The Lonely Convert, The Lonely Jew- Interview with Rabbi David Bar-Hayim

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  • čas přidán 15. 06. 2013
  • Interview with Machon Shilo's Rabbi David Bar-Hayim
    Visit us at www.MachonShilo.org
    Want to find out about Rabbi David Bar-Hayim's Eretz-Yisraeli, geula-mode approach to Torah? You MUST read the following:
    machonshilo.org/en/eng/compone...
    Find it difficult to understand why some Ashkenazim do not eat kitniyot on Passover? Watch the following interview with Rabbi David Bar-Hayim:
    • Gearing up for Pesach ...

Komentáře • 522

  • @benavraham4397
    @benavraham4397 Před rokem +69

    I converted to Judaism 46 years ago in Jerusalem at age 18. It was very lonely and diffecult. A convert to Judaism must be a strong person inside.
    It is said that a convert is like a new born baby. I feel that is true. My life started over again, and what I had from before was not of much use. My old self died. I developed into a new person.
    HaShem wants converts to Judaism. It is not enough having Jews that were born Jewish. Every convert must keep in mind, "I am doing a specific service for HaShem that only I as a convert can do. My dumb questions must be asked, and people must break their heads to answer them. I make mistakes and learn. I am here to show that Judaism is more than family trdition. Judaism the the truth, which is higher than any family bond. Just as Abraham and Sara left their tribe to follow HaShem, I personally follow in their path."

    • @elenatramsti5176
      @elenatramsti5176 Před 6 měsíci +4

      My friend, you bring fresh and important thought and energy to the Jewish people. I am sorry it was lonely and difficult but we Jews can become quite insular and very often our religious practice is more out of habit and family tradition than religious and spiritual dedication. Our culture is often more important than our religion. We also deal with an innate feeling that non-Jews are different from us and it takes time to accept them and let our guard down. This is our fault -- not that of the converts but please understand why that is. Most Jews were brought up in an atmosphere where they were taught about all the difficulties and persecutions their parents, grandparents and more distant relatives went through and this has affected us very much. We consider that heritage to be as important as the religion itself. It is often very difficult for born Jews to understand why others would want to become a Jew, being as it is so hard and often quite lonely. Thank you for your strength, wisdom and most of all your presence in our tribe.

    • @RickArendt
      @RickArendt Před měsícem +2

      "I am here to show that Judaism is more than family tradition..." Wow... well said and so very true!

  • @aquariusfriar
    @aquariusfriar Před 2 lety +46

    It's very hard when you convert and don't have any Jewish family. That's been my experience.

    • @debrapaulino918
      @debrapaulino918 Před 2 lety +2

      Little did I know @age 6 this is where my journey would bring me. I now realize how pivotal and big it was to firmly for all time and in a nano second never teach my children if ever I them that.there is a Santa. B'H to my soul. I left all of it.

    • @debrapaulino918
      @debrapaulino918 Před 2 lety +2

      I relate to the loneliness. It's complicated.

    • @onebraveheartlion
      @onebraveheartlion Před 2 lety +1

      I've been so welcome by the members of our local synagogue. Maybe join a Torah study group if you haven't.

    • @heatherwiner2883
      @heatherwiner2883 Před 10 měsíci +2

      I can join all the clubs and do all the things and it is still lonely on Shabbat and holidays. Why I wanted to make Aliyah. I go to Shabbat and minyan services regularly but it does not make up for the loneliness.

  • @heatherwiner2883
    @heatherwiner2883 Před 10 lety +211

    I am lonely because I am a single woman without a Jewish family. Judaism is more geared towards the family. On Friday night there is no one to have a Shabbat dinner with or to even light the candles. Very difficult as all of these customs or practices are not reinforced with me. I am lonelier now than before I converted.

    • @annmajor379
      @annmajor379 Před 10 lety +18

      Do you live near a university with a Hillel? I understand what you are saying and I have often lived in small communities where Hillel is a great place to find a Jewish community although summers are quiet. There may be other single Jews in your community who may be looking for an opportunity to share Shabbat. It might be an opportunity to start a small group that gets together once or twice a month.

    • @heatherwiner2883
      @heatherwiner2883 Před 10 lety +29

      *****
      Thanks for replying. Is Hillel just for college students? I am middle aged. there are very few single Jews in my community. I don't even think they celebrate Friday night Shabbat. I think I need to move closer to Boston to a bigger community. Not possible right now because I can not leave my elderly mother. I had always heard how welcoming Jewish people were to their homes for Shabbat. I have yet to be invited to one Shabbat dinner but I have been invited to a Passover dinner.

    • @annmajor379
      @annmajor379 Před 10 lety +23

      Feell free to email me at annmariemajor@gmail.com. Hillel is not just for college students. I have often participated in Hillel activities and "older" adults are welcomed as it provides role models for students. We can chat more through email and I'll be happy to support you.

    • @wrestlersnotdivas2172
      @wrestlersnotdivas2172 Před 9 lety +4

      From what did you convert?

    • @heatherwiner2883
      @heatherwiner2883 Před 9 lety +9

      Wrestlers Not Divas Christian. Mother is Protestant. Father was Jewish.

  • @orchidsrosesg_disone4431
    @orchidsrosesg_disone4431 Před rokem +16

    I am studying for Converting! My great grandfather was Jewish but fully assimilated away from ✡️ Judaism.

  • @thomasrussell4674
    @thomasrussell4674 Před 2 lety +13

    Rabbi David Bar-Hayim, you are a man of true sincerity! A true pure hearted person. Respect to you.

  • @benavrahamyitzchak8433
    @benavrahamyitzchak8433 Před 5 lety +21

    I'm a convert. I keep the commands. Yet as a cappuccino colour Jew I'm not welcome. It's tough but I never quit

    • @Green-zw9pv
      @Green-zw9pv Před 5 lety +4

      benavrahamyitzchak // Why don’t you find a different religion. Maybe the right religion this time. Find a inclusive religion where people of different races, nations and tribes are welcomed ....
      We are all from Adam and God made Adam from clay. Clay is what we humans and animals step on with our feet when we walk and since Adam is made out of this worthless material, it just shows that humans have no right to be phonetic and racist towards each other. This is why Abrahamic faiths burry their dead in the ground because this is where we initially belong.
      Don’t become a jew, you wont find a niche within any of their sinister communities. Its a tribally exclusive religion (just like sikhism) and you are not welcomed. If it was the right religion and the religion of God, you would expect a Jew to be knocking on your door asking you to become a jew just like a evangelical or a muslim would do. But no, its a tribal religion. God doesn’t see skin colour and tribe affiliations which just proves Judaism to be a false religion.
      Seek God first.Learn all sorts of religions. Read the scriptures of every religion out there (very important). And pray to God, asking him for guidance. I want you to become my religion which would make you my brother but i would not give you orders to do so. All I recommend you to do is search deeply into the different religions. Don’t be stubborn on the preconceptions you already have and try to absorb new information until you are guided to the right religion

    • @benavrahamyitzchak8433
      @benavrahamyitzchak8433 Před 5 lety

      @@Green-zw9pv what is your religion? Excellent words of encouragement

    • @zlcju
      @zlcju Před 4 lety +3

      @@benavrahamyitzchak8433 How are you not welcome? In Africa, they don't believe Jews can be "white"

    • @leohochhauser
      @leohochhauser Před 3 lety +3

      Check out all the different hues of brown in skin color of Israeli Jews. Also, check out Capers Funnye, rabbi of the Ethiopian Hebrew Congregation of Chicago.

    • @emilia3310
      @emilia3310 Před 3 lety +4

      Bullshit. There are many people who claim that real Jews can't be white. Stop this victim mentality.

  • @mizrachi35
    @mizrachi35 Před 5 lety +48

    This is an old recording but it still very much resonates with me in 2019. I was told at the time of my conversion that I was a free agent and not any specific community, nusach, etc. I eventually chose to be Sephardic because of very strong personal reasons. I have seen the ignorance of both rabbi and laymen. It’s said but it makes me proud to know that I have what to relay on halachikaly. Humans are human whether they are Jewish or otherwise.

  • @MusicUnlimited-ff9uf
    @MusicUnlimited-ff9uf Před 9 měsíci +8

    I converted Reform and 47 years later decided to go Orthodox. It took me a couple a years and I studied like crazy. Most people were nice, but some are very critical. I will not go into details but it was quite an experience. I was told by some that only way to be a Jew is by birth. I study more now. Carole Bracha Paul

    • @ruthietaylor8756
      @ruthietaylor8756 Před 8 měsíci +1

      Bless you and welcome!

    • @michalptacnik1
      @michalptacnik1 Před 4 měsíci +1

      The Jew by birth part should be seen as completely bogus of a statement as far as I understand things.

    • @eliavgordon2108
      @eliavgordon2108 Před 29 dny +1

      There's not a Jew on the planet who can say that they are positively / factually descended from Yaacov . ... Every single Jew has converts in their lineage !

  • @kwyzi
    @kwyzi Před 9 lety +61

    Thankfully, I converted over 40 years ago. It was and is marvelous. I would have benefited from more Talmud but being a woman did not get enough. I get it now with through amazing lectures so it is a happy story.

    • @richardhankse6450
      @richardhankse6450 Před rokem +2

      You're right 💯, I agree with you. I'm a newly converted family of Jews, It has been 1yr for me without a Jewish family. Judaism is more geared toward the family. On Friday night there is no one to have a stab at dinner with or to even light the candles.

    • @tonyrandall3146
      @tonyrandall3146 Před 11 měsíci +1

      That is nice to hear, approaching now 50 years, I hope you are enjoying a blessed life with the community.

  • @NoRushpk
    @NoRushpk Před 5 lety +14

    You have explained why, after so many years of searching for Truth and finding the Torah, I was brought ever further from God and plunged ever deeper into Spiritual darkness, both in the USA and most extremely in Israel. Im not sure converting is worth it. Thank you Rabbi..You mean much to many of us

    • @charlotteskiftun753
      @charlotteskiftun753 Před 5 lety +3

      Indiana John I m saddened by this as i want to convert....searching for more deeper truths

    • @charlotteskiftun753
      @charlotteskiftun753 Před 5 lety +2

      Indiana John ...i pray things improve greatly for you

    • @NoRushpk
      @NoRushpk Před 5 lety +7

      Charlotte Skiftun Thanks. Yes, I now see that it doesnt matter what the community is about. I distance myself from non truth seekers - they turn the label into darkness by thinking Jew = Truth. A Jew has nothing to do with truth anymore than any other person, it only depends on the individual to search for truth or not. I have Torah. Dont need Israelites. Only God.

    • @newnewsbrooklyn1513
      @newnewsbrooklyn1513 Před 5 lety +7

      I was told by a great rabbi the lubavitcher rebbe, to look at the ideals in judaism and not the people. But the trouble is you live among the people

    • @debrapaulino918
      @debrapaulino918 Před 2 lety +2

      @@NoRushpk non truth seekers are from every persuasion in life. Has nothing to do with religion or no religion but everything to do with spirit. People generally are simply not open because it may require adjusting one's beliefs and that's dangerous. So they do not respond with friendship because you're a threat no matter how nice you are. It means keeping yourself to yourself no matter where you are or who you're talking with.

  • @YisroelAvrahm
    @YisroelAvrahm Před 5 měsíci +3

    Very good explanation. Thank you for your Torah class on your perspective.

  • @calmend2449
    @calmend2449 Před 10 lety +27

    As a convert i must admit that it is not that Jews do not accept converts,
    they DO accept converts, but they key is that they are looking for originality in a convert.
    many people want to convert to judaism sometimes because of other reasons
    such as access to money, or fame or a spouse who is forcing conversion.
    I think if someone wants to convert to judaism, it MUST COME FROM THE HEART.

  • @margarita8416
    @margarita8416 Před 6 lety +9

    thank you for encouraging us to be more involved with different opinions

  • @DonZusyaGoodman
    @DonZusyaGoodman Před 10 lety +11

    Baruch Hashem!!!
    A very brave approach to a problem that will not go away until the wonderful element of Teshoova permeates our hearts and minds!!!

  • @bernardorodriguez4285
    @bernardorodriguez4285 Před rokem +2

    I also must say that you are the calmest person I have ever seen!

  • @levi7187
    @levi7187 Před 6 lety +19

    Thank you Rabbi Bar-Hayim! I have decided to leave Christianity and I hope that whatever Rabbi does my conversion is as openminded as you are!

    • @elenatramsti5176
      @elenatramsti5176 Před 6 měsíci +1

      I don't know why you are leaving Christianity but keep in mind that when you do so, you are leaving a community and a social support system. This is not easy. Being Jewish in an overwhelmingly Christian environment can be very lonely. Religion is as much a social endeavor as it is a spiritual or intellectual one. Being Jewish carries with it a lot of heavy emotional stuff -- especially in times of unrest and turmoil which we are in the midst of. Have you thought of being a Noahide?

  • @psjasker
    @psjasker Před 4 dny

    What a deeply reflective and thoughtful man!

  • @fancyfred
    @fancyfred Před 10 lety +7

    I know of a orthodox convert who was told by a Chabad rabbi that he couldn't be a Jew if he didn't believe the Lubavticher Rebbe was Moshiach.

    • @Chanaaaaa442
      @Chanaaaaa442 Před 4 lety +2

      There are many crazy people out there.. not everyone with titul or hat knows everything

  • @ladanweheliye5688
    @ladanweheliye5688 Před 6 lety +3

    Insightful. Good Shabbos, Rabbi David!

  • @caseystevens445
    @caseystevens445 Před rokem +6

    The love of Torah, Hashem and Israel is sincerely what drives my passion for conversion. Situations such as the one you described are incredibly discouraging and questionable. I'd hope that nor any other would be put in such a compromising situation . There is always a better way.

  • @msnetarose
    @msnetarose Před 11 lety +7

    Thank you for this intelligent response to such a sensitive topic.

  • @wandatierman125
    @wandatierman125 Před 10 lety +35

    As a convert to Judaism, the convert is not accepted easily. And hardships are difficult for the convert. Such as moving into pricey Jewish neighborhoods, Not having a Yeshiva education and looked down upon isn't exactly comforting. When a person loses compassion, their religion, is worthless. I buck the waves on both sides, Christians and Jews. Love is greater than a haughty heart. I will preserver. B'H

    • @satoshibitcoinsaki6532
      @satoshibitcoinsaki6532 Před 4 lety +2

      They are converts too. The Ashkenazis converted in kaazaaria 800 years ago according to my friends Winthrop and Humberto. They have no right to look down on you! They are not from the Middle East either.

    • @marcoantunes4951
      @marcoantunes4951 Před 4 lety +8

      Dror Levi that’s not true. King David great grandmother Ruth was a convert, Moses wife was a convert, onkelos was a convert and many of the rabbis were descendants of converts. By Heaven what you say astonishes me. What ignorance and such words violate the Torah commandment to accept the convert as a fellow equal Jew and to love the convert. All modern Jewish communities have convert blood in them, why do you think Russian Jews look white and Moroccan Jews darker. May Hashem forgive your arrogance.

    • @IsaBoo2511
      @IsaBoo2511 Před 4 lety +2

      @@marcoantunes4951 Bless you for proclaiming the truth. Some self-proclaimed Jews by "blood" are truly a shame to Judaism. Saintly hypocrites, arrogant bullies, racist and ignorant. In another post he trashed converts by saying "they were just slaves" to true jews and to go back to their own race.

    • @BertGraef
      @BertGraef Před 3 lety

      @Dror Levi Talmudism is not biblical Judaism.

    • @RudydeGroot
      @RudydeGroot Před 3 lety

      @@BertGraef There can never be such a thing as 'biblical' talmudism. Judaism is not based on the christian bible with all its (deliberate) faulty translations. Judaism is based on tenach which was carefully copied from generations to generations.

  • @yaaqovasher
    @yaaqovasher Před 11 lety +6

    this is why i love Rav Bar-Hayim's approach. we have a chance to unite as one by leaving certain differences thay were picked up in galuth behind and adopting minhagim of Eretz Yisrael from long ago.

  • @rivkacoverdale9672
    @rivkacoverdale9672 Před 8 lety +13

    Thank you. Your words are very thoughtful and considerate.

    • @richardhankse6450
      @richardhankse6450 Před rokem

      You're right 💯, I agree with you. I'm a newly converted family of the Jews, It has been 1yr for me.

  • @amoswittenbergsmusings
    @amoswittenbergsmusings Před rokem +5

    Full disclosure: I am a convert since age 24. I'm 71 years old now with many many children and grandchildren who, praise God, are your regular citizens of the Jewish people, of the "yeshivish" hue.
    I have not personally experienced the things discussed in this video but i recognise them very well.
    My take on the matter is that we Jews tend to identify Judaism with the Jewish way of life. In truth, there is the *faith* if Israel and there is the *people* of Israel. They are not synonymous. Many converts, especially those like myself who found Torah *because of* their discovery of real biblical truth, embrace the faith before embracing the people.
    Gentiles should realise that converts are the only people on earth who *must* embrace both. Born Jews are Jews even when, God forbid, atheists. Gentiles can embrace the faith without the peculiar way of life and are often well advised to choose that path.

  • @kristokirov
    @kristokirov Před 5 lety +1

    Great video!

  • @bwiener5711
    @bwiener5711 Před 4 lety +1

    13:00 woow!!! So so so good!! Beautiful words amazing video!!

  • @sennahoj777
    @sennahoj777 Před 4 lety +2

    Thanks for the warning!

  • @heidivernathorbjrnsen4745
    @heidivernathorbjrnsen4745 Před 10 lety +4

    Thank You, Rabbi.

  • @honeysweetnectar
    @honeysweetnectar Před 11 lety +3

    this was a great video, thank you.

    • @PublicTVChannel
      @PublicTVChannel Před 4 lety

      I want to convert to juidism a d want to marry you

  • @brucecorman7304
    @brucecorman7304 Před 6 lety +1

    Thank you 🙏

  • @ahavahyisrael
    @ahavahyisrael Před 6 lety +6

    I am hearing in this video that what the rabbi is saying stems from the fact that Jews these days are suffering from a disconnect from our traditions after the Shoah and because of assimilation, and so we don't generally feel confident about our traditions, and in fact become suffocating in our need to be "correct" halachically, since so many Jews are baalei teshuvah, and since there is a problem with tearing away from the center and making up our own mini 'religions', so a perceived need for conformity becomes widespread and oppressive.

  • @samuelralphallen7450
    @samuelralphallen7450 Před 8 lety +35

    BRAVO RABBI ! I was a fundamental Christian for sixty years, and throughout those years, I always felt misguided. But after fifteen months of pursuing conversion, and when I volunteered to serve the synagogue with my skills and was fully accepted by the top officers - my Rabbi kicked clean across street (i.e. rejection). The message I received is converts are second-class Jews. Why couldn't this Rabbi be my mentor?

    • @BertGraef
      @BertGraef Před 8 lety +2

      +Samuel Ralph Allen you mistakenly converted to Talmudism. Christianity is true bible Judaism. Talmudism is the religion of antichrist.

    • @samuelralphallen7450
      @samuelralphallen7450 Před 8 lety +22

      Right - and your polyethylene messiah will save us all.

    • @BertGraef
      @BertGraef Před 8 lety

      +Samuel Ralph Allen you are hoodwinked by Talmudists who hate the only Messiah they will ever get, polyethylene or not.

    • @samuelralphallen7450
      @samuelralphallen7450 Před 8 lety +21

      I have only one God: Adonai-Elohim or Hashem Maleck - yours is a construction of men with creative minds and ulterior motives.

    • @samuelralphallen7450
      @samuelralphallen7450 Před 8 lety +12

      We should never degrade another religion unless it attacks our own - and then only insofar as it does attack our own

  • @bobrien1108
    @bobrien1108 Před 2 lety +2

    Thank you

  • @helendudden9638
    @helendudden9638 Před 8 lety +40

    I wish I could convert with someone like you.

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety

      Hi! Did you found someone to convert you? I may have option for you. Give me an email so i can get in touch with you.

    • @catweazle3464
      @catweazle3464 Před 5 lety

      Armando Alcázar
      I don’t know about him, but I would like to inquire as to what you have to offer.

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety

      @@catweazle3464 send me an email.

    • @conner7939
      @conner7939 Před 5 lety

      @@ormand.943 hey do you think you could help me I am only 13 but have been looking for faith and had a dream and have finally found faith and would like to be converted

    • @conner7939
      @conner7939 Před 5 lety

      @@ormand.943 it email needed my email is connercowan05@gmail.com if you could help me I would appreciate it thankyou

  • @anthonyben-yah9745
    @anthonyben-yah9745 Před 4 lety +3

    WITH THE LORD I CAN DO ALL THINGS. ANYTHING YOU CAN DO I CAN DO BETTER, AMEN AND AMEN, HALLELU YAH!

  • @yaaqovasher
    @yaaqovasher Před 11 lety +14

    my personal advice to the convert is to learn the ways of the community you are in and respect them and do what you believe is most correct in private at home, with the guidance of a good Rav.

  • @BuckshotLaFunke1
    @BuckshotLaFunke1 Před 9 lety +7

    Dear Rabbi, many thanks for your sincere opinion. In the wake of Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav's teaching and a Jewish philosopher such as Jacques Derrida I feel that the answer is the enemy of the question, if it does not lead to a new question. I hope I understood you well. Best to you.

  • @72Yonatan
    @72Yonatan Před 11 lety +12

    Even a Jew who converts to another faith and repudiates his Judaism is considered Jewish by us. He has simply lost his mind and we hope it is temporary. But nothing about his behavior is considered "Jewish" or commendable. His behavior itself is not the issue. The identity of a person is from the level of the soul, the neshumah. and it is a spiritual identity, not a physical one.

  • @bernardorodriguez4285
    @bernardorodriguez4285 Před rokem +2

    This internal conflict between Jewish lineages and traditions is so toxic. Thanks for your video.

  • @ayrsine
    @ayrsine Před rokem +8

    This video has helped tremendously because I am that kind of person. The type that thinks and thinks critically and also one who respects the rule of law. However, as an ex-Christian I have suffered a lot of heartache and mental anguish over how easily one can be fooled and how much that changed my life indefinitely and the lives of those around me. So I would NEVER take lightly impositions from a self righteous attitude or person toward how I express my love for Hashem and Judaism. I have an eternal debt to Judaism for “saving” me out of Christianity, ironically.

    • @1995yuda
      @1995yuda Před rokem +3

      Judaism is indeed the ONLY "religious" home for true seekers and critical thinkers and people who don't/won't believe but demand to KNOW things. You come to Judaism when you want the REAL stuff. 4,000 years ago Judaism started as a counter-religious religion hellbent on cleansing humanity from magical thinking and false beliefs and idolatry and indeed the mission has been successful.

  • @robertmason6366
    @robertmason6366 Před 5 lety +4

    This Rabbi is very intelligent and he's the modern day Meir Kahane.

  • @Achdus5772
    @Achdus5772 Před 10 lety +17

    My husband and I are Orthodox converts. Since then we have been part of a MO congregation. But I must tell you, I do not like the labels and the discrimination and friction between Jews that it causes. We have a Chabad near by and some have said they wouldn't step foot into the place. Apparently they don't have good enough education as higher degrees and places like Harvard and Yale rank higher than righteous Torah observance. This said despite the fact the rabbi there recently was tested for and became a Dayan in Israel. No wonder we are all still in galut without a Temple.

    • @MOOSEDOWNUNDER
      @MOOSEDOWNUNDER Před 10 lety +4

      Hi, I was born a Jew but British Jew of Finnish/German heritage, did not really learn much about it until i was much older, Mum was Jewish and Dad so 100% legit. Later in life (after marrying a Ozzie Catholic) i decided to go back to my faith, i live in Melbourne now and am welcome in Conservative and Orthodox Shul's. I work all over the world and have always found the Chabad houses welcoming, my Hebrew is pants, i did not know the prayers or what to do, i was just honest with the Rabbi and said "hay, im a crap jew but i am trying to get better" The Chabad Rabbi's in Colombo Sri Lanka, Lagos Nigeria and even Algeirs Algeria laughed and welcomed me to Shabbat dinner. Thats a Chabad house to me. Not sure if its the Finnish connection? they were Chabad but i knew nothing about it. lol. Give it a go and be honest with the Rabbi's.

    • @rightcheer5096
      @rightcheer5096 Před 2 lety

      Sounds just like my Baptist church, only with less of a knitting circle of church ladies.

  • @ankuchaskathesalmon9428
    @ankuchaskathesalmon9428 Před 4 lety +1

    I like this rabbi

  • @hannahoron9740
    @hannahoron9740 Před 4 lety +10

    Since my 17th year I wanted to convert to Judaism, only to be rejected time after time. Since my 39th I actively studied halacha according to a list of books given to me by a rabbi, also I read Hebrew at university and lived according to halacha as far as possible. I am now 59 and don´t have the energy anymore because I suffer from chronic depression. Now the rabbi´s say that I am not motivated enough ... I cannot understand this ... really I don´t.

    • @tbishop4961
      @tbishop4961 Před 2 lety +5

      Noah didn't ask any rabbi's permission to enter into covenant with God. Neither did Abraham
      Too many people trying to be the gatekeepers of his kingdom

    • @adlevhashamayim4694
      @adlevhashamayim4694 Před rokem +2

      Whoa that is insane. If you’re still interested I am sure my rabbi would love to help you find someone. My heart goes out to you.

    • @avalerie4467
      @avalerie4467 Před 5 měsíci

      Ask the shul if they are offering Torah classes for Noachides. I know most Chabad Houses do. Chabad does not do conversions, but very welcoming to the Noachides.
      Also, you may be interested in the Noachide World Center in Jerusalem
      The Rosh Yeshiva is Rav Oury Choukry ( my spelling may be wrong, i apologize).
      There are some things Noachides are not obligated to keep, but we keep Sheva Mitzvot HaChem.
      Shalom

  • @rabinato
    @rabinato Před 4 lety +4

    Hello there, sorry for a late comment on that video, I didn't know the rabbi's work before - most ideas you preach are rather impressive and match pretty much most that I've learned in my family, so I've been delving in my comfort zone until now - but here in this present video you've left me perplexed with this one question concerning the convert who wished to pray according to a different custom - and I'm sort of restless on that point. I mean: let's suppose such a candidate for conversion would join my congregation (I'm from a sefaradic descent) - and if I were to help him all throughout the conversion process, teach him customs and halachas and do, so to say, the hard work, just for him to leave at any moment and go for his life elsewhere, where some of the customs I gave myself the trouble to teach him will be left behind to meet his destination wherever it may be - wouldn't this be comparable somewhat to a son leaving behind his rabbi's/father's customs? And wouldn't it be more logical he goes wherever he thinks is the right place for himself a go through his conversion process there, where he'll meet the practices which he is ultimately to adopt? Wouldn't I feel like I'm cleaning other people's laundry, such as helping him for an interested purpose, not for heavens sake, only for aliyah purposes? well thank you for answering provided you have time for that. רוב ברכות ,תזכו לרב טוב ולעלות לגדולה!

    • @jvnd2785
      @jvnd2785 Před 6 měsíci +2

      Hello. I think you are right asking these questions- for they are perfectly valid ones. It is us, converts, who are here to learn, with all the humbleness that comes with it. Being humble is the key here. I cannot just come to a community that has kept certain traditions for thousands of years and then break the rules and pretend that I know better than the people I am supposed to love. It's disrespectful and unnecessary. I liken it to my experience from the past: I used to live and work on native reservation among one of the fiercest nations known to the humankind, the Dakhóta (Native American) people. A warm-hearted and generous people, but they do have some rules that everybody has to keep. One of these rules is that you never ever look directly into the eyes of an elderly person (it is considered a sign of bad manners and of aggression). You are not supposed to look at them at all but keep your gaze down and listen with your ears. It may be an odd request for somebody from a different background/culture but these are the rules by which the people live. And so you do what their cultural norms dictate. You don't have an attitude and stare into people's eyes. It's basic respect. You do not go and tell a native grandma (a word that's used for any elderly woman, not just a relative) who generously provided good things and many teachings to you that she doesn't have all the answers and that you know better/more about her own traditions than herself.
      Same thing with the convert who was unhappy with the Ashkenazi traditions. The community provided many good things for him- yet he decided to do "his own thing" and walk out on them. That's disrespectful. As converts we are here to sit and listen and learn from those who know more. Can we ask questions? Sure. But we should always ask them with the ability to listen to the answers and with a good dose of humbleness. That's what it means to love somebody.

  • @wolfshedler5898
    @wolfshedler5898 Před 5 lety +1

    good points

  • @TheAnuchild
    @TheAnuchild Před 10 lety +9

    Yes it is heartbreaking and life damaging.

  • @vdelrio999
    @vdelrio999 Před 5 lety +1

    I wholeheartedly agree.

  • @mariaearthangel7251
    @mariaearthangel7251 Před 2 lety +2

    It is arrogant to reject a serious convert as they have made a soul discussion to follow the truth and have been awakened to the laws and commitments of God...
    It wrong to generalize the person until the person has been given the opportunity to learn and follow for many souls are searching for to follow the truth

  • @luisreyes6315
    @luisreyes6315 Před 6 lety +5

    after hearing this I will only convert sephardic I have heard to many things about how ashkenazim treat converts differently like tring to marry them to other converts i hoped in my heart its because they were hoping for another akiva like teacher to emerge but no its because they think their souls come from different places when for most of my life ive heard jews say that all jews and converts are part of the same souls that were on mount sinai

    • @yourrealitycheck7464
      @yourrealitycheck7464 Před 5 lety

      Luis Reyes x

    • @my2cents49
      @my2cents49 Před 5 lety +1

      Ashkenazim tend to be harsh to their community members in general. There aren't several branches of Sephardim; a rabbi must meet all the Jews in the area. Among Ashkenazim and Hasidim, there are many branches to accommodate the biases of each community...

    • @satoshibitcoinsaki6532
      @satoshibitcoinsaki6532 Před 4 lety +1

      Sephardim are the real Jews!

    • @margaritakleinman5701
      @margaritakleinman5701 Před 2 lety +1

      @@satoshibitcoinsaki6532 And the Mizrahim especially.

  • @eathummus
    @eathummus Před 9 lety +3

    right on the money!
    I began at a Sephardic synagogue in 1996..

  • @mariaearthangel7251
    @mariaearthangel7251 Před 2 lety +1

    It’s sad that others are denied 🙅‍♀️ and great rejection as no one knows who will be successful

  • @RhonaDavis-lz3qp
    @RhonaDavis-lz3qp Před rokem +1

    🎉 Very troubling content rabbonim should be more flexible particularly with converts but also with others.we have lost our individuality.

  • @yaaqovasher
    @yaaqovasher Před 11 lety +13

    i have been loved and accepted by my community bit i have been told things like, 'you cannot choose to follow the Rambam' or 'you cannot practice Torah in a Temani way' you must not eat kitniyot on Pesach, etc. with HaShem's help, i found Rav Bar-Hayim and he has helped me tremendously. thank you Rav for your kindness to gerim!

  • @shlomolawrence6695
    @shlomolawrence6695 Před rokem +2

    On Point

  • @eugenialesiuk1189
    @eugenialesiuk1189 Před 5 lety +11

    Have been staying alone on Shabbat now over 3 years. Put my trust in Hashem .

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety +1

      Hi! Did you found someone to convert you? I may have option for you. Give me an email so i can get in touch with you.

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety +5

      @Dror Levi so you are "jew" but you have not read your talmud and torah? You would not be saying this if you had. Ignorant

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety +3

      @Dror Levi blood? There is no such thing as jewish blood haha your are a joke.

    • @ormand.943
      @ormand.943 Před 5 lety +4

      @Dror Levi saying this you are speaking against the sacred books and our own torah. Go read a little.

    • @eugenialesiuk1189
      @eugenialesiuk1189 Před 5 lety +3

      @Dror Levi than David Hamelech's ancester Ruth a convert and great grandmother - wasn't blood or jewish right ? No wrong read Torah .

  • @pensatorseven1898
    @pensatorseven1898 Před 6 lety +1

    Brilliant video. Subscribing to this channel!!!!!

  • @72Yonatan
    @72Yonatan Před 11 lety +3

    The Teimanim do posken like the Rambam, what are you saying here? Once something is cooked, it is cooked and that is it. Therefore it is permissible to put a cooked soup on a plata for Shabbat, and it is not considered as cooking any longer. Everyone else demands that only solid objects be placed on a plata.

  • @ArielaShines
    @ArielaShines Před 9 lety +3

    Truth.

  • @fundyourhappyplace5693
    @fundyourhappyplace5693 Před 8 lety +4

    I wish more Rabbis were like you, Rabbi. Said the convert from Christianity in America

    • @zeeshankhan-nk1nu
      @zeeshankhan-nk1nu Před 5 lety +1

      Beauty From The Inside Out can u help me out I become a Jewish how? Who gonna help nobody in Pakistan wat can I do?

  • @yaaqovasher
    @yaaqovasher Před 11 lety +1

    to be more correct, that isn't my personal advice, but what i learned from my Rav

  • @retrain35yo87
    @retrain35yo87 Před 2 lety +1

    Hazak Rabbi

  • @aryebognar6663
    @aryebognar6663 Před 3 lety +2

    Does the Rav give an interview on texts relevant to how we should treat the ger?

    • @Yahuah222
      @Yahuah222 Před 3 lety +2

      The alien who resides with you shall be to you as the citizen among you; you shall love the alien as yourself, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God.
      Leviticus 19:34

    • @ShayPatrickCormacTHEHUNTER
      @ShayPatrickCormacTHEHUNTER Před 3 lety

      Ger refers to a non Israeli citizen.. Has nothing to do with converts...

  • @christopherjefferson3561

    I too am isolated but b/c I didn't listen to Hashem and moved to a nowhere town in KY for job..... gotta move

  • @remi1239
    @remi1239 Před 19 dny

    Dear Rabbi, if this might comfort you: not only the study of the Thora is for people who don't like to think. That is also the case with the new testament and with the koran. And yes, indeed and like you said: more critical people go their own way (which doesn't mean they're not religious).

  • @truthhitman7473
    @truthhitman7473 Před 4 lety +1

    Ezekiel 16:3 - 9
    And say, Thus saith the Lord God unto Jerusalem; Thy birth and thy nativity is of the land of Canaan; thy father was an Amorite, and thy mother an Hittite.

  • @rabbiavrahamkatz5250
    @rabbiavrahamkatz5250 Před rokem +1

    All questions, that convert may ask are answered in deed, you don't need to think, you need to act. If you want head breaking pilpul go ahead, just remember that someone did it already for you.

  • @edhollis3
    @edhollis3 Před 6 lety +4

    Why is it recorded that those who convert to Judaism is dearest to him? I've been discriminated in the past and I will make a video soon. I was turned away for nine years and many Synagogue. P ray tefillin, read Hebrew. I enjoy going to mencah prayers.

  • @petretepner8027
    @petretepner8027 Před 5 lety +5

    He's absolutely right, but do we (Sephardim) have to give up the jokes we make about the Ashkenizim? Or vice versa, I suppose(?)

    • @cxarhomell5867
      @cxarhomell5867 Před 2 lety

      Yes, as they might be mocking or insulting the other person.

  • @FaveORitt
    @FaveORitt Před 4 lety +1

    Any lonely people here from the Atlanta area?

  • @rachelvatcher4368
    @rachelvatcher4368 Před 7 lety +4

    Toda Rabbah Rabbi for all your teachings. I'm living in Trinidad here we do not have a synagogue or much Jewish people, I'm seeking to be converted, how can that happen when I live in a country that is in such great exile? can you please help me, my husband and I are coming to Israel in August of this year, can we please meet with you? we need help.

  • @einkerem
    @einkerem Před 11 lety +1

    Not sure what you are doing on this site. Are you a Karaite?
    Where do you get this information from? And you seem to be pretty cocky about your attitude of me quiting while I am ahead.

  • @Law9223
    @Law9223 Před rokem +2

    Go deep with YA and you won't be lonely!

  • @andygrithing7937
    @andygrithing7937 Před 10 lety +13

    im a lonely convert jew

    • @kristinemurphy3445
      @kristinemurphy3445 Před 10 lety +4

      May God give you peace I promise to keep you In my daily zSHEEMA
      Morning prayer for the rest of my earthly journey I hope you
      find peace and a close friend near by you to give you some
      peace &comfort &compassion peace be upon you kmurph5360

    • @patriciadunham8219
      @patriciadunham8219 Před 10 lety +2

      Me too.

    • @annmajor379
      @annmajor379 Před 10 lety +2

      Are you interested in forming a group online?

    • @patriciadunham8219
      @patriciadunham8219 Před 10 lety +1

      Yes.

    • @Wadj1
      @Wadj1 Před 9 lety +2

      TBH I am a Reform convert, hoping to go to Manchester to convert Orthodox and do the job properly, then I will be down to Chabad as soon as I can. The Rebbe has always been my Rebbe, all the way through my conversion and beyond. I know a lot of people badmouth Chabad but as far as I'm concerned no-one does more for the klal as a whole. Shabbat shalom!

  • @superchilltorah1663
    @superchilltorah1663 Před 2 lety +1

    I wish you could convert out. Id be like peace have a good one send me a post card every now and then in the blink of an eye.

  • @motorhead6763
    @motorhead6763 Před 8 lety +4

    True...maybe to much mitsnagdimish attitude..even chassidus seem to do also now.Many ben Noach coming out of JC to yiddishkeit.. Many sincere.Shalom

  • @sirdelrio
    @sirdelrio Před 7 lety +5

    I actually moved to another city to pursue joining a jewish community. These people are all converts, in latinamerica. And the first thing they asked was money. I don't know if it was a test or what. But I didn't insist there. I'm still in love with judaism, but no community near me now that I moved back to my town.

    • @TheGrmany69
      @TheGrmany69 Před rokem

      Ya veo, los sefarditas tienden a ser así por lo que tengo entendido. Tienden a probar...

  • @jimdeane3667
    @jimdeane3667 Před 5 lety +4

    The true Ger Tzedek (convert to Judaism) feels like they don’t fit in, not because of some emotional or intellectual distinctions, but because they are different in spiritual makeup.
    A true Ger Tzedek is the manifestation of the whole, Klal Yisrael. This follows the general principle in the Torah of ‘klal and prat’.
    This was brought before Moshe Rabbeinu and his court concerning the convert in the Torah known as the ‘Ben Yisraelite’. The convert does not belong to any tribe and has no inheritance with the individuals.

    • @adlevhashamayim4694
      @adlevhashamayim4694 Před rokem

      Is this one of the reasons the soul of a ger is of a higher elevation than that if a natural born Jew? Similar to how balei teshuva also have a higher ascension?

  • @David-tu4dn
    @David-tu4dn Před rokem +1

    From everything that I'm seeing in the world right now and understanding that we're going into the 11th shemitah year I don't believe I have time to fully convert to Judaism before the end but I would like to understand if this is a lie to that the branch that was broke off for the Gentiles to be grafted in is this a lie too also the red- lettered words in the New Testament truth or lie?

  • @ThekiBoran
    @ThekiBoran Před 5 lety +1

    Anton Lavey's doppelganger?

  • @vvanderer
    @vvanderer Před 6 lety +2

    Notwithstanding the tale recounted by this rav I have spent time at a chasidic yeshiva where various conversion candidates studying full time were using varying siddurim and nuschaot. one tale does not make a practice. it's a tale, no more.

    • @orenthiadillard8993
      @orenthiadillard8993 Před 5 lety

      Jacques Derrida! My favorite theorist / philosopher of all time! RIP!

  • @sirdelrio
    @sirdelrio Před 7 lety +5

    I'm a christian catholic, Ben Anusim, turning back to judaism. But I don't have a jewish community in my town.

  • @TheMalka770
    @TheMalka770 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I was very disappointed hurt an outrageed to see a sign with my own eyes in a synagogue on Ocean parkway in Brooklyn saying that converts are not welcome . They had made a decree due to intermarriage but I still find it unexcusable it seems anti-tora being as Messiah comes from Ruth. Moshiach now

  • @scottcochran48
    @scottcochran48 Před 5 lety +4

    Rabbi Bar-Hayim seemed very quick to disregard the potential convert that wants to convert due to marriage. However, life and Judaism aren't that black and white. I met someone that was Jewish and since I was very interested in learning about Judaism, we talked for months as I had many questions, We became close and began a relationship. She was very conflicted about that since she was a Torah Jew for many years. Although right after we met, we had a physical relationship for about 18 months, for the past 5 1/2 years, we have been shomer negia and I have been studying for my orthodox conversion under an orthodox Rabbi who knows our situation. I am not converting solely for my partner, however, she did help bring me to Judaism and we do intend to marry. I think jumping to the conclusion that if one of the reasons someone is converting to Judaism is marriage disqualifies someone from converting is very shortsighted and not in the spirit of what Judaism teaches about tolerance and that there is more than one answer to a problem.

    • @my2cents49
      @my2cents49 Před 5 lety +3

      The problem is that many people want their partner to convert only to appease the family and avoid embarrassment in the community, a sort of keepi g the kids "in" thing. That is more common than the partner who seriously believes in the religion itself. There are sincere people who convert before marriage, but the polls and statistics show that the overwhelming majority of people who convert for marriage end up raising their kids in non-religious or mostly unobservant households. You guys are apparently one of the lucky couples who acquired the right heart for it.

  • @StillYHWHs
    @StillYHWHs Před měsícem

    It's because no one is teaching them. As they ask questions.

  • @christopherjefferson3561

    I converted ashkenazi but I follow Sephardic. Turns out my moms maternal line are Sephardic descent.... never knew she was Jewish descent until last year and I converted 16 years ago. Always treated great at masorti and orthodox shuls in B'ham Alabama. Even though I used a sephardic siddur etc. i hate to hear these stories.

    • @sarahjrgensen7753
      @sarahjrgensen7753 Před rokem

      how you know your maternal line is sephardic dna what is your haplogroup

    • @adlevhashamayim4694
      @adlevhashamayim4694 Před rokem

      @@sarahjrgensen7753dna doesn’t really matter for the Beit Din in these matters. For example I know of history of indigenous women of the Americas who lived in Spain and converted to Judaism and left behind Sephardic Jewish traditions to their daughters, grand daughters, etc.

  • @rafaelmadrigal1534
    @rafaelmadrigal1534 Před 6 lety +7

    Upon being curious about my last name I been searching at times for any lead that might answer my question. Recently I found that my last name is linked to the Jews who resided in Spain in the 1500 AD. Spain gave them a choice, drop your Jewish last name and take a Christian one from the name of the town you reside in. The name of the town was and still is, Madrigal de las Altas Torres. Their choice was take a Christian or or leave Spain. My question now is, where do I stand today?

    • @johnhummasti2440
      @johnhummasti2440 Před 3 lety +1

      Anusim must be circumcised and immerse in a mikvah and accept all the 613 Mitzvoth of the Torah to be accepted as Jews. That is the short answer ...!

    • @RudydeGroot
      @RudydeGroot Před 3 lety +1

      @@johnhummasti2440 They can't (accept the 613 mitzwoth). Almost halve of the 613 mitzwoth is based upon the temple service. And as we all know, the temple service is not performed nowadays.. EDIT: They can ACCEPT the mitzwoth, but they can't KEEP them (all)..

    • @johnhummasti2440
      @johnhummasti2440 Před 3 lety

      @@RudydeGroot You misunderstand my reply: Someone whose ancestors were forced to abandon Judaism; to be accepted as a Jew - that person must accept the obligation of the 613 Mitzvoth (there is no "w" sound in Hebrew), be circumcised if they are a male and immerse in a Mikveh. The Temple Service is still an obligation devolving on the whole community along with the rest of the commandments (Mitzvoth)!

    • @RudydeGroot
      @RudydeGroot Před 3 lety

      @@johnhummasti2440 I don't think I misunderstood. There are 613 mitzwoth and most of them rely on temple services which are not kept.. So neither a converted Jew or a geer is able to keep them..

    • @moreoptions9071
      @moreoptions9071 Před rokem +1

      That doesn't mean that you yourself descend from the same Madrigal families. Its a latin origin name

  • @Natashapimp
    @Natashapimp Před 5 lety +1

    ❤️

  • @user-xp3rn3sj3f
    @user-xp3rn3sj3f Před 2 lety

    onesly who say are lonley after conversion not love judaism, and make this just for other purpose, i feel lonley in my country, were i born, and every time when i meet with a jew at sinagog i feel so good, i feel like home. last days was Pesah, my feeling was very good, i feel sad because i don t have yet oportunity to be converted because in my country not make anybody converting....i love judaism and never return me again in chrestianity, because live Rabbi say is a big lie, and i hope to come Mashia quecly to distroy all idolatry from Israel, and all people, righcest people to return of Unic and Grat Hasem!

  • @adamrahman1162
    @adamrahman1162 Před 4 lety

    I am a muslim, and Judaism is the truth if upheld to the adherence to the authentic teachings and of the Jewish tribe. This is Islam. Islam is the culmination of the continued teaching and spirituality of the true Judaism. The prophecy to Abraham is complete with Islam. Because Ishmael is of the promised Nation.

  • @72Yonatan
    @72Yonatan Před 11 lety +2

    My argument about the identity of a person, any person, let alone a Jew, as being spirit, is based entirely upon the Torah - see Genesis and its Hebrew language, if you read Hebrew. Adam was created with a neshumah, the breath of God. That means we are spirit, not the body. The body is a garment only, and that is not something I need Zohar to teach me about. We do differ, in that some of your assumptions are false. Stop projecting your ideas onto others and listen to each argument on its merits.

  • @72Yonatan
    @72Yonatan Před 11 lety +2

    Thanks for repudiating them. We cannot even read Alef-Bet without a mesora, and that is Oral Torah. Karaism is the mere temper tantrum of someone who did not get his way in the appointment of a high office, so he decided to get revenge. That is the entire basis of David ben Anan's heresy.

  • @orchidsrosesg_disone4431

    A Lot of Jews DONT realize YOUR SUPPOSE TO LOVE THE CONVERT LIKE YOU LOVE HASHEM, THERE IS ACTUALLY SERIOUS REPERCUSSIONS IF YOU TREAT A CONVERT BADLY , YOU’LL HAVE TO DEAL WITH HASHEM DIRECTLY BECAUSE HASHEM IS BOTH A FATHER AND MOTHER TO A CONVERT. BETTER BE CAREFUL WHOSE TOES YOU STEP ON, HASHEM PROTECTS AND CHERISHES THE CONVERT…..

  • @josephr.gainey2079
    @josephr.gainey2079 Před rokem +1

    7:08 What happened to this convert?

  • @Jubal.Harshaw
    @Jubal.Harshaw Před měsícem

    I was born and raised Jewish. We studied Torah growing up and keep kosher.
    Yet, I am not accepted in all of the many fractured circles of Judaism even though I am well studied in Torah. I am often ostracized and not included because I refuse to wear the accoutrements of the Polish ghettos. Yet, the Christians that I know treat me with love and acceptance - even though they constantly try to 'convert' me. I teach Torah to Christians and many of them attempt to convert to Judaism. However, it is a daunting to impossible task for them to do so. They are often shunned and not accepted by the closed Jewish communities. They are often rude and insolent to people with a genuine wish to learn about the One True G-d, no matter their origin faith.
    If Judaism continues on this course, it will die.

  • @motorhead6763
    @motorhead6763 Před 7 lety +4

    Zohar kind of prevents converts from being equal to Jews...against Torah and chazal.
    Ask Rabbi Akiva or Meir or Onkelos...

    • @steveg8707
      @steveg8707 Před 5 lety +7

      Only by the ignorant masses. The Talmud is full of praise for these figures. In this regard, Rabbi Akiva was esteemed as one of the greatest (if not the greatest) torah scholar of his generation.

  • @faisalalshaibi415
    @faisalalshaibi415 Před 6 lety

    It is great and beautiful to have general knowledge in all different fields of life and be part of a powerful team or a group in this miserable life, but nothing is more beautiful and enjoyable and worth having than believing in the true GOD ALLAH & his true messenger MOHAMMAD (pboh)

  • @bernardorodriguez4285

    No questions mean no answers!

  • @einkerem
    @einkerem Před 11 lety +2

    There are too many cases in the Tanach that differ with this. Did Ruth wait 9 months or sis she just decide to be a Jew? Tzipora had rabbis or any watching her? Moshe married her and she became a Jew. No where in the Torah does it say anything about 9 months or even 9 days. Either you believe in God and the Torah or you don't.