I was a traditional stay at home Mom already had received my Nursing degree. I am very glad I did. When the HEAD of the house became more emotionally abusive coupled with cheating I had a way out. I could survive. I in turn raised my daughter to be independent. I raised my son the same way. They can cook, clean, work and now as adults they have successful relationships! Their spouses feel appreciated and respected! Teach your children to respect themselves and have boundaries, be independent and most of all respect and appreciate their spouses .
Same. I hope my daughter never decides to be a trad wife, but if she ever does, i want to make sure she has a degree that can give her some financial security in case of emergency (and if I'm not there anymore)
@@LolaKlein I do agree that is important for women to have a back up plan. I myself got a degree while growing my family but I have never used it so not sure what use it is but luckily I have not had to find out as my husband a good, hard working, supportive man.
Say it louder for those in the back. When my ex-husband became abusive, I could support myself and my young son on my own. When I remarried, I was sure to marry someone who would be a partner, not a boss. We've split everything down the middle for nearly 33 years....earning power, childcare, housework, money, etc. Do we fight? Hell yeah....anyone with a free will is going to disagree with their partner at some point. Was it hard? Absolutely. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't cook and he doesn't scrub toilets...and I'm OK with that. We each have our strengths and we support each other. And no I don't wear lipstick while cleaning the bathroom LOL
Same for me as well. I spent 10yrs as a SAHM taking care of all the normal things but also earning my bachelors. Then, in 2020 during Covid, my husband began going off the rails with all kinds of horrible decisions along with cheating. We lost everything and I ended up in a 5th wheel with our son abandoned out at a camping ground in the middle of nowhere. While in the trailer, I spent 2021-2022 earning my masters and then my husband had a horrible accident and passed away at the beginning of 2022. I finished my grad degree 1 month after his accident. I was able to get my son and I out of that situation and into a 1 bedroom apartment then found a wonderful well paying job and now we’re in a really nice 2bedroom apartment making 6 figures. I’m hoping to buy a house in the next year. Without my degrees, I think my son and I would be in a really bad place. I literally thank God everyday for giving me the opportunity to complete my education and help us do for ourselves. I will always believe that women must have a contingency plan in place if they’re going to be dependent on their spouse just in case something goes really really wrong later on in life.
I love that you pointed out that the objective of feminism was too allow women to make their own decisions and not become pseudomen. Some of us prefer to be working mothers (and/or economically must), and some of us prefer to be stay at home mothers. It's having the ability to choose , having the ability to pursue opportunities if we want to/must, that is important.
This is the most sensible comment. As a 60 year old woman who has been married for forty years I’ve fought many fights over the years for women to have CHOICES. That’s what it boils down to. You can’t have it all, men never have. They have careers but don’t have the time with their children. It’s all about choice. I chose to be a stay at home mum, it worked for us. Neither me or my husband wear the trousers, the marriage does, it’s above us. We are now at a time in life where it’s back to just the two of us most of the time and we are having a ball.
I used to be a housewife for 5 years, now I work and I think that those 5 years were the happiest years. Don't listen to anybody who tries to impose their opinion on how your life should be like. If you want to be a housewife - do it. If you want to build a career - do it. You are the one who decides!
But why call yourself a tradwife, instead of just a woman doing what feels best for yourself? You can still be equal and have your husband know how to cook as well..
My husband doesn’t demand respect, that is why I naturally respect him. This husband gives me the creeps because he thrives on ruling over her, a true leader naturally leads and doesn’t need to establish that. As a housewife, I couldn’t be more happy to be with my amazingly caring husband who I love to serve because he truly appreciates and loves me and lets me be my own wild self.
Exactly this. There’s a difference between housewives and trad wives. Modern housewives may stay at home, but it’s seen as a partnership of equals between a husband and wife. Trad wife relationships seem to be about power dynamics and living a caricature of a bygone era.
I feel the same way about my husband!! It’s a huge blessing and my heart breaks for women who feel like they are locked into this and their husband gets to do whatever he wants.
I think the biggest thing I dislike is the way these trad wives speak poorly about feminism. Feminism is about woman having choice and genuine equality, not dominance. As a feminist I will fight for a womans right to choose to be a housewife, those two things are not fighting against each other. The role of being a home maker can be a genuine and meaningful choice for a woman to make. If a woman is genuinely happy (and from this 40 minute look into Lillian's life she seems that she is) then go for it, but don't speak against other woman doing what makes them happy. Same goes for carer driven woman, great... but don't look down on others with different priorities.
As a feminist, I will fight to defend the right of any person to be a stay at home partner in a healthy relationship, but I will also fight for the right of every person to work and find fulfillment and outside of the home.
I bet you the daughter will never forget this. I hope she remembers Stacey when deciding what to do with her life and maybe being pushed in one direction by her father.
This is just like The Duggar’s but without all the children & a different religion…🤔What if Lillian is ill with the flu, will Philippe then help out his wife & kids? My Dad helped my Mom & still worked . She also worked even after she had my brother & myself. My own Hubby & I both worked & shared household responsibilities. Plus if he is ill or vice versa we both pick up the slack for one another. Does this mean that I don’t respect or love him or vice versa …Not even close. I used to work full time the same as my hubby but when I had our 2nd child I worked as a nurse per diem or even part time so I COULD be there to teach & raise the children the way I WANTED too & worked P/T because with 3 children & my Mom was ill as well as I myself had health issues. When I wanted extra income I did other jobs so I could be at home & still be with my kiddos & we still helped each other & the kids as well as had alone time & Couple time. I DID NOT HAVE OBEY in our marriage vows & he said he wouldn’t want them to be in there. We are still married after 31 years. We both respect & love each other & our children were brought up w/o stereotypical roles. Whether you are a Girl or a boy you should teach your child how to cook, clean,do laundry , fix things around the home & do basics in your car. ( how to change a tire, change oil etc) as well as how to BUDGET, Food shop etc . The budget & how to do the bills were a taboo subject for my generation. This was a negative in my opinion. You be your own person, whether you’re married, single, have children or none at all. Just be happy & remember FAMILY & Friend’s ARE Important.
I LOOOOOVVVEEE being a homemaker and mother but the difference in my household is my husband’s NEVER expects and will always help with everything plus does all the cooking at the weekends 😊
@@fey9915 I get the impression Felipe’s ego needs to self-define as this great, all-knowing, always correct, protective and admirable ruler of his realm and all the serfs in it….
Part of me wants to be this woman who cooks fresh meals and bakes and cleans and organises my home and uses white vinegar for everything and another part of me wants the business woman jet setter life ... but currently I'm typing this comment whilst working from home eating a bowl of grapes in a night gown
I am both. I work 3 days a week as a part time waitress to make extra income, I’m home With my son all days of the week, home at night the 4 nights I don’t work. I cook, bake, clean, my partner helps as well with everything. We’re both happy this way
Yes. Housewives/SAHM should be paid wages imo (stopped at 1 child to not incentivise bums obviously) Doing this won’t necessarily solve the inflation crises with most homes now needing 2 incomes in order to buy them but at least it would enable those who wish to be stay at home parents and not forcing them into work, as well as acknowledgement that parenting and child raising can be tough work if you’re doing it right. If feminisms goal wasn’t to break down nuclear family and for more corporations and government to get money from women workers taxes, then why haven’t they paid stay at home parents yet?
Womens movement was not about forcing mothers back into the workforce, it was about giving women a choice and equality in the workplace irregardless of marital status or how many children lived in their home. If you want to have children and paid employment for whatever reason, two full time jobs that should be your choice as is it a choice to have children and stay home to care for them whatever your circumstances. Option 3 is dont have any children, dedicate your life to a carear or philanthropic works or academia - whatever suits you without being held back based on being born female It is a government agenda to devalue the role of at home parents. This mother also home schooled her children. She was no academic slouch, do not disrespect her choices. Why should she hold down two jobs ? I dont think she is a beaten down woman she had found what works for her and her family Most women who have children do not return to their previous career anyway. They work less hours or take lower paid jobs so they are still not on an equal footing as their male counterparts and that is still a choice.
There is no way anyone is totally respectful of their spouse at all times, but at least he’s striving towards it instead of leaning more into the world and less into the word.
I watched this and nothing he said was disrespectful of HER, it was that of her OPINION and viewpoint. And that should absolutely be allowed. Shes disheartened they’re not more pro-feminist. Trying to make something beautiful and traditional that, it appears to be working for them by making them happy and producing positive results, into something sinister and twisted, which it is clearly not.
For context regarding Felipe's "hoop earrings" comment: In the US, latino girls who wore hoop earrings were considered "trashy". He was definitely being flippant with Stacey
I found that very rude. Stacy handled it with tons of grace ( funny enough that’s exactly what trad wives are to embody “feminine grace”) This couple kinda lacks people skills actually. A bit awkward and judgmental. Stacy was so kind , open and genuinely curious.
As a Brit I know the reference it was incredibly rude to comment so blatantly remark on something he disapproves of. His wife is traditional, Stacey is not, don't apply you standards to someone else, they are coming from a different place for different reasons. If you can hate them, so don't get them.
I think the key thing here is that these 'trad wives' have actively chosen this lifestyle. It is because it suits them and calls to them personally (and the fact that they are offered a choice in the first place is purely thanks to their feminist forebears) that they have found happiness. I worry for their children who are being raised with deliberate constraints to push them towards these 'traditional' roles. It seems they, as women, have benefitted from feminism and have made the choice to live a more 'traditional' life but are neglecting to give the same choice to their own children.
Ill tell you from a kid who was raised by a trad wife and who was expected to give up her career and education when she had her first child. I tried to be something I wasnt and was miserable. I ended up divorced and am still in therapy. Females deserve CHOICE, including female children. We grow up........
Being a SAHM is a full time job. Many husbands realize this and chip in around the house with wash, cooking, and cleaning. Why should a woman work 16 hours a day, but their husbands day ends when he leaves his job. That would be the day my husband would tell me what to wear. I find it horrific that a child is made to carry something on their back for misbehaving.
The rock carrying is extreme imo as well. I don't even think the lesson they're trying to teach can resonate with a child at that age they're just going to remember that with resentment. I think the context that really matters is what constitutes as "misbehaving". Young children need to be guided with appropriate consequence for action, yes, but a parent needs to seek to understand why their child is doing certain things to help them navigate for next time, not just stifle them with physical punishment whenever they make mistakes. Mistakes are good, it's when we learn.@@beehungry6190
I mean, the fact that she says, “we used to argue all of the time and then I became a trad wife and now we get along so well.” 😳 Right, because before you were partners and equals - you expected more of him and voiced your opinions and ideas. Now you just obey so of course you get along! It’s the same as being a powerless child. He has all of the power and you go along with it - I do understand that with the trad movement you go back to simple and well defined gender roles which can lower stress in the relationship temporarily. It’s just all so gross, women going back to being domestic slaves. Totally against this movement! And I’m a married, mom of 4 who has stayed home most of the time we’ve been married. My life could look traditional, but it’s not. My husband and I are equals and partners.
Ditto here re 4 kids and traditional looking. I agree with what you said. I would go crazy if I had to bend and appease my husband all the time for the sake of peace. Although I'm sure he wishes I would sometimes.😀
I don’t see it that way. Many marital conflicts come from a place of not really knowing where they fit into the relationship. Well defined roles can help with conflict in the sense that each party knows what their place is and they respect the other for their respective roles. That is, of course, so long as each party respects the other and doesn’t manipulate or abuse their position. She seems comforted by his leadership role - not every woman would, but it works for her.
I was trained to command in the military, was a leader in my civilian life, and now I am a tradfiancée and will become a tradwife on my wedding day in September. As a leader, I have always hated shared power, which I call the "double-headed hydra" or "multiple-headed hydra". It is inefficient and causes mistakes and disputes among leaders. I clearly stated to my then-to-be fiancé that there would be only one leader in the home, and that would certainly not be me. He was already a very good leader and recognized as such by everyone. He had to get used to being taken care of, and so did I. We really love our masculine-feminine dynamic. We are incredibly benevolent towards one another and we love it.
@@user-wc5lq8fc4b You don't have to bend and appease him all the time. You only have to offer him the ability to choose whatever (what to eat for dinner, what color he would like in a room, what he would like to do in the weekend...) and let him decide. He will often return the favor out of gratitude. When there's a debate between you, let him think about it and decide. It is generally not really important anyway. He'll often bend your way too on his own accord, just to make you happy. The difference is, when he does things your way, he will do it to please you out of gratitude, not because you nagged him or won the fight. This dynamic changes the relationship altogether.
Just the opposite. I married during a time they describe as women suddenly being given the opportunity to work outside the home. That isn't how it really was. The feminists were shouting that we were being oppressed and forced to live as slaves to the man. Many, many, many husbands embraced that movement and began pressuring wives to leave the home once children were in school (some wanted them out of the home sooner). They would be telling the wives that if only they were out there working it would ease the family's finances, relieve the husband of some of his burdens, allow her to enjoy the excitement of life outside the home, enable them to go on better vacations, not have to budget so much, enable them to get a boat. Do you realize how many men in the 60s and 70s were able to get a boat once those men shoved their wives into the workforce? Then the women realized they were still expected to do everything they used to do while still putting in a ft job outside the home. Their husband was getting the benefits of higher income without any extra work. Then he started resenting the fact that his wife didn't support or respect him like she used to who hade him prone to even more affairs. The wife began to resent him because he wasn't helping even though she was putting in all those hours away from home. Higher divorce rates, lat hkey kids and on and on. Feminism has done little for women other than tear families apart and make us bitter. The younger generations didn't see that because they grew up in broken homes and all the misplaced values and distinction where the only important one is self. So now that some of them are getting the opportunity to see a life that is something other than a chaotic mess they are seeing some of the value of a more traditional lifestyle.
A lot of people including these trad wives dont understand that its normal to have different roles and SAME VALUE in marriage. You dont have to be submissive at all. Mutual respect would do just fine.
he's a narc - my thought exactly right at the moment he commented on her hoop earrings. It made her self-conscious, which is exactly why they make such curveball comments.
Even as a man, I find the notion of a trad wife abhorrent. It seems like the start of coercive control or a sense of being less worthy at the very least. Nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom and if husband goes out to work it’s fair the mom does majority of household chores. However not okay to allow husband to make all decisions and behave as if he is the big I am.
@@gggumdrop3335you can still lead a good life without the husband having total control over wife and family. It totally undermines her as a autonomous person. If you love someone why would you want to dominate them like that?
@@user-gf1xg5zd9l Does this man look like he abuses his wife? I think you are losing the definitions of words to that of feelings. Some people DO devalue others to make them feel "powerful", of course. I don't see that here. All I see is a successful family. Look to the other video Stacey posted with the family that has an 8 yr old that cannot even read and then look at these kids. Who is "dominating" in the way you define? I would say its the parents of the child that cannot read. They are more controlling than these parents.
Thank you for saying that as a man. I am I suppose a trad wife in that I am a stay at home mum but our relationship looks nothing like this. We are equals, with equal say and equal status and with none of those religious overtones nor home schooling which I find kind of cultish including the sensoring of outside influences and method of disciplining. Women being open to becoming a trad wives need to choose very carefully because as you wisely point out it could be a slippery slope to coercive control and abuse.
🤯 The woman is been brainwashed or influenced to believe her rol is “to be a stay-at-home-mom” (SAHMs) but, it seems easy and acceptable for her, been a stay-at -home-parent. 😢😜 What a lifestyle ¡!
I’m a stay at home mom but definitely not a trad wife. I talk a lot and dress comfortably and he cleans too lol ❤🙌🏼 I am myself and he loves me for me.
Red flag alert: We had a lot of disagreements at the beginning and it was unpleasant at the time ...if I was just less REBELLIOUS!!! (yes Lilien it was unpleasant because you are not an argumentative person and you just decided to submit instead of living in conflict because that selfish guy won't budge) Tumble dryer as a gift for christmas! He chooses her clothes and that woman dares to say she has her own faculties?...Massive red flags with this guy. He created his stepford wife and he didn't even need a robot to replace her. Good on his colleague for criticizing his outdated behaviour. ..Lilien if things go south, just remember that those ugly feminists have women shelter still open for you.
His wife is an adult and says she loves him. She also says he appears manly this way to her. What is your point? Stop judging and trying to separate people who look happy in their union@@kaydiangel2445
I was a housewife for 20 years. Wouldn't change a thing. Raising my kids and making our house a home was worth every sacrifice. My kids are grown now and I have had a great career in medicine for the last 10 years. Still the family manager.
I’ve been a housewife for 28 years. I’ve always wanted to be a stay at home mother. I never wanted to send my children to daycare and have strangers raising them. We have 5 children and I’m lucky that he has a great job and we can afford for me to stay home. The house is always clean, dishes and laundry always done. He works hard and deserves to come home to dinner on the table. I enjoy doing it and he’s never demanded these things from me.
@lisatroni677 looks to me you've reached your goal of carrying on the bs nonsense. Its sad because it pits woman who choose to care for their families and those who choose to be full time career women against each other. Most of us watching are LUCKY to live in a world where as women we get to choose to do one, the other or both in a lifetime. I'd continue this but I've got dishes to do.
@@JustDiane71 A nice home and a family are the best thing you can have. In the long run people who don’t have family and would rather earn money will be more unhappy when they get old.
Watching this actually made me so so sad 😞 “Basically I trained myself to like it and deal with it” WTF!? I actually hope she makes it out of there with her beautiful children, who is also been controlled and to some degree abused by been forced to march with heavy books or rocks in a bag for discipline?! I honestly feel sick 🤢
@@lenaannis8787well at my house we are committed Christians however grace is involved. I would need to understand better what they are doing. It sounded a bit alarming to me as well. After all, Christ took on the cross for us so that we don’t have to carry that punishment. We can’t possibly make up for our “sin”. We ask for forgiveness and yes, there are natural consequences at times. Taking away watching TV is discipline enough. The backpack thing is quite intense. Perhaps they will change how they do things with that after watching this.
My biggest concern about the “tradwife” life is when do you get a day off? When do you get to take a break? Do you get sick days!! The husband works out of the house. He works 8-9 hours 5 days a week, then his job ends…the wife/mom role is 24/7 always on call. That’s the part that seems SO unfair to me. When we are both at home, it would be awesome for both parents/spouses to take on all duties (cooking, picking up, getting kids to bed)
Did you not notice he was carrying around the baby a lot? He talks sweet about his wife. She serves him well. He adores her deeply. She is his queen. If she is sick, he orders pizza or something along those lines. He is her husband. He loves her. Sheesh. 🙄 Why do people act like tradwives are all abused. Most of us are not. We are spoiled by our loving husbands who take extremely good care of us. I was sick, so after working a 10 hour shift, my Husband went to the store after work, got stuff to make healthy soup, and came home and made me soup. That is 99.9% of tradwives. That's what happens. He says, "Baby, you rest if you're sick. Take a nap if you need to. Take a break off you need to. Make sure you're drinking enough water and eating enough protein." Etc I am precious to him. I treat him well and serve him well and he treats me like a queen. No boss is gonna treat a woman that way. You are easily replaced at work, but not so much by your husband and children. Please stop looking at us like we're poor, brainwashed, abused women.
@@shelleyroper588 Well, Shelley, that may be how it happens in your household, but Lillian admitted that in THEIR home, she would have to ask her husband’s permission to not make dinner if she wasn’t feeling up to it. Queen my pretty ass….🤨
I grew up in a traditional christian household. My dad is the head of our family, my mother is the one that manages the house and everything. It was nice, because my parents had attention for me and themselves. It makes me feel balanced now that I am grown up. I grew up in a loving family, there was always a parent right at my side when I needed it, we talked a lot, played together and have fond memories. Mind you, my mum had a giant carreer, multiple master degrees as well. But she decided for herself to stay home. When I became a teenager she worked for 12 hours a week, because She didn’t need to tend after me so much. Nowadays she is still our household manager. Your family reminds me of mine. My parents are still happily in love after 30 years, they take time for each other and share everything. But, I have a carreer of my own as a musician, and in the future I want to combine this with having kids. Staying home would make me go crazy I think. But it can change, it is all possible. In these days everyone has a free choice in how they do their family life, let’s be nice to each other and respect each other.. Lillian reminds me of my mum, and they seem like a very happy family. The kids are well-behaved and so cute. God bless you all!
I think there is a difference between staying home because you want to and then being this level of "tradwife". Also, my child was a ridiculously obedient child. Why? I have no idea but I do know it's not because she carried heavy rucks on her back while marching. That punishment is not okay.
Auch this man does not know that he is teaching his children they are only a worth of being here if they are good enough. Very dangerous as the children will need outside circumstances to feel worthy of being here
This is absolutely insane to me. First of all I literally laughed out loud when she associated the word masculine with him. And second if she really thought that if she made more money she would go out and try to find another woman so that he wasn’t in that role anymore, what the hell is the point of being married?? Everything about this literally just stinks
This absolutely breaks my heart. And the mom says so many things with such a forced smile. I hope she finds someone else who allows her to speak up and make her own decisions, like not making dinner every single day no matter how she feels. UGH shame on this man.
This is what it was like in the 1950's, housewives with their "mother's little helpers". My mother wanted nothing more than to have children and be a housewife but found herself isolated and depressed. Having an outside job was fulfilling in addition to being a housewife even though it wasn't a financial necessity. My childhood best friend's mother found her fulfillment in having a 20 year affair while still being devoted to her husband. I experienced my mother's depression and never wanted anything to do with either life style.
1. If the Vicar had an issue with the language, and gave a DISCLAIMER, then he understands the power of words first off, and as he says archaic. 2. The issue I have, is this puts these women in such a dangerous position. To not have the independence to work and have their own money. She has an “allowance”. To me this kind of lifestyle is a breeding ground for predators to hurt or abuse their wife. 3. You can stay home. You can honor your husband, be the primary caregiver to the children without this archaic parts to this. You can be submissive without being a doormat. This is terrifying. Terrifying for the women who have no safety net in place if they need to get out. I am just more scared for the kind of men who will use this “lifestyle” to hurt women, because they also will only be surrounded by other women who live this lifestyle.
100%. Even the religious ones tend to pick and choose how they want to live. Usually they will remind the wife of her RELIGIOUS duty towards her husband whilst arrogantly ignoring his own duty towards her (talking from experience of seeing this first hand) which is why I'm downright refusing to be a tradwife. I just don't give a damn. Would rather be no-ones wife or a single mother than someone who thinks submission is the key to a happy marriage.
I think that arrangement can work really well but it 90% depends on the personalities of the couple and how controlling the husband is. Lillian and Felipe seem like a really good mix as he appears to be pretty chilled and respects Lillian and praises her (she's trained singer) - I think if you were married to a domineering aggressive pig it would be a whole different thing.
This is only what you see on camera. The fact that Felipe chose to make that comment about Stacey’s hoop earrings at the beginning of the video is just totally unnecessary and quite disrespectful.
That’s the same thing with any marriage at all, you can be in a completely modern setup where both people are expected to work full time and outsource childcare still have an aggressive, mean, controlling husband or wife.
Couples should have whatever dynamic works for them. The one caveat I would add for stay at home partners is have a skill or something that can earn you money should you need to. If something were to happen to your spouse/partner it provides a safety net for you. It also reduces the risk of being caught in an abusive relationship.
Exactly, people have a habit of seeing a successful traditional couple and automatically thinking that its like that for everyone. As someone who grew up in a very conservative family where most women were housewives, I can tell you that this couple on our screens is most definitely part of the minority. I'm glad they look happy, but in my own family I never saw a happy traditional housewife. Their husbands were flawed beyond belief. Everything from cheating to domestic violence, to unfairness, addictions, forcing the wife to uproot and leave everything behind to follow him everywhere even though she didn't want to... have all been scenarios in my family. Ideally the husband respects his wife and her wishes but many times they let the power of him controlling the purse strings get to their head.
As you get older you realise you have experienced a slice of history, I am now 60 and can remember the 1970s when there was talk about feminism but it was often speculative. Germain Greer talked a lot but never had children and a career , it was theoretical , appropriately being an academic. But a lot of my generation actually did it, you then realise that rising pressure from employers radically reduced family time if both parents worked. And there are huge childcare costs. Especially since it’s after tax money, after school clubs , paying people to pick up and drop off etc. So you wind up paying a lot of the money to other people to do what you want to do. Also this social change stoked the housing market since there was a larger working population, so we all ended up with huge mortgages. Many people of my age may disagree, but if your in your 70,s or older and are a great advocate of the social change in the 1980s and 1990s try talking to my generation first, we actually lived it. I would add that my wife earns more than I do, I think women should have full access to education and careers, but don’t be deluded there is a cost.I stopped employed work for three years for this reason (I did some business development work for my wife’s firm from home). My message is you can try having it “all” but it won’t work, there will a shortfall elsewhere. I think a lot of younger people will adapt the feminist theories of the 70s. Because they have significant gaps.
Thats how I was raised by my christian parents. I did everything I was supposed to but that didn't prevent him from cheating and trying to kill us. Im now a divorced single mom and will never encourage my kids to do what I did.
This sounds massively unhealthy for everyone involved. To have a healthy relationship, my view is that you must be an equal team. You should benefit from your spouse’s ideas and grow. A “yes” woman is not going to help anyone grow.
I think it was extremely inhospitable to say he was counting down the days! He's , they're LUCKY they got to do this with such an awesome, talented, kind hearted star!❤
Awww so sweet! As someone with a masters myself I also agree that equality does not mean both have to work and then both have to do house chores, we can design our lives whatever way we want! As long as a relationship is built on respect both ways any approach can work!
I don't see a problem here. This seems to be a very healthy marriage in which their roles are mutually agreed upon. They're not harming anyone. The idea of women who want to be housewives doesn't have to mean an abusive old-fashioned scenario, it can be done very respectfully. If it's not for you then fine, but just live and let live.
@@aurevoiralex how are they harming the kids? We all know school/ high school is the place where the kids pick up bad behaviour and get into bad surroundings. I think homeschooling is something we should all try to do to protect our kids until we can
I’m torn. I see your point, But… Not sure how respectful it is to say “my wife has many opionions, is free to voice them, however I ultimately decide cause i am the man”. Sure it’s agreed upon now. But what if one day, she actually needs or dare I say wants to make a decision herself?
I think expecting dinner on time or house being spotless when he comes back from work is not right, as the woman is also doing house chores and taking care of the kids as well. You can’t expect her to be a super woman and juggle everything 🙄. Unless of course you have a luxury life where you have nannies and all you have to do is pamper yourself and be a woman of leisure.
@@arthurfleck8777 hmm something tells me you haven’t looked after 3 young children all day everyday on your own, as well as doing all the cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. On top of that she is homeschooling her children and she has a young baby so is probably up multiple times in the night to feed and woken up early in the morning by the kids. Then she also has to make herself look beautiful for her husband and provide meals for him…
You can be a feminist and choose traditional gender roles in your relationship, or be a housewife. The point of feminism is that women are able to choose for themselves and have equal human rights. I don't see why they have to be so preachy at other people?
Choice feminism is not meeting the requirement. Feminism is a movement to liberate women, and not every woman’s choice furthers this goal. She should be free to live her life but it is not feminism at all. Also her husband is an engineer and would probably be a menace to women at his workplace, not respecting their authority or make degrading comments.
@@annaboulderco THANK YOU. Do what you want but I am not sure how that is a feminist decision. Being a housewife is also not a feminist choice but one can be a feminist and a housewife and raise strong children, whether they are feminist or not.
@annanoulderco So basically feminism is not down to what the woman wants but you TELLING her what she wants? Makes you wonder where the term feminazi comes from . .
I love this comment especially the last part because alot of ppl preach their narrative to u and say u have to do this or be ostracised when feminism should be for women to choose what they want for themselves and be free and happy doing that without judgement.
I love being a housewife and a mother to my two girls. I'm constantly asked 'when are you going back to work' or... 'so what are your plans when the girls are in school?'. Before being a housewife I was so aimless and miserable, now I have a purpose and I feel whole.
Stacey is gorgeous! When the husband made the comment about Stacey's realigns a) he admiring her beauty but b) he was manifesting his natural desire to tell women what clothes they should wear and of course Stacey was having none of it even subconsciously. The card wife dynamic is a little like sm in the one of giving up one's power to one's partner. The obvious drawback is that the woman has nothing to fall back on if the relationship doesn't work out. The husband comes across as a bit smug and Napoleon complexish.
As a feminist, I'm totally cool with people living like this. In fact it brings me genuine joy seeing people so happy with their way of living. It becomes an issue for me when they're crapping on feminism, LGBTQ, and ways of living different than theirs. Or if they raise kids with fear and complete and unconditional obedience (obviously not saying they do that)
theyre definitely brainwashing their children.. im surprised they were able to admit and air on tv that they make their children carry around a bag of heavy items as punishment. it should be illegal to homeschool your children and completely isolate them from the world and treat them like this. its definitely fear and unconditional obedience
I am pretty sure the husband is a misogynist and she as well, because of how they view the roles of women and men. Imagine being his female coworker. They can live their lives, but they see women as lesser than men period. How can a feminist support that
Anyone who has stayed home to run a household and raise three kids knows how challenging it is. Choosing to tackle that role does not diminish the tackler in any way. Freedom of choice is vital in any free society. No one should criticize another person’s choice, or their right to change their mind eventually according to changing circumstances.
That’s not the issue. Anyone is allowed to chose how their family works. The issue is that she is verbally told that her role is less equal to her husband’s and her husband has the final say in all decisions. I do most of these tasks in my marriage too but it would never be wrong of me to ask my husband to do the laundry or clean the dishes, whereas in this relationships it is. She has specific expectations to meet which are decided by her husband. She doesn’t have the liberty to relax in her own home.
@@milliekirk maybe she aknowladges the fact that her husband works all week to provide for the family, and he cant tell his boss he isnt going to do tasks, maybe she uses her tasks at home and CHOOSES not to say no as symbolism to show that she understands his struggles at work and its her way of supporting him. just like he supports her freedom to be at home and not wasting her life at work. they are religious after all and symbolism plays a huge part in religion. hence his kids punishment is wearing a rucksack and marching because of jesus or whatever they said also we dont know that if she had a genuine reason he would be fine and take over, we havent seen that or it wasnt discussed, she even said, "if dinners late are you punished?" "no"
Criticising peoples choices is very fair. She can do what she wants but she is out there online trying to recruit people to her cause. So she opens herself up for that 100 percent
I'm so torn on this. On the one hand I feel that a core aspect of feminism is to respect the choices of all women, including those who choose to adopt traditional gender roles in the home. There are absolutely women out there who are more than happy with this kind of lifestyle, and I applaud those for having the drive and desire to run the home and raise the children. My own mum has always been a housewife, dedicating her life since motherhood to do just that. I've seen first hand how much time, work and effort goes into this kind of role, and I'm so grateful to have had my mum available to me 24 hours a day. The other half of me feels immediately anxious at the thought of being subservient to another person, as well as being an unpaid cleaner and teacher in my own home. The thought of not earning my own money, never having a meal cooked for me, and never being able to take a break from the monotony of the home is horrifying to me. My opinion is that in order for any partnership to survive and thrive, there needs to be balance and compromise. My dad earned the money, my mum ran the home, but by God has my dad always known who the real boss of the house is and that he wouldn't last a week without her.
100% agree! Although I'm a SAHM now, I basically collect a 'salary' for myself every month that goes into my account. Kind of like pocket money on steroids 🤪🤣. Makes me.feel.more independent. I believe you can adapt your relationship and lifestyle to whatever feels right for you ❤️
What I dont understand nowadays, is how I you follow tradition or previous " social norms " you are often critised by those who don't. I am not saying some things are choices rather than a natural existence e.g. homosexuality, before people start jumping on Me. What I'm saying is, it's OK to be gay, bi, trans, gender fluid, non binary, black, feminist.... etc etc and I 100% agree, however, it now seems taboo to be straight, white,male,tradwife etc. Surely the fight is for equality not a reversal of prejudice? One thing I HATE I being referred to as " cis" I don't have an issue with a person referring to me as a person who identifies as the same gender as that I was born, but I do not like terminology being bestowed on me by others that are not. I would not refer to a person as a " tranny" unless that is how they chose to be referred to so why would it be OK for someone to slide a label I find offensive on me?
@@georginacat7667 Thank you so much for making that point. I was born a girl, and I grew up to be a woman and throughout all the years, I was also female. That is how I identify, and how I choose to identify. If we, or even just I, support others having their choice of identity label respected, I would also like mine respected. And yes, there is something that feels like a reverse prejudice when I am referred to as "cis". I don't know the origin of the term, but to me it feels like a term that wasn't coined by someone living as the gender they were identified as at birth. It feels like I am being identified as "other", and in some situations there is also a feeling of being regarded as somehow inferior. So please don't call me "cis".
Yeah but noone is forcing you to do any of that, that you so dread. just obviously dont go for a guy that wants a trad wife lol. Sorry to break it to you but if your dad hadnt met your mum or had his children he would be just fine im sure. That "wouldnt last a week" statement is very silly and inacurate and actually is a very negative dig at your dad and his ability to survive on earth without a woman. I infact dread the whole relationship life, to think just because im a man i shouldnt be cooking at home, cleaning, decorating, deciding what furnature can go where. To have my whole style, expression and taste relegated to a dingy celler or tiny closet under the stairs (which seems to be the trend lately) or freazing cold uninsulated garden shed, labelled a "man cave" to make me feel better about it, or in your dads case (speaking from experiance here) having to come home to an overimposing personality in the home being told what to do and what goes where and how im doing everything wrong, being told what i can and cant spend my hard earned money on yet the wife buys some more tea towels when we already have 5 because "they match the kitchen" which i hate the look of anyway. being told where to sit on "his favourate chair" and only real purpose is to go to work to bring home the money. but its all ok and normalised because its dressed up in "cute" (actually quite abusive) little statements like "im the real boss of the home" and "he wouldnt last a week without me" and "you dont have decorting style" or "real men dont care about furnature and what colour the kitchen is" Hats off to you for recognising that trad wifes still deserve the respect of femininst as the whole point of feminism was about equal oppertunitys and for women to have the choice of what they want to do. I was very dissapointed in holly willoughbys interview with the trad wife and how she tried to make out that the wife was somehow being controlled by her husband and letting down the side of feminism. (not sure if you have seen that interview)
You can get a PhD and then decide not to pursue a career and start a family and dedicate yourself to that instead! Either path way is as valid and as beautiful and rewarding ❤ I also totally agree with the aspect of the parenting about reduction of television and homeschooling. Such tiny little impressionable brains. I grew up with unrestricted access to screens and internet as a child and it definitely exposed me to the world too hard and too fast for me to handle. I’m also neurodivergent and so if I have bio kids (I won’t because I’m going to be sterilised) but if I had a wife who was neurodivergent our children would probably be neurodivergent too and the modern education system completely failed and still fails our wonderful beautiful neurodivergent kiddos. Homeschool is such a safe and healthy environment.
@@fredarcher7264 because In the 21st century we are given so many opportunities to find things for ourselves like religion beliefs politics and by that we can decide what we do believe rather than following our parents
I was born in 1963, where my father was the boss. As a child, I very much noticed my mom not having much input for major purchases. It was always my dad’s choice. She went to work when I turned 6, so she would have money to buy things she wanted. When I was in my teenage years, I decided I would not let any man tell me what to do. Watching my mom not being able to voice her opinion. I had boyfriends through out my life, but I feel growing up the way I did, totally changed my view about marriage. I am now 61 and only married at 53. Oh, mom started really voicing her opinions when my brother and I was no longer was at home.
Well! Imagine my surprise when I realized I was a Tradwife! I did this for 10 years! It just didn’t work out for us beyond that because my husband (now ex) was a narcissist. He had such a tight grip on my life that it was almost impossible for me to get away from him. Had he not forced me to go back to work, I would have died as a Tradwife.
The worst is their narrowmindedness. Not accepting feminism, punishing their kids for naughtiness with carrying something heavy like Jesus...That's the real danger. Nothing wrong with being a housewife! If he decides to leave her she has nothing. He can probably have other women and she wouldn't be allowed to say anything. I'm wondering if there are Tradwives out there without any religious background...
What possible benefit is there in depriving your kids of knowing the real world by homeschooling? It won't stop what's going on out there that you don't like but will certainly leave your children unprepared for it. Felipe has Svengali tendencies that he needs to look into.
Thank you for this comment!! Home schooling is extremly overrated! Two master degrees of this mother were just waste of time and her parents money. Basic social skills and simply joy of time you share with other students is taken away from these kids at the start 😔😒
My youngest daughter has decided, of her own volition, decided to be more of a "trad" wife. I'm totally bemused by this as I'm anything but, and she was brought up in a single parent feminist household. Everyone to their own obviously and I like her partner, and no he's not a bigoted dominator
We have to live and let live. That's why I disagree with these NGOs who go into faraway countries and try to educate the wives to be more independent and that they can be the bread winner if they choose -- that kind of thing can upset traditional societies and cause havoc.
@@annother3350 What are women in those societies supposed to do if their husband dies before the kids have reached adulthood? Remarry a few days after his death?
@@andrewjones575 Perhaps the extended family helps but it's completely not up to us to decide for them if people are generally happy in these societies.
I have been a housewife (don't like the name tradwife, seems a derogatory term) all my life... loved it, I was in base camp as we called, it, the kids knew someone was home all the time... but my hubby of 39 years was a and still is a treasure... he helped with anything I asked, or not asked. TEAM work, it works :)
That's cool. Did your husband brainwash your and did you have to mentally trick yourself into enjoy doing the washing, cooking cleaning though? Some woman want to be a house wife and that's fantastic. But if have to trick yourself into laundry being your favourite chore and always smile and pretend that everything is fantastic like this lady there's a difference.
I had a summer seasonal job where I worked 10 hours a day which was exhausting and then was at home for 6 months in the winter taking care of my home, husband and children, my kids would hate it when I returned to work in the summer months and counted the days in the Autumn for my finish date! I loved my job but felt guilty that things at home slipped and my kids were neglected and equally adored my winters just being a mum, cooking lovely meals, baking and doing things with my family! Ask my kids and they would say they preferred me at home with them for sure! I don't think we have equality, I think most of us struggle to find a balance!
I feel so blessed to be a SAHM. My baby is 5 months and its a beautiful experience and i am currently 3 months pregnant again. My partner looks after me in providing and i look after him by running the household for us. It works so well for us and our baby. I had a lengthy career in construction before and made good money but this job of being a mother is 100x better and more important. Not everyone has this option but i think for very young children it is so important for the mother to be with them.
Ugh! "Submit and obey your husband!" He's just one more guy on the planet? Why should she feel he is her own personal God?! These sound like tenants from a cult. How awful (and dangerous), for one to do :(
He certainly didn’t appeal to me as he came across as very controlling. My mother was a housewife but she had far more freedom than this woman appears to have. Anyway each to their own!
I've watched your reaction videos and it was nice to see the family behind it. People seem to focus on the woman losing out by staying home, but not so much the man who goes out to work, to build a career and an income to pay for the home, heat, light, food and clothing and deal with the stress of that. Felipe said it's in a man's DNA to provide and protect which I agree with. I watched a video recently asking men and women who should make the sacrifice if a couple were told one must die. ALL the men said they should die and the woman should live. ALL the women said the man should give up his life for them. This is what men do and we're not celebrated for that. My view is live your life the way you want. You seem a very happy family.
Finally. Great comment. The Bible says a man is to lay down his life for his wife. Nobody makes shows about that, as if it's nothing. But a loving respecting wife is an issue. Weird world. God bless!
@@HBudianu It's not respect, when you pretend to be less than another & try to propagate that to others. It's like "submissive" black people started slavery again, under nice masters, who treat them well. Just creepy & bound to go south as an experiment on a larger scale.
From the outside looking in people might think I would agree with this. I’m a Conservative Catholic stay-at-home mom. I used to homeschool. But I find the “Trad Wife” movement very troubling. I can say as a mom of 3 children that has also homeschooled that she absolutely must be exhausted keeping the house super clean, homeschooling, and taking care of the kids. On top of that she is dressing up for it. This looks more like a short term performance than daily life. The problem with “trad wife” ideals are that they seem to focus on only one half of what is written in Ephesians. The movement forgets that in return for “submission” the husband is supposed to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. He is supposed to be humble and even willing to die for the good of his wife. That means being very attuned to her needs and feelings. When the whole of the passage is read to include the expectations for the husband, there is no room for a man with an ego. I feel most of the people that love the “trad wife” movement are chasing a caricature of femininity and trying to pass it off as a tradition. But both Ephesians and Proverbs 31 run very counter to the narrow definition of “tradition” in this modern “trad” movement. It is okay to have very set roles. It is okay to be a stay-at home mom. But it is not okay to set standards that are not in alignment with long term reality.
my mum was what you could call a 'trad wife'. My dad had serious mental health problems, lost his job and became an alcoholic. My sister and I grew up in a pretty messy environment, was all its lasting effects, as she didn't have the finances or confidence to leave. Really saddens me to see this peddled out as some sort of goal for girls and women, as our rights are stripped away in supposed developed countries. So brainwashed by layers of utter BS.
Feminism doesn't take issue (or, shouldn't under most current theories) with women who choose to be housewives. It takes issue with women being subservient to their husbands. Feminism wants adults in relationships to have equal power (ie be partners in a relationship). If a woman chooses to be a housewife but is a partner with her husband, that isn't a problem. At the same time, a working woman who had to defer to her husband as the head of the household maybe wouldn't be the most feminist set up. It's about agency and equality, not the division of labor.
My sister is one of these. While there are many housewives and househusbands in the world, tradwife is something different entirely. I've come to learn they are all narcissists who turn what ordinarily is a humble, selfless way of life with no adulation or fanfare into something that feeds their egos
You are just jealous on your sisters happiness, while you at work are pushed around by your own boss, and too exhausted to take good care of your children when you come home.
@@jolin8493 I feel very sorry for women in this day and age, its the feminist indoctrination of our women that caused her to be "pushed around by your own boss, and too exhausted to take good care of your children" its very sad. as a man who has worked 40hours a week since i was 15, it is NOT something I would tell our women to be striving for. you waste your whole life working to line the pockets of your boss. and we beg for holiday days so we can just relax to catch our breaths. It is the biggest lie told to our young women who waste away there youths and struggle to bring up children while chasing the femenists dream world they have invented
I’m a housewife without children and I think we should respect and accept the choices women decide to make for their lives. Regardless of progressive or traditional theres room for both types of women❤️
Horrible. So many women are trapped in a bad marriage because they are dependent on a man. He is litterally trapping her. Children are better off with parents who are seperated/divorced but can co-parent and respect eachother before parents who are unhappy and/or in a controlling relationship. Btw, my man who I'm not married to and have two children with makes about 2/3 of my salery because he has a lower paying job and works less than me. We both take care of the household and children but he does more because he works less. Strange that he hasn't cheated on me yet after 12 years because of unhappiness. Everyone choose what kind of relationship you want but to be dependent on your partner financially is always the wrong choice because this will mean that you will have no choice. You have no idea where life takes you and this guy is showing strong signs of disrespect towards women who doesn't act the way he likes. A commited relationship or being married is a partnership and that means equality and respect.
As a feminist, I have no issue with a woman *choosing* to become a SAHM/W. That is the point of the belief system. This family seems nice, but I can see the purposeful isolation and evangelical brainwashing being done here, and that is concerning.
I’m a married woman with a Husband I truly love. I’ve come to realize that women are raised to be single mothers that struggle alone. We weren’t taught how to be great partners for life. There is something to this, and I say this as a professional woman.
I was a traditional stay at home Mom already had received my Nursing degree. I am very glad I did. When the HEAD of the house became more emotionally abusive coupled with cheating I had a way out. I could survive. I in turn raised my daughter to be independent. I raised my son the same way. They can cook, clean, work and now as adults they have successful relationships! Their spouses feel appreciated and respected! Teach your children to respect themselves and have boundaries, be independent and most of all respect and appreciate their spouses .
Same. I hope my daughter never decides to be a trad wife, but if she ever does, i want to make sure she has a degree that can give her some financial security in case of emergency (and if I'm not there anymore)
@@LolaKlein I do agree that is important for women to have a back up plan. I myself got a degree while growing my family but I have never used it so not sure what use it is but luckily I have not had to find out as my husband a good, hard working, supportive man.
Say it louder for those in the back. When my ex-husband became abusive, I could support myself and my young son on my own. When I remarried, I was sure to marry someone who would be a partner, not a boss. We've split everything down the middle for nearly 33 years....earning power, childcare, housework, money, etc. Do we fight? Hell yeah....anyone with a free will is going to disagree with their partner at some point. Was it hard? Absolutely. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't cook and he doesn't scrub toilets...and I'm OK with that. We each have our strengths and we support each other. And no I don't wear lipstick while cleaning the bathroom LOL
Same for me as well. I spent 10yrs as a SAHM taking care of all the normal things but also earning my bachelors. Then, in 2020 during Covid, my husband began going off the rails with all kinds of horrible decisions along with cheating. We lost everything and I ended up in a 5th wheel with our son abandoned out at a camping ground in the middle of nowhere. While in the trailer, I spent 2021-2022 earning my masters and then my husband had a horrible accident and passed away at the beginning of 2022. I finished my grad degree 1 month after his accident. I was able to get my son and I out of that situation and into a 1 bedroom apartment then found a wonderful well paying job and now we’re in a really nice 2bedroom apartment making 6 figures. I’m hoping to buy a house in the next year. Without my degrees, I think my son and I would be in a really bad place. I literally thank God everyday for giving me the opportunity to complete my education and help us do for ourselves. I will always believe that women must have a contingency plan in place if they’re going to be dependent on their spouse just in case something goes really really wrong later on in life.
@@SString215 Hugs girl. You are truly a Phoenix!
I love that you pointed out that the objective of feminism was too allow women to make their own decisions and not become pseudomen. Some of us prefer to be working mothers (and/or economically must), and some of us prefer to be stay at home mothers. It's having the ability to choose , having the ability to pursue opportunities if we want to/must, that is important.
exactly!
Literally came to say this!
Everyone is entitled to choice. It should not be constrained by traditional models
This is the most sensible comment. As a 60 year old woman who has been married for forty years I’ve fought many fights over the years for women to have CHOICES. That’s what it boils down to. You can’t have it all, men never have. They have careers but don’t have the time with their children. It’s all about choice. I chose to be a stay at home mum, it worked for us. Neither me or my husband wear the trousers, the marriage does, it’s above us. We are now at a time in life where it’s back to just the two of us most of the time and we are having a ball.
I used to be a housewife for 5 years, now I work and I think that those 5 years were the happiest years. Don't listen to anybody who tries to impose their opinion on how your life should be like. If you want to be a housewife - do it. If you want to build a career - do it. You are the one who decides!
Exactly, live and let live. As long as there is equality in the relationship then do what makes you, your spouse and your children the happiest.
There's being a housewife........and then there's letting your husband treat you like a child, or worse.
because that is what feminism is about. CHOICES.
Well said.
But why call yourself a tradwife, instead of just a woman doing what feels best for yourself? You can still be equal and have your husband know how to cook as well..
My husband doesn’t demand respect, that is why I naturally respect him. This husband gives me the creeps because he thrives on ruling over her, a true leader naturally leads and doesn’t need to establish that. As a housewife, I couldn’t be more happy to be with my amazingly caring husband who I love to serve because he truly appreciates and loves me and lets me be my own wild self.
Exactly this. There’s a difference between housewives and trad wives. Modern housewives may stay at home, but it’s seen as a partnership of equals between a husband and wife. Trad wife relationships seem to be about power dynamics and living a caricature of a bygone era.
I feel the same way about my husband!! It’s a huge blessing and my heart breaks for women who feel like they are locked into this and their husband gets to do whatever he wants.
IMO you can't demand respect you can demand fear and submissiveness or obedience but respect is different
I think the biggest thing I dislike is the way these trad wives speak poorly about feminism. Feminism is about woman having choice and genuine equality, not dominance. As a feminist I will fight for a womans right to choose to be a housewife, those two things are not fighting against each other. The role of being a home maker can be a genuine and meaningful choice for a woman to make. If a woman is genuinely happy (and from this 40 minute look into Lillian's life she seems that she is) then go for it, but don't speak against other woman doing what makes them happy. Same goes for carer driven woman, great... but don't look down on others with different priorities.
Thank you, glad someone said this.
You are right, but the main thing is finding a good man to treat you well.
Feminist also speak poorly about traditional wives. We see more that this than vise versa in today's world so....
@@Makeachange... so the most basic thing in a relationship... jesus
As a feminist, I will fight to defend the right of any person to be a stay at home partner in a healthy relationship, but I will also fight for the right of every person to work and find fulfillment and outside of the home.
I bet you the daughter will never forget this. I hope she remembers Stacey when deciding what to do with her life and maybe being pushed in one direction by her father.
This is just like The Duggar’s but without all the children & a different religion…🤔What if Lillian is ill with the flu, will Philippe then help out his wife & kids? My Dad helped my Mom & still worked . She also worked even after she had my brother & myself. My own Hubby & I both worked & shared household responsibilities. Plus if he is ill or vice versa we both pick up the slack for one another. Does this mean that I don’t respect or love him or vice versa …Not even close. I used to work full time the same as my hubby but when I had our 2nd child I worked as a nurse per diem or even part time so I COULD be there to teach & raise the children the way I WANTED too & worked P/T because with 3 children & my Mom was ill as well as I myself had health issues. When I wanted extra income I did other jobs so I could be at home & still be with my kiddos & we still helped each other & the kids as well as had alone time & Couple time. I DID NOT HAVE OBEY in our marriage vows & he said he wouldn’t want them to be in there. We are still married after 31 years. We both respect & love each other & our children were brought up w/o stereotypical roles. Whether you are a Girl or a boy you should teach your child how to cook, clean,do laundry , fix things around the home & do basics in your car. ( how to change a tire, change oil etc) as well as how to BUDGET, Food shop etc . The budget & how to do the bills were a taboo subject for my generation. This was a negative in my opinion. You be your own person, whether you’re married, single, have children or none at all. Just be happy & remember FAMILY & Friend’s ARE Important.
Even if she’s homeschooled she’ll still have opportunities to meet lots of different people in her life.
Yes Stacy may have changed her life
She has an Asian background and he has a Latin background so it seems they are living up to what parents or grandparents would've said is acceptable
OMG when she said "less rebellious." I gasped out loud. This is cult behavior.
I LOOOOOVVVEEE being a homemaker and mother but the difference in my household is my husband’s NEVER expects and will always help with everything plus does all the cooking at the weekends 😊
That's a good situation.
So you're part time Tradwife? :P
What is he a chef? When does he get time off?
@@bradtalksforengland You never get time off from looking after your family
Exactly 😊 It's a partnership, carry the load together ❤️
Stacey: “so… are you a trad-husband?”
Philippe: “If you imagine a city, right, in the Middle Ages…”
God, Filipe is an obnoxious man.
Right?? Ffs 🤣🤣🤣
😂😂
Dude is a protector wall around the city. With them noodle arms and legs :D
@@fey9915 I get the impression Felipe’s ego needs to self-define as this great, all-knowing, always correct, protective and admirable ruler of his realm and all the serfs in it….
Part of me wants to be this woman who cooks fresh meals and bakes and cleans and organises my home and uses white vinegar for everything and another part of me wants the business woman jet setter life ... but currently I'm typing this comment whilst working from home eating a bowl of grapes in a night gown
The reality of most women...
I am both. I work 3 days a week as a part time waitress to make extra income, I’m home
With my son all days of the week, home at night the 4 nights I don’t work. I cook, bake, clean, my partner helps as well with everything. We’re both happy this way
You’re exactly where you should be 🍇✌️
I don't have/want children, but I feel you and my husband and I both work full-time, but I feel you so much!😂
She has three young children including a baby. She IS WORKING.
Yes. Housewives/SAHM should be paid wages imo (stopped at 1 child to not incentivise bums obviously)
Doing this won’t necessarily solve the inflation crises with most homes now needing 2 incomes in order to buy them but at least it would enable those who wish to be stay at home parents and not forcing them into work, as well as acknowledgement that parenting and child raising can be tough work if you’re doing it right.
If feminisms goal wasn’t to break down nuclear family and for more corporations and government to get money from women workers taxes, then why haven’t they paid stay at home parents yet?
Full time work plus plus plus
Womens movement was not about forcing mothers back into the workforce, it was about giving women a choice and equality in the workplace irregardless of marital status or how many children lived in their home. If you want to have children and paid employment for whatever reason, two full time jobs that should be your choice as is it a choice to have children and stay home to care for them whatever your circumstances. Option 3 is dont have any children, dedicate your life to a carear or philanthropic works or academia - whatever suits you without being held back based on being born female
It is a government agenda to devalue the role of at home parents. This mother also home schooled her children. She was no academic slouch, do not disrespect her choices. Why should she hold down two jobs ? I dont think she is a beaten down woman she had found what works for her and her family
Most women who have children do not return to their previous career anyway. They work less hours or take lower paid jobs so they are still not on an equal footing as their male counterparts and that is still a choice.
There's no way he is totally respectful, his comfortable disrespect of Stacey is a big red flag.
He's a pompous arse!
Did you see the daughter side eye when mom was talking. It's all a show.
There is no way anyone is totally respectful of their spouse at all times, but at least he’s striving towards it instead of leaning more into the world and less into the word.
I watched this and nothing he said was disrespectful of HER, it was that of her OPINION and viewpoint. And that should absolutely be allowed. Shes disheartened they’re not more pro-feminist. Trying to make something beautiful and traditional that, it appears to be working for them by making them happy and producing positive results, into something sinister and twisted, which it is clearly not.
@@kdgibbs0422He doesn’t even respect his own children. Imagine what he’s like with his wife.
For context regarding Felipe's "hoop earrings" comment: In the US, latino girls who wore hoop earrings were considered "trashy". He was definitely being flippant with Stacey
I found that very rude. Stacy handled it with tons of grace ( funny enough that’s exactly what trad wives are to embody “feminine grace”) This couple kinda lacks people skills actually. A bit awkward and judgmental. Stacy was so kind , open and genuinely curious.
As a Brit I know the reference it was incredibly rude to comment so blatantly remark on something he disapproves of.
His wife is traditional, Stacey is not, don't apply you standards to someone else, they are coming from a different place for different reasons.
If you can hate them, so don't get them.
Shame to be so needlessly insulting.
I caught on to that, here in the US "the bigger the hoop, the bigger the ho."
It's very trashy in England also
I think the key thing here is that these 'trad wives' have actively chosen this lifestyle. It is because it suits them and calls to them personally (and the fact that they are offered a choice in the first place is purely thanks to their feminist forebears) that they have found happiness.
I worry for their children who are being raised with deliberate constraints to push them towards these 'traditional' roles. It seems they, as women, have benefitted from feminism and have made the choice to live a more 'traditional' life but are neglecting to give the same choice to their own children.
Ill tell you from a kid who was raised by a trad wife and who was expected to give up her career and education when she had her first child. I tried to be something I wasnt and was miserable. I ended up divorced and am still in therapy. Females deserve CHOICE, including female children. We grow up........
Being a SAHM is a full time job. Many husbands realize this and chip in around the house with wash, cooking, and cleaning. Why should a woman work 16 hours a day, but their husbands day ends when he leaves his job. That would be the day my husband would tell me what to wear. I find it horrific that a child is made to carry something on their back for misbehaving.
Not really horrific honestly since they are well cared for. You just done agree with this type of role.
The rock carrying is extreme imo as well. I don't even think the lesson they're trying to teach can resonate with a child at that age they're just going to remember that with resentment. I think the context that really matters is what constitutes as "misbehaving". Young children need to be guided with appropriate consequence for action, yes, but a parent needs to seek to understand why their child is doing certain things to help them navigate for next time, not just stifle them with physical punishment whenever they make mistakes. Mistakes are good, it's when we learn.@@beehungry6190
I was a trad wife and it completely broke me, I was bullied into submission for years and thankfully eventually escaped
Trad wives do not get bullied, you were something else.
I mean, the fact that she says, “we used to argue all of the time and then I became a trad wife and now we get along so well.” 😳 Right, because before you were partners and equals - you expected more of him and voiced your opinions and ideas. Now you just obey so of course you get along! It’s the same as being a powerless child. He has all of the power and you go along with it - I do understand that with the trad movement you go back to simple and well defined gender roles which can lower stress in the relationship temporarily. It’s just all so gross, women going back to being domestic slaves. Totally against this movement! And I’m a married, mom of 4 who has stayed home most of the time we’ve been married. My life could look traditional, but it’s not. My husband and I are equals and partners.
Ditto here re 4 kids and traditional looking. I agree with what you said. I would go crazy if I had to bend and appease my husband all the time for the sake of peace. Although I'm sure he wishes I would sometimes.😀
I don’t see it that way. Many marital conflicts come from a place of not really knowing where they fit into the relationship. Well defined roles can help with conflict in the sense that each party knows what their place is and they respect the other for their respective roles. That is, of course, so long as each party respects the other and doesn’t manipulate or abuse their position. She seems comforted by his leadership role - not every woman would, but it works for her.
I was trained to command in the military, was a leader in my civilian life, and now I am a tradfiancée and will become a tradwife on my wedding day in September.
As a leader, I have always hated shared power, which I call the "double-headed hydra" or "multiple-headed hydra". It is inefficient and causes mistakes and disputes among leaders.
I clearly stated to my then-to-be fiancé that there would be only one leader in the home, and that would certainly not be me. He was already a very good leader and recognized as such by everyone. He had to get used to being taken care of, and so did I. We really love our masculine-feminine dynamic. We are incredibly benevolent towards one another and we love it.
@@user-wc5lq8fc4b You don't have to bend and appease him all the time. You only have to offer him the ability to choose whatever (what to eat for dinner, what color he would like in a room, what he would like to do in the weekend...) and let him decide. He will often return the favor out of gratitude.
When there's a debate between you, let him think about it and decide. It is generally not really important anyway. He'll often bend your way too on his own accord, just to make you happy.
The difference is, when he does things your way, he will do it to please you out of gratitude, not because you nagged him or won the fight. This dynamic changes the relationship altogether.
Just the opposite. I married during a time they describe as women suddenly being given the opportunity to work outside the home. That isn't how it really was.
The feminists were shouting that we were being oppressed and forced to live as slaves to the man. Many, many, many husbands embraced that movement and began pressuring wives to leave the home once children were in school (some wanted them out of the home sooner). They would be telling the wives that if only they were out there working it would ease the family's finances, relieve the husband of some of his burdens, allow her to enjoy the excitement of life outside the home, enable them to go on better vacations, not have to budget so much, enable them to get a boat. Do you realize how many men in the 60s and 70s were able to get a boat once those men shoved their wives into the workforce?
Then the women realized they were still expected to do everything they used to do while still putting in a ft job outside the home. Their husband was getting the benefits of higher income without any extra work.
Then he started resenting the fact that his wife didn't support or respect him like she used to who hade him prone to even more affairs. The wife began to resent him because he wasn't helping even though she was putting in all those hours away from home. Higher divorce rates, lat hkey kids and on and on.
Feminism has done little for women other than tear families apart and make us bitter.
The younger generations didn't see that because they grew up in broken homes and all the misplaced values and distinction where the only important one is self. So now that some of them are getting the opportunity to see a life that is something other than a chaotic mess they are seeing some of the value of a more traditional lifestyle.
A lot of people including these trad wives dont understand that its normal to have different roles and SAME VALUE in marriage. You dont have to be submissive at all. Mutual respect would do just fine.
He just comes off as a narcissist that loves his own voice and ideas. Giving a quiz about the couple when he is part of the couple 😂
❤❤
I didn't see it as a quiz, just a lighthearted fun part of the get together. There are times people automatically jump to negativity
he's a narc - my thought exactly right at the moment he commented on her hoop earrings. It made her self-conscious, which is exactly why they make such curveball comments.
Even as a man, I find the notion of a trad wife abhorrent. It seems like the start of coercive control or a sense of being less worthy at the very least. Nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom and if husband goes out to work it’s fair the mom does majority of household chores. However not okay to allow husband to make all decisions and behave as if he is the big I am.
Why do you associate leading your family to path of a good life, being cared for and where family is always the priority as something "abhorrent"?
@@gggumdrop3335you can still lead a good life without the husband having total control over wife and family. It totally undermines her as a autonomous person. If you love someone why would you want to dominate them like that?
@@user-gf1xg5zd9l Does this man look like he abuses his wife? I think you are losing the definitions of words to that of feelings. Some people DO devalue others to make them feel "powerful", of course. I don't see that here. All I see is a successful family. Look to the other video Stacey posted with the family that has an 8 yr old that cannot even read and then look at these kids. Who is "dominating" in the way you define? I would say its the parents of the child that cannot read. They are more controlling than these parents.
Thank you for saying that as a man. I am I suppose a trad wife in that I am a stay at home mum but our relationship looks nothing like this. We are equals, with equal say and equal status and with none of those religious overtones nor home schooling which I find kind of cultish including the sensoring of outside influences and method of disciplining. Women being open to becoming a trad wives need to choose very carefully because as you wisely point out it could be a slippery slope to coercive control and abuse.
🤯 The woman is been brainwashed or influenced to believe her rol is “to be a stay-at-home-mom” (SAHMs) but, it seems easy and acceptable for her, been a stay-at -home-parent. 😢😜 What a lifestyle ¡!
I worry for his female work colleagues, because of his attitude and comments to Stacey he wouldn't respect his colleagues.
This was what I thought of too!
I was thinking the same too and the type of work environment that might be.
Domestic abuse happens when women aren't able to have financial independence. This makes me cringe.
The wife seems content but she also seems like she could put on a good face and it's possible she's borderline brainwashed
I’m a stay at home mom but definitely not a trad wife. I talk a lot and dress comfortably and he cleans too lol ❤🙌🏼 I am myself and he loves me for me.
Amen sister!
"is Philippe a misogynistic lunatic?" haha very Partridge
😂
I feel for the daughter. This seems very isolating for her.
Yes, what wonderful social skills she must be developing without interacting with her peers….
Red flag alert: We had a lot of disagreements at the beginning and it was unpleasant at the time ...if I was just less REBELLIOUS!!! (yes Lilien it was unpleasant because you are not an argumentative person and you just decided to submit instead of living in conflict because that selfish guy won't budge) Tumble dryer as a gift for christmas! He chooses her clothes and that woman dares to say she has her own faculties?...Massive red flags with this guy. He created his stepford wife and he didn't even need a robot to replace her. Good on his colleague for criticizing his outdated behaviour. ..Lilien if things go south, just remember that those ugly feminists have women shelter still open for you.
How do you know the guy is selfish? Stop judging people you do not know
Uh oh someone’s jealous 😂😂😂
@@maneshipocrates2264 because he acts selfish. He disrespects his wife and bullies her. She deserves a better husband.
His wife is an adult and says she loves him. She also says he appears manly this way to her. What is your point? Stop judging and trying to separate people who look happy in their union@@kaydiangel2445
Well said, Jackie!
I was a housewife for 20 years. Wouldn't change a thing. Raising my kids and making our house a home was worth every sacrifice. My kids are grown now and I have had a great career in medicine for the last 10 years. Still the family manager.
I’ve been a housewife for 28 years. I’ve always wanted to be a stay at home mother. I never wanted to send my children to daycare and have strangers raising them. We have 5 children and I’m lucky that he has a great job and we can afford for me to stay home. The house is always clean, dishes and laundry always done. He works hard and deserves to come home to dinner on the table. I enjoy doing it and he’s never demanded these things from me.
Good for you you fulfilled your dream of clean dishes .
@lisatroni677 looks to me
you've reached your goal of carrying on the bs nonsense. Its sad because it pits woman who choose to care for their families and those who choose to be full time career women against each other. Most of us watching are LUCKY to live in a world where as women we get to choose to do one, the other or both in a lifetime. I'd continue this but I've got dishes to do.
@@lisatroni677She said about making a home and raising kids one of the best thing about life. That’s so belittling you say about washing dishes
@@JustDiane71 A nice home and a family are the best thing you can have. In the long run people who don’t have family and would rather earn money will be more unhappy when they get old.
Watching this actually made me so so sad 😞 “Basically I trained myself to like it and deal with it” WTF!? I actually hope she makes it out of there with her beautiful children, who is also been controlled and to some degree abused by been forced to march with heavy books or rocks in a bag for discipline?! I honestly feel sick 🤢
When i hear we are devoted Christians, its always a red flag for me!!!
@@lenaannis8787well at my house we are committed Christians however grace is involved. I would need to understand better what they are doing. It sounded a bit alarming to me as well. After all, Christ took on the cross for us so that we don’t have to carry that punishment. We can’t possibly make up for our “sin”. We ask for forgiveness and yes, there are natural consequences at times.
Taking away watching TV is discipline enough. The backpack thing is quite intense. Perhaps they will change how they do things with that after watching this.
I was actually waiting for the "6 year old Asian girl playing the piano" cliche...and yep... there is was!! Haha 😂 😂
Where in the video she plays the piano
@@jillting185213.40
These people are even scarier than the Mormons
My biggest concern about the “tradwife” life is when do you get a day off? When do you get to take a break? Do you get sick days!! The husband works out of the house. He works 8-9 hours 5 days a week, then his job ends…the wife/mom role is 24/7 always on call. That’s the part that seems SO unfair to me. When we are both at home, it would be awesome for both parents/spouses to take on all duties (cooking, picking up, getting kids to bed)
Exactly, free labor IS enslaving, because how would she ever leave? Of course if both parents are home both need to pitch in!
Did you not notice he was carrying around the baby a lot? He talks sweet about his wife. She serves him well. He adores her deeply. She is his queen. If she is sick, he orders pizza or something along those lines. He is her husband. He loves her. Sheesh. 🙄 Why do people act like tradwives are all abused. Most of us are not. We are spoiled by our loving husbands who take extremely good care of us. I was sick, so after working a 10 hour shift, my Husband went to the store after work, got stuff to make healthy soup, and came home and made me soup. That is 99.9% of tradwives. That's what happens. He says, "Baby, you rest if you're sick. Take a nap if you need to. Take a break off you need to. Make sure you're drinking enough water and eating enough protein." Etc I am precious to him. I treat him well and serve him well and he treats me like a queen. No boss is gonna treat a woman that way. You are easily replaced at work, but not so much by your husband and children. Please stop looking at us like we're poor, brainwashed, abused women.
@@shelleyroper588 Well, Shelley, that may be how it happens in your household, but Lillian admitted that in THEIR home, she would have to ask her husband’s permission to not make dinner if she wasn’t feeling up to it.
Queen my pretty ass….🤨
According to Fillipe, his job isn’t just 9-5, 5 days per week. Remember, he’s got that wall to guard 24/7….🙄
I grew up in a traditional christian household. My dad is the head of our family, my mother is the one that manages the house and everything. It was nice, because my parents had attention for me and themselves. It makes me feel balanced now that I am grown up. I grew up in a loving family, there was always a parent right at my side when I needed it, we talked a lot, played together and have fond memories. Mind you, my mum had a giant carreer, multiple master degrees as well. But she decided for herself to stay home. When I became a teenager she worked for 12 hours a week, because She didn’t need to tend after me so much. Nowadays she is still our household manager. Your family reminds me of mine. My parents are still happily in love after 30 years, they take time for each other and share everything. But, I have a carreer of my own as a musician, and in the future I want to combine this with having kids. Staying home would make me go crazy I think. But it can change, it is all possible. In these days everyone has a free choice in how they do their family life, let’s be nice to each other and respect each other.. Lillian reminds me of my mum, and they seem like a very happy family. The kids are well-behaved and so cute. God bless you all!
They are well behaved, because they do not want to carry heavy items on their backs.
I hope my kids speak about me and my husband like this when they’re older.
Meh
Of course the kids are well-behaved. They are getting tortured if they don't.
I think there is a difference between staying home because you want to and then being this level of "tradwife".
Also, my child was a ridiculously obedient child. Why? I have no idea but I do know it's not because she carried heavy rucks on her back while marching. That punishment is not okay.
Auch this man does not know that he is teaching his children they are only a worth of being here if they are good enough. Very dangerous as the children will need outside circumstances to feel worthy of being here
This is absolutely insane to me. First of all I literally laughed out loud when she associated the word masculine with him. And second if she really thought that if she made more money she would go out and try to find another woman so that he wasn’t in that role anymore, what the hell is the point of being married?? Everything about this literally just stinks
Narcissist BIG RED FLAG!!!!!!! FAR from family, from society...home school....omg. pray for this women when she wake up. 😐
You are SO respectful to everyone you visit. SUCH an example to everyone.
Big respect to Stacey for keeping an open mind and being unbiased
those children look miserable. not a single smile damn lmao.
This absolutely breaks my heart. And the mom says so many things with such a forced smile. I hope she finds someone else who allows her to speak up and make her own decisions, like not making dinner every single day no matter how she feels. UGH shame on this man.
A career has an ending, but children are your never ending legacy.
This is what it was like in the 1950's, housewives with their "mother's little helpers". My mother wanted nothing more than to have children and be a housewife but found herself isolated and depressed. Having an outside job was fulfilling in addition to being a housewife even though it wasn't a financial necessity. My childhood best friend's mother found her fulfillment in having a 20 year affair while still being devoted to her husband. I experienced my mother's depression and never wanted anything to do with either life style.
Wow i have no words for this. Abuse of kids is never ok.
1. If the Vicar had an issue with the language, and gave a DISCLAIMER, then he understands the power of words first off, and as he says archaic.
2. The issue I have, is this puts these women in such a dangerous position. To not have the independence to work and have their own money. She has an “allowance”. To me this kind of lifestyle is a breeding ground for predators to hurt or abuse their wife.
3. You can stay home. You can honor your husband, be the primary caregiver to the children without this archaic parts to this. You can be submissive without being a doormat.
This is terrifying. Terrifying for the women who have no safety net in place if they need to get out. I am just more scared for the kind of men who will use this “lifestyle” to hurt women, because they also will only be surrounded by other women who live this lifestyle.
you have to have a good bloke who doesn't abuse his position. Not everyone knows how to lead
💯
100%. Even the religious ones tend to pick and choose how they want to live. Usually they will remind the wife of her RELIGIOUS duty towards her husband whilst arrogantly ignoring his own duty towards her (talking from experience of seeing this first hand) which is why I'm downright refusing to be a tradwife. I just don't give a damn. Would rather be no-ones wife or a single mother than someone who thinks submission is the key to a happy marriage.
I think that arrangement can work really well but it 90% depends on the personalities of the couple and how controlling the husband is. Lillian and Felipe seem like a really good mix as he appears to be pretty chilled and respects Lillian and praises her (she's trained singer) - I think if you were married to a domineering aggressive pig it would be a whole different thing.
That indeed is the danger of the whole thing. Another danger is that certain religious denominations would use this to exploit and brainwash People.
@@soeffingwhat all denominations do that pretty well!
This is only what you see on camera. The fact that Felipe chose to make that comment about Stacey’s hoop earrings at the beginning of the video is just totally unnecessary and quite disrespectful.
That’s the same thing with any marriage at all, you can be in a completely modern setup where both people are expected to work full time and outsource childcare still have an aggressive, mean, controlling husband or wife.
@@Theprincessinyellow that’s true but, isolation will intensify it.
The little girl is looking at Stacey like, please get me out of here.
Yeah, like, “Please don’t leave, Miss Stacey! Daddy is never this nice when it’s just us here alone…😢”
Couples should have whatever dynamic works for them. The one caveat I would add for stay at home partners is have a skill or something that can earn you money should you need to. If something were to happen to your spouse/partner it provides a safety net for you. It also reduces the risk of being caught in an abusive relationship.
I like it
Exactly, people have a habit of seeing a successful traditional couple and automatically thinking that its like that for everyone. As someone who grew up in a very conservative family where most women were housewives, I can tell you that this couple on our screens is most definitely part of the minority. I'm glad they look happy, but in my own family I never saw a happy traditional housewife. Their husbands were flawed beyond belief. Everything from cheating to domestic violence, to unfairness, addictions, forcing the wife to uproot and leave everything behind to follow him everywhere even though she didn't want to... have all been scenarios in my family. Ideally the husband respects his wife and her wishes but many times they let the power of him controlling the purse strings get to their head.
As you get older you realise you have experienced a slice of history, I am now 60 and can remember the 1970s when there was talk about feminism but it was often speculative. Germain Greer talked a lot but never had children and a career , it was theoretical , appropriately being an academic. But a lot of my generation actually did it, you then realise that rising pressure from employers radically reduced family time if both parents worked. And there are huge childcare costs. Especially since it’s after tax money, after school clubs , paying people to pick up and drop off etc. So you wind up paying a lot of the money to other people to do what you want to do. Also this social change stoked the housing market since there was a larger working population, so we all ended up with huge mortgages. Many people of my age may disagree, but if your in your 70,s or older and are a great advocate of the social change in the 1980s and 1990s try talking to my generation first, we actually lived it. I would add that my wife earns more than I do, I think women should have full access to education and careers, but don’t be deluded there is a cost.I stopped employed work for three years for this reason (I did some business development work for my wife’s firm from home). My message is you can try having it “all” but it won’t work, there will a shortfall elsewhere. I think a lot of younger people will adapt the feminist theories of the 70s. Because they have significant gaps.
Thats how I was raised by my christian parents. I did everything I was supposed to but that didn't prevent him from cheating and trying to kill us. Im now a divorced single mom and will never encourage my kids to do what I did.
This sounds massively unhealthy for everyone involved. To have a healthy relationship, my view is that you must be an equal team. You should benefit from your spouse’s ideas and grow. A “yes” woman is not going to help anyone grow.
I think it was extremely inhospitable to say he was counting down the days! He's , they're LUCKY they got to do this with such an awesome, talented, kind hearted star!❤
This is totally giving handmaids tale 😮
Be what you want to be, you all look very happy and extremely well mannered family, much love ✌️♥️
I agree! And ❤a good sense humor too!
Their little daughter is adorable. What a sweetheart! The mom is really graceful and lovely.
Awww so sweet! As someone with a masters myself I also agree that equality does not mean both have to work and then both have to do house chores, we can design our lives whatever way we want! As long as a relationship is built on respect both ways any approach can work!
I don't see a problem here. This seems to be a very healthy marriage in which their roles are mutually agreed upon. They're not harming anyone. The idea of women who want to be housewives doesn't have to mean an abusive old-fashioned scenario, it can be done very respectfully. If it's not for you then fine, but just live and let live.
They are harming the kids, no end. How will they be ready for actual life in the 21st century if at home it's 1954?
@@aurevoiralex how are they harming the kids? We all know school/ high school is the place where the kids pick up bad behaviour and get into bad surroundings. I think homeschooling is something we should all try to do to protect our kids until we can
I’m torn. I see your point, But… Not sure how respectful it is to say “my wife has many opionions, is free to voice them, however I ultimately decide cause i am the man”. Sure it’s agreed upon now. But what if one day, she actually needs or dare I say wants to make a decision herself?
Thank you for saying what I couldn’t put into words.
@@aurevoiralex at least they actually have kids
I think expecting dinner on time or house being spotless when he comes back from work is not right, as the woman is also doing house chores and taking care of the kids as well. You can’t expect her to be a super woman and juggle everything 🙄. Unless of course you have a luxury life where you have nannies and all you have to do is pamper yourself and be a woman of leisure.
She has 8-12 hours to do it though whilst he's out working.
@@arthurfleck8777 hmm something tells me you haven’t looked after 3 young children all day everyday on your own, as well as doing all the cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. On top of that she is homeschooling her children and she has a young baby so is probably up multiple times in the night to feed and woken up early in the morning by the kids. Then she also has to make herself look beautiful for her husband and provide meals for him…
@@goldilocks4112provide /prepare & present meals ON TIME! He choose the outfit she wore to the christening, now that just sums him up 🤯
Heavy bag as punishment for kids?? Sorry but that is corporal punishment and its abuse.
Stacey, you go girl!!!! I'm also a proud feminist and it's always so refreshing to see women empowering women ✨️ I love you so much ❤️
You can be a feminist and choose traditional gender roles in your relationship, or be a housewife. The point of feminism is that women are able to choose for themselves and have equal human rights. I don't see why they have to be so preachy at other people?
Choice feminism is not meeting the requirement. Feminism is a movement to liberate women, and not every woman’s choice furthers this goal. She should be free to live her life but it is not feminism at all. Also her husband is an engineer and would probably be a menace to women at his workplace, not respecting their authority or make degrading comments.
feminism is nothing to do with womens choices
@@annaboulderco THANK YOU. Do what you want but I am not sure how that is a feminist decision. Being a housewife is also not a feminist choice but one can be a feminist and a housewife and raise strong children, whether they are feminist or not.
@annanoulderco
So basically feminism is not down to what the woman wants but you TELLING her what she wants? Makes you wonder where the term feminazi comes from . .
I love this comment especially the last part because alot of ppl preach their narrative to u and say u have to do this or be ostracised when feminism should be for women to choose what they want for themselves and be free and happy doing that without judgement.
I love being a housewife and a mother to my two girls. I'm constantly asked 'when are you going back to work' or... 'so what are your plans when the girls are in school?'. Before being a housewife I was so aimless and miserable, now I have a purpose and I feel whole.
That’s all good as long as your husband isn’t like Philippe.
@@Gioli565 yeah definitely not hahaha 🤣
Stacey is gorgeous! When the husband made the comment about Stacey's realigns a) he admiring her beauty but b) he was manifesting his natural desire to tell women what clothes they should wear and of course Stacey was having none of it even subconsciously. The card wife dynamic is a little like sm in the one of giving up one's power to one's partner. The obvious drawback is that the woman has nothing to fall back on if the relationship doesn't work out. The husband comes across as a bit smug and Napoleon complexish.
As a feminist, I'm totally cool with people living like this. In fact it brings me genuine joy seeing people so happy with their way of living. It becomes an issue for me when they're crapping on feminism, LGBTQ, and ways of living different than theirs. Or if they raise kids with fear and complete and unconditional obedience (obviously not saying they do that)
theyre definitely brainwashing their children.. im surprised they were able to admit and air on tv that they make their children carry around a bag of heavy items as punishment. it should be illegal to homeschool your children and completely isolate them from the world and treat them like this. its definitely fear and unconditional obedience
I am pretty sure the husband is a misogynist and she as well, because of how they view the roles of women and men. Imagine being his female coworker. They can live their lives, but they see women as lesser than men period. How can a feminist support that
This can only work if he doesn't abuse his position, he doesn't cheat and expect u to accept and all the BS.
Of course
Yeah most men would take advantage. I would love for Stacy to check in in another 10 years and see how this relationship has held up
Anyone who has stayed home to run a household and raise three kids knows how challenging it is. Choosing to tackle that role does not diminish the tackler in any way. Freedom of choice is vital in any free society. No one should criticize another person’s choice, or their right to change their mind eventually according to changing circumstances.
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That’s not the issue. Anyone is allowed to chose how their family works. The issue is that she is verbally told that her role is less equal to her husband’s and her husband has the final say in all decisions. I do most of these tasks in my marriage too but it would never be wrong of me to ask my husband to do the laundry or clean the dishes, whereas in this relationships it is. She has specific expectations to meet which are decided by her husband. She doesn’t have the liberty to relax in her own home.
@@milliekirk maybe she aknowladges the fact that her husband works all week to provide for the family, and he cant tell his boss he isnt going to do tasks,
maybe she uses her tasks at home and CHOOSES not to say no as symbolism to show that she understands his struggles at work and its her way of supporting him. just like he supports her freedom to be at home and not wasting her life at work.
they are religious after all and symbolism plays a huge part in religion. hence his kids punishment is wearing a rucksack and marching because of jesus or whatever they said
also we dont know that if she had a genuine reason he would be fine and take over, we havent seen that or it wasnt discussed, she even said, "if dinners late are you punished?" "no"
Ok buy being a working mother is even harder. I've been both.
Criticising peoples choices is very fair. She can do what she wants but she is out there online trying to recruit people to her cause. So she opens herself up for that 100 percent
I'm in my fifties, from the UK, this is exactly how I and 95% of people I knew were raised, apart from that much church maybe.
I'm so torn on this. On the one hand I feel that a core aspect of feminism is to respect the choices of all women, including those who choose to adopt traditional gender roles in the home. There are absolutely women out there who are more than happy with this kind of lifestyle, and I applaud those for having the drive and desire to run the home and raise the children. My own mum has always been a housewife, dedicating her life since motherhood to do just that. I've seen first hand how much time, work and effort goes into this kind of role, and I'm so grateful to have had my mum available to me 24 hours a day. The other half of me feels immediately anxious at the thought of being subservient to another person, as well as being an unpaid cleaner and teacher in my own home. The thought of not earning my own money, never having a meal cooked for me, and never being able to take a break from the monotony of the home is horrifying to me. My opinion is that in order for any partnership to survive and thrive, there needs to be balance and compromise. My dad earned the money, my mum ran the home, but by God has my dad always known who the real boss of the house is and that he wouldn't last a week without her.
100% agree! Although I'm a SAHM now, I basically collect a 'salary' for myself every month that goes into my account. Kind of like pocket money on steroids 🤪🤣.
Makes me.feel.more independent.
I believe you can adapt your relationship and lifestyle to whatever feels right for you ❤️
What I dont understand nowadays, is how I you follow tradition or previous " social norms " you are often critised by those who don't. I am not saying some things are choices rather than a natural existence e.g. homosexuality, before people start jumping on Me. What I'm saying is, it's OK to be gay, bi, trans, gender fluid, non binary, black, feminist.... etc etc and I 100% agree, however, it now seems taboo to be straight, white,male,tradwife etc. Surely the fight is for equality not a reversal of prejudice?
One thing I HATE I being referred to as " cis" I don't have an issue with a person referring to me as a person who identifies as the same gender as that I was born, but I do not like terminology being bestowed on me by others that are not. I would not refer to a person as a " tranny" unless that is how they chose to be referred to so why would it be OK for someone to slide a label I find offensive on me?
@@georginacat7667 Thank you so much for making that point. I was born a girl, and I grew up to be a woman and throughout all the years, I was also female. That is how I identify, and how I choose to identify. If we, or even just I, support others having their choice of identity label respected, I would also like mine respected. And yes, there is something that feels like a reverse prejudice when I am referred to as "cis". I don't know the origin of the term, but to me it feels like a term that wasn't coined by someone living as the gender they were identified as at birth. It feels like I am being identified as "other", and in some situations there is also a feeling of being regarded as somehow inferior. So please don't call me "cis".
@@TheKim369 not u trynna act like a minority cause u were called a cis LMAOAO
Yeah but noone is forcing you to do any of that, that you so dread. just obviously dont go for a guy that wants a trad wife lol.
Sorry to break it to you but if your dad hadnt met your mum or had his children he would be just fine im sure. That "wouldnt last a week" statement is very silly and inacurate and actually is a very negative dig at your dad and his ability to survive on earth without a woman.
I infact dread the whole relationship life, to think just because im a man i shouldnt be cooking at home, cleaning, decorating, deciding what furnature can go where. To have my whole style, expression and taste relegated to a dingy celler or tiny closet under the stairs (which seems to be the trend lately) or freazing cold uninsulated garden shed, labelled a "man cave" to make me feel better about it, or in your dads case (speaking from experiance here) having to come home to an overimposing personality in the home being told what to do and what goes where and how im doing everything wrong, being told what i can and cant spend my hard earned money on yet the wife buys some more tea towels when we already have 5 because "they match the kitchen" which i hate the look of anyway. being told where to sit on "his favourate chair" and only real purpose is to go to work to bring home the money. but its all ok and normalised because its dressed up in "cute" (actually quite abusive) little statements like "im the real boss of the home" and "he wouldnt last a week without me" and "you dont have decorting style" or "real men dont care about furnature and what colour the kitchen is"
Hats off to you for recognising that trad wifes still deserve the respect of femininst as the whole point of feminism was about equal oppertunitys and for women to have the choice of what they want to do. I was very dissapointed in holly willoughbys interview with the trad wife and how she tried to make out that the wife was somehow being controlled by her husband and letting down the side of feminism. (not sure if you have seen that interview)
You can get a PhD and then decide not to pursue a career and start a family and dedicate yourself to that instead! Either path way is as valid and as beautiful and rewarding ❤
I also totally agree with the aspect of the parenting about reduction of television and homeschooling. Such tiny little impressionable brains. I grew up with unrestricted access to screens and internet as a child and it definitely exposed me to the world too hard and too fast for me to handle. I’m also neurodivergent and so if I have bio kids (I won’t because I’m going to be sterilised) but if I had a wife who was neurodivergent our children would probably be neurodivergent too and the modern education system completely failed and still fails our wonderful beautiful neurodivergent kiddos. Homeschool is such a safe and healthy environment.
This is painful to watch.
Why ???
Philippe is terrifying... psycho alarm ... RUN
😂😂😂😂😂 he picks out a 50’s housewife dress for her to wear to the christening.
Omg. The little girl started crying. It made me cry.
Honestly Stacey Dooley is so down to earth that’s why I love her and her work and I believe in many things she does like feminism and atheism
Why ?
@@fredarcher7264 because In the 21st century we are given so many opportunities to find things for ourselves like religion beliefs politics and by that we can decide what we do believe rather than following our parents
@@TheLorax-l5m Yes , and look at the mess such a path has led to . Welcome to the modern world !
@@fredarcher7264 not my fault people take advantage of it 😌
She does atheism, how?
So she has been so controlled that she likes being 'obedient' you're not a dog, you're a human being.
I was born in 1963, where my father was the boss. As a child, I very much noticed my mom not having much input for major purchases. It was always my dad’s choice. She went to work when I turned 6, so she would have money to buy things she wanted. When I was in my teenage years, I decided I would not let any man tell me what to do. Watching my mom not being able to voice her opinion. I had boyfriends through out my life, but I feel growing up the way I did, totally changed my view about marriage. I am now 61 and only married at 53. Oh, mom started really voicing her opinions when my brother and I was no longer was at home.
Well! Imagine my surprise when I realized I was a Tradwife! I did this for 10 years! It just didn’t work out for us beyond that because my husband (now ex) was a narcissist. He had such a tight grip on my life that it was almost impossible for me to get away from him. Had he not forced me to go back to work, I would have died as a Tradwife.
The worst is their narrowmindedness. Not accepting feminism, punishing their kids for naughtiness with carrying something heavy like Jesus...That's the real danger. Nothing wrong with being a housewife! If he decides to leave her she has nothing. He can probably have other women and she wouldn't be allowed to say anything. I'm wondering if there are Tradwives out there without any religious background...
What possible benefit is there in depriving your kids of knowing the real world by homeschooling? It won't stop what's going on out there that you don't like but will certainly leave your children unprepared for it. Felipe has Svengali tendencies that he needs to look into.
Thank you for this comment!! Home schooling is extremly overrated! Two master degrees of this mother were just waste of time and her parents money. Basic social skills and simply joy of time you share with other students is taken away from these kids at the start 😔😒
My youngest daughter has decided, of her own volition, decided to be more of a "trad" wife. I'm totally bemused by this as I'm anything but, and she was brought up in a single parent feminist household. Everyone to their own obviously and I like her partner, and no he's not a bigoted dominator
We have to live and let live. That's why I disagree with these NGOs who go into faraway countries and try to educate the wives to be more independent and that they can be the bread winner if they choose -- that kind of thing can upset traditional societies and cause havoc.
As you just said, she was brought up in a single parent feminist household...that might be the reason she chose to be a Traditional wife...
@@annother3350 What are women in those societies supposed to do if their husband dies before the kids have reached adulthood? Remarry a few days after his death?
@@andrewjones575 Perhaps the extended family helps but it's completely not up to us to decide for them if people are generally happy in these societies.
@@durin-trueking9464 Seems perhaps she chose the opposite life to her own mother's for whatever reason
I have been a housewife (don't like the name tradwife, seems a derogatory term) all my life... loved it, I was in base camp as we called, it, the kids knew someone was home all the time... but my hubby of 39 years was a and still is a treasure... he helped with anything I asked, or not asked. TEAM work, it works :)
That's cool. Did your husband brainwash your and did you have to mentally trick yourself into enjoy doing the washing, cooking cleaning though? Some woman want to be a house wife and that's fantastic. But if have to trick yourself into laundry being your favourite chore and always smile and pretend that everything is fantastic like this lady there's a difference.
Being a housewife and being a tradwife are not the same thing. You can be a housewife without being ‘submissive’ to your husband.
I had a summer seasonal job where I worked 10 hours a day which was exhausting and then was at home for 6 months in the winter taking care of my home, husband and children, my kids would hate it when I returned to work in the summer months and counted the days in the Autumn for my finish date! I loved my job but felt guilty that things at home slipped and my kids were neglected and equally adored my winters just being a mum, cooking lovely meals, baking and doing things with my family! Ask my kids and they would say they preferred me at home with them for sure! I don't think we have equality, I think most of us struggle to find a balance!
Omg story of my life 💔
Exactly 90% of modern mum are going through this and not speaking up a woman can’t have it all
If you want your tea at a particular time, then do it your sodding self!
Up yours woman !
My husband will get home from work and sometimes make the dinner.....he's no mouse either, very masculine etc
@@nell8170 because being able to feed yourself isn't a non-masculine thing ;)
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I feel so blessed to be a SAHM. My baby is 5 months and its a beautiful experience and i am currently 3 months pregnant again. My partner looks after me in providing and i look after him by running the household for us. It works so well for us and our baby. I had a lengthy career in construction before and made good money but this job of being a mother is 100x better and more important. Not everyone has this option but i think for very young children it is so important for the mother to be with them.
Ugh! "Submit and obey your husband!" He's just one more guy on the planet? Why should she feel he is her own personal God?! These sound like tenants from a cult. How awful (and dangerous), for one to do :(
He certainly didn’t appeal to me as he came across as very controlling. My mother was a housewife but she had far more freedom than this woman appears to have. Anyway each to their own!
I don't like him at all.
You have a lovely family and beautifully brought up children so it certainly works for you guys!
I've watched your reaction videos and it was nice to see the family behind it. People seem to focus on the woman losing out by staying home, but not so much the man who goes out to work, to build a career and an income to pay for the home, heat, light, food and clothing and deal with the stress of that.
Felipe said it's in a man's DNA to provide and protect which I agree with. I watched a video recently asking men and women who should make the sacrifice if a couple were told one must die. ALL the men said they should die and the woman should live. ALL the women said the man should give up his life for them. This is what men do and we're not celebrated for that.
My view is live your life the way you want. You seem a very happy family.
Finally. Great comment. The Bible says a man is to lay down his life for his wife. Nobody makes shows about that, as if it's nothing. But a loving respecting wife is an issue. Weird world. God bless!
@@HBudianu It's not respect, when you pretend to be less than another & try to propagate that to others. It's like "submissive" black people started slavery again, under nice masters, who treat them well. Just creepy & bound to go south as an experiment on a larger scale.
Nice how they portrayed the different views in a respectful manner ❤
No one smiles as much as Lillian does and is still completely sane....it's a little 90's Xanax mom like tbh
From the outside looking in people might think I would agree with this. I’m a Conservative Catholic stay-at-home mom. I used to homeschool. But I find the “Trad Wife” movement very troubling. I can say as a mom of 3 children that has also homeschooled that she absolutely must be exhausted keeping the house super clean, homeschooling, and taking care of the kids. On top of that she is dressing up for it. This looks more like a short term performance than daily life.
The problem with “trad wife” ideals are that they seem to focus on only one half of what is written in Ephesians. The movement forgets that in return for “submission” the husband is supposed to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. He is supposed to be humble and even willing to die for the good of his wife. That means being very attuned to her needs and feelings. When the whole of the passage is read to include the expectations for the husband, there is no room for a man with an ego.
I feel most of the people that love the “trad wife” movement are chasing a caricature of femininity and trying to pass it off as a tradition. But both Ephesians and Proverbs 31 run very counter to the narrow definition of “tradition” in this modern “trad” movement. It is okay to have very set roles. It is okay to be a stay-at home mom. But it is not okay to set standards that are not in alignment with long term reality.
my mum was what you could call a 'trad wife'. My dad had serious mental health problems, lost his job and became an alcoholic. My sister and I grew up in a pretty messy environment, was all its lasting effects, as she didn't have the finances or confidence to leave. Really saddens me to see this peddled out as some sort of goal for girls and women, as our rights are stripped away in supposed developed countries. So brainwashed by layers of utter BS.
Is Felipe a misogynistic lunatic? Nearly shat my pants. Stacey is such a queen!
He's a total bell end!
Feminism doesn't take issue (or, shouldn't under most current theories) with women who choose to be housewives. It takes issue with women being subservient to their husbands. Feminism wants adults in relationships to have equal power (ie be partners in a relationship). If a woman chooses to be a housewife but is a partner with her husband, that isn't a problem. At the same time, a working woman who had to defer to her husband as the head of the household maybe wouldn't be the most feminist set up. It's about agency and equality, not the division of labor.
My sister is one of these. While there are many housewives and househusbands in the world, tradwife is something different entirely. I've come to learn they are all narcissists who turn what ordinarily is a humble, selfless way of life with no adulation or fanfare into something that feeds their egos
My sister is one too. I no longer recognise her and we have zero communication now unfortunately.
You are just jealous on your sisters happiness, while you at work are pushed around by your own boss, and too exhausted to take good care of your children when you come home.
@@lynpip3097 Why, because she's happier than you?
"... they are all narcissists..." Have you really met ALL of them?!? Or just
@@jolin8493 I feel very sorry for women in this day and age, its the feminist indoctrination of our women that caused her to be "pushed around by your own boss, and too exhausted to take good care of your children" its very sad. as a man who has worked 40hours a week since i was 15, it is NOT something I would tell our women to be striving for. you waste your whole life working to line the pockets of your boss. and we beg for holiday days so we can just relax to catch our breaths. It is the biggest lie told to our young women who waste away there youths and struggle to bring up children while chasing the femenists dream world they have invented
I’m a housewife without children and I think we should respect and accept the choices women decide to make for their lives. Regardless of progressive or traditional theres room for both types of women❤️
Well said. Same here, no kids and whether a woman chooses to stay home or go to work out of the home, it's all a personal choice.
Agreed
Horrible. So many women are trapped in a bad marriage because they are dependent on a man. He is litterally trapping her.
Children are better off with parents who are seperated/divorced but can co-parent and respect eachother before parents who are unhappy and/or in a controlling relationship.
Btw, my man who I'm not married to and have two children with makes about 2/3 of my salery because he has a lower paying job and works less than me. We both take care of the household and children but he does more because he works less.
Strange that he hasn't cheated on me yet after 12 years because of unhappiness.
Everyone choose what kind of relationship you want but to be dependent on your partner financially is always the wrong choice because this will mean that you will have no choice. You have no idea where life takes you and this guy is showing strong signs of disrespect towards women who doesn't act the way he likes. A commited relationship or being married is a partnership and that means equality and respect.
As a feminist, I have no issue with a woman *choosing* to become a SAHM/W. That is the point of the belief system.
This family seems nice, but I can see the purposeful isolation and evangelical brainwashing being done here, and that is concerning.
Your kids are gorgeous,cuteness overload 😍
I wish for a follow up in twenty years.
I’m a married woman with a Husband I truly love. I’ve come to realize that women are raised to be single mothers that struggle alone. We weren’t taught how to be great partners for life. There is something to this, and I say this as a professional woman.