These Tips Will Help You Address Toxic Relationships Within Your Family
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- čas přidán 25. 08. 2022
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In this highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show, Deanna is trying to insulate herself from a toxic extended family member. We can love a family member dearly and at the same time realize that we aren’t going to have a great relationship with them. How can Deanna protect herself, grieve the relationship and heal the wounds that have come from it? Dr. Cloud shares ideas for how to address this toxic relationship, both with herself and with the grandparent that’s behind it. We can get to a place where we do not excuse or enable bad behavior but simply chose to name it for what it is, yet not remove our love from the person as a result. - Zábava
Rejection Is God's Protection Thank You Lord 🙏
Timestamp 8:05 "You're not excusing anything. You're not enabling. You're naming it. '*That's* bad behavior. That's Toxic. That's NOT good At All. That's BAD ...and I'm going to love you.'"
👏👏♥
It sounds very compassionate but you can not do all the work and can not allow yourself to continue to get hurt. As an adult in my 40’s I am having to learn this lesson. Sometimes it is best to let go. Not bc your mad bc it’s what will make for long lasting peace.❤
Thank you Doctor Cloud so grateful God has used you in my life to help set boundaries hallelujah hallelujah Jesus Christ hallelujah 🙌🏻Setting boundaries are life saving for the mind, heart and soul hallelujah 🙌🏻
When you've had enough you'll know you've had enough and then you just walk away and say see you take your toxicity with you don't have time bye-bye now
I like your energy Dr Cloud!
Father forgive them for they don't know what they are doing.
YeeeEEP ! ForGIVE .....then............. F L E E !?!?!?!?!?!
@@suzesinger6762 I wouldn't say flee after forgiving but setting boundaries. Because trust has to be build. But it is important that they know your boundaries.
No, it sounds like this grandma knows exactly what she's doing. It's just that as they get older their filters slip more quickly
This is just another way to separate and isolate the family. Weve raised a generation, too entitled, selfish and apathetic to work on relationships. And shrinks and clergy are reinforcing this emotionally crippling behavior.
Here are some examples of great character to learn to get to a place of forgiveness; czcams.com/video/Heqn2cy5emI/video.htmlsi=OCnlksj97mIM4-Jz
Thank you for that. I'm following you quit some time and I love the way you put things. In this one and many others. The first one I really liked and that gave me an other perspective was the one about forgiveness.
How could I get into a call with you. I would love to have your wisdom on a inheritance issue which of course has underlying emotional wounds. ❤️
this stuff is hard but good and true
good ✅
There is 'sad and woundedness'. TWICE ....I was wounded..worse than the FIRST time. I am ... ' weaned off ' SAD !?!? ;))
Celebrate recovery is very broken. Been to two. Not impressed. Being I'm a born again recovered alcoholic and addict. Wouldn't send anyone to one of those meetings.
999-trillion oceans of grief -
999-trillion oceans of rage -
999-trillion endless PTSD flashbacks -
I CAN NO LONGER BEAR THIS TORTURE
I'm dying on the inside
he raped my soul.
he gave me SEVERE PTSD.
SEVERE SEVERE SEVERE!!!
and now he's gone.
I blocked him.
I want to die.
how and when will I ever heal from the PTSD flashbacks?
nothing more horrific and debilitating and paralyzing
than the PTSD flashbacks.
the man I revered as my best friend,
betrayed and abandoned me,
and discarded me like garbage,
and replaced me with another.
this happened at the start of last year (2023),
we're now in 2024,
and I'm nowhere near healed.
I want to die.
I can no longer tolerate the pain.
the emotional pain is hell.
I hate my life.
I am tortured
and tormented
with every breath I take.
RAGE
RAGE
RAGE
I want to die
I want to die
I want to die
I can no longer bear the darkness
it consumes me;
suffocates me
I am drowning
oceans of tears
the man I revered as my best friend,
he raped me,
replaced me,
discarded me like last week's garbage...
ultimate betrayal!!
this grief and loneliness...
they rape me;
torture me;
on a soul level
my only prayer is for death
I'm in hell and I can't find escape
God has forsaken me
my whole life I've been tortured, bullied, abused, raped
all I do is suffer
my life is hell
SO NOW, IN HOPES TO HEAL,
AND TO CHANGE MY LIFE AROUND,
I LIVE BY THIS MODUS OPERANDI:
When there’s a disagreement,
when I need to say YES
or when I need to say NO,
when I need to state my needs,
and ask for them to be met...
When I need to create boundaries...
There's a possibility and a probability,
that someone will inevitably,
most likely,
be disappointed in me...
So I engage in every encounter,
interaction, and relationship...
In a way that ensures,
that the person disappointed in me...
NEVER
ends up being me!
I aim to never repress,
never suppress.
I aim to never lose a part of myself.
Radical honesty only:
100% of the time.
Always,
all ways.
AND IN THE FUTURE,
I WILL REMEMBER,
THESE ARE GREEN FLAGS:
1. They have a pattern of taking their own and other's feelings seriously
2. The sharing they're doing is appropriate to the context of the relationship
3. They've been receptive to small vulnerabilities in the past
4. The vulnerability balance between the two of you is roughly equal
5. They are aware of how their vulnerability may impact you
6. They have a history of being firm and kind in asserting their boundaries
7. They are aware of their boundaries and are able to reinforce them in real time
8. They tell you that they are open to you sharing with them (and they mean it!)
9. They have a self-care plan in place