The best way to accept a compliment: how to not feel awkward and embarrassed

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  • čas přidán 25. 08. 2024
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    For some folks, it's harder to accept a compliment than criticism. In this episode, I'll discuss a trick I use to receive compliments without embarrassment or vanity. Basically, I flexibly shift my perspective to join with the complimenter in appreciation of whatever is being complimented. By doing so, I can share in the experience of appreciation without being a passive receptacle for praise. And this is important because receiving a compliment well can be a gift to the complimenter.
    Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
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    #compliments #praise #awkward

Komentáře • 42

  • @idlehourlinda6476
    @idlehourlinda6476 Před 2 lety +29

    I've noticed the kindness and thoughtfulness you exhibit when replying to the many complimentary comments below your videos; always sincere and appreciative. You're an excellent role model on how to respond to a compliment! 💕

  • @domsberisha
    @domsberisha Před 2 lety +15

    Doc! This is brilliant. I have always accepted compliments with a sincere “thank you”. Since your video, I began implementing your ideas and the results are really cool. Me elaborating on the compliment opens a dialogue a bit more.

    • @psychacks
      @psychacks  Před 2 lety +4

      Excellent! Glad to hear that it's helping you.

  • @handsomeX
    @handsomeX Před rokem +4

    I just say "Thank you very much. I really appreciate it". And smile.

  • @denaab9440
    @denaab9440 Před 2 lety +7

    Thanks for making the distinction between flattery and sincerity. I’ll work on flexibility of perspective!

    • @psychacks
      @psychacks  Před 2 lety

      Thanks for watching, Dena. Keep coming back!

  • @eierinjhoi
    @eierinjhoi Před 2 lety +10

    Thank you for this video. I was recently complimented on my physique, someone saying that I don't look like someone who have 3 kids. I accepted the compliment as I've been working out and eating healthy. Normally, I would brush compliments off

  • @JoseBalderrama-sy4ww
    @JoseBalderrama-sy4ww Před 8 měsíci +2

    I have made a point of referencing compliments. I'm a little indifferent to praise but I like it okay so it made sense to me that I should give praise right back. I don't want to devalue anyone especially those that are praising me

  • @maria.1313
    @maria.1313 Před 2 lety +7

    I really love the way you explained this! It definitely makes it less uncomfortable to receive a compliment. Thank you!

    • @psychacks
      @psychacks  Před 2 lety

      I'm glad you found it useful :)

  • @luticino3094
    @luticino3094 Před 2 lety +1

    This is a super important topic that is seldom addressed. I've mostly received criticism throughout my life, so they are easier to handle since I have practiced receiving them and I'm pretty good at being critical at myself. I am ill-equipped however at receiving compliments, so I usually dismiss them, don't believe them and sometimes, do not actually hear the message. This scratches the surface and is helpful, but I feel I could read an entire book on the subject, if you were to write one, so I can rehabilitate myself on this behavior. Thank you so much for posting this content.

  • @AnRodz
    @AnRodz Před rokem

    Wow, you say it so natural - as I also believe it should be - "... if you have any grace, you open the gift and show some gratitude"... etc... There is a parenting style that wont teach kids to be grateful for gifts. It's not to force the kid to say "thank you" without feeling it, is to teach them to be grateful for being the object of someone else's kindness; open the gift and carefully notice any detail about it". Very easy to do, yet many are so cold-hearted.

  • @JoseBalderrama-sy4ww
    @JoseBalderrama-sy4ww Před 8 měsíci

    This video has been helpful. I have thought of myself in a grandiose way and in a hateful way. Receiving praise from others is both humiliating and humiliating. I never really thought about the way others perceive me. It must be awesome

  • @rickybobby3988
    @rickybobby3988 Před rokem +1

    Ur content is priceless! I’ve always felt awkward receiving them. After you explained it , it really makes sense

  • @ThatGreenLyfe
    @ThatGreenLyfe Před 2 lety +5

    *smashes the like button before even watching the video cuz I know it’s about to be 🔥*

  • @zensvlognotapro
    @zensvlognotapro Před 2 lety +2

    I'm thankful when someone compliment me and I return it with a compliment too . I believe in reciprocity 🤗
    Peace and love to All 👍🧡

  • @arjunmrao4039
    @arjunmrao4039 Před 2 lety +2

    Wonderful Explanation , Thank You ....

  • @cheese.hamburger
    @cheese.hamburger Před rokem

    Imagine having Doc as your father, you’d be one of the most advanced kids in your age group 🤣🙈💯💝 Thanks Doc for sharing your knowledge with us for free! ✨You bring value into our lives. 💎

  • @SQRH3
    @SQRH3 Před 7 měsíci

    Cool! I have to try this

  • @joyandpeacefullaughter5307

    Most people complement so you can compliment them back or self deprecate. It's crazy how I see more people calling all self deprecation humility

  • @JAdams-jx5ek
    @JAdams-jx5ek Před rokem

    Very well said. I will try to use this.

  • @PharmacyTechLabs
    @PharmacyTechLabs Před 2 lety +4

    I love the back handed compliments because I give them right back.

    • @joyandpeacefullaughter5307
      @joyandpeacefullaughter5307 Před 2 lety

      😂

    • @cherylwade264
      @cherylwade264 Před rokem

      Some people don't understand
      a backhanded compliment.
      They grow up with criticism
      and sarcasm so they don't
      understand the offense.
      Some people really were trying
      to give a compliment.

    • @PharmacyTechLabs
      @PharmacyTechLabs Před rokem

      @@cherylwade264 Nope! Wrong.

    • @cherylwade264
      @cherylwade264 Před rokem

      @@PharmacyTechLabs
      Intentional snide remarks are different.
      There is a You Tuber who does
      videos of her dance/workout group.
      She is a plus sized girl "but" the
      girl can really dance.
      Our minds are familiar with plus
      sized people having a hard time
      moving around.
      Not someone moving as
      gracefully as she does.

  • @ElissaPancoe
    @ElissaPancoe Před 2 lety +1

    Could you please make a video where you explain how flattery is a form of mockery? I don't understand how that works.

  • @bolt9110
    @bolt9110 Před 11 měsíci

    Say, you're welcome

  • @kevingruenofficial
    @kevingruenofficial Před rokem

    Listen up ladies!

  • @jorgearg8701
    @jorgearg8701 Před rokem

    Can you go more with flattery / mockery? thank you

  • @tiecoolguy
    @tiecoolguy Před 12 dny

    I like this and yet im confused about how i feel about objectifying myself in general 😂

  • @THEBATZZ
    @THEBATZZ Před rokem

    So in the movie Batman , Jack Nicholson who plays the joker is fixing his tie while looking in the mirror. The woman he’s with looks over his shoulder and said , you look fine.
    Jack turns to her and said , I didn’t ask. Would this be the proper way to accept a compliment? 😃

  • @FrescoFD
    @FrescoFD Před rokem

    I just notice that you almost laugh. Hahaha!

  • @oceansoflorewi
    @oceansoflorewi Před 2 lety

    As someone on the attractive side, its honestly getting tiring to be called 'Handsome'. Once I hear it either I think ok what now? What if the person who said it i'm not interested in? Fake a response? Ignore? Say thank you then end the convo (also rude). Only attractive people understand the pressure of AGENDA. There's always something needy or dark behind a nice compliment- a unwanted nude photo, pressure to date you. I'm sick of it! I want a compliment AFTER someone gets to know me and not a random first initial message. You don't know me- don't praise my appearance. Stick around and give me some moments so I can earn your compliment. Otherwise it just feels like a drive-by.

    • @psychacks
      @psychacks  Před 2 lety +4

      If you're handsome, people are going to compliment your appearance. Or, if you're an athlete, your athleticism; or, if you're an author, your writing, etc. When people get complimented, they tend to get complimented in the same ways over and over again. That's just the way it is. In reality, everyone has an agenda. And the more you have what other people want, the more often you will likely have to frustrate those agendas. However unpleasant this might be, it's always preferable to be in a position to turn people down than to accept a suboptimal outcome from lack of optionality.

    • @cherylwade264
      @cherylwade264 Před rokem

      @@psychacks
      Thank you for the interesting video.
      Could you address the issue of a man
      giving a woman he hardly knows a gift because he is attracted to her and she refuses the gift because of the intent
      of the gift
      He might feel offended but if she
      does not intend to reciprocate his
      feelings is she wrong.
      Should she politely accept and possibly
      lead him to think he is more than
      a friend?
      Is it offensive if she says , thank you
      how much is it I can pay you for it?

  • @Philmoscowitz
    @Philmoscowitz Před 21 hodinou

    This is bad advice. The best way to receive a compliment is to say thank you and follow it up with some humble or even self-deprecating remark.