Advice For Artists Who Are Too Hard On Themselves
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- čas přidán 1. 03. 2020
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MAn, this was emotional as hell, how was I supposed to draw thru the tears??? Seriously tho, my therapist says to me the same things, being kind and compassionate to ourselves is key. I still find it very hard tho. Thank you for sharing, this was amazingly interesting and a great talk.
My therapist said this too and it opened my eyes. Before hearing that I thought that caring for myself was the same as egoism. That thought was so fucked up! We don't really learn this stuff until we really need it I guess. It was a turning point but I am honestly not over it yet and who knows if I ever will be. I was bullied for years and that caused a trauma. It was my "normal" and to this day I have to remind myself that it isn't normal. And that I shouldn't listen to the inner voices telling me that I am not good enough to be liked or loved. Sometimes I just survive on a day to day basis. But that is fine. I shouldn't blame myself for that. We are all works in progress as humans.
I love you. You are worth being compassionate towards. Speak to yourself how you would speak to a very close friend.
@@oficado58 Thanks for the reminder❤ I'll try to get better at that. And I need to distinguish the voices better. Some are just echos of the past and I need to leave them there. I know that it is possible to reprogram our mind. It may take a lot of training and repetition until the new thoughts finally stick but I won't give up. I want to be in control of my feelings again.
kanachiaki holy fuck same lmao
@@oficado58 when you never had close friends and the only 'friends' only backstabbed you and left you behind, how do you know how to be your own friend?
No sage at all. More like a caring father conversation that I rarely experienced before, thank you
💗same
thats nice way to describe this video
exactly
When you said "art isn't something you're going to master" I felt a wall inside my mind break. Thank you for that, I can't count how many times I had said to myself "no, not yet, it isn't good enough, it's not perfect"
Imperfectly perfect or perfectly imperfect is what your art should be not anyone elses opinion or standards just your way to interpret the world or your own emotions through the expression of that work of art! I struggle with things trying to perfect details and not painting that much but oh my god drawing was and still is my religion.............!!!!! So It made me more comfortable but at the end of the day I realized that even with my originality I still didn't need to try to perfect more just to enjoy experimenting different themes!!!!!!! sci-fi, horror, fantasy, etc! Even trying to make my drawings slightly realistic I know it looks very different from other people's work!
Right! I hadn’t even considered that it’s something we don’t have to master. That’s not even the point. Such a freeing idea 🙌🏾
We are fed cultural fables simply by hearing famous artists referred to as "The Old Masters". This implies there is a supreme level of art - a rank to be acquired, a set to be completed. That it is possible to become "the" authority on the concept of art.
But I guarantee that every single classical artist referred to as an "Old Master" in this example, was challenged by every piece they worked on. They would have had to learn new things and solve new problems each and every time. They never "finished" art.
😭
When I heard that, it had the opposite effect on me. My heart sunk; I took it to mean I'm never going to be satisfied with my art.
Hi Adam, I hope you like this quote, some of my friends mistreat themselves a lot and I always tell them In a funny way:
"Do not mistreat yourself, because the person you are mistreating is my friend".
Thanks for the video, have a nice day.
Hmm, I love that. I really like love that
@@AdamDuffArt Glad to hear that!
i was 10 min in, just reflecting it all and the moment I turned to your comment the water taps in my eyes opened
What if I have no friends? :P
LEGO Metaworld . Well then u don't have to listen to their whining & self criticism... I would say lack of friendship is a choice... just as nurturing friendship is a choice too.but alone =Al ONE
"We spend so much of our lives being hard on ourselves and being gentle to everybody else."
As an elementary school teacher and artist, I felt that statement in my very soul. Thank you. Your videos are incredible.
“There’s not a goddamn thing wrong with you. Stop that.”
Thank you for the reminders, kind human.
your friend's words hit me like a bullet holy shit
had to pause for a cry break unironically
The emotion in his voice during this part was so palpable that it had me shaken up as well.
I am elated to have come across such a meaningful video, and hope that many more can watch this and consider his words of advice as well.
i guess we all did
I've been called lazy and unmotivated for many years when I was in school up until highschool because I have trouble concentrating for long periods of time and it became really hard for me to attempt or invest myself in anything because I kept running away from things that looked to difficult or time consuming and basicly killed my drive to do anything constructive up until a few months ago when I started to learn to draw.
I had tried to do it a few years back but stopped when it became to hard like I did before. I realize that the self doubt and the voice in my head telling me to give up and go do something else is not my own and I've been having a hard time stopping it. I fell into addiction and depression for a long time cause I didn't know what to do and I still feel moments where I might slip back in them but learning to draw has really been a way for me to prove to myself that I'm not lazy, that I'm not unmotivated. I listen to a lot of your videos when I draw and thank you so much for them. They've really helpt me in some bad times when that voice telling me to give up was the loudest.
Dude I'm almost in the same situation as yours. Glad that you're trying your best to work on it. :)
I can relate, all the best to you ❤️
That sounds like ADHD
Yes! I'm fighting this too. And even if this is a complication of ADHD (like myself), I absolutely believe that we can rise above it and make something awesome.
i can relate to the first part except i can't even focus on drawing. as it's also too difficult and overwhelming. dropped out of art college too four years ago. haven't done much at all this year.
I leave most of my drawings unfinished because I always think that they don't look good enough and after I actually complete a drawing it doesn't take long until all I see in that piece is only what I consider to be flaws, so when I show them to my friends and they say something positive I always tell them that they really good and other people would of made something much better. I can't really remember the last time I actually stopped and thought that what I made looked good, that probably is why I find myself drawing less nowadays. I quitted the architecture highschool I went to because I thought that I am not as creative as the others and that most of them were much better suited for this than I was but now that i think about it nobody told me this, I was the one thinking like this. This video was verry helpful, it made me open my mind.
Don’t tell people their compliments are wrong. Say thank you even if you don’t believe it and it will make you both feel great!
Oooh, totally feel this.
I used to mock myself how bad I am at drawing and start questioning myself why do I start picking up art rather than studying for a better life, and I'm still doing it. But thats how I really get better and better and better, and now I realize why I pick up drawing.
People have different feelings for why they pick up or start drawing, but for me I do it for what we can do by drawing. I can convey a lot of feelings without speaking, with just a person standing in edge of a mountain looking a really beautiful scenery can convey thousand of feelings like love, sadness, adventurous, nostalgic, etc.
I really don't know why I'm posting this, but I just really want to say it. But just remember we walk through the same pain but with a different reason. Don't hate yourself because you're bad, love yourself because you're growing.
sit with those negative feelings, dont fight them when they come up - but dont join in those feelings fighting you either. just sit with them, let them pass you by, like waves of the ocean, take some deep breaths. you're safe, you're okay. let them fade out peacefully
This is probably the most valuable message I have ever heard about being an artist. Thank you.
Thx for the video again!
Reminded me of this great quote:
“I am not what I think I am, and I am not what you think I am. I am what I think you think I am.”
- Charles Cooley
You're the only person to ever say these things to me and I hurts so much. I can't stop the tears
It's amazing to know someone cares and understands 💜
It really is.
Sameeeeeeee omg
Adam: "I hope it didn't get too heavy today."
Me: (literally crying) well, it did
I literally cried when you started "color dodging" me at the end...This video, It's like it was recorded for me personally. Having someone actually saying something about these clouds in my head really helps a lot. (The "fear of hurting someone" one was especially huge.) Thank you, Adam.
"There's not a god damned thing wrong with you." "Have some compassion for yourself." "Art is something you're never going to completely master -- that's not the point." So many gosh heckin' good quotes in here...
Thanks, Adam. I'm glad CZcams pointed me here. With this quarantine, I haven't been able to see my therapist, and it's been getting rough on me mentally, but everything you've said here in this video have been topics me and my therapist have been going over. It's incredibly moving to hear it, specifically HEAR it and not just see it written on Twitter or something. And not only from another human being, but from an artist of your talent.
In college, for four years, when I was just learning my fundamentals and trying to find my path, I was continually berated from multiple angles. That I was indecisive, that my interests were too broad, that a goal I may have picked or an artist I did a presentation on wasn't "good enough", and that the projects I would make for homework or for finals weren't deep enough or "too illustrative". After years of that, you can imagine how much I appreciate the story at the beginning of "they begin to think that about themselves", because it's something I struggle with almost a decade later. I'm only now starting to find the confidence to shrug that stuff off, and figure out what I want to do for -me-, rather than for my peers or for some imaginary standard of "good enough". There's still fear, of course, but I'm taking those steps.
But I end a lot of my work days berating myself, or finding myself mid-painting each day suddenly hating my colors, my brushwork, my composition, anything and everything, like the nitpicky college critiques. I never thought that it might be learned from hearing it constantly from others throughout school; I just figured it was how everyone approached art if it was being told to me in an educational setting. You can't hear inside another artist's head, yeah? So it just... Never occurred to me that I was being disgusting to myself. That that isn't necessarily normal. So thank you. Sincerely. Thank you.
I know this maybe doesn't need to be said in a comment this ramble-y, especially maybe not in a CZcams setting, but I wanted to add myself to the pile of comments saying thank you. I have a lot to think about thanks to you. And I will try to be more compassionate to myself. And to this painting I better get back to. Keep up the great work; I'll be keeping an eye out for more videos~ Cheers.
"have some compassion for yourself"
I will, I'll try
Hits home like a truck. But i'm glad i heard it.
You really are an artistic lifesaver. The encouragement you put out is touching so many. Thank you.
I don't have people that really understand making art, insecurity and the things I care about. Listening to your video's is like advice from a friend.
I echo your words completely. This was life-changing to view
First of all love the concept, beautiful painting.
Secondly, really appreciate the converstation this highlights. I've been told I'm my own worst enemy and it seems there's always a version of myself present, tearing me down on the daily and humiliating the simpliest of interations. I was told quite often as a child I was stupid and now I'm afraid to ask questions, I hope someday I stop doubting myself in a cruel way. Anyway thanks for the great video.
You deserve the answers.
I'm not an artist but a writer and I can say I agree with you. So thank you for sharing your thoughts. I will share this video on the internet and try to help others as well.
With tears streaming down my face, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for putting out this video!!
Thank You. I always find myself constructing szenarios in my head that tell their own stories and become so autonomous that I sometimes end up infuriated over an illusion. It feels too real. Creative people need discipline over their mental state. And because the current global mindset is in opposition with most creative mindsets, we need more willpower to walk against the stream. Don't read news. Don't lose yourself in "smart"phones. Don't overstimulate yourself with too much artistic options. Make peace within yourself and let it flow.
You help so much and completely see everything for what it is. Im autistic recently diagnosed ( I guess why Iv missed so many opportunities throughout my life) and I can tell you dealing with simple things is hard at the best of times but art calms me down but knowing to achieve things in a chaotic world seems a mind field. And finally now years later I realised what I want to do I feel Im having to catch up. But your calming words are so amazing.
I recently read or hear something similar „if someone treats you as bad a you often do yourself, you would probably try to stop interacting with that person“ (sorry forgot the source).
I have always struggled with self esteem, and I know that it’s practically self harming but still it’s much easier to know that actually practice this advice. Just because it’s probably for most a habit that we do a long time now.
Never thought I would actually cry, currently going through a few things personally and I can not talk to anyone about it. But in all honesty, most people tend to think of themselves as imperfect, or just monstrous when in reality they are the opposite. You should never take yourself for granted as well, all of you have such beautiful minds and you need to know that. ;)
I found this channel by accident. I dont draw much just casualy. And i found this chilling my violin teacher after 1 month of knowing me told me: "you are to hard with youself, if you dont allow yourself to make mistakes you wont grow or experiment" . This Is hard to swallow. Myself I Said once "the mind Is mirror maze, every gift become his oposite somewere, if you are insecure probably also humble , good selfsteem keep the ego in check. ". I didnt think that a perfeccionist could be cruel with herself, a creative build the better maze of ideas . Tnks alot your soul Shine trought this drop of virtual wisdom on the lake. You Will be a awesome dad
I struggle with my mental illness really bad, and it says so many horrible things to me. Thank you for this video. A lot. I feel like I'm being burned alive by the thought of drawing almost every day, and hearing what you've said is.. Let's say that I'm crying my eyes out right now. Thank you so much again. 😭❤
I needed this, so so much. Being to hard on myself is something that plagues my life every day, and it causes me so much stress. And more importantly, it seems to materialize the more I do it. I notice that when I don't over criticize myself, I actually function better,more often, and for longer periods of time, than if I were to just keep hating on myself. Thank You so so much Adam, this is wake up call for me
I don't understand CZcams algorithm, but I'm glad that it recommended me this video. A few days ago, I had to do a presentation about my art progress for a class. I practiced doing my presentation and didn't find anything off. But, when I presented in front of the class, the first thing my professor told me after I finished was that I should give myself more credit. Most of the words I use to describe myself as an artist were negative. I didn't notice how much I used self-degrading words like dumb, stupid, and unsatisfied in my presentation. I guess I used it too often that it feels normal.
Thank you so so much for this video. I needed to hear it as words to realize how much of a big deal this is, especially for my mental health :)
Have compassion for myself. Thank you for all my tears. You’re amazing.
i just went through first year uni in a very intense 9-5, 5 day a week fine art course and never in any of those days did either myself or any teacher around me say that my art or myself was talented or worth something - and there's only so many times that you can pick yourself up without even a little bit of outside influence - so just hearing you say (even though i don't know you or you dont know me) that i was talented hit me so strangely hard - thank you so much for reminding me to look after myself
Everytime I feel down or depressed or unmotivated as an Artist.... I always come back to this video...and it helps me a lot thanks!
All of this is quite moving, and I have been trying to practice it thoughourly myself - but for some reason the biggest thing to hit me was the off-hand comment of "creating synapses that don't exist."
Like, I kinda knew that on some level, but I never processed it? Artists are literally creating memories, concepts, things - out of nothing. No matter how it may end up looking on paper, or how you feel about it, you're making something that would *never exist* if you didn't put the work in to make it. That's bloody incredible!
Hello Adam, once again when the voices in my head swirl with doubts about myself, you manage again, without fail, to silence them. Thank you.
Damn I played this to start my day. Didn't expect to have tears! But we all need this so thank you.
Whenever Adam say "happy painting" it makes me smile and happy and relaxed. It makes my day. Thank you Adam.
I like to create stories. They come to me as easy as water from the sky on a rainy day. And I always think they are silly. Silly little stories a silly woman came up with. I really should stop saying those things to myself. I realized this listening to you. Thank you for speaking about things that matter most.
You've helped me rekindle my burning desire draw again. I was always so hard on myself, blaming every inconsistencies towards my drawings for having the lack of talent. I know now that having compassion to oneself is key to living a positive life. Sure,I'll never be the next Leonardo da'vinci but that's the point, it gives me purpose to be better even if it takes 10 to 20 years I will know how much I accomplished by that point. All I want to say is thank you and that you are an inspiration to me. Keep up the good work!
I acknowledge that I'm hard on myself and I know that I do it only out of a desire to improve, but I have a hard time separating my criticism from the value of my art. I know I'm not actually a horrible artist, and I know that I can create pieces that look decent. I just can't stop devaluing my own work because of my criticisms.
I feel like if I was able to see any sort of progress in the work I do that it would be so much easier to overcome the crushing disappointment I feel whenever I draw something and it doesn't immediately look decent.
I've been learning how to juggle clubs recently, got em for christmas, and it's so easy to see progress that I make in that. I have a tangible measurement of how I've improved through the number of catches I can do increasing, or slowly being able to catch a second club without hitting my fingers. It's easy to see the progress.
With art I just don't see improvement in my work. I still think a sketch I did years ago is just as good as any of the completely colored works I've done recently because I don't remember it being challenging. I didn't even consider being an artist at that time, I just drew it because I felt like it, and it turned out good, really good for my standards at the time.
Since then my standards have gotten higher, I know the kinds of incredible art there is out there. So many incredible artists in the world and I put myself and my art to their standards because that's what I want to be able to do. If I'm going to do art as a career I HAVE to be able to do work at those difficult standards.
I know that it's not reasonable to expect myself to be at those standards, and I know I shouldn't devalue my own work when it doesn't meet those standards, but I just can't seem to. I don't do it intentionally, I just can't seem to separate my current work from my goals standards.
This video was very inspiring and the thought of being able to look at my work and be happy with it, see what I did and acknowledge the successes I've had, is a refreshing one. I really hope I can find a way to.
You talk in a way where it feels like you truly care about each and every one of us that watch your video. It feels amazing and very loving, thank you.
Ten minutes in, and I'm already crying. I'm not a person who cries easily, not at all, but I am a person who struggles with what they used to be and what they feel they're not anymore. I'm also a person who has recently been feeling like shit, feeling worthless, feeling _useless_. This, in contrast, feels like reassurement, like a speech from an actual loving father who's teaching me about life. I'm not stupid. I'm not useless. I'm not dumb, weak, worse. Thank you, sir. I really needed this.
Edit; as someone from, indeed, Santiago -although Santiago de Chile and not Santiago de Compostela as was probably referenced-, I can wholeheartedly confirm. I kept crying throughout this video, I loved ever second of it. Thanks once again.
genuinely thank you for having the guts to upload this and actually speak about it on a personal level. It's spoken about a bit in some videos on youtube but they're not personal and it just feels like they're talking at you. This video genuinely hits hard in the right spot. Thank you.
To quote South Park; "I'm not your friend, buddy." Hell I started getting annoyed by all the compliments and nice things you were telling us, your viewers. If that isn't an example of being hard on yourself, then I don't know what is. Rationalizing self-insults and not knowing how to take compliments or give myself compliments is something so many need to work on. How hard is it for some people including myself to just say, "thank you" after receiving a compliment. Well, thank you Adam, thank me for listening :P
Thank you, sir. Thank you.
I stopped drawing for a few years, went into depression wormhole, overcame it, tried drawing again, got depressed and self doubt all over again.
Art is the absolute best and worst thing ever in my life. Sometimes I ask myself if I didn't come to know the wonder of art, would I be this devastating?
But in the end of the day, after all the crying, it is art that save me from itself over over. It's like a bless and a curse at the same time.
But I guess that's just life. I just have to live with it.
Adam made me cry two times so far, with two different videos. His voice is so gentle and he sounds like a dad I always needed to tell me those kind of things. I'm so grateful for finding your channel.
This hit home and I was in tears while trying to draw listening to this. Thank you for sharing, it hit home so hard, as a child I was severely emotionally abused by an aunt, and everything you said was louder than words with how it resonated, just how true it is, I have Avoidant Personality Disorder now and that mental disorder is the aspect of self-destruction, breaking yourself down on a daily basis and telling yourself you are useless and worthless. What you said gave me a perspective to look at, thank you for that. This was all beautifully spoken.
You're not what you were taught to be for better or worst, but what you make with what people gave you!!!!!!!!!!! You can grow out from that past abuse knowing there are advantages you have in your mind and heart! It's not just discipline or whatever technique you learn about a subject but the compasion for others! The compasion and love for others is what feeds our true meaning and purpose in life!!!!!! Everything else people tell you, that you have to be the media, your parents your aunt and the fricking government is straight out bullshit! You know in your heart who you are and what you want to be! A compassionate person who cares for others and living his best life that's a life worth living for! Never give up my friend we all have struggles!!!!!!
Thank you so much for helping me and others, i can’t help but imagine how great it is to be one of your students.
It's criminal this doesn't have more views, this was wonderful, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
That scenario you were talking about in regards to the self anger and everything perfectly describes my life situation to a T. Was hard to fight back tears because it felt like you were narrating my head.
Though, being an artist, this advice goes beyond drawing and into the heart of our truest selves. Thank you for this video. I needed to hear this.
I was staring at this video for so long before I clicked it. I love your videos but all that was going through my head when I read the title of this one was: "I don't need this one, I'm not too hard on myself, I am too BENEVOLENT. I should be harder on myself so why would I click this." But it was the way that voice was getting suspiciously loud that made me click it, it made me question whether telling myself that I am TOO SOFT is part of being too harsh.
.
And gosh, am I grateful for clicking it. This shifted my point of view to the direction I thought I'd never look through, hell, I didn't even imagine this angle existed. What your friend told you when you said how hard it hit, let me say, it hit SO hard with me, honestly not as much about my art or art-wise actually but with literally every other aspect of my life.
I'll think about this long and hard and I will try my best to use that one sentence the best I can. I also know a person who NEEDS to hear this asap and I'm going to share it right after I post this comment. This needs to be spread, you help so many people with - as you said - giving those thoughts a shape, calling them out, it's incredible. Thank you from the bottom of my heart ♥♥♥
Its nice to have words of wisdom, love and compassion around, thank you Adam. God Bless you
Hearing someone else say all the things I feel all the time makes me feel less alone. Thank you.
This is such an important topic, and one that the harsh mind will rarely think of on its own, at least when you're a teenager/young adult and busy with work on top of drawing. So thanks for putting it up on the spotlit pedestal it ought to be on.
Also cheers for listening to the viewers regarding audio sound, this is much better (at least for my speakers).
Adam, I have to confess that I owe you a huge thank you after listening to this video.
In the past I enjoyed creating stories much more, feeling freedom in jumping from one story to another when I couldn't come up anything for story I was working on. This enjoyment eventually decayed away, when my ex-friend came into picture. She basically sneaked her way into one of my stories by making fan fiction from world I had once built with quite a lot of open options still being there. My mistake was to let her in to co-operate one part of it. To continue with the mirror analogy: over the years she lifted this mirror where I could see how horrible person I was for not giving her enough information, so we could continue making the plans on the story. Something behind my back of my head was nagging me badly about the way I was basically bombarded with questions, which sometimes had no relevance to our stories.
All these "what if" and "What would character X think/say/do" eventually began to consume me to the point when my mind just stopped functioning about stories, and I blamed it on art block at first, since I had nothing else to point my finger at. And she kept the mirror up to remind me how I was just horrible person, going as far as telling me that I wasn't a creator, just consumer when I was searching ways to remedy my creativity back to what it was. Never before I had felt like dying so badly, but thankfully my boyfriend kept me away from harming myself further. Even after we broke our friendship, I couldn't see anything else beside how horrible I was to not come up with much more to stories we were working on.
Today you broke that mirror into pieces and gave me a much better mirror to reflect myself from, allowing me to actually stop being so harsh and cruel to myself. I know it probably isn't much to you, Adam, but I am very grateful that you are making these videos. I thank you a lot for this.
I have now listened/watched this video for the 2nd time and realized so many things again. It helps hearing this. Thanks so much for this Adam. It means the world to us.
I came here for a video focused on a sort of critique of artists and the problems they create for themselves and I was met not only with an incredibly relaxing and honest environment, but also a strange kind of closure.
I have doubted myself and my art for years now, always looking at what I could be and getting frustrated at how I can't seem to draw what my head sees. For ages I've always struggled with accepting that progress takes time. I've always wanted to be the best at something right when I start it and I often get frustrated and give up when it doesn't work out the way I wanted it to. Those around me have always told me my art is amazing and the work I do always has some sort of passion to it, even if its a messy sketch or concept that doesn't look anatomically correct or clean.
I always told them thank you, but I never took it to heart. I always felt (and still do) that there was always more to do. Always something I could do better or more of. I promised myself this year I would listen more to myself and take care of myself as my new years resolution, and its hard. But knowing what I need and want will always be more important than anything.
Recently I've had an artblock of a type that isn't born of burnout or lack of inspiration. I felt constantly obligated to draw the characters I loved from a novel I'm working on and nothing else. Like it was some sort of job. And recently ive found more pleasure in drawing gesture studies from my head to see what sort of poses I could come up with, and drawing characters from games I've played.
I realized that I was so focused on making a career out of my art and desperately trying to sharpen the blade of my skills that I was really just sitting between a wall and a canvas, staring at the idea that I had to work on x thing in order to succeed. Maybe I should make x thing because maybe it'd work out.
If I wasn't so hard on how I am "not as good as I want to be, but im not improving fast enough" I think not only would I draw more and improve faster, but I'd enjoy it a lot more. I'm hoping here soon to begin drawing just because I want to, and not because I feel obligated to draw x thing.
And then this video popped up, and it was probably the most calming video I've listened to in a long time. Thank you.
There are too many videos out there about what artists should/shouldn't do that just don't put the artist first. It just makes it seem like the thing behind the art is less relevant than the art itself. So thank you for this. Not only was it a wonderful video that felt genuine and special, but you also have the voice of an angel and that made it much easier to listen to.
I needed to hear this. Thank you, Adam.
I was having doubts and struggling to overcome this and draw for a long time now and you got me in a moment where I'm trying to rethink stuff and have a different perspective, I think this conversation is what I was looking for, thanks dude!
Man, thank you for existing!♥️😔 You just tell everything that I've been feeling
thank you for this Adam!
The one thing that came to my mind at some point, is how a lot of artists, specially young ones. When showing their sketchbooks always say something like: "its not very good" or worse.
I stopped doing that to myself, and I always try to encourage others to stop doing it too.
For two reasons, one because we shouldnt treat ourselves that way.
And secondly, because in my mind if someone is showing me something, whatever it is, and before I have the chance to look into it, they say its not good, or its crap. I immediatly lose all interest in it.
We are instantly taking away all the value from our work before even giving the person looking at it the chance to make their own decisions.
One of the most profound messages I've heard. I'm going to re-watch and chew over this for a VERY long time. You definitely cut right through the shit we are thinking and spill it all out onto the table!
This is exactly what I needed to hear and I imagine a lot of others do to, I admire your courage thank you 💕💜💕💜
As an artist, trapped in a self-sabotaging thing and currently in a depression, I can say this is a welcome video to see. Thank you!
I recently sent you an email where I shared what I'm going through and questioning my art. Since then I have been learning and listening to your library. I know this was 3 years ago but today, you spoke to me! My spirit thanks you because I haven't been listening to it. I always felt (and thought) "It must be me, I am horrible" but today through tears I have my color dodge brush in hand!!!
I like to think of myself as being a bit tough on the mental side but this resonnated with me so much and I can't even believe how much I needed to hear this. Thank you
Thanks for cracking open my mind, Adam! Your encouragement is impeccable.
when your own grade school teachers tell you your stupid...it resonates in your head for decades after... and it's very difficult to believe otherwise.
Thank you for this. I'm 31 and now starting to realize I'm more sensitive than I thought I was. I'm learning more about myself and I see why I'm an artist.
I'm extremely hard on myself. My best friend's tell me this all the time. I work 10-12 hr shifts in construction, hit the gym 4x a week, draw regularly, have a 7 year old daughter who I see every weekend. I'm a very active and driven person, yet Im very critical on everything I do. It always come from a place that says "I can do more" even though I'm already doing so much. It causes me to be late on commissions or straight up not even do them.
My best friend tells me that I'm my own worse enemy, mentally. Tells me all the time to stop being so critical. It puts doubt and insecurities in my actions to a point that I don't do the things I know I'm supposed to do. And when I don't get things done, my anxiety goes through the roof. This is a vicious mental cycle I deal with and this video has helped me realize what I'm doing to myself is destructive.
It's unhealthy to always doubt your abilities as a employee, a friend, an artist, a lover, a father and most of all a human being. Don't do it to yourself.
I just woke up from a dream where I was back in school and we were supposed to work on an art project. And I was one of the people pushed off to the side by the teacher meaning I wasn't allowed to participate. I know this sounds like a stupid dream but I woke up thinking "even in my dreams I'm not good enough."
So I really needed this, thank you.
"Crafting believable things out of nothing..." how awesome is that?!!!!
We get good at whatever we do/think (repetition). If someone thinks that they are insecure and they repeat that (in their head)for days, weeks,months and years they will eventually become that person because the brain will accept that feeling as part of the person (personality)
I've been struggling with an exceptional amount of issues lately, but one thing I learnt when you're too hard on yourself but still want to get better. Is think of someone you love and care about, think about what they'd say to you in your head with their voice. Everytime I feel terrible, I try to think of my best friend telling me that I'm doing my best and that it's okay to feel terrible. It just lightens the pain a little, but it works for me.
I really appreciate your videos, I'm a music producer and even though our industries are very different in what we create we still struggle with the same problems when it comes down to creativity. I always try to implement your ideas and way of thinking into my industrie.
I was on a really bad mind set this past day's, feeling lost and depressed with my art. Some day's ago I received my first commission, I didn't think I did a good job, even do my commissioner was very grateful. I really was feeling like my art is dog shit.
This video got recommended for me, it actually hit me really hard. I would have never thought that I was my worst transgressor, every "bad comment" of my work wasn't actually from the people that saw it, it was from my own insecurities.
I really don't have self-compassion, but really hurt's how myself backstabbed my mind.
Sorry for the venting Haha... andd the broken English.
But yeah, it's a great video :) thank you for sharing this feelings and pieces of your mind, keep the good work. ❤
21:12 dang my shoulders relaxed like the hadn't in a while. powerful words!
"Art connects us to the world around us"
That one struck me. I spend so long telling myself I'm not good enough, that it turned into "you don't belong in the world" or "there's no place for someone like you"... basically I convinced myself that I didn't deserve to connect to the world around me. I shut myself in my room, tried to be as unobtrusive as I possibly could.
I was that kid that had temper tantrums, screaming and crying because I didn't know how to deal with the overwhelming world around me. It came out as anger and frustration when I didn't have the words or the capability to understand what the issue was. I couldn't verbalise it, only making me more frustrated and overwhelmed and then I'd just cry and scream more, sometimes even starting to throw things. And I got send to my room for that. Got told I could come back when I calmed down. It sounds not too bad right? But what I ultimately learned and took away from that was: "You don't deserve love when you are like that. When you are overwhelmed and don't know what to do anymore. Go be alone through that. We don't want to deal with you when you are like that. You are annoying, you are exhausting, you are making too much trouble."
For the longest time I didn't see anything wrong with that either. because it worked right? I got over my temper, i became a super gentle calm and collected child, right? so that was all fine, right?
It took a year of therapy and my therapist looking at me going "That was kind of harsh though, withholding love.", for me to even question that. To this day I don't really know how to be angry anymore. Outwardly that is. I only know how to direct all of that inside.
I learned I was on my own and that my feelings were a nuissance to others. I became that caretaker friend that always put everyone elses needs above my own. In a room full of people, making sure they were feeling okay and not bothered by anything became my responsability. I put up a wall around myself to keep that monster that I thought I was contained and everyone else safe.
But at the same time, as an artist and as a human really, I want nothing more than that connection. I love people, the things humans are capable of, the compassion and empathy they can have for one another, to work together and bring everyone up. The magnificent creations that can become a reality when great minds work together. But it always felt like something I didn't deserve to be a part of. Still does. I am having this epiphany as I write this so..I don't know where this'll take me. But at least now I am aware.
I stagnated with my art for years. Nothing helped to get my skill higher, to make what I put on the canvas anything but a failure to my eyes.
Now I realise I might've shut myself out.
If art is connection, Then I cut it off a long time ago. Because being connected to the world would mean potentially getting overwhelmed in an environment I don't control. And that'd mean I could potentially be annoying to the people around me. I just hope I can repair this bridge somehow. Maybe that'll let me progress and mend that relationship.
It is truly fascinating how brutally art can hold up the mirror for oneself. Making it paifully obvious that there is something that needs to be addressed. It's so much more than just simply putting lines on a paper the right way.
Thank you Adam for helping me see that connection.
Really. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Adam, its videos like this that help me with my depression. I've actually tried to hang myself but I guess the cord couldn't wrap around my neck. I guess I'll stick on this world a bit longer and I'll keep drawing.
Mecha-Art If you’re feeling that low you might want to check with your doctor to see if you’re having an episode of major depressive illness. I’ve had several of them, and it is truly an illness. You don’t realize it while you’re in the middle of it though. It can last any length of time. Please take care of yourself.
Hey. Don't do it. I believe in you
Hope you're doing alright, friend. Keep fighting. I've got my own struggles, fighting with you ♡
Please don't do it, I've been there. You aren't alone.
I took a deep breath when I heard “There’s not a damn thing wrong with you.” The thing that hit me was the what you said about how we create things that didn’t even exist before. It reminded me of my drawings I did based off songs. I did them because I felt something and saw something while listening to a song, and I wanted to bring it to reality. And I did that. I want to cry lmao, I needed this so bad, thank you so much
This video is such a work of art. I wish more youtubers would exist that spoke so deep about this. THIS is something I REALLY, sincerely, needed to hear. I can't believe someone put it in words. This is amazing and thank you so much for posting.
This video made me cry a little. It wasn't just the mushrooms. The things you were talking about made me see the picture differently. They're looking up at something, I like the way the little one is peeking over the shoulder of the big one, they both see the same thing. The fact that they're monsters enhances the significance of the gesture. I'm going to try to stop being so hard on myself.
"am I someone who likes to make dolls at home"
I, who was watching this video while taking a short break from a weekend of making art dolls at home as part of my art school thesis project, actually did a double-take. Was not expecting that to be mentioned!
I cried hearing your words. I grew up beeing depressed. Your words opend my heard and all the pain came out that I totally stopped expressing myself. Thank you soo mutch.
well I dont draw but I program and am pretty hard on my self, and I come here just to listen and get over those feelings sometimes or make it worse. it happens
I couldn't of stumbled upon this video at a better time. I've been beating myself up a lot lately for feeling like I'm not good enough, and not knowing if ill ever be. Not knowing if my art will ever improve. Hell not knowing if ill ever improve in general. When you said "be compassionate with yourself". I broke down in tears. I've been dealing with the same thing all my life. I grew up feeling like a failure (being told that by my family didn't do me any favors) when in reality my mind has just always been structured differently than others. All my shortcomings in life I've always put on myself. Failed relationships, losing loved ones, etc..
I've been struggling with burdens for a while, and I know others feel the same.
I'm ready to let it all go. I'm ready to forgive myself and learn to be nicer to me.
Thank you Adam.
Just the title alone made me already teared up. But listening to it made me actually cried. Plus that soft voice, the way how you spoke feels like you're here beside me, telling me these things and patting me on the back. My mind has been in constant chaos lately, so anxious about my art and the way things are pacing lately but the way you speak and how you convey them to us, calm my agitated nerves. Thank you so much for this. I needed this today. I'm so glad I stumbled across this video.
How are you thinking what i'm thinking
I'm scared... no. I'm happy. Thank you I've always thought analysing myself all the time was a flaw, the root of all the negativity in my life. But now I look up to you, a person with this quality. I love every single topic. Every single piece. Thank you for existing. We need more people that have this kind of mentality.
Thank you Adam. I really needed that reminder.
This not just helped my art but my life too. I am always called lazy or worthless to the point I start questioning myself and blaming myself and everything, to the point I see myself as one. Thanks for this video, It shed some light not just on art but also on life. I should keep improving both art and life. It may be hard in action than in words but I'll reach to that level someday.
crying my eyes out. i needed this. thanks.
Bringing a tear to my eye, as always. Thank you Adam!
The most beautifiul explination of art... " a professional human being, a professional observer of life." Amazing words, thank you.
God damn, here I am sifting through art tutorials and now stumbling on a talk that I could have used for years. I appreciate this.
From one artist to another, Thank you Adam
I am SO GRATEFUL to have found this channel and to you for sharing this type of message! Just what I needed right now.
We've all got this! 💖
Your voice is so soothing and your words are so kind and wholesome I'm so happy to have stumbled across you. Thank you for these kinds of videos
Thank you so much for uploading this video, you don't know how much this means to me 💕
I can't begin to express how badly I needed this today -- more than I even realized until I listened. Thank you so much