1. Generally, husbands ask the wife to make a good relationship with the sister. Please do not destroy the relationship with your spouse due to relatives and other people. Live in a separate and nearby house than your parents if you need to 2. Saas/Sasur and Maa Baap are different. They have their own great place in life but please do not consider them as same and equal. Our behaviours cannot be the same with both 3. Similarly Beti and Bahu are different
My husband build house but because of my sister in law's influence I was asked to shift to rented house with my two babies! My mother in law stays in three storey bungalow alone. I live with children in 2BHK While husband works abroad.Some people are pure evil.
If a lady wants to be happy in life, she must be self dependent, always work on self improvement and overall growth in life. This way she has very less relationship troubles in parents house and in-laws house and she eventually gets respect from both the houses. Shifting focus from small small relationship problems (expectations and hurt) to continuously working towards improving overall quality of life is the key. There may be times initially when you are misunderstood but worry not, soon others will start respecting you. No-one messes with you and you get everything in life from money, health, good relationships and a peaceful mind.
Sir mere pas ek beti do bete he Tino bachche videsh me settelled he Mere pas tun prooerty he jo me tino ko dugi Par shart te he beti bete tino muze same ammount kharacha bheje Beti ko apna huq chahiye to use jimmedari bhi leni hogi Seva bhi karni padegi esa nahi hona chahiye ki seva to bahu aur beta kare aur nanad sirf huq jatane aa jaye Abhi abhi big b amitabh ne apni beti ko bunglow diya to usi time bete ko bhi de dete ek bunglow Beta bahu to sath rahe seva kare fir marne ke bad milega to ye galat he
@@nishrinvaghjipurwala4061 Mam apko zabardasti sewa karake kyu unko pareshan karna hai, jab bhi aisa time aye jab physically apko unki zarurat ho wo aa jayenge ap hi ke to bache hain. Apke pas property h ya source of income hai to ap apna kharcha khud hi bear kar sakte ho, kisi ka ehsaan kyu Lena hai. Apni passive income pehle khud par lagao, ache se jiyo, care taker or house helps rakho, ghumo firo. Jo baccha apko zyada time de or apke zyada kaam aye use ap apni taraf se expensive gifts ya gold de diya karo unko acha lagega. Remember Jo bacha apke liye present rehta hai wo zyada emotional hone ki vaje se aisa karta hai use koi laalach nahi h. Koi or bacha shayad itna emotional na ho or uski busy life ho. Beti ho ya beta ap hi ka hai, unko judge mat karo, or unka haq barabar rakho.
Hi Simran...you are right but a little problem is here... when a women don't engage on petty issues of family and focus own her own life improvements and career development thn most of the time husband became insecure... why?..because when the wife focus on herself, her career, her self development etc she definitely rise to a point where she gain respect from others but because of it her husband becomes insignificant in front her achievements which most mon can't tolarate... men actually love when his wife mind and engage his own families issues and even quarrels.... I see it through my personal experience.
Sisters only we can break this joint family cycle, study hard get a job and have enough to get your house. This does not mean you don’t respect your in-laws, this means you have respect for yourself.
Saving money is not the only reason to stay with parents. Many sons spend more money( than rent) to be with parents due to 1.under society pressure 2. To be declared good son n brother
Ekdum sahi kaha. A son does bot get respect in society if he separates himself from his parental house. And also many a times itself parents does not allow their son to live in another premises, even if it is next door apartment.
I live with my parents and it's super expensive. My nephew (2) stays with them hence net expenses are more. Plus I have a nepali wife she just knows to spend and spend and spend cos all of her cousins are married to foreign nepali and I can't match their expenses. Over all my net saving is 0. I can't even buy a god dam playstation 5
Meri nanad ke saas sasur nahi hain .. They celebrate nearly all festivals with us . She has a big family in sasural but hardly meets her brother in laws or their families. But my FIL and Mil dont ever say any thing . सारे नियम क़ानून दूसरों की बेटियों के लिए होते हैं ।
Some parents dnt let do der sons job.... Kyu ki... Agar ladka jayda kama lega... Tho parents se paise kaise mange ga... Son n dil ko daba k rakhne ko ek humare neighborhood mai hi... Dey dint let there son get job wen he was young.... Saying ki tuje kya jarurat hai paiso ki... Wen he aged usko acha job nahi mila... N bauth late uski shadi ki gaon ki ladki se..ki woh ladki ghar k Sare kaam karegi... Now that man don't have enough money.... He is having 2 kids... Now he have to depend on his parents... Dis toxic Indian parents r😢😢
Sau baat ki ek baat. Rishta wohi sahi hai jo khushi de, shanti de. warna..... Har kand ke peechhe kaam, krodh, moh, lobh, aur ahankar hai.... Aur jaha ye saare aa gaye use situation or relation me satark ho jaaye.... Thodi doori banani jaroori hai.
In my opinion, it’s emotional insecurity that comes in the way of drawing boundaries. Sometimes parents are manipulative and keep playing favourites to exhibit control, which ruins all relationships. If they make both children independent in every way, a lot of issues will be resolved. 😊
It is not always due to financial problems.. This happens.. It also happens when nanand is over possessive about her brother ..she doesn't consider her bhabhi as a family..
She always thinks bhabhi is outsider. Bhabhi also takes the whole responsibility of family in a financial way that too taking care of house..but she is still outsider for her
@@archanashinde1764it is a problem in India that bahu has rights in property acquired by husbands parents. She should only have right on her husband’s income.
Very well said.,sir. But please put some light on interference by bahu's parents,sisters brothers and relatives. These days boy's parents are staying away but girls' parents live with their daughter. Also one scene you have missed is when nanad is young and unmarried,then what should be the approach of parents.
Kdva h but true h … I am one who have four nanad and this video changed my whole process of thinking thanks sir it’s really needed for me and such women who like me
Sometimes money is not the problem but if son share his thought of having his own personal house next to them even that klesh happens .Very next day Mil will call her all relatives " Bahu nay mera beta cheen liya , kush to jadu tona kiya hai bahu nay .Like every bahu is having special kala jadu classes
Its the practical reality. ..well explained .Bahu is also a daughter of her parents. ....and same thing applies to her as daughter when she visits her parents home
Great insights! Still, most parents don't consider giving property to daughters. They pretend they don't know. If they think daughters have in-laws' property then why there is a need for property from the maternal home? In such a case how to convey and convince the daughter's parents? This is such a crucial topic to discuss
Why are most of your example with the assumption that the daughter in law is a non working dependent lady. Even when she is contributing her 50% along with husband , living separately abroad, the Nanand can influence her parents to hate the DIL by sowing the seeds of jealously and insecurity. She will be called names like extremely independent, beta chor, family breaker etc. Parents always trust the daughter no matter how close the DIL is with the in laws. The Nanand always has a benefit of doubt and upper hand with parents!
My mom has thrown me under bus and treats daughter in law as daughter. I lost job and only earning member of the family but no help from mother or brother even though she is investing crores of money for him while I am begging for job. Even though I haven't fought for anything 😢
@@swatishukla5184 Thankyou, but unfortunately she is way more smarter than me. Both parents have already transferred everything in his name. He and his wife too have quietly brainwashed them, while I have been struggling with trying to make my family survive.
I mistakenly assumed parent love is rightfully obtained. But we need to play political games , not be genuine with our feelings and put up fake drama to win them throughout life. Parents too can be manipulated for material gains, and that too without doing any hardwork and only drama. I am too late to understand things.
Sir i m also a nanad i m separated with my husband due to his extra marital affair but in my case my bhabi used to copy me which is very annoying she’s doing competition with me even i m not saying anything i m living my life with all hustles😞
Same...meri cousin sister ki bhabhi bhi usko copy krti thi...😂😂😂 same nail paint...same kapse...meri mausa mausi ko 10 saal se ek roti tk bna k ni di...abb meri cousin London chli gyi h after marriage....abb bhi vo koi kaam ni krti
Its the first time i am disagreeing with him. Nanand is not here for holidays. She is here to fulfill her duties as a daughter. Baitho papa ke sath, ma ke sath. Take them for walks, medical checkups, visit relatives. Be a good daughter. Dont expect your mom to make gulab Jamun for hours and break her back. Dont leave your children on your bhabhi to feed, clean entertain your kids 24x7. What does holiday mean? Room mei baith ke mobile chalana? Be considerate. And why does he expect bahu to take care of all guests. I have seen bahus spending hours in the kitchen and cleaning after because of these "guests". I think the son should help her out in cleaning chores afterwards atleast.
Sir good morning, really u r great the way of conversation between saas n sister in law . Very nice, after 21year of my lofe i now understand tht mother in law is saas not my mother. But anyway i feel if i do good thn god is there. But sir very nice explaintion. 💯💯💯
Super.....meri bhi bhabhi ka muh phool jata h mere mayeke jane se jbki maine aj tk usko kuchh nhi glt bola ..bahen to apna hisaa bhai k liye chhod deti h fir bhi bhabhi 1glass pani tk nhi deti nanad ko..
Agar bahen bhai ke liye mayeke mein hissa chor rahi hai to yeh koi sacrifice nahin hai. agar mayeke mein hissa lena hai to apne sasural wale mein se bhai ko hissa de.
Indian men want to live with their parents in the same house. One reason is money, another major reason is that they do not want their wife to be the boss of the house
Parents ne ladke bahu k chkkr me Apni beti ko mayke aane se mna kar diya Na vaar na tyohar Bcoz bahu ne shart rkhi k pehle apni beti ka mayka khatam kro tab apke bete ka ghr basaungi Bina kisi galti k maa baap ne sab khatam kr diya Shukar hai self depend hu Sasuraal vale ache hain Otherwise mayke valo ne to aisa haal kr diya tha... Ab insaniyat se bharosa utth gya hai Jab apne maa baap aisa or skte hain to ..... Par chalo sabar hai Bhgwan apne aap dekhega Jisne jaisa b kiya Or humare sasural me alag hisab hai Beti ko beto se jyada hissa diya gya hai Uske baccho ko humare baccho se jyada Or bola gya hai k beti sbse upar hai....
Sir, please make a 20 hour course on this and teach this as a course in all Tier-1 MBA colleges in India. If you want I will help you get connected. MBA colleges help people succeed professionally. But if people are not happy in their personal life’s, they will never do well professionally. Hence, this should be introduced as a core course along with Accounts, Finance, Statistics etc.
Even if someone can afford living separately, still they cant if parents emotionally manipulate him and take it as a ego thing that how can u move out... Iska kya kare Ps : In all ur videos u make it sound easy if u have money,... It sounds like gf leaves u, have more money.. Parents problem have more money, any other problem have more money... But in reality even if u have more money and have the choice to be independent ... There are other psychological and emotional things which takes place and impact ur mental health And if it was so easy with money then why only rich ppl with depression and anxiety are there with therapist, counsellors etc.
Exactly move out kr b gye na to mobile hai uspe maa behen sab rote hai ki haaye alag ho gya to beta cheen liya maa budhi ho gyi dyan nhi de rha joru ka ghulaam blah blah to udr I feel if husband mature hai to kahega bhai mummy tere paas daddy hai to main b to ek hee hu iske liye main b akela chor du to kaise chalega
@@neha_art_craft true but I think they aren't resilient enough mentally as well...middle class bandaa ya Garib admi apna fate samjke will accept biggest of tragedies but idr choti choti baat pe therapist speed dial pe hota hai ...padosi ne volume badaya anxiety hota h call therapist...kutta bimar h ghar me depression ayega inko call therapist .....koi scene dekhke trigger hue call therapist ....kisi ne comment paas kia call therapist k bhai muje trigger kr dia ...so yeah mentally resilient nhi hote that's countable too
The job of money, is to provide the options. It's the person to decide which option to choose. If there's no money, there are no options. As simple as that.
Jo brother financially weak hai khud per confidence nhi hai parents ki godh mein baith ker rule krna chahte hai wo apni bahano ki respect nhi ker paate. Bahan agar bimar bhi hoti hai to equality ko kayam rakhne ke liye bhai bol deta hai meri wife bhi bimar hai wo kaam nhi ker sakti is tarah se pura ka pura ek pariwar barbaad ho chuka hai.
Sometimes Nanad is villian because she takes care of father/mother/ parents and son and daughter inlaw wants their property only so waiting them to go from this world asap
बदलते परिवेश में सोच बदलने की जरूरत है जिस तरह ताली एक हाथ से नहीं बजती उसी तरह रिश्ते भी एक तरफा नहीं चल सकते l अगर उसे परिवार कहते हो उसे बनाए रखने की ज़िम्मेदारी सब की बनती है l क्लेश से अच्छा है दूरी पर रहो कम से कम रिश्ता बना रहेगा l
Jaise hi parents daughters ke liye equal property rights declare krte hai verbally bhabhi ke gharwalo ke wahan se farmaan aa jata hai older age mein maa baap ko phir daughter hi dekhe chaahe uska ghar base ya ujar jaaye. Childhood se 50 50 gender equality parents agar bolte hai to bhaiya log puri ki puri responsibilities gusse mein aaker bahano per thop deti hai sir.
Depends bhabhi kaisi hai aur bhai kaisa hai, maine 50-50 divison hote dekha hai and kisi ne object nahi kara But jo log ache nahi hain woh achank se ache nahi ho jayenge, aise logon se dur raho bas, jiss din in se dur jao,uske baad kabhi contact mat rakhna Sab ko budha hote hi, bhai-behen sab yaad aa jate hain, acknowledge hi mat karo
You have the option of going to court aur apka bhai bura mat maniye ga dande ki bhasha samjhne wala hi lagta hai, he seems far too arrogant and egoistic
What if a married girl with two kids is working in mayka(exact same location, govt job) and with a long distance relationship husband. If she get 2 days holiday then she always go with husband and come back. In mayka she is doing 90% of household chores (of whole family) and her own(with kids) all expenses by her salary. But if she asked her parents and brother to arrange a rented house in nearby city. They asked to not to live anywhere else. If she have to live separately her husband should be live with her otherwise they don't allow her to live on rent.because ye unki ijjat ka sawal h.but husband refused to live there because he is that sanskari boy of family who can't left their parents and bhai bhabhi. Her bhai bhabi always mentally, emotionally torture her and parents asked her to live accordingly. They always taunted but can't arrange a rented house. Beause if they does so unke ghar k kam kon karega.Everyone has taken her for granted.
Ma'am jitna jaldi ho ske aap alag ho jao Bcoz ye sab aane vale time me apka Aisa haal bna dega K aap kahoge meri life k itne saal barbaad ho gye.... Apka surname dekh kar lgta hai aap Haryana se to nahi ??? Jitna marji kar lo Mayk vale aapko hmesha for granted lenge Na apki nokri ki koi ehmiyat hai Na apke baccho ki Vo nokar jaisa behave krenge humsha Apni bete bahu ki timardaari krwake Ek din laat maar denge Kisi par trust na krna Na maa baap par hi Sab moh rkhte hain ladke ka Ladkiyaan jitni marji self depend ho jayein Vo humseha neeche hi rahegi Bahu anpadh hai to bhi kahenge unki gulami kro Or anpadah in the sense Gaali de to bhi sun lo
Sir apki bato me 2 bate non practical lagi 1-agar ladke ki bahen apne ghar aake janbuz kar bhabhi ko oareshan kar rahi ya faltu ke drame kr rhi hai idhar ki udhar kar rhi hai to wo sabse pehle apne bhai ka accha nahi chahati she is a really bad person 2- agar jis ghar me baap ki nahi chalti pehle to baap ni or second agar baap ko pta hai ki yeh meri ladki yaha aake thoda overreact karti hai to usse apne ladke or bahu jo unhe khana de rhi hai dwai de rhi unka khayal rakh rahi uska oadh lena chahiye or day one par apni ladki ko confront krna chahiye ki beta yeh acchi baat nahi agar esha karogi to yaha jada ane zarurat nahi hai kyoki budhape me ladka or uski bahu khana pina deta hai take care karta hai na ki wo ladki wo 7 day ko aati h or faktu bak bak karke chali jati h jisme uski mummy uska sath deti hain kyoki women are emotional creatures to wo apni ladki ka path lengi baki male jo hota hai usse practical hoke decision lena chahiye to lead his house I can talk about this or zada but aaj ke liye itna hi
Sir.. Kitne saral aur sidhe sabdo me itni badi baat samjha di aapne... Kash ki logo ko samjh aaye....... Exactly middle class me hota bhi kuch aisa hi hai..........
Ghar pe haq hai bhai manaa nhi h aao khaao so jaao aake dono maa beti gossip kro full day par ye jo jhagde lagwa deti hain aake isse aitraaz hai ...apne maa bhai ko sikhana k kaise dabaake rkhna hai kaise bail k jaise jotna hai gang up aake krti hain baat idr kharab hoti hai
@@N7_YES alag leke rhe barobar hai idr husband b agree karna chahiye na ....usko maa baap suvidha hote hue b pese dete nhi hai .....aajke time me khud ka ghar lena is no joke yar....3 3 bache paida krke Beth jaate hai fir kuch help b nhi krni torture b krne hai aur betiya inko damad k sath ghar bithaani hai to bahu ko kya hee sukh milega ...I've went thru hell bcoz sister in laws jab gar aake baith jaati hain na uske husband k sath aur husband b gunga to idr SAS sasur k role h bhai alag kro aur jeene do
Very true but incomplete Separate live temporary solution hai. Problem based on mindset Improve mindset n give some guidance about family member role boundaries
Mam, when you are in a toxic environment, it becomes difficult to improve your mindset. Therefore, sir suggests to first cut that cord (live separate) and then work on improving your mindset, result will be fast and best. Why one should crib and have grudges for others? Live your own life the way you want and never complain or have grudges for others. This state of mind reflects in relationships also and you are in good terms with others all the time.
@@shwetabhardwaj4066 yes mam you are right and I admit everybody should know his/her limitations. Your thought process is good but also needs a little bit of reconditioning and perspective from others persons point of view. And I admit that some Nanads go beyond their limitations but still how we want our life to be is always in our hands.
Insanely truth ! Shocking that missed this out episode and It ruined !! Itna sach that already suffer karne k bad apne maa baap k gjarme ... Kaise lesson nahi milti ha pata nahi. What steps need to take to prevent beautiful relationship!
Money doesn't matter sir in my case my husband do' nt want to leave my in laws.he is very caring and loving for my in laws.he is very obedient person towards his family
Sir need one video on topic where in-laws want to shift with the couple - they are old and alone and son wants them to shift in new city - how to maintain dynamics and privacy issues
Excellent video sir Mere yahaan dono example hain meri sister in-law or chacha sasur ki beti ka dono ne abhi tak mayke m cantrol kar rakha hai but sabke karmo ka apna hisab hoga
No .never adopt if u can hav ur own healthy kid. If u want to do social work than u can sponsor a child..which is better than adopting bcz emotional damage is there
in my sasural.... my nanand stays...as she is living near by. N we had disputs . i said my husband to stay separate. But he is not agree with this. and pressurized to stay with them. my husband says..I am only the son n icant leave my parents alone. But in my in laws house.. dominance of my mother in law n sister in law. N she stays as her own house.
Meri nand to mere ghar se 10 minute ki duri pe rheti hai,meri saas har din puri ghar ki story btane jati hai,meri nanad ko sab pta hota hai, fir wo aake puchti hai kaun aya tha ye kyu kiya 😂
In a known case to me, Parents kept something for themselves and fixed some X assets for sharing among brother and sister. X was devided by two and then from daughters share they deducted the marriage expenses as on date and gave it to the son, who actually spent on that marriage.
My husband made a house for parents with all his money. Sasur ji ne apne beto ke paise leker apne naam pe ghar banwa diye hai. Aur mera Husband wahan jake rehne ko bolta hai kyuki uska paisa laga hai. But i dont want to stay there. Kyuki woh hi hum pe hamesha financial burder daalte hai.
1. Generally, husbands ask the wife to make a good relationship with the sister. Please do not destroy the relationship with your spouse due to relatives and other people. Live in a separate and nearby house than your parents if you need to
2. Saas/Sasur and Maa Baap are different. They have their own great place in life but please do not consider them as same and equal. Our behaviours cannot be the same with both
3. Similarly Beti and Bahu are different
My husband build house but because of my sister in law's influence I was asked to shift to rented house with my two babies! My mother in law stays in three storey bungalow alone. I live with children in 2BHK While husband works abroad.Some people are pure evil.
Very good move or decision. Let your mother leave alone .
2BHK me Shanti hai na?
Aapke pati ko aapne nahi uski maa ne Paula hai....usko izzat do pehle
Pyar khud se mil jayega
Very good decision 😂
Mere yaha bhi same huwa hai
If a lady wants to be happy in life, she must be self dependent, always work on self improvement and overall growth in life. This way she has very less relationship troubles in parents house and in-laws house and she eventually gets respect from both the houses. Shifting focus from small small relationship problems (expectations and hurt) to continuously working towards improving overall quality of life is the key. There may be times initially when you are misunderstood but worry not, soon others will start respecting you. No-one messes with you and you get everything in life from money, health, good relationships and a peaceful mind.
Sir mere pas ek beti do bete he
Tino bachche videsh me settelled he
Mere pas tun prooerty he jo me tino ko dugi
Par shart te he beti bete tino muze same ammount kharacha bheje
Beti ko apna huq chahiye to use jimmedari bhi leni hogi
Seva bhi karni padegi esa nahi hona chahiye ki seva to bahu aur beta kare aur nanad sirf huq jatane aa jaye
Abhi abhi big b amitabh ne apni beti ko bunglow diya to usi time bete ko bhi de dete ek bunglow
Beta bahu to sath rahe seva kare fir marne ke bad milega to ye galat he
@@nishrinvaghjipurwala4061 Mam apko zabardasti sewa karake kyu unko pareshan karna hai, jab bhi aisa time aye jab physically apko unki zarurat ho wo aa jayenge ap hi ke to bache hain. Apke pas property h ya source of income hai to ap apna kharcha khud hi bear kar sakte ho, kisi ka ehsaan kyu Lena hai. Apni passive income pehle khud par lagao, ache se jiyo, care taker or house helps rakho, ghumo firo. Jo baccha apko zyada time de or apke zyada kaam aye use ap apni taraf se expensive gifts ya gold de diya karo unko acha lagega. Remember Jo bacha apke liye present rehta hai wo zyada emotional hone ki vaje se aisa karta hai use koi laalach nahi h. Koi or bacha shayad itna emotional na ho or uski busy life ho. Beti ho ya beta ap hi ka hai, unko judge mat karo, or unka haq barabar rakho.
Agar aap apnay sabhi bacho ko equal property ma hissa datay ha roo sab ko jimadari bhi equal uthani padagee
That’s good 👍🏻 advice
Hi Simran...you are right but a little problem is here... when a women don't engage on petty issues of family and focus own her own life improvements and career development thn most of the time husband became insecure... why?..because when the wife focus on herself, her career, her self development etc she definitely rise to a point where she gain respect from others but because of it her husband becomes insignificant in front her achievements which most mon can't tolarate... men actually love when his wife mind and engage his own families issues and even quarrels.... I see it through my personal experience.
Best thing ye h ki jb bhi nand festivals pr aaye vacation pr aaye tb bahu bhi apne ghr me jaye festivals, vacation celebrate krne very simple
What a Idea
Mind blowing 🤣🤣
Sisters only we can break this joint family cycle, study hard get a job and have enough to get your house. This does not mean you don’t respect your in-laws, this means you have respect for yourself.
Saving money is not the only reason to stay with parents. Many sons spend more money( than rent) to be with parents due to
1.under society pressure
2. To be declared good son n brother
Ekdum sahi kaha. A son does bot get respect in society if he separates himself from his parental house. And also many a times itself parents does not allow their son to live in another premises, even if it is next door apartment.
I live with my parents and it's super expensive. My nephew (2) stays with them hence net expenses are more. Plus I have a nepali wife she just knows to spend and spend and spend cos all of her cousins are married to foreign nepali and I can't match their expenses. Over all my net saving is 0. I can't even buy a god dam playstation 5
@@sstalks469 sad
Meri nanad ke saas sasur nahi hain .. They celebrate nearly all festivals with us . She has a big family in sasural but hardly meets her brother in laws or their families. But my FIL and Mil dont ever say any thing . सारे नियम क़ानून दूसरों की बेटियों के लिए होते हैं ।
Some parents dnt let do der sons job.... Kyu ki... Agar ladka jayda kama lega... Tho parents se paise kaise mange ga... Son n dil ko daba k rakhne ko ek humare neighborhood mai hi... Dey dint let there son get job wen he was young.... Saying ki tuje kya jarurat hai paiso ki... Wen he aged usko acha job nahi mila... N bauth late uski shadi ki gaon ki ladki se..ki woh ladki ghar k Sare kaam karegi...
Now that man don't have enough money.... He is having 2 kids... Now he have to depend on his parents...
Dis toxic Indian parents r😢😢
Sau baat ki ek baat. Rishta wohi sahi hai jo khushi de, shanti de. warna..... Har kand ke peechhe kaam, krodh, moh, lobh, aur ahankar hai.... Aur jaha ye saare aa gaye use situation or relation me satark ho jaaye.... Thodi doori banani jaroori hai.
In my opinion, it’s emotional insecurity that comes in the way of drawing boundaries. Sometimes parents are manipulative and keep playing favourites to exhibit control, which ruins all relationships. If they make both children independent in every way, a lot of issues will be resolved. 😊
Very true! Manipulative parents... and they love to play favoritism! Pure narcissists!
Parents are always manipulative
Not always
True
@@seemakaushik7815 u r lucky, rare. Bhai behno ka apas ka jhagda hi maa baap ki wajah se hota hai
Husband and wife should have their independent house,bhale hi wo chhota ho
This type Duniya Dari ka knowledge actually useful for our Generation
You deserve nobel prize for such type of awareness
It is not always due to financial problems.. This happens.. It also happens when nanand is over possessive about her brother ..she doesn't consider her bhabhi as a family..
She always thinks bhabhi is outsider. Bhabhi also takes the whole responsibility of family in a financial way that too taking care of house..but she is still outsider for her
@@archanashinde1764it is a problem in India that bahu has rights in property acquired by husbands parents. She should only have right on her husband’s income.
Same
My story
Very well said.,sir. But please put some light on interference by bahu's parents,sisters brothers and relatives. These days boy's parents are staying away but girls' parents live with their daughter. Also one scene you have missed is when nanad is young and unmarried,then what should be the approach of parents.
Kdva h but true h … I am one who have four nanad and this video changed my whole process of thinking thanks sir it’s really needed for me and such women who like me
Sometimes money is not the problem but if son share his thought of having his own personal house next to them even that klesh happens .Very next day Mil will call her all relatives " Bahu nay mera beta cheen liya , kush to jadu tona kiya hai bahu nay .Like every bahu is having special kala jadu classes
Even sister in laws are jealous of Bhabi status sometimes
And they deliberately create problems even if everything is going smooth
Right.. ..
Maine dekha hai bahu log jealous krti hai...nanad se.
Very true
Its the practical reality. ..well explained
.Bahu is also a daughter of her parents. ....and same thing applies to her as daughter when she visits her parents home
Great insights!
Still, most parents don't consider giving property to daughters. They pretend they don't know. If they think daughters have in-laws' property then why there is a need for property from the maternal home? In such a case how to convey and convince the daughter's parents? This is such a crucial topic to discuss
If daughter can take the property of her parents, she should also be ready to take responsibility of her old parents!
Ys exactly
Exactly@@hemagupta5943
@@hemagupta5943 that we daughters always do. Put insight on what I asked. Not your gyan
@@hemagupta5943it is quite common to see bhabhi calling nanand to come take care of sick in laws . But property is for bhabhi
Why are most of your example with the assumption that the daughter in law is a non working dependent lady. Even when she is contributing her 50% along with husband , living separately abroad, the Nanand can influence her parents to hate the DIL by sowing the seeds of jealously and insecurity. She will be called names like extremely independent, beta chor, family breaker etc. Parents always trust the daughter no matter how close the DIL is with the in laws. The Nanand always has a benefit of doubt and upper hand with parents!
I wish everyone parents understand this ❤
My mom has thrown me under bus and treats daughter in law as daughter. I lost job and only earning member of the family but no help from mother or brother even though she is investing crores of money for him while I am begging for job. Even though I haven't fought for anything 😢
Same sister pr sabko bahu sahi lgte hai 😢
@radha consider talking to advocate
Typical Indian mother 😂😂😂 yeh hain humari tyag ki murat
@@swatishukla5184 Thankyou, but unfortunately she is way more smarter than me. Both parents have already transferred everything in his name. He and his wife too have quietly brainwashed them, while I have been struggling with trying to make my family survive.
I mistakenly assumed parent love is rightfully obtained. But we need to play political games , not be genuine with our feelings and put up fake drama to win them throughout life. Parents too can be manipulated for material gains, and that too without doing any hardwork and only drama. I am too late to understand things.
Woowww...such a great knowledge for our society🎉😊Amazing❤🎉
Sir i m also a nanad i m separated with my husband due to his extra marital affair but in my case my bhabi used to copy me which is very annoying she’s doing competition with me even i m not saying anything i m living my life with all hustles😞
Same...meri cousin sister ki bhabhi bhi usko copy krti thi...😂😂😂 same nail paint...same kapse...meri mausa mausi ko 10 saal se ek roti tk bna k ni di...abb meri cousin London chli gyi h after marriage....abb bhi vo koi kaam ni krti
I am also suffering this problem.
Same my bhabhi is bad chudail me kuch ni bolti toh bhi pareshan karti hai
Its the first time i am disagreeing with him.
Nanand is not here for holidays. She is here to fulfill her duties as a daughter. Baitho papa ke sath, ma ke sath. Take them for walks, medical checkups, visit relatives. Be a good daughter. Dont expect your mom to make gulab Jamun for hours and break her back. Dont leave your children on your bhabhi to feed, clean entertain your kids 24x7. What does holiday mean? Room mei baith ke mobile chalana? Be considerate.
And why does he expect bahu to take care of all guests. I have seen bahus spending hours in the kitchen and cleaning after because of these "guests". I think the son should help her out in cleaning chores afterwards atleast.
Your comments are very logical otherwise yaha sabhi aurat khud ko victim hi dikha rahi hain
Excellent advice sir, being independent is this only solution to these problems
Sir ur recent webinar on will was very effective and in shirt time got lot of insights ...great work
Sir good morning, really u r great the way of conversation between saas n sister in law . Very nice, after 21year of my lofe i now understand tht mother in law is saas not my mother. But anyway i feel if i do good thn god is there. But sir very nice explaintion. 💯💯💯
My real sister life was ruined by her sister in law and mother in law, now she is all alone 😢
Super.....meri bhi bhabhi ka muh phool jata h mere mayeke jane se jbki maine aj tk usko kuchh nhi glt bola ..bahen to apna hisaa bhai k liye chhod deti h fir bhi bhabhi 1glass pani tk nhi deti nanad ko..
Agar bahen bhai ke liye mayeke mein hissa chor rahi hai to yeh koi sacrifice nahin hai. agar mayeke mein hissa lena hai to apne sasural wale mein se bhai ko hissa de.
Indian men want to live with their parents in the same house. One reason is money, another major reason is that they do not want their wife to be the boss of the house
Aapki vajah se life mein goals sahi directions mein aa paaye hain. Abb samajh aata hai separate real estate ka value
Beautiful analysis sir god bless you
Amazing uncle ji.. serious topic PE bhi hasa dete ho aapa.. aapi ki sari videos dekhti hu mai.. maaza aa jata hai..
Excellently explained..
🙏🏻Thanks a lot for bringing up this topic .. Its so relatable and true🙏🏻
Well said Guru ji. I have two nanand and when they come our home they can't say anything but in in-laws house they display lot of nakhare 😂
Parents ne ladke bahu k chkkr me
Apni beti ko mayke aane se mna kar diya
Na vaar na tyohar
Bcoz bahu ne shart rkhi k pehle apni beti ka mayka khatam kro tab apke bete ka ghr basaungi
Bina kisi galti k maa baap ne sab khatam kr diya
Shukar hai self depend hu
Sasuraal vale ache hain
Otherwise mayke valo ne to aisa haal kr diya tha...
Ab insaniyat se bharosa utth gya hai
Jab apne maa baap aisa or skte hain to .....
Par chalo sabar hai
Bhgwan apne aap dekhega
Jisne jaisa b kiya
Or humare sasural me alag hisab hai
Beti ko beto se jyada hissa diya gya hai
Uske baccho ko humare baccho se jyada
Or bola gya hai k beti sbse upar hai....
4:54 is epic 😅
🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
Sir, please make a 20 hour course on this and teach this as a course in all Tier-1 MBA colleges in India. If you want I will help you get connected. MBA colleges help people succeed professionally. But if people are not happy in their personal life’s, they will never do well professionally. Hence, this should be introduced as a core course along with Accounts, Finance, Statistics etc.
Even if someone can afford living separately, still they cant if parents emotionally manipulate him and take it as a ego thing that how can u move out... Iska kya kare
Ps : In all ur videos u make it sound easy if u have money,... It sounds like gf leaves u, have more money.. Parents problem have more money, any other problem have more money... But in reality even if u have more money and have the choice to be independent ... There are other psychological and emotional things which takes place and impact ur mental health
And if it was so easy with money then why only rich ppl with depression and anxiety are there with therapist, counsellors etc.
Exactly move out kr b gye na to mobile hai uspe maa behen sab rote hai ki haaye alag ho gya to beta cheen liya maa budhi ho gyi dyan nhi de rha joru ka ghulaam blah blah to udr I feel if husband mature hai to kahega bhai mummy tere paas daddy hai to main b to ek hee hu iske liye main b akela chor du to kaise chalega
Because only the rich can afford counselor and therapists 😂
@@neha_art_craft true but I think they aren't resilient enough mentally as well...middle class bandaa ya Garib admi apna fate samjke will accept biggest of tragedies but idr choti choti baat pe therapist speed dial pe hota hai ...padosi ne volume badaya anxiety hota h call therapist...kutta bimar h ghar me depression ayega inko call therapist .....koi scene dekhke trigger hue call therapist ....kisi ne comment paas kia call therapist k bhai muje trigger kr dia ...so yeah mentally resilient nhi hote that's countable too
@@neha_art_craft yes but my point is they also don't have it easy, if other things are not sorted.
The job of money, is to provide the options. It's the person to decide which option to choose. If there's no money, there are no options. As simple as that.
Excellent video very practicle like all your videos 🙏 superb
Very honestly said
Awesome 👍
Action nd consequences its like u have experienced all this by yourself really enjoyed the concept make more
Daughter have equal rights in Father property. If Brother have problem he take another house for her wife.
Daughter ko uska property rights de do O alag rah ke parents ka care karegi
Jo brother financially weak hai khud per confidence nhi hai parents ki godh mein baith ker rule krna chahte hai wo apni bahano ki respect nhi ker paate. Bahan agar bimar bhi hoti hai to equality ko kayam rakhne ke liye bhai bol deta hai meri wife bhi bimar hai wo kaam nhi ker sakti is tarah se pura ka pura ek pariwar barbaad ho chuka hai.
Sir has has ke rona aya video bahot achha laga aapne muzhe khudko sochane pe majboor kiya hai thank you so much sir 🙏🙏pranaam🙏🙏
Ye uncle ne sahi market pakda hai, housewives ka.... inke concept me Housewives k inlaws ko curropt dikhana hai. Good job uncle.
Socially no one takes blame not son no wife no daughter in law but lot of frustration at home
Sometimes Nanad is villian because she takes care of father/mother/ parents and son and daughter inlaw wants their property only so waiting them to go from this world asap
My sister in law is the head of the family in my in law family, she visits here more than 8 months in a year , she is too much pampered and spoiled….
बदलते परिवेश में सोच बदलने की जरूरत है जिस तरह ताली एक हाथ से नहीं बजती उसी तरह रिश्ते भी एक तरफा नहीं चल सकते l
अगर उसे परिवार कहते हो उसे बनाए रखने की ज़िम्मेदारी सब की बनती है l
क्लेश से अच्छा है दूरी पर रहो कम से कम रिश्ता बना रहेगा l
Jaise hi parents daughters ke liye equal property rights declare krte hai verbally bhabhi ke gharwalo ke wahan se farmaan aa jata hai older age mein maa baap ko phir daughter hi dekhe chaahe uska ghar base ya ujar jaaye. Childhood se 50 50 gender equality parents agar bolte hai to bhaiya log puri ki puri responsibilities gusse mein aaker bahano per thop deti hai sir.
Depends bhabhi kaisi hai aur bhai kaisa hai, maine 50-50 divison hote dekha hai and kisi ne object nahi kara
But jo log ache nahi hain woh achank se ache nahi ho jayenge, aise logon se dur raho bas, jiss din in se dur jao,uske baad kabhi contact mat rakhna
Sab ko budha hote hi, bhai-behen sab yaad aa jate hain, acknowledge hi mat karo
You have the option of going to court aur apka bhai bura mat maniye ga dande ki bhasha samjhne wala hi lagta hai, he seems far too arrogant and egoistic
Bahut sahi gyaandiya h guruji.❤🎉
Thank you so much amitji
What if a married girl with two kids is working in mayka(exact same location, govt job) and with a long distance relationship husband. If she get 2 days holiday then she always go with husband and come back. In mayka she is doing 90% of household chores (of whole family) and her own(with kids) all expenses by her salary. But if she asked her parents and brother to arrange a rented house in nearby city. They asked to not to live anywhere else. If she have to live separately her husband should be live with her otherwise they don't allow her to live on rent.because ye unki ijjat ka sawal h.but husband refused to live there because he is that sanskari boy of family who can't left their parents and bhai bhabhi. Her bhai bhabi always mentally, emotionally torture her and parents asked her to live accordingly. They always taunted but can't arrange a rented house. Beause if they does so unke ghar k kam kon karega.Everyone has taken her for granted.
Just focus on urself.... Use ur hard earn money on u n kids..... Move out... N ask husband to stay with u or come for holidays at ur house...
Have patience. When children grow up a little you can move out . This may take 10 years, but 10 years is not a lot in 80 years lifetime
Ma'am jitna jaldi ho ske aap alag ho jao
Bcoz ye sab aane vale time me apka Aisa haal bna dega
K aap kahoge meri life k itne saal barbaad ho gye....
Apka surname dekh kar lgta hai aap Haryana se to nahi ???
Jitna marji kar lo
Mayk vale aapko hmesha for granted lenge
Na apki nokri ki koi ehmiyat hai
Na apke baccho ki
Vo nokar jaisa behave krenge humsha
Apni bete bahu ki timardaari krwake
Ek din laat maar denge
Kisi par trust na krna
Na maa baap par hi
Sab moh rkhte hain ladke ka
Ladkiyaan jitni marji self depend ho jayein
Vo humseha neeche hi rahegi
Bahu anpadh hai to bhi kahenge unki gulami kro
Or anpadah in the sense
Gaali de to bhi sun lo
Be strong and move out
U r the most clarity giver person of India
Best video we need more of this
Kya Baat hain. So TRUE n so clear
😊 very true, the first one. Her husband will say- din ko raat if she says so.
Sir apki bato me 2 bate non practical lagi 1-agar ladke ki bahen apne ghar aake janbuz kar bhabhi ko oareshan kar rahi ya faltu ke drame kr rhi hai idhar ki udhar kar rhi hai to wo sabse pehle apne bhai ka accha nahi chahati she is a really bad person
2- agar jis ghar me baap ki nahi chalti pehle to baap ni or second agar baap ko pta hai ki yeh meri ladki yaha aake thoda overreact karti hai to usse apne ladke or bahu jo unhe khana de rhi hai dwai de rhi unka khayal rakh rahi uska oadh lena chahiye or day one par apni ladki ko confront krna chahiye ki beta yeh acchi baat nahi agar esha karogi to yaha jada ane zarurat nahi hai kyoki budhape me ladka or uski bahu khana pina deta hai take care karta hai na ki wo ladki wo 7 day ko aati h or faktu bak bak karke chali jati h jisme uski mummy uska sath deti hain kyoki women are emotional creatures to wo apni ladki ka path lengi baki male jo hota hai usse practical hoke decision lena chahiye to lead his house
I can talk about this or zada but aaj ke liye itna hi
Sir.. Kitne saral aur sidhe sabdo me itni badi baat samjha di aapne... Kash ki logo ko samjh aaye....... Exactly middle class me hota bhi kuch aisa hi hai..........
Parenta kay ghr pe haq bhai bhen dono ka hai 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Personal life mei ni
Ghar pe haq hai bhai manaa nhi h aao khaao so jaao aake dono maa beti gossip kro full day par ye jo jhagde lagwa deti hain aake isse aitraaz hai ...apne maa bhai ko sikhana k kaise dabaake rkhna hai kaise bail k jaise jotna hai gang up aake krti hain baat idr kharab hoti hai
@@arjuntyagi5860 Bhai main property ki baat kr rha hoon.
Parents ko bhai bhen dono ko brabar hissa dena chahaiyea bhai bhen ko bina bhedbhaav kiye..
@@varshajogriya Iska solution ek hi hai ghr agr parents ka hai or kisi ko uss ghr ki beti say dikkat hai to wo apna alag lekrrhe..
@@N7_YES alag leke rhe barobar hai idr husband b agree karna chahiye na ....usko maa baap suvidha hote hue b pese dete nhi hai .....aajke time me khud ka ghar lena is no joke yar....3 3 bache paida krke Beth jaate hai fir kuch help b nhi krni torture b krne hai aur betiya inko damad k sath ghar bithaani hai to bahu ko kya hee sukh milega ...I've went thru hell bcoz sister in laws jab gar aake baith jaati hain na uske husband k sath aur husband b gunga to idr SAS sasur k role h bhai alag kro aur jeene do
Very true but incomplete
Separate live temporary solution hai.
Problem based on mindset
Improve mindset n give some guidance about family member role boundaries
What mindset? Boundaries form only when you start living separately, living in house of parents and also showing tantrums don't go hand in hand
Mam, when you are in a toxic environment, it becomes difficult to improve your mindset. Therefore, sir suggests to first cut that cord (live separate) and then work on improving your mindset, result will be fast and best. Why one should crib and have grudges for others? Live your own life the way you want and never complain or have grudges for others. This state of mind reflects in relationships also and you are in good terms with others all the time.
@@shwetabhardwaj4066 yes mam you are right and I admit everybody should know his/her limitations. Your thought process is good but also needs a little bit of reconditioning and perspective from others persons point of view. And I admit that some Nanads go beyond their limitations but still how we want our life to be is always in our hands.
Why seperate living temporary solution?
Sir, aap saas- bahu k rishtey ka mimicry bohut accha kiye.....so hilarious.....( and harsh truth of middle class people)
thats why me and my husband stay in abroad very far from my sil. she is pure evil but har sher ko savasher mikta hai. that savasher is me 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Dev Rani and Jethani ka case study
I have 4 sister in laws....Sara din phone pe report leti rehti hai. 😢😢
Insanely truth ! Shocking that missed this out episode and It ruined !! Itna sach that already suffer karne k bad apne maa baap k gjarme ... Kaise lesson nahi milti ha pata nahi. What steps need to take to prevent beautiful relationship!
GURUJI make a video on AI
the changes, opportunities and its effects..Indian Mindset and World view !!
No need. This not AI channel
@@LR-yj3kp Guruji is helping with all the topics...
Thn
Why avoid AI
Let's knows his insight !!!
Mind-blowing 😊👍
classic example Aishwarya Rai and Shweta Bachchan
Please make a video on unmarried or divorced brothers of husband in the family.
Nand aati hai or suddenly sb bigad jata hai
She takes every decision its their right ac😊according to family
Ekdum sahi kaha aapne sir ❤❤🙏🍫
Aise bhi baap hain singhania jaise jinhone sab bete ko de diya ...jisne unhe nikal diya
Totally agree 👍
Money doesn't matter sir in my case my husband do' nt want to leave my in laws.he is very caring and loving for my in laws.he is very obedient person towards his family
नमस्कार गुरुजी🙏
Sir need one video on topic where in-laws want to shift with the couple - they are old and alone and son wants them to shift in new city - how to maintain dynamics and privacy issues
Just keep them some where near your neighbourhood!!!
Bohot sai bataya aapne
Excellent video sir
Mere yahaan dono example hain meri sister in-law or chacha sasur ki beti ka dono ne abhi tak mayke m cantrol kar rakha hai but sabke karmo ka apna hisab hoga
Damn 2 min me hi relaqtable ho gya, the two cases are very accurate.
Very well explained ....guruji
Adoption ke bare me video banaye. Should we adopt or not?
No .never adopt if u can hav ur own healthy kid. If u want to do social work than u can sponsor a child..which is better than adopting bcz emotional damage is there
@@sweetlabradorcandy6582no problem in adopting if there is no own child. Children below 5-6 years don’t remember emotional problems
apki saari baate bilkul sahi hoti hai kash apki tarah he sab hote
Sir please tell me dulera mai invest krna kaisa hai
I liked before starting 😊
Sir,we need these v important life tips to be given to everyone before marriage it's a must! Life gets he'll with these sasural politics!
Sir numerology no 9 ka video kb aayega.. kaffi mahineo se wait kr raha hu
sir one video on spiritual awakening as well and does it painful?
in my sasural.... my nanand stays...as she is living near by.
N we had disputs .
i said my husband to stay separate. But he is not agree with this. and pressurized to stay with them.
my husband says..I am only the son n icant leave my parents alone.
But in my in laws house.. dominance of my mother in law n sister in law. N she stays as her own house.
Do you advise a mother in law sharing her gold jewelry with her only daughter in law. I asked you this question many times. Please reply
Meri nand to mere ghar se 10 minute ki duri pe rheti hai,meri saas har din puri ghar ki story btane jati hai,meri nanad ko sab pta hota hai, fir wo aake puchti hai kaun aya tha ye kyu kiya 😂
Meri dadii bhi apne beti ko sb batati hai aur unki beti enko😂
Same here 5 min distance only
In a known case to me, Parents kept something for themselves and fixed some X assets for sharing among brother and sister.
X was devided by two and then from daughters share they deducted the marriage expenses as on date and gave it to the son, who actually spent on that marriage.
Seems like a good way to divide it.
Genuine and practical parents!!!
Sahi baat hai sir.meri nanad ka b mere life me bahut involvement hai
Great topic sir ✌✌✌✌✌
Good analysis 👍
My husband made a house for parents with all his money. Sasur ji ne apne beto ke paise leker apne naam pe ghar banwa diye hai. Aur mera
Husband wahan jake rehne ko bolta hai kyuki uska paisa laga hai. But i dont want to stay there. Kyuki woh hi hum pe hamesha financial burder daalte hai.
What abt that nanand who stays abroad and is still not liked by bhabhi
Very nice sir ji. Beti padhao- Beti ko maalkin banaao.