormats will never have an issue dating or getting married. What guy with low self esteem wouldn’t want want a woman with no boundaries and with people pleasing tendencies.
You're the common denominator here. And who is anyone to say he isn't exactly who he wants to be and is looking for someone who will accept him for him? Believe it or not, guys are people too and have their own ideas of what's right for themselves. If you're choosing guys you want to change, that is on you, not them.Your idea of "growth" might not be shared by them.
@@csx6910 thanks for this feedback. I’ve done years of work on this as it was a long time ago - now I see it happening with men and women all around the world in my business. Everyone gets an opportunity to grow and learn and enjoy higher level experience in their next relationships- or remain the same. It’s a choice
There is something else in here. He spoke in length about his ptsd and that's when she started falling in love with him. She is also an empathetic coach. One thing is to deepen a relationship through vulnerability, and another thing is to have a rescuing pattern that might get activated when someone else's express their pain.
I think the female coach is giving her power to the big shot in that she FEELS valued because he is prominent in his industry (A Legend in His Own Mind). Consider him a dodged bullet and don’t give him an audience.
Love Aubrey’s perspective as a woman . She’s so on point of what we as women might be thinking . Great topic thank you !
That's Right!
She's amazing and that was a great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
She's a place holder. And rebound. And free advice everyone pays for. All those feelings he's vomiting on her, to get her hooked, but promised nothing. It's all about him and fake wounds. Its a lie. Dangling the carrot of a relationship in her face, but she cant quite reach it. So she put herself on a shelf. And now its all about him. It's a way to get a relationship without a relationship label. Lies. Game player, time waster. Shes now a pseudo therapist. He has one he pays!. She's an option not a priority. Playing wounded games. If he's that wounded, he wouldn't date. He started off playing games, they will get worse over time.
Wow it's like you are talking about my last relationship, he told me he was separated from his wife but he couldn't connect with me, couldn't put a name on our relation. He said he was thinking about me all the time but never had the time to talk or write a message for weeks😒. I betrayed myself because i "fall for" the potential rather than the person.
I lost 5 months with him, what a waste.
It’s not that easy to find another person you have that kind of connection with. I agree he’s not emotionally available but as a middle aged woman looking for love in a world where men value hookup culture, it’s just not as easy to just move on to the next person and find love anymore.
all the more reason to give up fast. Women have to focus on quantity to find one good guy. As we reach older ages, the good guys are about 1% of the population of available men. So we need to date 99 guys to find one good guy. Quantity is everything. Move on quickly. And, above all, find happiness as a solo woman, because the odds are very low that we will find a decent guy.
we have a connection and he acknowledges how unique it is and calls me his best friend but he can't and won't commit to an exclusive relationship but wants me to be in his life ...forever. This is after 13 years of friendship and incredible attraction and being intimate for a year. After everything was wonderful he just dropped me and he went dark. I gave him 3 months of space, to work out on whatever was bothering him and I still didn't hear from him. The day I said I had it, I am done with this...I am going to go out and put myself out there despite my broken heart, NO EXPECTATIONS, and that day, I met an amazing person whom connected with ME. The connection is different but it is just as deep and just as instant. We have so many things in common that were even more rare and quirky. He is younger then me and has been hurt but has done so much work on himself, he is ready and open for a relationship. His values are the secret things I long for. It just showed me that this is a big world and there are other possible connections if we are open to them. I put my best friend/ex-lover on a pedastel that may not have been deserved. He wants to have fun enjoy our connection but doesn't see me as his wife. Life is too short.
Girl I feel this. I think being single is better than jumping into the swamp expecting to find treasure though.
So True, I lost my husband of 48 years ,I'm 67 and the men that are out their are fat ,lazy and full of BS .
I’m learning the hard way that if you don’t feel wanted in your relationship then it’s time to go. I thought she’d change eventually but she didn’t and wasn’t even trying.
Do not go on dating apps/websites if you are not ready to date. Full stop. Go hang out with your friends instead or be open about just looking for sex.
Be respectful, be mindful. It's not that hard.
*eye roll*
It doesn't matter how amazing the crush looks to you (not only talking about looks but also status etc) - if your crush isn't making you feel good, it's not amazing. You need to change your criteria for what an amazing person is.
This hit home so hard.. It was me/is me right now.. two weeks ago we had the hard conversation about what we really are/doing and we ended up breaking off the “situation-ship” on his terms and tbh it was more of a full on relationship without the labels.. So the breakup hit me so much harder than I thought it would.. looking back Ive elevated this man to such a high level.. I’ve been so gracious to his needs and feelings.. And mine have just been left unattended and bottled until I cry into my pillow.. he wants to still be friends which I agreed with because I care about him so much.. but it’s so painful.. and I’ve been basically lying to myself that I’m okay and that this is okay and a positive thing.. but I’m internally so hurt.. and I think I need to create space between us.. but I have abandonment issues and fear of being alone.. so I’m actually the worst at distancing myself from people.. blahhh
Also I didn’t even want the situation-ship in the first place and made it clear to him that I was afraid of being hurt again and he was respectful but jokingly said “but I can’t help it if you fall in love with me” which again looking back really doesn’t feel good.. It seems he love bombed me and then when it started to get too serious he pulled all his love away and emotionally shut me out and after enduring months of that I finally initiated the conversation that deep down I knew would lead to the end of things.. I just hate how closed it has made my heart and trust againnn :(
Me too dear 😔 I’m sorry. I hope you know you are valuable and loved. I value you.
Ohhh god. Freaking same happened with me.
Happened to me too. Glad I didn't waste any more time than I did getting my heart broken. :(
Omg
Are you me ? Lmao reading this whole thing is like sooooooo close to where I’m at wowz.
I feel you on this. Going through the same exact thing. Even had the conversation about how I had feelings and tried not to see him but somehow we ended up still seeing each other with no titles. I know what I have to do but it’s so hard.
Never give up on ur authenticity for hanging on to a relationship. Be who u are, embrace ur needs, wants emotions and core beliefs.
shes enamored by a high profile person and is throwing everything she knows out the window... she needs to see other people no matter how she doesnt want to
I do agree. She sounds like she wants the "popular guy" so bad she is willing to sacrifice her mental health for it. Thats almost as sad. If it was your average joe she might have jumped ship a long time ago.
You guys are spot on. As a guy, I’ve been guilty of being blinded by the fact that a woman is both successful and beautiful, and assumed that there was more going on than their really was. It turned out it was my ego and need for validation that made me believe they were more interested in me than they really were. Love, or more accurately infatuation, is blind.
Nate, is that you?! Lol my recent ex. Think he liked the checked boxes with me, but reality hit hard.
"... the reasons don't matter - you are not in a position to give me what I need ... " OMG! Wish I'd seen this 30 years ago!!!
I once asked a guy after spending a few days together who are we to each other. He looked at me like I was crazy and said ‘I’m your boyfriend! What else were you thinking?!’
My dad once told me, "watch a man's feet. If his mouth is going one way, see if his feet follow direction. When in doubt, believe his feet."
At the time a boyfriend of mine had been talking about us getting married, even taking me to shops like Tiffany&Co. to look at rings, browsing open houses and Zillow with me to prepare for where we might live together, presumably "soon" while he "saved up for it". I knew he wasn't making a bundle and was supporting a child from his previous marriage as well as himself, so I was very understanding... But a year or two later, we were still " just looking" while I helped support him so he could save up faster.
Dad was probably right ;o)
I’m a guy and your dad is 100% right, personally this advice is for both men and women
this is true
Something similar I hear is "show don't tell" as words mean little without showing something. Pretty much the same thing but I liked the way your dad said it more.
@@nam_nam exactly, thank you. Yes, my dad has a clever way to storyteller tell it that was so compelling it broke through my denial and - what another friend calls "hopium".
Watch those divorcees especially the men with offspring. It rarely goes anywhere and you are not their main priority either. Also they don't have the funds to enter into a serious relationship.( Especially in this era) No woman should ever support a man financially etc.
My personal tactic is Never Sleep w/ a guy you're Not In a Relationship w/. The guys looking for one nites will be gone so fast you don't have a chance to care if they're 'gone'. PTSD huh? How many women has He Given PTSD??
Was it clear that they were sleeping together?
Omg this is the advice i needed. Messaging him right now. My needs matter and i just don't have the energy to invest in someone who's checked out. Ladies someone will come round down the line. Put yourself first. Thank guys.
Probably the only good dating advice I've ever seen on the Internet. These people know what they're talking about. Intelligent and clearly derived from experience for an audience of mature adults. Good stuff!
This screams out RUNNNNN. I’m sure so many are going to disagree with me, but this is THE reason I don’t think peoples should be having sex until both of them make a clear cut decision that they want to be in a relationship and committed to each other emotionally first. With this comes rings, signing of marriage certificates, setting a date, and attending premarital counseling. There is nothing good coming from giving your body to someone else before this point- it seems to inevitably lead to this situationship. It’s so so sad and always throws off the dynamics of a healthy relationship.
I totally agree with you 💯.. I feel so sad haven Known that it's Rare to fine TRUE LOVE, SOULMATE, FRIENDSHIPS AND MARRIAGE LIFE this days 🥺🥺💔
I pray they God save us all prolly for everyone to understand the good rewards for building a decent and healthy Relationship Life following the Dynamics of decent bonding as pertains to what you emphasized on...
That's Right!
She's amazing and that was great Conversation between 'em all..
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
Women feel way more bonded after sex than men. Due to this they hang on to situationships screaming of red flags. Without the sex eyes and mind would see things way clearer and walking away would be wasier. See also how Hollywood and tv are feeding as thinking asif hookup culture is normal. Jersey Shore, ex on the beach, temptation island, we are constantly brainwashed into thinking sex is not really a big deal, just do it and enjoy.
@@nikajsify nice wordings, I agree with you 💯
You're indeed an amazing woman! Btw; here are Roses from me to you 😁🌹🌹🌹🌹
Merry Christmas and Happy new year 🥳🥳
Agree!
Agree !!!
Everything you said here is true. But I would like to add that the fact that Lisa has apparently been seduced by celebrity says something about her that I don't think is healthy. I'm from LA and I have known a number of people who are swept off their feet by celebrity, so much so that they will throw better people aside for the opportunity to hang with a celebrity. Lisa's stress on the "big deal"ness of the guy reminded me of these people. I think there is a deep-seated issue there that needs to be addressed.
Lisa already knows the answer. She wanted you to tell her she was wrong. I hope you guys helped her feel more comfortable letting go.
Fully agree with Jamison. I felt it immediately - from the fact that she lost her center and felt a need to ask you (when she herself knows relationship stuff), to the ways she lifts him up as soooo perfect, to - yup - his vagueness and bullshit. Let's remember, even fully diagnosed narcissists are just broken souls. . . so we don't have to diss him, just get the heck out of his orbit.
Audrey is just such a pure soul. Everytime I see her in a video, I get a warm feeling. Well done, Matthew!
That's Nice!
He's amazing and that was a great
Btw; I'm wishing you Merry Christmas and a happy week ahead 🤗, Stay happy healthy and safe friend 👍
he is single that is why
@@LuisRodriguez-qu8pb oh! Thanks...
That's cool!!
She reminds me of my best friend , a Myers briggs type ENFJ
She's so wise! Love her.
"when you treat someone like a celebrity they treat you like a fan." She sounds like she is putting the guy on a high pedestal.
I had to break up with someone stating just that. I would like to be in a committed relationship and this is not something that you can offer me and that is okay, but that means I need to remove myself from things. Took me a few years and a pandemic to finally get there. Because I felt so grateful that anyone chose me, since for me dating is kind of rare. I really liked him, I know he really liked me, but was NEVER going to be what I wanted. Took my power back. And didn't have to be angry to do it. It helped.
Find you first and love you first before you look for love and relationships
Thanks for this. I was in a similar situation earlier this year with a man I had been seeing for 6 months. In the end he wasn't ready for a relationship but wanted to remain friends and keep seeing me. I walked away from him and never contacted him again. It was so painful. It was a split second decision because he had started to become inconsistent due to his mental issues (so he said....) and I was not happy anymore. I just knew continuing a friendship with him would be too painful and not fair to me. Like you said he gets what he wants and I'm left with nothing I want.
I have been questioning my self for months about if I did the right thing. After listening to this I have a new perspective on it so thank you 😊
Warning … this man is dangerous for your happiness!
Matt, nailed it with the Goldilocks situation! you have said before something as spot on … some people will distract you with their chaos to avoid giving you what you need!”… mind blowing advice 😀
I have so much compassion for this Lisa. Being a coach I assume it's extra difficult to admit you have a blindspot. Definitely sounds like an unhealthy situation and (conscious or subconscious) manipulation.
16:40 is the truth, when someone has a story explaining why they can’t be available, or can’t act right etc., RUN. I have had this happen so many times, and actually believed some really crazy stories.
The fact is, whenever I have gotten into a serious relationship, they guy made it known they were interested right away, and there were no crazy stories,
Hi, would you please discuss love-bombing and future faking versus an extraverted guy being genuinely interested and emotionally expressive right from the beginning?
Love bombers come quickly but their excitement doesn't last long.Look if actions meet words and give it time as the flakey ones will drop off themselves
@@Selfloveyoga1111 but they say love bombing can even be in a marriage where one partner has a hidden agenda
Having been the person who has done the Love Bombing and now realize where it comes from it is this. It usually stems from a point of view
1.Projecting what they desire and makes them feel emotionally safe.
2.Trying to form a quick connection due to having an anxious Attachment style
3.wanting to secure their hold on you so that you won't want to go to anyone else and are fighting insecurities.
I have been guilty of all 3 of these situations and someone with a Secure Attachment will catch on to it really fast.
Have a conversation with him and just call it out as it is and see if it screams the Extraverted side or what I have stated above. Maybe he does not even realize he is doing it and why he is doing it. I did not know until a female friend told me about it. If he is a affectionate person then he needs to be informed in order to realize how to tone it back and match your energy and become in sync.
@@mike198383 Thank you, I appreciate your comment a lot, now I see that not always such behavior might hide some bad intentions. I don't mind anxious attachment style, since I like taking care of people and am nurturing. Also #3 is flattering, #1 is dangerous though...
@@Aliena92 So I could talk to you more about the anxious part. Being nurturing and wanting to take care of someone is a good thing but be careful with that as you can then slip in to being their mother. I just got out of a relationship where we both had the same attachment style and i see the ramifications of that. This has to be seen in Therapy which is why i'm seeking it and my eyes and knowledge have been opened up tremendously.
I’ve been dating someone the last three years. I was just checking in on Mathew! I feel like you really kept me company in a way back when I was single. Lol. Thanks for being such a wonderful person and there for all the searching souls out there. Hang in there everyone. And enjoy all the freedom, the world has so much potential around each corner for you. Life will surprise you! Believe in your worth and others will see it, too
After 3 yrs no marraige move on
This is so sweet ❤ needed this!
❤
Literally the same happened just now with a lady a couple of days ago. Maybe I'm wrong but often these feelings come out as warnings to us. Our bodies or souls warning us. We ignore it and blame it on a defect. Instead of listening to ourselves.
"You have your reasons, but I have my reality"
No doubt he sees her profession as a challenge & may get a massive ego boost by being able to make her fall for him. I hope she runs far away! 🏃🏼♀️
This is so spot on. I have been in a relationship like this for 6 years. When I finally ditched him it took him 3!!!!! weeks to find another girl.
they always do that, we should be taught self worth at school x
6:09 agreed. If he’s that serious about his mental health and healing from his previous relationship I don’t think he’d be entertaining anyone and he’d be focusing on himself. He’s clearly not over it yet.
My personal therapist and several types like yourself preach. Date the person that you have, the person they are in the present. Too many women get caught up in the hopeful situations. Hoping he'll change, hoping he'll realize he loves you, hoping he'll be the man that you met on the 1st date that swept you off your feet. The person you have is what you are dating. If they are not meeting your needs or are gaslight going you, that is the person in the present and that person is not being a proper partner. You have to base your decisions based on what you have, not what you COULD have. I have had this problem for yrs, been working on it these last few yrs
I'm with Jameson on this one. This guy sounds like hard work. Honestly, I couldn't be arsed with it.
You would know if a guy wants you. If you are confused, then it's a no.
17:45 Everyone, listen to this and listen and repeat and listen and repeat, and come back to this and listen again. This will SAVE u a lot of time and heartbreak in your life. This is a GEM.
My boyfriend is so pure listening to this story. He doesn't understand what the guy is doing wrong because he's never had these kind of selfish intentions with women. I say that having been his friend for nearly a decade before we started dating.
I love yr bf 😍😍😍😍
@@007nadineL he's wonderful ❤️
This is tough. I kind of lean towards leaving this guy behind. I have ptsd, and if I have met someone I am really into, I would go into it together 🤷♀️ nothing can hold me back when I have strong feelings for someone
I think that’s great if the other person also wants to work on their PTSD or other self work. It would be beautiful to heal with someone else, but I don’t think this guy wants that at all.
Yeah - key words going into it together, but it's a losing battle if Cocky Tom isn't willing to put in the work and help himself through his pain. What he needs to do is work towards finding ways to be happy alone first before bringing his trauma into his relationships.
You're also NOT a man
I'm 💯 for guys going to therapy, but unless you've done the work yourself, you don't know what to look for. After therapy and putting in the work, you'll be able to spot what BS looks like and you'll never have to question where you stand because you know what to look out for. Some guys will use their vulnerability and going to therapy as an excuse for their sh** behavior to get compassion from women....but unless the guy does the healing work in therapy, it doesn't mean sh**. She needs to get off the idea of his celebrity status and move on if she knows her worth.
OMG... Please do more of these roundtable talks. The dynamics of the group are GREAT.
The sad truth, trauma people, self sabotage and some people.dont want to change at all or heal their trauma, I love this video happy I decided to stop and watch it I know I have been gas lighted several times I have been trying to explain my side and what I know and teach as well. I had to let me twinflame go one male is really wanted to get to know more grow with love but he doesn't care I know he doesn't truly he thinks he can manipulate me and try to tell me not to care sorry buddy spiritual healers help ppl, shaman medicine men, etc. Self love is the best love great video love and light 🕯️
I am a psychologist and i loved your answer Matthew! Also Audrey is amazing when she speaks! It really revolved around how staying true to our needs and truth is more important that engaging in self-betrayal in order to "finally receive love form the other person" or "make them change", which is always unfortunately the subconscious thought or "trap" when this happens. Good team guys, keep up with the good work.