Fentanyl Addict interview-Jessi (follow up)
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- čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
- Soft White Underbelly follow up interview and portrait of Jessi, a fentanyl addict in Los Angeles.
Here's a link to a GoFundMe campaign to help some of the people seen in SWU interviews: gofund.me/9ebad507
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She's one of the best I've ever seen at justifying and rationalizing staying sick. The absolute insanity of addiction at its best right here. I've been there and it's nearly impossible to see it when you're in it
Oh yeah I agree. The way I thought when I was on it vs now is a complete 180 change. I remember when I tried to justify my poor decisions.
@thisplaceiswack the more honestly you look at the reality of your situation the more it will aid in forcing you to change.
All addicts do it to some extent but I’ve never seen anyone do it that bad. I hated using from pretty much the beginning when I realized it was a problem that had a hold of me.
Why judge? Do you know how many are sick and are prescribed their stickiness? Just ne kind and positive. No need to judge or assume we know. Just be kind... We will help them the best by being kind.. Period.
@@jacobus57 Prescription drugs are 100% credited with a majority of opium addictions. Also yes Fentanyl itself is prescribed to patients by doctors in extreme cases like cancer.
Never underestimate a person’s ability to rationalize negative behavior.
That's why therapy is so important. You learn positive coping mechanisms that could last a lifetime.
@@sandife4nandes365 that is the truest statement ever!! I thought therapy was bullshit until I needed it myself and it saved my life!! Not only learning coping mechanisms but also a neutral party can be paramount in someone's road to sobriety!!
@@nickklein9978 congratulations. I absolutely love life changing ( for the better) stories. I have been a therapist and been in therapy and I have so much gratitude it is beyond words.
THIS!!!!!!
Sad to see her excusing the habit that is destroying her😢
This poor girl is in COMPLETE denial..... I don't believe a word she is saying. She said that her and Roman are "Doing good and are solid with good people around them." REALLY ??? She really needs to come to reality.
Right? There's no such thing as a functional opiate addict...and surrounding yourself with other addicts doesn't make them family. Had a systemic infection from use and still hasn't come to her senses. Sad.
@Morgen Machen lol right? Lives in a tent on skidrow with no job and the only plan is for the government to give them housing!!! Now with that said, she's smart, competent, and sweet. With the right program, will and help she can be great.
@@Boomer-dt3nk absolutely. I've been clean for eight years but I remember the mental gymnastics it took for me to convince myself that heroin made me a better person, too. No one is beyond hope. And she is likeable, and kind- I wish I would have added that in my first comment. She just says some outlandish things and drugs make you the worst version of yourself - she just doesn't seem to understand that (probably because her development was stunted so severely). Best of luck to her.
@@morgenmachen2400 There are functional opiate addicts everywhere . Take a look at the amount of prescribed opiates there are in America and who they are prescribed to . I used to work part time in a residential rehab as support staff. I've seen Dr's, Bankers , architects, we once had a woman who had run a treatment centre and relapsed after 23 years clean . Some of these people hold down extremely high positions and on the outside keep mortgages and family's completely together for decades . I'll agree that in the end things usually come to a head but don't kid yourself in your weekly life people you would never guess can't live without their oxycodone or Percocet.
@@HitTheBricks89 oh I know that side of addiction. However in recent years, as prescribing restrictions have tightened and those pain management patients can no longer access their meds, they're left just as desperate as every other addict on the street and will be there too when their money runs dry. Even if they manage to keep their script tolerance increases over time and they'll begin to supplement. How do you think so many got where they are? It's only a matter of time until your back is against the wall as an addict and then people are forced to reckon with the fact they're just like the junkies they talk down on.b
She needs to go back to the hospital ASAP. Her hands are a sign of either liver failure or heart failure. They are retaining fluid and red and those are not something to mess with. Especially sense she had endocarditis which is a parasite in your heart. That’s why she said it looked like an octopus coming off her heart valve. Jessica if u see this please go straight to the hospital. I’ll be praying for u.
Okay I was wondering about her red hands . She makes me hurt by looking at her. Very sad life .
Her red hands are from her red hair dye.
I hate that she thinks opioids haven’t completely changed her. If only she were sober and could look at herself. Praying for you Jessi. I have definitely been here
You can listen to her trying to convince herself of different things while she's trying to explain her life.
My thoughts exactly!!
She came by just like Roman for the money.
@@oteliasimon 😂 cluckers
Sounds like allot of judgement from you and the other commenters!
We’re all sinners or we wouldn’t be here!!! Your right though, she’s a child & she’s full of shit.
It’s crazy how she was even trying to minimize getting a heart infection from banging. Yeah, it can happen to anyone but it most likely happened to you because you didn’t shoot pure, sterilized, medically approved substance into your vein. Instead it was most like some smashed up pill or whatever in the bottom of a spoon (I never shot up so don’t know exactly how it works).
I can't seem to scroll down far enough to find anyone providing her with a kind word after putting herself out there to be judged by the world. I hope you find this Jessi...
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so glad you found a community that has become your chosen family. Hope you and your cat stay safe and well.
Telling her the truth instead of sugar-coating the situation is being kind.
@@calum8997from random strangers on the internet. Ya really fucking helpful. Lmfao
At the end of my addiction I was using not to be sick because that sickness will make you want to die! BUT there are ways to get clean without going through withdrawals that bad. I been clean 8 years and I could not put together 3 hours sober before. At this point in my recovery I cannot remember what it is like to be high but I remember the sickness. Jess you can do this your a strong women! There is no shame in asking for help. xoox Good luck
Congrats on 8 years sober!! That is a beautiful thing, and I get that you remember the sickness more than the hi because at some point that is exactly what it becomes just using to stay well and that's it. Many blessings to you!! 😊❤
What do you take to not be that sick?
@@laurieann1536 it’s nothing u can do except gets some Suboxone or methadone if u have insurance but that’s a process. The sickness is the worst feeling ever, I don’t wish it on nobody
@@kayyjohnson8325 ya I know all to well.. i wasn't sure if there was another way besides Suboxone or methadone.. both seem to suck for my friend Tim. It made him sick sick too.. he might need the methadone
The thing is surely the withdrawals are the path you just have to go through to get to the other side so it is worth it to get the poison out of the system I think people not wanting to go through the withdrawals is just another excuse to keep using sad but true
She has rationalized her behavior quite well in her mind. I hope she gets help. ❤❤
💀
I’m just curious how long that ejaculate sat on her lip before she got that rash
Jessie, denial is going to kill you, not make you better.
If you only worked at being honest as hard as you work at trying to convince yourself everythings ok.
Any road to recovery starts with honestly connecting to where your life is & what you're feeling.
I hope you get well soon!
Denial is actually saving her right now. She's convincing herself in order to get through thr day.
I k ow what your saying gtho. In order to get clean she's gotta face reality
, that don't make sense, denial does not help anyone.
I hope she gets well soon too, I feel for her. Just my opinion. I’m a recovered addict & current alcoholic… I just want her to heal. PLEASE if you see this look into EMDR Therapy…
If you look at her hands you can see her body is losing proper blood flow. She is dying. Even her heart operation should have been a sign. And she is in denial trying to justify her lifestyle choices. What? I started my journey to get off the needle in 2019 and I'm still on maintenance working towards a better life. You have to face facts. And want the change.
Keep moving forward and doing good things! I came down from 135 mg's of methadone to 35mg's and I'm almost done being handcuffed to this crap! 👍
@shojus awesome man! I've gone from 130mgs and I'll be down to 76mg on Wednesday!
Thats fantastic. Im on my way down also. Im at 20mg now. So ready to be done. Good luck. keep up the good work
@@pattylovett4682 thank you! You too!
I did notice her hands right away. Thank you for this info as I was concerned that it was a result of her addiction. Congratulations to you! Keep up the great work and god bless
She's so different when she interviews solo! Thanks, Mark!
Man, the denial and self-enabling she's living with is wild. To sit there with a security tag still on your stolen pants while you're homeless with an active addiction and say you're on the right path is so beyond the realm of trying to stay positive about your situation. Its no coincidence her longest spell of sobriety ended right when she met Roman. Hopefully she learns sooner than later that loving someone isn't enough of a reason to keep them in your life. She calls it a "lifestyle" but its no way to live, she needs institutional help and to find a reason to live for herself.
It is a clothing security tag😂💯she’s a booster though.. I initially thought it was a hospital ER pulse oximeter.. the white clothes-pin looking thing from triage.. and then they didn’t bring it up; so I was curious.. good eye👀😆
lmfaooo
It’s delusional. It’s also a coping mechanism.
She actually looks a lot more healthy here than in the video with Roman so maybe slowly but surely things are changing for her. Sometimes things don't just automatically happen over night for those suffering with this type of addiction - the way that the media or people who have not fallen victim to an addiction would like to portray or believe.
DEEP in denial. She could just say “I’m not ready to stop doing this”.
Her eyes are so captivating !!!! I wish her good health and peace 🤞🤞❤️
Her pupils are like that because she's on opiates.
Her wrinkles are pretty captivating too!
@@Mercedesg604 people age, get over it
Becky this girl is a junkie and is going to die. Then we’ll see how captivating her eyes are
@n0raaa yes I'm aware of that fact you genious. She's a hard drug user and Guaranteed she wouldn't be looking 54 when she stated she is 34,without all the drugs. Drugs age most people impeccably fast. Put that in your pipe and smoke it Rick.
As addicts we like to use terms like "functional" in order to keep doing the shit we do. There is no such thing as a functional addict. Bottom line. This young lady needs to be honest with herself.
Jess you can live your dreams, hairdresser in Hollywood. I’ve been clean for 2 years from fentanyl I shouldn’t be alive, none of it’s gonna happen unless you get sober. You need to get real with yourself and realize 5 years from now your either gonna still be in that tent or dead, I’m rooting for you and Roman 🙏
How did you get sober, Lindsey? If you don’t mind sharing ❤
Gotta be careful with that "soulmate" stuff, ladies. Not saying its not possible or doesn't exist. However, its usually a trauma bond between two people whose childhood wounds mirror each other and its used to rationalize a lot of toxic and harmful behavior
On the nail there.
For sure
34 years old with the hands of a 68 a year old woman. You can have as much empathy as you want but dating an addict is living Hell.
I don't think her hands look 68 bro 🤨
@@teresacondon33333 your right, they look 70 sadly
Her red hands are soon in necrosis
Idk how hands look old lol unless there wrinkled but I don’t see that they are
Swollen due to IV drug use.
I watched both heir interviews. Interesting how she says her biggest fear is losing Roman, but when he was asked the same question he said his biggest fear is losing his cat Karma.
I watched his after this and noticed the same thing. A very toxic dynamic between them
Well didn't she cheat on him. Id stay with my cat too.
figures 😣
A cat will be Always by your side, I have been saved by my dog.
Well observed
I admire Mark's non judging attitude and acceptance. Sure he can see through her stories. He is a great interviewer
“There’s no way to plan that kind of thing”….
Uhh…yes, I’m pretty sure people do it constantly. Wanted to hear Mark let her know…
@@asmrmylindathat’s what he’s saying.. relax..
Depends on what state you're in. Plan... while you can. And vote.
Mark is starting to give tough love and I like it
He needs to do a little more of it ❤
@@deerheart87 yes. Like in this video and with the last three videos interviewing rebecca, he confronts them with their contradictory statements and justifications to their downward spiral. Hopefully their hearts open one day and they can easily get themselves out of their predicament while they're still young.
Equating drinking a glass of wine a day to slamming dope all day long is seriously demented.
The lies they tell themselves ❤
Depends the size of the glass, depends if the addiction is to get buzzed or just to not get sick.
Nah, a drug is a drug is a drug.
Wow in denial.No one bad hit its over.
I agree!!! Unreal 😢
Thank you for sharing this interview, Mark. Your work is truly amazing. I am learning to cope with the chronic side-effects of my own mental illnesses via the posts you make. I've also come to understand that I was keeping myself in a victim-hood mentality by denying the reality of my own choices. Kudos to you, man 🙏
She's beautiful. Could have had a great life with all the good things in life (good husband, home, career, happiness, health), instead the demon of addiction is winning and statistically will take her life. May God have mercy on her and guide her out of this hell. She's beautiful for now.
When she talks of getting pregnant and losing the baby. I empathize for her and her situation, but when she says "There's no way to plan for that". I hope someone tells her that there is.
She didn't lose a baby. She wasn't pregnant.
@@otanky296 what do you mean? they had a whole conversation about it in the beginning of the video.
@Davis Varghese starting at 2:07. Mark:So there was no baby ? Jessi: no.
From her vague language that she purposefully uses, one might think she had a miscarriage. I hear this as never pregnant though. I wish her the best .
This relationship is keeping them both in the bondage of addiction.
👍 TRUTH 👍🙄
I know. She says he’s her better half. Better half of what?
I'll never understand when an addict brags about how long they've been doing drugs. Like they carry it around like its a fucking trophy
😂ffs
As always your interviews are great. Really brings reality to others.
She looks exactly like Margot Robbie. I hope she figures it out. It can be done. I'm in relapse rn on opiates but I did have six years at one point. I think she feels deeply like me and it effects her. I have been in it 17 years and consider functioning but is it really functioning if we need it to function? I hope we both get it sorted best of luck sweet soul 🖤🖤🖤
Oh wow! I was trying to figure out who she looks like and you hit in on the head!! 🎯
How is one a functional addict, but also homeless and stealing clothes?
What she probably means by it is she's found ways of making sure she spends as little time possible being sick. She doesn't wake up without her morning drugs etc. Not saying if that's right or wrong as a definition but it's likely what she means by it.
And a hair stylist??
it is bs - that is how
Functional meaning she's coherent enough to think of ways to fund her habbit & she's not out of her mind. An example of a non functioning addict would be Rebecca who's also done interviews with mark if you haven't seen them 💜 but half the time poor thing is so high she's just gone lights are on but no one is home. This woman is sitting here high off something stronger than heroine sitting upright having a full conversation.
Prayers up for her. I pray she finds her way to recovery.
She so right, alcohol completely can change a person in a terrible way. People can become very abusive when they drink.
Drugs can definitely cloud your judgment. "Just because we live differently and society doesn't see us as 'normal'." The delusional attitude is definitely part of addiction. She's nearly died, and sees that situation as a minor speed bump. Didn't stay in the rehab center. I have a central line, and had to stay in the hospital for 4 days. She might have had to stay longer in the rehab. It's sad she regrets nothing, and is only afraid of losing Roman. Not her own life to drugs. Codependency is awful.
Can you imagine what jessi life would be without drugs.
Yep... mundane job.... expensive apartment 🙄
@@diabolivirtusen-tavares-ea4645 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
@@diabolivirtusen-tavares-ea4645 🤣
Miserable. She would just have to do something about it. Like do drugs.
Let’s hope this might help her! She seems super cool . ❤
Thank you Mark! You sound just like my psychiatrist and I feel calmer just hearing your voice! 👏
It would be really interesting to hear from the health care workers in the area so get their take on this drug and homeless epidemic. I know there are HIPAA privacy laws so I'm not sure how much they can say. But any input they could provide on the matter would be very insightful.
Well a large amount of addicts unfortunately do not seek professional help. But healthcare workers particularly emts witness a lot of overdoses especially in theses areas with large amounts of addicts. A large amount of people in the fentanyl crisis are addicted to very dangerous imported street fentanyl. It’s very hard to get hospital fentanyl outside of a hospital. (it is also not the same kind of fentanyl as would be administered in a hospital setting). Aside from street drugs which is were most addictions come from- prescribed opiates are getting much harder to get and a regulation was actually made recently to make it harder- the downside to this of course is people who actually need those drugs are being denied them and going through many other obstacles surrounding them. Another downside is people being profiled as the epidemic continues to be stereotyped. Some progress has certainly been made with the epidemic but unfortunately it continues to be held back by little and lack of resources, misinformation and lack of care particularly from the government whose laws do not help the epidemic. Yes privacy is very important so many healthcare professionals will not be able to speak specifically about experiences. I hope this comment helps though!
They can say anything they want to as long as they don't give info that can help identify a specific individual.
I can tell you her infection probably ran hundreds of thousands and opiate withdrawal is hell on a baby. The worst I cared for was a methodone case and in the NICU for 4 months. You have to administer morphine and try to wean them off according to the symptoms.
Kind soul. she has an attractive vibe. I hope she stays strong and I just hope, hope for the best for her. I hope she succeeds in life ♥️ I honestly wish the best for Jessi - massive potential
Such a beautiful person. I hope she can break the cycles we get ourselves into. ❤ My good friend would consider herself functioning also, but she still died. I understand her idea of just using because of the need to not be sick. But these days it's all death. She's better off on subuxone than fentanyl.
I’m sorry for your loss. I shot dope for 20 years, been in a methadone program for 5-1/2 years now, no dope in 5 years and 3 months. I’ve buried over half of my friends and family because of drugs and/or alcohol. I personally feel that the criminalization of substances, and the demonization of users is more responsible for all of the negative consequences of drug use more so than the drugs themselves.
Anyhoo, I just wanted to empathize with you, and went off in a tangent. Have a good morning/day/evening wherever you are in the world!
@@ahsokaventriss3268 Thanks for sharing Ahsoka. One of my friends has been at it for 10 years & your story gives me hope that maybe one day he'll get clean too.
I'm so sorry😔 and I can relate also. So so many deaths in my area, particularly between 2013-2019. I've seen this drug bury such beautiful , gifted, and loved people. I'm beyond thankful I got out when I did. Went into treatment in 2014 and although it took me a while to get it right I've been clean from all mind altering substances for three years (brief relapse in 2020) - far longer than I ever thought possible.
Something that I think is too often overlooked is the effect of an addicts actions on their loved ones. If you need, or know others who need, I highly recommend Alanon. It's a support system for people like you and the families of people like your friend.
@@lsdiesel8025 I hope so too, because so many don’t make it. Just FYI, it took me so many tries. I went to 8 long-term treatment centers during that 20 years, countless 7-day detoxes (that I usually walked out of AMA after 3 days), I did several stints on Suboxone (never worked for me-I still craved dope insanely) then FINALLY, methadone worked for me. It kept me well and stable while I did a metric fuckton of therapy to deal with past traumas.
All that to say, it takes what it takes, and nobody gets clean until they themselves are ready to do so. Also, tough love has never been helpful in my experience, actual love and support is incredibly beneficial.
Good luck to you and your friend.
@Ahsoka Ventriss I definitely agree with you on that! Although I've been off drugs for many years, I am still dealing with the consequences of my addicted actions, over 9 years later and if I didn't have support from family, I'd probably be homeless. Hopefully after the ten year mark things change for me with work and financially. I'm truly getting too old now to sustain a financially secure life until I die. From one criminal mistake, and that is the sad reality. Thanks for commenting, and sorry for your losses as well.
She (and like most addicts) lies lies lies to herself.. and they believe themselves
So sad the denial. I have family that died of fentanyl OD. It's only a matter of time. I hope she can fight this before it's too late 😞
I'm sorry you lost loved ones from that horrible drug. I'm sending my love and prayers to you
It was good to see Jessi again. I wish her and Roman the best. Glad to hear they still have the cat.
Only if they take care of it and give it the care an animal needs 😢
She's a _completely_ different person from her first interview with Roman. Like seriously different, completely different. She doesn't come off as the same person. Her eyes don't dart as much, she doesn't blink as much, less anxious, more (seemingly) confident. It makes me wonder if she just smoked fentanyl prior to the interview and this is just the drugs talking or if there's some severe dissociation at play. The scary part is that she seems much more in control here, which is scary given what's she's saying (her addiction is like a glass of wine and so on). I wish you all the best Jessi.
It’s seriously the drunks talking ! She can’t go two seconds without fidgeting!!
She was coming down off alot of meth during that interview
Terminally Unique, this is often what addicts think that they are terminally unique & they are not. We ALL go through similar EMOTIONS it’s just different experiences. And not everyone uses substances to deal with difficult emotions, trauma.
True
I haven't heard that term before thank you I appreciate your knowledge on addiction
@@jennymowery79 glad I could help.
She realizes she's been addicted more than half her life, with 9 months' sobriety in all that time. Her pregnancy "didn't work out." She lives on the street. She's moved from heroin to fentanyl. Multiorgan infection from IVDU nearly killed her. Has severe anxieties and beats herself up over her "lifestyle." All said with a laugh.
Thinking one can function and prosper on opiates is delusional. Pray she finds a way
You can definitely function off it. I’m 26 and was on it, still held a job and live in a decent house. You wouldn’t even think I was on it unless I told u. It did stop getting me high cuz my tolerance level was way to high but I was doing it to avoid the withdrawals.
im so glad you came back to mark to tell ur side and speak up more. literally i felt like was finishing some of your sentences but felt your words and process 1000% been clean for a little over 4 months and i want to say, it isnt easy but you are beautiful, you and romans relationship is one for the ages, fk the haters and good luck!!!!
Most addicts WANT to quit they just can’t get through being sick. The sickness of withdrawal is something some will never understand. You literally feel like you’re dying. It’s like your insides are trying to come out of your body.
I wish addicts knew there are resources out there! You do not have to be THAT sick. You can get help.
I wish drugs would disappear
Right, I was on opiates and it wasn’t about the high cuz it stopped getting me high but I was addicted cuz I would get extremely sick without it
Addicts know there are resources to help them and medication so they don't get dope sick. They're full of excuses because they don't want to stop using. Plain and simple!
Level headed Coping abilities and a healthy self-esteem is key to resisting the temptations of substance abuse. Life's challenges will test us!
@@elizabethsol504 so true. Those things in addition to having a higher power.
"It's like your insides are trying to come out of your body." - What a great way to describe that feeling. I have had trouble putting a label on it!
I actually gasped out loud when he asked about her being pregnant. She absolutely does not need that in her life while believing she is a "functional" addict. Unfortunately no matter what she thinks there's not a chance she could be sober during the pregnancy. I wish both of them absolute best on their journey. She still genuinely cares about life. As long as that little spark is there she still has a chance.
she said it was good they lost the baby bro - she knows the baby wouldn’t have been a good idea and definitely doesn’t see a hypothetical baby as her spark of hope… weird male comment much🦧
Yep, and this is why abortions should be available for these kinds of people
@Marina Glass she also said she would like to have a baby. So who knows what would have happened. I wasn't saying a baby would be a spark of hope at all. I was saying the she still has a spark of caring about life. She has wants for her future, not necessarily only thinking about drugs. In my experience once that hope for the future is lost it's exponentially harder to get out of that life. Her knowing it wasn't good to be pregnant and still wanting a child in the future at least gives her something to strive for. All is not lost with her and I truly hope she gets clean, which in turn will make everything else that much easier to achieve.
Children are immediately being possessed by the demonic in the womb now due to the mom looking at the devices and social media…That’s where the demons have attacked us especially the children..
She def still has a chance but shes in blinded by love and drugs.
Funny how she mentions the flight attendant instructions about putting your own oxygen mask on first, but she can’t see that sobriety is that oxygen mask.
As a sober man for many years now I know, from experience with myself and others like me, that no one gets sober until they actually want to. May she find her way before it’s too late.
So smart and so beautiful with so much potential!! So brave to be putting yourself out there. I hope you get some help and live the life you deserve. Sending positive vibes
Sober for 9 months and went back out to use again. I feel sad for Jessi, she is hardcore justifying such a negative and toxic cycle of abuse. A heart infection is a damn serious thing as is a pregnancy, please get clean Jessi, you've done it once already and you can do it again and stay off drugs.
She laughs every time after saying such heavy things. Jessi, your life & your addiction are not laughing matters. You are a valuable, unique person. Get help, you deserve it. Learn to love & value yourself. I'm praying for you.🙏No judgement. I was recently homeless for 18 months.
Arrogance is a powerful drug.
I didn’t find Jessi arrogant at all.
@@Toonces666 I feel it's more like denial
@SSwartz think he means ignorance 😅
Said she doesn't want her family judging her for her drug abuse, whilst simultaneously judging her parents for drinking alcohol.
If she only knew how functional she’d be…. Without being addicted ❤
I'm exactly the same age as Jessi and have been addicted to opiates since I was 13, most of that time. I took fentanyl, along with other opiates, for two years until I entered a methadone program. I've been on the program for 8 years and to be honest, I've long since come to terms with the fact that taking drugs is an indispensable part of my life and it will stay that way. This is my way and I absolutely do not want anyone to think that it is not worth getting treatment to get out of addiction, fight it while you can, because addiction is not fireworks, especially after so many years. Greetings 🤗 and I wish you a lot of love ❤️💜💙💚💛🧡
P.S. I noticed that Jessi and I have a lot in common, we see the world very similarly and I am also most afraid of losing my husband, who is also addicted and older than me ... I also cry when I think about it😢
Taking drugs is not an 'indispensable' part of anyone's life. We were born sober and can die sober. It's just that some people prefer not to.
@@Gram820 Some people just wear that as a badge like it's a part of their whole identity... just look at her username
You are still an addict on methadone. Get off of that and then speak.
I feel you ... I need opiates and Xanax everyday. And I probably have more than all these normies in the comments lol
She’s a sweet girl ❤😊
mark is so respectful. you're literally my hero
Not the security tag still on the back of the pants lmao
To survive that heart infection and continue using intravenous drugs is heart breaking ...how many folks have passed from a simple infection but her addiction has just complete control of her soul and her boyfriend is only an acc6to her downfall.May God Help her be free of the terrible disease called Addiction. AMEN.
So sad. She looks more put together than most interviewed. But then her chair swivels and you see the tag on the back of her pants and it makes you realize she's not all put together. Makes me so sad. I really hope she gets sober and is able to stay sober. 💜💚
Superficial, no?
@@magvs_maestro216 not really, the trousers are stolen.
Pretty much everyone will sway in a chair that turns. We like the feeling and it is self-soothing. Your comment is picayunish by focusing on these as some kind of character trait. Pfffft.
@@nhlibra
You would be right if their comments was about that, but it's not about that. "The chair swivels and you can see her tag on her paints"
They didn't say anything about the chair swivel being a tell tell sign of anything though.
@@nhlibra they aren't saying that she hasn't got her shit together because the chair is swivelling. they are saying she hasn't got her shit together because she is wearing stolen trousers....
She looks so much better than the last video of her and Roman. They both do. Sending good vibes ✨
Addicts believe their own lies...you are not ok, hope you get better...near death experience and it didn't save her, so sad, she likes the lifestyle...
Hi Jess! I do understand the functional addiction life. Both my parents were functioning alcoholics. However I did witness how it changed them. I've got 11 years clean and it is a fight daily to stay that way. Your mind is sound from what you shared here. I wish nothing but the best for you going forward. Claw for those dreams. You deserve it. Oh and .......Maybe remove the security tag from your pants.
The slap in the face that she gave the comment section at 10:14 by looking directly at the camera was perfect on her part. She let everybody know that she doesn't care what everybody thinks as she should since no one knows what she has lived and what she goes through. She is very aware of her situation.
but she does care. She doesn't see her family because she does not want to be judged by them. I'd take that as a good sign. She is human. A real narcisst or psychopath for example, just doesn't care what you think of them.
I've been there girl. I went from smoking weed to snorting coke to taking orally eventually snorting 5mg vicodins then oxys then 100 mg morphines then 30 mg oxys to finally shooting black heroin. I finally got my shit together and got on suboxone which really saved my life and I'm clean and free and never felt more alive. I hope everyone finds their moment of clarity if they are still using and gets out before its too late. My moment of clarity, was the moment I found out I was gonna have my daughter in June 2019 and it's been the greatest decision I have ever made. She's been the greatest most amazing high out of any drug I could ever take. Peace and love to all of you! 🙏✌🌈💖
You'd think her heart infection health would be a deciding factor in recovery.
Overuse of alcohol isn’t “socially accepted” either if it interferes with “normal” function it’s a problem the same as any drug. Confusion, right or wrong, between being functional or non-functional addicts. Eventually, addiction is dysfunctional regardless, definitely interferes with achieving happiness.
Her hands tell the story
Why are they like that?
@@TinFoilCat90They are like that from inserting drugs into the veins.
She still sounds sharp and coherent. She's not too far gone, definitely a functioning addict. She actually looks good for a fentanyl addict
Haha kinda.... no crazy glare... sores etc
She’s picking her shoulder a lot tho
Look at her swollen red hands and say that.
Swollen red hands from all the iv use. Hello necrosis.
Functional but living on skid row?
Everyone thinks they’re ready to run a sober house & become a professional therapist when they get some sobriety 😂😂😂
My friend almost lost his arm and his life from a heroin injection infection!!! 4! Months in the hospital & enough bills to buy a mansion! She’s blessed.
It hurts my heart that she has alcoholic family. Who knows what they’ve done to her!
I prey she gets over her foolish pride(lord knows it kicked my ass) and her bullshit, she gets sober, she grows up & she doesn’t get pregnant. Please god codependent junkie relationship & put a kind hearted person in her life who will give her hard love so her bullshit doesn’t kill her.
Amen🙏
I can’t wait to see the next update on Jess and Roman in a year or so from now. I hope both of them are doing great and they both seem to be doing a lot better than the first interview
Thank you for sharing jessi. i am from thousand oaks as well and my heart feels for you. i hope the universe guides you in the right direction🫶🏻
I believe we are creatures of habit for the most part, she's had a habit for 'half her life' that she has to change her environment if she wants to change her habits. Problem is she seems at peace with the life she has chosen. Hope she see's the light one day.
Mark really tapped into her inner self minus the outer b.s. when he asked what she most feared. She immediately lost her denialism & composure when she said she feared losing Roman. Even though in the end she said that the most important lesson is to take care of yourself first before you can worry about the significant others. It seems a classic case of cognitive dissonance since she's obviously not taking care of herself by the looks of her swollen red hands & feet. If they truly loved each other, they'd stop being codependent drug users & demand that the other check into rehab immediately.
So gross! She's constantly rubbing her arms looking for something to pick 😮 stop! It's just gross!
Damn, stop saying "know what I mean". We know, and she knows we know, she's just trying to convince us she's the best at doing her drugs. Ugh
Wow she's completely in denial about fentanyl and alcohol and how they affect you
I don’t think so. A drugs a drug. Alcohol kills plenty of people. I have known quite a few.
@@Toonces666 come on, you really can't compare alcohol and fentanyl.
@@deeayeveeeyees you can in a sense that both are very bad for your health, both can cause severe addiction, both are causes
of worldwide epidemics, both have a horrible effect on the people who love you…
@@Toonces666 never heard anyone dying after a glass of wine.
@@bs-hl2ir A glass of wine often leads to more glasses and alcoholism eventually.
I remember the dope pipe dreams of thinking me and my loser friends/lover were going to somehow be successful while slamming dope. She won't get better until she drops the denial and recognizes the state her life is in. Hopefully she can survive until then.
Just because she’s been using for years gives her a free pass on living. An old boyfriend of my started on heroin when he was 13 ( introduced by his uncle, yep who needs enemies when you have a family member like on who give a 13 year old KID.). Well he sadly died in a public toilet when he was 21. I still grieve for him and been over 35 years ago
cunning baffling powerful. I didn't know I was an alcoholic/addict until the law got involved. Grateful at 8 years sober! Praying for you Jessi!
Justify, denial mixed with clichés. Sadly not much different than Rebecca. I feel for Mark. So impossible to reach people so deep in addiction.
I’m only a subscriber yet I too have gotten attached to many of these poor souls and I grieve for them.
Mark I commend your tenacity. Mark please keep trying.
As long as she keeps justifying her drug use, she won't get clean
"I had more horrible experiences clean"
Girlllllll PA leaze!
Her hands 😳🤯
Is that a store sensor on her pants? 😂
Such a lost soul!
This girl is the potential to help others, you can see it. Addiction is hard and it’s like a hurricane, it destroys everything and everyone surrounding it. I hope that one day she wakes up and says okay I’m ready and gets the help she needs.
Jessi!!! I wish you the best!! I hope you get straight, but if you don't, I truly believe you can make some of your dreams happen. You have so many talents. Good luck to you!!!
Sending healing thoughts, and positive vibes to this beautiful young lady .she seems so strong..but scared just the same...I actually had a similar infection from IV drug use many moons ago and my kidneys still suffer..I haven't used since..
I also find it kind of sad that she's more afraid of losing him and not her own life. 😢
I don't think people who haven't experienced addiction personally or addiction within their family should really speak out on this channel.
Thank you Mark❤
I couldn’t agree more with your post! Seems like everyone is so quick to judge. As a recovering addict I can’t sit here and judge. People are saying she is trying to rationalize her addiction and maybe she is, she’s been doing this a long time. But part of being a drug addict that long is your brain is rewired and people seem to forget that’s why it’s best to not go down this path. I see a women who knows she is in a bad place but trying to make the best out of it.
❤❤❤❤
Thanks for being honest loved it
GIRL open your eyes please! You worry about alcohol changing people baby doll this is denial you're experiencing!!! Your emotion is because you are MISERABLE!! Don't stay in addiction for love. It's so easy to do. You're a beautiful person who's just had it rough up until this point. Kids? Not now because you would lose them take it from a chic who has been there! Give yourself a break GO GET HELP YOU ARE WORTH IT. You are not managing on fetty you know that. Love to you from an Ohio recovering junky💜
My brother does not do drugs however he got endocarditis (heart infection) and was in a coma for months. 4 brain bleeds. The heart infection she's referring to is pretty rare and is almost always fatal. My brother is 53 and can never drive again. He's on permanent disability. He was on a low antibiotic for his ankle that prob saved his life. Doctors told us to let go but we hung in there and one day he wiggled his toe. He walks with a cane but knows who we are and lives pretty normal. She obviously had great doctors. She should get sober since given a second chance. I have faith she will pull herself out. I wish they would hurry up and make the new Meth medicine available everywhere. These people do not have 5 years for approval.
What Meth medicine?
New meth medicine? What's that
I hope this poor girl gets help. She's such a sweet soul that's struggling
I'm 38, and this is tough watching a person in my age group be in this state. I knew kids like this growing up. They did a crap load of drugs. Not sure where they are today, as I don't hang out with those types of ppl anymore, but as I am older and wiser, it's sad to see the internal pain many classmates have that you never knew as a kid.
nobody talks about how Gen Y were the [arty til your dead generation. I have more dead friends than alive, 38
It makes me sad how much could potentially be lost here, you can see she really has the ability to help so many, but ultimately her ability to function with a severe addiction and rationalize why she's okay will be her demise.
Crikey! Addiction rationalisation at its very very best! Please get clean and help my lovely! ❤
Who the hell pays for these people? Hospital, month of IV's, nursing facility then bam, right back doing the same things that got you there in the first place. When is enough enough?
We do.
Sobriety is not for people that need it. It is for people that want it. I got sober 40 years ago. I have friends from those days who have lived and continue to live chaotic lives of suffering in drugs or drink that I could not handle, but they don't see it as a sufficient problem to do anything about. It would be naive of me to think I can get anyone else sober by talking what 'I think' is common sense. I came looking for help when I was ready, not when you were ready. You can do more damage than good with coercion and some people will inevitably die.
She's lovely and warm and kind. I wish her all the best 💛✨️
She’s absolutely beautiful. Such a tragedy. Oh I pray she can get clean one day. 🙏🏻
It’s so sad seeing these people think that they are in some family. Any one of those people would steal your bag or your money right out from underneath your nose if they could get away with it. They are the most conniving, two-faced, pathological liars, and so much more because they serve one master and that’s their addiction.
Wow girl I feel for you! You are what I could have been if I didn't get sober. Please love yourself more then this please please please