As a child of this situation all I can say is that parents need to leave it up to the children as to whether or not the new spouse is included in family functions. My father attempted to bring this girl into our lives and celebration's which only resulted in the complete and total loss of any respect I may have had for him. Honestly he just disgusts me. Imo step parents should be illegal. No teenage girl or boy wants tp smile and be nice to their fathers girlfriend who is only 4 years older than their own children! He is nothing more than an embarrassment.
Fmr-wife here, and I'm the one that fmr-husband & wife #2 are working hard to alienate the kids from. So, I agree, don't alienate your kids from their other parent. It's harmful to the kids and just makes you look bitter and twisted. I'm guessing it's weird to have wife#2 be the insecure psycho and not the first wife. I miss my kids.
Yes this maybe the case for a lot of wives who are toxic and bitter but not for all. There are Mother's who are genuinely broken for the fact that the new wife isnt someone who's with their husband AFTER the break down of a marriage. Some woman have to come to the terms with the new wife being a big reason for the breakdown of a marriage. It will take time and a lot of soul searching which sometimes they are not given the space to do so before the new wife pushes herself into the kives of the children and is the one trying to poison the children with slurs and lies. I had a family member go through years of betrayal caused through not only her husband but her best friend.
That’s a HARD HARD situation. Also, they’d exactly what happened to me. My husband cheated multiple times, and left me for another woman that he was dating while we were married. It doesn’t matter. By hating her I was destroying my children. I’ll do another guide and address that situation. It’s hard. It’s painful. But it doesn’t negate the need to be kind.
I was going to say the same thing. But you described it way better than I could. It works both ways. Yes the ex wife needs to appreciate what she does for the kids but she needs to also respect boundaries and understand the ex wife's perspective as well.
@@lifetaketwo7662 I'm not saying to be mean or nasty (my family member handled it with more grace than I could have) I'm saying that those particular new wives need to step back, realise that they were part of the cause of a major family break up, and give the wife time to process the whole betrayal instead of insisting that they are untitled to be at functions, insisting that the children should see them as a mother figure, etc
@@jewelscakes8157 disagree on the giving space, as the betrayed ex wife myself. I felt that way too. But it was hurting my kids. They grow up fats and don’t have time to wait for me to process. I worked myself out with my theorist and my friends so I could fake it for my kids.
@@lifetaketwo7662your entire channel is a whole contradiction 🥴 how come you didn’t get any alimony if your husband is a millionaire and according to you have to live in the car?! But now you’re hyping up side chics and so many more obvious contradictions your entire histrionic channel is a complete scam. As fake and fraudulent as it gets
Be realistic about this. A man who married a woman a few years older than his children can’t expect his kids to treat her like a parent. Kids need time to adjust to new living situations. A man who does this should apologize to his children because his choices hurt them too.
It's absolutely pathetic that anyone would feel this way. The relationship is over and you are no longer entitled to an opinion on the other person. Nor say in how their house us run.
I mean, the only time I have seen this kind of behavior is when the new wife is the reason the previous marriage broke down. I agree, it’s wrong to alienate your kids from their parent or stepparent, but this bitterness usually doesn’t come from nowhere towards the new wife.
I’m divorced and my ex is remarried. We had no kids together and he’s in another country. We’re free of all ties and I thank God for all that. But you speak wise words and have a gracious attitude. I can imagine the mom/step mom dynamic can be complicated.
I agree 100%. I've always been nice to my ex husbands new wife. On her birthday I gave her a present and in the card I thanked her for loving and looking after our children when they are with them. It meant alot to her. If she was awful to our kids it would be a different story, but she loves them and cares for them and that's all that matters to me.
I worry about her because I know him. I tell my kids all the time I’m so glad they have her and I mean it. He treats the kids so much better when she’s around.
Hopefully women will teach their children better than they were taught…so they can make good decisions on finding a mate and avoid the destruction of divorce so it doesn’t consume others like it has this lady.
Respect goes both ways. If I divorced my spouse to marry someone else, I would expect my husband to be very hurt by my actions. I would ask my ex husband and my child if they were OK if I bring my new spouse to family events. If they were not OK with it, then my new spouse could not come. If I were the one dumped for someone else, I would not be able to attend some family events if my ex was there with his new wife.
Let me explain that to you, hun. The ex-wife (or kid for that matter) did't invite you into her life so she doesn't owe you a thing 🙂 I was the the kid in this new wifey situation, know what it did to me and my mom, so please leave the old family alone and go live *YOUR* life, ok?
When it come to divorce, the only thing that matters is making life stable for the kids…..as an adult you have to big the big person in the situation! Your relationship has ended with the other person…..but the kids relationship with them hasn’t, so why make it hard for them too! 🤷🏻♂️
Daaaaaaang..... Someone brought the heat and came to play. Absolutely right on all accounts. Well said. Women who take out their stuff on the woman their exhusband is with are despicable. I would say visa versa is true too. Being a jerk to your exwife's new husband is not cool either. Besides that's a future member of the support group so you might as well make friends now while they're together because eventually he'll be another ex.
I assume that you’re the stepmom figure that drove your boyfriend’s kid 20 hours to the volleyball game? All these adult relationships with strangers actually do not serve the kids. Unless you’re a child of divorce yourself, I’d tread carefully here.
I know you will eventually block me, but before you do, listen to this. You will never find peace or change your life until you look at yourself and make changes.
This is why i love my culture. Latino kids would never allow anyone to parent them or do anything like that for them, were loyal to our parents regardless
@@lifetaketwo7662 in your culture… But in mine, its normal and respected .It would be toxic, to the entire family, for a child to allow an outsider to parent them or even speak a word positive or negative about their parent. Honor thy mother and father. But nobody has problems with this, if they’re separate , the new ppl know there place and don’t try to cross boundaries because that would cause dangerous consequences and we know and don’t want to parent other ppls children, to me that looks insecure. Only way we’re parenting them is if they’re abandoned . but I understand that’s normal for your culture and it’s interesting that you feel wronged. And that ppl support your feelings on this, I’d tell my sister to stop the inappropriate victim drama 💩 and focus on her life n her man before she loses it cus Latino men would leave you for that behavior. Different worlds but I can’t wait for a fake Latina or anti culture Latina to reply n disagree. lol 😂 I probably shouldn’t share our culture or norms because you’ll claim we’re abusive or horrible ppl like you have already that why ppl don’t share
Don't take your pain out on the next generation. Insulate them from it. The poor next generation will be broken or have to fix the things you broke. Sadly, I am the fixer. I promised my wife at marriage that the BS stops here and now. Now, Given the benefit of hind sight, I was only mostly successful. With my grandkids I will be 100 percent successful. Positivity and teamwork all around. My wife trusted a mostly broken man. 32 years later the fight is almost won. start now. Your posterity and society will thank you. Words given with love. 😄
As a child of this situation all I can say is that parents need to leave it up to the children as to whether or not the new spouse is included in family functions. My father attempted to bring this girl into our lives and celebration's which only resulted in the complete and total loss of any respect I may have had for him. Honestly he just disgusts me. Imo step parents should be illegal. No teenage girl or boy wants tp smile and be nice to their fathers girlfriend who is only 4 years older than their own children! He is nothing more than an embarrassment.
Fmr-wife here, and I'm the one that fmr-husband & wife #2 are working hard to alienate the kids from.
So, I agree, don't alienate your kids from their other parent.
It's harmful to the kids and just makes you look bitter and twisted.
I'm guessing it's weird to have wife#2 be the insecure psycho and not the first wife.
I miss my kids.
Yes this maybe the case for a lot of wives who are toxic and bitter but not for all. There are Mother's who are genuinely broken for the fact that the new wife isnt someone who's with their husband AFTER the break down of a marriage. Some woman have to come to the terms with the new wife being a big reason for the breakdown of a marriage. It will take time and a lot of soul searching which sometimes they are not given the space to do so before the new wife pushes herself into the kives of the children and is the one trying to poison the children with slurs and lies. I had a family member go through years of betrayal caused through not only her husband but her best friend.
That’s a HARD HARD situation. Also, they’d exactly what happened to me. My husband cheated multiple times, and left me for another woman that he was dating while we were married. It doesn’t matter. By hating her I was destroying my children. I’ll do another guide and address that situation. It’s hard. It’s painful. But it doesn’t negate the need to be kind.
I was going to say the same thing. But you described it way better than I could. It works both ways. Yes the ex wife needs to appreciate what she does for the kids but she needs to also respect boundaries and understand the ex wife's perspective as well.
@@lifetaketwo7662 I'm not saying to be mean or nasty (my family member handled it with more grace than I could have) I'm saying that those particular new wives need to step back, realise that they were part of the cause of a major family break up, and give the wife time to process the whole betrayal instead of insisting that they are untitled to be at functions, insisting that the children should see them as a mother figure, etc
@@jewelscakes8157 disagree on the giving space, as the betrayed ex wife myself. I felt that way too. But it was hurting my kids. They grow up fats and don’t have time to wait for me to process. I worked myself out with my theorist and my friends so I could fake it for my kids.
@@lifetaketwo7662your entire channel is a whole contradiction 🥴 how come you didn’t get any alimony if your husband is a millionaire and according to you have to live in the car?! But now you’re hyping up side chics and so many more obvious contradictions your entire histrionic channel is a complete scam. As fake and fraudulent as it gets
Be realistic about this. A man who married a woman a few years older than his children can’t expect his kids to treat her like a parent. Kids need time to adjust to new living situations. A man who does this should apologize to his children because his choices hurt them too.
It's absolutely pathetic that anyone would feel this way. The relationship is over and you are no longer entitled to an opinion on the other person. Nor say in how their house us run.
I mean, the only time I have seen this kind of behavior is when the new wife is the reason the previous marriage broke down. I agree, it’s wrong to alienate your kids from their parent or stepparent, but this bitterness usually doesn’t come from nowhere towards the new wife.
I disagree. I am in blended family support groups and see it constantly.
I’m divorced and my ex is remarried. We had no kids together and he’s in another country. We’re free of all ties and I thank God for all that. But you speak wise words and have a gracious attitude. I can imagine the mom/step mom dynamic can be complicated.
I agree 100%. I've always been nice to my ex husbands new wife. On her birthday I gave her a present and in the card I thanked her for loving and looking after our children when they are with them. It meant alot to her.
If she was awful to our kids it would be a different story, but she loves them and cares for them and that's all that matters to me.
The kids grow up they will see who is the problem!!!!
A family member is dealing with this same bs
I worry about her because I know him. I tell my kids all the time I’m so glad they have her and I mean it. He treats the kids so much better when she’s around.
Hopefully women will teach their children better than they were taught…so they can make good decisions on finding a mate and avoid the destruction of divorce so it doesn’t consume others like it has this lady.
She is definitely the step mom😂😂😂😂😂
+1
And obviously entitled one 🙄
Respect goes both ways. If I divorced my spouse to marry someone else, I would expect my husband to be very hurt by my actions. I would ask my ex husband and my child if they were OK if I bring my new spouse to family events. If they were not OK with it, then my new spouse could not come.
If I were the one dumped for someone else, I would not be able to attend some family events if my ex was there with his new wife.
Let me explain that to you, hun. The ex-wife (or kid for that matter) did't invite you into her life so she doesn't owe you a thing 🙂
I was the the kid in this new wifey situation, know what it did to me and my mom, so please leave the old family alone and go live *YOUR* life, ok?
You're right. In certain circumstances the children are forced into a relationship that they don't have any time to process themselves.
When it come to divorce, the only thing that matters is making life stable for the kids…..as an adult you have to big the big person in the situation! Your relationship has ended with the other person…..but the kids relationship with them hasn’t, so why make it hard for them too! 🤷🏻♂️
Bottom line this is not a one size fits all situation. Oftentimes both sides are at fault.
Daaaaaaang..... Someone brought the heat and came to play. Absolutely right on all accounts. Well said. Women who take out their stuff on the woman their exhusband is with are despicable.
I would say visa versa is true too. Being a jerk to your exwife's new husband is not cool either. Besides that's a future member of the support group so you might as well make friends now while they're together because eventually he'll be another ex.
Great points!
I assume that you’re the stepmom figure that drove your boyfriend’s kid 20 hours to the volleyball game? All these adult relationships with strangers actually do not serve the kids. Unless you’re a child of divorce yourself, I’d tread carefully here.
👏👏👏👏
This is Robin Schafer
Amen!
I know you will eventually block me, but before you do, listen to this. You will never find peace or change your life until you look at yourself and make changes.
Facts
This is why i love my culture. Latino kids would never allow anyone to parent them or do anything like that for them, were loyal to our parents regardless
That's pretty horrible actually
@terseandtiny1746 that's pretty entitled of you to call our culture horrible... but not surprising...
That’s very problematic. Very. Respectfully, that’s toxic.
@@lifetaketwo7662 in your culture… But in mine, its normal and respected .It would be toxic, to the entire family, for a child to allow an outsider to parent them or even speak a word positive or negative about their parent. Honor thy mother and father.
But nobody has problems with this, if they’re separate , the new ppl know there place and don’t try to cross boundaries because that would cause dangerous consequences and we know and don’t want to parent other ppls children, to me that looks insecure. Only way we’re parenting them is if they’re abandoned . but I understand that’s normal for your culture and it’s interesting that you feel wronged. And that ppl support your feelings on this, I’d tell my sister to stop the inappropriate victim drama 💩 and focus on her life n her man before she loses it cus Latino men would leave you for that behavior. Different worlds but I can’t wait for a fake Latina or anti culture Latina to reply n disagree. lol 😂 I probably shouldn’t share our culture or norms because you’ll claim we’re abusive or horrible ppl like you have already that why ppl don’t share
I’m Latin and I do not co-sign this toxic comment. This is exactly why we raise poor quality men and women.
Don't take your pain out on the next generation. Insulate them from it. The poor next generation will be broken or have to fix the things you broke. Sadly, I am the fixer. I promised my wife at marriage that the BS stops here and now. Now, Given the benefit of hind sight, I was only mostly successful. With my grandkids I will be 100 percent successful. Positivity and teamwork all around. My wife trusted a mostly broken man.
32 years later the fight is almost won. start now. Your posterity and society will thank you. Words given with love.
😄
Great video but very annoying and bad editing.
Umm..kind of hypocritical of you. You trash your ex on several videos. You can’t claim the moral high ground here.