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Dr. Allan Schore on therapeutic alliance and emotional communication, right brain to right brain
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- čas přidán 12. 05. 2014
- Dr. Allan Schore describes the therapeutic alliance as a bond of emotional communication, right brain to right brain.
Thank you so much. People talk about the difficulty of teenagers, or adolescents. But if there’s this massive reorganization and exquisite sensitivity, isn’t The failure of the young person to adapt, because all along no one was really there for the child? This seems to be the elephant in the room. I never hear it addressed, that people spend years preparing for their careers, but they spend zero time on what is supposedly the hardest job in the world, parenting. People think they can come home from working hard doing an eight hour job, and then, when they’re exhausted and burned out, they’re going to tackle the hardest job there is? That’s not possible. So children are abandoned, but they think that it’s normal. No one beat me, there’s no rape, so I must be OK, so it must be me. Now they’ve got a label, they’re a needy borderline, or something else, and they need drugs. Really? What a great substitute for parenting. Parenting is a tremendous amount of work. It’s not an entitlement to be a parent like people think. What we have are people with arrested development in most humans, who decide to fill the hole that left in their soul, with having kids. It’s a disaster. I’m glad there are psychiatrists like this Dr. Allan Shore, but what’s the solution? At this point I don’t think people should have kids until they’re prepared for the job. That means they have cleared their own trauma they’re embodied they’re mature and they’re sane. We don’t need more dysfunctional people. This is already a culture of many severely damaged, grown, wounded children. How bad does it have to get? We’re destroying the very planet.
There is a lot more to what Im going to say, but you see the fallout on all of the news, the politicians, and all of the loud people calling each other names just bc they disagree. Literally when people are that activated they are in their brain stems/central nervous systems. They are in flight or fight. When in this state the amygdala shuts down the prefrontal cortex bc it processes info too slow. So literally the thinking part of the brain is shut down!! Think about that
It's not just the parents (all though all cases are different and it most definatly is sometimes) its a lot broader than that. In western post colonial cultures its quite individualistic and we all have a lot of pressure on us to "succeed". We need to pay bills, afford education, housing, and all the other things capitalism brings with it. Also there is a european way of being that relates to a hyrachy instead of a more equal way of relating. i've witnessed other cultures where whole generations of families live together and are very close. I cant imagine that here or in other similar cultures. Anyway thats just a small snippet but its all relatable.
Thank you so much. So isn’t the assumption here that the therapist is a healthy, integrated person? But how rare is that? Isn’t that the fallacy of therapy in general? How do therapists, who can have their own dissociation and busy, harried lives, provide the stable ground and wise insight for someone when they have a busy practice of patient after patient, and they need to pay the mortgage and deal with their kids? It seems to me that a traumatized person has to be well enough to do a lot of study, and access resources like this video, and try to find their own ways to heal, and sources of support. Plus, every good therapist I’ve ever found has NOT accepted insurance, so then good therapy is only for the rich.
Yup! My experience is same as your. Here, a good therapist is very hard to find. Even the therapists who are expensive are not good enough to provide safe environment, which is super necessary for healing.
Don't give up. I have had some less than optimal therapists and some who fit your description. However, my current therapist is perfect for me. Is he perfect? No. But his style and mine fit well together, and my brain is developing now as it should have in childhood. In fact, it's his acknowledged imperfections that are helping me to see the world through a healthier lens. He isn't there to fix me. He's there to help me face the questions that are too scary to face on my own.
Don't give up.
thank you... my words, therapy can be safe intimacy and lots of practice over time
In psychoanalysis/psychodynamic theory this has always been the thought. In psychoanalysis/psychodynamicwork the therapeutic relationship has been theorized to consist of three parts: the working alliance, transference/countertransference, and the real relationship. Evidence on each component's unique contribution to the outcome has been gathered, as well as evidence on the interaction between components. Object Relations Theory.
Very validating, thank you!
Brilliantly put excellent view,
The answer is within you.
Everything comes from within.
Thank you so much
Is there any possible therapy where maltreatment has been ongoing within a family for years and the children have problems in adulthood due to the maltreatment from adolescence can be healed thematically?
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español please
Spoken as a recognized authority. Is there sufficient data and what type of supportive data is truly credible to support these claims? Mother to child relationship is mentioned by this male psychologist...what about father to child right brain bond of emotional communication? Are fathers hopelessly inferior to mothers in this regard, never able to connect as significantly?
The mother programs the baby's right hemisphere in the prenatal months and the 2/3 years after birth through unconcious affectional and physical ques. The father programs the left hemisphere of the child from 2/3 years to 6/7 years through cognitive and verbal ques. After that, society (family, neighborhood, school, peers) program the child deeper