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The ONLY MOVIE Steven Seagal ever Directed

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  • čas přidán 17. 08. 2024
  • On this episode of Weird Movies With Mark, I talk about the one movie that Steven Seagal starred in as well as directed
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    Credits Music by: OVERWERK
    Chapters:
    0:00 Intro
    1:53 Steven Seagal plays Steven Seagal
    2:54 Don't look back at the explosion
    3:28 Familiar faces
    4:45 Slap happy Steve
    7:29 Stevis Beacon Teaches Typing
    8:39 Hugh's hiding skills
    8:58 Trusting the guy you don't trust
    10:23 Saving Steven
    11:29 Stealing sleds with Steve
    13:11Spiritual journey
    15:05 Have you seen this man?
    16:48 Hugh's house
    17:59 Hiring mercenaries
    18:12 John, Masu, Steve & Coffee
    19:20 Cave of explosives
    21:03 One man wrecking crew
    22:04 Steve saves the World
    23:17 Final Thoughts
    23:52 Ending Skit / Credits

Komentáře • 2,1K

  • @wurdnurd1
    @wurdnurd1 Před 2 lety +1250

    Michael Caine has talked about why he opts to be in seemingly crappy movies, and he even wrote about it in his memoir. The gist of it is, Caine decides his projects based on where the filming is, if he wants to go there, and if he can bring his family. Pretty awesome, if you ask me...

    • @rossamullen5918
      @rossamullen5918 Před 2 lety +351

      Michael Caine on Jaws the Revenge: “I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."

    • @moxxie9707
      @moxxie9707 Před 2 lety +73

      Gotta respect the commitment to artistic integrity

    • @anitarasmussen2810
      @anitarasmussen2810 Před 2 lety +67

      Well yeah Caine can actually act. Pretty well in fact. Steven??????(

    • @anitarasmussen2810
      @anitarasmussen2810 Před 2 lety +15

      @@rossamullen5918 the worst of all jaws movie's

    • @imogenx9145
      @imogenx9145 Před 2 lety +38

      I think I read something similar for Christopher Walken where he says yes to a lot because he never knows if it'll be any good or not.

  • @nicks1451
    @nicks1451 Před 2 lety +487

    I burst out laughing when he used a flaming building to light his cigarello. Can you imagine a firefighter pulling up to your burning home and taking out a pack of smokes like, well, might as well put this tragedy to good use.

    • @oldhickory4686
      @oldhickory4686 Před 2 lety +8

      Lol! Love it...

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +25

      They don't even do smoking in modern mainstream movies anymore. Let alone a firefighter breaching professional boundaries by lighting up a cigarillo at a burning site. With flame from an active fire. Only in the 90s!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • @ItsMrAssholeToYou
      @ItsMrAssholeToYou Před 2 lety +32

      Not to mention the raw petroleum would contaminate the tobacco and make at least the first several puffs taste absolutely vile. Yeah, you can taste it through the flame. Just ask anyone who's lit a cigarette off a match before the phosphor's exhausted.

    • @whoelsebutmeofcoursei
      @whoelsebutmeofcoursei Před 2 lety +1

      I can't imagine a motherfker doing this in real life, imagine how much of a embarassing bastard one has to be to pull of that move IN REAL LIFE XD

    • @joebwannabe
      @joebwannabe Před 2 lety +9

      Reminds me of that Greg Giraldo joke "holy shit, my house is on fire!....marshmallows"

  • @Top10WizardReviews
    @Top10WizardReviews Před 2 lety +490

    Theory: You could edit together scenes from all of Steven Seagal's movies into one giant epic and it would fit almost seamlessly. His characters are always the same. Someone do this, please.

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Před 2 lety +31

      Yeah, he basically has no acting talent. Plays the same stoic badass in every movie

    • @rmx4087
      @rmx4087 Před 2 lety +18

      Steve Cigar thinks he's James Bond.

    • @kennywilkinson913
      @kennywilkinson913 Před 2 lety +21

      The pacing would be way off, with a strong 1st act, a didn't see this coming 2nd. And wtf is this switch me off now 3rd act.
      Ironically like most modern movies

    • @redharrison894
      @redharrison894 Před 2 lety +3

      @@SwiftNimblefoot Well you can say the same thing about Jim Carrey or Jackie Chan? No one can play Steven Seagal roles except him!!

    • @carldzoga1348
      @carldzoga1348 Před 2 lety +7

      His movies are practically sequels, LOL

  • @beggar1015
    @beggar1015 Před 2 lety +70

    Michael Caine has been in so many films. I seriously have wondered if he's ever been chilling at home, channel surfing on a Sunday afternoon when he's stumbled across one of his many performances and thought, "I'm in this movie?"

    • @mrcliff3709
      @mrcliff3709 Před 2 lety +13

      I imagine he made a drinking game of it or something akin to it at this point

    • @madmanarrivednow
      @madmanarrivednow Před 2 lety +14

      Easy. His good films are work, the bad ones are holidays.

    • @tanya4534
      @tanya4534 Před 4 měsíci +2

      It reminds me of Eric Robert's, he has starred in over 700 projects.

    • @ThePsho
      @ThePsho Před 3 měsíci

      ​@@tanya4534"I'm Duffy"

    • @CrypticCocktails
      @CrypticCocktails Před 2 měsíci

      The movie PCU has a C plot involving this idea

  • @ItsMrAssholeToYou
    @ItsMrAssholeToYou Před 2 lety +365

    Back when _MadTV_ was first-run, I thought Wil Sasso's Steven Segal was an over-the-top parody. Seeing some of these clips now make me realize it was actually a fairly accurate depiction.

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Před 2 lety +27

      Indeed. Though I wish we could get a modern Seagal parody, where he just sits in a shadowed room, overdubbed, and uses body doubles for walking around. :P

    • @elainethomas9737
      @elainethomas9737 Před 2 lety +8

      😅😅😅😅 I had forgotten about that...it was hilarious 🤣

    • @MaximusWolfe
      @MaximusWolfe Před 2 lety +18

      Sasso is a comic genius. His Elvis, Deniro and Arnold impressions are hysterically funny.

    • @Dustemikkel_Rev
      @Dustemikkel_Rev Před 2 lety +15

      At first I thought Sasso was too heavy. Otherwise he was utterly brilliant as Seagal. Then of course he became way too skinny. It was so strange how Sasso and Seagal went in VERY different directions physically. I still maintain that Sasso did a better Seagal than Steven Seagal.

    • @DriscolDevil
      @DriscolDevil Před 2 lety +6

      I was having the exact same thought recently when I was watching a different video about him. Yeah, he really nailed it especially the lazy fat boy kung fu.

  • @davidromeroblaya7920
    @davidromeroblaya7920 Před 2 lety +93

    For Steven Seagal, violence is not the answer but the question. And the answer is "yes".

    • @twcyangon119
      @twcyangon119 Před 2 lety +4

      BAHAHAHAHAHA UNDERRATED COMMENT 💯😂

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking Před 2 lety +4

      Violence is the question and answer. It’s also the part in between where you’re thinking about what the answer is.

    • @curtiskretzer8898
      @curtiskretzer8898 Před 2 lety +2

      That is pretty judgemental bagging on Glimmer Man like that

  • @vvnstn
    @vvnstn Před 11 měsíci +110

    Steven Seagal is an example of what a child would think they'd be like during intense situations

    • @josepha3805
      @josepha3805 Před 6 měsíci +5

      Steven Seagal is more Steven Seagal then you'll ever be

    • @timo4463
      @timo4463 Před 3 měsíci +4

      ​@@josepha3805i dont want to BE Steven seagul 😭

    • @Stonecutter334
      @Stonecutter334 Před 2 měsíci +4

      @@timo4463don’t cry. No one does.

    • @Stonecutter334
      @Stonecutter334 Před 2 měsíci

      Or how a coke fueled narcissist would behave in general. Im sure this is how Trump sees himself too except he’d stop and loot the women’s pocketbooks as well. Then blame the guys he came with for the theft.

  • @Uncultured_Barbarian465
    @Uncultured_Barbarian465 Před 2 lety +22

    I saw this one at the local theatre. Some of us were laughing as we left, as he had that big environmental message at the end of the movie after causing an environmental nightmare by blowing up an oil rig.

  • @DetroitAlan01
    @DetroitAlan01 Před 2 lety +466

    Steven Seagal has had a weird career. From the late 80’s to the mid 90’s, he was leaning hard into an “Italian” identity he’d created for himself. Then, in he late 90’s, he became an “eco-warrior,” draping himself in Native culture and blowing stuff up for the planet. In his defense, Chuck Norris did the same thing with Forest Warrior. Now Seagal’s basically a kung fu manatee, with a goatee and bad dye job. Oh, and he’s also a part time cop and BFF’s with Putin??? More WTF than weird, TBH.

    • @kiramead4133
      @kiramead4133 Před 2 lety

      Don’t forget his side career as a blues musician lol. czcams.com/video/FIkMOdfM69M/video.html

    • @CChissel
      @CChissel Před 2 lety +15

      Didn’t he have some kind of relationship with Kim Jong Un too, or am I thinking of someone else?

    • @MrPoogly
      @MrPoogly Před 2 lety

      Don't forget his lifelong fetish for east asian cultures.

    • @skylx0812
      @skylx0812 Před 2 lety +71

      "Kung Fu Manatee"
      😂

    • @classyredneckcinema9327
      @classyredneckcinema9327 Před 2 lety

      He really is Italian and native American his dad was a Jewish italian and his mom was native American but now he claims he's part Russian mongol and native american Steven u may have Russian and mongol in ur ancestors that doesn't mean u are he just uses acents now to fit in he's a dummy

  • @eddstarr2185
    @eddstarr2185 Před 2 lety +100

    Most action heroes eventually recognize the comedy potential of their own "action hero" persona. This goes double for Steven Seagal because he can't act - making everything he does that much funnier. But instead of fans laughing with Steven Seagal becoming a comedy legend, Steven Seagal has chosen to become an aging action hero, with everyone laughing at him.

    • @amberbaum4079
      @amberbaum4079 Před rokem +9

      He has still so many fans who genuinely like him. Just take a look under any martial art video by some chum here on YT that praises Shitgal's "martial skills". Absolutely fucking deluded these people.

    • @planescaped
      @planescaped Před rokem +1

      He always was a fraud and a macho-obsessed weirdo.
      The guy is a real life cretin, so it is no wonder.

    • @backtoklondike
      @backtoklondike Před 7 měsíci

      Stallone is one off the few action stars who really can't do comedy. But even he has the recognition that he knows what he is and plays into it. Just not in the self-aware way like Arnie.

  • @kuraikenshi2349
    @kuraikenshi2349 Před 2 lety +17

    "A Steven Seagel beats people up scene."
    Pretty much every Steven Seagal movie. Kind of like every Transporter movie.

  • @willamsandell1082
    @willamsandell1082 Před rokem +5

    I was the Production Designer on a Steven Segal film, GLIMMER MAN and you got him exactly..lol

  • @bobjones4469
    @bobjones4469 Před 2 lety +181

    "Steven Seagal just always plays Steven Seagal."
    I have never seen a Steven Seagal movie and yet I still know this is 120% true.

    • @TheJoker-bz3ms
      @TheJoker-bz3ms Před 2 lety +4

      Bro I felt that 100 percent

    • @UniverseofDominion
      @UniverseofDominion Před 2 lety +2

      I grew up with my grandmother watching his movies as if he were the PREMIERE HOLLYWOOD ACTION STAR, and I can verify this. His squinty-eyed, gruff delivery is the only type of "acting" he knows how to perform.

    • @psychedelicpayroll5412
      @psychedelicpayroll5412 Před 2 lety +3

      @@UniverseofDominion My great aunt was watching his films when we visited her once in the nursing home too.😂

    • @UniverseofDominion
      @UniverseofDominion Před 2 lety +2

      @@psychedelicpayroll5412 The older ladies like him, I do not get it.

    • @cesarzpontu8886
      @cesarzpontu8886 Před rokem +1

      so you had no childhood?

  • @ProjectFlashlight612
    @ProjectFlashlight612 Před 2 lety +183

    Michael Caine says yes to every role because he is immune to career consequences from bad films. He just...moves on.

    • @FINNSTIGAT0R
      @FINNSTIGAT0R Před rokem +6

      @Chris Schipper
      Last time I saw him as a lead was in Harry Brown. Don't know if he's been in a lead role since.

    • @lrts1lrts181
      @lrts1lrts181 Před rokem +11

      @@FINNSTIGAT0R he is almost 90. How could he play lead roles?

    • @FINNSTIGAT0R
      @FINNSTIGAT0R Před rokem +3

      @@lrts1lrts181
      I was answering to someone who was talking about Michael Caine and leading roles. I can't remember exactly what it was though that he said.

    • @wanabee
      @wanabee Před rokem +2

      @@FINNSTIGAT0R he was in getting out in style as a lead

    • @eddixon2015
      @eddixon2015 Před rokem

      @@lrts1lrts181 He's top billed in a movie coming out in 2023... make of that what you will.

  • @frankcolumbo4481
    @frankcolumbo4481 Před 3 měsíci +5

    Im from Alaska and the depiction of natives is like something out of Nanook of the North, they don't use dogsleds anymore.

    • @kungfew1396
      @kungfew1396 Před 3 měsíci +3

      Did you notice when the mercs were shown the photo of who they were looking for it was Mark in that fur with a gun? 😂
      I definitely believe you if you say Seagal's depictions of the natives there is wrong, he only cares about himself onscreen.

  • @willamsandell1082
    @willamsandell1082 Před 2 měsíci +5

    I worked on Seagal’s next film Glimmerman .. we Designed some great sets at Warners for him to run around in and blow up..Warners sent him to a fat farm before the filming and he started stopping in our Art Dept. and eating all our Craft Service ..the Studio sent me a memo saying don’t let Steven eat all your donuts every morning Bill..

  • @Stanky2000
    @Stanky2000 Před 2 lety +205

    That explosion with Steven Seagal wasn't cgi. Did that stunt on his own and they had to add those back injuries because he came out of it untouched.

  • @maplebob23
    @maplebob23 Před 2 lety +253

    Regarding feathers, they are exceptionally heavy. This is what makes birds so dangerous. Every time people go outdoors without a Kevlar helmet, they are taking their lives in their hand. As we see at the start of Forrest Gump, a feather hits the main character in the head at the start of the movie causing brain damage and the character rambles on incoherently for the rest of the movie and goes off to murder a woman he has been obsessed with his entire life and kidnaps her child.

  • @koppsr
    @koppsr Před 2 lety +33

    I remember having a friend in school who was a BIG Segal fan. She was into martial arts and had posters and videos of Segal's movies.
    I even rented this particular movie back than because I wanted to understand the appeal.
    It didn't work.

    • @bumbumballsquimneck2161
      @bumbumballsquimneck2161 Před 2 lety +14

      I had a friend who was a huge fan of his too. I used to deliberately mispronounce his name as "seagull" and it used to really wind him up.

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking Před 2 lety +4

      @@bumbumballsquimneck2161 That is the correct pronunciation.
      Who are you going to believe, me or Steven?

  • @viperking12387
    @viperking12387 Před 2 lety +7

    Hearing Mark welcome me back to the show feels like a blanket right out of the drier, warm and comforting

  • @sneakyskunk1
    @sneakyskunk1 Před 2 lety +153

    Mark is acting his butt off in that lodge scene and I am so here for it.

    • @drezworthy
      @drezworthy Před 2 lety +5

      yo for real that shit was fucking hilarious, well done mark bravo lmao

    • @sneakyskunk1
      @sneakyskunk1 Před 2 lety +3

      @@drezworthy He did not have to act so well, but he did. Mark kicks all sorts of ass.

    • @wesleydesot4904
      @wesleydesot4904 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Mark should of played the lead.

  • @WesleyScottOfficial
    @WesleyScottOfficial Před 2 lety +263

    No joke Mark, your acting at 15:14 is better than any "acting" Segal has ever done. 👏👏👏

    • @kenrickeason
      @kenrickeason Před 2 lety +4

      Oh yeah, it's better by miles..

    • @totallyradtyrannosaurus8803
      @totallyradtyrannosaurus8803 Před 2 lety +3

      He looks like a blonde haired Anton Chigurh.

    • @samueltheprideofafrikarobi9319
      @samueltheprideofafrikarobi9319 Před 2 lety +1

      I don't know. True, Segal has NEVER been the greatest actor...but neither has Keanu. I LOVE KEANU; so that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that when you put him in the right things (John Wick, Cyberpunk 2077) he's a vision. Put him in the wrong things (Bram Stoker's Dracula, Much Ado About Nothing) and he stinks up the house. Likewise, Segal hasn't been good AT ALL in decades. However, it would be unfair to say anything other than the fact that everything in his early days between Above the Law and Under Siege (and arguably Under Siege 2) was near gold.
      He used to be a real action star before that star tarnished and fell to the ground at light speed. 🤣

    • @WesleyNiman
      @WesleyNiman Před 2 lety +3

      This part definitely made me laugh too

    • @ENigma-um8zw
      @ENigma-um8zw Před 2 lety +2

      A perfect H Jon Benjamin all throughout

  • @carlosarmandovegavazquez7038

    As an oil rig worker for 13 years, I'm afraid that my boss will betray me, set me up with explosives, rescued by a tribe and being chased by mercenaries. I'm screwed, I don't have the ridiculous jackets Steven Seagal wears!

  • @99rainingflame
    @99rainingflame Před 2 lety +7

    Never fails! I die laughing every time you insert yourself into the movies . This one with that blonde wig omg! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 “Breen Level” should be a saying! 🤣🤣

  • @sirlisterofsmeg333
    @sirlisterofsmeg333 Před 2 lety +353

    Steven Seagal literally punched the racism out of a man. Magnificent.

    • @EssexAggiegrad2011
      @EssexAggiegrad2011 Před 2 lety +58

      Unfortunately, nobody punched the loser out of Segal

    • @pandamonium9255
      @pandamonium9255 Před 2 lety +8

      @@EssexAggiegrad2011 🤣🤣🤣 good +1

    • @theblackflame4002
      @theblackflame4002 Před 2 lety

      Acting like an activist when he's forced women to have sex with him if they want to be in a movie. Typical woke joke

    • @AztecUnshaven
      @AztecUnshaven Před 2 lety

      Sometimes people just need a good ass whooping lol.

    • @shellac23
      @shellac23 Před 2 lety +11

      It’s the guy from dumb and dumber!!!

  • @doctorthirteen5499
    @doctorthirteen5499 Před 2 lety +37

    "Only through the elimination of violence can we achieve world peace".
    -Miami Connection, 1987

    • @oldhickory4686
      @oldhickory4686 Před 2 lety +6

      "Only through violence can we achieve world peace".
      -Miami Vice, 1987

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +6

      Only through breaking some drunk guy's nose can we achieve world peace.
      - Steven Seagal

    • @doctorthirteen5499
      @doctorthirteen5499 Před 2 lety +3

      @@oldhickory4686 "Hey man, you got the stuff?"
      -Miami Vice (1984-1989)

    • @Highice007
      @Highice007 Před 2 lety

      @@doctorthirteen5499 "He's my friend"
      "A FRIEND!!!!" 😡 👊

  • @KentheDeer
    @KentheDeer Před 2 lety +9

    The scene with the explosives-filled cave has me hysterical…
    “In case of what? You declare war on some small country?”
    “Yeah…”🤣

  • @scottdoesntmatter4409
    @scottdoesntmatter4409 Před rokem +3

    Mark, I've seen tons of your videos, and this is easily the best one out of all. The jokes seem to write themselves! Do more Seagal flicks!

  • @cappadocius9379
    @cappadocius9379 Před 2 lety +27

    I know these 80-90s movies can be cheesy but I grew up watching them with my dad. I have this weird love for them because it puts me back in my child hood.

    • @justinmacmillan1966
      @justinmacmillan1966 Před 2 lety +2

      Me too.

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +5

      I think we all do. Its the environment and time surrounding these films that makes us have this strange love for them. The wait for them to be released on VHS, the trip to the video store and paying four bucks a night to hire them, the microwaved popcorn, the movie night. These days we spend half an hour browsing our streaming services and still cant decide what to watch.

    • @TheJoker-bz3ms
      @TheJoker-bz3ms Před 2 lety +1

      Nothing wrong with that brother. That’s why I love the Mario bros movie lol. Bad movies are good. We wouldn’t have mark making these videos if it wasn’t for the bad movies.

  • @gregwasserman2635
    @gregwasserman2635 Před 2 lety +69

    You are only scratching the surface with Seagal. This is an Oscar worthy performance compared to some of his later flicks. You have to see them to believe them.

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +10

      Yeah his post 2003 straight to video stuff makes this movie look like a masterpiece.

    • @CornbreadOracle
      @CornbreadOracle Před 2 lety +6

      My favorites are the ones when he got paunchy and way past his sell by date but he still insists on playing a badass martial arts expert.

    • @redharrison894
      @redharrison894 Před 2 lety

      @@CornbreadOracle On Deadly Ground was a terrible movie, but the sequel Fire From Below it's one of the best action movies of all time

    • @jiggs677
      @jiggs677 Před 2 lety +3

      @@redharrison894 i do not believe you

    • @ronniefromOR
      @ronniefromOR Před 2 lety

      @@CornbreadOracle that was like his third of 74 movies 🙂

  • @jfrancis98
    @jfrancis98 Před 2 měsíci +2

    I like when mark puts himself in the movies. Don’t care about the quality of the costumes. Funny AF. Thank you.

  • @unclecreepy4185
    @unclecreepy4185 Před 2 lety +8

    You should tackle Steven Seagal movies he wrote himself and starred in. It’s one thing for him to play himself in movies because he has no range, but it’s another thing for him to play himself in a role that shows us what he thinks of himself.

  • @doublep1980
    @doublep1980 Před 2 lety +285

    The best part is the end, where Steven Seagull is giving a passionate speech about the environment, *AFTER HE BLEW UP AN ENTIRE OIL RIG* .

    • @hfhhfhfhghf8619
      @hfhhfhfhghf8619 Před 2 lety +5

      hahhahhahh

    • @nicks1451
      @nicks1451 Před 2 lety +41

      And that's after he set off several massive explosions in a forest LOL

    • @dr.burtgummerfan439
      @dr.burtgummerfan439 Před 2 lety

      "We're going to teach you to love and respect nature. Now go stab this bear..."

    • @mccarthy5825
      @mccarthy5825 Před 2 lety +12

      Kung Fu manatee???!! 😂 😂 😂 😂 it's the most perfect description ever

    • @oldhickory4686
      @oldhickory4686 Před 2 lety

      Guy is a sub contractor for an oil company, flies around in helicopters, rides snowmobiles, etc.. "Hey you guys need to use less oil." This must be based on Al Gore flying around the world in his private jet to "protect the environment".

  • @Dadmcdadface
    @Dadmcdadface Před 2 lety +98

    All those 90’s action films you referenced are all classics in a way. The Nic Cage 96/97 trilogy of “The Rock”, “Con Air” and “Face Off” are just amazing and so much fun. I wish more action films were like these nowadays.

    • @Macadamienutz
      @Macadamienutz Před 2 lety +7

      Damn right. We dont get those anymore either. I used to walk out the theatre with my chest puffed out, in a weird way, 90s action flix made me feel more manly

    • @0311matt
      @0311matt Před 2 lety +19

      @@Macadamienutz because we live in a time where being manly is "toxic" now... lame

    • @UnwrittenSpade
      @UnwrittenSpade Před 2 lety +1

      @@0311matt yup it is backwards and gross the woke left isn’t gonna be happy till we’re all androgynous

    • @0311matt
      @0311matt Před 2 lety +3

      @@UnwrittenSpade you got the nail on the head, buddy

    • @jackdanson2
      @jackdanson2 Před 2 lety +7

      @@0311matt John Wick, most super hero movies, most movies with The Rock, most movies with Tom Cruise, all those expendable movies, all the Olympus Has Fallen type movies, I could literally go on for pages with movies from the last 10 years that have classically masculine leads doing "manly" stuff. Stop making stuff up so you can fit it into the fictional narrative that is your world view. Not that it matters anyway, Fury Road was one of the best pure action movies of the past 10 years and it had a female lead. And that's not new.. Terminator 2, Alien.. badass female characters in well done movies, the gender of the characters is irrelevant. If there's a real reason movies like that aren't made it's that film companies are too risk averse and aren't willing to put up big money for an R rated action movie attached to an unknown franchise. So we get PG-13 super hero movies and garbage rehashes over and over.

  • @XBret64
    @XBret64 Před 8 měsíci +1

    Mark slipping his pin up into the movie at 14:57 had me rolling.
    Plus, I live the cameo from the furcoat in Ghostbusters 2.

  • @cheeseburgerinparadise7124

    I live in Alaska. So, this was a comedy. Completely friggin ludicrous on every level

  • @Iceaxe0410
    @Iceaxe0410 Před 2 lety +30

    I always found Steven Seagal movies kind of hilarious. The way he fights sometimes looks like he's just slapping his hands at the enemy. Forgot which one it was where he just slaps a gun out of a bad guys hands, lol. It's just so funny because he acts so serious and tough, but his fights look anything but a lot of the time.

    • @aaronreid8375
      @aaronreid8375 Před 2 lety +6

      And he runs really weird. Seriously, watch his early clips in Hard to Kill or Marked for Death, he has this weird trotting run with a "I don't know what to do with my hands" kind of vibe.

    • @hayorge27
      @hayorge27 Před rokem

      czcams.com/video/5GswOYL9j0s/video.html

    • @hayorge27
      @hayorge27 Před rokem

      @@aaronreid8375 czcams.com/video/nkskuSXqUD0/video.html

    • @bejammin2000
      @bejammin2000 Před 2 měsíci

      That's basically what Aikido is, slapping.
      The problem with Aikido, is that it's so soft as to be useless except in demonstrations at this point.

  • @kuribayashi84
    @kuribayashi84 Před 2 lety +51

    Something tells me that a Neil Breen-Movie with a Big Budget would essentially be like „On Deadly Ground“ but with a Gouvernment-corruption-Theme and the Main Character killing enemies with his mind and not his fists.

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking Před 2 lety +12

      He’s probably spend his entire budget on old laptops he could destroy for no reason

    • @planescaped
      @planescaped Před rokem +6

      @@seanmatthewking I think Breen would spend his entire budget on hiring some name brand actors to be in scenes with him in an empty warehouse. XD

    • @-xirx-
      @-xirx- Před rokem +3

      Breen wishes he could make this movie

  • @AdrianaOliveira-fi5hp
    @AdrianaOliveira-fi5hp Před rokem +1

    "You tried to steal our stuff BUT you have great spirit" AND KILLED THAT MAGNIFICENT BEAR

  • @Bi0mega
    @Bi0mega Před rokem +3

    Worth mentioning, the speech he delivers at the end is actually the truncated version of the one that was filmed: originally it went on for about 11 minutes. The studio said, quite rightly, that there was no way in hell anyone would sit and watch that at the best of times, let alone at the end of an action movie.
    If you haven't listened to a podcast called Behind the Bastards, they do a couple of episodes on him. It's a cliche to say 'his life is crazier than any movie he's ever been in', but in his case, it's kinda true, the man is a nightmare and some of the stuff he's said and done, if someone told you, you'd swear they were making it up.

  • @DOSdaze
    @DOSdaze Před 2 lety +39

    Seagal is so powerful he can literally punch the racism out of people.

    • @Joecbg100
      @Joecbg100 Před 2 lety

      Honestly that might be a great power

    • @thursoberwick1948
      @thursoberwick1948 Před 2 lety +6

      @@Joecbg100 Imagine being able to do it with "antiracism" too.
      Note quotation marks.

    • @endlessnoise9173
      @endlessnoise9173 Před 2 lety +2

      Is that a reference to Good Bad/Bad Bad?

    • @DOSdaze
      @DOSdaze Před 2 lety +1

      @@endlessnoise9173 That is correct, Marks bit on that reminded me of Bryan going off on the same thing. Highly recommend anyone that isn't familiar to check out Good Bad or Bad Bad's video on this movie... and pretty much anything they make.

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking Před 2 lety

      @@thursoberwick1948 Good one.

  • @christopherhayes5238
    @christopherhayes5238 Před 2 lety +40

    BTW, the original concluding speech was a whopping 45 minutes long! So the studio told him that he had to edit it WAY back. Plus, this was definitely a vanity project. The studio only green-lit it so he would do "Underseige 2".

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Před 2 lety +1

      Yeah, it is a well known thing they financed this only so he came back for Under Siege 2.

    • @tonichan89
      @tonichan89 Před 2 lety +1

      I thought that was the dude's entire career

    • @rijjhb9467
      @rijjhb9467 Před rokem

      It's not that bad as a movie, as a vanity project it certainly is better than Cobra.

  • @THEBaldEagle1
    @THEBaldEagle1 Před rokem +2

    Priceless amazing review Mark! As always! I didn't catch this one on the first go-round, but again YOU have created one of your very best!
    Hilarious from start to finish!

  • @Sollm982
    @Sollm982 Před 2 lety +2

    One day Mark should go hunting down and interviewing the actors from such gems like Mind trap or Champagne and bullets and just ask “why” and “what did it take to star in such films”

  • @TomMSTie1138
    @TomMSTie1138 Před 2 lety +44

    The skits in this video are extra funny. Good work, Mark.

  • @milestrombley1466
    @milestrombley1466 Před 2 lety +17

    Steven Seagal: "I must fight a bear!"
    Writer: "Why?"
    Steven Seagal: "Because I can!"

  • @jacotromp59581
    @jacotromp59581 Před 2 lety +4

    I remember seeing this one in the cinema. Back then Steven was amazing, cool and a kick ass master, and we watched him in whatever he was in.

  • @emeraldfox76
    @emeraldfox76 Před rokem +2

    My brother & I discovered this movie on SpikeTV back in the day, and it became our guilty pleasure. So many memeable moments, even before memes existed. Having a bad day? Let’s act out the Hot Hands scene. 🤣
    And yeah, Dr. Cox threw us off completely in this. Totally kept expecting Scrubs-level shenanigans. Nowadays, I bought the dvd of this to watch when I really need a laugh. Works every time! It’s funny, you even pointed out things I never noticed in all my watchings, like that fake pipe or the already-lit cigar. 😂

  • @gordons-alive4940
    @gordons-alive4940 Před 2 lety +19

    That pipe really tied the whole scene together. I do like how there's no opening in the wall for it to attach to though, yeah. Good catch, Mark.

  • @CiardisInferno99
    @CiardisInferno99 Před 2 lety +47

    In the bad movie wilderness, there's a Nicolas Cage path and a Steven Seagal path, and they lead to very different places 🙃

    • @davidmoser3535
      @davidmoser3535 Před 2 lety +3

      YOU DONT WANT TO GO THERE......

    • @moxxie9707
      @moxxie9707 Před 2 lety +4

      Cage has redeemed himself to me as a legitimate actor recently. Movies like Mandy or prisoners of ghostland don't get enough recognition

    • @jazzabighits4473
      @jazzabighits4473 Před 2 lety +4

      @@moxxie9707 Con Air was amazing imo

    • @moxxie9707
      @moxxie9707 Před 2 lety

      @@jazzabighits4473 put the bunny back in the box

    • @MaximusWolfe
      @MaximusWolfe Před 2 lety +8

      Cage is an incredible actor who often makes awful movies. But no one who has ever seen Birdy, Moonstruck, Leaving Las Vegas, Adaptation, Wild At Heart, Red Rock West, Peggy Sue Got married, Joe or Pig would seriously contend that he can’t act. To mention him in same breath as Seagul is to expose ones idiocy.

  • @iluvtachyons
    @iluvtachyons Před 6 měsíci +1

    15:16 this cut to mark in THIS wig cured my depression. Then gave me a stomach ache from laughing so damn hard.

  • @kungfew1396
    @kungfew1396 Před 3 měsíci +1

    When they showed the bad guys his photo and it was Mark in his fur with the gun I almost peed myself laughing. 🤣😭

  • @moviefanatic670
    @moviefanatic670 Před 2 lety +36

    I love Sudden Death. I think it was the first R-rated movie my parents were okay with me watching (I was 4-5 years old). The Fight between JCVD and the assassin dressed like the mascot was engraved into my tiny subconscious for years on end.

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +9

      Bloodsport, Kickboxer, Lionheart and Hard Target. They are the quintessential Van Damme movies for me.

    • @JohnDoe-wq5eu
      @JohnDoe-wq5eu Před 2 lety +2

      @@silvervalleystudios2486
      It's a shame to hear about his addiction and how it pretty much ruined his career. He used to be right up there with all the best '90s action stars. Rick James was right.

    • @melvert33
      @melvert33 Před 2 lety +4

      Can we also add Sudden Death, Universal Soldier and Timecop to the list please! He's done some cracking films over the years, Hard Target was my favourite.

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety +2

      @@melvert33 Dolphin Lundgren kinda stole the show in Universal Soldier with his charm.

    • @MsNotzi
      @MsNotzi Před rokem

      "Sudden Death" was never my jam (something about those kids irked me), but "Timecop" on the other hand...gold.

  • @dr.burtgummerfan439
    @dr.burtgummerfan439 Před 2 lety +32

    David Letterman once said, "The other night I was watching some of my old home movies, and I'll be damned if Michael Caine wasn't in the film!"

  • @Hamboarding
    @Hamboarding Před 3 měsíci +1

    2:59 I like the Forrest Taft „fire devil“ logo on his jumsuit

  • @mishu385
    @mishu385 Před 11 měsíci +1

    one of those channels that charmed me instantly with it's sense of humor.

  • @TheWhetherMan
    @TheWhetherMan Před 2 lety +37

    I'd been waiting to see ol' Seagal on here, no better channel to cover his movies 😄

    • @jarek400
      @jarek400 Před 2 lety

      Check RedEyeRevies with all Seagal movie coverd. 😅 That is something.

    • @lauragarrard919
      @lauragarrard919 Před 2 lety

      ralphthemoviemaker does a great job,too.

    • @lrts1lrts181
      @lrts1lrts181 Před 2 lety

      Mista GG is the king of reviewing Seagal movies.

  • @ClownScreams
    @ClownScreams Před 2 lety +19

    I just want to note the actual tears glinting in mark’s eyes during his hair monologue.

    • @Dreadjaws
      @Dreadjaws Před 2 lety +2

      Mark is a better actor just by fooling around than Steven Seagal is by years of trying as hard as he can.

    • @tonichan89
      @tonichan89 Před 2 lety

      Art.

  • @6sKi6z6
    @6sKi6z6 Před 2 lety +1

    I appreciate that your channel digs up all of these movies from my childhood that I've obviously forgotten about, but looked so cool at the time. I remember when this came out and it sounded so bad ass. Same thing with "Color of Night." I was 15 in 1997, so I never got to see either of these movies at the time. Now, I'm glad you suffered so I didn't have to.

  • @marshallhuffer4713
    @marshallhuffer4713 Před 7 měsíci +1

    That ending speech was parodied in the South Park episode "Over Logging" where Randy gives a speech about how we mustn't take the internet for granted and stop over-logging on, or we'll lose it forever.

  • @WhaleManMan
    @WhaleManMan Před 2 lety +27

    I feel like major studios are still open to weird movies as long as celebrities are on board.
    Remember, in 2019 we got double Will Smith.

    • @silvervalleystudios2486
      @silvervalleystudios2486 Před 2 lety

      Will Smith still hasn't redeemed himself from that terrible excuse of a movie ID4

    • @JohnDoe-wq5eu
      @JohnDoe-wq5eu Před 2 lety

      My guess is Will Smith's career is about to take a noticeable hiatus one might say. Or he might just simply retire from acting altogether.
      Honestly, considering his output as of late that might be for the best.

    • @leenoah1
      @leenoah1 Před 2 lety +3

      keep Will
      Smith and his clone Will Smith's name out your mouth!

  • @Great_White_Shork
    @Great_White_Shork Před 2 lety +26

    I would love to see a Steven Seagal movie where he is played by Will Sasso.

    • @kenrickeason
      @kenrickeason Před 2 lety +1

      Both would be perfect for a spoof film 😂😂😂😂

    • @melvert33
      @melvert33 Před 2 lety +3

      His Mad TV Seagal diner sketch is pure comedy gold!!

  • @T0ghar
    @T0ghar Před 2 lety +2

    I actually think it is one of Seagal's best movies and one of the few rewatchable ones.

    • @AmazingThor
      @AmazingThor Před 2 lety +2

      It’s his most entertaining film, but not because it’s in any way “good”

  • @someguyfromsomewhere
    @someguyfromsomewhere Před 2 lety +1

    14:57 Had to pause the video. Tell my wife and kids that I'm going on a perilous journey and I may not return. After driving for days, then hiking for days, I stood on a ridge overlooking a serene valley. Then and only then did I allow myself to laugh so uncontrollably that I broke my ribs and passed out from the pain, only to awaken in the hospital with my family around me crying, only to utter my final words: that pic was hilarious. I have no.......regrets ☠️☠️☠️

  • @darkside3744
    @darkside3744 Před 2 lety +11

    God bless my Mom, she loved Steven Segal. I took her to see this in the theaters when it came out. Never saw him again. I think Glimmer Man was around the same time but we avoided that.

  • @FeastForThought
    @FeastForThought Před 2 lety +60

    Steven Seagal was always kinda too goofy for me to buy him as an "Action Hero", this is also why I wasn't suprised when he didn't show up in the Expendables lol

    • @TheLakabanzaichrg
      @TheLakabanzaichrg Před 2 lety +5

      In one of his movies he's supposedly lifting plates off screen, he uses every trick imaginable to look tough

    • @mauricedavis2160
      @mauricedavis2160 Před 2 lety +1

      I feel the same way about Mr Segal and his ilk Rudy von Claude dam etc...!!!🙏😵‍💫🤔

    • @rebelwithoutaclue9387
      @rebelwithoutaclue9387 Před 2 lety +6

      He turned goofy real quick, but as a kid around 13 his first two movies were so cool to me! That scene where he beats up those mobsters with the pool ball in a sock 🤣👍

    • @LunchboxNobodies
      @LunchboxNobodies Před 2 lety +1

      😀😁

    • @classyredneckcinema9327
      @classyredneckcinema9327 Před 2 lety +3

      He was supposed to be the villain in the first film with Jackie Chan but he had a lawsuit against millennium films and since Steven didn't do it Jackie backed out also so just imagine how different the original expendables would be

  • @whoelsebutmeofcoursei
    @whoelsebutmeofcoursei Před 2 lety +2

    Your bit at the end convinced me to subscribe, you put so much work in these videos

  • @AltClev37
    @AltClev37 Před 2 lety +2

    Man, you deserve more subs. Your videos are pretty funny/ entertaining lol.

  • @keiichi8191
    @keiichi8191 Před 2 lety +73

    Somehow I feel like "the native tribe perpetrated a terror attack to blow up the refinery, killing hundreds of people in the process" would probably be a pretty effective argument that the company could use to maintain their oil rights despite technically failing to complete the refinery by the stipulated deadline.

    • @lutherheggs451
      @lutherheggs451 Před 2 lety

      Well it does take place in Murica, and with the way Murica treats anyone who is other than white. Republiklan protesters would have white knighted for the corporation they gain nothing from because they're imbeciles who don't know the difference between climate and weather while calling climate change a "lib hoax" who would have paid off the government to kick the native Americans off of the land allowing them to freely drill every where they wanted until they completely screw the climate.

    • @soulknife20
      @soulknife20 Před 2 lety +7

      Right. But that would be interesting. And Steven Seagal can't have that.

    • @JohnDoe-wq5eu
      @JohnDoe-wq5eu Před 2 lety

      @@soulknife20
      I read that last part in his voice.
      The man is a walking, talking giant ego. The funniest part is I feel like life did to him exactly what he deserved.

    • @JohnDoe-wq5eu
      @JohnDoe-wq5eu Před 2 lety +2

      @@FionavanDahl
      If only Steven Seagal hadn't lost all credibility, celebrity status, and hadn't gained like 200 lbs. This was pretty much the last time he was taken even remotely seriously by anyone. 5 or so years later he was making low budget garbage movies.

  • @michelleruhl2595
    @michelleruhl2595 Před 2 lety +21

    Steven Seagal: protect the environment!!
    Also Steven Seagal: thinks blowing up an oil rig and lots of natural features of the land is a good way to do that

  • @daveroche6522
    @daveroche6522 Před rokem +1

    4:20 Ah yes - the excellent Dr. Cox - also caught moonlighting as one of the Two Bobs in 'Office Space' - GREAT!

  • @futuremovieactor
    @futuremovieactor Před 11 měsíci +1

    This movie's a trip to say the least. It's unfathomable how mind-numbling wrong it went. Parts of it kind of work in spite of things, but others because of how badly they're presented-and also in no way helped by how unbelievably messed everything else ultimately is too.

  • @joeconti2396
    @joeconti2396 Před 2 lety +3

    Dude. Sudden Death is a classic. JCVD beating up Iceburgh will never be topped

  • @soliunasmIReturns
    @soliunasmIReturns Před 2 lety +7

    There isn't a truer statement than 4:30. Seeing him in anything else immediately just makes me see him as Dr. Cox and I'm waiting for either a joke or for him to give a lesson to someone. He was so good in Scrubs.

  • @shootinputin6332
    @shootinputin6332 Před 2 lety +2

    I watched the heck out of this movie as a kid. Loved it. Obviously, only his movies like Under Siege, Above the Law, etc, stand the test of time. That is not to say that On Deadly Ground was ever well received by critics.

  • @s3.14dervision
    @s3.14dervision Před rokem +2

    That's creative...a man named Forrest fighting forest fires.

  • @poopagore
    @poopagore Před 2 lety +5

    14:53 "have you seen this man?!"

  • @BeatJunkie-mq1tc
    @BeatJunkie-mq1tc Před 2 lety +11

    Mark spits facts about those damn paper cuts. I'm like "oh shit papercut, oh well looks alright." Then the next day at work some spills on it and it's pure pain. Shoulda called Steven Seagal.

    • @n0m4nic
      @n0m4nic Před 2 lety +4

      I worked at a printing company. When you're there your hands are as pristine as newborn. You got home, you've solved the lament configuration.

  • @PranksterGL25
    @PranksterGL25 Před rokem +1

    omg I just noticed the picture.... well played Mark 🤣🤣

  • @guthax30
    @guthax30 Před rokem +2

    Huh. I never knew how accurate Tom segura’s impression of Steven Segal was until I saw this; he really has that awkward way of speaking where he tucks his chin in and jerks his head around.

  • @gigibythesea1133
    @gigibythesea1133 Před 2 lety +5

    Seeing a Weird Movies With Mark post notification from YT always makes the day much better - welcome back TO the show!😁

  • @feck2594
    @feck2594 Před 2 lety +9

    It always makes my day better when Mark puts out a video . Just hearing welcome back TOO the show puts a huge smile on my face .

  • @saxongreen78
    @saxongreen78 Před rokem +2

    Forrest Taft is the prototype of Forrest Gump...they just sharpened up his wit and speech skills and got Hanks to do it.

  • @Squishy876
    @Squishy876 Před 2 lety +1

    Mark really went above and beyond with the costumes on this one😅

  • @Liesmith424
    @Liesmith424 Před 2 lety +8

    "What can change the nature of a man?"
    I never knew Steven Seagull was a Planescape Torment fan.

    • @kungfew1396
      @kungfew1396 Před 2 lety +4

      Castration was my first answer but Seagal is just too deep for me to appreciate his cosmic knowledge.

  • @melonie_peppers
    @melonie_peppers Před 2 lety +11

    Welcome back To the Show!
    MARK it's so crazy how you talked about Sudden Death. My sister and I were hate watching it the other day and pointing out all the 90s action clichés. It was so much fun because we were just laughing the whole time.

  • @Kroggnagch
    @Kroggnagch Před rokem +1

    14:57 “have you seen this man?” Lmfao

  • @38llee
    @38llee Před rokem

    When you describe the "bar fight scene," I laugh so hard! 😆 😂. It reminds me of watching these types of movies with my older brother when I was a kid. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @TheJmccord
    @TheJmccord Před 2 lety +12

    All I see now is what Neil Breen would do with a Hollywood budget

  • @JustinStinoStamosZamora42

    I I love that you mentioned Jaws: The Revenge. That was the review that introduced me to your channel back in late 2014.

    • @melvert33
      @melvert33 Před 2 lety +2

      There's the great Michael Caine quote about Jaws 4 " I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However I have seen the house that it built and it is terrific"

  • @gzz8551
    @gzz8551 Před 2 lety

    3:34 wow that is some tremendous special effects. I love how the water interacts with the base of the oil rig.

  • @mozzie2729
    @mozzie2729 Před 2 lety +5

    Wow, I totally forgot this movie until you starting showing scenes. I remember that my father loved Steven Seagal movies, no matter how bad they were, he'd always rent them and this was one of the turds he brought home for movie night. I want my childhood movie nights back, father.

  • @rickard234
    @rickard234 Před 2 lety +11

    I am completely ready to go down the Steven Seagal rabbit hole with Mark as my guide

  • @Gideun
    @Gideun Před 2 lety +11

    Yet another great video and great skits. The fact that your skits aren't "perfect" is what makes them great.
    Side note; One day I went to our Local Video Rental (up hill both ways), I asked if they had any Kung Fu movies, and they showed me their Steven Seagal Selection...

  • @grapelund
    @grapelund Před rokem

    Jennings decides to just walk away!!”
    Idk why, but I’m dying laughing at this!!!😂😂😂😂

  • @Cajun.Yankee
    @Cajun.Yankee Před 2 lety +2

    "if it's a job, I'll take it. If it pays, I'll do it" - Michael Caine

  • @SergeTheGod
    @SergeTheGod Před 2 lety +36

    Interesting... Steven just blow up an oil rig. Polluted the hell out of this region, killed lots and lots of fish and other see life, and I don't mention cute, innocent, penguins! And only then delivered environmental speech... Great job.

    • @ekswfrenwn7
      @ekswfrenwn7 Před 2 lety +6

      I wanted to nitpick on your comment and say that there’s no penguins in the Northern Hemisphere but in this movie it wouldn’t surprise me if they were

    • @flaccidego4291
      @flaccidego4291 Před rokem +2

      That was supposed to be the sequal.Steven Seagal saves the Alaskan penguin from global warming

  • @dragon_ninja_2186
    @dragon_ninja_2186 Před 2 lety +3

    20:40 *blows up cliff*
    “This guy’s good.”

  • @leomunoz529
    @leomunoz529 Před 2 lety

    dude that bit at the end explaining your costume was the best. Keep up the awesome work Mark!

  • @aVerveQuest
    @aVerveQuest Před rokem +1

    Someone needs to count the exact # of times Seagal has said "im sorry", or even "my bad"" in total throughout his million films. I think this is the first I've ever heard