For People Feeling Behind in Life... This is what you need to know.

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  • čas přidán 28. 05. 2024
  • If you're feeling behind in life and things just aren't where you thought they'd be at this point, or you've struggled with something longer than you thought you would and now feel like you've lost all that time, this message is for you.
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    #personaldevelpment #regret #lettinggo

Komentáře • 370

  • @positive_vibes_2427
    @positive_vibes_2427 Před 3 lety +44

    I just turned 30 and I definitely feel exhausted from overthinking and comparing/feeling like an underachiever

  • @JH-rt2co
    @JH-rt2co Před 2 lety +41

    This is so relatable...feelings of regret, shame, anger at myself, comparison to others, repeat cycle...

  • @dominicdemercurio7933
    @dominicdemercurio7933 Před 3 lety +89

    My Grandmother once told me "Everything in life happened the way it was supposed to happen". I believe in the grieving process of the past, and also to learn from it.

    • @esperanzarobles674
      @esperanzarobles674 Před 3 lety +1

      Thank you for this...it helped me realize things that everything do happen for a reason...

    • @blacklyfe5543
      @blacklyfe5543 Před rokem

      I beg to differ

  • @DinoHunter56
    @DinoHunter56 Před 2 lety +29

    As a 25 year old who dropped out of college at 20 and is looking to go back and redeem myself, I really, really needed to hear this. Thank you.

  • @MsK-pt4kc
    @MsK-pt4kc Před 3 lety +156

    Took me 23years to complete my BA, 2 more years to get my MFA. I was running a business and raising 5 kids but refused to give up. 5 years later I ended it with my husband of 22 years. I did go through this, thinking I wasted so much time but came to the realization that no matter what I still grew and learned from my experience and that I was bound and determined not to spend another 22 years of my life miserable. Regarding my degrees, I knew I had to finish what I started and be a role model to my kids.

    • @BrotherTree1
      @BrotherTree1 Před 3 lety +10

      Now that's a great example of wisdom found in endurance, motivated by the fear of slipping further into a desolate place and avoiding it, and then also simultaneously moving forward with those experiences and lessons learned, to do what you can to salvage the ruins and work towards a better place. Just goes to show that moral character can see you through regardless of status. It's not about what you have or don't have, but how you respond in spite of that. Thanks for sharing Sandra!

    • @MsK-pt4kc
      @MsK-pt4kc Před 3 lety +1

      @@BrotherTree1 thank you!

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety +8

      GOOD for you Sandra. How did it feel to never give up?

    • @MsK-pt4kc
      @MsK-pt4kc Před 3 lety +10

      @@juliakristinamah empowering is the first thought that comes to mind. Also good to keep the promise I made to myself. And then very rewarding to have completed what I started. :)

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety +4

      @@MsK-pt4kc GOOD for you.

  • @steveo.574
    @steveo.574 Před 2 lety +11

    At times it's easy to feel stuck or behind. Then you see all of the people who rushed into a degree, marriage, or situation that didn't work out for them. I'm 28, single and little to no college. But I'm working on persuing my dreams as a voice actor. I've seen friends and family divorced because they rushed a marriage, people unemployed because they chose the wrong career. Ect. It's hard to be patient, but it's better to be patient than miserable. I almost rushed into the military last year because I thought it would bring me closer to the girl I was perusing. Than I thought "Am I doing this for me? Or for her?" And have since stopped talking to her. It takes time to yourself to really look at your own path. Good luck to everyone on their journey!

  • @triplekids3
    @triplekids3 Před 3 lety +120

    I’m in healing at 56 never to late

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety +7

      AMEN!!

    • @scottstarnes8461
      @scottstarnes8461 Před 3 lety +16

      I’m 56 too and working on healing, recovery and moving toward wholeness. I ❤️ your videos Julia and I have so many “Aha” moments in them. I’m going to a counselor in my hometown but you are instrumental in my recovery too!

    • @fatimasamira3695
      @fatimasamira3695 Před 3 lety +3

      Thank you for saying that.

    • @essentialkneads6272
      @essentialkneads6272 Před 3 lety +7

      I am 51 and trying to figure it out.

    • @cappmom5
      @cappmom5 Před 3 lety +4

      Me too, at 57. 🌞

  • @Heiligenbeil
    @Heiligenbeil Před 3 lety +41

    After my divorce and followed relationships with a sociopath, I was devastated and discouraged. I was only 27, but I thought I was old and worthless and would never be loved again. Six months later I met the love of my life, we’ve been together for 10 years, 8 years in marriage. So when I start having these thoughts about my life not being like the one I envisaged, I console myself that maybe it’s gonna be even better than any plans.

  • @SybilNix
    @SybilNix Před 3 lety +60

    I’m 25, and I was “supposed” to have finished undergrad by age 22.
    I had to withdraw from classes multiple times, failed one or two courses (due to mental health issues), and took a brief leave of absence. And on top of all that, I became a part-time student, only prolonging the amount of time spent in undergrad.
    It sucks to still be in undergrad while watching my 2018 classmates finish masters programs already.
    But at the same time, I’ve done an immense amount of healing, self-discovery, starting new treatments, and I also started building my own business.
    Even then, I can still feel bad about it sometimes. But I’m so glad that I haven’t let it bring me to the point of quitting.

    • @TheFilmbroad
      @TheFilmbroad Před 3 lety +3

      Cheer up! I was 31 when I graduated undergrad, and 37 with a grad degree. My grandma was 56 when she got her B.A. You can still do it.

    • @bradleyg905
      @bradleyg905 Před 2 lety +2

      Perhaps all the struggles you've been experiencing are the Universe's way of telling you you're on the wrong path. Education in no way guarantees success... although we've all been brainwashed into believing that is so. Lot's of hugely successful people never even went to college. You need to figure out what makes you feel Alive. What Energizes your soul? If you can figure that out, then you'll have found the right path for yourself. Don't pay attention to what the masses are doing. Just do you.
      Wishing you success and happiness!

    • @TheFilmbroad
      @TheFilmbroad Před 2 lety

      What Bradley G says is correct. I'd like to add on to their comment. 1) Make sure that the degree that you choose leads to something other than over-educated barista or fry jockey. I've worked both of those jobs and didn't need a degree for them.
      2) If you just want an education to be more enlightened or prove something. Get a vocational degree and take the adult continuing education classes. You'll be way ahead most people. Good luck!

    • @fatawkwardchungus8949
      @fatawkwardchungus8949 Před 2 lety

      feel motivated by this comment

    • @AngelBien
      @AngelBien Před 2 lety

      Thank you so much for this comment, I'm going through almost the same exact thing

  • @wg8290
    @wg8290 Před 2 lety +16

    I'm a 48 year old male. I have a law degree and practiced for 10 years. I'm a bookkeeper at a transportation company now. I am actually happy but feel like a complete failure in my professional life. I am a hard worker and probably of average intelligence. Also, I probably have some weird social disorder since I have never had close friends.

  • @mellissagalgey8879
    @mellissagalgey8879 Před 3 lety +23

    Spot on, hit the big 40 in September and don't have my own home, no partner or kids, certainly never thought I'd be 40 and not to have all that

    • @saramiles3621
      @saramiles3621 Před 3 lety +1

      I'm just a lil bit younger than you, but SAME! I got married young and ended up leaving the marriage when I was 27, and last month, the man I planned to marry and finally start a family with dumped me and now I'm left with nothing. Also, I had a miscarriage last year and since being diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis in August, I feel like having kids is definitely out of the question!

    • @mellissagalgey8879
      @mellissagalgey8879 Před 3 lety +1

      @@saramiles3621 I'm so extremely sorry that this happened to you, you didnt deserve any of that

    • @saramiles3621
      @saramiles3621 Před 3 lety

      @@mellissagalgey8879 Thank you

    • @mellissagalgey8879
      @mellissagalgey8879 Před 3 lety +3

      @@saramiles3621 you keep your head held high, and you find whatever it takes that helps you to feel better and cheer you up and hold onto that feel good feeling, I don't know why all this happened to you but one things for sure, there is something and someone so much more amazing out there for you, and nothing is gonna stop that from coming into your life xx

    • @CondredgeDole
      @CondredgeDole Před 3 lety +4

      40 hit me soooo hard too.

  • @milaalt1141
    @milaalt1141 Před 3 lety +102

    Dont worry girl I'm 31 and trying to finish my bachelors

    • @aurinkobay7118
      @aurinkobay7118 Před 3 lety +3

      i finished at 40 .. my paper weight is totally useless. so it makes little to no difference in my career

    • @wg8290
      @wg8290 Před 2 lety

      I just want to drink on the weekends, work and watch Mad Men.

    • @Ericaxv
      @Ericaxv Před 2 lety +3

      I’m 22 and I feel like this already 🥲. I wish I did more things when I was younger.

    • @Well-Put
      @Well-Put Před 2 lety +5

      @@EricaxvWhen you were younger? You're in your 20's! Now is the time to have that fun, take risks, travel. Take care!

    • @fatawkwardchungus8949
      @fatawkwardchungus8949 Před 2 lety

      @@Well-PutI am also 22 I feel like I no time to get forward in life

  • @dddamaged7501
    @dddamaged7501 Před 3 lety +43

    The past is gone, dwelling on it is not helpful. We only have the present moment to create a better future. Mindfulness is a wonderful tool for work and relaxation.

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety +4

      I agree

    • @user-zu3md5qz8y
      @user-zu3md5qz8y Před 4 měsíci

      if only God knew

    • @dddamaged7501
      @dddamaged7501 Před 4 měsíci

      God knows your heart! God created it all, from galaxies to multiple factual versions to the atom! ​@@user-zu3md5qz8y

  • @barrymcgahan692
    @barrymcgahan692 Před 3 lety +6

    Recently turned 40 and realised I haven't accomplished anything. Never learned to drive, never had a proper relationship, no kids, no job, no idea who I am or what I want to be. I don't know what my goals are, what I want in life. I'm quite introverted and the idea of going out and doing things and interacting with other people is so scary that I basically sat in my room and let my thirties pass me by. I want to do something about it, figure out what and who I wanna be but I don't know how, and am so afraid of what it will take to do it.

  • @stevenlazar4550
    @stevenlazar4550 Před 3 lety +38

    I left a cult that i was part of for 24 years.i am now 46.all my friends and family still in the cult are now shunning me.trying to rebuild my life but feel sad time i wasted.this really help me.thank you.

    • @pebblesmiller9026
      @pebblesmiller9026 Před 3 lety +2

      Sending you courage and strength am familiar with leaving a cult and leaving them - Plymouth brethren.

    • @stevenlazar4550
      @stevenlazar4550 Před 3 lety +1

      @@pebblesmiller9026 thank you for your kind words.

    • @Jeb9221
      @Jeb9221 Před 3 lety +1

      You are so brave ❤️🏆🎖️

    • @stevenlazar4550
      @stevenlazar4550 Před 3 lety

      @@Jeb9221 thank you for your kind words.

    • @Well-Put
      @Well-Put Před 2 lety

      Good for you brother ❤

  • @velvetambuski1973
    @velvetambuski1973 Před 3 lety +48

    Oh my goodness...this is so where I am at right now.

  • @jonathanwilliams86
    @jonathanwilliams86 Před 2 lety +9

    I'm 24. I've never been in a relationship and I've been living with my parents for the past year after the pandemic shut down my school during my senior semester. I don't know that I actually need a relationship or my own apartment. I really just need to stop being angry and upset that life didn't hand me everything that I wanted.

    • @Sarah-pj4vo
      @Sarah-pj4vo Před rokem

      I understand how you feel. It's okay, sometimes to be angry and it's a normal feeling when life keeps letting us down. However you are still very young, 24...( I think I've got age envy...... ). I don't know where you live in the world, but you can search for something called working holidays....as you're still under 30, you could be eligible. That will allow you to travel, live and work in another country for either 1 or 2 years - that also depends on your passport and the visa you apply for. Good luck.

  • @brandonthedford1285
    @brandonthedford1285 Před 3 lety +15

    For years i felt behind on life, feeling that im not good enough because im not where i want to be in life and feel like im running out of time, and no matter how hard i tried i felt as if im getting knocked 5 steps back after the 1st step take i take each time. Im trying to break my mind from this cycle of shame, unfulfillment, and guilt. These videos help me but i know it will take time to internalize it

  • @peachwedding
    @peachwedding Před 3 lety +18

    I also started grad school at 28!! I went to school with a few ladies that were 50+ with kids, so I didn't really feel like the odd one out, but I definitely felt out of place in terms of not being married yet or finding that life partner, but I've learned to let go of these expectations of myself.

  • @NM-xg3ms
    @NM-xg3ms Před 3 lety +21

    I don’t know how this suddenly came up on my feed. But i was literally falling down the self blame/regret rabbithole (for the 1000th time) as I saw this. This is for me one of the hardest things i’ve had to deal with. Everytime I think i’m over it, then suddenly something triggers it again. It’s truly hard. The feeling that you ruined your own life, didn’t reach your potential. But yes in all of that we forget to see that there is still so much of life ahead. And we should be 100% present for that. Thank you for this video, great tips and insights, and overall good wake up call.

  • @stoogey1
    @stoogey1 Před 3 lety +12

    I'm 41 now and I thought I would be over what happened from the age of 9-13. I buried my mom, dad, grandad, brother and uncle during that time. I've been beating myself of physically and mentally since then. I've relived all their deaths EVERY NIGHT in my dreams since mom died (she was the first.) I've watched her die over 11,000 times.

  • @elin_
    @elin_ Před 3 lety +56

    I've had this exact feeling every single day for many years now. I'm 27 and I can't work because of mental illness. I feel worthless.

    • @emangura
      @emangura Před 3 lety +3

      Jesus loves you!
      Matt 7:7-8
      Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.
      Don’t lose hope. Ask Him genuinely With a repenting heart He will provide as make a way for you.❤️

    • @sanjivjhangiani3243
      @sanjivjhangiani3243 Před 3 lety +4

      Redefine your situation. Think of whatever therapy and/or medicinal regimen you are on as your "work". Your job is to get better so you can have a regular job in 6 months (obviously the time lag might be less or greater, but you get the idea).

    • @utkarshgaikwad9253
      @utkarshgaikwad9253 Před 2 lety

      Good Bless You

    • @LCox-dt6fy
      @LCox-dt6fy Před 2 lety +2

      You are not worthless. You never were worthless, and you never will be. You are an individual creative human being with your own DNA, your own fingerprints and your own unique identity, personality and personhood and gifts. You have your own strengths and your own capabilities that are different from anyone else’s. Sure you have some weaknesses, but that is because you’re human. Just like the rest of us. You’re human. So you do your best, but sometimes you stumble and fall down. Everyone has mental health. Sometimes it is good and great and sometimes it is bad and awful. Whatever you need to do, get yourself with a trusted mental health therapist, a good one, and get yourself, if needed to a primary care MD who is knowledgeable experienced to assess the need for any medication‘s. Last but not least, don’t give up. Don’t you ever give up. We are all in this boat together. We’re here, You just can’t say yes, but we are here. And we are all trying to stay in the boat and keep smiles on our faces and see the beauty wherever we can find it. If you believe in a creator or a higher power or God or whatever, then talk to him, however, whatever and ask for wisdom in guidance and mercy. But don’t ever give up. Take care of yourself. And talk to yourself like you would someone else that you love and that you care about very much. You are that person.

    • @ashusharma8182
      @ashusharma8182 Před 2 lety +3

      I am also mentally ill and unemployed 😑

  • @fatbottombiker3038
    @fatbottombiker3038 Před 3 lety +5

    You are speaking to me big time today! I am 50 years old and I am still working on my BA. I have made so many mistakes and I never thought I would be in this place in my life at this age. Regret regret regret.

  • @normanmacfarlane6724
    @normanmacfarlane6724 Před rokem +1

    No matter what you do or say life will happen to you whether you want it to or not.
    I am 64 had a stroke that stopped me at 63 , coming back from being in a wheelchair chair , unable to talk , I got back to work and discovered it wasn't for me.
    I had all the problems in life that we all do. Payment of bills , mortgage, doctors appointments learning to cope and so on.
    The only thing I can say is just do what you can and circumstances and situations will arrive when you least experience them.
    The idea of" fulfilment" interests me because whatever you do all will be swept away by life .
    Be happy each moment you can.
    As Winston Churchill used to say , and I paraphrase " when you go through the valley of death learn to run . . . "

  • @roccorubino6288
    @roccorubino6288 Před 3 lety +37

    I'm 60 years old. I went on disability 4 years ago after a nervous breakdown and 5 hospitalizations.
    I was going to work 4 more years, retire and take my pension, and go into the counseling field full time. Suffice to say, I was unable to work my plan, and achieve my goals. I essentially lost two careers and now I spend my days keeping house, reading and spending time with my dog while my wife works.
    It has been very hard to make sense of this "new normal."

    • @JdaPhoeniX9
      @JdaPhoeniX9 Před 3 lety +7

      Brother Rocco Rubino-
      Thank you for sharing🙏🏾💫
      I can identify with what your saying; Illnesses/Ailments/Breakdown etc, can really put a spanner in the works & knock one for six!!...
      You are strong and awesome (remember that!)- for being able to get through all of that and still be here & share your story is an achievement in itself (respect to you and your wife!)
      As the saying goes ‘everything happens for a reason’ even if the reasoning doesn’t match our plans!
      Even in these uncertain times, you can still create a quality reality and find your purpose!
      Believe in yourself and your creativity & mental power!...
      You will be successful! 🙏🏾✨

    • @roccorubino6288
      @roccorubino6288 Před 3 lety +1

      @@JdaPhoeniX9 You made my day, even if perplexity is the tenor of my life right now. If I was strong, I would not have had a breakdown. I would have had the resources to meet the challenges.

    • @happylindsay4475
      @happylindsay4475 Před 3 lety +4

      @@roccorubino6288 Strong people have break downs. Strong people take care of their mental health- and you did that. Give yourself credit. I am happy you are here with us and sharing your story. Again- that is strength Sir! Truth to power. Sending you love and support.
      I speak from experience- not judgement. Take care of yourself 😊🙏🏽

    • @roccorubino6288
      @roccorubino6288 Před 3 lety +1

      @@happylindsay4475 Miss Lindsay, much thanks for your response and the incredibly kind words. I truly appreciate your support and I kindness.

    • @MrGconstantine1972
      @MrGconstantine1972 Před 3 lety +2

      @@JdaPhoeniX9 thank you for these kind words! Even though they are not directed to Me, I FEEL INSPIRED BY THEM!! Your words has given me some hope!!👍👍👍

  • @chickentender49
    @chickentender49 Před 2 lety +5

    I was often told my parents that I’m behind in life cuz others have done their driving and I haven’t, others have gone to uni earlier than me and all sorts. I realised that God’s timing is more important than social media timing. You look in the mirror and you see yourself, not others. Stay blessed everyone 💜❤️💙💛

    • @fatawkwardchungus8949
      @fatawkwardchungus8949 Před 2 lety

      I feeel very awkward behind the wheel I feel like I will bump into someone walking on road

  • @ericseal4453
    @ericseal4453 Před 3 lety +9

    I feel like I put the "pause" botton on, when I was 25. I feel that I took a very wrong turn in my life and remained functional, on a practical level, but became really mixed up on many other levels.

  • @admirbarucija2018
    @admirbarucija2018 Před 3 lety +25

    I’m feeling somewhat behind in life for several reasons, this is something I truly needed!!! Thank you so much 🙏🏻💕

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety +2

      Glad it connected - I always appreciate your comments Admir.

    • @admirbarucija2018
      @admirbarucija2018 Před 3 lety +1

      @@juliakristinamah I am really happy to hear that, thank you! :) I’m always grateful for having your videos and being able to learn from them

  • @suprememaz
    @suprememaz Před 3 lety +21

    Thank you for this. I’ve been feeling this so much lately!
    It’s a genuine struggle to remind yourself that it’s okay if your journey is different from everyone else’s. That just proves that you’re a unique person different from others.

  • @RobertAPattison
    @RobertAPattison Před rokem +1

    I'm an obese 31 year-old man who still lives at home with my mother in the UK. I'm out of work and nobody wants to employ me, in fact I've only ever had one paid job in my entire life. This causes a lot of friction between me and mam and we argue almost every day, mam is brutally honest which doesn't help. I was diagnosed with depression 10 years ago but I'm always looking for work. I always wanted to be married, have kids and have my own place by the time I was 30, but none of those things have happened. I feel like things such getting my own place and owning a car are so unrealistic right now. I just sleep and surf the internet a lot as I feel I have nothing to live for. There is just no point in trying.

  • @niels1t1if
    @niels1t1if Před 3 lety +7

    I am 22 and never had teenage experiences. I want to experience them now and I feel moreso 17-18 than 22. So I guess I am just going to act 17-18 for a while, not gonna lie about my age ofcourse..
    I do feel like I wasted a lot of time in the past, and it can become a verry deep pit if you stay in it too long. Best way i can explain this feeling is that it feels like you have been in a coma for sevaral years, and you woke up older with no experiences to show for it.
    Her saying the she used to tell herself 'I'm behind 4 years' really hits home for me. I am not really worried about my carreer being behind some of my peers, I have a degree already but I started a diffrent one that fits my goals, ideals, and prefered work inviroment a lot better. I mostly regret not having had experiences with friends yet. And yes that might be due to a background of bullying and all sorts of other stuff, but It's hard not to tell myself that its my fault or, even more so, that it's too late...

  • @kurisuchiinu1206
    @kurisuchiinu1206 Před 3 lety +6

    Thank you for this. I have been comparing my life and myself to almost everyone around me. From the people I see outside (the way they spend money, the way they wear stuff, the job they had, the money they had, the normal experience they had, almost everything!) Sometimes, I had to stop and tell myself to stop comparing because that'd would make me unhappy.

  • @jasondunklesteelguitar
    @jasondunklesteelguitar Před 3 lety +2

    I’m 40 years old, stuck in a toxic relationship and don’t know how to get myself out of it. I’ve always struggled financially and don’t have any college degree or career. I’ve always been dependent on someone else to support me. I think it stems from my family who all live in poverty and don’t have any college education. They all live in mobile homes or shack houses. They are negative and made me have low self esteem and belief in myself. I struggle with depression and self sabotaging behavior. I always talk negative about myself like I’m not worth anything. I just wish I could turn things around but don’t know how or what to do. I enjoy watching your videos.

  • @jessieprescott1535
    @jessieprescott1535 Před 3 lety

    It’s kinda crazy how literally every video you make, I hear at just the right time. I needed this. Thank you. 💕

  • @healingispossible1377
    @healingispossible1377 Před 3 lety +4

    You're amazing! I can't tell you how much you've impacted my life! I am so thankful for you. You always seem to put out what I need, when I need it..and wow I needed this. 🤗💕

  • @singwings
    @singwings Před 2 lety +2

    Woah I needed this today!! I’ve been struggling with “doing it all”, being great at everything, and having it together on time and as planned.

  • @stevecatanio8532
    @stevecatanio8532 Před rokem

    I've listened to you for years. Your content is very helpful and encouraging

  • @josefkelly6488
    @josefkelly6488 Před 3 lety

    I'm thankful to reconnect to the wisdom you're shining through and thank you for continuing to do so.

  • @BrotherTree1
    @BrotherTree1 Před 3 lety +17

    I think it's a mixture of both goal setting and timeline setting. We need deadlines as a place to measure our progress and failures and to see where and how we can improve, rather than use it to demolish and hate yourself - it's not supposed to be used to whip yourself, and you're conceptualising and using it incorrectly if that's what you're getting and feeling from setting timelines... because they're not static... it's just there as a hypothesis for potential to get you progressing and moving. With goals, don't set them too ambitiously where it's too outside of your current capabilities... why? Because it's so large that you can't even comprehend it and so you'll give up on it understandably. So take them down a notch, and set them high but situate it just a bit outside of your current competence level, but then set small micro-goals from that goal and focus on them... why focus on the small steps of that goal? Because one, the goal can change as you engage in those small steps. And two, it's within your realm of optimal motivation, balanced between comfort and challenge, to go out and do them. And if you've fallen behind... there's only one way to solve this without being naive and cynical about it. Do what you can to fall less behind... salvage what you can and work from there, one step at a time. That's the best option you've got, to increase the likelihood of saving yourself from damnation (or further damnation), and from there, with more progress iterated over time, perhaps you can work towards and reach a place that's better and successful to your evolving ideals... maybe even better and not what you thought it was to begin with.

    • @JdaPhoeniX9
      @JdaPhoeniX9 Před 3 lety

      BrotherTree1- thank you! You are wise🙏🏾 All the best✨

  • @dk-bv6vf
    @dk-bv6vf Před 3 lety +2

    so powerful and so very much needed in my life. your heart shines through your words, your tone, your eyes, body language. I swear I can even hear a slight stammer in your voice at times of deep empathy for your audience... it catches my heart in my throat and resonates profoundly.
    thank you for your being a healing voice, sharing your heart and your wisdom 💗

  • @shairahusin8444
    @shairahusin8444 Před rokem +1

    Stumbled upon this lovely channel. Thanks for existing! 💖💖

  • @morandi78
    @morandi78 Před 3 lety

    Amazing advice, thank YOU!

  • @earthgrazer5511
    @earthgrazer5511 Před 3 lety +3

    Thank you for this, Julia. I've been feeling so behind from my peers lately. I'm 21 and still a sophomore in college. I failed a sem's worth of classes and it can feel terrible while i watched my peers move from one course to the next pretty easily. My university has this really competitive environment and I'm really struggling. I'm also trying to get diagnosed with ADHD. I'm so thankful for your videos because they really had brought me to some important realizations. Now, I feel like I'm on the right track. I'm currently working on understanding myself, creating a bond with myself, forgiving myself. I stared at a photograph on the wall of me at 7 year old and i just burst out crying, i can't even look me in the eye because i feel like I've failed that little girl. But then I tooked a deep breath, tuned in to my emotions and realized that it's not too late for me as i am young. Then suddenly i felt powerful at that moment, suddenly i want to do better, for us.
    I'm making myself emotionally stronger. But that could really be hard as I am an HSP. But the weird thing and i guess this is a good thing, is that now, I believe I can actually do it.

    • @fatawkwardchungus8949
      @fatawkwardchungus8949 Před 2 lety +1

      HSP struggle with emotions of shame guilt and inferiority the thing is also stare at my childhood photo and instantly I feeel oh god I was so sensible how did my life turn out to be this but life moves on even if someone is mentally ill people don't care so people like you and me need to stop caring about people and focus on ourselves

  • @chrisdigitalartist
    @chrisdigitalartist Před 3 lety +2

    Yes!! I am one of the members in the Shift Society that has struggled with this. It's like this video was meant for me. If I can encourage anyone watching this and are struggling with these thoughts about life and not achieving goals at a certain age, just remember those lack of accomplishments doesn't mean you are not worthy. You are worthy regardless. I had struggled with that thought. That was my one of my first biggest and most important shift. I am shifting my mind to believe I am worthy and deserving of my goals. That takes the pressure off. Now, I am gonna move on towards goals. Thank you Julia for this video and for the pdf file! I am glad that I am trusting you to help me with this work. See you tonight for the Q&A #SeniorShifter

  • @rickhammar1636
    @rickhammar1636 Před 3 lety +1

    As always your advice is great. One thing I find difficult to deal with is the number of people who seem to think they know what kind of life you need to live. I'm 51 divorced for nearly 3 years now & have 2 kids 10 & 16 & self employed. All the usual problems that go along with rotten divorces, financial, emotional, an ex, etc. I am happy doing my own thing & being the best dad I can be to my kids. People seem to think I need their advice about everything. Vacations, relationships, money, & the list goes on. It seems everyone is so plugged into social media these days that it is becoming abnormal to not want to be involved in everyone's life. I think if you need help you should seek it. If you want to be happy unplug.

  • @morethanamess1980
    @morethanamess1980 Před 3 lety +6

    Been feeling behind everyone else (even those younger than me) long before my teen years. I was never (consistently) accomplished on the outside. Hate to admit that I was only considered "cool" when someone else needed to vent and feel less like a loser than myself in comparison. Tbh, I still wonder what it might have been like if I was actually talented or charismatic. I struggle to be competent and normal as I type this. There are days where I feel like I have faith when it comes to my potential, but those days come and go. I hope I can keep the faith more often going forward.

  • @MmmDe
    @MmmDe Před 2 lety +1

    I feel so sad and I really need this. Thank you so much.

  • @reeceyhoodflipgenius7886
    @reeceyhoodflipgenius7886 Před 2 lety +1

    This really got me thanking how I use to be thanking.
    Every day is new the past is the past. Thank you so much.
    So I was not into reading books when I was 19. I’m 20 now and I’ve read 3 books this year and also started to write my own music.
    I should be happy but I keep going back to comparing my self to every one and not staying Focus.
    I’m starting now! 😃

  • @reneesbrownspeaker8280

    Thank you Julia!

  • @pamelakasper8464
    @pamelakasper8464 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you so much. ❤️ I was just saying this to myself the other day. !!! Crazy !!!

  • @healingispossible1377
    @healingispossible1377 Před 3 lety +1

    Love the Intentional Self Journal! Filling it in now. Can't wait to get started!

  • @Alan-xt4yj
    @Alan-xt4yj Před 3 lety

    Thank you so much Julia.

  • @VenomGeek994
    @VenomGeek994 Před 3 lety

    I’m currently 27 years of age, still living with my parents. My girlfriend that I have been with for 6 years as well still lives with her folks. Her and I want that future of marriage, children, great careers, just as that simple life. I personally feel so stuck in the mud with only a high school diploma and no college experience, and a job that pays $12 an hour. I see so many of my friends going on with that life and dream that I want to achieve right in front of my eyes and it sometimes brings me down so low cause I wish I was on that same pace to my success as well. This is currently a thought is just constantly pacing through my mind that I can not seem to shake off until I watched this video. From a scale of 1-10 with 1 being my downfall I’m currently at an 8, thank you for the wake up call on this one. Still have more healing to go through but this definitely is an uplift for me so far. 🤟🏼

  • @AbdullahArRafi
    @AbdullahArRafi Před 3 lety +2

    Couldn't have timed this better! We can't change the past but we can always change the thoughts about our past!

  • @LetsLiveThriving
    @LetsLiveThriving Před 2 lety +1

    This was a wonderful video. I think one of the things we often don’t do enough of is giving ourselves more credit for what we have accomplished and what we have learned from our past positively and negatively. We all have different areas of opportunity and setbacks. And as famously stated, “a setback is a setup for a comeback.” And that comeback is not age-dependent.

  • @thegodofsilence5580
    @thegodofsilence5580 Před 3 lety +2

    You’re amazing thank you for everything you do

  • @jennifers.7037
    @jennifers.7037 Před 3 lety +2

    Julia, you are simply the best! You are soo soo good at what you do 😊

  • @randyridner7476
    @randyridner7476 Před 3 lety

    Thanks Kristina. Love your videos.

  • @ShellyBomb
    @ShellyBomb Před 3 lety

    Thank you ... very powerful; just what I needed to hear - on this 1st day of November.

  • @MINGYU_KIM
    @MINGYU_KIM Před 3 lety +2

    Thanks always for helpful videos

  • @varun.shenoy10
    @varun.shenoy10 Před 3 lety

    Dear Julia, I cannot explain how much your example in 3:00 was encouraging and relieving to hear. I am currently 22 and starting my bachelor's in Accounting. I was trying to figure out what my career would be for the past 5 years. I always struggled with this issue for a long time. And your example made me cry. I now know that someone has been where I am now and there is hope. I hope if there is anyone else in a similar situation, please take heart there is hope and stay strong 👍💪

  • @Thomas_Leo
    @Thomas_Leo Před 3 lety +6

    Thanks for the video. I've been thinking like this for the past several years.

  • @CondredgeDole
    @CondredgeDole Před 3 lety +1

    Yup, I did this every single day of the year last year before I turned 40. Just turned 41 a couple weeks ago, this year was much better, but it still dogs me.
    Love how you said that it is "indulging" those thoughts. Interesting way of thinking about it. But yes, these thought spirals totally steal my energy and drive to make the changes I need to make to stop going down the same path that got me here. Imma check out your journal. Thanks Julia!

    • @CondredgeDole
      @CondredgeDole Před 3 lety

      Follow-up. Went for a walk with a couple good friends last night, they are both doing great in their careers and I'm super happy for them both, but boy that triggered my "feeling behind in life" thought loop again - BUT, employed what I learned in this video and was able to stop the cycle before it dragged me down to the depths of darkness - yay! Thanks Julia.

  • @MFMc2
    @MFMc2 Před 3 lety

    Thanks Julia for inspired words..much needed in this time space we find ourselves in right now with so much going on one can very quickly lose sight of what is important and what is an energy drain. We struggle with being with ourselves and find it hard to deal with things that we may have buried in the past and we now have time to process it .Allowing for where we now are seems a good starting point as I believe we have been given this opportunity to see where we are and begin to live a more fulfilling life..

  • @magnetdesignandadver
    @magnetdesignandadver Před rokem

    Thank you so much for this - it's the kind of practical advice that I need

  • @larissashen4874
    @larissashen4874 Před 3 lety +3

    Needed this. Feel really behind because I haven't finished college in the usual four years.

  • @lesliedefilippis2150
    @lesliedefilippis2150 Před 3 lety

    Thank you so very much for the help you give to so many people. What a good soul you have

  • @droneguy69
    @droneguy69 Před 2 lety +2

    I'm turning 44 got my two year degree, currently working on BSCS, saw the world in my 20's in the Navy, worked as an aircraft technician, yet I'm not accomplished per my father's standards.

  • @paul2direct
    @paul2direct Před 3 lety +2

    You always provide us some very useful inputs as how to access our lives better

  • @millies.8810
    @millies.8810 Před 2 lety

    Great video. Not comparing yourself to others is key. My inherited disease, and the choices I have made based on my religious believes has made my journey different. The one thing that has helped me in this regret thing is knowing I can set goals and change my path to wherever I want. I just have to set the intention and start doing something.

  • @rebeccasmith384
    @rebeccasmith384 Před 3 lety

    Great Topic! I have often thought about this through out the years. I also downloaded the Intentional Self Journal. Thank you Dear Julia!

  • @fireluvr
    @fireluvr Před 3 lety +3

    I’m 29 still haven’t graduated college yet and still have a lot to go and feel like I’ll never get anywhere in life

    • @AngelBien
      @AngelBien Před 2 lety

      Give the middle finger to your doubts.
      You can still make it.
      I mean it.

  • @dianelamorticella6053
    @dianelamorticella6053 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you for this!!!!

  • @dougarnold7955
    @dougarnold7955 Před 3 lety +1

    Thanks. Good stuff.

  • @michelleterry1428
    @michelleterry1428 Před 3 lety +4

    I just downloaded the journal! Thank you, ur videos really help me!😊

    • @juliakristinamah
      @juliakristinamah  Před 3 lety

      Great Michelle - I think you're going to love it. Glad you're here.

  • @merzarlife437
    @merzarlife437 Před 3 lety

    Great work Julia!! Keep it up!

  • @jackiem3740
    @jackiem3740 Před 3 lety

    Thank You!

  • @Batmanking3
    @Batmanking3 Před 3 lety

    Very powerful topic thankyou so much for this video

  • @gen8878
    @gen8878 Před 3 lety

    My beloved Julia, hello. Actually you surprised me by your opens and truthful .. For answering your question I'm behind in life for 25 years old.. Your videos are as valuable as such a close to the heart ,keep it up Doc wish you all the best ♥..

  • @faithsandstrom3883
    @faithsandstrom3883 Před 2 lety +1

    Perfect timing for your message. 59
    Many regrets to where I should be.
    I still know I have some blessings but I'm going through regrets right now.

  • @cazartist1305
    @cazartist1305 Před 2 lety

    Sharing this one as well! Love your wisdom

  • @shanbraz6011
    @shanbraz6011 Před 9 měsíci

    I am 30 years old pursuing dance and I oftentimes find myself comparing in auditions. I oftentimes regret that I wasn’t given the opportunity to take dance lessons as a young kid and started formal training as an adult. I just feel super behind in such a cut throat industry. On top of that struggling to find a job to help while I train and also not being where I’d want to be relationally. It’s super difficult but I’m trying to see everything as purposeful. That there’s a purple to everything and if it seems like there isn’t, I’ll try to make it meaningful

  • @stephc5983
    @stephc5983 Před 3 lety

    Thank you!

  • @masterpieceinmaking1941
    @masterpieceinmaking1941 Před 3 lety +1

    Just in time I needed this the moment at this time...thank you so much...you are so wonderful and a God's gift in my life...❤️you will achieve great success with all the blessings you are having cz of the help you are providing 🙏🙏🙏

  • @imirim
    @imirim Před 3 lety

    This is an excellent video. Going through this right now.

  • @hopeslagstad606
    @hopeslagstad606 Před 4 měsíci

    I’m 37, almost 38, and I’m disabled. I became permanently disabled when I was 26. I feel like such a loser and so stuck in life. This isn’t the life I wanted (I don’t think anyone who is disabled has chosen that life). In college I heard from so many people that I had so much potential and was going to have an incredible career. The longest I was able to work at once was 6 months. I feel like a failure, but I’m trying really hard to change my view of myself. I’m sick of being sick. I’m sick of the blame and the shame. I know I’m here for a reason. Now I just need to find that reason. I never leave comments. I hope that wasn’t cringy. 😮
    Also, people with disabilities can do amazing things. Some are able to live normal, successful, happy lives. We come with all different abilities. Please don’t mistake my previous words as a commentary on disabled people. I’m only referring to my own experience.

  • @jamesloud9930
    @jamesloud9930 Před 3 lety

    Thank you 💕

  • @konateyssouf3699
    @konateyssouf3699 Před 3 lety

    Hello ! This is exactly the problematic and the issues I am facing right now... thank you!

  • @NenaLavonne
    @NenaLavonne Před 3 lety +8

    Super relatable! Great video 🙏

  • @seairagoosby8287
    @seairagoosby8287 Před rokem

    Thanks so much

  • @ilovemadonna2010
    @ilovemadonna2010 Před 3 lety +5

    Thank you so much ❤️

  • @elmera.latorre9875
    @elmera.latorre9875 Před 3 lety +1

    The final words cured me. 💕💕💕

  • @jabney283
    @jabney283 Před 3 lety +1

    I needed to hear all of this.

  • @salzmedia511
    @salzmedia511 Před 3 lety +1

    My family and I were immigrants from Mexico. I grew up in Chicago most of my life. I always felt so behind compared to all my classmates. Everyone here already had established families with money, cars, and college money. I got married at 18 out of love and the need to build together with a financial partner. I am 25 now and recently divorced. I felt so behind seeing everyone graduating on social media, taking extravagant trips, and going to expensive restaurants. I’m here barely paying my own house. But at least I have my own house and everyone in my family is healthy. Can’t compare yourself to others. I deleted all of my social media for that reason.

  • @kokomormon
    @kokomormon Před 3 lety +1

    Hello julia good to watch your video for inspiration. Thank you.

  • @cailiebetz3920
    @cailiebetz3920 Před 2 lety

    This is so helpful

  • @TheThora17
    @TheThora17 Před 3 lety

    Thank you 🙏

  • @leylak1507
    @leylak1507 Před 3 lety

    Thank you❤

  • @saramiles3621
    @saramiles3621 Před 3 lety +5

    Story of my life, especially NOW!!!

    • @BM19917
      @BM19917 Před 3 lety +1

      I thought i was alone 🥂

  • @kristinaslovikova8729
    @kristinaslovikova8729 Před 3 lety

    I feel you ! I did my BA in English and American literature and all the time, I knew I wanted to study psychology. But I calmed myself down. Due to bullying and other issues, I knew I had to get my 1st in English. I did. I knew, knowing the language very well, would help me massively with psychology. I'm now "starting all over again" as some people would say with psychology. I know in 3 years time, I would've been starting my PhD in English if I wanted to. But no, psychology is my field and my passion. No matter how long it takes, I'm gonna make it. The point is - you have to find your purpose, it's timeless. It will take long time to become what you want to be, that's what I've been telling myself. I've got time. I can still learn everything and use my maturity to become even better psychologist, because I'm starting "later". Everything is about perspective. Believe in yourself and KNOW the REASON why you're doing whatever you're doing. In years time, you will realize, you've been lucky and you've got a BIG advantage just because you have been working hard and been patient. Good luck everybody! :)