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The #1 Abuse Tactic Used By Narcissists

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  • čas přidán 29. 04. 2023
  • In today's video Jill explains one of the most damaging forms of abuse that all narcissists and parental alienators use on the target and the children.
    Jill Wise, otherwise known as The Enlightened Target, is a life long survivor of narcissistic abuse. She was raised by a malignant narcissist and married to a malignant narcissist, she has endured years of parental alienation, has repeatedly been targeted by narcissists throughout her life. She has an intimate understanding of all aspects of narcissistic abuse and Cptsd. She uses her experience and what she has learned to help educate others and bring awareness to narcissistic abuse. She is also a Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coach and works with clients all over the world heal from the trauma of narcissistic abuse, parental alienation and Complex Ptsd.
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    or send her an email at theenlightenedtarget@gmail.com. She conducts face to face meetings on the computer using zoom or over the phone. Many times getting the help and support from a professional who has lived through this is a necessary step to healing.
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Komentáře • 140

  • @joshuaanzalone2060
    @joshuaanzalone2060 Před rokem +104

    The stalking is absolutely sickening and disgusting. These people literally think you are an object. I am a human being. I'm not a toy and I don't serve anyone.

    • @hasansarhan9296
      @hasansarhan9296 Před rokem +4

      👍👍

    • @S4V0LAEN3N
      @S4V0LAEN3N Před rokem

      I'm convinced that "intelligence agencies" even recruit exactly that type of personalities... because they are natural talents to their needs.
      Then those _gang stalkers_ harrass and torture activists and ppl. knowing too much... *and get paid from doing that shit!*

    • @jessmason2112
      @jessmason2112 Před rokem +3

      Let me tell you a story.✌️

    • @franksimmons9242
      @franksimmons9242 Před rokem +5

      Stalking. This may sound random but I had a third party relative send a message through a fourth party.
      The reason I'm concerned is because I know where this originated.
      One thing about me enough is enough. Something about a family reunion after I've made it crystal clear I have no dealings with them. None.
      I made it clear through the fourth party and the third party. Let it get back to where started. Don't f*** with me.
      Do not f*** with me.
      Don't make me go James Brown payback on you

    • @POV00005
      @POV00005 Před rokem +1

      🎯🎯🎯

  • @GJCHSMM
    @GJCHSMM Před rokem +38

    Remember also...threats can be made to your well being without someone saying a word.

    • @michignamymichigan
      @michignamymichigan Před rokem +5

      Took me decades to see, that look was sinister. No words, those words were already in my head. They always got the upper hand.

    • @csh43166
      @csh43166 Před rokem +2

      Exactly...

    • @michignamymichigan
      @michignamymichigan Před rokem +1

      I realize being left out in conversation started from the beginning. I was intimidated by pronunciations and my small vocabulary. I was not abnormal or inferior. Looking to them for guidance made me feel hopelessly separated. They aren't that close to one another, they were putting on a show. Step away and you can see it is not you. Fixing you doesn't make them better. Being you more fully is the way to heal and grow. Away from the abuse, you can know yourself. Blessings all. 🌻

    • @jodizellmer994
      @jodizellmer994 Před rokem +1

      Exactly! All someone has to do is get themselves mixed up in a bad situation. The internet would be a perfect place for getting yourself into trouble. Even if you had no idea what you were getting yourself into at the time, you should still be smart and use good judgement.

  • @kristinmeyer489
    @kristinmeyer489 Před rokem +13

    These invisible chains are exactly why targets of organized stalking and harassment refer to it as being like human trafficking. When the same methods are used, it IS THE SAME.

  • @Cre80s
    @Cre80s Před rokem +20

    The "remote control" coercive parental power thing is described very well in "the baby elephant principle", with how grown, powerful elephants can be held in place by a chain to a stake in the ground that in reality is utterly insufficient if the elephant decides to just leave anyway, but since they're conditioned from youth from when it WAS enough against their tiny body, the trainers can use it to control them. It's basically gaslighting the elephant into submitting.

  • @ChartiseWilliamsAvonRep
    @ChartiseWilliamsAvonRep Před 11 měsíci +3

    They love trying to control someone but don’t have control over their own actions. Just a sad type of person. It’s a generational curse that needs to be addressed

  • @EYE_GOTCHA
    @EYE_GOTCHA Před rokem +36

    You are describing my mother so accurately. She was very good at what she did. She destroyed me and my father, pitted us against each other for years.
    My brother and sister, her two “favorite” children, managed to escape her abuse by moving thousands of miles away. 😐

    • @cadoo5591
      @cadoo5591 Před rokem +6

      My mother also, I have three siblings and we actually live within an hour or two of each other but we never speak. She did a unique job on each and every one of us growing up, she died from alcoholism at age 49 - not soon enough for any of us to save ourselves from her destruction.

  • @helenduffy6642
    @helenduffy6642 Před rokem +9

    My daughter stayed 2 nights as she was doing course for her job in Sydney. The first night was ok my narc asked her about her family as he doesn't contact them. The second night he asked her about her course and she was explaining things but he wouldn't listening to what she had to say. He was manipulating her and being nasty. She said to him you are gaslighting me. She said I come to visit because your my dad and I love you but you always make it very hard. He is a very difficult man. I think he hates people being successful and happy. We has never praised our 3 daughters for anything. I used to blame his alcoholism when my kids were little but he was an narcissist. Sorry if I have over done things but this is my story. I love to hear people's share, we can help each other. ❤❤

  • @debiburns8228
    @debiburns8228 Před rokem +5

    Usually isolation is implemented right away without the target being aware once aware you have been alienated from everyone you loved and thought loved you

  • @justangelzaragoza
    @justangelzaragoza Před rokem +21

    I was one of those people who believed my abuser could read my mind. It eventually led me to having a mental breakdown and develop strong feelings of paranoia. I remember them also going through all my things, not allowing me to talk to anyone, holding me hostage in my own house, and every time i tried to stand up for myself, i was beaten and verbally abused

    • @alimccreery755
      @alimccreery755 Před rokem

      Thank you for sharing. I’m living in the home of a narcissist who is doing the same thing to me. I’m not married to him nor am I his girlfriend so I’ve been confused as to what legal right does this person have to keep me hostage in his house and use abuse by proxy on me. Before I knew what he was I was going through a very difficult time and he offered to help me financially which I realize now was a big mistake. I’m soon to be moving out and my brother and a few other people in my life are being very supportive. Apparently my employment has been affected by what’s called blacklisted and now that I’m 68 years old I’m receiving my SS and a small pension which he can’t touch. That doesn’t mean this guy isn’t going to use his nasty tricks on me, I’m totally prepared. I have a friend who is flying up to help me move back into his house and get away from my abusers. I understand perfectly what everyone here has gone through except I don’t have children, two of my cats have died and my little dog passed away a couple of weeks ago. I’m still devastated but I need to keep going. I was being targeted by rumors that I was being abusive towards my dog which was an outright lie, now she’s gone so no one can use her to get to me and they did. I’m keeping the faith and I’m going to keep in touch with this site in letting my support people know that I’ve moved and away. Take care everybody stay safe. I’m hoping everyone like me gets the opportunity to get free and start the healing journey ❤

    • @esmagrace8951
      @esmagrace8951 Před 8 měsíci

      ​@@alimccreery755 i Hope that you both know that god, WHO created you, He LOVES you both sooo much. May He heal all your wounds, inside and on your Body. He can be your father, and send miricals in your Life. You are more valuable then diamonds, don't ever forget that!!
      Greetings from germany

  • @name_o_person
    @name_o_person Před rokem +8

    You just spelled out both my childhood and my marriage.
    I still have difficulty feeling comfortable spending my own money, doing things I enjoy, and even being myself.
    The saddest part is I get the feeling many think I was the problem. I'm sorry you can't look past seeing me as a man long enough to believe I can be abused too.

  • @warriormom5843
    @warriormom5843 Před rokem +15

    Fantastic overview of these deprave “entities.” Also regarding isolating from family, they can also choose someone like me, who had no family other than an unwell mother who was soon to succumb to her illness, being left with no one other than her friends on her side. Yes Jill, they are calculated depravity walking this Earth-devils.

  • @deebeal7445
    @deebeal7445 Před rokem +11

    This applies to grandparent alienation which is pervasive in our culture and is highly abusive to the grandkids. They will face abandonment issues for years.

  • @johnrogers1663
    @johnrogers1663 Před rokem +5

    I completely agree with your views on the consequences that should be imposed on these narcissistic individuals. Especially the ones that are malignant psychopaths and just don’t care. Hit them in the pocket book where it counts.
    Although they would just blame everyone but themselves. They just don’t believe they can be wrong.

  • @helenduffy6642
    @helenduffy6642 Před rokem +12

    A very good talk. I can relate to the control as I was a young bride 21yrs moved from Scotland to Australia, I had no friends or family there. I didn't know until 18 months ago what was happening to me. Gaslighting and manipulation, someone asked me was he an narcissist I said I don't know as I had never heard of these words. I am so grateful to these channels for the education. I have cried a lot the last few months realising all the things he has done to me. No love hugs or anything only had sex when he wanted it. I'm now 74yrs. I have lovely supportive friends and family. They are very cruel and toxic people. I have not spoken to him for 7 months. I'm enjoying myself and I don't care about him. He will die a lonely old man. Thank again ❤

    • @Grrrrrrr123
      @Grrrrrrr123 Před rokem +1

      Same here out a year I’m 60 now but am never looking back

    • @caroleminke6116
      @caroleminke6116 Před rokem

      65 & free at last of everyone!!!!!!

    • @helenduffy6642
      @helenduffy6642 Před rokem

      @@caroleminke6116 congratulations and take care of yourself. God is good.

  • @allanbabcock9678
    @allanbabcock9678 Před rokem +18

    Thank-you Jill this is what I am going through right now. My children are older in their 30s and she still uses this tactic. My youngest has schizoaffective disorder and this is totally hideous, she will have a payday. Thanks Jill

  • @holyenforcer8200
    @holyenforcer8200 Před rokem +5

    I’ve been dealing with it in Teaxes and nobody would help me in anyway

  • @manapeace
    @manapeace Před rokem +9

    “If you don’t live your life according to the idealized mask I have of you, I’ll disinherit you as punishment.” is my dad. It’s never worked with me but recognizing it as financial abuse helps motivate me to limit contact.

    • @thirstonhowellthebird
      @thirstonhowellthebird Před rokem +2

      Wow, that’s exactly what happened in my family and trust me you will be disinherited, so if you’re low contact, hoping for some kind of inheritance, you might as well cut the ties now just prepare yourself for it and don’t believe anything he tells you about any money that he claims he will leave you because I can promise you you will get nothing. It’s just the final act of control that they smirk off into their grave with lol just prepare yourself for it if you get something great if not, you won’t be devastated.

    • @manapeace
      @manapeace Před rokem

      @@thirstonhowellthebird Yep… his last phone call was intentionally cruel and he was clearly trolling for an emotional reaction. I sensed “the smirk” when he hung up. I’m expecting nothing when he passes.
      I learned something from this… a gift. Narcs obviously live behind a mask, but also project a mask onto others. If you individuate and make your own decisions in life (deviate from their idealized image of you) you must be punished. I now have a better understanding of the source of my family’s intentional cruelty. (My desire to be self directed)
      Thanks for the validation and support!

  • @chxwv
    @chxwv Před rokem +11

    I remember as a child , and perhaps even as a teenager I felt like my parents knew everything that I thought , like they knew everything about me , if not more , than I did myself

    • @chxwv
      @chxwv Před rokem

      Is that the reason the two relationships I have had in my life , I ended up with two of the most toxic women? one causing me an internal blunt trauma that I’m still struggling with every day , year and a half after what she dismissed as just an accident , and started to act like she was the victim !

    • @franksimmons9242
      @franksimmons9242 Před rokem +1

      One of their catch phrases was just that. I know you better than you know yourself. Translation trust me over yourself.
      Two of my sick siblings tried that on me.
      It's a line or phrase sounds good in a movie they just mimic it. No originality.

  • @YouilAushana
    @YouilAushana Před rokem +7

    Yes, the abuse can turn into a prison!
    People always tell me, "get over it." or things could've been way worse, like poverty or disability.

    • @paula622
      @paula622 Před rokem

      Those are the very people you do not share your pain with, not everyone you associate with deserves to hear your story

    • @mainakduttamajumder2473
      @mainakduttamajumder2473 Před 7 měsíci

      Just don't beat yourself up about it. Take it easy.

  • @jaimhaas5170
    @jaimhaas5170 Před rokem +6

    Very important topic. I don't hear many people discussing this ever.

  • @AmourofgodShinelight
    @AmourofgodShinelight Před 3 měsíci

    Thank you so much for this Jill, Absolutely tremendous, They throw, Hate, Threats and abuse when you stand up to them and expose them, They can't handle truth and the light shining at them, Thank you for your kindness and understanding, Peace, love and respect to you and everyone, Thank you universe, All glory to the most high God 😃💚💗💙💜🌈🌌📚👽😇🦁🕆🦄⚖🍄😊♱

  • @Ian140265
    @Ian140265 Před rokem +4

    Thank You Jill, great video. Very important. I have been going through this for many years, cannot escape, so i permanetly ignore the abuser who lives in my home.

  • @shannonjones196
    @shannonjones196 Před 8 měsíci

    It's so interesting that I found your channel through my narcissistic husband who I'm going through a divorce with. His sister has been telling him I'm a narcissist. He filed for divorce, has refused to move out, is video taping me and monitoring everything and the financial abuse has been unreal. He had me sale my car a year and a half ago and now leaves me and my son and 10 month old daughter to walk in the freezing cold or rely on others. He loves going around telling everyone how victimized and abused he has been.

  • @LION-on4gd
    @LION-on4gd Před rokem +3

    🎯🎯🎯...cowards as they are!!

  • @Red-hot-sonic-fan
    @Red-hot-sonic-fan Před rokem +3

    Thank you so much for the content. I’m still trying to get my head wrapped around it because it’s so bizarre that people act like this, like they were reading the same script. My NM had me thinking for years I owed her money and o worked 2 or 3 jobs and had nothing to show for it while staying in her house. She used to tell me that she knew what I was thinking before I was thinking it. She seems to enjoy humiliating me in front of friends and family so isolated. I’m still having a hard time believing all the things she did to me and other people don’t believe it either so it leaves you constantly doubting yourself. Thanks so much for the content to help survivors validate our experiences.

  • @rodneymartel452
    @rodneymartel452 Před rokem +5

    My malignant narcissistic father did all this and more. I also observed this similar behavior with the Puddle who was the mother of my adult children as well

  • @vanessamorey3812
    @vanessamorey3812 Před rokem +3

    Youre describing 20yrs of my upbringing...
    I dumped my family decades ago, cut my tubes, never looked back...
    Absolutely disgusting and evil....
    This 💩 must 🛑

  • @markcooper9033
    @markcooper9033 Před rokem +7

    "This channel is devoted..."
    Thank you ms Jill for your devotion in providing information and validation to us who have suffered/are suffering from narc abuse.🙋‍♂️
    I might add to what you've just shared is the idea of covert coercive control. My narc wont "overtly" threaten BUT... I am controlled by her "covert" means that I find out about indirectly.
    Keep up the good work. We are still being helped by you devotion😊🙋‍♂️👍

  • @joshuaanzalone2060
    @joshuaanzalone2060 Před rokem +3

    They won't abuse me. I won't tolerate it.

  • @JKDVIPER
    @JKDVIPER Před 3 měsíci

    We love your material JILL. Both of us over here. I hope you have found that safe zone and healthy/happy supporters to make it a kingdom with no end. I really mean that. 😉👈🏻💯I’ve been coming on for awhile now. 4:17 relating to the materials. Coercive control, would be like when out of the two people, only one does the driving in life. They put it out there just like you said, about “I’ll leave you alone; no house, no friends, and isolate yourself from everyone.” Wow. That was her (my girls) exact situation with her x husband. That was really revealing for me. Thank you. 😊💡🤟💯6:44 sticking points for me to go back to and show Jackie. 😉✊5:20 ruining someone’s life and reputation. Thanks again! Another key revealing point coach. 😎9:19 I just wanted to say, and I never noticed this until now, because you mentioned them being greedy for cash, but he had stolen the tax check money and kept like 5000 for himself. Just the way you described your x husband I believe. He literally took ALL THE FAMILY CASH and closed about 3-4 accounts which put on cartoons and electricity for the kid. So... it’s crazy. 😬👈🏻💯

  • @mendyviola
    @mendyviola Před rokem

    Leaving a relationship like that is just as dangerous if not more so than staying in one. Once you leave, you are now “stolen property” which often ends in a violent encounter. I know this intimately. After leaving, I was raped, stalked, my home broken into with “clues” that it was him doing it, and everything else he could do to gain control over me again, no matter how many times he was in and out of jail. And I was a one of the “strong ones” who left the relationship early (

  • @mamabear71234
    @mamabear71234 Před 10 měsíci

    I've been through alot of narcissistic abuse. Both of my parents were narcissists too. One way I discovered to gain an upper hand against them is by telling others about their nasty habits. My ex husband dumped all the bills on me. I finally got him out of the house with a restraining order. I moved and went no contact. These narcs are abusive and controlling. So when it's time to slam the hammer down on them you have to be serious. Had I not been through so much abuse with my parents, I wouldn't have had the strength to use reinforcement against my ex narcissistic husband as well as the father of my child. The father of my child was worse than my ex husband. But i had to go no contact with both narcs. I also had to cutt off my family because they sided with my son's father whom they didn't even know before he contacted them on Facebook. I am extremely selective with who I trust.

  • @spaideman7850
    @spaideman7850 Před rokem +3

    7:03 has no alternative until the victim accept their lies, 100% truth. That's what i felt all these while, i felt my mom is treating me like a dog, influencing(by lies and her made up stories) my relatives not to 'feed'(trust) me until i'm hungry enough to go back to her lap. Very painful emotional attack that I wish nobody else would experience. I'm surprise narcissist's character totally 100% matches her character, all these while I thought everybody's character is unique.

  • @jennielai2459
    @jennielai2459 Před rokem

    Thank you Jill for being you ❤❤❤

  • @helenduffy6642
    @helenduffy6642 Před rokem +2

    My narc even disconnected my automatic transmission in my car. I called the NRMA as I didn't know what he did to my car as it wouldn't start. The guy was there for ages and didn't seem to know what was wrong, I said my husband is an alcoholic and he did something to it. The man really looked into it then he said he has disconnected your automatic transmission. When the man went back to his van he was writing something down. Thanks everyone.

    • @qw3rty302
      @qw3rty302 Před rokem +1

      My narc dad would try to withhold the insurance and registration on the car even though I had to use it for work I drove around without it for a week straight and hounded him to give it back to me then he gets new registration and tells me when he leaves it on the counter “hey it’s here and you don’t really need it to drive around” and I told him I do and took it and put it back in the car and told him I’m not going to jail over this and thank god I did and recorded him saying it to remind myself I’m not crazy!

  • @elainesmith5313
    @elainesmith5313 Před rokem +1

    My Narc mother was a cohesive controller when I was growning up. And I believed her well into my 20's. But finally figured out that she was Gaslighting me.
    She didn't know squat! Lots of Hot Air. And then there was the x mother in law. She tried the same BS while I was married to her son.

  • @dargeo1406
    @dargeo1406 Před rokem +1

    He told me I should quit my jobs and just move in with him-he’d take care of me. I didn’t. Later he mentioned 2 of his side pieces and disappeared with no explanation. I was flabbergasted. Who does that?!! Now I know he’s broken inside and tries to steal everyone’s light. Really diabolical.
    Told me he wanted my soul 🚩, told me I’m only his( but he was cheating), told me he could replace me easily, told me he wanted to marry me BUT also that “ he got tired of the same woman fast”. Told me he didn’t “usually hit women but wanted to hit”me… It’s a long list of red flags that I experienced and swept under the rug for months thinking “maybe he didn’t mean what he said”…
    Thank God I blocked him, but when he recently contacted me I exploded. Had to sign him up for mental help…

  • @warrenbradford2597
    @warrenbradford2597 Před rokem +1

    I have been gaslighted and name-called by my obsessively, controlling narcissistic mother. I have already been corrosively controlled by her. I need let look out for this tactic next time.

  • @forensicbadassprofiling
    @forensicbadassprofiling Před rokem +2

    Thank you so much for bringing these two topics together. Coercive control and parental alienation. Including Grand parental alienation. Jill, you are so helpful and so professional. I'm so grateful for all the years you've gotten me through. Thank you for all you do to help validate what we've gone through.

    • @franksimmons9242
      @franksimmons9242 Před rokem

      Never thought of it in terms of grandparents but my youngest daughter when she was about 12 after I left told me on the phone Grandpa said you left me! She's 30 now no matter how I tried through the years that still damaged her. Very intentional.

  • @sagesufferswell
    @sagesufferswell Před 9 měsíci

    I wish I could share this with everyone. I love you Kevin. Silent bob has his role, but you are so much more. ❤

  • @cindypabst9293
    @cindypabst9293 Před rokem

    My narcissist said if I left, he would hunt me down I did leave with my kids to a battered women's shelter. I was afraid for a long time.

  • @nathansmith6365
    @nathansmith6365 Před rokem +4

    They are criminals!.....oh wow Jill

  • @scarletsummer3526
    @scarletsummer3526 Před rokem +7

    Men like to feign but this happens to them but I can tell you unequivocally this happens to women... women that run a state away with their kids are running from abuse galore!!!
    My father worked and worked and toiled and worked to pit me against my mother..
    Then he got a new wife and she did the same thing and I had to hear about it for years and years and years every time I came over same old regurgitated stories and grievances about my mom tho my dad caused all the shit with his abusive ways and words...
    I never knew I could set boundaries, that wasn't part of pleasing four parents deal... my role according to all of them was to listen to all the junk all their brainwashing of me back and fourth about each other, doing exactly what they say and being perfect.
    Well this last year my father showed his true colors and he ripped me to shreds in horrendous mean snotty abusive horrible Ways. Ripped me to shreds "my character" my being and telling me that I would never find her another man in my divorce. Tho I literally was th best kid who flew right over all my siblings.
    I left him telling him now I understand why my mother left you... Prior I'd never been disrespectful...
    Understand I was always gracious, just listen to them all over the years never judged tried to spread my love out between all 4 as best as I could...
    But now things are completely changed and I do not believe in no-fault divorces any longer...
    If you screw up your family by verbal abuse, you can't keep your s*** together, you are not extending Olive branches of Grace and kindness to your wife and she runs a state away... You don't deserve your family ever.. NOT Even The Kids... You had your shot... Wait until they grow up...
    I actually resent now that the courts gave me back to my father and drug me through much stress!!!.. They had no right to!!!
    My mother ran for good reason from horrible abuse from a man that ripped her dignity to shreds like he did me this last year.
    Never again...
    And I do not believe in second chances because that horrendous abusive behavior always comes around to the kids.. Eventually ...
    A child's nervous system is used up quicker by ass hole abusive parent... So parents check your actual motives and admit your idiot abuses... Because some kids will cut you out when they figure out that you used your kids, teens, good adult children as a pawn and abused their mom so badly.. let alone you abusing her/him finally...
    Some things are just too wrong... And the lawyer, courts etc know nothing... .

    • @markcooper9033
      @markcooper9033 Před rokem

      Much to say about so much hurt...I dont have words to say but a thumbs up to hear...😐👍

    • @saturdayschild8535
      @saturdayschild8535 Před rokem

      Isn’t it horrible? The lies! My dad has been married so many times and lies to each wife about what number in the list they actually are. He makes himself out to be this poor little cheated on good man that works so hard for his family. He hates me because I’ve always known the truth about him. He brought so many mistresses around because I was the child born before he went on his marriage spree.
      He looks good in person and on paper. I tell all the women to run. They never listen the first time, but they keep what I say in the back of their minds.
      Shame I saved them from my dad but didn’t save myself from the covert I ended up with.

  • @chautran2588
    @chautran2588 Před rokem

    One narc parent said to her daughter, you can't go out to work because you're handicapped. You must work at home like a servant or a maid... Fortunately, the daughter keeps working outside the home even though having to jump through hoops.

  • @willj7628
    @willj7628 Před rokem +1

    My ex narc convinced the police I was stalking her coz I kept dropping her belongings off. She caused me to have a mental breakdown my doctor told me to leave her in 2014 I stayed till 2018 within a few months I realised she had been leading a double life or multiple life’s. She’s stole our daughter done the smear campaign got me a criminal record all because I exposed them as a full family of narcs. 🙄 when you have to Google your partners actions it’s time to leave😳 Pure Evil is all I can say! That cohesive behaviour is illegal in uk I’ll ring the police now & report it.

  • @Rumsfeldthe3rd-vj9pv
    @Rumsfeldthe3rd-vj9pv Před rokem +1

    Once someone has finally identified and recognized that they’ve been treated cruelly and unfairly bye there spouse what’s the next step and can I get her to stop! Or what’s up !

  • @davidhinkson8856
    @davidhinkson8856 Před rokem +4

    My ex wife did this to me - the threats, cutting me off from friends and family and trying to restrict my movements - and she also at one stage took my bank card (she and her mother bullied me into handing it over in the car), wasting all the money I was paid and giving me a small amount for bus fare.

  • @alimccreery755
    @alimccreery755 Před rokem

    After I was talked into moving into his house I was told that if I leave he was going to have me dragged back. I’m not married nor am I this person’s girlfriend so I consider this to be a threat. I found out from my brother that he is very supportive of me getting out of this persons house. I’ve had several forms of this tactic.

  • @csh43166
    @csh43166 Před rokem

    Thank you, Jill. I knew there had to be a name for it. While they were also physically @busive, this perfectly describes the non-physical behaviors of my narc father and ex.

  • @youaresoulessence
    @youaresoulessence Před rokem

    I don't have to be religious to understand i can be as gentle as a dove while wise like the serpent.
    Real love is growing sensitivity and also strength in wisdom in sovereignty 💙🦋

  • @vanessamonroe1917
    @vanessamonroe1917 Před rokem +2

    My sister is bullying and coercive toward my elderly father w dementia? What can I do???? She acts charming when the authorities show up. 😳

    • @theenlightenedtarget
      @theenlightenedtarget  Před rokem

      If she is abusing a vulnerable person, possibly record her doing that so you can show it to the authorities. That’s horrible and heartbreaking

  • @ronnie.1983
    @ronnie.1983 Před rokem +2

    She destroyed our marriage,family and life.

  • @GloriaGonzalez-zz4wp
    @GloriaGonzalez-zz4wp Před 9 měsíci

    ❤❤❤❤ thank you for this video you know I grew up in a nursing abuse verbally mentally emotionally you know with you know parents but at the end of the day I'm getting help you know traumatized as a child growing up cuz it wasn't my fault and thank you so much man for this video I appreciate you 🎉

  • @spiritualkings
    @spiritualkings Před 6 měsíci

    It’s worse than I even thought. 👿

  • @m.f.richardson1602
    @m.f.richardson1602 Před rokem

    Thank you
    Peace 💕🇺🇲

  • @kimberlymccracken747
    @kimberlymccracken747 Před rokem +5

    Stark got it right 👍 I often said I felt like Patti Hearst. It was terrible 😔 I used to feel he was in the car with me. Seemed there was a psychic component.
    Spooky 😲
    This person was like the worst of both of my parents - Dad a financial abuser of anyone and everyone. Mother coercively controlling in many other ways.

  • @MentalWellnessWithWaihiga
    @MentalWellnessWithWaihiga Před 11 měsíci

    These are my parents and i live with them

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 Před 4 měsíci

    We are soo lucky to have seriously

  • @rosalynmoyle3766
    @rosalynmoyle3766 Před rokem

    Criminal it is.

  • @user-dd3ny4xb3w
    @user-dd3ny4xb3w Před 6 měsíci

    He would threaten to leave me all the time if I questioned or brought up his past secual indiscretions, threatened to slit my throat if he caught me with another man, threatened to rip apart my home board by board if I was ever unhappy. In 23yrs I remained faithful all the while he cheated relentlessly. 5 mos ago he left me to be with a younger, wealthier woman whom his narc sister bonded with.

  • @terryfbro
    @terryfbro Před rokem +5

    Should children in this situation be shown this video?

    • @christinam.1930
      @christinam.1930 Před rokem +3

      I feel we should definitely educate our children so they are equipped with wisdom on how to take care them selves

  • @sigurdurhalldorsson2775

    Thank you ❤

  • @scarletsummer3526
    @scarletsummer3526 Před rokem

    It is criminal and always comes out in the wash in the end...
    Unfortunately to the detriment of (finally) adult children...(torturous childhood!!!)
    My mom ran from a verbal torturer where her whole being and dignity was being obliterated and degraded..It was run worthy and worth taking a kid out of that shit.
    He finally finished his mission with me as an adult..... Dignity gone... And worse...

  • @vinitawagh3223
    @vinitawagh3223 Před rokem

    Describing my mother ..🙏🙏❤️

  • @annthomson5648
    @annthomson5648 Před rokem +2

    They r vicious criminals

  • @bregjemarieke1434
    @bregjemarieke1434 Před rokem

    ❤ spot on!!!

  • @anniella29
    @anniella29 Před rokem +22

    You’re right. It should be classed as a crime! Several people in my life. You describe what they do so clearly and accurately! I hope these videos might help some people still trapped to find the strength to escape! It’s not easy, but usually possible. And even when you get away from them it takes a long time to get over their brainwashing. Terrible terrible situation. 😢

  • @ramzhouran2152
    @ramzhouran2152 Před rokem

    Thanks!

  • @dharmadeven216
    @dharmadeven216 Před rokem +2

    My ex sent this
    I'm 5'6 Meaning 169 cm If I'm taller than this, people will think I'm a walking Burj Khalifa. Stop carrying your arrogance around in your backside, someone will beat you up. If you are with a girl, concentrate on her and not how the world revolves around. Nonsense, entirely nonsense, you and your worldly concepts of love. Please, I feel bad for whoever will end up with you at some point. You are stuck in the tragic cycle of life and you don't want to get out, and I don't care at all. I'm quiet because you are a little baby and will get hurt. Listen, crazy, stop carrying your brain in your backside, you're not that special or great that you haven't made a mistake and are going around saying it. Karma won't do anything, it will just go inside your backside. Take your nonsense and leave here as soon as possible. Don't fall for yourself too much, you'll die.

    • @jamesrutter4100
      @jamesrutter4100 Před rokem

      Sounds like this guy is anally fixated. He's sick in the head. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE. DO NOT BREED WITH IT OR YOUR CHILDREN WILL BE "HIS PROPERTY".

  • @ND-or5so
    @ND-or5so Před rokem +1

    I paid for talk space and nothing has happened . Its all about the bull when you have to fill out forms amd then you don't get a fowl up. If i paid then they should
    stop making me do all the work to make all the moves. I havent had one session yet and its been months
    They should be calling my ass. I also paid for better help. I'm done.

  • @daydicakes
    @daydicakes Před rokem

    wow

  • @MrJfortheElohim
    @MrJfortheElohim Před rokem

    Hey Jill, do you believe family court contribute to trauma abuse of victims to narcissist abuse? And do they care?

    • @theenlightenedtarget
      @theenlightenedtarget  Před rokem +4

      Yes family court contributes greatly to the trauma a targeted spouse or parent goes through. Family courts are a money making machine, they do not care what’s in the child’s best interest and are willfully ignorant about narcissistic abuse and parental alienation. Legal abuse syndrome is a very real thing.

  • @zestygurl
    @zestygurl Před rokem +1

    Here's the problem with the UK law it's gaslighting as the UK royals hold diplomatic immunity. Which means it doesn't apply equally anyone just like here can buy their way out of so called justice.
    Stalking is awful I'm glad I never got married or had children in this society. The sexism to racism to segregation classism is still very much an issue. A few hold diplomatic immunity therefore they don't face jail or prison what is happening those they are stalking abusing end up there I speak from experience.
    No one can ever claim I'm controlling anyone with money as I have none very little. And I openly just asked for assistance while building a skillset. Sexism is a huge factor we are seen as property less than for paychecks even in 2023 I'm a walking wreck bomb due to that mess just refuse to be a professional victim nor murdered or murder anyone else. No matter what direction all sides in this society is a mess.
    The clothing you are wearing is made by slavery. The device you use to post on is also made by abusive tactics slavery too. Google spent trillions keeping the scamming going especially maleware to Spyware that's very real. Just pointing that out the makeup you use equally toxic talc has asbestos in it and even rice powder has high levels of arsenic so, it's a hot mess all over.
    The money aspect is made up the kids flew on a plane that causes further air pollution to land in an equally toxic environment and dangerous no matter how much money they have on screen or in their pockets been walking targets online and Offline currently in this unsustainable toxic society.
    Just pointing that out. And the geomagnetic energy aspect to wiretapping aspect manipulation through our electrical grid has been tracked the huge negative impact for over 100 years. I worked on cellular towers at 18 years old witnessed issues with incorrectly calibrated towers and the manipulation crappy ways caused many communities we witnessed that first hand it also took a very serious toll on our own bodies physically doing that work. Being female they were sexist awful saw me as less than property which I knew better kept up researching look into all the towers technology wise my way. And I understood the connections especially what was happening through the telephone lines for example electricity earlier in the being watch the movie 'The Snake Pit' these satellite
    S te technology kept getting repeatedly manipulated to continue scams slavery. Gas prices were not correctly calibrated incorrectly coding scamming allowed further issues in medical records continuing debt slavery been horrible a mess, globally.
    Even if you jail or put someone in prison the issues co.e from enforcement regarding that manipulation that's been used I certainly do not hack at all. Entrapment is a problem. Certainly know I'm not putting spyware or maleware on anyone yet, saying making them pay in jail or prison unfortunately in the UK royals hold diplomatic immunity. I've found that America backs terrorism that direction and slavery you are the one left holding the bill held hostage in your own country. Addressing that aspect is very difficult I've endured it here lived through it. Not hugely popular either at the moment with many. I'm OK with that. What one sees as impulsive is more survival just isn't thriving. Aware it's painful to work through.
    That's my experience been a crazy journey. Difficult path to be on. On my end I fully disable comments 20 years + in customer service industry reason for that not sitting here fielding others rage or hatred so, I'm certainly not leaving this comment on your channel to rip at you absolutely not.
    I understand your concern and perspective the frustration. And it would be lovely if that law in the UK applied to UK royals as well it does not. And there is part of the problem. Enforcing such a law even here.

  • @Gyle.3559
    @Gyle.3559 Před rokem

    True. You looking good though

  • @LuciAdeclat-ns8ux
    @LuciAdeclat-ns8ux Před rokem

    How do they know where you are at all times? He shows up wherevr I am going. How does he know?

    • @GhostBlueEternalFlame
      @GhostBlueEternalFlame Před rokem +2

      Apple Air Tag. Have your vehicles checked out.

    • @psychoholiday-ju1cp
      @psychoholiday-ju1cp Před rokem +3

      I've heard people talk about finding GPS devices that were stuck into their cars. My phone has been transparently hacked by my haters of my family of origin even though I live 2300 mi away for decades

    • @psychoholiday-ju1cp
      @psychoholiday-ju1cp Před rokem +2

      @@CONEHEADDK I keep changing phone companies and my phone keeps getting by my younger brother even though we haven't really talked that much in the last few decades... He just had to do his part in a smear campaign for my family of origin

    • @saturdayschild8535
      @saturdayschild8535 Před rokem +1

      Flying monkeys. Possibly neighbors you think are friends. My dad charmed the cashiers at all the stores he picked his medications up from.
      It’s super unsettling to have strangers know who you are and your kids all because a ND told them to look out for you and to report back when he’s around.

    • @BeeBeeBell
      @BeeBeeBell Před rokem

      They have either put a tracking device on your vehicle, or it is on your phone. Both very easily done. Have both checked out.

  • @Polina-ji4fe
    @Polina-ji4fe Před rokem

    This Russian singer "Shaman" (who is pro war publically but not actually) has this erm 'top russian PR manager' (says tons of words about who she is, as russia is most criminal and fascist regime) as his current wife. She is his coersive controller. They've involved me into this as well.

  • @idontknowlloyd
    @idontknowlloyd Před rokem

    perception control

  • @hawk4879
    @hawk4879 Před 8 měsíci

    Well, then they need to ban women being rewarded for divorce by going to Family Court and filing child support on their ex-husband and ruining our lives because my ex-wife said all those things to me and then she went to court and did it. I get to see my son very little who I love very much.

  • @IndigoAngel1448
    @IndigoAngel1448 Před 6 měsíci

    All my life I've been told by the majority of people that I'm a selfish arsehole, I've got a history of abusing animals and I've always been a very sadistic and arogant person, I tend to be controlling in my relationships and I'm selfish financially, I also feel like people stand up to me to prove a point that they are better than me and trying to shame me and put me down and be smug towards me, it's all in my head because it's something I would do and not just in my own defense but freely. I was sexually abused by my step-grandad when I was little and growing up I had a psychologically abusive narcissistic mother and I believe I have both BPD and NPD as a result. I was diagnosed with autism at the age of three and all my life I've had the right support from my family and in my education but I've learned to be selfish and take everyone and everything for granted and expect things and believe I'm the centre of everything and I rarely ever give back in return. And the worst part is that if this was someone else saying this then I would instantly hate them and call them and then most likely have something to say to them like I can never do any wrong and I know I'm exactly the same so I know I'm a massive hypocrite. I'm getting help and psychology soon and I hope I can help myself as much as I need to in becoming a better person.

  • @HzFvr
    @HzFvr Před rokem

    👍👍👍

  • @marcusxsara8896
    @marcusxsara8896 Před rokem

    🙏🏾💜☮️💡

  • @richard-en2dx
    @richard-en2dx Před rokem

    😘🍵🍦

  • @michaelgarrow3239
    @michaelgarrow3239 Před rokem

    Jill- nothing you talk about in these videos is “illegal.”
    🙁

  • @whambamclick1
    @whambamclick1 Před 11 měsíci

    I don't think everything you say in examples are what you conclude. Like the father holding the childs money after getting off the plane. Lots of kids loose money and for someone more responsible to hold a large sum for a child's protection doesn't sound like what you conclude. A dishonest person can come to negative conclusions. It just leaves me scratching my head about other things you say. If everything you see is a nail....