The Four Reasons Why Some People Lack Friends and Familial Relationships | Insights from a Monk
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- čas přidán 13. 05. 2024
- Ever wondered why some individuals seem to lack meaningful connections in both friendships and familial bonds? In this insightful video, a venerable monk sheds light on the four underlying reasons behind this phenomenon. From societal complexities to inner clarity, each reason offers a profound perspective on human relationships.
Join us as we delve into the intricacies of human nature, exploring why some may prefer solitude over socializing and why others struggle to navigate the complexities of interpersonal dynamics. Through anecdotes and wisdom from the ages, we uncover the essence of true connection and the importance of inner peace.
Whether you're seeking to understand your own social circles better or simply intrigued by the intricacies of human behavior, this video offers valuable insights that resonate with all of us. Watch now and embark on a journey of self-discovery and understanding. Affiliate link:
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Sometimes your family are abusers. Sometimes you get sick and friends don’t stick around. Sometimes solitude is a safe place. You don’t have to have a “simple” mind to feel that way.
You’re absolutely right. Family and friends can sometimes let us down, and solitude can indeed be a safe and restorative place. It’s important to recognize and honor our own needs for peace and safety. Thank you for sharing this perspective.
Amen 💯
Absolutely! Better to be alone that badly accompanied ❤ And sometimes being alone is wonderful and peaceful. It doesn’t have to mean lonely
The harsh truth - exactly 💯
So very true, my thoughts exactly @MichelleLWhitney
Nothing worse then to be alone in a room filled with narcissists and abusers and takers. Pets, dogs and kitties are the best friends you will ever have. 💖
Amen ❤️🐈🐈😺
I completely agree. Pets offer unconditional love and companionship that many people fail to provide. They truly become our best friends and loyal companions. 💖
Jesus Christ is our Best Friend and we should be His best friends. God the Father Created animals, so beautiful. We can thank Him and ask Him for the Grace to love people. To learn how to do .think..speak..behave when we are troubled...at least troubled concerning narcissists.
@Snezanah agreed. So thankful God created these furbabies.
@@mstanley97 yeah, only I forgot to write this too: to pray for repentance for people who abuse. So also to pray for the conversion for the people who did not converted YET. To ask God for the conversion for this world. Look...God wants us that we pray. (If we don't do that, we say that we can manage everything without God Who Created all things seen and unseen),so...we do our best and God does the rest. We do what we can do including prayer ofcourse. And what we can't or we can not know , God knows everything and He do the rest. Jesus wants to work together. (Vassula Rydèn True Life In God where Jesus Speaks and God the Father and our Mother Mary and Even the Holy Spirit Who is a Person)Jesus is not someone Who was in this world and not watch us anymore. He is Truth...Love and He is always the same. He did not stop giving signs to humanity (Medjugorje Mary ..Queen of Peace apperitions..last week again her image in the sky)see otherwise CZcams...a lots of conversions there a lots of Graces upon humans. She invites us all to come there. So we need to pray for that these abusers who are also there in Bosnia ..that they repent to pray for these killers and for the ones who abuse in another way towards the animals. I know things from there and it's a burden to me for almost six years now. But we need to pray.
I hate to say it, but as you get older you start to grow weary of people. People are complicated and fickle even if they act lighthearted. Sometimes it just isn’t worth the effort especially if you have a job and hobbies.
It's understandable to feel weary of people as we get older, especially when we've experienced the complexities and fickleness of human interactions. Balancing work, hobbies, and relationships can indeed be challenging, and sometimes it's necessary to prioritize our own well-being and interests. While maintaining connections can require effort, it's also important to find a balance that works for us individually. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
I agree . . . I would rather be alone than deal with other people's drama .
I can’t stand coughing when people don’t have anything wrong with their throat. I never do it but it’s constant nowadays. I don’t understand it. It’s unnerving and really off putting. Coughing and the word “mate” when I’ve never. Talked to you in my life.
I find people to be simple and predictable. You all view the world differently
@@soulbasedliving You are a person too 😂😂😂😂
People have shown me that they cannot be trusted. That no matter how much one give them, how much one does for them, how much one may love them, they'll still betray. I have no family. I have acquaintances, but not friends. And in moments when I feel lonely, I'm reminded that I'm still in the best of company: mine. Why? Because I'm not afraid to be alone. I'm afraid to be alone with someone else, and that already happened. It's why I'm divorced.
I'm sorry to hear about your experiences, but it's commendable that you find strength in your own company. Trust can be a difficult thing to rebuild once it's been broken, and it's understandable to feel wary after being hurt. Being comfortable with yourself and valuing your own company is a powerful place to be. I hope you continue to find peace and fulfillment, whether through new connections or your own endeavors. Thank you for sharing your story.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom You’re welcome. It’s not easy. It can be difficult more so due to how people view me like I’m damaged or I am the problem. That is farthest from the truth. Putting one’s self first instead of others will always cause a rift because it’s the ultimate toxic and arrogant ultimatum. We’re placed in that position day in and day out sometimes without realizing it. But when it is realized and it brought to the person’s attention be prepared to be shunned. Disagreements and or arguments present an opportunity to learn a person’s true nature and character. And if the person’s reaction is to become defensive, projective, or combative because one is speaking up for one’s self, then you know what kind of person you’re dealing with. Don’t get me wrong I don’t believe in shunning someone after the first argument. But, it also depends on the argument.
I have and do find comfort in successfully achieving endeavors. For example, I purchased my own condo by myself with my own $$$. It is such a rewarding feeling to know I did this. It’s evidence that not only I, but we all have the power to do things on our own. Unfortunately, we are conditioned to believe the opposite . That we can’t do anything on our own. That’s not true.
Thank you again. Your words mean a lot to me. ❤❤❤
Well said ❤️🩹
Thank u for that! The only one u can truly count on is yourself.
maybe not betray, but rather reciprocate. and I dont mean in a equal way when it comes to $$$, but rather reciprocate in other meaningful ways that creates balance and harmony.
I am retired, and alone....and I like it...I have freedom. Yes, I was married had 2 children, they grew up, moved out, got their own family. Husband died...left just me and 2 cats. I have never meddled in my children's married lives...not my business. I have always been an independent soul, and still am.....not relying or expecting anyone to look after me etc. I get up, go to bed when I want to....the tv remote is all mine (lol), seldom cook large meals anymore, less house clean up, less laundry etc. , go where I want when I want....do what I want. Vacations ? No problem, I can handle myself in situations...afraid to travel alone ? Not really. I prefer the mountain areas and have known my way around since a kid. Friends ? A few...but very selective. Don't put up with the "poor pitiful me" type, or the always "help me" type. Yes, I do help people, just not to the point it is expected. Am I rich ? Ha, that's a joke. I have what I need, etc. and my fur babies are spoiled...we're good. Do I have any advice to give ? Just a little. Always have a plan B, in case plan A fails. Keep your eyes open, as well as your mind. Be careful who you trust...don't be afraid to ask questions. Think before you speak in anger...you cannot take words back once spoken. Trust in God, pray or speak to Him often...and remember to be thankful. Don't have anything to be thankful for ? Look around you...yes you do.
Well said
Your perspective is both inspiring and insightful. It's wonderful to hear that you've found contentment and independence in your life. Your advice is wise and practical, and it’s clear that you've cultivated a fulfilling lifestyle. Thank you for sharing your journey and your wisdom. It’s a reminder to all of us to appreciate what we have, stay prepared, and keep a positive outlook.
Same here ❤️
Keep it up, stay safe!❤👍🙏
❤
Being alone is a gift from god... Attachment is the root for all suffering....
Embracing solitude can indeed be a gift, allowing us to find peace within ourselves and appreciate the simplicity of life. And you're right, attachment often leads to suffering, as it ties our happiness to external factors that are beyond our control. Learning to let go of attachments can bring a sense of freedom and inner peace.
I am 60.. through lifes nasty experiences, both family and friends have decieved , hurt and damaged our relationships.. i will remain true to myself and my inner voice.. and am completely able to entertain, educate and research the world on my own...
It sounds like you've had your share of challenges in navigating relationships, but it's inspiring to see how you've remained true to yourself despite those difficulties. Embracing your independence and ability to explore the world on your own terms is a testament to your resilience and strength. Sometimes, the most profound growth comes from facing life's trials with authenticity and self-reliance. Keep listening to your inner voice and following your path with confidence.
My inner circle is not really a circle but a dot.😇🥰🙏
I love that analogy! Sometimes, a small and tight-knit inner circle, or even just a dot, can be the most meaningful and fulfilling. Quality over quantity always. 😊🥰🙏
In life, one must learn to be independent. True friends are like diamonds precious and rare , friends are like autumn leaves found everywhere.
Very True
I agree with you. I decide to ghost all my friends because i cant trust them, i have no issue with them, it just i feel i cant trust them because of their past behvior toward me in college.
Absolutely, independence is key in life. True friends are indeed rare and precious, like diamonds. It's important to cherish those genuine connections while also being self-reliant. Thanks for sharing this beautiful analogy!
@@HanzIzaak-io6cu Absolutely resonate. There are many people out there you can mingle with but the true ones are very few. Real test comes when you are not doing well and even the one who shows goodwill and good to you turn the back against you. I had a coursemate who shared with me her good friend looked down on her when she was not doing well in her career. For me I throw away a lot of toxic friends.
I love being alone. It's my freedom & peace. No one will take that from me 🥰❤️🙏🏽 so grateful every day
Having a very few friends and spending time alone are the result of maturity. Estrangement from family is usually the result of a deep understanding of the dysfunction that many families experience. These are not just Buddhist ideas but ones of an awakening person from every walk of life. Completeness comes from within not THROUGH family or friends.
Agreed. Not all families are healthy in fact many are narcissistic and abusive. It is unwise and foolish to remain within an unhealthy family system to the detriment of one's own physical, mental and emotional well-being, "just for the sake of family". People who insist everyone should stick to their family of origin their whole lives even if it's damaging must be living in a bubble.
Absolutely, finding contentment and fulfillment within oneself is a mark of maturity and self-awareness. While relationships with friends and family can be enriching, they are not the sole source of happiness or fulfillment. Recognizing and understanding the dynamics within families, as well as the importance of healthy boundaries and self-reliance, are indeed signs of awakening and personal growth. Ultimately, true completeness comes from cultivating inner peace, wisdom, and self-love, independent of external relationships.
Sometimes you have no friends or family because they are all dead.
You can always make new friends. There still are people around us.
Not if you’ve lost everyone, being confined to house due to age, chronic illness.
@@Cristine-mb4frIt's not easy, l know. I have five autoimmune diseases and living on my own. I enjoy talking to people on social media. At least there is interaction with others.
@@Cristine-mb4fr I love you. 🙏❤️🦋
@@karynempath3337💕
Its safer to have less people around you. Most just want you around for what they can gain physically from you. But when opportunities arise they think will benefit them, they will show their true colors.
It's true that having fewer people around can sometimes feel safer, especially if you've experienced betrayal or insincerity. It's important to surround yourself with people who genuinely care for you and value you for who you are, not just for what they can gain. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Stay cautious, but also open to the possibility of finding genuine connections.
To have friends in this society you have to be like others and be agreeable and can’t be perceived to have more than them. People become envious easily , they don’t like people with their own minds, it’s really just too much work. I have 0 friends and not close to my family. I would like , like minded friends but they are hard to identify. I have been backstabbed multiple times for no reason. And although I can show up for others at difficult times, it’s not reciprocated so at this time I just stay to myself. My own parents betrayed me.
I'm sorry to hear you've had such tough experiences. It sounds like you've faced a lot of challenges with trust and finding genuine connections. It's important to protect your peace and surround yourself with those who truly value and respect you. Take care of yourself and keep hope alive for finding like-minded, supportive people.
Sadly, I can relate to this.
How did your parents betray you?
Exactly. Same here
I am less aggravated not being around people.
I can understand that. Sometimes, solitude can be very calming and help reduce stress. Thank you for sharing your experience.
Friends only get close to attempt to betray or steal your identity. I have zero friends and mostly aquaintances. People are selfish even “good” people.
Don't blame them. This existence is predatory by nature and design. One organism must eat or exploit another to survive. Although humans have evolved to form complex social bonds, in the end it's your existence that matter most. The "sacrifice" or "caring more for others than yourself" have never been strong survival traits as the "selfish" trait. Once I realized this and the nature of the world, I have never blame someone for being selfish or greedy. They are just a product of the system. Asking them to be otherwise, would be making them override their programming. It would be a tough demand on anyone.
I'm sorry to hear that you've had such negative experiences. It's understandable to feel wary given those circumstances. It's important to remember that while some people may act selfishly, there are still genuine individuals out there who value trust and friendship. Don't lose hope, and focus on surrounding yourself with those who truly appreciate you for who you are.
I agree with wonder woman most people only call u when they want something or will only help u if there is something in it for them many r covert narcissists imo
Sometimes (sadly, more often than most of us are prepared for) when you need them, your "friends" & "family" prove themselves to be anything but ......
Secretly, some of them positively relish seeing you struggle, suffer, fall, or fail.
That's a painful reality for many. It's disappointing when those you thought you could rely on show their true colors in tough times. It can be a hard lesson, but it often leads to valuing your own strength and finding support in unexpected places.
@hellas_crater I can relate. Don't worry about those who secretly relish seeing you suffer...some day they will be treated exactly the same way by other people because karma is no respecter of persons...what goes around comes around. It may take years but it does happen. Two people who went out of their way to harm me in the past when I didn't do anything wrong to them met an unfortunate fate less than 10 years after my bad experience with them. And throughout those 10 years I'd put the incidents behind me and rarely thought of them. Next thing I knew - baam! I heard something had happened to them. So forgive people who hurt you and move on to better things in life. So to quote someone "All you have to do is live your best life and let the Universe do the rest,"😊😊😊
Best part of this video is the comments section ❤
❤❤❤
To avoid disappointment. Simple.
Get a dog . Give a shelter dog a home if you can . You will be assured of unconditional love and loyalty. Try finding that with a human .
Getting a dog can indeed bring so much joy and companionship into your life. Shelter dogs, especially, have so much love to give and can become loyal companions for life. While human relationships may sometimes come with complexities, the love and loyalty of a canine friend are often unconditional. It's a beautiful way to enrich your life and theirs. 🐾❤️
@@BuddhaZenWishdom Quite right . Both my dogs are rescued dogs . One is a Springer Spaniel. The other is a Labrador/Cockapoo cross . We are inseparable companions.
Rescue cats will do the same.
Exactly! I do believe that may be what I came here to find out. I will no longer eat animals, either. They have my utmost respect.
Some people long for deep connections, they hate superficiality and it's really hard to find depth in people.
Indeed, deep connections can be profoundly fulfilling, offering a sense of understanding, empathy, and shared values. However, in a world that often values surface-level interactions and instant gratification, finding individuals who appreciate depth and authenticity can be challenging. It may require patience and discernment to identify those who are capable of engaging in meaningful conversations and fostering genuine connections. Building such relationships often involves vulnerability, mutual respect, and a willingness to invest time and effort into getting to know each other on a deeper level. While it may take time to find these connections, they can ultimately be incredibly rewarding.
Grandma here, I have 5 sisters & 2 brothers, my sisters married & enjoy life & holidays with there Inlaws!
middle brother is always looking for a handout, I don't invite him.
Older brother is Awesome, we talk & text & meet for breakfast/lunch.
I only see my family at funerals. I keep busy with my kids & grandkids.
I Don't have friends, I have Acquaintance's! I have no regrets & my life is I want it to be!!
Thank you for sharing your experience, Grandma. It's great to hear that you have a close relationship with your older brother and stay busy with your kids and grandkids. It's important to create the life you want and find contentment in your own way. Your perspective is inspiring, and it sounds like you have a fulfilling life. No regrets, just living it the way you want! 😊
I used to be actively socialising , loved helping people and making friends. Here where I live both foreigners who were here living for a while or long and many locals find that the people around are very transactional in the way they treat others . I had many times put in effort to keep in touch with people but they are not interested. After much observation and unpleasant encounters with discussion with some people we find that they are only interested to get what they want from you and after that throw you away and stand firm to ignore you even you contact them to keep in touch. Since then I just stop making new friends and contacting these heartless people. So much peace I have after I stopped doing what I did before. I only make friends with people who are interested to keep the friendship, genuine, caring, kind, mature, understanding and helpful.
" transactional". So true.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s tough when people only have transactional intentions, but it sounds like you’ve found peace by focusing on genuine, caring relationships. It’s important to surround yourself with those who truly value and respect you. Your approach to friendship is inspiring and a reminder to prioritize quality over quantity.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom Thank you.
Your comment is so true….and your decisions wise and protecting your heart.
@@wildlifegardenssydney7492 Thanks. Hope you take care of yourself while making friends. Good luck.
When you replace what you want with what you need, your life naturally balances out. Yes, I do have friends and I can be very social when I am high energy. But when I get drained by people around me and work, I need time for myself. This looks like sleeping more, walking in the nature, focusing on hobbies. The real ones get it, the other ones - could not care less. I noticed that majority people reach out only when they need something from you. Very few show a genuine interest without any hidden motive. Also, I do not gossip - that automatically takes away excitement from interactions as people can see from my face when I am not really interested listening about it nor I have something to add on to fuel further drama/chaos. Life gets way more peaceful and enjoyable when you remove all the noise around you.
Your perspective is very insightful. It's essential to balance our needs with social interactions and take time for ourselves when we feel drained. Genuine connections are rare and precious, and it's wise to distance oneself from superficial or drama-filled interactions. Prioritizing peace and self-care can truly lead to a more fulfilling life. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
Growing up you see the ugliness of people that you do not see as a child. Constant disappointments can cause you to become emotionally distant and numb.
It's true that as we grow older, we often become more aware of the complexities and imperfections in people and relationships. Experiencing disappointments and hurt can indeed lead to emotional distance and numbness as a way to protect ourselves from further pain. It's important to acknowledge and validate those feelings while also seeking support and healthy coping mechanisms to navigate them. Sometimes, therapy or talking to trusted friends or family members can help in processing these emotions and finding ways to reconnect with others in a healthier way. Remember, it's okay to take the time you need to heal and prioritize your emotional well-being.
Nothing is permanent even friends will leave us when the grow up and starts their family with responsibilities.But for me I've been myself since young and even family ties we hardly get together.But that's life.
Same and I'm ok with that. 2 good friends. Have acquaintances & family visits a couple times a year. Just fine. Do many things alone & I always show up.
You’re right, life is full of changes and nothing is permanent. It’s important to find peace and contentment within yourself, as you’ve done. Family and friends may come and go, but our own resilience and inner strength are what truly sustain us. Thanks for sharing your perspective.
When people hurt you too much, you have to rely on yourself...but we all need each other so try to trust others with caution but not cut people off too much...🙏🏾
That's a wise perspective. While it's important to protect yourself from hurtful situations, completely cutting yourself off from others can lead to isolation. Finding a balance between trusting others cautiously and maintaining healthy boundaries is key. It's okay to take time to heal and protect yourself, but staying open to meaningful connections can also enrich your life. Building relationships based on mutual trust and respect can provide support and companionship through life's challenges.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom thank you ❤️🙏🏾
The "path is narrow"therefore their only space for "one"
That’s a profound thought. Sometimes the journey we take is indeed a solitary one, allowing us to grow and understand ourselves better. Thank you for sharing this insight.
😂😂😂😂
My family isn't worthy. My dog is. I don't like the city. I don't like being around people. I live in the forest... And I'm just fine.
It takes awhile to figure out if someone actually cares about you or they’re just looking for attention.
Absolutely, it often takes time to discern genuine care from those seeking attention. Trust and true connections develop gradually. Thanks for sharing your insight!
I have ZERO friends anymore i have been single for 3 years… i don’t speak to anyone in my family either… i speak to my children and my grandkids!!! that is it.
It sounds like you have a close and loving relationship with your children and grandkids, and that's really special. Sometimes, focusing on those who truly matter and bring joy to our lives is what’s most important. Keep cherishing those connections!
I was able to get through Covid isolation in peace and happiness whereas people I know who need a crowd of people around them did not. Being strong and independent has its reward.
That's wonderful to hear! Your strength and independence truly shone during a difficult time. It's a testament to your resilience and ability to find peace within yourself. Thank you for sharing your experience; it can inspire others to cultivate inner strength and independence. Stay positive and keep thriving!
65 and diagnosed with autism in 1966. People and family stress me, so being alone reduces my tension. It’s logical that loners don’t have people in their lives because we want or need to be alone. And when people try to fix us, God help them. We will destroy your feelings if you try to fix us. Fixers are troublemakers.
It sounds like you've had a challenging journey, especially with the added stress of feeling misunderstood by others. It's important for people to respect your need for solitude and understand that being alone can be a source of comfort and relief for some individuals. It's unfortunate when others try to "fix" or change us without understanding our unique perspectives and needs. Everyone deserves to be accepted and respected for who they are, including their preferences for solitude or social interaction. If you ever feel overwhelmed or unsupported, reaching out to a therapist or support group who understands your experiences with autism may be beneficial. Remember, you deserve understanding and validation for your feelings and experiences.
Also. There is a generational linke to CEN. Acronym for childhood emotionally neglect. Parent did not teach the child how to be connected. There are many other dysfunctional families where these traits where not instilled. Also. Narcissistic family parents abandoned the child and grow up in adulthood like this. Get mental health counseling. Find these topics on here. Many Drs sharing this issue on CZcams.
It's important to recognize the impact of childhood emotional neglect (CEN) and dysfunctional family dynamics on an individual's development. These experiences can significantly influence how we form connections and navigate relationships in adulthood. Seeking mental health counseling and exploring resources on platforms like CZcams can be valuable steps towards understanding and healing from these challenges. Thank you for shedding light on this important topic and encouraging others to seek support.
I like to be alone that's why
👍👍👍
It’s safer that way. Have been too trusting, and have been defrauded too many times. Trust is gone, therefore it’s safer to be alone. If you don’t agree, shove off!
Me too, people are getting crazier by the minute. Who needs all that drama. 💯
@@angelameyer3709 I'm loner stay to myself. Sometimes I help people which is rarely but anytime I do come in contact with those I help they do something Negative like back stab or steal something.
So I just keep my distance, people aren't what they use to be. 💯
I am completely alone. No children, No husband, live remote on 100s of acres, so hardly any neighbors and the ones I have do not socialize. I've owned my home for 23 years, completely debt free, and for the first time in my life I just met my neighbor next to me. We share a property line. Extremely weird. Sat down with a Trust Attorney to make out a living trust and now I have to find an Heir. That is so weird too. I haven't been able to finish the paperwork because of it. Haven't met anyone worthy enough in my eyes all that I have to give.
It sounds like you're navigating a unique and solitary lifestyle. Living remotely with minimal social interaction can indeed present challenges, especially when it comes to important decisions like planning for the future. It's understandable that finding a suitable heir for your living trust might feel daunting, especially if you haven't encountered someone you feel comfortable entrusting with your assets. Take your time with the decision-making process, and perhaps consider seeking advice from trusted professionals or exploring alternative options for estate planning. Ultimately, it's important to find a solution that aligns with your values and priorities.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
You don't have to find an Individual to leave your money to, it could be a worthy charity or cause.
If you die without a will it will go to your relatives.
It's so much easier to be by urselfin so many ways
Absolutely, sometimes being by yourself can bring a lot of peace and simplicity. Thank you for sharing your perspective!
I love your consistently thoughtful, intelligent, kind & gentle replies to all the comments.
Thank you so much for your kind words! I strive to provide thoughtful and supportive responses. Your appreciation means a lot to me. 😊
Everything on here is AI generated, including these replies. I couldn't get past the first minute of the video, bots are taking over 😢
@@riri1718 .. I don't see anything wrong with AI on yt. . . They're better than most humans on here. 😉
@@briannab5296 fair enough. My own experience has been different, so I still very much prefer to hear and interact with humans and/or other animals on here.
@@briannab5296 otherwise I can just sign in to my ChatGPT
Being alone will not work practically at all times, especially when we sick, we tend to be dependent on some one like for hospitals formalities etc..
I have faced this in my life, makes to feel abandoned.
May be its suitable for those who wants to lonely and focus on meditation
You bring up a valid point about the practical challenges of being alone, particularly during times of illness when we may need assistance with hospital formalities and other necessities. It can indeed make one feel abandoned or vulnerable. While solitude may suit those who wish to focus on meditation or self-reflection, it's essential to recognize the importance of human connection and support, especially during difficult times. Thank you for sharing your perspective and highlighting the need for balance between solitude and social interaction.
Does the narrator sound like the voice is a computer generated Keanu Reeves to anybody else?
The buddha statue reminds me of the golden calf in the Bible Scripture.
Wish I can share this with my neighbor! She is so negative about everything that I cut off my contact with her. Life is so much happier for me. I used to listen to her sad negative stories because I felt sorry for her but no more. She needs a psychiatrist to sort out her mental problems as I no longer give her free advice!
My male neighbour, of nearly 5 years, is like this, too ! I went 'no contact' on him, 3 weeks ago. I don't trust him, anymore ! He betrayed me, twice. We had a great friendship, until then. He has relationships, but they hardly last more than a few months, because of his mental problems & negativity. He's living with a women & her 17 years old daughter. I'm not jealous of her. He means nothing to me. I just ignore him & pretend he doesn't exist. I'm having bets with myself to see how long this woman, lasts !😄. I'm happy being single. I love my life ! My life is great ! 😊👍😸🐶⛵♥️
@@alisonb5921 You did the right thing! Life is short, do not waste time on toxic relationship, platonic or otherwise. I work part time so this woman would run over and voiced her distaste for everything. Her parents and sisters did not want anything to do with her and I felt sorry for her. Stupid me! One day, I woke up and thought to myself that the woman is taking me down the rabbit hole with her!!!! Long story short, I don't even look her in the face when I see her outside and I also learn not to waste time with toxic people! Just tell them ' so sorry, I can't talk to you now' and leave!
It sounds like you made a difficult but necessary decision for your own well-being. Boundaries are important, especially when dealing with someone who consistently brings negativity into your life. While it's understandable to feel compassion for your neighbor's struggles, ultimately, prioritizing your own happiness and mental health is essential. It's okay to step back and focus on your own positivity and peace. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I had a friend who called me every day after my husband died and since I was alone, I appreciated it. But after about 2 years, I realized all we ever dud was ralk about her, or about the news. That was tough in the middle of grieving. When I asked her not to talk about the news because it added to my emotional burden, she git really huffy, and stopped calling. I felt sad abd lonely fir a bit, but I'm lucky: I have my house, my job and my kitty cat. I have a few family members, far away but we talk on the phone and visit sometimes. I'm doing pretty well and if I want to meet people I di have invites to professional organizations and clubs. So yea, I'm good. I miss my husband, that's fir sure, but I think he would support how I'm doing. Best wishes to us all!
IT'S DUE TO PEOPLE'S SELFISHNESS. 🤗
Selfishness can indeed be a big factor in why relationships don't work out. It's important to find people who value generosity and mutual respect. Thanks for sharing your thoughts! 🤗
To have patience with oneself is to have self-love. 🌹
I love being alone❤
This video was not what I was expecting, but what I was needing today!
This is just catch phrases all strung together like they are meaningful
🤍🕊️ thank you, beautiful. I cherish nature and all it’s inhabitants. Just doesn’t include toxic people.
Love that!
2. Naturally kind hearted but ignorant of wordly affairs ... simple minded. *is called out personally* 😌
It's important to recognize that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. While being naturally kind-hearted is a wonderful trait, it's also essential to be aware of the complexities of worldly affairs. Understanding both can help navigate life more effectively. Thanks for sharing your perspective!
Maybe, just maybe, a person with no friends and few family connections has brought it upon themselves.
I have a cousin who makes a point of denigrating others at every opportunity. She's a bully, a loud mouth and a sneering , condescending know-it-all. Anyone who voices a different opinion from hers will soon receive a public tongue-lashing in loud, braying tones.
And she wonders why nobody wants to associate with her, and why she's never invited to family functions.
It doesn't seem to occur to her that other people are very tired of getting their heads bitten off for the crime of having different views .Or constantly being interrupted when they're speaking. Or being told ad infinitum about all the important people she knows, and how many church services she attends.
It's a brutal fact of life that some people are just their own worst enemies.
It's unfortunate, but sometimes people don't realize how their behavior affects their relationships. It sounds like your cousin might benefit from some self-reflection. It's important for everyone to understand that respect and kindness are key to maintaining connections with others.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom I don't hold out any hope for her, I'm afraid. She's been like this for 70 years and if you dared to suggest that she try self-reflection, you'd get a toxic tirade .
I have very good friends, reliable, trustworthy and honourable. They are the chosen ones in my journey of life. I've carefully painfully skimmed and scanned my present friends. I had many others who proved that they were not worth to be called friends, they just wanted whatever they could get from me.... they wanted my money, jewellery , help but showed their true colours in the end. I've avoided those people and just kept the true friends deep in my heart ❤️
I'm very happy, living a beautiful life at 69. Thank God 😊
It's wonderful to hear that you have found true, reliable, and trustworthy friends who have become invaluable companions on your journey through life. It's unfortunate that you had to endure the pain of discovering that some individuals were not genuine friends, but it seems you have wisely chosen to distance yourself from those who showed their true colors. Cherishing the deep connections you have with your true friends is truly a blessing, and it's heartening to hear that you are living a beautiful and fulfilling life at 69. Gratitude for the genuine relationships in your life is indeed something to be thankful for. Thank you for sharing your story of resilience and happiness.
Through my life I gave generiousely to people It’s my nature to give and be sociable also the professions I choose were people focused professions I love dealing with people now I’m retired and miss peoples company I’m amazed at the level of insincerity lack of social skills lack of empathy and compassion there is in people and how shallow people are though I came from a large family I have no connection with any family member which is very painful and upsetting after many attempts to connect I’ve decided to let it go the level of betrayal upset from people who stole from me is another story it’s all taken a heavy toll on my life emotionally but these days I have decided to move past it all and take care of myself it’s difficult to be alone but I feel at peace and content I feel sad for people whom are suppose to be my family and lack any sense of awareness thank you for this very useful video
It sounds like you've had quite a journey, filled with both generosity and disappointment. It's understandable to feel saddened by the lack of connection with family members and the betrayal you've experienced from others. Taking care of yourself and finding peace and contentment in solitude is a courageous step forward. Remembering to prioritize your own well-being and finding fulfillment in your own company can be empowering. While it's natural to feel sadness for the lack of awareness in some family members, focusing on your own growth and happiness can lead to a more fulfilling life. Thank you for sharing your story.
I so value Lord Buddha's teachings. 100% true.
❤❤❤❤
more people need to see this video
Your message would get across a lot better if you didn't use AI to do your closed-captioning for you. It is riddled with errors.
Couldn't agree more on that subject! Many CC words in videos are misspelled so badly as to change the meaning into something quite comical.
I’m in my twenties but I’ve always been a hermit those who support me are more online than work family and so called friends .
It sounds like you've found a supportive community online, which can be just as valuable as support from work, family, or traditional friends. In today's digital age, many people find comfort, understanding, and connection through online communities, especially if they resonate more with the people they meet there. It's important to prioritize relationships that uplift and support you, regardless of where they originate. As long as you feel fulfilled and supported by your online connections, there's no need to feel pressured to conform to traditional social norms. What matters most is finding people who understand and appreciate you for who you are.
This is so good! Thank you 🙏❤️
You're so welcome!
I do not refere to them as family because that is a tile earned by ones character...Family- uplifts, supports, encourages, they desire what is in YOUR best interest NOT their own, and the list goes on. Also to those blood related, that doesnt make someone considered family, it makes them blood related, family is an earned title.
It sounds like you have a clear understanding of what constitutes true family in terms of character and support. Family is indeed more than just blood relations; it's about the quality of the relationships and the mutual care and respect shared between individuals. It's understandable to reserve the term "family" for those who demonstrate the qualities you mentioned - uplifting, supportive, and genuinely concerned for your well-being. Building such relationships takes time and effort, but the bond forged is invaluable.
@@BuddhaZenWishdom so far experienced non family as far as in the 3D goes 😔, been quite awful to experience/endure but has its purpose/reason. Due to the level/extent of toxicity, cutting remaining ones off/out..Best of current ability need to be a healthy tree, others depend on me to do so..will cut off the rotten fruit, ignoring what others may say/think..was neat few years ago, wind tunnel struck here exact moment that I was quite 😡 within, rhe huge tree up front here, came down, roots exposed, up out of ground..what came to mind was, uprooted Family tree 🤔. Thank you for your kindness:) Do try to have clear understandings, best am able too. Noticed others out there still feel obligated due to expressions like that is your family you have too, or you can not do that, that is your family etc..Toxicity is NOT family it is rotten fruit. And if one cuts it off tree so be it, Divine understands. And if not able to do cut off, atleast do limit interactions with such people if toxicity is involved. Nice name:) Not had buddha synchronicity in awhile until today, earlier glanced over at the neat buddha head that crossed my path at store ways back, felt to get so did, and now its in your name on here:) also stray male cat outside here, named him buddha because first time we crossed paths, he was just this big cat sitting so peacefully in the sun:) -💜-
I care not for snipers nor liars,and I value those that care from a genuine heart 😊
Reading the comments, sure seems like this video has introduced me to many like minded individuals.
Not looking for rewards, seeking a team with an stoic mindset ... ThankYou .. And, GODBLESSYOU .
It's great that you're seeking a team with a stoic mindset. Finding like-minded individuals who share your values and approach to life can be incredibly fulfilling. Best of luck in your search, and may you find the strong, supportive team you're looking for!
Friends and family if they are not loyal and quick to take sides with a narc and abuse you as my sibling has done after years of behaving like she cared that's a shocker 😢. Love animals they are so pure and loving and accepting. How do people say they love you then turn on you treat you like garbage and hate on you be alone be at peace ❤
It's truly heartbreaking to experience betrayal and mistreatment from those whom you once trusted and loved, especially when it comes from family. It's understandable that such experiences can lead one to seek solace in the companionship of animals, who offer unconditional love and acceptance. Finding peace in solitude can be a healing process, allowing you to focus on self-care and surround yourself with positivity. Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and although it may take time, healing is possible. Surround yourself with the love and support of those who genuinely care for your well-being, and take comfort in knowing that you are worthy of love and respect.
I have cut off the toxic people in my life. Yet I'm being told by strangers I have to apologize and make amends with them. My life is in danger around most of these people. I'm told I will meet new, good people. I'm still meeting a lot of toxic people.
It's commendable that you've taken steps to remove toxic individuals from your life in order to prioritize your well-being and safety. It's understandable that encountering toxic people can be disheartening, especially when you're striving to surround yourself with positivity. Remember, healing and growth take time, and meeting new, supportive individuals might require patience and persistence. Trust your instincts, continue prioritizing your safety, and remain open to forming connections with genuinely good-hearted people who uplift and support you. Your journey toward healthier relationships is a courageous one, and you deserve to be surrounded by kindness and understanding.
You must create boundaries.
They literally just called empathetic people "simple minded"
He is absolutely right
👍👍👍
I like it when I am around people, but I do not crave for it. I like to be on myself and do things by myself and enjoy nature and art and observing enjoying living organisms of every kind, but I don’t attach to that and I don’t desire to possess or control.
That sounds like a wonderful way to live, appreciating the beauty around you without feeling the need to possess or control it. Enjoying nature, art, and the company of living organisms in a detached, peaceful way can bring a lot of fulfillment. Thank you for sharing your perspective!
So true learning this one lately
WOW, I have never heard these things before, thanks for your video
Our pleasure!
@@BuddhaZenWishdom ok bro
Thankyou, for your helpful and informative video! 😊👍❤
Glad it was helpful!
Thank you for your help❤❤
Happy to help!
Rightly analysed 🎉🙏🏼
Thank you for your kind words! I'm glad you found the analysis accurate. 🎉🙏🏼
Thank you ❤
You're welcome 😊
😊 Many things r not in our hands like where, in whose home u take birth, ur upbringing, by parents. For an innocent child parents is a whole world, love,care, peace, faith. Divine is impartial. They give equal attention to all. There r 2 types of people, extrovert n introvert. Extros find easy, r easy to live bcoz nothing much affect to them or superficially. They get to normal quickly after high ups n downs in life. They r spreaded. Intros just opposite, choosy, selective, reserved. They do everything but cautiously, carefully their each n every vibes,acts, deeds, actions not to go waste for wrong people, bcoz they do everything seriously, sincerely. They need its satisfaction. 😊
You've beautifully highlighted the differences between extroverted and introverted personalities, emphasizing how upbringing and individual traits shape our outlook on life. It's true that our experiences and innate tendencies influence how we interact with the world around us. Both extroverts and introverts have their own strengths and ways of navigating life. Thank you for sharing your insightful perspective! 😊
Thank You !
You're welcome!
This is awesome video thankyou so much for making planet beaitiful ❤❤❤❤❤❤
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Im my own best friend now. I never understood what that meant until I tried it. I also learned how to say no.
REMEMBER YOU BELONG TO NO ONE AND NO ONE BELONGS TO YOU
That's a powerful reminder about personal freedom and individuality. Thanks for sharing this perspective!
thank you for sharing
❤❤❤❤
I have been a loner all my life
Before it was hard for me to fill out the employment application because they ask reference 6 friends. I dont have any friend.
At least I have my cat!!
Thank you 🙏❤
You are so welcome
I am 75, alone and grateful........God teaches one to be forgiving, grateful, and kind..........the path is more narrow than the eye of a needle..........lose the weight
It’s difficult to make friends in the neoliberal hellscape we live in.
You can say that again, lol!!
thank you
You're welcome
I think alot of us are very empathetic and it is very draining to be around people.
Absolutely, empathy can be both a blessing and a burden. While it allows us to understand and connect with others on a deeper level, it can also leave us feeling drained, especially in environments where negativity or emotional turmoil is prevalent. It's important to prioritize self-care and set boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. Taking time for yourself, engaging in activities that recharge you, and surrounding yourself with supportive and positive influences can help alleviate some of the emotional strain associated with empathy. Remember, it's okay to step back and prioritize your own mental and emotional health.
Very true 👍🏼 power to you 🌟
Thank you 🙌
I have 2 phones but no-one to call to
Yep, like being all dressed up with nowhere to go.
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. Having the tools to communicate but no one to reach out to can be lonely. It might be helpful to look for new opportunities to meet people, such as joining clubs, groups, or online communities that share your interests. Sometimes reaching out to old friends or family members can also rekindle connections. You're not alone, and there are always ways to build new relationships.
Sometimes there are big swaths of life that go different ways, often to different purposes, in one existence. I refer you to one of my favorite stories, The Miracle of Purun Bhagat, in The Second Jungle Book of Rudyard Kipling. This is the story of a man whose life has been dedicated to becoming one of the highest achievers among men, with power, influence, wealth too, but huge responsibility. As this is a story of India, the man chooses the retirement of an anonymous wandering monk who travels on foot to the mountain country of his mother's people to become a lone holy man, living in a ruined mountain shrine, where he gains many animal companions. The local villagers down the mountain bring him food, but never disturb his meditation. For many years this balance is held, until on one fateful night, he must again become the man he once was, wielding the power of his leadership among both men and animals one last time. I don't know a story that moves me more, or one that brings more truth on this matter of solitude and its reasons.
Hi & I sincerely like this channel. It isThank You calming & and have a good vibe to enjoy peace ✌️. Thanks, Miss Janine🧸🍉🌺💯🆒️♏️
What a beautiful reflection on solitude and the different paths life can take us on! Kipling's story of Purun Bhagat indeed offers profound insights into the complexities of human existence and the journey towards inner peace and fulfillment. It highlights the transformative power of solitude and the wisdom gained through introspection and connection with nature. Thank you for sharing this meaningful perspective.
Chat GP wrote this?
Buddhist leaning word salad😂
I have no real friends plus I have anxiety issues and depression also have a narcissist as a father he loves making me feel like crap , like I'm constantly walking on eggshells I don't like going around him much because he loves gaslighting , acting like he's holier than thou . He also takes my kindness for weakness .
I'm sorry to hear about the challenges you're facing with your father and the impact it's having on your mental health. Dealing with narcissistic behavior can be incredibly difficult, especially when it comes from a family member. It's important to prioritize your well-being and set boundaries to protect yourself from emotional harm.
Seeking support from a therapist or counselor who specializes in anxiety and depression could be beneficial. They can provide you with coping strategies to manage your anxiety and depression symptoms and offer guidance on navigating difficult family dynamics. Additionally, connecting with supportive communities or online forums where you can share your experiences with others who may be going through similar situations could provide comfort and validation.
Remember that you deserve to be treated with kindness and respect, and it's okay to distance yourself from toxic relationships, even if they involve family members. Taking care of your mental health is essential, and reaching out for help is a courageous step towards healing and self-care.
I rather be with a few people then feeling lonely a room full of freinds and family❤❤❤I don't envy social people give me 5 minutes with them and I identfy alot of faults of abuses and fake Ness it's a turn off for me
It sounds like you value quality over quantity when it comes to relationships, preferring genuine connections with a select few rather than superficial interactions with many. Trusting your instincts and being able to identify faults or insincerities in others can be a valuable skill, helping you to surround yourself with people who truly understand and appreciate you. Quality relationships can bring a deep sense of fulfillment and companionship, even if they are with just a few individuals. It's important to prioritize your own comfort and well-being in your relationships, and it's okay to prefer a smaller circle of trusted friends over a larger group.
Emotional Intelligence by D. Goleman
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman is indeed a fascinating topic! It's amazing how understanding emotions and managing them effectively can greatly impact our relationships and overall well-being. Thanks for bringing it up!
60/40ish of 3 & 4... I'm all about self reliance but I've learned/learnt/ learning to lean on another or two once in awhile.. allowing a loved ones help may allow said loved one to feel needed/wanted/useful/ helpful instead of useless or helpless.. just bcuz I can do things myself doesn't mean I have to.. good for them is good for me & versa-vice,,...... social life¿?..... lol my social life consists of about a bakers dozen of coworkers 5 - 6ish days a week,,, who I'm kind to all of them ,,, for the most part....ish.......majority,, of the time....soooo hard sometimes,,,,ughhhhhhwhhhimperss......... but like Jackie Moon said
" ELE everyone lick,, I mean love,, everyone.... SO love... & not LICK!!!
........well maybe lick... in some cases.... l got it. Lick the ones u love... wait....then thats everyone..... kk sorry folks no licking....wait...less your playing alphabet ice cream or lickionairy with your significant other(s)ish.... whateverish,, to eaches own,, lick at your own discretion
..... so ya im that...ohhh and the other 1.5 ish days a week,, nap & drink coffee.... simultaneously.. nonstop... seriously,, so seriouslynotserious but pretty close tho.... anywho, to All..ish good luck, good night.. bonne chance, bonner nuit,, adieux from a deud
It sounds like you've found a balance between self-reliance and allowing yourself to lean on others when needed, which is great. Your social life might revolve around interactions with coworkers, and it's understandable that navigating those relationships can sometimes be challenging. Remembering to approach interactions with kindness can go a long way, even when it's difficult. And as for Jackie Moon's advice, loving everyone is definitely a good goal to strive for, even if the licking part might need some clarification! It's important to find humor and joy in life, whether it's through interactions with others or enjoying your own company. Wishing you continued balance and happiness in your journey!
5. Born neurodivergent. It makes little difference what your motivation and feeling. You will be misunderstood and humiliated. You will misinterpret others. As a lama once said to me “It’s not all about reward and punishment”. He also said “People can be very fundamentalist about karma. Some things are just plain bad luck”.
Don’t make assumptions.
If you have a ‘one size fits all’ view of dharma - you are probably proud and confused.
technology... the smartphone is killing relationships.
The rise of smartphones and technology has certainly changed the way we interact and connect with others. While smartphones offer many conveniences and opportunities for communication, they can also sometimes lead to a sense of disconnection or distraction in face-to-face interactions. It's important to find a healthy balance and be mindful of how technology impacts our relationships. Setting boundaries around smartphone use during quality time with loved ones can help prioritize meaningful interactions and strengthen relationships.
I totally agree. No one wants to talk on the phone. People think texting is talking.
i prefer to please God , I prefer to be with others that do too. It's not possible it is harder to be with many people but Jesus did it so when I have to I rely on Christ in me to enable me to be with them but remain at peace.
Bible scholar Dan McClellan, I like watching his videos. Interesting.
That's a beautiful perspective. Relying on your faith to find peace and strength in social situations is inspiring. It's wonderful that you seek to please God and connect with others who share your values. Thank you for sharing your faith and experience.
That’s me.
I never fail to be astounded at how illiterate people are in these current times. Many of the commenters likely have worthwhile comments, but same are lost when one attempts to decipher the intolerable grammar and lack of punctuation etc. etc.
I wonder how these people hold gainful employment. Don’t agree with me ? Try to comprehend the comments ! Brutal !
You've written EXACTLY what I was thinking. So painful to observe. I'm a high school substitute instructor in the US; the illiteracy rate is getting worse by the year. Yet the students will be permitted to 'graduate'. Situation is quite frightening and appalling. I'm simply forced to look away and carry on.
@@janetkriegl6720 very disturbing and it’s gonna get worse. Wait until it’s the Covid era kids are texting and commenting.
At least I can comprehend that problem tho. Square your shoulders and carry on. It’s not your fault.
By the way, I expect a raft of criticism for my remarks. So your remarks are appreciated.
It depends if the environment tolerates it. Where I am many are using atrocious English and this is tolerated. I am reprimanded whenever I speak up on using good and correct English. I am still learning and always like to mingle with people who are into using correct and good English.
@@user-tj6bf5rf7d I comprehend your circumstance. More power to you!
@@janetkriegl6720shame on you for turning away, your job surly is to teach and in your own words you turn away. How do you think they are going to learn. Do you job you waster.
5)Weird relatives...