Every introvert needs to learn this
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- čas přidán 15. 06. 2024
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Chapters:
00:00 - Introduction
01:57 - Solo learning
03:34 - Consider your environment
04:48 - Learn your limits
05:21 - Communicate your needs
05:33 - Don't try to be someone else
06:17 - It's not a safety blanket
07:28 - Don't self-isolate
07:56 - Don't gereralize
08:41 - To my younger self
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From one introvert to another i respect and admire your honesty , you are wonderful woman and i wish a lot more people would understand and finally stop judging introverts like us , what a cruel world we live in , anyway keep it up lana you are doing fantastic
Girlll, you should write a book!
😔😌 We need to complete each other. We don't need one person to complete us.
😶🌫 The one thing we all have in common is we all have the capacity to love for the people around us.
Commen? Friendliness is pretty commen in all beings.
The hard part about being an introvert is definitely finding a balance between wanting to be alone at times but not being lonely. It’s good to surround yourself with people that you love and genuinely want to be around
That's why there's merit in keeping at a distance people you find are not aligned with who you are and your values and keeping close your true intimate friends in a tight circle whom you find solace, and peace in. I firsthand have known hiw difficult it is to keep the former types of people at a distance especially if they think you're there friend when really you consider them only as a casual and civil type of friendship
From talking to extroverts, especially the highly empathic ones, I can tell you that they have the same problem. Their balance is just one the other end of the spectrum. Like Lana said, it's a range, not black and white.
Hope it feels good to know that we share this problem even with the "opposite" :).
I don't personally know you, but one of the reasons I subscribed to your channel was because you seem to stay true to yourself, you don't put on a new personality and pretend to sound or act a in a different way than you actually are for the most part, and that's something that brings comfort and relatability to us introverted fellas✨️
As an introvert myself, I truly appreciate these life lessons, Lana! You are truly wise beyond your years. Love your inspiration and knowledge. It shows that even an old guy like me (62) I can still learn from those much younger. Keep being your awesome self!
For me it also took a while to accept that I am an introverted person. And my first lesson was to put myself at the first place and got as much rest my body and mind needs
😮
For me it's more that most people are boring. There is no depth, no excited dreams, no spontanious ideas and above all no openess. With the right people, I like to socialize otherwise I prefer to be by myself
"We can't all be great speakers, we need great listeners". Lana, thank you so much, I'm so glad that I found your CZcams channel. Your videos help me to get through the days, especially the hard ones, and they give me comfort and your voice as well. Once again thank you
Knowing my limits and empowering myself to say no has been game changing! Great video Lana 🧡
As an introvert, this video hit home! The 9 essential introvert life lessons are like a survival guide to navigating the extroverted world. From the power of solitude to embracing our strengths, these lessons are pure wisdom. Time to celebrate my introverted superpowers.
Thank you so much for this video, as an introverted person, I started to learn to accept myself the way I am, but sometimes it gets hard, and this video was like honey to my soul.
Love your content and your voice is calm and relaxing, not monotone.
Your channel was the very first I subscribed to and I was one of the first…I think you had less than 200 subscribers at the time. It’s been great seeing you and your channel grow and change over the years. I look forward to viewing your content in the years to come.
Thank you, your calm tone, combined with your excellent advices, are really validating! For instance, the way you ended the video with “we are all needed” is truly soothing
Hey Lana, the major reason that i sticked to your channel and watch your videos regularly is your extremely soothing voice!!!!!!!!!
thank you. this was so comforting to watch. never felt seen in so long. realized i just havent been accepting my way of being and i ended up hating myself. i feel better now~
Your videos are like a letter from Best friend, also having to listen to your calm voice it's like a nice ASMR.
I appreciate your efforts
Thank so much Lana to share this part of an introvert and more blessing
If I understood your question correctly, the one thing that I think might define introverts or extraverts is whether they feel they charge their batteries through solitude or through being around people. I agree that it's on a spectrum but, like you, am grateful to know there are so many of us out there. You have such wisdom for someone your age; I really enjoy your content and appreciate what you share :). And, I have been wondering if you might consider posting more content on your life as a youtuber...some of the mechanics, tips and ideas...?
Thanks Lana.....I love and appreciate every bit of you!
uuuh theres the new backgrouuuund 😍 i cant wait for the home tour (which i hope we'll be getting soon)
also wonderful video as always
She’s back!! It hasn’t been a while but it feels like forever 🥺
I love your voice. Always so soothing to listen to.
Hello Lana!!! I consider myself as an extrovert, always was like that. And people who knew me at younger age agree with that. But with the maturity I turn that into introvert. I feel more comfort being that way. Why, because the most of the cases it let me have the control of my life easily than if I look extrovert. Sometimes, I got in a group of people and I don't say almost nothing, I just enjoy being silent in the bottom of the room watching what the others do. Not participating except necessary. You said that your voice seems monotone but in my humble opinion your voice, how you pronounce is one of the reasons I'm here. Your tone and the words you use are very attractive. If you share time with yourself and you learn how to behave with the most important person in this world (that means YOU), I believe that once you are with the other will be something special, I bet it will be. And yes, Lana we need people because we have interactions and those affect our world but I never feel out of context. I managed to find ways to not be glue but swimming around. I have hard times also, I'm human being not a superhero and I don't pretend being one. Have a wonderful day Lana!!! Bye!!!
I believe the one thing in common we all have is that we have aspects of ourselves we don't like and are insecure about. The person filling the room might actually be really insecure and that's why they feel the need to have everyone notice them. Same for the person cracking all the jokes and the introvert person may want to be unseen because of those same insecurities. We all basically have insecurities we just react to them in different ways.
There's nothing wrong with you, Lana! There are many folk just like you and I'm one of them too. I've turned my energy towards learning to play the keyboard. Introverts like to be creative without drawing attention to themselves. I expect that, like me, you are more comfortable in your own space rather than feeling a need to seek out the company of other people. This is not to say that you don't want friends, but would prefer to have one to one friendships and not a whole bunch of them!! If I'm with more than three or four people at any one time, it can be overwhelming. Also, I know what you mean about feeling exhausted after being with other folk. Keep doing what you are doing. I think you have worked things out very well for yourself.
I've always thought I was an introvert but MUCHH later in life like a TIDAL WAVE I felt a MAJOR shift mentally..I foundout I have autism. Wanting to stay home, do what interest ME is a must...all else makes me feel uneasy but I'm happier now than I've ever been, KEEPING IT REAL!🔥💯🙌 Love your wisdom and insight, SHINE ON☀😊✨💫
Glad to hear when you said finally seen, because that’s whay I felt when I watched your video back then
This video definitely resonates with me. Great video too❤
I'm an introvert. And to answer your question : I think the one thing we all have in common is self reflection. We take times to think, during/middle/after the activities/events, about ourselves, the person sit next to us, the topic that touch our heart etc. And about wanting to be alone, I find that I like to have solitude in the middle of business lol...
Thank you for your endless hard work 🤍
really liked this video keep em coming!!
I appreciate your lessons, for a while I was so introvert, but step by step get out my comfort zone and I tried communicate my mindsets or my needs to people around me and people starting coming to me and I to them. Now I have a lovely social circle and have friend so wonderful I can trust on them. My advice is you try get out your comfort zone and live experiences with new people
oh how I can relate💕 thank you Lana!🌹
thanks for the edit at 8:11 - I'm extroverted in a sense that I get energized by social interaction, but I'm not a loud person that would lead the conversation.
Been watching you for over a year now, I really love your hair, and you're gorgeous, too. 💗
oh yayyyy love you lana came at the right time LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just wanted to say you are wrong about one thing, you are definitely a ray of sunshine, from the way you smile to the way you talk, you are definitely one!
This was really comforting ❤
I like to think that each person is like a snowflake, unique and special, never identical to another! It’s important to consider that everyone has their own way of being, but we definitely shouldn’t make them any less, we’re still all the same thing, human. Respect, care, and always love everyone not matter who they are or what their personality is!
I never thought of it that way thank you 😊
Your explanation of feeling like you're apart of something while also being alone on skill share, basically getting the best of both worlds, is what a lot of gamers feel like and is why they game so much. Many of them have a hard time connecting to people in real life and doing that in a videogame feels safer and easier. Ik as a former hardcore gamer myself.
I've never heard anyone talk about feeling drained or needing time to themselves after being around a group of people before.
I definitely have this also.
I didn't even know that I'm an introvert. I'm pretty loud, friendly and talkative. However I often need alone time for true rest and almost all the time at the parties I feel terribly tired and anxious. I thought that I just can't set my mood appropriatly and tried to force myself to behave the way I "normally would". But now I understand that it may realy be part of my identity type, which actully gives me freedom to feel 'not okay' at some social occasions, so now I can find a more tender an true approach to myself. Thank you so much for the video!! I really got some food for thought
Great video! Lana
listening to you talk about "not being the loudest & thereby charming girl in the group" made me feel seen too.
Being an introvert has its challenges, but also its privileges! Welcome to the club!
Wow. This is mindblowing.❤ Make a video on your yoga journey.☕
In psychology, we learned that introverts (from the man who coined the phrase) are defined as people who lose energy in social settings/usually need to “recharge” after, and extroverts are those that gain energy/feel more invigorated in social settings :)
I think that one of the greatest ironies is that, when people are asked what qualities should leader have, they usually say the ones related to extroverts, but when asked to name some leaders, most will mention leaders that are actually introverts (both good and evil ones), and they will be completely clueless about that.
Also, for those who are feeling bad about thinking you're boring, you are not obliged to entertain other people, and most importantly, you're not responsible for other people's happines.
The one thing we have in common? We easily get sensory overload in group situations, and need alone time to decompress/recharge.
You are an amazing person❤️❤️❤️
*It's difficult being an introvert but you just have to do what makes you happy even though some people won't understand it.*
To answer your question : I think the one thing we all have in common is that we are trying our best, in order to accept ourselves, on an ongoing quest to happiness. I wanted to share one thing about introversion that stood on me. Modern society makes it sound like a label, I had once a family doctor (who died) saying that I had "to cure my introversion". Sometimes we think we're introverted but we're actually just in the wrong place (the part of self-isolating)
Hey ! Currently I'm preparing for NEET exam in India as I want to pursue the medical field. I'm in 12th class and I think that from the time I started for this preparation I'm like getting detached from my school friends. Am I getting introverted or it happens with every busy scheduled person ?
@@aayush4675I'd say it happens to every busy scheduled person and doesn't influence how introverted or extraverted you are. Introversion is a dimensional personality trait you are born with and keep your whole life. Dimensional in this regard means there is introversion on the one end and extraversion on the other end of a spectrum and most people fall somewhere in between leaning more introverted or extraverted. So a busy learning schedule shouldn't change something about your introversion or extraversion. It just can tell you something about how you handle such a situation considering as Lana said that every human will miss having social contacts at some point.
Good luck for your exam!
I like the sound of your voice. It is one of the reasons I watch/listen to you. Have you cut your hair. You should do a video on your hair.
It's ok to feel boring. I feel the same way. I no longer want to feel the pressure of bein the funny one. Sometimes it's fun to be entertained by someone else rather than being the entertaining one.
I feel you, I know exactly what your talking about.
5:53 As for me, you have an amazing voice, Lana ❤
Big problem with this video. No one has mentioned it in the comments, so I will, no matter how much I hate being "that guy".
- The lack of footage of the colors of autumn at Stockholm is excruciating. I mean, you are so cute and everything, your new place looks beautiful (congratulations), and the interior design skillshare class works; but for us, the intertropical people, a few frames of the Swedish autumn forest is not enough. We want more. I hope this gets fixed in the next video, otherwise my "like" will be missing. (imagine a frowny face trying to look like being serious about not giving you a like).
Great video.
🙂👍 Just remember 🌲🍁🐕
i myself didn't accept my introversion but acted as an extrovert and acted way too much now i have been battling with depression since 4 years because i lost my head and now at my darkest times now learning about who i am. I learnt no need to act i can be myself
We all add value in our own little way -wise words
2:10 Skillshare recommendation
3:41 unfavorable enviroment
4:49 learn your limits
5:21 communicate your needs
5:35 be yourself
6:21 don' t use labels as safety blankets
7:29 don' t self-isolate
7:57 don 't generalize
Lana pls be back with your podcast i miss your presence there so muchh
I have always been an introvert. Maybe because I was always hated in highschool that it made me enjoy my company. But the moment I left high school I became more like a social butterfly yet still enjoyed spending my Fridays alone watching my tvshows in my room and wearing headphones to feel disconnected. The more I grow up, the more I meet people who want to befriend me and the more my introverted friends are waiting for me to come to lunch break or parties so that they feel more comfortable meeting people. I would say I have outgrown myself and now Im the last one finishing my lunch because Im talking all the time and making jokes to make people more comfortable. So when I tell people that I used to be introverted no one believes me. Im 27 now and I am still a bit introverted. For example on the weekend, I need one day of being completely alone. Guess I am an introverted extroverted??
i think that common thing probably is that, regardless of the spectrum of introversion...some may be people oriented and may have fun with others, but all of us feel the true "peace" when we're alone.
Great video ❤❤
Everyone is either an introvert or extrovert. It simply comes down to how you feel after interacting with other people, if you feel tired after interacting with other people then your an introvert else a if you feel normal or re-energized after an interaction your an extrovert. But like you said their is a broad spectrum of people within these two groups who display both characteristics. An introvert can feign being an extrovert around people but feel tired after the interaction. Doesn't mean they are extroverts but simply introverts with good social skills and cues and vice versa. And when you find yourself being an introvert and sometimes still feeling normal or even better after an interaction, you have to self-retrospect over multiple scenarios of this experience to see whether if you were an extrovert all along and just had really bad social skills and cues.
"Today, I wasn't in the best spirits as I attended a party and found myself struggling to engage socially in the typical manner. While I did manage to have some fun initially, there came a point where I simply wanted to make my exit. It became evident that I exhibited behavior that could be perceived as weird, leading to a recurring thought loop in my mind that continually labels me as an inadequate companion for social gatherings. I realize the importance of being mindful of my environment. Thanks!"
Thank you for talking about what introversion / being an introvert _actually_ means instead of this nonsense that's so common where people think introverts are anti-social or shy or what not.
I'd say our above average introspective biological hardware and software is the commonality between introverts. Also, Just realized matcha lattes and 9 hours of sleep literally fuels my social battery! Thanks!
When I was young i thought something is genuinely wrong with me until i fount out beeing an introvert is a thing. After that it was a lot easier to accept myself as I am.
I'm soo introverted haha people always assume at first glance that i'm mean or cold, but when they take time to get to know me, they discover that i'm not at all those adjectives.
When I was in middle school i got bullied several times bc i didn't know how to make friend and nobody talked to me in my class, or else toxic girls would try to befriend me (in order to "use" me lol), and i was incredibly ashamed of my introvertion my whole school years. Now I'm in senior year of high school and i've learnt to embrace my introversion, and to not try to be someone i'm not. Plus, i've met my best friend in sophomore year and she's also introverted (less than me though!), so she's literally the only real friend i have in school and i'm super satisfied about this.
I wish I had a sister like you🌸
Girl, you should write a book
Always giving us great advice Lana, thank you
I enjoyed the video. I’m kind of struggling to figure out where I fit in the world. I’m 31 now. For most of my life I was perfectly content to just do my own thing, or play video games or watch shows. I’ve had a couple significant romantic relationships. Some of my coworkers claim I’m not introverted, because when I’m at my jobs I’m smiling and talking to customers or my coworkers. I laugh and joke. I try to explain that for me, that IS my socialization. When I’m off I often want to be left to my own devices.
I’ve had this strong drive within the last two years to try and get out and do things again. I think part of this for me is me wanting to have a relationship again. I tell myself “if I don’t get out there I won’t meet someone. They’re not going to just show up at my door.” So I am not sure if I would be as interested in being social if I had a girlfriend or whatnot. But I picture my older parents being gone one day, and a life without friends or a significant other seems… empty. Maybe I should get a pet of some kind. It’s just me in my place. No roommates. No pets.
I agree to everything you said
I've been an introvert a large portion of my life -- but when I spend time around people for some amount of time: I switch roles and become an extrovert. Then when the social environment disappears, I get back to being an introvert. I have stopped my introvertedness to be a hindrance to my social life, but then again, there are some inherent traits in me that just don't work the way I want things to be.
I love the part when you said that "knowing about yourself makes your world bigger"... Oh and the last thing you said should be framed idk about you guys
Vlog videos pleasee❤❤❤
Lana sweet you end ol your family God bless you tank you
This is mine 3rd video of your and in the first one I got you are introvert. You seemd very calm and have those slow down spoking words which all introverts most perefered it is in dna I guess in the other hand you seem also like you don't have the energy like you are bored or better to say you are not own it. Thats the thing I think all introverts has to learn and it is to own it. I remeber once upon the time I told people in big hall during a speach I am introvert but I like to go out of my comfort zone and everyone was shocked after a couple of hours because I started to open up alot to a strangers. Anyway long story short if you don't want to seemd as shy person you have to own your introversion now when I do a test I got entj...I prefer more introvert people around me cause I know they are more true and honest to their selfs but also can not stand an introvert who is not working on his/her self to go out of the box. In mwtter of fact my BFF is extrovert 100% complusion descision loudest women in the room but she struggles with those things and I am very happy when I see her to work on herself. Ofc no one is not perfect and never gonna be but we can at least be better person to us, to world, to anything around us. God bless all of you, peace!
7:56: I would humbly suggest that "that one thing" is our common humanity, our identity as noble beings - those things that are innate to humans that make us unique in the animal kingdom. But CZcams comment sections are not a great forum for ontological investigation and I just deleted about three paragraphs. Here's a quote instead:
"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms-to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way."
~ Viktor Frankl
Tbh, i had a time when i was so like lost my self when close to extrovert person, like u said a girl usuallh being bubly and cheerful, it makes me questined my self wheter i need to change in order people to treat me like her. But at tge end i just know the fact that not everyonw like that bubly kind of type.
Is that one thing the desire to feel understood and cared for?
I would think the one thing that all introverts have in common are the limited endurance social interactions. I think introverts could only handle a few hours of socializing before they have to recharge. Even if they enjoy spending time with people.
Not about the introvert topic, but I miss your podcasts😢Are there any chances that we get a new episode?
Everyone got a heart... But someone heart it's more sensitive and more gentle one...
I actually really like her voice.
When you want to take revenge but you don't have the energy to do it so you just look for peace. And then one day you just realise that you're the only one who can understand yourself better than anyone and then you start caring yourself and that's the day you realise you're not sad lonely or depressed you're just an introvert and then you get sudden wave of acceptance and everything suddenly gets quieter than usual and you're now healed. ❤
you have billion dollar smile
getting excited to change into PJ's and cuddling with blanket is no embarassing it's heaven for some people and we should be happy that we tend to seek peace when the outer world just fake parties and things that is just outer fun and no inner fun!
Heard this somewhere as to the ways to define an introvert and this one's the easiest, find out if you gain or drain your energy whilst being around people..
Drain - prolly an introvert
Gain - prolly an extrovert
Again it's a spectrum so there can be exceptions..
Like the old times 🫶
There was once a definition of introversion and extraversion by a (or several) psychologists. Introverts recharge when alone, extraverts when under people. I think the definition needs to be adapted a little, since we are all on a range and not one or the other. The adaptation is: Introversion recharges when alone, extraversion when under people.
My essential lesson and understanding myself as an introvert: pick good unity and good division and reject bad unity and bad division. Notice I’m only “not introvert” or perfectly fitting in a good unity. In good division one side will obviously witness me at least on the bad side as potentially introvert but it might be also perceived extravert especially if I lead the split. Rejecting bad unity and bad division is definitely where I’ll be perceived as an introvert. Like I won’t follow any crowd I really disagree for the sake of socializing, no thanks I don’t mind crowds or socializing but I have to see myself as part of it otherwise why be there. As far as rejecting bad division, I’ll also probably be perceived as an introvert when there’s division and arguments about trivial not important at all matters among a group, yeah no thanks I’ll either leave both sides or try to talk some sense but I’ll probably leave both sides sooner than later and again be perceived as an introvert.
Happy Diwali 🎇🎆
Too many fireworks for an introvert! Even in London
Mother posted!
I just feel so confused about me I don't want to be alone but whenever i'm with people I just feel I don't fit( tbh slowly I think im just being too much on this situation)
I think one thing we introverts all have in common is that we need some alone time to recharge our mental and emotional batteries. Whereas extroverts prefer the opposite to recharge.
A need to keep a certain amount of space reserved for internal reflection, calculation, emotion
Maybe related to lack mentality we think we’ll run out of stuff if we let it all out there 😂