My Wife Had an Affair With My Best Man
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- čas přidán 9. 05. 2024
- My Wife Had an Affair With My Best Man
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"She has really strong Christian values" NO SHE DOESN'T!😐
Most Christian girls are hoes anyway
She had, until she was tempted. Why didn't she just call off the wedding if she was already hooking up with the best man. This is 100% her problem. She is feeling guilty and knows the easy way out is divorce. Working to rebuild is something she is not willing to do at this time. She got a taste of the wild side and wants more of it. Divorce her, even filed for full custody. He won't get it, but explain for the world that she wanted to abort Rather then deal with her shitty behavior. She might decide to swallow her pride and work on it but I doubt it. If not willing to share all electronics 100% at anytime or place then she is not 🚫 interested in making it work. I bet she is still in contact with her AP. Be the bad guy, file for divorce. Move on.
I almost always expect a horrible person to HaVE StROng ChRIsTiAn VaLuEs
She has hoebag values
Church thots are very predatory
25 year old guy. He has his whole life ahead. Other women will want this guy. He should 100% leave her.
Yes other women may want him, but he won't be a good man to them, because of this trauma. He seems deeply affected, and if he doesn't do therapy and heal, he will not be able to "show up" for his future partner.
This is indeed a sad case....
Poor guy is so naive
@@matthill2957 Agreed. It seems that way.
@@Cekatu Everyone is deeply affected by cheating and this poor man's pain is really fresh and raw. It's also compounded by a double betrayal by a so called friend. He can heal though. He needs time.
Yeah, I agree, she's not worth spit. He may have to look at some self-worth issues to avoid ending up with another one just like her.
1. Forgive them both, outwardly & inwardly.
2. Divorce her.
3. Wish him the best.
4. Be excited for your new life.
In that order.
Divorce first.
Why wish the best friend ‘the best’?
@@tasfiatanzila Just meant it as a ‘goodbye’, for him to completely remove the friend from his life.
@tasfiatanzila I wished my ex wife and my friend the best in an effort to forgive and move on...5 years later I'm still working on honestly getting it right....
Nothing exciting about a future like this
“She has strong Christian values”
“Iiiii mean not super strong…”
Delony kills me 😂😂😭😭
"Super strong Christian values." Intimate relations with her fiance before marriage, at the same time also with his best friend, immediately wanted an abortion. Not seeing any Christian values here.
Lol
I’m dead lol
You can't fight for your marriage if you are the only one fighting.
Well said
He is getting cucked. No man should stay with wife if she's getting railed by someone else.
Unfortunately too many ppl believe they can save it all by themselves
I had to learn that the hard way
Ditto
Leave her, if you cant trust her you dont have a marriage..
There’s a saying it goes “ trust a firefighter with your life, not your wife”
@@trumpisgod2535Would you trust this D bag protecting your community? 🤔
@@trumpisgod2535oh wow! 😂
Technically she left him by her choices and he’s just moving on.
@@stacyjaye6350 that’s actually a rule in most fire stations that every firefighter knows. This guy must be a cadet or in probationary period which is 18 months.
He absolutely should leave her. Dude deserves way better
He married his mom. BPD is very powerful for all involved.
I feel for Bro. This episode brought me to tears and reminded me of my first love.
I Wish him the best in all aspects of life. Hope he heals his spirit, heart, mind and eventually regains his confidence in himself.
I fell in love with my ex fiancé back when I was 19. We dated and lived together for a few years, then I proposed at 23. She said Yes. We were childhood friends(families knew each other) but we didn’t date until we graduated High School. She had a couple boyfriends before me, but she was my “first”. I was crazy in love with her… gosh…
At this time I was recovering from a bad car accident. We didn’t have a lot of intimacy, I was jacked up from back/hip pain, medication and still continued to work and manage a team. I remember coming home one evening after my physical therapy session and I found her with another Man. My heart was shattered and I tried my best to not cry in front of her. She had zero remorse and even smiled because she knew it hurt me. I took all my clothes put it in a hamper and took my dog. We then drove to my work underground garage(of a commercial building called ATG Stores in Kirkland, WA). This would be the place I lived for a month because I was so ashamed, guilty and embarrassed that I picked her over my family and friends during the relationship. I lived there for about a couple months dodging security, taking showers at the local gym, etc. if you been here before, you know I did everything to take care of my dog, survive and still perform at work while recovering from my car accident. It was hell.
Fast forward two months and I’m exhausted and sick of living out of my car. I decided I would tell my parents the truth… but of course I came to this realization after downing plentiful cups of sorrow whiskey. So, On the way to my parent’s house I had the darkest idea, I imagined myself driving into a wall and it sounded pretty sweet to Me. Once I finished that thought and decided to commit, A state patrol pulled me over. He sat with me and I ugly cried for an hour on the side of the freeway I-5 North going to Marysville, WA. After I told him my story he told me to keep fighting, gave me a hug and told me he would follow me all way back to my parent’s house. He saved my life and this was God’s way of telling me I he has plans for Me. It’s not over yet.
It took me two years before I could put myself out there and try again. 2.5 before my first date. Gosh, it was demoralizing.. I forgot how to flirt and charm girls, The growing pains of trying again sucked!! Especially when you get stood up on multiple occasions and learn to try again after many rejections. It does a lot to a Man’s mojo/rizz/charisma. Best thing I learned from this was to Be Myself and be authentic. My super power is that there’s only one Me! How cool is that?! Hell yeah!
I’m 32 now, Still single; 9 years of internal work, healing, fitness, traveling and building a business helped Me in so many levels, it gave me a sense of purpose, freedom and Self. In addition, reasons to keep fighting to live a fulfilling life and helping others.
Truthfully, I still struggle with dating, being vulnerable and communicative, but I’ll keep trying. You know, Sometimes I don’t feel worthy but when the sad/loneliness thoughts creep in, I do my best to remind myself that I AM worthy of someone that has all the amazing qualities. No one’s perfect but to find a rare, sweet and genuine lady that is down for you on all levels is possible… Maybe one day..
On a side note: It was the best thing that ever happened to me because I discovered so many things about Myself(Good and bad)! 100% needed to happen in my life for me to grow/develop into who I am now.
Thanks to anyone taking the time to read this condense story. Hope everyone out there lives a healthy, peaceful and fulfilling life! And if no one told you today, You’re worth it! Fasho! 🤜🏼🤛🏼🫶🏼
-Rich N.
As a 35 year old.
I was shocked when you said you’re only 32.
The way you talked had me thinking you’re older. (Not a bad thing tho) just means you’re wise.
you definitely have someone special coming for you, keep it up rich.
Many hugs. 🤗
Very Beautiful Testimony. God is so God & Thankful u experienced some1 who was the hands & feet of Jesus. I admire your strength to do all you did to gain self worth & confidence in who you are. Life is a beautiful journey especially when God teaches us to love who we are. We then can love life on many levels & have boundaries to protect our hearts & territory. Glad you shared your story & I hope this guy gets to read it to help him stand strong & know some1 better out there for him. God Bless You. I know you will choose wisely if you decide to find another woman. There are good women out there.
That's awesome bro. Awesome story!
I felt ye story deep down in me harrrt. 😂
No seriously, many men go through this. Understanding all of female nature is so important for men who want relationships. Men who don't want relationships or marriage don't need to understand female nature, but ironically we're the ones who understand it most.
I hope you have strong and supportive family and friends, especially male ones, in your corner who will guide you and give you the relationship of wisdom you need to make only wise decisions and only good investments.
Thanks for your words. My story is similar but also different. I'm 30 bow trying to work through a major loss I've had the last year.
Your only 25 run. Don't listen this cannot survive. She cheated during an engagement and it continued after they got married absolutely disgusting.
you’re spot on. she has strong Christian values!!! Also getting pumped with so much cum she doesn’t even know who her baby belongs to. jfc just divorce
This poor man needs to stop holding onto any type of false hope. I'm baffled that John would act like this could work out in any way. It's very rare a cheating situation can be worked out. This woman has shown no signs that she can ever be trusted, or that she even wants to work on it.
After this he'll be redpilled and blame 3.5 billion women. All because he married someone for something most likely because she dyes her hair blonde lol.
@@Vale10952shut up hood he should women blame all men all the time
It's time to move on. Trust will never ever return. Successful relationships require TRUST. It's over. You need time to recover. Good luck dude!
"She's had really strong christian values"
Sorry man, you have yet to come to terms with this.
Bingo
I'm not trying to Judge because I had a kid before I was married buy having kids without being MARRIED are not STRONG CHRISTIAN VALUES. That kid brought me back to GOD because I realized I wasn't as strong a Christian as I should be
@@labmitch amen
+ abortion idea
+ cheating
Just starting that's not christian values.
It’s sad that he applies such thing considering that’s not considered a Christian value
"Behavior is a language." So important.
We are also not always our behaviour
@@heyyou9839 Maybe so. But who someone most authentically IS is revealed by their behavior - not by who they think or say they are.
@@uncle0ericOur behavior and decisions are the few things completely within our control. Adultery is completely a language and a choice. Very telling.
@@heyyou9839that really isn't the point of the statement but I see what you mean
Point is behaviour in its self is a form of communication, you need to be able to understand it Ig (I don't really want to get into the nuances)
Best advice I’ve ever received was somebody telling me “Get Over It”
Divorce her. Keep getting money. Stop worrying about who she’s dating. Find someone who loves you. Focus on your kid.
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them."
- Maya Angelou
i love that quote. she was a great person.
What if they sounded so convincing? Would you believe them? 😂
Exactly!
@@BREEZYM6015 keyword: _shows._
@@BREEZYM6015 Again, it's in their ACTIONS, not their WORDS, which is the whole point of that quote.
he took her out of the gutter but she got homesick
So many women will appreciate you and love you like you deserve. You sound like an amazing man, husband and father. I'm feeling your pain, been through this too.😢
Amen
Damn!!!😬
He deserves better. I don't cheat like the wife
Stealing that line because it's perfect. Hope every good person finds their person
I like how you started out advocating for reconciliation but as you listened more you realize that this guys marriage was absolutely fvcked
Hearing this good man crying just further validates how horrible that woman is.
For the first time Dr John is giving bad advice.
Someone who cheats before your wedding, has a child with another man, continues the affair till she is caught is not WORTH a penny!
Throw that piece of Sh$T out!
DNA test and divorce lawyer immediately. Thank you for your service as a firefighter. You deserve and will find much better.
Mandatory dna tests should be demanded by every man start holding women accountable
@@BrianWaller-qe7grYou want to MANDATE that ALL new parents submit their childrens' DNA to unscrupulous corporations? Fascist much?
Presumed fathers who mistrust their partners have the legal right to test "their own" babies.
They did have a DNA test, that is his daughter. But yeah, he needs to divorce- it is a nightmare to share a life with someone like her…
It doesn't matter she's cheating on him with 11 different men.... and the father could be 15 different men... but she's still going to aquire all his possessions...the home and custody of the child... Which he will be forced to pay for whether it's his or not... There's no way out of this man except to stop getting married... I have no more sympathy for guys like this
@@JimSanchez-lg1njwhy do you incels come on to these things when Dr Johns or Ramsays values are inherently against yours
“I cheated on you with your best man for over a year. But no, you can’t look at my electronics that’s a violation of my boundaries.”
If you don’t GTF on somewhere.
And the fact that SHE didn’t tell him, HE CAUGHT HER and she tried really hard for 2 weeks 😂😅
Home girl was more dedicated to the affair , she did it for a whole year vs 2 weeks
*Street girl!
I believe Miss Evil cheated while they dated too, not just the duration of the marriage.
My man!!!! That 🤪 Vib. She really trying to make him feel like 💩
Exactly! Trying to manipulate that man’s emotions.
I was looking for this comment 🎉😂
The absolute best thing that Dr. John said was "Forgive your 13 year old self. Because a marriage takes 2". Choose reality. Keep doing the good work.
There is no coming back from this. Cut your loses, heal and find someone who deserves you
I stayed with my husband after his first affair. He went on to have a second affair and left me and our young daughter. I’m not saying couples can’t work through this, but your wife is showing she WILL do it again and isn’t willing to put in the work. You’re only 25. Please don’t waste your life like I did. The trauma is exhausting.
I wouldn't ever give it another chance again. I thought I wouldn't before I got cheated on. Then when you have 10 years under your belt,you think that history and love that you assume they have for you will make a difference. It was supposed to just be an emotional affair that didn't get physical. I warn people in this position that they are probably lying about that anyways. My ex was lying incessantly. You can't trust a cheater. There are channels dedicated to helping couples like this, and I fell for that. It's very rare the cheater changes though.
i'm so sorry 🙏🏿❤
You and anyone else that stays is stupid for staying. Point blank period
Yes it is. 😢
Did the same, my wife cheated six years later. Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Dude, you are 25 with a great job. Cut her lose and find you a sweetheart that will respect you❤
This is the kinda girl that would say “ if you loved me then you’d marry me “ while cheating. There’s no integrity and accountability in these kind of women
She doesn't love him and he breaks my heart 😢 he deserves much better
If I were him I would do my own paternity test on thr child just to double verify she isn't lying about who the father is.
He already did
Later in the video he confirms that he did the test and she is thankfully his blood
@@FancyRPGCanada Not sure if thankfully is the right word. Tough one. He loves his child, but now he's inextricably tied to this woman for a couple of decades.
John says he never recommends divorce unless someone is unsafe. It's a shame he doesn't consider emotional abuse to be in this same category. There's no chance this man is safe in his marriage with this kind of deceit that she would have never told him about, had he not found out. It is dangerous for him to continue with someone of this little integrity.
Agreed
1000% agree
That’s true but sometimes people really want to fight to the end. Although, infidelity is enough reason to leave if he so chooses.
The real shame is that people marry other people before finding out who they really are.
Like give it a few years…
If you’re with a POS who would do this, there’s no way they can successfully hide it for that long without any red flags, which are often ignored when they do pop up.
So John is defending the institution of marriage. The problem is when two people like this who had no business entering such an institution, goes and sullies it’s good name and adds to the ungodly divorce rate
@@italkgory99 He can't decide for them. No. They can always choose to continue. But...if someone was getting physically beaten and abused, John would still recommend them leave the situation, as he has stated. My point is that he should be doing the same thing, if the level of emotional abuse is high enough.
My husband just left me for another woman after 10 years of marriage. I had no clue I believed all of his lies. I thought he was my best friend and my heart. I have been shattered ever since. I really don't know how to move on.
That counselor was being bias…The good thing is that he’s only 25, he’s got time to heal and be blessed with his life partner because it wasn’t her 😌
I can't believe the female marriage counselor told the spouse that was cheated on that they didn't have the right to access the phone of the one that cheated. That's basically saying that the cheater has no obligation to demonstrate that they can be trustworthy again. I am speaking from experience when I say that if a cheater doesn't willing give you 100% access to all lines of communication that they used to cheat, it's over. There is no negotiation and this is step one, day one. I was offended myself that I had to be the one that first brought up this and that the cheater didn't offer this unsolicited. This so called "counselor" is giving advice as a legal consultant rather than someone that is doing anything remotely close to repairing broken trust in a marriage. She is doing the opposite of trying to save a marriage with a child involved. That is divorce lawyer advice. She is a quack! This guy would have never had a means to build back trust in his wife because she was not being made to be accountable or responsible for her cheating.
@@WgWilliams I totally agree with you, I’m sorry that you had to experience a cheater, I can relate and they are never usually made to be accountable.
I hope this guy finds a new wife who adores him. He sounds like an amazing man.
Agree
What about him sounds amazing? All you know about him is that he’s a firefighter who got cheated on. Your standards can’t possibly be _this_ low…
@@dewilew2137how is her standard low because she thinks that a dude who got cheated on might be a great man? I would get it if he said “I was abusive” & she still said “he sounds like a great man” but he didn’t give off any red flags in this video. Why not think he might be a great guy?
@@elijahpiere5324she didn’t say “he might be/could be an amazing man”, she said “he sounds like an amazing man”. I agree with the other commenter. We don’t know if he is amazing. He might be but I don’t know what he would have said that is proof positive
@@montymython754 ...how about because he tried his best to save his marriage despite his wife cheating on him for a year, and is remaining dedicated to his daughter despite that. A lot of men don't do that, and certainly dedication, and loyalty are good qualities.
That’s actually kind of wild that he’s even considering the marriage surviving. Like really that’s CRAZY.
Beyond absurd
High school sweetheart syndrome is definitely blinding his judgement.
He had promised himself as a child to never get divorced i think plays a big part too
Its not crazy. He told us his childhood was led by a mother with BPD . Can you join the dots? Quit calling trauma informed responses crazy.
Ya the whole 'build something new' I've never understood, maybe I'm to dumb lol. He says this alot in videos when the woman cheats. But how can you build something new with someone that wrecked the first thing you 'built' together?
Being the Best Man and the Worst Man is crazy
This is the same kind of woman that will put visine in your water… run young man, god bless you to have the faith that you deserve better.
Too many crime network episodes😂 I just saw the Visine story😊
I don’t really care what the details are….there is no way you can stay with that woman or be friends with that best man. Cut ties completely and eventually you’ll be able to work this out in your mind. Counseling and strong friendships with others.
My sentiments exactly.. the fact that he even considered staying with her after that is nuts to me. I’ve walked away from women I loved before over disrespect.. it’s a tough thing to do but it’s worth it to maintain my self respect.
There is a child … there are ties forever
@@mariasullivan577Yes and he's owned a loving life. She did it. The child needs love too, but he/she can still whilst the parents are not together. He will love her to the end. (It's a girl, I just heard.)
Agree. Cut ties except for the child. Get a good lawyer.
That poor child
The treason here goes way too deep. HE caught her, she didn't even confess to it. Horrible in every level.
She would have taken it to her effing grave. So sad
@@303mitchmost do so without blinking an eye.
@@matinaki1644 What cruelty
@@303mitch they consider it an "act of love" because what you don't know doesn't hurt you. Go figure.
@@matinaki1644 I see. I could see how someone could get there pathologically. Unfortunate that they don't have the emotional depth to recognize that they are preventing that person from exercising their own autonomy. We all deserve the truth.
You won't lose your child. She can be with you 50% of the time. Please make the most of it every second you have her.
Went through something simular at your, I'm 40 now. Had daughter with girlfriend, rough patch, she gets prego by my cousin, we fight and try and work it out, she miscarries (felt like I dodged bullet) we stay together 3 years longer, she cheats again and by this time I don't care. I kick her out, she goes and lives with mom, gets beat by new man. That was 8 yrs ago. We're friends today and mutually raise our daughter. 2 peaceful homes is better than 1 chaotic home. I feels like the hurt will never go away but just give yourself time. We keep going for our kids, now head up, shoulders back, and remember you're a Top G. Prayers brother.
Some therapists are objectively terrible.
Sure, are you referring to deloney?
Therapists make more of peoples trauma continuing these days. Some of them are scum
Yeah I always wonder how much of their own biases and prejudices they bring into how they provide therapy.
That is crazy
Dr Baloney gives horrible advice. There is nothing so evil a woman can do that he can’t put the onus on the man.
A wife like this doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. 1 YEAR LONG?!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE DOESN’T DESERVE IT.
* A hussy
This is common sense to most people but the fact that he’s already forgiven her tells me everything I need to know about how much of a loser this guy is😭
@@dragonsurge1 it’s sad honestly. he needs to grow a backbone
Forgiveness is always necessary. But it’s not easy. So many people make forgiveness and reconciliation synonymous and it’s not. He can forgive her and move on or he can stay that’s up to him.
@@dragonsurge1he’s stuck on what was and hasn’t come to terms with what is yet and who she has become. Not the same woman he fell in love with in highschool.
When he said his mom has BPD it was crystal clear to me why he struggles to draw a real line in the sand with his wife. My son’s mom has BPD and I went through a lot of similar issues.
Same
She has NO Christian values. She has a broken moral compass. That child probably belongs to your former best friend. The Bible addresses this: he gets to divorce her with impunity! Don't give her a second chance. Don't do it! Once a cheater, always a cheater! It wasn't a one-time thing. It lasted a whole year. She has no respect you, and certainly no fear of God. Don't stay "for the sake of the child." Of course she will agree to anything and promise anything! Don't believe her! Run, buddy! RUN!
It sounds like the paternity test came back that the other guy wasn’t the dad. He should still confirm with his own test.
It's an incredibly difficult situation, but the Bible is clear: there is to be no divorce; they are bound to each other for life. But if they do divorce, they are supposed to stay single for the rest of their lives or reconcile.
@@DPhaselyBible specifies that the only reason for divorce is for adultery read Matthew 19:9
@logan-kj6uu no, that's not what that means. Jesus is referring to the temporary law that Moses gave for the hardness of mens heart, that if a husband found his wife to be unclean ( adultery ) he could divorce, but the jews took advantage of that law to divorce their wives for anything unclean they found in their wives, whether it was a nasal discharge or an issue of blood. So there is not to be any divorce. Jesus even says, "From the beginning, it was not so," meaning that divorce was never an option.
@logan-kj6uu I know that verse well, but that's not what it means. Jesus is referring to the temporary law God gave to Moses to allow divorce if a man found his wife unclean ( adultery) because of the hardness of their heart, but the jews took advantage of that law to find anything unclean about their wives ( discharge from nose, issue of blood, etc. ) to divorce them. Even Jesus states that "From the beginning it was not so," meaning there was not to be any divorce. Ultimately, God set up that temporary law because of a deeper spiritual reason: Israel as a nation was worshipping other gods ( spiritual fornication), and the law was to stone a fornicating wife, but God could not kill Israel because Jesus had to come out of Israel, so He could only divorce her.
Believe what you see, not what you hear. Sadly, his marriage is over. Dear Young Man, Walk away.
Don't walk...Run!
Yup, when it comes to women: don’t listen to what they say, watch what they do.z
This woman isn’t worth this man’s time and energy.
Any woman who can cheat with her fiancé’s best friend for a year, have his baby and lie about the baby’s paternity isn’t worth a man’s time.
The kid is the husbands. The one she aborted was the other guys
I'd do my own DNA test. She's from the cold streets he can't trust her test. He probably should get STD check too. I hope he gets away from that nasty situation.
@@Evelyn-jx8voshe didn't abort.
She is pathological. Who could do this to someone? She is the worst of the worst.
Run man! She will do it again 100%. You sound like a good and solid man. So many women would love a man like you. She is playing with your heart and head. Stand up and run.
.
I am a woman, and I approve of this message.
So sorry for your pain. You didn't deserve this.
There's a beautiful woman out there who thinks like you, and who is wanting to meet someone like you. She will love you, and your daughter. And, you will love her passionately. 🌷❤🌷
This is why I hate when people call cheating a “mistake “ it is a choice and intentional, which is why it’s all the more worse when the affair partner is someone you personally know getting gratification from the deception. Leave her.
That is them just minimizing. Sexual encounters don’t just happen, many steps must be taken first. And when “friends “ have sex with mates of friends it is a special brand of abuse. I do feel very bad for the baby girl. A solution could be two adults sharing a home and parenting but not as a couple.
You're confounding "mistake" with "accident." A mistake can be an "action or judgment that is misguided or wrong." But in this case, it wasn't a one time thing followed by immediate regret. It went on for a long time.
What's esp. crazy about this affair is that it started before they were even married. Very few cheaters will ever change. In a case like this, she didn't respect her marriage or him before it even started, which truly makes it impossible. I can't believe I'm seeing people blame him or throw shade on him in other threads (not this one). Still rattled about that.
And even more complicated when children are involved.
@@73cidaliaBut first it’s a choice.
You’re not losing your daughter, you’re teaching your daughter how to have self respect. You got this, dude. You can find someone who can love you and your family much better than this.
But technically he is losing at minimum 50% of his time with his daughter. And women know this...they don't care. The destruction and devastation they cause should be a crime.
@@wLBlueTrue. That applies to both genders.
@gmirelys7898 right...yet women are filling th3 majority of divorces. Women either picked a bad man, left a good man, or drove a good 1 away.
The attitude of the modern Woman is whatever Mommy does to you you'll get over it
This brought tears to my eyes, the situation and the toxicity of the wife. I wish you the best Daniel, God be with you and help you🙏
It may seem like it will never happen but you will get through this my guy. Let her go. Trust me, years from now you are going to laugh about it
Man sometimes I think I’m having a bad day and then I listen to this show and immediately become grateful 🤣
Amen 😂
Absolutely agree
Don't rejoice at others misfortune... :/
I think John sometimes focuses on the fact that a marriage *could* be saved, and isn't nearly forthright enough about whether it *should* be saved.
I agree
What is that "saved marriage" anyway? I see that a lot. Like how is something unhealthy and toxic being prolonged "saving"?
I reckon it's also part of the process. Find out where the guys head & heart is at. What they've tried to do to reconcile, what alternatives he's considered, whether he's deluding himself. Also whether he's overreacting & it can be saved. It's part of the sequence that gets the guy thinking beyond the infidelity, & honestly facing the future, not just spinning wheels in his head.
Exactly! Maybe its better that the guy come to that conclusion on his own but this marriage is way past salvageable. Cheating is already a deal breaker for me, but cheating with family memebers and friends is the most disgusting behavior. This woman has no clue or inclination on being a committed partner, so why play around with the idea. Just be honest and tell the guy its over even though you know hes going to try and forgive her. If you dont have self respect, you cant expect others to have it for you either, and taking her back would be a complete lack of self-respect
The caller didn’t ask how to end his marriage, he asked if it can be saved how would he do it? And he told him what should happen. The caller said none of it would even be possible so he lets the caller figure it out for themselves.
Oh my heart! WHEW. This one ripped my heart out. Thank you for putting forward these raw conversations. There is hope for this man & his daughter to build something beautiful from the ashes. Yes, get a good attorney and a good therapist. You got this!
"Judge the actual action in front of you!!"
Many prayers sent your way! ❤️ 🙏
He deserves better
Does he though?
How many stories of “perfect men getting cheated on by their heartless wifes” do we need to hear before we see that there’s a connection between all these stories?
She cheated on him with his best man for over a year and he might not even be the father of his child and his first question is how does he forgive her? 💀
The reality is this man is a spineless pathetic DOOR MAT and his wife cheated on him because she has ZERO respect for him!!🤦♂️
She can’t possibly LOVE him because he doesn’t even love himself!!
No one deserves to be treated like that by their spouse.
@@dragonsurge1 I got that impression too.
@@dragonsurge1 its also a reality that she is a bop, shes for the streets and deserves no forgiveness and no contact with this man at all.
@@dragonsurge1 What horrible comments from horrible people.
Why on earth did this woman get married? She clearly had no intention of being faithful to her husband…and she made a baby with him who will never know the security of an intact family. Sis destroyed the lives of the two people she’s supposed to love more than anyone in the world within a year. Nice going, ma’am.
Ma'am? Nope she's evil.
Because she settled for the nice guy, she wanted her ‘special day’….. a ring on her finger…… But she’s not attracted to this man, she’s chasing Chad and Tyrone and the butterflies. She’s not wife material
He said she's heavily Christian aka brainwashed to think marriage (and baby)= happy life. It doesn't. Christians lie about that all the time. I bet he was her first- aka high school sweethearts get married in their early 20's and now she realised she made a huge mistake staying with him and wasting her early 20's when she could be out figuring out who she is and what she wants in a man.
@@barryc9115 “Settled”?? She’s a pig. I’d say he settled for her.
@barryc9115 don't bring Tyrone into this 😂😂😂
You need to realise too that you are the good person here. You are good. You deserve the world.
What a sweetheart he is! This is one of the toughest calls to listen to. When you're in the thick of it, it's so hard to see things clearly especially with a bad counselor in the mix. Listen to your instincts and what people tell you about themselves. Do the best you can and it will get better and clearer with time.
Time to send her packing. She’s likely still seeing the other guy or easily someone new. You deserve a faithful honest partner.
Yep would have been better to pay for the packing than the wedding
She loves the other man, not him.
She doesn't respect him because he's weak
@@fredalwatkins4506 I am guessing you are late teens early twenties with this comment. A woman not respecting you is not because "you" are weak, it can be for any number of reasons. But when it is a consequence of a lack of respect, it is important to remember that you shouldn't assume the woman is a good judge of character or qualities, especially "weakness". A woman will cheat on a stronger man with a weaker one because she is to stupid to know what actual strength is.
@@fredalwatkins4506 I don't care what her excuses are. She's actually the one who is weak and she totally lacks morals and respect for anyone. This is not at all on him. It's squarely on her, and any cheater, whether male or female.
My wife had an affair with my groomsman (her high school friend) for 3 years. This stuff is happening way too often!!!!!!!! BTW I kicked her out immediately and divorced her ass
👏🏼 👏🏼👏🏼
As you should!!🎉
3 years. That’s horrible
Good for you!!! Too bad you can’t call and talk to this guy - he needs bro support from someone who has been through it.
God bless you Joe
I'm in my late 40a, married with kids. Dude is young at 25. Lots of living to be done and opportunities for a new relationship and more kids. Staying with the cheater erases all options for a healthy and happy life for everyome close to this guy.
Let that woman go. These facts will hurt you all your life. Forgive her and let her go And love your Child
My ex did something similar but during the immigration process she was in the Philippines. The relationship was never the same. No matter how much I tried I felt empty inside knowing her kids should of been mine but she went back to her ex while I was filing the paperwork to bring her to the states. I took her back because I was lonely.
@@BrianWaller-qe7gr i'm so sorry 🙏🏿❤
I reckon don't father the child. Let her be a single mother and struggle.
The Bible said we can divorce in case of infidelity. If he was brother or best friend, I’d encourage divorce.
Agree. Exactly what I thought. She's no Christian and he needs to do right by his mental and physical health.
The Bible also says you can rape your maid if your wife can't get children. Nothing more silly then come up with the Bible for actual advice.
Thought the same
Especially so early in the marriage!!
I feel for this man and I know his pain. Walked in on my husband literally in the act. The relationship will never be the same. I can't tell someone else what to do, but once that trust is gone there will always be those questions in the back of your mind.
You are a brave man, Daniel! She doesn’t deserve you buddy and I truly wish and hope you can overcome this. Light/Happiness is always at the end of the tunnel.
25?? Bro is still young as ever. LEAVE HER. You still have your entire life ahead of you, no use wasting it trying to salvage trust with garbage individuals who clearly have no integrity.
Yah but he has built that one relationship since High school, it’s exhausting just thinking about finding someone else a building a relationship and it takes time
@@BigRed2true but he is still young and it was high school 🏫 people change over the years
@@BigRed2 I know it must feel exhausting for him and crushing. It's going to take time for him to heal and get right again. Thank goodness he has his daughter to keep him pushing forward. He does have his life ahead of him and it's easier to bounce back and to meet people when you're younger.
What’s wrong with these people?!
Why would someone do such a heinous act! 😡😡😡
I’m talking about the wife, btw…
And the best man too they’re both scum
It's called hypergamy. Women (in general) have always been attracted to wealth and power to provide a better life for themselves and their children. While that's well established, the percentage of women willing to toss aside their current love for someone of higher status is open for debate. This woman already had the caller secured but she tried to move up to the boss before tying the knot with the caller. He wouldn't commit so she settled for the caller. That doesn't mean she had to quit trying though. I wouldn't be surprised if she was looking into paternity not because she was worried it wasn't her husband's but rather she was hoping it was the boss so she could pressure him that way.
No conviction, no faith
@@brianprobert3090 Spot on 🎯
My heart breaks for him. Brought my to tears. Stay strong!
I went through something similar, but i had 3 kids. I thought my heart would blow up. But time will heal you, you will get theough this, you deserve someone who loves you back .
This man will be amazed when he finds someone else who treats him wonderful and wants him for him, and he won’t believe how much happier he will be in the future. He’s so young. He can’t see past his pain.
He never will because he's weak. Weak men don't find good women.
That's how I was at 29 when my ex got busted cheating. Spent four years being single and moving forward, building a new life with my daughter (my ex basically left us for a kid at her store), etc. Then God introduced an amazing woman into my life and it's been incredible ever since.
Yup. I had low self worth and went for the wrong guys but always knew if anyone cheated or was talking to another female I’d be out of there. My number one deal breaker
He's got to get a lawyer and protect himself. She does Not love him or the daughter. A year long affair???? No!!!!
Love how you opened w/your 1st guest, Dr. John bc it is SO easy to get right into the emotional gutter in these heart heavy situations. Look down @ the situation instead letting yourself sink into an emotional mess over & over. Easier said than done. I'D know. It totally sucks!
This poor guy. Sending Thoughts and prayers his way
Don’t be a fool and stay. It’s already broken. Respect yourself dude!
A random dude is bad enough but his boss and friend? Nope that’s unrecoverable. The disrespect from both of them is disgusting
I just can't fathom the idea of John thinking this marriage can survive.
This…
I was shocked to hear him so say this marriage is dead in the water…
Me too. John jumped the gun there without knowing the whole story.
I think the hardest thing is to move on. But staying with a cheater and wondering if he/she is honest all the time is even harder for me. You will overcome eventually. You didn’t just get betrayed by your wife, you got betrayed by your best friend. So sorry to hear that. You’re still in denial, but good thing you got a help from Dr. John. Get a lawyer and move on. Will be hard but best thing is to get rid of a cheater.
I went through something similar to this. After 5 months of deep anger, sadness, wondering ‘why did she do this’ I finally moved on after I reached acceptance that it happened. There is no forgiveness. Sorry. I can’t and won’t do that cuz that means I have to do the work because of her choices. From then on, I have been fine. That was 3 years ago. Karma has kicked in in many ways. I’m happier now than I have been in many years.
Accept that it happened. Grieve a bit. Focus on your future and start the next chapter of your life. Don’t let her memory stall you any longer.
I have never clicked a John Deloney video so fast as this one when I saw the title
I need to find out if she’s safe!
🫖 🔥
@@mustangthingsher well being means little.
Same. I'm expecting John to tell the guy he effed up and needs to step up and make it right by this woman...but I'll find out soon.
@@Neoteny374yepcame in with the same expectation based on how he typically treats the male callers
It took me a long time to finally leave my cheating wife. So easy to judge from the outside. I hope he leaves her.
You are so right. It’s not an easy process. Doing it properly requires time and effort, but on the other side, life can be absolutely fantastic.
Hope he realizes that neither his estranged wife nor his “friend” were ever actually friends of his. A friend would never betray a sacred trust like that.
It is shocking. Betrayal shocks you and the response may be late. It is natural. But this is quite different from not acknowledging that there is a sever breach of trust and acting like normal.
Been there, done that. Its VERY hard to forget. When she is late or doesn't answer a phone call, the questions get loud....GL
He will find someone 100x better. A love and trust he deserves ❤
Poor guy. You can hear the pain and heartbreak in his voice 😢
This man should tell his wife to go live with her boyfriend. Find out if this baby is your, if not make sure your name is taken off of the birth certificate. Throw her out and I am a woman who gives has nothing but respect for this man. He needs to get some counseling and move on.
Leave her. Leave NOW, before she leaves you and it hurts even worse. Go to the courts and get visitation for your daughter, so she can’t use her to manipulate you. If you stay, she’ll behave, but only for a short time. She will not respect you and she will see you as weak, if you stay. Make no mistake…she WILL do it again, if you stay. Leave, let it hurt for a while, feel it, let it teach you, and move on much stronger and wiser. You’ll get to a point where you will be grateful for what you just experienced. I wish you the best and we truly appreciate you for your service. ❤️
Leave. You are young. Make sure you are ok before anything. Don’t get too worried about your marriage until you are ok with whatever decision you make whether you stay or leave
RUN from this woman. You deserve so much better.
Divorce, take full custody with her having visitation, recognize your patterns of choosing what is familiar and move on.
I would add get paternity test
Baby may not be his!
Unfortunately, in at least some states, if you sign the birth certificate, in marriage or not, and the child is found to Not be Biologically yours, in court, you, as a man, are Still legally subjected to child support if the biological mother or whomever has custody besides the “father documented on the birth certificate,” like a grandparent, pursues it. So, be very careful of whom you date-That is your warning area and don’t have sex till marriage-That would stop a Lot of unwanted pregnancies, obviously before conception even takes place. Plus, in general, a father can legally have more rights to that child when that child is at least Born within marriage and you research the law for yourself AND get a good lawyer that doesn’t intend to screw you over-that is the Main thing-get a lawyer that actually Wants to help their client.
At 25 you'll be okay man. The right one is out there for you!
Praying for him he's been through the fire at such an early age. Breaks my heart just listening to him
Poor guy, a double betrayal.
Dr John on point.
I’d bet she is sleeping around while they are separated.
I hear that's like _the_ thing to do. Gross if you ask me, but I'm old fashioned.
She certainly cheated while they dated. I don't do separations, it's a freedom to enjoy the single fun life again. We either stay and work together or spit/divorce, no separating.
Congratulations on the 600K subs
My heart hurts for him. Prayers! 😢❤
How is it that horrible people always get or attract good/loyal mates. So many episodes like this and in the reverse.🤯
Because it sounds like his mom had issues. He says she had BPD and he sees the same in his wife. Justifies her cheating by saying it's due to the BPD. I think he's trying to save his mom and/ or feel love and affirmation from his mom that he likely never received. It's devastating. :(*
There's nothing left. Protect yourself and your precious daughter. You will not lose your daughter. Lawyer up. She is a horrible person.
Be glad you found out this quickly. Some people waste 20 years in similar circumstances.
No way I would stay married to someone like that. I'd rather start over with someone with better values.
I'm trying not to judge her, but at the same time: I'M JUDGING HER!
It's crazy he's not divorcing this toxic woman.. nothing to salvage here
because she is the only woman he knows.....he has stated they were high school sweet hearts. he needs to let her go probably the hardest thing is going to do in his life.
@@triplecheesemacWell that was his first mistake. Thinking your high school sweetheart is the ONE is childish thinking. He has nobody to blame for himself.
I relate to this guy. So sorry bro.
“Forgive yourself for making a promise that you didn’t realize at a young age takes two people.”
You wanted to make sure your daughter’s parents never divorced. But you can’t control it. Not without giving up all your boundaries.
Dude, this is devastating. I'm so sorry you and your daughter have to deal with this.
This man got dosed the biggest red pill ever pressed…
I have stated that you don't go searching to be Redpilled, the Redpill aka the truth will finds you.
He’s on the path from blue to red…. But he’s still blue. If he was red pill she would already be back on the streets and not in his house. He’s digging through a dump truck full of trash to cling to a coffee can of good in her. He’ll just end up smelling like trash doing that.
@@barryc9115I love this…agreed
@@barryc9115and possibly contracting hepatitis.
Not all women are like the one in the video tho. Red pill implies they are all like that. He just got a bad one i think. Y'all think women are all like that??