Depersonalization Disorder + Long Covid: Conor's Recovery Story
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- čas přidán 2. 04. 2023
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02:27 How Conor's DPDR Started
06:16 What Depersonalization Means
10:06 "How Is This Possible?"
14:47 Explaining DPDR to Doctors
20:31 Feeling Like There's No Way Out
23:56 Being Unable To Exercise
28:24 Starting To Recover
32:09 Working with a Therapist
37:05 Finding The DP Manual
44:52 Others with the same circumstances
48:37 What Does DPDR Recovery Feel Like?
52:50 Driving with Depersonalization
56:14 Walking in Nature
59:36 Advice for people with DPDR
Conor is an Irishman like myself, who last year endured a serious episode of Depersonalization and Derealization. Conor's DPDR also unfortunately also coincided with a bout of Long Covid, which left him struggling to deal with the mental and physical symptoms of both conditions.
But thankfully, Conor managed to recover completely and he's with us today to talk about his experience with and recovery from Depersonalization Disorder.
Check out my website and DPDR recovery program at:
www.dpmanual.com/
Connect with me!
/ depersonalizationmanual
/ dpmanual
Disclaimer: Please note that the medical information contained within this video is not intended as a substitute for consultation with a professional physician and is not a recommendation of specific therapies
Thanks so much for taking the time to speak with me Shaun and document my experience with DPDR and long Covid. It was fantastic to chat with you and share ideas and I really hope anyone going through DPDR and long Covid can find this helpful. Good luck guys, you can all beat this!
It was a pleasure Conor, thank you so much for sharing your insights and experience! 😊
Hi conor, how long did your recovery process take? Im 17months into long covid, the worst is behind me but still have milder versions of muscle fatigue, sleep issues, and shortness of breath. I feel stuck in this state.
@@wzupppphi there. It really started to fade around January this year, so around 11-12 months in. I feel the nervous system work I have done has really helped. Cold showers and cold water immersion and good sleep are essential. Everyone’s recovery progress seems to be different but many people start to recover between 12-18 months.
@@conorcurran9431 thanks, I felt nearly recovered back in november but then I took the booster and it set me back unfortunately. Those cold showers do really help ive noticed but I gotta stay longer in it. Thanks for your recovery story😊
When did you notice your visual symptoms started to fade and you felt like every thing started to look normal
I’ve been struggling for 23 months. And seem I’ve gotten worse. I had a neuropsych exam and my IQ and scores were extremely low. They don’t match my past accomplishments. It’s very frightening. I wake up and go to bed unsure of what’s going to bring tomorrow and new symptoms. It feels like brain damage, especially after hearing my test scores.
I don’t understand how everything about you and what you once knew could be wiped from you. How you felt, did things, liked, acted, taught, slept, dislikes, drank, laid on the couch, walked, shopped, internally. I mean everything in every aspect. Eveything is gone.
How are you doing now?
Updates?
Thank you for this interview! These are so incredibly helpful. Love all of the different perspectives. Shaun, you’re so kind and empathetic, we are all entirely grateful for you. Got bless you sir 🙏🏻
Glad you enjoyed it Katy and thank you for the kind words! 😊
Wow this video helped my anxiety a lot and really made me feel not alone. I feel blessed to have found your channel Shaun. Thank you so much.
Happy to help! 😊
Thank you for your courage to share your experience.
Completely relate 100 percent
😊😊
Oooh I’m so excited to listen to this I haven’t met anyone with long covid and dpdr together !!!
Hope you enjoy it Bee, let us know what you think! 😊
You described exactly what im going through. its the trees for me too! Thank you for sharing.
Glad it was helpful Justine! 😊
Thankyou both of you. i dont know where to begin, this has helped me so much to understand what happened to me. i got covid in june last year and after about 1 week noticed all these symptoms, along with memory loss, like when reading i couldnt follow a story line or the tv plot. i was so scared, sleep deprived and unfortunately through me not being able to describe things clearly enough (and some overzealous private doctors haha) was given an antipsychotic 'quetiapine' that only made things much worse. within the space of a week i also developed face distortions and was wondering whether this was reported with dpdr somewhere? mri showed nothing - like when i look at people their face looks 'off' with the eyes in odd directions, makes ppl look a quite alien. this is ongoing now 13 months but thankfully most of the other dpdr symptoms have subsided. but the landscape and outside still looks 'bigger' - im now just terrified of getting covid again and it doing something else, but ironically i wonder whether that fear is making things drag on with my symptoms. still, i went out in town for the first time today since October last year so finally pushing back. im currently involved with a research group in Dartmouth on the face distortions, and they have come to the conclusion that i have prosopometamorphopsia - the cause is unknown as only 73 or so cases have ever been reported ( for various reasons ) gunshot wound, lesion, or nothing at all so its quite a mysterious condition. and i was wondering on your angle as far as dpdr causing that? as i have and have had loads of the other symptoms along side it. especially the tree one! haha the bark just looks so 3d HD and computer like. anyway thankyou again i can hardly put into words what finding this video means to me and the work you are doing .🙏
Everything Conor describes in this video is exactly my experience right now. Things look so strange 24/7, especially trees. I got covid in Nov 2021, and ever since my taste and smell has been distorted. Around Oct 2023, I started getting faint dpdr, not too noticable. Then in Jan 2024, it hit full force, intense 24/7 dpdr. It still hasn't gotten better
So nice to see another Irish person get interviewed (Munster native, here!) I have been getting tons of breaks from the DPDR but then it comes back/the breaks never stay away. Do the breaks get longer? I still sometimes get hit with it like a WHOOSH really badly, even in my own kitchen 😭
Also wow, Conor found a therapist who KNEW what DPDR was 🎉😲 A lot of therapists I spoke to only know of it as a transient experiences.
Thanks Kirsten! 😊 Munster native too, torn between Cork + Kerry 😉
And yes, as you recover, the times in which you're not experiencing DPDR get longer, and the tendency to drift to panicky thoughts gets less and less. Read this, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-does-depersonalization-recovery-feel-like/
@@Dpmanual Ahaha, I could hear some Cork in your accent no doubt!! Some people have neutral accents, but there is a very subtle Cork twang there. I'm back and forth between Limerick and Cork myself!
And I am between stages 2 and 4, which is a very relieving read! I can't quite forget about it, but I have stopped reacting as emotionally to the dpdr! (Before when it got bad, I'd be reduced to a puddle of tears but now it sorta feels like "uggggghhhh again???")
@@kirstencorbett2289 Ya the Cork lilt has definitely crept in! 😊 And yes exactly, DPDR goes from being frightening to being an annoyance, to forgetting about it completely over time 😊 Keep up the good work Kirsten and if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.
Hey Kirsten, great to see another Irish commenter. I can assure you the breaks get longer and longer and the flares get less and less. It just takes time, no quick fixes unfortunately. But the fact you are having breaks mean you’re well on your way to recovery! Best of luck!
I love the work you do Shaun, I've spread the word about the DP Manual Its helped me and others. I'm still in recovery. But I hope one day to be on your show. I have one hell of a story. hehe
Thanks Mike, I'm so glad you've found the material useful! 😊 And yes absolutely, would love to feature your recovery story on the channel some day soon! 😊
you recover yet?
The uniformity of experience is amazing. I can really relate to the stuff about after images. I still remember how the sight of the louvre blinds in my doctor's surgery was printed on my consciousness for the rest of the day after I saw him. That was in 2004 when I was 18. I'm now almost 38 and living mostly symptom free. I still get a fleeting sense of unreality from time to time, especially when sleep deprived, but now that I'm able to identify it it doesn't go beyond that. It's amazing what time and understanding can do. I get it though - while you're going through it, you cannot even bare to think it might last another 2 seconds. However, once that 2 seonds is up, you realize you did get through it (I know that's a bit simplistic, but it's the way I like to look at it in times of heightened stress). So hang in there. It does get easier with time xxx
Thanks for your comment David and yes absolutely, the uniformity across the symptoms / experiences always amazes me. The symptoms can feel so bizarre, but I feel that if people knew just how common they were they wouldn't be nearly as unsettling! Anyways, I'm very glad to hear you're doing so well, keep up the good work! 😊
@@Dpmanual Thanks heaps!! You keep up the good work too. These interviews are incredible.
@@Davotheledge Glad to hear you're enjoying the interviews David! -- and stay tuned, there's more on the way 😊
@@Dpmanual Absolutely will. And by the way Shaun (I know this if off-topic) but have you been making appearances in Australian ads by any chance? A mitsubishi motors ad? I was at my dentist a few weeks agop, and I could swear I saw your face pop up on the TV!
@@Davotheledge Not as far as I know 😂 But if you can get a screenshot of that and send it on I'd really appreciate it!
Hey Shaun, thank you for all you do!
I was wondering if you've heard of people having DP without visual distortions?
Hi Chad! 😊 Yes absolutely -- Remember that DPDR, like all anxiety-based conditions, is a spectrum of symptoms, and people's experience of them can vary: www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/
Yah dude we went through the same thing with the long covid CFS thing.
Im currently in the same boat and what is reallg helping atm are these things. I quit all drugs. Early sleep, cold showers and meditation. I take walks everyday. The most annoying issue im having is shaky vision effects and sensory overload. Cant concentrate so well and watching screens is hard because of the movements being registered late. Also i get after images at times. I do believe i can get better and will keep doing breathing techniques from wim hof. What i also heard my dokter said was that covid can really cause this kind of thing. There is loads of evidence that this virus can do so. Bless everyone and peace. We can do this! ❤
Thanks for your comment and for your helpful suggestions! 😊 And don’t worry, visual symptoms like that are super common with DPDR and will fade away and stop as you recover: www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-affect-vision/
@@Dpmanual thank you !
I'm living in this right now!!! 😢 It's been 2.5yrs and I wait for healing.
Mine started with a terrible head cold. I don't know if it was covid cause I didn't get tested. I was suicidal but knew I didn't want to be in an institution or put my family through such a horrible thing. Do you have physical symptoms. I do..Mine kicked off with a terrible panic attack and ER visit. Labeled as anxiety. Been to multiple ER visits. So many terrible physical sensation. In my face, legs, arms, always can feel heart beat..God help us that are suffering. Any ideas for rapid healing I would greatly appreciate it. I wake up in the every day. God bless and heal all those suffering in this altered state.
Thank you so much guys!
Hey Jacob, thanks for your comment and I'm sorry to hear you've been having a difficult time. I know DPDR can be scary but just remember that it’s a natural reaction to stress and anxiety, and people experience it all the time. The National Institute on Mental Illness estimates that up to 75% of people experience at least one depersonalization / derealization episode in their lives. It's part of your brain's natural defence mechanism and usually it only lasts a few seconds or minutes at a time. It's only when it's focused on as a separate problem (feeling like you're going crazy / in a dream etc) that it can turn into a feedback loop with the anxiety that caused it in the first place. But no matter what caused it or how long you've had it, you can always switch it off completely by stopping that anxious feedback loop. Make sure to carefully read through all the articles and info on my website at www.dpmanual.com and my book The Depersonalization Manual.
And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR 👍
Wow 😢 we have the same experience. Mine started the same January 2022 I got COVID and had an anxiety attack at night when I was about to go to bed and I started to feel disconnected the next day but prior to that I was already feeling anxious I was putting my body through so much meaning lack of sleep over drinking with friends not eating right I felt anxious when I was hungover almost like my body was telling me to slow down and covid was like the last straw and anxiety was over the roof after that :( I always thought that COVID changed my brain or damaged my brain but I feel so disconnected and just super sad sometimes 😢
Don't worry Laura, it doesn't matter what caused it, how long it’s lasted, or whether it’s been 24/7 or episodic, you can always switch DPDR off completely by stopping the anxiety that's causing it 😊 Read this carefully: www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-causes-depersonalization-disorder/
If you are over CV look up a supplement called PhosChol… it is neuroprotective and helpful for a host of brain related things. Also, NAC and B-Complex is helpful together as well!
I’m not a doctor this is just from my personal experience. 🤍🙏
Hey! Mine started in Junuary 2022 too ! After I got Covid for the first time. I started my recovery journey the June 1st 2023 and now it wayyyy more easier to deal with and now I can go comfortably in a mall or a supermarket. It feels good but I still feel not completely normal/fully recovered but I guess I need more time :)
@@ShandaMichelle1 how long did it take you to recover from DPDR :/
@@AurelJ0 what things have you done to start your recovery
I got dpdr after hsv1 infection. I am still dealing with it. Therapy and medication is helping a bit with anxiety but the vision issue and brain fog is debilitating.
I would highly recommend looking at your nervous system and vagus nerve. Many bacterial and viral infections cause nervous system dysfunction that causes DPDR and vision issues. It’s all downstream. Vision is processed in the Central Nervous System. Cold showers, meditation, sauna, cardio exercise have all helped mine massively.
@@conorcurran9431 bro plz plz help me I m dying with this dpdr I m in dream since 17 months I have problems in smell brain gog vision issue extremely memory problems with it and the most I have don’t have any feelings with even with my gf !!! Nervous issue experience as well coz I can feel and hear my nick and my nick pain all the time , plz give me some good tips I am tired now
@@conorcurran9431 I think you are right. I also had vertigo for a week which went away with medication. I just hope this feeling of dpdr goes away soon.
Anyway thanks for your message and
congratulations on your recovery 💕
I don’t feel that anxious anymore about dp/dr. But I still feel it, not that bad as first but it is there. My question is why if it is a sympton of anxiety I still feel it when I ignore it and feel calm in my body. You said that from time to time it is just annoying and not anxious anymore but I don’t understand because how is it a symptom of anxiety then?
Don't worry, that's a very common experience. Read this carefully, I think you'll find it very helpful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-without-anxiety/
@@Dpmanual wow thanks I understand it now. I thought I had a different experience or something but it’s just normal😅
@@Luna-of1uy Happy to help 😊
@@Dpmanual does taking medication for anxiety/ depression help with DP? Or should someone still dealing and trying to recover from DP STAY away from any sort of meds?
@@MoiiBanks I'm not a medical professional so can't give you specific recommendations re medication. But please read this article, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/can-medication-cure-depersonalization/
I LOVE YOU CONNOR , JUST ANXİETY SEMPHTOM ! B12 , MAGNESİUM VERY İMPORTANT !
does taking medication for anxiety/ depression help with DP? Or should someone still dealing and trying to recover from DP STAY away from any sort of meds?
I'm not a medical professional so can't give you specific recommendations re medication. But please read this article, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/can-medication-cure-depersonalization/
my vision is so strabge, when i see anything my head dont see this why
Does this channel talk about people who have dpdr from things other than anxiety?
Read this, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-causes-depersonalization-disorder/
@@Dpmanual do u ever answer questions? This the 4th time u ignored me.
All my symptoms are gone except blurry vision and distortion will they fade away as i recover?
Don’t worry, visual symptoms like that are super common with DPDR and will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-affect-vision/
Is it normal that you feel like your not yourself but a different person? Like I am changed of not me anymore but another personality. I’m so aware of myself that it freaks me out but idk if this is also a symptom?
Don’t worry, symptoms like that are super common with DPDR and will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/
@@Dpmanual thankyou
@@emmahoef6858 Happy to help 😊
I feel like a different person. I don’t understand how everything about you and what you once knew could be wiped from you. How you felt, did things, liked, acted, taught, slept, dislikes, drank, laid on the couch, walked, shopped, internally. I mean everything in every aspect. Eveything is gone.
How do you get over it. .
What causes it
Read this, I think you'll find it useful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-causes-depersonalization-disorder/
❤
😊😊
Whats helps with the bad anxiety, and panic?
Hi Jesse, head over to my website at www.dpmanual.com, there’s tons of info and tips on anxiety / DPDR recovery there 😊
I am in recovery☺️
Glad to hear it! 😊👍
May I ask something. Currently I have high levels of anxiety regarding visual symptoms. The top of the list are afterimages and fuzzy vision (almost like visual snow, but it's not that).
Are these things common with dp/dr?
It my main concern, so it would help me immensely to get some input.
Thanks guys,
Johan
Don’t worry Johan, visual symptoms like that are super common with DPDR and will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-affect-vision/
Wow i never heard this before! Cure of long covid
Glad it was helpful 😊
After covid infection I see differently, everything is too sharp and colorful, daily headaches, skin hives etc.. I feel like I ate some magic mushrooms but its 24/7 for 3 months. But I don't feel like anything is unreal. But I don't feel normal at all. I have altered perception. I guess this is not DPDR?
Thanks for your comment 😊 From what you've described that does sound like DPDR to me, but please take a look through the list of symptoms here, see if they sound familiar: www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/
Thanks so much to Conor for sharing his inspirational story with the channel!👏And you can learn more about my book The DP Manual here 👉👉👉 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/
I'm in an odd paradox where DPDR has made me doubt the existence of others so much so I find it harder to empathise/take lessons from others, even though these people are decribing things I identify with.
@@joshuataylor3550 Don’t worry Joshua, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR 😊 I know they can be frightening but they will fade away and stop as your recovery continues:
www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/
And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.
Are you forever traumatized by having DPDR even after you recover ?
No. Remember that DPDR is your body and brain's protective mechanism and cannot hurt you, and therefore cannot traumatize you. In the same way that a panic attack can feel terrifying and traumatizing, once it passes you can and will get 100% back to normal 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/back-to-normal-after-depersonalization/