I Just Lost My Wife (I Feel Betrayed By God)

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  • čas přidán 3. 08. 2024
  • I Just Lost My Wife (I Feel Betrayed By God)
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Komentáře • 287

  • @redcomic619
    @redcomic619 Před 2 lety +134

    There’s literally NOTHING you can ever do or say to make this situation better. That’s how powerless we are as humans. I feel so heartbroken for this man.

    • @AshleyLebedev
      @AshleyLebedev Před rokem +5

      So well said. So much about life is so unfair.

  • @TheTravelerMan
    @TheTravelerMan Před 2 lety +50

    Elijah, I'll offer a big hug too. My wife lost her battle with inflamatory breast cancer leaving four children. Yes, it is hard and (spoiler aleart) it gets worse; but have faith brother, you will find happiness ahead. I do wish you well.

  • @Ilovedachshunddogs
    @Ilovedachshunddogs Před 2 lety +116

    As an agnostic person I can appreciate John’s advice. This guy is so good at what he does… helping ppl

    • @salma_Nella22
      @salma_Nella22 Před rokem

      Sometimes I wonder how much my life would change if I believed in a higher power but I can’t open up. I even went to bible school growing up, but I’d go through bible school and go home to abuse.

    • @pattyajones
      @pattyajones Před rokem

      Kristen, you are not wrong (IMHO). But your empathy for Elijah is amazing. His precious wife is now gone, so let us just send him LOVE AND LIGHT........THANK YOU JOHN for being there for Elijah.

    • @nychris2258
      @nychris2258 Před rokem +1

      You can't feel betrayed by something that doesnt exist. I don't know how people believe in god when bad stuff happens every day. Or at the very least how they believe god is good.

    • @lorik475
      @lorik475 Před 2 měsíci

      ​@@nychris2258This is one of those times when NOT commenting would have been the most compassionate thing you could have done.

  • @sabrinay9430
    @sabrinay9430 Před 2 lety +98

    The best thing I ever did for myself was make my peace with God. Bad stuff happens, people die, prayers go unanswered, spouses cheat. But I learned that the bad stuff don't come from God and he didn't promise a life without struggle. He did promise to be with us and help us overcome. That's what I hold onto. Peace be unto and your children.

  • @theydontknowmeson007
    @theydontknowmeson007 Před 2 lety +171

    Dr. John.. I'd appreciate a full episode on your faith journey.

    • @liamheffley
      @liamheffley Před 2 lety +3

      Yes!

    • @starlingswallow
      @starlingswallow Před 2 lety +3

      Same!!

    • @wanefelicia8779
      @wanefelicia8779 Před 2 lety +7

      Maybe that is personal

    • @David-wo9un
      @David-wo9un Před 2 lety +4

      That is a really strange ask; a person’s faith journey is very personal and he doesn’t need to publicly share it.

    • @oshingi
      @oshingi Před 2 lety +18

      @@David-wo9un I get what you are saying, but God does tell us us that our story of faith should be told as a testimony to others.

  • @Trapper4265
    @Trapper4265 Před 2 lety +65

    I appreciated this episode more than I thought I would. Dr. John handled the "God" premise extremely well. He didn't impose his own beliefs. He gave four scenarios or points of views, and said "you choose the one that will get you through this crisis." Kudos, Dr. John, and for you, Elijah, "Hold Fast."

  • @mirabella2154
    @mirabella2154 Před 2 lety +93

    That was the most moving episode I watched here. Elijah's pain was palpable and I absolutely understand that he feels betrayed by God. I felt that too once.
    I managed to let the feeling of betrayal go.
    But it was probably the hardest thing I've ever done. I hope he will manage to let it go as well one day.

    • @marymorris6897
      @marymorris6897 Před 2 lety +6

      Me, too. It's been twenty years since my life went to hell. (Sorry for the rough language.) One thing that has helped me is the verse, "Who has known the mind of the Lord?" I've found my capacity to love other people has greatly increased. All that happened will never make sense to me. I could add more verses, but I don't want to do anything to add to another person's pain or confusion.

  • @starlingswallow
    @starlingswallow Před 2 lety +111

    Elijah, I'm so sorry this happened. I want you to know that I too have had moments in my life where I've been angry with God, and I just wanted you to know that that's OK. God can handle your anger and he understands it. I'm praying for you, brother ♥️🙏🏻

  • @jessicasnyder4507
    @jessicasnyder4507 Před 2 lety +28

    I think that the phrase that got me the most in this call was "God shows up in the ashes" that hit me deep.

  • @Onehottherapist
    @Onehottherapist Před 2 lety +42

    Hands down the hardest call on the show ever. I couldn’t stop tearing up. My prayers are with you and your family.

  • @NeccoWecco
    @NeccoWecco Před 2 lety +26

    I lost my childhood friend recently to cancer. She was only 30... had a very rare hereditary cancer. She had a loving husband too. My heart hurts for Elijah and his family and for my friend's widower and for the life my friend could have had. Nothing is fair in life... and we must take every day as they come and do the best and be the best person we can be. Always work towards your goals and keep setting new ones so you don't get lost too long.

  • @cindyasters
    @cindyasters Před 2 lety +43

    I understand what he's saying. I lost my Mom when I was 16, so hard.. one of the reasons I married my husband is his family lived, long healthy lives. After 13 years I lost my husband suddenly, unexpectedly and one of the hardest things is I was upset because I'd see all happy families at church and every where and I felt God picked on me. It still feels that way a little. Dr. John is right to get support I had no one around who would let me talk, I needed to cry and no one cried with me. I was told to cry in the shower, grief groups didn't help because I was the youngest one and again felt why am I being singled out not to have a life with my husband. My daughter was a daddy's girl and didn't want me. Eventually, forgiving God, leaning on him helps. God bless you and take life one breath at a time for a while

    • @alannajm
      @alannajm Před 2 lety +1

      wow that is so so sad i’m so sorry

    • @addiskassa5165
      @addiskassa5165 Před 2 lety +1

      Cindyasters..You are such a brave one! I lost my Daddy when I was 11 years old..He was such a devoted dad never closed his eyes even while we sleep he gets up and pull back the blanket to cover us..We were seven children, I don't know how I describe i joy i had surrounded with him. I felt your pain. May Almighty continue give you the strength!!!🙏🙏🙏

  • @starlingswallow
    @starlingswallow Před 2 lety +45

    This one made me cry. John, everyone needs a friend like you ♥️ 😭😭😭

    • @CGA40
      @CGA40 Před 2 lety +4

      Agreed. Having a friend like John is an immeasurable blessing.

  • @catzrule5973
    @catzrule5973 Před 2 lety +17

    Elijah, my heart goes out to you. I lost my husband when my child was 8. I wish i knew then what I know now:
    1. God will get you through. Jesus said "blessed are those who mourn" and I would cry out in the darkest times "bless me Jesus, I can't do this". He would always pull me through.
    2. At 8 years old, somehow they think if they were a better kid their parent wouldn't have died. Not true.
    3. They need to see you grieving (you are teaching them how to grieve), and they need to see you playing ( to give them permission to laugh and play).
    4. The same rules apply now as before eg don't give them a break on rules and routines( like bedtime, being respectful etc) because they're/you're sad. Routines tell them that some things are still the same, and that Mom's rules still apply.
    5. Grief is like the scar after a wound. Things are different, but you learn how to live with it. Eventually you will find that though the scar is still there, it doesn't hurt the same despairing way it feels right now. This will take as long as it takes. There is no time limit on grief, be kind to yourself. Life WILL be good again, I know it. xx

  • @teetawn9454
    @teetawn9454 Před 2 lety +47

    Dr. John, this episode was touching. The empathy you showed this man was so wonderful. It showed just how much you were invested in his well-being. That was great to see. I hope he heals in time. I also hope you continue the meaningful work you do. Best to all!

  • @seaurchin4451
    @seaurchin4451 Před 2 lety +52

    I can’t express enough how sorrowful I feel for this man. In 2020 I lost my baby. I was so angry at God because I pleaded and begged to save her and he didn’t. My dad passed away a year later, and then this year I lost my grandad. Every time I ask God to please not take any more family from me. But He does anyway… and I wish I could understand, I wish I could know WHY. But I can’t and I never will. We are all meant to die. The human body isn’t meant to live forever. It absolutely sucks that’s I’ve experienced so much grief as a young adult, but I know I’m not alone in that grief. We are all meant to go through pain to help us grow. I’m not mad at God, I know He did these things for a reason, and they have nothing to do with me or my life. Whether we believe in God or not, never lose hope in that as long as we have breath in our lungs we have purpose.

    • @myballsitchsomethingfierce6319
      @myballsitchsomethingfierce6319 Před 2 lety +5

      Those people aren't lost. If they died in Christ they are free of pain, fatigue and frustration. The body dies the soul lives on.

    • @electricbeing993
      @electricbeing993 Před 2 lety +1

      I'm glad u chose life sis. When entrenched in that much death, its hard to move forward
      I commend u and send my condolences as well

    • @seaurchin4451
      @seaurchin4451 Před 2 lety

      @@benb7727 I have to disagree with you. He didn’t create us to live forever. But that’s me!

    • @seaurchin4451
      @seaurchin4451 Před 2 lety

      @@electricbeing993 thank you so much 🫶🏼

    • @benb7727
      @benb7727 Před 2 lety +1

      @@seaurchin4451 we were created in His image and likeness. God is eternal. if the curse is a death penalty than before the curse was life without death. It’s in the Bible.

  • @rachelwyatt6030
    @rachelwyatt6030 Před 2 lety +21

    My mom passed in 2018 and we knew she had cancer for only a month before she passed. I completely lost it because she was EVERYTHING to me. I was a robot for years. I ended up having a daughter on April 7 and she has my moms blue eyes. I’m finally starting to live again. I’m so sorry Elijah and thank you for your service!!! I hope you can find a way to seek help when you need it even if it makes you uncomfortable. You deserve it right now as do your children!

    • @princesskileyrae
      @princesskileyrae Před rokem +3

      I hope you're continuing to do a little bit better day-by-day ♡

    • @hismom5600
      @hismom5600 Před rokem +2

      I'm so sorry about that Rachel❤ Bless you and your precious baby girl.

  • @kimberlysmith7625
    @kimberlysmith7625 Před 2 lety +17

    It's ok to be angry, Elijah. It's ok to grieve. Your grief will never completely go away. It changes over time. You have four children who need you, desperately. Find comfort and peace in each other. Never stop talking to them. They are grieving, too and do not have the life experience or emotional maturity to know how to navigate this. Be their beacon of safety and refuge and you will discover that strength within yourself. Peace and love to you.

  • @bigpicturethinking5620
    @bigpicturethinking5620 Před 2 lety +13

    If you read this, Elijah, thank you for sharing this story. Stay strong and thank you for your service.

  • @rebeccahedberg6656
    @rebeccahedberg6656 Před 2 lety +24

    For any believer, this world is truly not our home. Gods ways and thoughts are beyond our pitifully small comprehension. But keep her memory alive and honor her as a loving wife and mother and an example to her children. Your wife's love will continue and touch others through you and your children.

  • @jeepchicful
    @jeepchicful Před 2 lety +40

    I’m so so sorry. I lost my husband best friend. My entire world in November of 21. I had a 5 year old and 1 year old. Sometimes it still feels like I can’t get enough air in my lungs it hurts so bad.

    • @lmlmlmlm7627
      @lmlmlmlm7627 Před 2 lety +2

      I’m so sorry :( May God grant you healing, comfort and strength. Sending love and hugs your way

    • @electricbeing993
      @electricbeing993 Před 2 lety +1

      I hope this vid helps u as much as Elijah. Ya husband is always with u thru ya children..remember that.

    • @sandyj3945
      @sandyj3945 Před 2 lety +1

      Im so hurt to here this. My condolence...

    • @mamat1213
      @mamat1213 Před 2 lety +2

      Oh my god I know exactly the sensation you’re describing. I felt something like that when my heart aka mama passed away, I couldn’t explain but I couldn’t take a full breath. I’m so so sorry for your loss 💔

    • @queenbee3647
      @queenbee3647 Před rokem +2

      Im sending you a big hug. Ill walk with you. 💖

  • @zeal4god402
    @zeal4god402 Před 2 lety +18

    When we choose to love someone deeply, we choose to express grief deeply when their physical presence leaves us. I'm glad God never informed us that believing in Him means we would never experience pain, on the contrary He honestly stated we will face tribulation, and He will be with us through the valley of the shadow of death

  • @electricbeing993
    @electricbeing993 Před 2 lety +12

    Man, I havent broke down and cried like this in a lil while now. This was so unbelievably sad. I hope hes able to find his power again and that everyone finds the strength to choose to live and not wallow in the death. She sounds like an amazing woman. Rest in peace sis.

  • @paulet990
    @paulet990 Před 2 lety +10

    I get it. My twin sister spent 25 years fighting depressio. I retired a year ago to spend more time with her and realized how bad she had gotten, but I chatted with her almost every day and tried to visit her and do things together. Then she died unexpectedly 3 months ago. The grief is endless. My husband has been patient and supportive but I don't even want to be close to anyone now. Sorry, didn't mean to make this about me. I just get the grief. I never had a clue before.

    • @rachelgooden9981
      @rachelgooden9981 Před rokem

      How did she die? How Old was she? No one is closer than a twin except for your own child. This sucks.

    • @queenbee3647
      @queenbee3647 Před rokem +2

      Its normal. My only sister, to whom I was extremely close, walked out the door on a date and never came home. She died in a car crash. Just like that I went from being a duo to being a solo. That was 53 years ago. I miss her every day. She died at 16 and never got to do the stuff I did. You have the memories. Dont push those away. The joy I do have about Suzy is when I share crazy stuff we did with my daughter. She loves hearing them. Maybe it would help you to talk about your twin. Bless you.

  • @702prodigy
    @702prodigy Před 2 lety +8

    man i can’t imagine his pain.. god bless him and his family..

  • @bumblebeepix9178
    @bumblebeepix9178 Před 2 lety +6

    Wow. I literally searched on this channel just last night looking for this subject as I'm in the same place. That flagged the algorithm to show me more of this channel and this comes up the next day. A lot of helpful and information and I can say being 8 months out from my own tragedy that a lot of what's said here is correct.

  • @garydeurlein8708
    @garydeurlein8708 Před 2 lety +5

    I am so sorry. Trust me, it’s ok to feel betrayed by God… to feel anger towards Him….to hate Him at this moment. I have been there. When my sister was killed in a car accident.. when my brother was killed in a house explosion.. I felt like He turned His back on me. That said, I now understand… He was walking right beside me… holding my hand…through my grief. He is with you too.

  • @rubykhan2294
    @rubykhan2294 Před 2 lety +8

    I appreciate Dr. Delony’s approach on how he just allows people be and not say those weird phrases that feel dismissive. This mans pain was so palpable and I get why He feels that way & Dr John didn’t scold him or dismiss his feeling or judgement but rather than allowing that man to feel what he was feeling and encouraging his feelings to be herd. May God make it easy on this family♥️

  • @Koraeffect
    @Koraeffect Před 2 lety +7

    “Let’s start with god”…. Oh Elijah, don’t give up, I pray you find peace within forgiveness and purpose

  • @cutehumor
    @cutehumor Před 2 lety +5

    GOD made us no promises that we all will live long lives for we all die. God did promise us free salvation in Lord Jesus for those who believe in him

  • @ithinkigottalent4047
    @ithinkigottalent4047 Před 2 lety +10

    Blessings to Elijah and his family 🙏🏾❤️ The fact that he called Dr John, he's going to be just fine . . .it will take time to get there.

  • @Games.Gadgets.Sports
    @Games.Gadgets.Sports Před 2 lety +15

    Amazing advice n he was spot on, on how u feel. I lost my wife in 19 n went thru this all exactly. Worst time of my life. Took a gd 2 yrs until I cld truly accept it. I think the remarry thing though is up to God. I was drowning and God put someone in my life a few months later n even though my grieving lasted much longer it saved my life I married 5 months later. Been married 3 yrs in Feb 23 n God couldn't of put someone so gd into my life. Don't force it but if God puts someone into your life don't fight it. I had hard time n even after we married it was hard but she helped me so much

    • @electricbeing993
      @electricbeing993 Před 2 lety

      Bless be the woman who brought u peace.

    • @Games.Gadgets.Sports
      @Games.Gadgets.Sports Před 2 lety

      @@electricbeing993 thank you! 3 yrs in feb and she is amazing. took me awhile to accept it was ok to love again even after i alrdy did but God knows what each of us need in tragedy.

    • @TheTravelerMan
      @TheTravelerMan Před 2 lety

      I lost my wife in 2015 and remarried a year ago. Looking back God was preparing me to be the man whom my next wife needed in her life. Glory to God.

  • @TraitorHater
    @TraitorHater Před 2 lety +14

    Oh boy. When I was 33 I got very sick, and almost died. At one point, I did die during a surgery. When I was sick for those months, I accused God of leaving me. When I died I realized we could never be alone if we tried. There is no where in this universe where God is not with us.
    God doesn't control all the bad things that happen. He is still there with you when you blame Him. My biggest regret in life is questioning that. I hope he can understand that sometimes we cannot see everything and the path of life from our blinded vantage point. Someday he will understand all of it in a bigger way and will be touched by the beauty of his life, even during these times. Enjoy missing her because it means you knew love, and remember who gave you that love in the first place, friend.

  • @FalconsWhiteSox
    @FalconsWhiteSox Před rokem +4

    Elijah, please never give up on God. Keep praying to him and tell him how you feel. Try to remember all the times he kept you and your loved ones safe. Try to think of all your blessings.

  • @patriciat5323
    @patriciat5323 Před 3 měsíci +1

    Yayyyyy Dr John. I hate it when people say " everything happens for a reason "
    Makes me cringe.
    Thankyou for helping and caring for people. 💘

  • @mikeutech
    @mikeutech Před 2 lety +15

    Great call Dr John. My heart breaks for and with Elijah and his family.

  • @AllThingsSoul
    @AllThingsSoul Před 2 lety +6

    Elijah, I am so sorry this happened to you. You seem like a great guy! I love the fact that you took notes! Dr. John, your advice was amazing. He's allowed to laugh. He's allowed to see a beautiful woman and think man, she's beautiful. When my Mother passed, I was so angry with God. Time eventually healed my anger. Elijah won't be single for long! He's a gem!

  • @fluffyspunsugar
    @fluffyspunsugar Před 2 lety +5

    I'm teary eyed, and I'm so sorry for this caller's loss.

  • @karydiaz74
    @karydiaz74 Před 2 lety +4

    I felt this call deep in my core! At some point in my life I did feel this way 🙏😔 God is always there. Sending love your way!

  • @sherwinevangelista5535
    @sherwinevangelista5535 Před rokem +2

    i don't understand as well how some people kinda receive extreme challenges, while some don't. 😞

    • @petrap1769
      @petrap1769 Před 3 měsíci

      some are lucky some aren't

  • @U.SFreedomU.S
    @U.SFreedomU.S Před 2 lety +6

    Wow!
    I’m stunned at this whole call,
    Thank you sir for your service,
    DR D you are amazing! Ramsey is so lucky to have you on board.

  • @yolylacy5416
    @yolylacy5416 Před 2 lety +6

    The best advice I have heard. Thank you, Dr John.

  • @butterfly32812
    @butterfly32812 Před rokem +2

    Wow…Dr. John is phenomenal. This brought me chills. He met the man where he was and grieved with him. He showed him perspective and hope. You are made for what you are doing, Dr. John. Thank you for what you do. ❤

  • @CJ2023Incognito
    @CJ2023Incognito Před 2 lety +1

    In tears listening to this. You are not alone Elijah 💙

  • @danyelleb2646
    @danyelleb2646 Před 2 lety +9

    😭Praying for him.

  • @virginiawango3968
    @virginiawango3968 Před 2 lety +2

    I have stopped asking where is God and I've started asking where are God's people. Awesome point Dr. John.

  • @veggiedumplinn
    @veggiedumplinn Před 2 lety +4

    Elijah you are strong and I wish you the best. Stay strong for those kids and continue to seek the counseling you might need

  • @jenniferolson5345
    @jenniferolson5345 Před 2 lety +2

    Prayers for that gentleman 🙏💗

  • @jaymecarroll4074
    @jaymecarroll4074 Před 2 lety +6

    Praying you my friend!!

  • @mikebee6633
    @mikebee6633 Před rokem +1

    Recently lost my wife of 20 years and this is the best advice that I have ever heard. Everything that he is saying is true. Love this guy.

  • @bettysmith4527
    @bettysmith4527 Před 2 lety +1

    So sorry for your loss sir, I hope you and your children can enjoy your life and your new home knowing she IS with you!

  • @SaystheTruth3
    @SaystheTruth3 Před 2 lety +1

    Elijah, my heart goes out to you & your children... ❤️ Wishing you much strength and love in your future.

  • @ingramwifey2016
    @ingramwifey2016 Před 2 lety

    😭😭😭 my heart goes out to you, Elijah. I pray you find the peace you are after.

  • @ilovefefi
    @ilovefefi Před 2 lety +10

    What a sweet man. This is heartbreaking. 😢 That was my daddy, and my stepdad as well. I pray my husband doesn’t have to go through this this. I pray you find strength in the process sir. Great advice Dr. Delony.

  • @pisces3121
    @pisces3121 Před 2 lety +1

    JOHN!!!! I really see you in a whole different way! You really are and expert on so very, very, very many levels. Whole new respect for you.

  • @LoveLacedRN
    @LoveLacedRN Před 2 lety +1

    Excellent Dr. Delony! Superb.

  • @zmanphotos1578
    @zmanphotos1578 Před 2 lety +3

    Elijah I’m in Austin, please reach out if you need someone close by, I’m here for you

  • @phyllis9750
    @phyllis9750 Před 3 měsíci

    You poor, brave man. I want to hug you! You are clearly a good man, and that's hard to find. Stay strong and ask for help when needed. I hope all the best for you and the kids.

  • @thelehr99
    @thelehr99 Před 2 lety

    Elijah, sending hugs and prayer, you are in recovery mode, don't rush it, one day at a time, and sometimes one second at a time works too. Find someplace you can weep

  • @beamar76
    @beamar76 Před 2 lety

    My deepest condolences a big bear hug to you and your family

  • @mikeshaw4610
    @mikeshaw4610 Před 2 lety +1

    Very good, as you said time and chance happens. Sometimes it really hurts.

  • @AshleyLebedev
    @AshleyLebedev Před rokem +1

    To this man who lost his partner, I just send you my love. Many strangers are touched so much by your story. Many also have experienced this level of darkness and they are listening and understanding. You are a wonderful person. Go to nature x

  • @weekendnomad5038
    @weekendnomad5038 Před 2 lety +1

    Your words to him were absolutely beautiful what a great session/ I’m CRYING 😭

  • @RachelReaiah
    @RachelReaiah Před rokem

    Sending hugs to you Sir, I pray healing and comfort and peace. I went through this as well

  • @coluccifresh
    @coluccifresh Před 2 lety +1

    This is an amazing episode. Thank you John

  • @lakeishag76
    @lakeishag76 Před 2 lety +5

    Really appreciated this episode! Such great advice ❤️

  • @markeayers
    @markeayers Před 2 lety +10

    I've lost a wife at 36 years old. I didn't blame God. My God comforted and carried me through it. Unfortunately, asking God to not do something isn't insurance that that something won't happen. Life is full of heartache and knowing that God truly loved you and is there for you makes life a bit more bearable. Prayers for this young man and his children. 🙏🏻

  • @Hiddenplace414
    @Hiddenplace414 Před 2 lety +2

    I feel u brother. I lost my only brother and then 2 years later last month I lost my mom. I'm only 30 and have two kids to raise alone. It really suxks and it has made me question God's plans for my life and my faith. I try my best to understand that some things I have no control over and can't understand. One baby step at a time.

  • @LarennPBel
    @LarennPBel Před 2 lety +1

    Good information Dr. John Delony

  • @qualitygamingchannel5051
    @qualitygamingchannel5051 Před 2 lety +3

    Brought to tears there at the end 😢

  • @christiangirl4272
    @christiangirl4272 Před 2 lety

    I'm praying for you and your kids. Hang in there 🙏

  • @lifeisbeautiful9455
    @lifeisbeautiful9455 Před rokem +1

    My mother was 39 and domestic violence is the reason why she’s not here. He ruined the whole family. It’s been almost 29 years and I had to grow up my sis lungs and I without our mom to this abusive man but he’s still alive and never had to pay for it.

  • @tricerider8692
    @tricerider8692 Před rokem +1

    Dr Deloney is awesome.

  • @dorianmorton67
    @dorianmorton67 Před 2 lety +5

    John is so good!!

  • @blankuser3158
    @blankuser3158 Před 5 měsíci +1

    Bro just stitched some real serious therapy in with some therapist training for this father. That's amazing

  • @VonSolo5
    @VonSolo5 Před 2 lety +3

    🙏 Praying for Elijah and his kids.

  • @locosmiley2008
    @locosmiley2008 Před rokem

    Very Well handled

  • @roneedarby6664
    @roneedarby6664 Před 2 lety

    This talk is amazing because This is is HELP!!! Praising God

  • @sunkist3304
    @sunkist3304 Před 2 lety

    I think I’d feel the same way. I hope he fully heals from this.

  • @kimdelaney9775
    @kimdelaney9775 Před 2 lety +2

    Wow --- this was a tough call. Dr. John, I don't know how you do it or even have done what you have done over the past 20 years. I could tell in your voice how much you hurt for Elijah and how much you care. I pray he reaches out to guy friends, including you. Thank you for what you do. ♥

  • @kathleencooney1518
    @kathleencooney1518 Před 11 měsíci

    This call has me crying. I am so sorry for this lovely man.

  • @prettyme3150
    @prettyme3150 Před 2 lety

    Elijah, there's nothing I can say that would help. But I pray the peace of God be upon you. I'll remember you in my prayers 💕

  • @DrJack144
    @DrJack144 Před 2 lety +8

    Quite honestly, I lost my faith under related circumstances. A friend of mine who was a childhood cancer survivor and a fellow Ph.D. student at the time was killed when his car went off a cliff on the CA coast. Nobody was drinking or doing anything wrong. This guy was a devout Christian. He did everything he was “supposed to do”, and it wasn’t good enough. I made the conscious decision that I simply refused to worship a God who would allow that. That is not a God who loved anyone or any other trite saying. Can try to rationalize it or somehow fit into a narrative that suits it so that it’s somehow “acceptable”, but I just can’t do that. Been about 14yrs since that incident, and my feelings have never wavered.

    • @helenathiessen7839
      @helenathiessen7839 Před 2 lety +1

      I had someone tell me something after my husband died that has stuck with me. Its been 8 years since I lost my husband. He was 29 and I was pregnant with our 4th child.
      God never wanted death, he is the giver of life. She said it was never his plan that a young, very loved father of 3 children should die but since Satan entered the picture in the garden of Eden, tempted Adam and Eve and they caved, there is now death. Sin/Satan is the reason why we have sickness and death. In God's perfect world there is only happiness so if we accept Jesus as our Savior, we can go to Heaven where we can live in eternal joy!
      It took me quite a while to see her point of view and I can see it too as well as believe it!

    • @kytoga
      @kytoga Před 2 lety

      Jack, I am so sorry for your loss. Just some thoughts.... In the end of time, His whole point... Is to conquer sin and death, and to take the sting of death away.... Death sucks, He knows... We were made to be eternal beings. The injustice of death, IS pain. In our gut, we know "dying" isn't right. But.... our HOPE, in Christ, IS eternal life...

    • @timetravlin4450
      @timetravlin4450 Před 8 měsíci +1

      If he’s a Christian and you were a Christian you believed at the time he’s in a better place. Why are you mad that he doesn’t have to deal with any pain and suffering? People kill themselves or struggle with suicidal thoughts because of suffering and pain in the world. your friend won’t have to deal with any of that If he’s in heaven.

  • @blacknbougie8021
    @blacknbougie8021 Před 2 lety +3

    I can totally relate. I lost my son in February & I was already an atheist prior to his passing. Sometimes I think whoever this "god" is, he might be "punishing me". Idc bc if "he" can take one of the most important ppl in my life, then I'll continue to ignore him. NOBODY ON EARTH can convince me that there's an all loving deity in the sky that will sit back & watch a 13 yr old baby take his life & do NOTHING ABOUT IT. Idk if "god" is real but I do know that my Kingston was/is & the pain from losing him is worse than grief, it's worse that sadness, depression & loneliness. It's fear, dread, shock & hopelessness. I refuse to praise a god that'll take away a son, a brother & grandson & leave an entire family broken & confused.
    I'm so sorry Elijah.....I can't say it gets better but there will be days where you can feel small drops of happiness but it'll be tainted with the loss of your wife & can't tell you how to get over it bc.....I haven't.
    Wishing you peace & healing❤🌷💙

    • @kytoga
      @kytoga Před 2 lety

      I'm so sorry for your loss.

  • @iPervy
    @iPervy Před 2 lety +1

    good job john.

  • @josh.kaptur
    @josh.kaptur Před 2 lety +5

    Belief in the Sovereignty of God can be a huge comfort, or deeply traumatic, depending on your faith posture. I've watched people rise in incredible tragedy with a "the lord gives and the lord takes away... blessed be his name" confidence. For me, it has been the biggest source of doubt in my Christian walk (God ordained/decreed THIS? Why? For his glory?), and yet the implications of abandoning it for that reason are equally untenable (so God is not ultimately in control, which means...). I live in this unsettled place wavering between abandoning it all because it can't be true, but unwilling to risk being wrong... maybe (I hope) that's mustard seed-level faith and (I think) better than pretending I'm not troubled by parts of God's character.

  • @alleyallen5537
    @alleyallen5537 Před rokem

    I’m so sorry Elijah ❤

  • @gatesmom1188
    @gatesmom1188 Před 2 lety

    Godbless this man 🙏🏼

  • @madebydeci9955
    @madebydeci9955 Před 2 lety +1

    Please love your family and do the best every single day. Do not waste time, you only get one life. God bless you all and keep pushing forward. Such a tough call.

  • @jennyspicer6900
    @jennyspicer6900 Před 2 lety

    No words just tears 😭

  • @helixmoore7636
    @helixmoore7636 Před 2 lety

    I really hope he finds happiness. 🙏

  • @b.1162
    @b.1162 Před 2 lety +4

    As an atheist, the way I understand it is God is all-powerful, yes? He could have saved this woman, but didn't want to. Free will, you say? Except no one chooses to get cancer, not every cause of cancer is known, and not every cause is due to our own choices. If God created humans and every cell in our bodies, then God created cancer. Now tell me what is the point of that? What is the point of babies being stillborn? Was that their choice? Where do miscarriages fall within God's plan? If you absolutely have to believe in God, I don't understand how you can do so without accepting that God has absolutely nothing to do with what happens to you on earth, only that you continue to believe and praise Him for it. If you can make peace with that, more power to you.

    • @ivnehaas
      @ivnehaas Před 5 měsíci

      I hear you loud and clear. I used to be very Christian, but life happened, and I prayed, and I cried, and I begged, and now I don't know if I know God. If God exists, who is he? Where has he been? How can he sit and watch and not step in? He does to test people? To see if people will continue to love him no matter how much they suffer? If a person acted like that, he/she would be called abusive, or narcissist, or cold... We can try to get in God's head to justify his behavior, but John says "behavior is a language", so what is God's actions and inactions say about him?
      Yeah I am also mad at God, and there's no point in hiding that. After all, God sees through the bs, right?

  • @freedomfan4272
    @freedomfan4272 Před 2 lety

    Damn man I am sorry for you and the kids. I'm 34 never married and no kids but listening to this almost made me tear up.

  • @opizacharyuhaulhascomeinmy2139

    i’m so sorry blessings

  • @TheJgraham12345
    @TheJgraham12345 Před 2 lety +6

    Elijah, I’m so sorry man. I hope you find peace in whatever you decide to believe religiously. Religious people need to stop claiming that god will heal you, make you wealthy, and enact miracles. It provides false hope for people and when things like this happen, they obviously feel betrayed because of the ridiculous stories people tell. I’m so sorry Elijah. Thinking about you man.

  • @dawndrew8313
    @dawndrew8313 Před 2 lety +1

    Cancer is a worldly disease and is evil..we can't ask and make deals with God..we can't negotiate...so sorry for your loss! There are no guarantees and we can't control human nature. Stages of grief are not the same for everyone...noone can fix this and I hope you find your peace! Hugs n Blessings.

  • @nathanielbugay9477
    @nathanielbugay9477 Před 2 lety +1

    Elijah, I love you brother

  • @midlifeandnailingit6342

    I’m so sorry sweet man. 😞

  • @AMM3.
    @AMM3. Před 3 měsíci

    I wish there was a universal phrase that everyone grieving would find comforting.. unfortunately there just isn't ☹️

  • @nicolejclarke
    @nicolejclarke Před 2 lety +2

    Feel so bad for him. But It always baffles me when bad things happen people say God did this to me ?????? I guess when things are out of our control we have to blame something. So heartbreaking for him.