Advice you’ve received from those passing that you haven’t shared? Negative experiences with family/friends after a patient passes? Worst experience(s)?
Aunt died of cancer on hospice, her ex husband was found dead from cardiac arrest the next week. Rough for my cousin for sure. I like to think he went to go see her once more
It happens a lot with older couples who have been married a long time. My fiance's grandparents went into hospice care together, lying in bed side by side. They died within days of each other.
It is hard but seeing the heartbreak of the one still here is also a really awful experience. Just my personal experience, but there was some relief knowing my beautiful Mom wasn’t in that kind of piercing emotional pain anymore. When you spend multiple decades loving and building a life with someone, I imagine you just want to be with them.
My best friends parents died this way too(dad passed and mom died of a broken heart). Then 3 months ago she lost her sister to cancer. She is a very strong lady but we all have our limits. 😢
My great aunt and uncle died days apart. He died the day of her funeral, which also happened to be their wedding anniversary. So we had her at his funeral. It was a rough week emotionally.
My mom passed away February 1992 and my dad passed February 2008. One time he told me that he never expected to live that long without her. They were sweethearts until the end. He still carried the picture she sent him while he was overseas in WWII in his wallet. What an example they were! I'm so thankful he did though. We were his caretakers for the last 8 years of his life. My children would have missed out on getting to really know him.
@@evelynfrederick Yes, Dad was a fantastic man. He and Mom would hold hands as they went on their daily walks around the small town we lived in. I am truly grateful and blessed by the Lord to have grown up with them as my parents.
Same w/ my grandpa, & I think he stuck around as long as he did after grandma's death bc of Us grandkids; we were all Super Attached to both grandma & grandpa.....he knew that. Miss you guys every day, can't wait to see you again soon❤️❤️❤️
This is starting to happen to my dad. He is 85 and in general good health for his age but he is slowing down, sleeping more and had a smaller appetite abd experiencing some dementia. He sometimes sees my mom, who passed in 2013, in his dreams. He says she is waiting for him. It makes me a bit sad but also happy that they will be together in the end.
Man. This video hits hard. I was a cna with a lot of end of life patients for a decade, and I've been in a relationship for 15 years and going strong, so I've both seen this first hand and it's one of my biggest fears for myself or my partner later in life. We've been together our entire adult life. If we make it to old age, we won't know how to be alone.
I won't lie, Druelia, it's rough. But you *can* make it through. I have survived my wife by ten years so far and if you asked me what happened or what I did for at least the first five years after I lost her I wouldn't be able to tell you much. Grief forms an all encompassing fog over the period; I suspect it might be a self-defence mechanism our minds employ to help us carry on. From what I learned in the immediate aftermath tho', from both professionals and others who had lost their spouses, if you make it past the first couple of years you are probably going to make it. The pain never goes away but there is a way forward and that is to reignite your life so that your grief is not the only thing in it. Some days I feel like I am just going through the motions of living, waiting for this biological machine to run down so I can be with her again. Those are not good days, as you can imagine. But others are normal enough and, over time, you get more of those. So hope for the best and do not fear that the worst may come, for there is no sense in spoiling the time you have in the present by a worried anticipation of what might be.
I've 'only' been with my husband for 21 years, and I'm only 45 years old, but I don't know what I would do if something happened to him. I would feel like that, what do I do now?
@@dallassukerkin6878 my grandma once told us… (possibly in the immediate days after the unexpected death of my younger cousin)… that it took her almost 3 years after grandpa’s death before she really, truly cared about how she dressed for leaving the house. Grandma was always a stylish woman, so I’m certain many casual observers noticed, but for her it was more of just “going through the motions” until she made it through the grieving process to when and where she felt fully ready to get on with life. My grandparents had just celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary less than a month before grandpa passed away. Grandma lived another 31 years, finding purpose in her favorite volunteer positions well into her 90s.
This hits close to home. When my husband died suddenly, I didn't know how to live alone. We'd been together since I was 19. We only had 33 years together. I didn't know how to take care of anything, he always did it. I didn't know how to be a grown up alone. Never blessed with children. I'm all alone now. I'd rather be with him. When the lady said what do I do now... That's what I said too. 😢🤧😭🤧😢 👵☮️🖖
Hello! I don't know why, I just feel compelled to talk to you. I'm 44 yrs. Old and I have been married for 20+ years, and I think of that often. He is still here, but I worry all the time if he goes 1st. I'm not the healthiest of people and I feel sometimes I'm too consumed with death. I wish you didn't feel alone! I would love to talk with you and share stories! I pray you find happiness and friendship very soon!
@@garvy12345 Hi, Keep up with his medical condition, make sure he gets his check ups, and feed him healthy food, keep healthy snacks around. And tell him you are scared of being left behind. I didn't. Now here I am living in regret. Take care of yourself too. Eat more broccoli. And save money like you are going to live to be 100 and retire comfortably. My father's 401k nose dived a couple of months before his retirement. He retired with less than half of what he expected. Diversify your money investments. Because of personal disasters I cashed out my pension money so I have nothing coming when I get to retirement age, except social security benefits, and that's not enough to live on. You don't know what tomorrow brings, but be prepared for every possible disaster. And have your husband teach you how to take care of everything, the car, the house, etcetera. I didn't know what day the trash went out, nothing about the car, etc. I hadn't even pumped gas in over 25 years. I'm a mess, don't be like me. Be prepared. That will help bring some confidence just incase you are left behind when the time comes. Best wishes, take care, stay safe, have a nice day. 👵☮️🖖
This was my grandparents. They were married 65 years. My grandmom passed January 2019 very unexpectedly. My grandfather passed May 2019. He didn’t know how to live without her. She always made sure he ate and took his meds. He died of a broken heart. He carried her picture in his pocket until he died.
Late reply, but this made me cry. Currently finding care for my grandparents married 65 years in may. They have taken care of each other their whole lives so when one gets worse, the other follows. It’s gut wrenching. Thank you for sharing this, i’ve been struggling to find stories similar to my own and feel lost 😢
@@zacgallenlover911 I am so sorry your facing this. It was heartbreaking to watch unfold. All we could do was be there and do whatever we could to keep him comfortable until he went to be with his “BW” (Beautiful wife) as he called her. Make sure you know where all current Wills are and what their final resting plans are and exactly what they want. It was a huge source of tension when my grandmother suddenly passed when we didn’t have the updated docs and it led to some ugly things with vindictive “family”. Thinking of you and your family in this delicate time. May they both have a wonderful time here and in the afterlife and when their time has come a peaceful transition.
@@ailanisd8594 We already purchased a dual plot 💓 They refuse to be separated. My father is by far the most sensible in the family and has executive control of the will in case “family” wants to lie about things. Thank you so much for the response. The longest they’ve been apart since they met was 2 weeks.
My grandparents passed 4 days apart. They were the epitome of ‘can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em’. They were divorced but had been together 40+ years. My grandfather was diagnosed first with colon cancer. After a year he was on hospice and had someone coming regularly. During that time my grandmother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She didn’t have the coverage for a nurse, but those sweet women would bring extra stuff and kept my nana comfortable for as long as they could. It took her swiftly, within 3 weeks. She passed before my grandfather. He came in, sat with her for a while, told my mom his wishes for her funeral, went back to his bed….and just went into a coma. He never woke up again, and he passed 10 minutes after her viewings ended. Spending nights over there, helping with things, I heard my grandmother calling him. I swear she was waiting for him…
My ex husbands grandparents were placed in a home care facility together. Not a nursing home, the type where it is run by an RN and a staff in a residential house. They were able to be in the same room and spend their days together. Grandpa Miles passed first and less than two weeks later Grandma Lois passed of a broken heart. They had been married almost 75 years if you can believe it. This was back in the early 90's and boy did they have a story to tell of how they got married. They were special people. Just like you Nurse Hadley! Thank you for helping people understand how important hospice care is!
@@steve7006 Lois was 16. Miles was 18. He got called up to fight in WW1. He wanted her to be his wife but her parents would not have it. So they drove to the next county over and got married by the justice of the peace in secret. He shipped out and she went about her life. Getting his letters from the western front about a month after he wrote them. They were redacted and checked, lest they be giving up information they shouldn't. She still had those letters in a box when we cleaned out the house. He was gone for just over a year almost the entirety of the time the U.S. was involved in the war. He was a soldier in the army in the fox holes and the trenches. When he returned, he showed up on her doorstep and when her father answered, Miles boldly exclaimed, "I'm here to get my wife!" to which her confused father replied, "What do you mean your wife? You are not married!" It was then that he produced the certificate. Lois was standing behind her father, who was a very tall and burly man, dressed in her Sunday best, suitcase in hand, and hat on her head, ready to go off with her husband. He spent the next several months building her a house that still stands on the family homestead in the town that their respective families helped to found. I felt privileged to know them both. I hope I get to see them in heaven because they were some of the best people! They had a love story for the ages.
I am not a hospice nurse, but my grandpa was on hospice and while his nurse would come and visit and check on him and talk to me, I did the primary care taking while my mom worked. I'm glad he passed. No more pain. He was 91 and passed the week after Thanksgiving last year.
I’m over crying. This happened to my grandparents. My grandfather passed in January. My grandmother went to be with him only 15 weeks later. They were married for almost 70 years. Two weeks before she passed, she told my mom that my grandfather came to see her and brought her a hot dog and stayed to chat.
I took care of a husband and wife as a hospice nurse. Both had dementia. He died right there in their bed while she sang songs to him. She died about 2 weeks later because she just couldn’t function anymore. She became even more confused without him there.
Both of my parents were under hospice at the same time. They both had cancer. My mom passed away followed by my dad 6 months later. As their primary caregiver I couldn’t have done it without hospice.
Not a hospice nurse (and not a hospice story) but I worked in a hospital with a cardiac surgeon who always wanted to be paged immediately if one of his patients said they were going to die. He didn’t care if everything looked good- he wanted to know if they said that and he would always come and do a work up to see what was going on.
Thank you so much for this. I've always been terrified of death (my parents, my husband, my own) and no matter who it is- distant family, close loved ones..... it ALWAYS hits me sooooo hard. Slightly over a year ago, we lost my hubby's uncle, (60+y.o.) whom we were very close to, to a bad fall. I still have not recovered from it. About a week ago, we lost my hubby's 2nd cousin (23y.o.) to a bad motorcycle accident. He was cut off by a 70+y.o. man who just pulled out in front of him. 57mph to 0mph in an instant. Ironically, he was a motorcycle instructor. We met him only once but it still hit/hits me soooo hard... My 81y.o. father is looking at open chest & lung surgery just as soon as they can control his Afib. I'm trying to prepare myself but it's soooooo hard..... Thank you for all that you do. I appreciate it sooooo much!
This is obviously really really sad, but I also think it's extremely beautiful. To love someone so much, even after 50 years that you are unable to part from them. Maybe it's just because one set of my grandparents divorced over a decade ago (and were never really visibly loving in front of us grandkids) and the other set has been married 55 years exactly today and I don't know that I've ever seen a more miserable couple where abuse was not involved. THAT is incredibly tragic to me. To continue to be married to someone you clearly detest (at least from my gma, my gpa definitely loves his wife, he just is a bit of an asshole and enjoys picking on her). All that to say: I love seeing people who stayed together because they LOVED each other dearly not out of convenience or whatever other reason my grandparents are still together.
I had a female patient who passed, I think it was on a weekend. Within 72 hours her husband was gone. My father in law managed to last about a year after my mother in law. My mom went on the exact same day as my dad 25 years later. December 9th.
This was my parents. My dad passed January 2022 and mom 14 months to the day later. I honestly was surprised she waited that long. She was heartbroken 💔 and now we are
The same happened to my aunt’s godparents. Her godfather died because of an illness he’d had for a long time. At the funeral, she didn’t her godmother, thought that she must be on the toilet or at the front. When a speaker came up, they told everyone in the church that the wife, who had some health issues, but nothing really major, died just a few days after her husband did.
This is beautiful. Thank You for everything you do for people and for understanding their needs. I was raised by my Grandparents, they were married 63 years and I know they were Soulmates. They were always so happy together. I even remember going grocery shopping with them when I was a little kid and they would sing together the entire car ride there. When my Grandma passed on in Jan 2007, she was 83 and I was sure my Grandpa would pass soon after because he loved her so much. I was so surprised that he lived another 6.5 years without her. But I think he stayed around for us (his Family - 2 daughters and 2 granddaughters) because we all still needed him, I know I did. He passed on in June 2013 at the age of 88. When he passed on, I was in the hospital room with him and I felt 2 feelings, one was happiness for him because he was finally free of an aging body that no longer worked and reunited with my Grandma but the other feeling was intense sadness for myself because I knew how much I was going to miss him. It's been almost 10 years but I still miss him so much but I am Forever Grateful my Grandparents raised me, they gave me such a great childhood which gave me a great foundation for Life. And in 2017 when I was going through a very rough time in my Life, my Grandma visited me in a dream, it was so real, I know it had to be a visitation dream, she told me how much she loved me and it helped me get through that rough time. Thank You again for everything you do for people and believing them when they talk about their loved ones coming to get them. You do such important work in this Life.
When I took nursing in high school it was a couple that shared a room and she was better off then him, but we come in to help clean them up and get dressed for the day. She would have us just sit down and talk to her as she got him ready. She felt like it was her place to do for her husband while she still could. They were the sweetest couple and told her great grandson about me that's how we became friends in school.
There's a couple of couples I've seen that I thought were super sweet w/ each other. There's other couples that absolutely hate each other. Memory care is a bit rougher... there this 1 guy who wants to leave this 1 lady everyday. .. hes always trying to get me to make her scadaddle. He to her is her "husband"... I've never dealt w/ a hospice couple tho. I try to vent to my ex mother in law about things. Bc idk how ppl can fall asleep in any type of medical, health care type place. I don't think I'm that creeped out, I guess I'm just weirded out. By like stranger ghosts. Like in short, idk ur story. I'm sorry. Hi but also bye.
My parents passed away within 15 months of each other. They were only 60 and 61, married 29 yrs. My dad had had strokes at age 50 so my mom was his caregiver. But when she got cancer and died first, it was just too hard on my dad. We all tried hard to help him, and he tried really hard, too! He wanted to be there for the grandkids! But some circumstances just didn’t work out and he ended up with pneumonia and officially passed away from that. But we all know it was from a broken heart. One of the hardest things was seeing my mom’s casket in the ground a second time bc the bulldozer dug a little too close to it for my dad’s casket. So weird. But we were able then to do the headstone all at once. I have 3 siblings and we were all in our 20’s and very busy and trying to coordinate with my dad about the headstone and waiting on life insurance and paying for mom’s funeral all took a long time and then dad was sick too. But it’s all done now. It will be 13 yrs on April 29 since my mom passed and then 12 yrs on Sept 19 for my Dad. This is why I enjoy this channel. My mom was on hospice care for a little awhile, although not really at home, but in a hospital unit that little intervention for the last 3 days. And my dad was in a nursing home, supposedly in rehab, when he got ill. And I was with them both in their last moments. And I’ve heard of lots of people’s stories sitting with their loved ones. It fascinates me, especially bc I’m a Christian and I know where my parents are and I know where most of my family are going, to be in Heaven with Jesus. The process itself still scares me though. Your channel is so soothing and full of comfort though. And I LOVE hospice nurses. They have the hugest hearts. Thank you for what you do!
I have been watching you because my grandfather was put in hospice to prepare. But when you said she knows she is going to die made me remember when my friend in high school who was a freshman and I was a junior kept saying she was going to die within 3 months she was gone! The weird thing was she had a lot of peace about it she got in a car accident and passed instantaneously! I think sometimes people just know.
I have experienced this a few times I had a 90 year old in rehab kept telling me she was going to "die" that day low and behold I was in the chanderoom at the end of shift and heard the first code blue at that rehab in over 25 years 😮
My granddad just passed earlier this week and I worry for my grandmother. I can't remember exactly how long they were together but it must have been over 60 years. I'm going to miss him. I hope he's in a better place.
My grandma waited a whole life to reunite with grandpa. She made sure her 7 kids and her grandchildren were set and then decided she wanted to go, no use being in pain anymore, everyone had settled down and she was ready for the next adventure.
This video hits me hard. My grandparents died exactly three months apart, same day. My grandpa went last but he was with a terminal illness. He said he wouldn't leave her alone. After she's gobe, he always says he was giving us just enough time. ❤😢
My father had the best hospice team in 2020. He died at home and my mother felt so supported. They were able to celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary before he died. She just celebrated her 85th birthday.
My dad just passed in march, my parents have been in eachother lives since they were 14 and 15. Together 57 years, married for 54 and 7 months. I'm so glad my mom has me and my siblings and all her grandchildren. We've been trying to keep her going, and she seems pretty content for now. She had all of her kids here for mothers day for the first time in over 20 years (2 live out of state).
Happened to my grandpa. He had a small tumor in his lung for years. My grandma died in January. My grandpa died in June. The tumor had literally grew out of his lung, around his heart & it choked off the heart function. He died peacefully. He really died when grandma did. It’s just that some parts took longer than others.
My mom was in hospice for a year and a half. She wouldn't leave until I gave her my o k that I would be all right. The best part was I had heard to help me grieve for her loss and hencourage for me. And I was blessed to be with her when she passed. And be with my dad when he passed
My dad passed in March of 2019. My mom had taken care of him for a long time at home and then for 4 months at the hospital: she was there from morning until night every single day. Even the nurses said they had never seen anyone as dedicated and selfless as my mom. A little more than a year later my mom found out she was terminally ill. I took care of her in my home for 8 month period following her diagnosis. She passed in March 2021, one day before the anniv of my dad’s passing. The nurses that came to the house and the doctor were so wonderful. The doctor: I’ve never known a doctor to take so much time with a patient and work so hard to address needs. I was able to text or call her anytime if I needed her. I had to give the nurses such credit. I would often break down crying, mostly the last week and they were so kind and patient with me. I have ptsd from the experience but I would do it again. It was very important to me to be there for my mom and it was so important for her not to be in a hospital. I still held out hope that she would get better, right up until the end. I think without that hope I wouldn’t have been able to cope with it.
My grandma died after over 18 months of struggling with pancreatic cancer. She held on so long for my grandpa. They loved each other so much. He had prostate cancer, and Alzheimer's. After my grandmas death he moved a state over with my uncle who I have no doubt took great care of him. My grandpa kept asking where his wife was. I don't think they told the truth everytime, because everytime they did all those memories, pain, and mourning washed over him anew. They died just a month or 2 apart. I think it was more the grief and longing then any of the other health complications. Health wise he could have gone 6 more months at the very least. We know they're happily reunited, but we still miss them. My daughter was born over 3 years afterwards and was named in part after that grandma
Two days after we buried my grandfather and all of my family went back to their home, my grandmother passed. We all knew she passed from a broken heart.
My husband of 36 yrs passed 4.18.22 (hospice), 2 nights after he passed I was asleep & I heard his voice so clearly telling me in Spanish "Come Honey Let's Go" I woke up so fast hoping to see him thinking he's OK it was a bad dream, he wasn't there but my heart was beating so fast like it was going to burst. I am so mad at myself for waking up, I just know I would've gone with him. I tell him every day to please come back, I'm sorry I woke up. 💔 I'm alone in this world living in my car with zero income & feel invisible.
@@gatitam2875 I wish you didn't feel so alone and I was in the position to help you! Life is hard and even tho I'm married with kids, I feel very alone too. I'll be thinking and praying for you!
My great-aunt died of a broken heart. She and my paternal grandmother were twins. My great-aunt never married and my grandfather died when my dad was 11. So my grandmother and great-aunt not only shared a womb, but also lived together most of their lives. My grandmother died of cancer when she was 85. Six months later my great-aunt died from no apparent cause. She had a vision of my grandmother that she told me about a couple of months before her death. They're buried together.
I did passport care a long time ago and had a couple to take care of, well the wife had a heart attack but I got her back and the ambulance arrived to take her. She passed while we were still there at the hospital (her husband & I) and he cried and asked if I could go to the funeral with him and I told him I would, but I was young, new, sad (I loved them both, and overwhelmed with my first loss and didn't know it was a no no to agree to that. They wouldn't even let me go back over to tell him I couldn't and put someone else with him, I fell apart and quit. I intended to go back but life had other plans for me, now I'm at the point in my own conditions (5 autoimmune diseases) that I might not have much longer. I'm not afraid of death but that I'm alone, TY for being there for them in the end even if just for your beautiful smile and soul. God bless and stay loving & kind!
I was just watching one of your longer videos, the one about how everyone that you’ve taken care of, have always seen someone they know, come to get them. It’s truly incredible, and I hope that sense of knowing gives you some peace. 💞
This made me cry. 😢 This very thing happened with my grandparents. Grandpa passed first.💔 then a month later Grandma passed. I was on the room when gram passed. I told this day am blessed to have witnessed Grandpa come & get her. She had nd moved all at and all of a sudden she acted like she was going to get up and she opened her eyes and said my grandpas name clear as day then she was gone. Thank you so much for what you do. The hospice nurse that my grandparents had was a true angel on earth. She's a bonus part of our family now.❤ sorry this is so long. I just had to share.❤ they were married 73 years.
Beautiful and true! Say, I'm sure you've seen this...and it's another major life lesson: my father was a poor workaholic (only partially due to our severe poverty as a family of 6) and lived most of his adult life planning for all the things he would do when he retired. He had ridiculously great health (let's just say he wouldn't have ever caught any Covid...) and my mother had many non-life threatening health issues and was several sizes overweight her whole adult life. Then, just months after he retired at 62, he started having various strange symptoms that the doctors couldn't figure out what was affecting different things. Long story short, Ma's birthday is June 8th, their 42nd wedding anniversary was the 10th, and Dad died on the 13th (stubborn to not pass near/on those dates) just 10 days after they tentatively diagnosed him, correctly, with CJD. That was almost 17 years ago. Mom had an emergency quadruple bypass almost a year later, but SHE is the one who is still here to have those experiences. We just never know what will happen in life. (Dad even took a single life annuity out on HIMSELF that he had Ma sign without knowing what it was, banking that HE would live much longer than her since he was always so healthy and she wasn't. That money went with him and if Ma's job didn't cover him a little as a spousal coverage, we couldn't have afforded to bury him or pay off the hospital bills! Annuities...Horrible things.)
I wonder if his higher self knew his prognosis and he decided to get out of here while his mind was still healthy. Or maybe it was God. It may have been merciful that he was allowed to pass before the disease took his mind. I'm so sorry for your loss.
My family doesn't care abt me or really each other. I'm dying of a broken heart; I tell my family, but they tell me that's stupid & impossible. So I can't wait to finally be loved & cared abt in heaven, bc its never going to happen here. I talk w/ a few disabled/sick neighbors, & they are in the same boat. Sometimes your independent care giver is the only care you receive & its worth more than its weight in gold❤️💛
I cannot wait for your book, and really wish you had more long stories up on youtube! Your videos have given me a whole new perspective on life/death that is oddly comforting and fascinating. Thank you for sharing these stories.
Thank you for being the kind and compassionate person you are. Your patients are truly blessed because it is definitely not just a job for you. You really connect with your patients and that is truly a gift, especially at the end of life which I feel is the most precious gift you can give someone to die peacefully and without pain and suffering. ❤
I wish you were there for me when Mom passed last Oct. Nurse Naomie was the Angle from Hospice for Dad 5 yrs earlier 2017 for Dad. I guess I thought it would have been the same. It was not. 😢
My grandparents passed a few months apart. They were in a nursing home [my nursing home/job 😭] i saw my grandpa that morning!! About 2 1/2 hours before he passed 😭. I was off the dat grandma passed... I saw her the afternoon, the very afternoon, before she passed. Sadly, I was the only family member that was able to see them daily as i worked there. Treasure the moments... I sure did...❤
Thank you for showing, for demonstrating how we approach death. This one really touched my heart. You are a kind person, Hadley. May God bless you and those you love.
This is how I feel every day since my husband of 42 years died last December 23rd. I had just prepared our home for hospice, and was going to bring him home the next day, but he suddenly passed that morning at 3:30 am. I will never forget the horrible call from the hospital. 😢 We both thought he had at least another two weeks to a month left. I want so bad to go and be with David. We did absolutely everything together. For the first time ever, we are not. I just wish I could just go and be with him. Thats why I watch your vids to learn what the signs are.
I love your videos, but I have to be honest, I cry in every one. I sometimes keep scrolling because I just can’t cry that day, but I always come back to your channel. I just have to be in the right frame of mind. Thank you for all you do. ❤
This was my Nana and Pop. Nana died first, after 60 years married. Pop was simply lost. He stayed with us a few weeks, then lived with my aunt and uncle, but his heart was with her and he went to join her a month or so later.
My in-laws died within a year of each other. My husband and I had lunch with my Mother-in-law a couple of weeks before she died (she was 95) and she told us she was ready to go home. Shortly after that, she died peacefully in her sleep one night. My Mom is now 91 with mild dementia having started about a year ago. Her Mom and 4 of her siblings all had severe dementia and died in nursing homes. I'm determined to keep my Mom at home in her familiar and comfortable surroundings, hiring whatever help is needed and moving in to stay with her around the clock when that becomes necessary. Truthfully, though, I pray that she dies peacefully in her sleep one night, just like my M-I-L, rather than suffer the worsening effects of dementia. Physically, she's amazingly healthy; her doctor says she has the heart of someone 20 years younger! Even at 91, she is still my role model. I could never have found a better mother than her. I am truly blessed to have had all this time with my Mom and to be able to care for her now as she so beautifully cared for me as a child. It's such an honor to repay some bit of the time that she dedicated to raising my sister and me. I'm not saying that any parent adds the time up, totals the sacrifices and presents it as a debt owed once the children are grown and the parents are elderly. I am just saying that, for me, my parents gave me an idyllic childhood, a loving and secure home, guidance, boundaries, ethics and a moral code to learn to form my own opinions and a life long appreciation for seeing the humor in our own foibles, but appreciating the efforts of others especially when a weaker skill was in use. I'm so grateful to have had the parents I had, they were the BEST! I'm sorry I wasn't able to spend this kind of time with my Dad before he died, but I at least have the time with Mom, my best friend.
That broken heart syndrome is real. It's difficult to stay here when you watch your family and friends die. These videos are both poignant and informative. Wonderful content, dear.❤❤
My great grandparents raised me when I was younger (like, 1-8 years old) My great grandmother had asthma and other issues and she died of an asthma attack when I was 7-8 (I'm not sure of the exact date but it was during autumn and that's all I remember) My great grandfather held on without her for several years, and passed when I was 12-13 years old. I remember the date but not my age. He passed from complications of a stroke but we all knew a big factor in it was he was lost without her and kinda just gave up on life when she was gone. These stories make me wish their stories ended in a better way than they did.
You are such a good hospice nurse!! I love your videos!! You are so kind and such a nice person!! And I believe you truly are trying to help The world!!
My stepmom passed two years ago and I now my dad is having heart problems. They we’re together for 30 years. If it wasn’t for us kids I think he would’ve been gone already.
My great-grandma and Great-grandpa passed a few years ago, both within months of each other. They just couldn't bear to be apart for too long - not after so many years together.
i saw a statistic many years ago, when the old couple down the street died within a few months of each other. i dont remember the exact numbers, but a LOT of couple who have been married a long time die within 3 months of each other. its sort of sad and sweet to think about how much love and companionship there can be, and how much people just kind of stop when it goes away.
This was my mom and dad. Mama passed less than a month after her 85th birthday and Daddy left to join her 20 days later. He had been having conversations with her before he went to be with her
When my husbands grandfather passed away he was talking to his grandma at the reception and while they were chatting she had a stroke, the next week we were at her funeral. 😢❤ She couldn’t live without him.
My mom died 2 months exactly after my father . They both lived long healthy full lives and long bed each other deeply . I felt so happy for my mom really . It seemed like a gift and a miracle.
My husband died 4 years ago I was 40 and I wanted to be with him but we had a little one my dream baby she was 9 1/2 when her daddy died I remember being mad at him because he was here for double digits and she was so strong for mommy my dream baby at 13 1/2 is now with her daddy, I what to be with my baby girl she is the love of my life
when my grandpa died he made my grandma promise that she wouldn't end her own life or just give up bc that all counts as sui¢ide and then she wouldn't get into heaven and see him. it sounded kind of like a messed up thing to say on multiple levels when i was a kid, but it worked. she lived almost another 30 years and me and her other grandkids actually got to know her. i'm really grateful she was in our lives for so long
My mom used to be a PCA for a family friend of ares and she’s literally like my second grandma bc she’s known me since I was a little tiny baby and the night she passed me and her grandson both woke up at 2 am saying she’s fine bc she had passed in are dreams and two minutes later my mom had gotten the call that she passed and we just received word that the lady’s mom just passed yesterday
My cousin passed away yesterday in hospice from multiple organ failure from years of excessive drinking and complications from stomach stapling and bizarre diets for the last 10 years. His 48th birthday would have been May 10th.
My grandma passed 08/20 from Pneumonia on top of her small cell lung cancer and my grandpa just passed 03/23. They would’ve been married 49 years in 2020. I’m just glad he wasn’t alone for their 50th and he was able to go to my aunts wedding. The doctors don’t know why he passed but I think it’s because he wanted to be with her again. 2 years, 7 months, and 2 days is the longest they’d been apart since getting married.
Anyone have any questions for a hospice nurse? I’m doing a few videos answering questions this week! ⬇️
Omgoodness! I just seen this after I commented! Lol. When will u b doing this?
How are you able to keep going after seeing so much loss? You truly are a wonderful human
In the end are they always ready to go or do some people fight it?
Advice you’ve received from those passing that you haven’t shared? Negative experiences with family/friends after a patient passes? Worst experience(s)?
Odd/bad odor (breath or otherwise) from the dying and how to remedy for people visiting/sitting close.
I hope that daughter is okay. It must have been super hard to lose both her parents in a matter of months.
Aunt died of cancer on hospice, her ex husband was found dead from cardiac arrest the next week. Rough for my cousin for sure. I like to think he went to go see her once more
It happens a lot with older couples who have been married a long time. My fiance's grandparents went into hospice care together, lying in bed side by side. They died within days of each other.
It is hard but seeing the heartbreak of the one still here is also a really awful experience. Just my personal experience, but there was some relief knowing my beautiful Mom wasn’t in that kind of piercing emotional pain anymore. When you spend multiple decades loving and building a life with someone, I imagine you just want to be with them.
My best friends parents died this way too(dad passed and mom died of a broken heart). Then 3 months ago she lost her sister to cancer. She is a very strong lady but we all have our limits. 😢
My great aunt and uncle died days apart. He died the day of her funeral, which also happened to be their wedding anniversary. So we had her at his funeral. It was a rough week emotionally.
My mom passed away February 1992 and my dad passed February 2008. One time he told me that he never expected to live that long without her. They were sweethearts until the end. He still carried the picture she sent him while he was overseas in WWII in his wallet. What an example they were! I'm so thankful he did though. We were his caretakers for the last 8 years of his life. My children would have missed out on getting to really know him.
OMGOODNESS. This is so so precious. You have a sweet sweet father. May he rest in peace.
@@evelynfrederick Yes, Dad was a fantastic man. He and Mom would hold hands as they went on their daily walks around the small town we lived in. I am truly grateful and blessed by the Lord to have grown up with them as my parents.
Same w/ my grandpa, & I think he stuck around as long as he did after grandma's death bc of Us grandkids; we were all Super Attached to both grandma & grandpa.....he knew that. Miss you guys every day, can't wait to see you again soon❤️❤️❤️
Lovely story!
This is starting to happen to my dad. He is 85 and in general good health for his age but he is slowing down, sleeping more and had a smaller appetite abd experiencing some dementia. He sometimes sees my mom, who passed in 2013, in his dreams. He says she is waiting for him. It makes me a bit sad but also happy that they will be together in the end.
Man. This video hits hard. I was a cna with a lot of end of life patients for a decade, and I've been in a relationship for 15 years and going strong, so I've both seen this first hand and it's one of my biggest fears for myself or my partner later in life. We've been together our entire adult life. If we make it to old age, we won't know how to be alone.
♥️
I won't lie, Druelia, it's rough. But you *can* make it through.
I have survived my wife by ten years so far and if you asked me what happened or what I did for at least the first five years after I lost her I wouldn't be able to tell you much. Grief forms an all encompassing fog over the period; I suspect it might be a self-defence mechanism our minds employ to help us carry on.
From what I learned in the immediate aftermath tho', from both professionals and others who had lost their spouses, if you make it past the first couple of years you are probably going to make it. The pain never goes away but there is a way forward and that is to reignite your life so that your grief is not the only thing in it. Some days I feel like I am just going through the motions of living, waiting for this biological machine to run down so I can be with her again. Those are not good days, as you can imagine. But others are normal enough and, over time, you get more of those.
So hope for the best and do not fear that the worst may come, for there is no sense in spoiling the time you have in the present by a worried anticipation of what might be.
No we wont know how to be alone after all that time. Bless this lady. You can die of a broken heart.
I've 'only' been with my husband for 21 years, and I'm only 45 years old, but I don't know what I would do if something happened to him. I would feel like that, what do I do now?
@@dallassukerkin6878 my grandma once told us… (possibly in the immediate days after the unexpected death of my younger cousin)… that it took her almost 3 years after grandpa’s death before she really, truly cared about how she dressed for leaving the house. Grandma was always a stylish woman, so I’m certain many casual observers noticed, but for her it was more of just “going through the motions” until she made it through the grieving process to when and where she felt fully ready to get on with life.
My grandparents had just celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary less than a month before grandpa passed away. Grandma lived another 31 years, finding purpose in her favorite volunteer positions well into her 90s.
This hits close to home. When my husband died suddenly, I didn't know how to live alone. We'd been together since I was 19. We only had 33 years together. I didn't know how to take care of anything, he always did it. I didn't know how to be a grown up alone. Never blessed with children. I'm all alone now. I'd rather be with him. When the lady said what do I do now... That's what I said too. 😢🤧😭🤧😢
👵☮️🖖
I'm so sorry. 🤗😢
@@dawnmichelle4403 Hi,
Thank you for your sympathy and condolences, it's greatly appreciated.
👵☮️🖖
@@BROUBoomer you're welcome. I pray that the God of all comfort will bring peace to you.
Hello! I don't know why, I just feel compelled to talk to you. I'm 44 yrs. Old and I have been married for 20+ years, and I think of that often. He is still here, but I worry all the time if he goes 1st. I'm not the healthiest of people and I feel sometimes I'm too consumed with death. I wish you didn't feel alone! I would love to talk with you and share stories! I pray you find happiness and friendship very soon!
@@garvy12345 Hi,
Keep up with his medical condition, make sure he gets his check ups, and feed him healthy food, keep healthy snacks around. And tell him you are scared of being left behind.
I didn't. Now here I am living in regret. Take care of yourself too. Eat more broccoli. And save money like you are going to live to be 100 and retire comfortably. My father's 401k nose dived a couple of months before his retirement. He retired with less than half of what he expected. Diversify your money investments. Because of personal disasters I cashed out my pension money so I have nothing coming when I get to retirement age, except social security benefits, and that's not enough to live on.
You don't know what tomorrow brings, but be prepared for every possible disaster. And have your husband teach you how to take care of everything, the car, the house, etcetera. I didn't know what day the trash went out, nothing about the car, etc. I hadn't even pumped gas in over 25 years. I'm a mess, don't be like me. Be prepared. That will help bring some confidence just incase you are left behind when the time comes.
Best wishes, take care, stay safe, have a nice day. 👵☮️🖖
This was my grandparents. They were married 65 years. My grandmom passed January 2019 very unexpectedly. My grandfather passed May 2019. He didn’t know how to live without her. She always made sure he ate and took his meds. He died of a broken heart. He carried her picture in his pocket until he died.
Late reply, but this made me cry. Currently finding care for my grandparents married 65 years in may. They have taken care of each other their whole lives so when one gets worse, the other follows. It’s gut wrenching. Thank you for sharing this, i’ve been struggling to find stories similar to my own and feel lost 😢
@@zacgallenlover911 I am so sorry your facing this. It was heartbreaking to watch unfold. All we could do was be there and do whatever we could to keep him comfortable until he went to be with his “BW” (Beautiful wife) as he called her. Make sure you know where all current Wills are and what their final resting plans are and exactly what they want. It was a huge source of tension when my grandmother suddenly passed when we didn’t have the updated docs and it led to some ugly things with vindictive “family”. Thinking of you and your family in this delicate time. May they both have a wonderful time here and in the afterlife and when their time has come a peaceful transition.
@@ailanisd8594 We already purchased a dual plot 💓 They refuse to be separated. My father is by far the most sensible in the family and has executive control of the will in case “family” wants to lie about things. Thank you so much for the response. The longest they’ve been apart since they met was 2 weeks.
My grandparents passed 4 days apart. They were the epitome of ‘can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em’. They were divorced but had been together 40+ years. My grandfather was diagnosed first with colon cancer. After a year he was on hospice and had someone coming regularly. During that time my grandmother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
She didn’t have the coverage for a nurse, but those sweet women would bring extra stuff and kept my nana comfortable for as long as they could.
It took her swiftly, within 3 weeks. She passed before my grandfather. He came in, sat with her for a while, told my mom his wishes for her funeral, went back to his bed….and just went into a coma. He never woke up again, and he passed 10 minutes after her viewings ended. Spending nights over there, helping with things, I heard my grandmother calling him.
I swear she was waiting for him…
My ex husbands grandparents were placed in a home care facility together. Not a nursing home, the type where it is run by an RN and a staff in a residential house. They were able to be in the same room and spend their days together. Grandpa Miles passed first and less than two weeks later Grandma Lois passed of a broken heart. They had been married almost 75 years if you can believe it. This was back in the early 90's and boy did they have a story to tell of how they got married. They were special people. Just like you Nurse Hadley! Thank you for helping people understand how important hospice care is!
Can we hear the story of how they got married please?
@@steve7006 Lois was 16. Miles was 18. He got called up to fight in WW1. He wanted her to be his wife but her parents would not have it. So they drove to the next county over and got married by the justice of the peace in secret. He shipped out and she went about her life. Getting his letters from the western front about a month after he wrote them. They were redacted and checked, lest they be giving up information they shouldn't. She still had those letters in a box when we cleaned out the house. He was gone for just over a year almost the entirety of the time the U.S. was involved in the war. He was a soldier in the army in the fox holes and the trenches. When he returned, he showed up on her doorstep and when her father answered, Miles boldly exclaimed, "I'm here to get my wife!" to which her confused father replied, "What do you mean your wife? You are not married!" It was then that he produced the certificate. Lois was standing behind her father, who was a very tall and burly man, dressed in her Sunday best, suitcase in hand, and hat on her head, ready to go off with her husband. He spent the next several months building her a house that still stands on the family homestead in the town that their respective families helped to found. I felt privileged to know them both. I hope I get to see them in heaven because they were some of the best people! They had a love story for the ages.
@@noreenskitchenchannelThank you for sharing that. It was beautiful to read.💜
How beautiful! Thank you for sharing their story.
So beautiful sounds like movie the notebook
I am not a hospice nurse, but my grandpa was on hospice and while his nurse would come and visit and check on him and talk to me, I did the primary care taking while my mom worked. I'm glad he passed. No more pain. He was 91 and passed the week after Thanksgiving last year.
Very similar to my grandpa❤
I’m over crying. This happened to my grandparents. My grandfather passed in January. My grandmother went to be with him only 15 weeks later. They were married for almost 70 years. Two weeks before she passed, she told my mom that my grandfather came to see her and brought her a hot dog and stayed to chat.
I took care of a husband and wife as a hospice nurse. Both had dementia. He died right there in their bed while she sang songs to him. She died about 2 weeks later because she just couldn’t function anymore. She became even more confused without him there.
Both of my parents were under hospice at the same time. They both had cancer. My mom passed away followed by my dad 6 months later. As their primary caregiver I couldn’t have done it without hospice.
Not a hospice nurse (and not a hospice story) but I worked in a hospital with a cardiac surgeon who always wanted to be paged immediately if one of his patients said they were going to die. He didn’t care if everything looked good- he wanted to know if they said that and he would always come and do a work up to see what was going on.
Thank you so much for this. I've always been terrified of death (my parents, my husband, my own) and no matter who it is- distant family, close loved ones..... it ALWAYS hits me sooooo hard. Slightly over a year ago, we lost my hubby's uncle, (60+y.o.) whom we were very close to, to a bad fall. I still have not recovered from it.
About a week ago, we lost my hubby's 2nd cousin (23y.o.) to a bad motorcycle accident. He was cut off by a 70+y.o. man who just pulled out in front of him. 57mph to 0mph in an instant. Ironically, he was a motorcycle instructor. We met him only once but it still hit/hits me soooo hard...
My 81y.o. father is looking at open chest & lung surgery just as soon as they can control his Afib.
I'm trying to prepare myself but it's soooooo hard.....
Thank you for all that you do.
I appreciate it sooooo much!
This is obviously really really sad, but I also think it's extremely beautiful. To love someone so much, even after 50 years that you are unable to part from them. Maybe it's just because one set of my grandparents divorced over a decade ago (and were never really visibly loving in front of us grandkids) and the other set has been married 55 years exactly today and I don't know that I've ever seen a more miserable couple where abuse was not involved. THAT is incredibly tragic to me. To continue to be married to someone you clearly detest (at least from my gma, my gpa definitely loves his wife, he just is a bit of an asshole and enjoys picking on her).
All that to say: I love seeing people who stayed together because they LOVED each other dearly not out of convenience or whatever other reason my grandparents are still together.
I had a female patient who passed, I think it was on a weekend. Within 72 hours her husband was gone. My father in law managed to last about a year after my mother in law. My mom went on the exact same day as my dad 25 years later. December 9th.
This was my parents. My dad passed January 2022 and mom 14 months to the day later. I honestly was surprised she waited that long. She was heartbroken 💔 and now we are
The same happened to my aunt’s godparents. Her godfather died because of an illness he’d had for a long time. At the funeral, she didn’t her godmother, thought that she must be on the toilet or at the front. When a speaker came up, they told everyone in the church that the wife, who had some health issues, but nothing really major, died just a few days after her husband did.
This is beautiful. Thank You for everything you do for people and for understanding their needs. I was raised by my Grandparents, they were married 63 years and I know they were Soulmates. They were always so happy together. I even remember going grocery shopping with them when I was a little kid and they would sing together the entire car ride there. When my Grandma passed on in Jan 2007, she was 83 and I was sure my Grandpa would pass soon after because he loved her so much. I was so surprised that he lived another 6.5 years without her. But I think he stayed around for us (his Family - 2 daughters and 2 granddaughters) because we all still needed him, I know I did. He passed on in June 2013 at the age of 88. When he passed on, I was in the hospital room with him and I felt 2 feelings, one was happiness for him because he was finally free of an aging body that no longer worked and reunited with my Grandma but the other feeling was intense sadness for myself because I knew how much I was going to miss him. It's been almost 10 years but I still miss him so much but I am Forever Grateful my Grandparents raised me, they gave me such a great childhood which gave me a great foundation for Life. And in 2017 when I was going through a very rough time in my Life, my Grandma visited me in a dream, it was so real, I know it had to be a visitation dream, she told me how much she loved me and it helped me get through that rough time. Thank You again for everything you do for people and believing them when they talk about their loved ones coming to get them. You do such important work in this Life.
My grandfather passed 13 days after my grandmother. He wasn’t ill until she passed. I know they had a blessed reunion. 💝✨💝
When I took nursing in high school it was a couple that shared a room and she was better off then him, but we come in to help clean them up and get dressed for the day. She would have us just sit down and talk to her as she got him ready. She felt like it was her place to do for her husband while she still could. They were the sweetest couple and told her great grandson about me that's how we became friends in school.
There's a couple of couples I've seen that I thought were super sweet w/ each other. There's other couples that absolutely hate each other. Memory care is a bit rougher... there this 1 guy who wants to leave this 1 lady everyday. .. hes always trying to get me to make her scadaddle. He to her is her "husband"... I've never dealt w/ a hospice couple tho. I try to vent to my ex mother in law about things. Bc idk how ppl can fall asleep in any type of medical, health care type place. I don't think I'm that creeped out, I guess I'm just weirded out. By like stranger ghosts. Like in short, idk ur story. I'm sorry. Hi but also bye.
My parents passed away within 15 months of each other. They were only 60 and 61, married 29 yrs. My dad had had strokes at age 50 so my mom was his caregiver. But when she got cancer and died first, it was just too hard on my dad. We all tried hard to help him, and he tried really hard, too! He wanted to be there for the grandkids! But some circumstances just didn’t work out and he ended up with pneumonia and officially passed away from that. But we all know it was from a broken heart. One of the hardest things was seeing my mom’s casket in the ground a second time bc the bulldozer dug a little too close to it for my dad’s casket. So weird. But we were able then to do the headstone all at once. I have 3 siblings and we were all in our 20’s and very busy and trying to coordinate with my dad about the headstone and waiting on life insurance and paying for mom’s funeral all took a long time and then dad was sick too. But it’s all done now. It will be 13 yrs on April 29 since my mom passed and then 12 yrs on Sept 19 for my Dad. This is why I enjoy this channel. My mom was on hospice care for a little awhile, although not really at home, but in a hospital unit that little intervention for the last 3 days. And my dad was in a nursing home, supposedly in rehab, when he got ill. And I was with them both in their last moments. And I’ve heard of lots of people’s stories sitting with their loved ones. It fascinates me, especially bc I’m a Christian and I know where my parents are and I know where most of my family are going, to be in Heaven with Jesus. The process itself still scares me though. Your channel is so soothing and full of comfort though. And I LOVE hospice nurses. They have the hugest hearts. Thank you for what you do!
I have been watching you because my grandfather was put in hospice to prepare. But when you said she knows she is going to die made me remember when my friend in high school who was a freshman and I was a junior kept saying she was going to die within 3 months she was gone! The weird thing was she had a lot of peace about it she got in a car accident and passed instantaneously! I think sometimes people just know.
I have experienced this a few times I had a 90 year old in rehab kept telling me she was going to "die" that day low and behold I was in the chanderoom at the end of shift and heard the first code blue at that rehab in over 25 years 😮
Just like this lady, my mom died of a broken heart. The hospice staff went above and beyond to help our family ❤
My granddad just passed earlier this week and I worry for my grandmother. I can't remember exactly how long they were together but it must have been over 60 years. I'm going to miss him. I hope he's in a better place.
My grandma waited a whole life to reunite with grandpa. She made sure her 7 kids and her grandchildren were set and then decided she wanted to go, no use being in pain anymore, everyone had settled down and she was ready for the next adventure.
This video hits me hard. My grandparents died exactly three months apart, same day. My grandpa went last but he was with a terminal illness. He said he wouldn't leave her alone. After she's gobe, he always says he was giving us just enough time. ❤😢
My father had the best hospice team in 2020. He died at home and my mother felt so supported. They were able to celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary before he died. She just celebrated her 85th birthday.
Omg I love your vids
Thank you! ♥️
My dad just passed in march, my parents have been in eachother lives since they were 14 and 15. Together 57 years, married for 54 and 7 months. I'm so glad my mom has me and my siblings and all her grandchildren. We've been trying to keep her going, and she seems pretty content for now. She had all of her kids here for mothers day for the first time in over 20 years (2 live out of state).
Happened to my grandpa. He had a small tumor in his lung for years. My grandma died in January. My grandpa died in June. The tumor had literally grew out of his lung, around his heart & it choked off the heart function. He died peacefully. He really died when grandma did. It’s just that some parts took longer than others.
My mom was in hospice for a year and a half. She wouldn't leave until I gave her my o k that I would be all right. The best part was I had heard to help me grieve for her loss and hencourage for me. And I was blessed to be with her when she passed. And be with my dad when he passed
Mom in hospice. Thank you. Helps me to help her.
My dad passed in March of 2019. My mom had taken care of him for a long time at home and then for 4 months at the hospital: she was there from morning until night every single day. Even the nurses said they had never seen anyone as dedicated and selfless as my mom. A little more than a year later my mom found out she was terminally ill. I took care of her in my home for 8 month period following her diagnosis. She passed in March 2021, one day before the anniv of my dad’s passing. The nurses that came to the house and the doctor were so wonderful. The doctor: I’ve never known a doctor to take so much time with a patient and work so hard to address needs. I was able to text or call her anytime if I needed her. I had to give the nurses such credit. I would often break down crying, mostly the last week and they were so kind and patient with me. I have ptsd from the experience but I would do it again. It was very important to me to be there for my mom and it was so important for her not to be in a hospital. I still held out hope that she would get better, right up until the end. I think without that hope I wouldn’t have been able to cope with it.
My grandma died after over 18 months of struggling with pancreatic cancer. She held on so long for my grandpa. They loved each other so much. He had prostate cancer, and Alzheimer's. After my grandmas death he moved a state over with my uncle who I have no doubt took great care of him. My grandpa kept asking where his wife was. I don't think they told the truth everytime, because everytime they did all those memories, pain, and mourning washed over him anew. They died just a month or 2 apart. I think it was more the grief and longing then any of the other health complications. Health wise he could have gone 6 more months at the very least. We know they're happily reunited, but we still miss them. My daughter was born over 3 years afterwards and was named in part after that grandma
Tears for Mary. God bless.
Two days after we buried my grandfather and all of my family went back to their home, my grandmother passed. We all knew she passed from a broken heart.
My husband of 36 yrs passed 4.18.22 (hospice), 2 nights after he passed I was asleep & I heard his voice so clearly telling me in Spanish "Come Honey Let's Go" I woke up so fast hoping to see him thinking he's OK it was a bad dream, he wasn't there but my heart was beating so fast like it was going to burst. I am so mad at myself for waking up, I just know I would've gone with him. I tell him every day to please come back, I'm sorry I woke up. 💔
I'm alone in this world living in my car with zero income & feel invisible.
So sorry you're experiencing that. ❤
@@amys.6673 your reply alone helps, there is somebody out there that can see/hear me. Ty
@@gatitam2875 I wish you didn't feel so alone and I was in the position to help you! Life is hard and even tho I'm married with kids, I feel very alone too. I'll be thinking and praying for you!
@@garvy12345 Thank you for your kind words.
My great-aunt died of a broken heart. She and my paternal grandmother were twins. My great-aunt never married and my grandfather died when my dad was 11. So my grandmother and great-aunt not only shared a womb, but also lived together most of their lives. My grandmother died of cancer when she was 85. Six months later my great-aunt died from no apparent cause. She had a vision of my grandmother that she told me about a couple of months before her death. They're buried together.
I did passport care a long time ago and had a couple to take care of, well the wife had a heart attack but I got her back and the ambulance arrived to take her. She passed while we were still there at the hospital (her husband & I) and he cried and asked if I could go to the funeral with him and I told him I would, but I was young, new, sad (I loved them both, and overwhelmed with my first loss and didn't know it was a no no to agree to that. They wouldn't even let me go back over to tell him I couldn't and put someone else with him, I fell apart and quit. I intended to go back but life had other plans for me, now I'm at the point in my own conditions (5 autoimmune diseases) that I might not have much longer. I'm not afraid of death but that I'm alone, TY for being there for them in the end even if just for your beautiful smile and soul. God bless and stay loving & kind!
I was just watching one of your longer videos, the one about how everyone that you’ve taken care of, have always seen someone they know, come to get them. It’s truly incredible, and I hope that sense of knowing gives you some peace. 💞
This made me cry. 😢 This very thing happened with my grandparents. Grandpa passed first.💔 then a month later Grandma passed. I was on the room when gram passed. I told this day am blessed to have witnessed Grandpa come & get her. She had nd moved all at and all of a sudden she acted like she was going to get up and she opened her eyes and said my grandpas name clear as day then she was gone. Thank you so much for what you do. The hospice nurse that my grandparents had was a true angel on earth. She's a bonus part of our family now.❤ sorry this is so long. I just had to share.❤ they were married 73 years.
Beautiful and true!
Say, I'm sure you've seen this...and it's another major life lesson: my father was a poor workaholic (only partially due to our severe poverty as a family of 6) and lived most of his adult life planning for all the things he would do when he retired. He had ridiculously great health (let's just say he wouldn't have ever caught any Covid...) and my mother had many non-life threatening health issues and was several sizes overweight her whole adult life. Then, just months after he retired at 62, he started having various strange symptoms that the doctors couldn't figure out what was affecting different things. Long story short, Ma's birthday is June 8th, their 42nd wedding anniversary was the 10th, and Dad died on the 13th (stubborn to not pass near/on those dates) just 10 days after they tentatively diagnosed him, correctly, with CJD. That was almost 17 years ago.
Mom had an emergency quadruple bypass almost a year later, but SHE is the one who is still here to have those experiences.
We just never know what will happen in life. (Dad even took a single life annuity out on HIMSELF that he had Ma sign without knowing what it was, banking that HE would live much longer than her since he was always so healthy and she wasn't. That money went with him and if Ma's job didn't cover him a little as a spousal coverage, we couldn't have afforded to bury him or pay off the hospital bills! Annuities...Horrible things.)
I wonder if his higher self knew his prognosis and he decided to get out of here while his mind was still healthy. Or maybe it was God. It may have been merciful that he was allowed to pass before the disease took his mind. I'm so sorry for your loss.
My family doesn't care abt me or really each other. I'm dying of a broken heart; I tell my family, but they tell me that's stupid & impossible. So I can't wait to finally be loved & cared abt in heaven, bc its never going to happen here. I talk w/ a few disabled/sick neighbors, & they are in the same boat. Sometimes your independent care giver is the only care you receive & its worth more than its weight in gold❤️💛
🩷💗🕊 I care. I hope you are finding some love in your life NOW, Dear One. 🥲🌈❤️✨️
I cannot wait for your book, and really wish you had more long stories up on youtube! Your videos have given me a whole new perspective on life/death that is oddly comforting and fascinating. Thank you for sharing these stories.
My mom knew . She was so happy too.
Thank you for being the kind and compassionate person you are. Your patients are truly blessed because it is definitely not just a job for you. You really connect with your patients and that is truly a gift, especially at the end of life which I feel is the most precious gift you can give someone to die peacefully and without pain and suffering. ❤
I wish you were there for me when Mom passed last Oct. Nurse Naomie was the Angle from Hospice for Dad 5 yrs earlier 2017 for Dad. I guess I thought
it would have been the same. It was not. 😢
My grandparents passed a few months apart. They were in a nursing home [my nursing home/job 😭] i saw my grandpa that morning!! About 2 1/2 hours before he passed 😭.
I was off the dat grandma passed... I saw her the afternoon, the very afternoon, before she passed. Sadly, I was the only family member that was able to see them daily as i worked there. Treasure the moments... I sure did...❤
Love all ur videos. I frequently struggle to understand which character is what. Ty 4 all the work, thought, love you put into each video
Tears. This is so much what this daughter needs to hear and share with her mom right now.❤
You are such a great and beautiful person. You are truly Blessed❤
Thank you for showing, for demonstrating how we approach death. This one really touched my heart. You are a kind person, Hadley. May God bless you and those you love.
Very bittersweet. Sad and beautiful at the same time! 😭
You're so kind
This one got me in the feels😢❤
This is how I feel every day since my husband of 42 years died last December 23rd. I had just prepared our home for hospice, and was going to bring him home the next day, but he suddenly passed that morning at 3:30 am. I will never forget the horrible call from the hospital. 😢 We both thought he had at least another two weeks to a month left. I want so bad to go and be with David. We did absolutely everything together. For the first time ever, we are not. I just wish I could just go and be with him. Thats why I watch your vids to learn what the signs are.
I love your videos, but I have to be honest, I cry in every one. I sometimes keep scrolling because I just can’t cry that day, but I always come back to your channel. I just have to be in the right frame of mind. Thank you for all you do. ❤
Words can't describe how needed your videos are. Thank you for sharing all of these stories. You're a wonderful human being. 🩷🩵🩷🩵
This was my Nana and Pop. Nana died first, after 60 years married. Pop was simply lost. He stayed with us a few weeks, then lived with my aunt and uncle, but his heart was with her and he went to join her a month or so later.
My in-laws died within a year of each other. My husband and I had lunch with my Mother-in-law a couple of weeks before she died (she was 95) and she told us she was ready to go home. Shortly after that, she died peacefully in her sleep one night. My Mom is now 91 with mild dementia having started about a year ago. Her Mom and 4 of her siblings all had severe dementia and died in nursing homes. I'm determined to keep my Mom at home in her familiar and comfortable surroundings, hiring whatever help is needed and moving in to stay with her around the clock when that becomes necessary. Truthfully, though, I pray that she dies peacefully in her sleep one night, just like my M-I-L, rather than suffer the worsening effects of dementia. Physically, she's amazingly healthy; her doctor says she has the heart of someone 20 years younger! Even at 91, she is still my role model. I could never have found a better mother than her. I am truly blessed to have had all this time with my Mom and to be able to care for her now as she so beautifully cared for me as a child. It's such an honor to repay some bit of the time that she dedicated to raising my sister and me. I'm not saying that any parent adds the time up, totals the sacrifices and presents it as a debt owed once the children are grown and the parents are elderly. I am just saying that, for me, my parents gave me an idyllic childhood, a loving and secure home, guidance, boundaries, ethics and a moral code to learn to form my own opinions and a life long appreciation for seeing the humor in our own foibles, but appreciating the efforts of others especially when a weaker skill was in use. I'm so grateful to have had the parents I had, they were the BEST! I'm sorry I wasn't able to spend this kind of time with my Dad before he died, but I at least have the time with Mom, my best friend.
That broken heart syndrome is real. It's difficult to stay here when you watch your family and friends die.
These videos are both poignant and informative. Wonderful content, dear.❤❤
as a spiritual person, i'm always deeply touched by your videos ❤💪🏻🙏
This is hard. Breaks my heart
My great grandparents raised me when I was younger (like, 1-8 years old)
My great grandmother had asthma and other issues and she died of an asthma attack when I was 7-8 (I'm not sure of the exact date but it was during autumn and that's all I remember)
My great grandfather held on without her for several years, and passed when I was 12-13 years old. I remember the date but not my age. He passed from complications of a stroke but we all knew a big factor in it was he was lost without her and kinda just gave up on life when she was gone.
These stories make me wish their stories ended in a better way than they did.
This makes me soo happy, but hurts at the same time
You are such a good hospice nurse!! I love your videos!! You are so kind and such a nice person!! And I believe you truly are trying to help The world!!
Hi...I had that exact thing happen to me when I worker as an RN case manager in hospice. They always know❤
My stepmom passed two years ago and I now my dad is having heart problems. They we’re together for 30 years. If it wasn’t for us kids I think he would’ve been gone already.
My great-grandma and Great-grandpa passed a few years ago, both within months of each other. They just couldn't bear to be apart for too long - not after so many years together.
I’ve yet to take care of a rebounding hospice patient. Would be nice to enjoy them again before actually passing! Esp for the family.
i saw a statistic many years ago, when the old couple down the street died within a few months of each other. i dont remember the exact numbers, but a LOT of couple who have been married a long time die within 3 months of each other.
its sort of sad and sweet to think about how much love and companionship there can be, and how much people just kind of stop when it goes away.
This was my mom and dad. Mama passed less than a month after her 85th birthday and Daddy left to join her 20 days later. He had been having conversations with her before he went to be with her
When my husbands grandfather passed away he was talking to his grandma at the reception and while they were chatting she had a stroke, the next week we were at her funeral. 😢❤ She couldn’t live without him.
That's amazing!
My mom died 2 months exactly after my father . They both lived long healthy full lives and long bed each other deeply . I felt so happy for my mom really . It seemed like a gift and a miracle.
My husband died 4 years ago I was 40 and I wanted to be with him but we had a little one my dream baby she was 9 1/2 when her daddy died I remember being mad at him because he was here for double digits and she was so strong for mommy my dream baby at 13 1/2 is now with her daddy, I what to be with my baby girl she is the love of my life
Well now I'm in tears. 💔
when my grandpa died he made my grandma promise that she wouldn't end her own life or just give up bc that all counts as sui¢ide and then she wouldn't get into heaven and see him. it sounded kind of like a messed up thing to say on multiple levels when i was a kid, but it worked. she lived almost another 30 years and me and her other grandkids actually got to know her. i'm really grateful she was in our lives for so long
That would be so sad for the daughter to loose both parents so close together. I have heard this happens sometimes, though.
Made me cry
Bless you
My friend’s parents died on the same day, just a couple hours apart. They didn’t want to be without each other.
Seen this quite often in my nursing career also.
Not me bawling my eyes out
My dad knew he wouldn't make it through January. He died Jan 9 this year. We lost Mom last February. He was so lonely without her.
My mom used to be a PCA for a family friend of ares and she’s literally like my second grandma bc she’s known me since I was a little tiny baby and the night she passed me and her grandson both woke up at 2 am saying she’s fine bc she had passed in are dreams and two minutes later my mom had gotten the call that she passed and we just received word that the lady’s mom just passed yesterday
Same with my Grandparents, 4 months apart after 60 years of marriage
My cousin passed away yesterday in hospice from multiple organ failure from years of excessive drinking and complications from stomach stapling and bizarre diets for the last 10 years. His 48th birthday would have been May 10th.
I’m so sorry Sarah. Sending so much love ♥️
I just pre ordered your book for my mom. she is taking care of her mom who had brain surgery almost two years ago.
Yep. Everytime.
My great aunt and great uncle passed in hospice within 3 hours of each other
This was exactly what happened to my Grandmother she went exactly a month and a day after my Grandfather
My grandma passed 08/20 from Pneumonia on top of her small cell lung cancer and my grandpa just passed 03/23. They would’ve been married 49 years in 2020. I’m just glad he wasn’t alone for their 50th and he was able to go to my aunts wedding. The doctors don’t know why he passed but I think it’s because he wanted to be with her again. 2 years, 7 months, and 2 days is the longest they’d been apart since getting married.
My daddy died of a broken heart 💔 after my mom died he loved my mom probably more than she loved him. He just wanted to be with her in heaven
yeah knew that was going to happen. any time a client suddenly "gets better" its the end of time for them
This killed me because my dad died exactly 5 weeks after my mom did. They were married for 43 years 😭😭😭😭😭
When my husband died I actually developed broken heart syndrome. I was ready to die. For some reason I'm still here.