STOP BLAMING WOMEN FOR YOUR LACK OF INITIATIVE. Its for sure lack of self esteem after a bad breakup. I speak from experience. I was very confident from 18-20. After my breakup I started spiraling downward and I would just game at home. I would go out but I wouldn't speak too much. Im 30 now and I'm back out there. There will always be shitty people. Women and Men. You blaming women and not taking initiative to get out of that mindset is whats holding you back. Get out there, up your communication skills, be yourself but improve yourself and watch it just happen naturally.
That take is actually a little shallow. When women are not comfortable in their skin, everybody sympathizes with them. If a man is not comfortable in his skin, it's his problem... Why is that exactly? The answer: because women don't think it's attractive... Women need to change their standards. Men are expected to change their standards for women, but not women for men... That is the whole problem in the first.
Saying it's women's fault won't do you any good and is also not remotely true. Who told you that women don't want a man who knows where he is at and is comfortable with their strengths and weaknesses? Plus, saying they should lower their standards is just sad because what are you even referring to? You see men who aren't the best looking or rich being in relationships because they are true to themselves
I'll translate that for the next guy who reads this; "Don't try to be something you're not." And once you really start digging deep into that you realize that you do a whole lot of things based on fear, shame and/or assumptions, which ultimately means you're not being yourself. I also believe the woman in the video said "find your true self," not "be yourself." There's a difference there, as a lot of people will swear up and down that they're "being themselves," despite constantly letting fear, shame and assumptions they pulled out of their behinds control them. Take it from someone who went through all that crap - your mind can and will bend your perception of reality to fit your current beliefs. It will also blatantly lie to you to maintain status quo, telling you you're doing nothing wrong and that it's the world's fault things don't turn out the way you want.
Just sitting there and being yourself getts you nowhere in Life. At least if you're a man. Men have to become someone that provides value. Women are just born with their value. Women can afford to just be their "Boring Selves." Women can afford to not live in REALITY. Women can afford to just show up to a date, not pay for her food, even though she makes 6 figures, and still bring NOTHING to the table in a relationship. Do you know why, becuz women don't offer any utility outside of sex.... And yett we still end up loving them and providing for them. But a woman will only love a man, under the condition that he PROVIDES VALUE. And women can still DIVORCE a man even who he had provided all of said Value. Becuz society has convinced men to lett them. Life is not about being yourself, it's about being the best. "It's survival of the fittest." Not survival of the selves. @@Gnomleif
Some of us really have nothing to offer ,I'm working to stay afloat, I have to live with my parents because they're old and I'm there only son ,can't afford to hire someone to take care of them ,it isn't financially feasible. Living with your parents is a major turn off for almost all girls ,none would even listen as to why I live with them ,it isn't worth trying anymore because the moment she finds out I live with my parents I'm ghosted asap . also I'm not rich ,I'm bearly affording to eat . I'll just live with my parents cause they're the only family I have .
And here I am openly bragging to my students that I live with my parents as a way to show I have no expenses and thus more money. I also care for my parents and have rid ourselves of rent payments due to investing. By the way most under 30s lives with their parents.
@@FreeloadingBird2584 girl will walk out on you ,the first time they hear you live with your parents, it crazy ,they expect a person in there 20s to have a mansion and own a few cars ,lol.
What? You need to get outside your tiny little circle. I was with my boyfriend for 7 years before we moved in together, we both lived with our parents in our 20s. I know countless other couples that have done the same. Just because you’ve had a few experiences of women not liking you living with your parents, it doesn’t mean “almost all girls” don’t like it, not even remotely. You’re stuck in your own self made bubble.
@Richard-zz7gm You’re 100% correct. Then because they’ve watched those videos, more similar ones will be suggested which then warps their view that their experience and beliefs are more common than they actually are in real life. But it’s comfortable to them to stay in their bubble, ignorance is bliss I guess?
That's a great saying "be yourself" yet the second you get with a girl all they do is try and change you. That's what the problem is. If men try to change a girl he's controlling, yet when it's reversed and it's a woman changing the man it's love and empowering.
That's a nuanced subject. If a woman is trying to form you into some pissant who she can control for her own benefit, that's toxic. However, men need women who will help them become better through love, and that's what a healthy relationship is based on. Men can do the same for their wives, but generally a wife does that the best.
To all the invisible homies! I'm with ya'll, I've missed many chances because I always deemed myself not good enough and that there's always someone better out there for the. You need to realise that you gotta love yourself truely and honestly first before you can have someone else love you. Having a single mother that put most of her needs first I definitely have problems with putting my needs first so this is why I'm single and avoiding women. Best of luck to homies!
I just dont like lazy women. If a woman is interested in me and says nothing, thats a her problem. We start to not worry if we're good enough for women by refusing to play women's games
Men do sexualy abuse women though. Men need to start getting really angry about the losers who do these things because it's ruining it for everyone else.
Then they complain why less men approach them, while they have the power to call sexual harrasment on you approaching her respectfully asking her out and all the simps belive it then.
@@Que_te_mporta1 You obviously didnt get my comment. Other ppl being rude for no reason is to blame on them and not on me. "be yourself" is still bs-advice. I did take action, i stopped dating and i stopped asking women out, so keep your advices to yourself, nobody asked for it.
@@Austria002and that surely made you more unhappy. You talk about been rude but here you are been rude. I don't know who hurt you, but is clear you need to work on yourself. Making up excuses and ignoring the problem won't help you at all. Is clear you have self-esteem issues. You can't control what other people do or say, but you can decide how to react.
The problem isn't that men aren't taking the right approach, the problem is that a man could literally do everything right and still fail simply because the woman was in a bad mood or was busy or just wasn't feeling it or just plain wasn't attracted or a million other things. You keep saying how men need to do things differently but women are making it abundantly clear that whatever the man does is completely irrelevant.
@@WillieFungo it’s more nuanced than that. High value men have a lot of power in the dating world! Even Mid tier guys can have quite a bit of power if they know how to play the game. The guys in the bottom 30 or so percent have no power though I agree.
@@brianmeen2158 But everyone already knows this. Chad doesn't need to watch her channel for advice. By default, this message is going out to the guys without as much power.
Its not about lack of confidence, the problem is women want perfection when it comes to a relationship, we really try to do our best but the minute we make a mistake, they leave because its so easy for a woman to run and find someone "better". Thats why so many of us are single. Becuase we are exhausted of trying to make ends meet.
Yup they expect us to have the four 6s of perfection and have the perfect flirting skills, social skills and charisma. Yet the moment they see a flaw in any of those, or think we're too "needy", they get the "ick".
@@aw-2130 exactly what happened to me. My ex told me she got the "ick" cuz apparently making an average income + giving English classes on the side isn't stable or good enough. It's been 2 months and i still can't help but feel devastated from her disrespecting me.
@@josephiglesias2986what happened to you can be a blessing, and it simply means that she's not the one for you, and vice-versa. I have 2 financially successful friends who admit that their spouse would not have given them the time of day in college nor at the beginning of their careers. It's not necessarily bad, but would u rather a person who would sees and sticks with you as you better yourself, or someone who only notices you at the finish line of your cadence -- like my aforementioned buddies? Keep in mind that there is no right or wrong answer here as it depends on the individuals in question, and the hands dealt with in life. My buddies would rather their statement not be true, but alas. However, they do have other things that they admire in their spouse that are important to them, so it balances this out for them.
Women are gifted with what men desire in early adulthood & mature accordingly. Men must earn attraction. Do you want fake confidence & arrogance or someone genuine? Most men won't obtain confidence until their late 20s or early 30s after obtaining some accomplishments. They've earned & deserve their pride. Then suddenly all the women start noticing the young developed man vs the boy of his teens & 20s. This is bc you women all determine who is worthy to even speak to you. We hear a lot about how hard school is for women socially but seldom a thought for our young boys struggles. Why would the ignored & neglected have confidence? Women saying this stuff to men is the peak silopsism. You aren't experiencing the world as a man. Men must earn their value so stop pretending it's easy for them to just assume it. For men confidence comes from accomplishment not simply existing. So in essence you're telling men to act as women. I'm 43 & until very recently that has been the answer given to men... Act like women isn't an answer men need. They instead need to act as men.
That's just it. Why and how is it that guys who have little to offer have so much confidence? Are they just delusional? And women would rather experience delusional confidence than...anything else?
@@garrettduffy515Those young men (who btw are delusional and of course they are the minority of the elite 5%) are attractive only to young and inexperienced (usually bellow 22 years old) women. After that age the game changes a lot. Women start to find a real man...
i think i understand what you're saying, but I think true confidence comes from being okay with yourself even without having accomplished anything great. having a good healthy relationship with yourself lets you be confident at any age. a good example of this is kids. Some kids are the most confident human beings you'll meet and it's not because it's fake or they are just dumb, but they are just happy being themselves and dont compare with what they "could be". with this confidence and seeing women as other individuals, people can be attractive. it is hard to do this of course if you feel you dont have anything about yourself besides accomplishments. wish you all the best!
I was one of those 25 and single men although I did get a gf around that time. The issue is there is this cycle of insecurity that happens with us men. We will experience rejection which hurts our self esteem, and that makes future rejections more likely. The only way of breaking this is to somehow ignore your past trauma and convince yourself that you are a worthwhile man. But it is very difficult to do that. And it is even harder when you see men around you also getting rejection. Like consider, for a second, that you said all of these men were attractive. But imagine if they all knew each other. Well is it possible to imagine them sharing their experiences, and then collectively coming to the conclusion that they are all in fact unnattractive? You see them from your world, but we see ourselves in our world. And our world has different rules.
I’m like that too and I’m a girl I’m doing revisions by Neville Goddard I’m really bad with rejection. I am personally saving up for plastic surgery so that I can feel a lot more confident get my hair dyed blonde and work out every day for two hours.
My recommendation is to pick activities with potential of meeting people, but will also build you as a person whether you meet someone or not. Let's take gym, cooking lessons, dancing lessons, and joining a local entrepreneur group for example. Gym: potential of meeting people is low, but we can't deny the + of building your body and being healthy. Cooking lessons: possibility of meeting a person varies, but have u ever met a woman who didn't like a guy who can cook? Plus, this can save you serious money from eating out. It will also help u stay true to your diet for that hard work you're putting at the gym Dancing lessons: potential to meet people is quite high. This will also help build confidence with women as you are meeting then in an intimate yet not necessarily romantic setting. This is will also help with people to people interaction -- outside of a screen. Also, women in ballroom dancing clubs (salsa, chacha, etc...) are a lot more chillax than the ones in pop clubs. No pickup lines or Rico suave necessary to break the ice. Just ask for a dance, and let the dance be your Ice breaker. Entrepreneur group: probability of meeting people (for romantic) purposes: low. However, you will see the world in a different light, and may end up improving your earning potential. Now, do you see how each one of these activities still end up being a win even if no romantic partners come out of them? I mean do u know a lot girls who wouldn't at least be curious about a guy who can cook, dance, stays healthy, while trying to maximize his earning? Keep in mind that those are just a few examples. I recommend u pick something that you're genuinely interested in, so that you can suck with it, and be truthful about its potential. For instance, videogames are a whole lot of fun, but how does it compare to the aforementioned activities in terms of growth and usefulness? Last but not least, try to stick with the activity, which you will anyway if you genuinely enjoy it, even if you find someone. This will help balance you as a person, and not have the relationship be your life. I also heard women like a guy with passions other than her 😆
@@Alicia-vq8jg Do not change a damn thing about yourself!!!!! going to the gym is cool because you don't want to be an old person in the future who can barely move, but trust me when I tell you, you are perfect just the way you are
What is the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result. What is the definition of Madness? Changing _Everything,_ and STILL getting the exact same result.
It's lack of confidence for them. Men are being told they're not enough, that they're widely hated (by social media at least), that their opinions don't matter, and they have to earn their worth. My boyfriend struggles with all of this, and it's been an absolute battle to get him to be open and vulnerable, but he's done it and I can't be more proud of him. These men are feeling the effects that social media is having on our society. We are in the middle of a stupid gender war, which is very very loud on Internet spaces. People are wanting "live as the main character" and never settle for less, so they think they're always going to be better, always going to deserve better. And they are misguided by the perfect lens that social media has caused. People think we need to be picture perfect in reality, but that's not how the world works. We're moving too far online and it's only going to make this loneliness more evident.
A lot of men are like the line from Shaft, nobody understands him but his woman. My wife is from another culture and Christian, and highly intelligent. I found her online. She sees the insanity of women's expectations and constant disappointment. Calls them snakes. She did not blame me for any shyness, weirdness, or lack of relationship experience. That should be a plus. If more women were like her they would make themselves a lot happier. Be like Dr. Zhivago and Just. Live. (but don't commit adultery).
Guys there are just as many channels and comments that talk badly about women! Why oh why are you guys letting what a tiny % of women online say affect your mindset?!? You are letting it warp your mind - try to get offline more and stop watching this sort of content. Many of you guys are probably terminally online
@@brianmeen2158My dude, I'm not chronically online, and I also don't think you read my original comment very clearly. I was addressing an issue that men are currently facing online, that many people don't want to talk about. No where in my original comment did I say I think the red pill community is right or that I agree with it. Allow me to rephrase: women experience horrible things online. Men experience horrible things online. The online world twists our vision of reality and gives us false versions of reality. People fall into the trap of being the main character, aka believing that they can manifest whatever world they want. The other side of the spectrum is falling into hustle culture, which tells you that you need to spend all your time working to gain money which will give you worth. In my original comment I called the gender war on social media stupid. Me addressing the fact that men are dealing with a mental health crisis right now is not negating the fact that women are facing their own or even similar issues.
My dude I don't think you read my original comment in full. I was addressing the fact that men are facing a mental health crisis right now, and it isn't being addressed but rather made fun of or put down. Me addressing this fact doesn't negate women facing their own or similar issues. I don't align with red pill thought, in fact I find it rather insulting that is even exists. The other part of my original comment was talking about the stupid gender war we see online. Social media itself has it's own negative effects as well, seeing as there's the hustle culture that tells you you have to earn your worth, either through money or productivity. The main character syndrome tells you you can manifest your own reality (which is not true at all and gives a warped sense of reality). Also, thanks for assuming I'm chronically online when I'm not. You don't know the first thing about me so let's not jump to conclusions.
Last girl I dated was I was 21 years old. Last girl I asked out was a few years after that at 25. I’m 33 now and each year gets harder and harder to even try to get back into dating in this society.
Similar for me. 30 now, been single since 27. Before that painful break up, i had been with over 2 dozen women in my adult life. Ever since that break up, its like my charm is all gone. The hostile feminist climate of today doesnt help though.
Power thru it, guys! Develop an I don't give a 💩 attitude on the inside, the women can't hurt you, no matter how 🔥 they are. Screw their rejection! It don't mean nuthin', not a thing! You got this! They're out there! Go make it happen. Be kind but not a sap or a jerk & it will pay off!
Man, im actually 25 now and im about to turn 26. And ive had a similar situation. I was 22 when i was with her. She fucked me up. Now i havent dated since i was talking to a couple of girls over those 5 years, but i never really connected with them. But yeah the more you look and expect the harder it gets. Im struggling hard in life, in between jobs, still living with the folks, and to be quite honest, i havent had a reason to give a fuck, at all.
Absolutely... stay off dating apps and social media. Young people's brains are rotting away on social media and cellphones. Bunch of bullshit man. You're right. Women are not very approachable at all these days.
36 is not past your prime, fam. There's just as many women looking for older guys as younger guys. As long as you know how to speak to another human person and engage in a conversation, which is what a lot of women have trouble with when it comes to younger guys they think are too immature, you're in the running. Just have to find the right type of girl and leave behind the red flags.
@@ConspireTheMuse yes it is if I live another 36 years I’d be lucky a lot of people I know have passed away a lot earlier hence I’m past my prime which is why being in your prime is probably your late twenties to early thirties I’m 36 I’m past the early thirties hence I’m past my prime
@@Fighting_irish493 Oh, you use "prime" as "halfway through life expectancy". That's not what prime means. You're only past your prime if you give up where you're at. Not to mention, dudes don't have to worry about girl things like menopause. I don't think men get out of their prime until they're running 40%+ on medical assistance. And even then, that's only physical prime. Nothing about mental prime until you've got dementia or something.
It's because women who are interested do the same stuff that women who are friendly do which results in a friend/brother zone and it happens repeatedly
sometimes it's just your environment move around, travel, not for the purpose of shopping for women but for making meaningful friendships, and maybe you'll find a romantic relationship too. It doesn't mean change continents or countries, even taking an adventure to a different city is good. You'll find your person as long as you're not bitter and blaming society for your dating problems
My problem was that I never made a move to get physical. I was naive and ignorant, and thought that girls didn’t want to get physical. Why? Because everywhere you turn you hear women talking about wanting to find someone who actually cares about them as a person and doesn’t just want sex. So even though I had been dating girls I was relatively old before one made it clear to me that she wanted to be kissed and I had my first kiss. She was very open with me about what she did and didn’t want. After that, all of my past failures suddenly made perfect sense. That’s what it took for me-a girl willing to make the first move. I don’t need it to happen again, but I did need it that once. Edit: btw, I hear this a lot from girls, “I made it obvious.” So you just straight out told him or acted on it? If not, then no you didn’t make it obvious. Not for a man, at least. Clues and hints suck for getting what you want.
@@kevinmorrissey9709 Sounds like we’re watching these videos for different reasons. One of wants to gain better understanding and self-improvement. The other one just wants everyone to know that they don’t know what he doesn’t want. Everyone’s different. I’ll hand that to you.
@@mrpsclas... Well said man. I had the same experience. My first gf wasn't til in was 30... That's how effed up my youth was. My patents are good people, but useless at training a young man to succeed. My second gf, barely, was the one that asked me if I wanted to kiss her... And that jump started my dating life. She didn't stay with me long, butnit helped me understand how to escalate.
Sounds so familiar! My dad made sure I never came close to getting a girl pregnant so I was afraid to try anything physical unless it was a single mom who knew what she wanted for a 1 nighter. I missed so many opportunities by thinking girls didn't want guys to try to get into their clothes. Change came when I learned the lesson in the video and started presenting the real me who I liked. Happily married for 30 years to a hot wife!
I haven't been in "the game" for a couple of decades; but I always figured it was just so fake - two people meeting up every now and then and being on their best behaviour, thus not seeing the real person on the other side of the restaurant table. I had better things to do with my time.
I somewhat agree. But I should mention with the way society is currently we men are always walking on glass. And confidence gets destroyed by over almost Everything...😢
I’m 25 and never been in a relationship yet. High school I was 300lbs and all the negative talk from ppl really weighed me down. College was all online due to COVID. Don’t party. Started talking to this really attractive girl (22yo) 4mo ago and things started extremely well. Third date she told me she wanted to marry her 31yr old ex. Add that with she made it clear she needed to take it slow and never wanted to commit. I knew it was a red flag but I liked her and needed the experience of dates and meeting friends etc. She ended it last month (prob for the best) cuz I thought I had to lie to keep her there (and those lies eventually came out). It does suck but I’m glad I got the experience. I learned from my mistakes and will try and move on
28 years old. Personal Trainer. Never been in a serious relationship. I feel like when I connect with someone, they usually start to distance them self from me leaving me confused. I usually mirror their emotions but damn it’s hard. This one I’ve liked since September 2023 recently broke up with her Boyfriend at the start of January and I’ve given her a ton of space and told her “go work on yourself” but man, I just want her to be mine 😔😢
She's not working on herself bro. The hot guy at the bar is. Make a move before the knot he's been working on releases or she's going to keep going back to him.
26 here, I made 60k last year welding, I hit the gym 3 times a week, I deadlift 400 and can do 22 pull ups and am great at playing guitar. I've never had a girlfriend because men have no bodily autonomy. Long story short, infant circumcision damaged my penis to the point it doesn't function as a sexual organ. What happened to me is actually not that uncommon, just most of us who it's happened to will never publicly admit it out of shame and denial. I've rejected some fairly attractive girls that actually approached me irl because I know I'm a cripple.
Don't say that. A girl might like you regardless of that. For some girls that won't be a major inconvenience, because they will love you for who you are. A relationship is more than just that, is about your connection, and you two can always figure out away. You need to gain confidence, and learn that not everyone person out there is mature enough to accept other people's differences. Some girls, and guys too, might make fun of you but, they are the problem not you.
@@moon66487 It's hard to have confidence when you know you're objectively damaged goods. I will try to have more self worth though, i think you could be right about them being the problem not me since I never chose to be like this. I don't think anyone mature would make fun of someone with a disability, though I have experienced some bad shit in that way.
Either defnitely, definitely, definitely want two children, or stay single forever. If you do not want children, do NOT enter into a "relationship" with a woman. They are nothing but trouble.
Exactly. These guys should consider being single in this generation a gift from Heaven. The “pain” of not having a girlfriend is sweet and light compared to the undying hell of getting divorced.
@@Dominic1962 I was served with an OP first to get me booted from the home. Two weeks later, in a dive hotel, I was served with divorce papers. I have wept every day for 500 days straight. I have two little children, too. I never cheated, abused, etc. All I did was block my mother in law's phone number because she called my house everyday for 20 years at random times instead of using a cell phone. My wife and I stopped having sex, so it created an atmosphere of resentment. Then, my wife's sister convinced her to divorce me to try to take everything. We were happy, too. Divorce is far worse than death. I do not want to be here. I am thinking of committing suicide.
@Richard-zz7gm ah well, good for those guys! And hopefully those women too, if the men are good and honest. As for the rest of your comment, it's a bit random. It almost reads like advice! Which would be a weird plot twist considering the previous comments lol
Self doubt will destroy a man’s confidence but if you go for it and even get rejected you’ll still have that satisfaction of coming out of you’re comfort zone
What about guys like me who are literally twice that age, (I'm 50), and have constantly been told by numerous women over the decades that I'm "ugly, creepy, scary, disgusting, hideous, pathetic, useless", etc., etc., even though I am always the nicest, friendliest, most positive energy, helpful, happy, and Loving Soul and Spirit that you'd ever even imagine IF you actually were to take the time to really get to know the real ME on the inside, but since I have an asymmetrical face, no teeth, and I'm balding, apparently I'm just not physically attractive enough to deserve Love from anyone else besides myself, so that is all I can do. And I would NEVER make a video of myself showing my face to the world, because I already know that the majority of the comments would just be people making fun of my looks... Either that or just feeling "sorry" for me in some insincere way... So I don't even bother with that, I just stay private and do my own thing, with many nerdy hobbies and such. That keeps my mind and Spirit occupied and content at least.
I think we hear this all the time but **beauty is subjective**.. we are all attracted to different looks and finding someone that appreciates what you may think to be flaws is the best you can do. I have no idea what you look like, but even if I did, my opinion doesn't matter as much, because it's an opinion and there's over 3.85 billion women on this planet, some would say you're steaming hot and others would say you're downright ugly and maybe you aren't very attractive in terms of society's beauty standards today. Be content with what you've been given, come to terms with what you have because it won't change unless you get surgical procedures. Own it, by own it I don't mean be delusional and say I'm the hottest man on earth but accept what's right in front of you and surround yourself with people that do the same. As a teenage girl, I'm trying to practice self love and acceptance and it's good you're practicing it yourself and if women don't like it boohoo.. I'm sure you'll find your person
@@k5ylaa Thanks for the kind words, and Yes; we should ALL have self Love at the very least, while also doing whatever we can to constantly improve ourselves in whatever ways we can, however... I don't think you understand just how many dozens, (probably more like hundreds), of times that I've heard women who are just being polite say those exact words to me, but meanwhile, NEVER being interested in me personally themselves enough to actually go out on a date with me, OR even give me their phone number, so I get it, it's fine, it is what it is, but after this many decades of absolutely ZERO ACTUAL, TRUE interest in me from ANY woman who's ever interacted with me in any way, I've just pretty much totally given up and went completely MGTOW now. I definitely don't miss the continual rejection, that's for sure, and I'm all but totally DONE with it ALL by now, with the VERY slight thought of a chance that MAYBE someday, somewhere, there MIGHT actually be a woman who can actually see past my "hideous" external flaws, and actually be able to notice AND appreciate my inner Spirit qualities MORE than she is turned off by my physical looks... I definitely don't hold my breath waiting around for or even looking for a woman like that, but I still try to keep an open mind and heart to the 1 in a billion or so chance that she might come my way AND we both take notice of each other in a good way... We'll see what the future brings, but in the meantime, I've come to the ability to be totally fine and happy completely single and alone.
@@JoeJ-8282 I think anyone that is jst trying to be nice would try to comfort you. What's portrayed in the media can create unrealistic standards of how someone should look. Because of that there are lovely souls who do more good than harm that are judged and stereotyped because of their appearance. So I see why you're kind of opting out so I wish you well, and if you do not find yourself person I still hope you have a blessed life. :)
@@k5ylaa You too, as you seem like you're trying your best to be better than the mass majority of modern women, so you must've been raised right, with good moral values and respect for others, which is truly good to see, especially from someone your age!... Whatever you do when you get past HS, please don't ever become just another 304, jumping from one random "Chad" to another while you're "young and free", and then decide later on in your mid 30's or whatever that you want to finally "settle down" and find a good guy for a LTR... Guys don't find that life behavior attractive at ALL in a woman, because then you've had so many failed "situationships" by the time you come to the realization that you want something more than just that, that at that point you're just considered "used goods", which is NOT wife material, so be very selective and consider a guy's ENTIRE character and Spirit too, not just his looks, and find a truly Good Spirited, High Quality, Loving, REAL Man early on in your life, to be your life partner, into the future, (before you've had too MANY partners, which reduces your ability to properly pair bond with any one of them!), and then once you've got that truly good guy, take the time and energy and effort to fully develop a TRUE connection and really deep level bond with him, AND stick with him through the inevitable tough times too and make it work together for the long term, and then if you guys decide to develop a family together later then you'll already know how to deal with life's ups and downs together as a truly Loving couple, which will in turn make for being better parents to your future kids if you do have any... Best of luck to you into your future life adventures!... :)
Let me speak from experience on thi. I'm 22 and have only ever had 1 close girlfriend. After things happened, I was going though the world seeing girls smear guys for asked for a date, for not asking for a date, for doing what their girlfriend wanted them to do, and for not doing what their girlfriend wanted them to do. Yes, it might be sad to see guys who are 25+, good looking, etc, but are single. But, it isn't though lack of trying. How many time could you hear no from people you find attractive and would like to get to know better? Because I can greentree that the majority of those guys were put down harshly too many times and have given up because they could never get a chance
Bold of you to assume that it’s a lack of confidence. Ever consider past trauma or abuse? Most men are hesitant because they don’t know how they’ll be treated. I can tell you right now that’s the exact case with me and that’s why I’m now 21 and have never even gotten into the talking phase when it comes to pursuing a relationship and building a connection.
23 years old and never had a girlfriend . The thing is, I’ve been trying my best to get girls but I always screw up by either doing or saying things that subconsciously turns them off . To be honest , the only way I’ve gotten rejected is ONLY by being told “ I have a boyfriend “ . It just doesn’t work on me no matter what I do. At this point I give up since it just won’t work for me and I’ll keep focusing on my self development.
Never show interest on a woman if you are not consistent. It's not your fault. This society is sick in irresponsibility. Real white men are not allowed to take political control.
"Just find yourself, bro. It's ez." Yes, and 'finding yourself' is achieved by doing what, exactly? Nobody will tell me. I haven't gotten a single answer on how to find myself. No emails, no postcards, not even a brick with a piece of paper tied to it flying through my windows. People always say that finding yourself is a subjective experience. So noone could tell me how to 'find myself' and 'find a way to be comfortable in my own skin'. How do you get comfortable in your own skin? If money, status, and having things to do isn't 'finding yourself' then what the hell does 'find yourself' even mean?! None of this makes sense, and everyone who tells me this over and over again can get fucked! Find myself?!?! FUCKING WHERE DUDE??!? HE'S RIGHT HERE! Sitting typing away, looking to youtube for answers because he can't stop fumbling! I can't even focus on a single thought at a time there's too much! It's too much! What does all this stuff even mean!?
Ask yourself these questions: why do you do what you do? Why are you interested in what you're interested in? Why do you have the friends you have? Why do you have the job you have? There are many more questions. And be brutally honest with yourself. And be prepared to not like some of your answers!
Money + Status + Looks is something gained in order to be honoured by other people.. "Finding yourself" is to honoured by yourself. The best way to find yourself is to observe and analyse To be comfortable with your own skin you have to first see and understand what your own skin looks like.. so take some time for a journey, as the previous question says, "ask yourself these questions".. this will help you gain an understanding of who you are as a person. Use past experiences to also help you come to a conclusion such as your childhood that can help reveal why you do what you do up to now. Try journaling and asking yourself a few questions in the morning to kick start your day, or maybe before you sleep.. be comfortable in your own skin by reflecting on past experiences and not letting them define you, and preforming self acceptance by practicing gratitude, being thankful for the littlest things, Once you've identified the the 5 W's, (why, what who, where, when), you can then use what you have to try out and experience new things that can help you find out what fulfills you. and if you find that your appearance may be a problem for you, you can work on your psychical attractivness by of course doing what everyone does. Exercising, eating healthy, prioritising your mental and psychical health by getting an adequate amount of sleep but finding yourself starts within, and only you can do it.. I'm still on that journey myself as a teenager, but I hope this helped a little bit
I'm 29 I'm virgin gonna be 30 still 😂😂😂 cause last girl I like I gave her note compliment and my number , she reply as harassment I had do deal with bunch of medieval people..
You can still be confident about yourself but also believe you have little or nothing to offer. For example, when I was at college, plenty of my classmates said I had a high level of confidence (I was older than most of them and knew where I wanted to go in life - that's why I was there), but I sure didn't feel I had anything that the girls wanted.
You can still be confident, while working at McDonald's. But it doesn't change the fact that you work at Mcdonalds. The key is to look like someone who's one day going to own a McDonald's. And That's only done through action.
Nothing is more damning to women than seeing good guys give up. I’ve given up pursuing as well. I have no idea what women are looking for but stability, sanity, safety, spirituality, financial freedom, intelligence, ambition, independence, leadership, thoughtfulness, humility and reflection, growth mindset, and an action packed lifestyle of travel and outdoor adventure aren’t apparently it.
@@jordanharrison8769 I don't think you need to be rich in order to be adventurous. I know some rich men who are not adventurous and boring in my opinion. It depends on the person
Guys who had sisters are used to speaking to girls, much more than only boys in a family. Also, nice guys don't act spontaneously with many girls, 'cause father frightened his sons not to bother or hurt girls, when they were very young.
I had four sisters and had a lot of female friends growing up and throughout my twenties. Any of these women that I was interested in always told me nope, we were just friends. I don't talk to any of them anymore. I'm 45 now, in great shape, and I'm still "only" 5'8" tall. If you don't check off multiple boxes for a modern woman, they are just not interested. The punch list is too long, and that's one big reason why so many single men are out there. If you're not top 20% in a woman's eyes, they won't even think about talking to you.
Plus you have a LOT of time. Especially in your twenties. I was pretty good at occupying myself, single and 25 and I had No doubt that it was just going to be the running theme for the rest of my life. But stuff happens, it turns out! There's a lot of time and 25 is not even close to old. Even if you feel that way now. And here's a thought! You can be in a relationship and still lonely and lacking connection and depth and self-worth.
"And lean all the way into it". That stuck with me. I no longer care anymore. Although I'm still single, I can tell the difference and also how happy I've been when I just don't care about a women's opinion anymore. I don't care what they think of me, and I don't care about them either. It truly allows me to just be myself without feeling like every moment around a women is a test. When I'm being myself. It seems like my energy just radiates and people love it.
The comments section is more helpful and empathic towards men. I like reading the support. We've always been told that we're not good enough. We've also been ignored and rejected a lot. It takes a toil.
I feel like many of them have probably seen the unrealistic expectations on the dating apps and got discouraged. Happily, I was able to find someone I was attracted to who didn't throw up all the red flags I wanted to avoid.😂
i like how your content is back to helpful and positive with actionable advice. You are right on here, but maybe missing that these guys probably have gotten rocked and never recovered. would love to see something about that tbh. keep it up
In my opinion, the dating game is so broken that you either get lucky or not. There is no proven method because what may have worked now may not work in the future. That’s a simple fact. I think both men and women need to really be honest with themselves and ask why they want a relationship to begin with. Is it sex? is it companionship? is it to get married and build a family? Are there other ways to achieve those? why do you want it to happen your way?
I’m a girl of 22 y.o., I’ve had two “boyfriends”, but this was in teenage years & lasted for 1-2 months each lol. In my “adult” years I’ve never had a relationship and I’ve been rejected even on going for coffee. That didn’t do anything to my self esteem tho, on the opposite, I feel how I grow from every experience and how I’m healing. I really don’t know what’s the matter with men fearing rejection. Like someone not liking you back doesn’t determine your self worth, at all. It just means they’re not into you for their complicated reasons. Maybe they are already having a deeper connection with someone else, and you have no right to ruin it; maybe they were hurt enough by someone in the past. We never know a person’s heart. Also maybe it’s the best if you get rejected and don’t engage in toxic relationship. A lot of ppl had plenty of “relationship”, but those were all only hurtful and destructive. It’s easier to learn to love someone from the scratch, than to re-learn how to trust.
Honestly, im secure in who i am, my issue is the plethora of stories that exist of men approaching women and getting called creeps. I dont have people at work, when im in my hobby places the women are either, nonexistent, with a dude, or "shields up" like both headphones in and obviously focused on the task and online dating is just a cesspool. I was finally gonna have a decent opportunity on valentines cause i got tickets to a mixer at a place i enjoy and of course for the first time in 3 years im deathly sick this week. Im 25 and i had 1 long term relationship that started in college and now meeting someone feels like an impossible task.
I love that you are in my algorithm. All of your content is soo accurate. You are very in tune with what you say. Keep up the great work :) As for the men who see this.. don't stop building your self up and being the man who you want to be. Be unapologetically genuine, resilient, and awesome! 😎
Thank you for not blaming women for their nonexistent confidence. I 100% believe that if you're a good, fun person, you will find another good, fun person to love. Imagine blaming men in general for some girls being self conscious and insecure.
As a guy who was completely rocked by his last relationship I get this. There are a lot of cliches statements that one can make about snapping out of depression/rejection/heart break but at the end of the day most of it comes down to time. Just focus on yourself and your hobbies for a bit and don’t worry about anything else. 25 is really young, you got plenty of time to figure it out and find someone. Also, someone always has it worse than you so appreciate what you have and gamble with the cards that were dealt.
I am a girl and I feel this way it’s all self-concept. You need to look into like manifestation self-concept all of that. I’m literally 35 and I’ve only ever kissed man when I was drunk I guess I was out on a date in the Bahamas but that’s the only date I guess a date when I was 21, but I felt that I was too ugly. Who is embarrassing
It's not lack of confidence. It's the high probability of a false accusation that would undoubtedly have legal consequences. Passport Bros to the Airport ✈
the unrealistic expectations western men have for non-western women is quite different to reality. Youll mature when you realise even continents like Asia have women that are just like the western women you're trying to escape from, they just speak a different language, different upbringings and culture. You're still going to be seeing materialistic women, toxic women and all sorts.. especially if you obviously look foreign you can be either a green card, a one way ticket to financial stability and opportunities or love. You can find love anywhere even from the country you're in, so instead of generalizing all western women and deluding yourself into thinking they're all bad, and that non-western women are lovely darlings that only want you for love do understand, with the invention of social media, and influence it had on people out of western countries, don't expect a huge difference all I can say is if you want a women from Asia or something, treat her well, and understand your poor is her rich, with that don't manipulate or exploit her because you have the upper hand
I learned this the other day. If you hate yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself. You’ll project those feelings onto others. You’ll treat them like they hate you until they eventually do. You need to learn to accept and love yourself. Believe in your own capabilities. Even if it takes what you believe to be lying to yourself. If you tell yourself you’re bad with women you’ll be bad with women. Literally just start telling yourself that you’re good with women. It won’t be everything you need but it’s a great start.
I promise you its not only them not being confident, its also not wanting to be perceived as a creep if they thought something was a hint and it wasn't.
I'm going to paraphrase from Chris Williamson's interview with Robert Glover - "One of the most attractive things is a man who is comfortable in his own skin, knows where he's going and looks like he's having fun going there." Another interview Chris did, with a man whose name escapes me at the moment, added that if you only have one of those things - Comfortable in your own skin, know where you're going and/or have fun - you're going to attract some people. Also, speaking from experience, your mind can and will screw you over unless you do some soul searching. You can be the cringiest mf out there and not even be aware of it, because your mind tells you you're not doing anything wrong and it's the world that's at fault when things go sideways. And I wholeheartedly agree that finding your true self and leaning into it is the way to go.
Last time I've liked a girl and told her that I like her and I wanted to be in a relationship with her, she took that topic to public, started mocking me like: "look at this looser, he has feelings for me", and later called me disgusting. And by public I don't mean social media, it was all the people that were around there. After that there is no confidence left to like a girl anymore or even try, cause it's just pain for nothing. Also another one was using my feelings to get what she needs at the moment, if she didn't need anything, then I just was nothing to her.
I think women don't understand they aren't being blunt like men are. I was told a few years ago that I girl I used to like actually liked me back but didn't make her feelings known. Like damn I cant read minds.
Funny, my brothers once jokingly said that I'm the ugliest (of 4), but would get the prettiest girlfriends, due to my personality & character traits. Although it didn't feel like a compliment, they were right after all. 🤓
It's true though my biggest issue that I crush hard, I wish I wasn't like this but it's how I'm wired, I've gone too many times to women that I was crushing on to be told that I wasn't enough, I have been working on myself though, but it doesn't make my confidence any higher it's hard, but unfortunately I know that I need to get over it and keep trying
I spent my entire high school life being called fat and ugly by guys and girls. Now 3 years later ive lost over 100 lbs and look better. The problem is i cant talk to women, im terrified to approach because i dont want what little confidence ive built up to get demolished by some random woman
You still have time. 😭 but understand self improvement doesn't jst mean go to the gym, earn six figures, be confident. It also means developing and maturing mentally by getting out of the victim mentality and realising that society isn't the main cause for your problems. By this I mean, as you grow, rejection will hurt like a bitch, failed relationships will feel like the world is ending. but don't allow that to make you bitter and hold hate deep inside. Trial and error is amazing, and some things just aren't meant to be. As a 16 year old I see a lot of older men hold hate for women, they end up bitter despising women and giving up on dating. I just hope that this new generation of men can be kind hearted
Yeah social skills is an issue but at the same time being socially inept is usually due to a lack of social opportunities directly out of highschool if you don’t go the college route which a lot of people don’t
Im 26 and single, i fully understand where these guys are coming from. I noticed a big changed when i stopped giving a shit, but not in a sort of "im never talking or looking at a girl ever again" mode but more "itll happen when it happens. I put every attractive girl on a pedistal all my life, now i just go with the flow and see what happens. Im not looking for a one night stand. Im looking for a life partner. Im the picky one. She isnt better than me. Ever since i molded this approach to life ive noticed a lot more girls giving me attention in more obvious ways. I managed to find one that is gorgeous and doesnt do things like one word me in order to get me to kiss her fucken feet and do what she wants. And if it doesnt work out ill carry on but retain my dignity because ill never fall pver backwards for a girl again unless she ends up being the mother pf my children and the heart of my home. This wont help many of you, but it might some. I hope you keep your chin high, your mputh shut and your heart warm. Never stop. You've got this brother 💪
One thing I trully hate about being a Single guy in his 20s is the fact that all my female family members and Aquitances think that its so easy to find a girl These days . Or even worse that its easy to cope ("Just spend time whith family and get over your loneliness ") this makes me feel sick . In the same time they accusing me of being picky but have a list of requariments that my future girlfriend shoud have !
This is a big, complex issue. And, unfortunately, the only strat that will work here is blunt, simple, and miserably difficult. The problem is confidence. Since their school days, men have been tanking hit after hit, being denigrated for their natural inclinations, being male in general, and by endless comparisons to their female counterparts. The sheer volume of single-mother homes not teaching men to have self respect while teaching them that all they have to do to be nice is astounding, and the same homes telling daughters to never settle for less than perfect and telling the girls never to trust men isn't helping. MeToo is terrifying. Being silenced by women on so many topics is scary. I get it and I agree. But Billie is right that figuring out who you are and unapologetically being that person is the only strat that will work. Don't ever, *EVER* become the person she wants you to be. She doesn't know who she wants you to be, only that she wants things to conform to what she feels. The world is forever and a day catering to her, and she expects you to do so, too. Don't. Be you. Be skilled, capable, and happy in your own right. Decide for yourself what you will and what you won't tolerate, and hold yourself and all people in your life to those standards. I like to ask the following questions of a guy that is asking what these guys are: Can you sew a button back on a shirt and iron it? can you demonstrate two ways to tie a tie? Can you make some basic dishes and one or two that wow people? Do you have two or more skills typically associated with men (automotive, carpentry, woodworking, metalworking, appliance repair, HVAC, etc.) Do you know how to keep your house clean and do it? Why would I ask this? Because if you don't *need* someone to do all of these things, you are self-sufficient. You don't have to rely on anyone else. When you don't need a person, but want them in your life, you can look at them more objectively, and see the red flags you tend to ignore if you are afraid of her getting away. You also bring some things to the table when you do meet a good woman. Having things to put on the table means that you can reasonably expect the same from her, and this will help you identify the women who just intend to take. Is this going to be fun? No. It's going to be a good bit of work on your part, and you'll be doing it alone. Does this feel like the girls you meet are waiting at the finish line to pick the winners? Sure. But if we are being fair with ourselves, asking a woman to like us for who we are means having something to "who we are" that is enticing. I am able to do a lot of simple repairs on appliances, furniture, vehicles, and computers. I can make a few basic dishes like grilled cheese with tomato soup and quesadillas, and I can make so many varieties of sushi that it will make your head spin (and learned how to pronounce them in Japanese so I have a topic of discussion!) I can sew buttons back on and make some seams that separate serviceable. I can tie a tie five different ways (including making one serve as bow tie!), polish shoes, make costumes, build models, design and construct furniture with special features (seriously, my gaming table is pretty cool), and 3D print. EVERY last thing I can do was a combination of CZcams learning and the temerity to try. Literally figure out what you like. Dive headfirst into that. Live your life worrying about being authentically yourself. Leave the passenger seat open for the girl that sees you and wants to share that trip with you, and politely ask anyone who wants to mess with the GPS and/or the radio to exit the vehicle.
OK I’m going to do exactly as you say. I’ll walk up to any woman and say whatever I feel like no matter how forward, suggestive, shocking, or honest. Ooh they really hate honesty! Perhaps they need to be taught a lesson in respect or accountability. That ought to be fun!
This may sound weird - But for me who's super fit (and am always told I'm handsome) I don't know where the opportunities are and I feel like everywhere I go where there are women - they are afraid of me. Every casual attempt I make seems to backfire. I'm 28 always been single.
No, the truth is women will one of two things make you feel comfortable make you feel secure in the minute you start explaining how you feel emotionally. You’re a Simp or your weak number two play too many games today they like you tomorrow they don’t today they want you tomorrow you’re just a friend, that’s why all these guys are single because they’re tired of the jokes and the gameplay
I’ve only been on maybe four or five dates in my life and I’m pushing 40 and I’m still single never had a relationship and yeah I’ve been hurt multiple times trying to get online with stuff and it never panned out. I’m just tired of it.
The key to being an interesting person is to do interesting things. You don’t have to extreme stuff like sky diving Baby steps Take a cooking class Art class Martial arts Wood working Don’t do these things for girls but for yourself. You’ll eventually realize all this cool stuff you know how to do and you can’t help but start feeling good about yourself. And then, people around you will pick up on that positive aura around you, including girls. Your confidence will come naturally! 😊😊❤❤❤ Be strong, be brave and be persistent fellas!
As a young man I found that the interesting things I did were - of course - very interesting to me, but not to the girls. Maybe I was doing the "wrong" interesting things, LoL?
Yeah I have to add some input here. Today's modern woman don't acknowledge men. I'm almost in my mid 30s and the mother of my child still won't give me the time of day. So it really is this whole "independent" mindset some woman have that has ruined society. Honestly the whole structure of finding Love has fallen apart in today's modern world.
It's because men can't read women's subtle signs that they like them. Mostly the men are unaware that the women are hitting them up. We don't do subtle signs/hints. Tell us you like us or we'll be like: "Did she flirt with me? Naaaah, she's just being nice." And if we read your signs wrong and we take a chance we will be called toxic, creeps, and have a harassment case filed against us that ruin our career and friendships. Be more direct, ladies.
9 /10 times these same men were treated like sh* t by a past gf and now they’re self esteem has been rocked.
FACTS BROTHER 🔥
The titles literally said never had a gf. Did you even pay attention
STOP BLAMING WOMEN FOR YOUR LACK OF INITIATIVE. Its for sure lack of self esteem after a bad breakup. I speak from experience. I was very confident from 18-20. After my breakup I started spiraling downward and I would just game at home. I would go out but I wouldn't speak too much. Im 30 now and I'm back out there. There will always be shitty people. Women and Men. You blaming women and not taking initiative to get out of that mindset is whats holding you back. Get out there, up your communication skills, be yourself but improve yourself and watch it just happen naturally.
That's me 100% rn
@@zumasa9991 lack of initiative has nothing to do with what he just said 😂
It’s simple really. Go 20+ years of being told no by literally any female you end up liking and see how you feel after all those years lol
Feeling like that currently bro, like someone from work ended in the friendzone
@Richard-zz7gmno woman is higher value than you. This out of my league BS is crippling. I've had plenty of girls who.we're "out of my league."
You had 20 years to improve after each attempt yet you’re still getting rejected and not have a girl? That’s the main problem
Exactly, we’ve learned the pattern and the 💩gets old🥳
Be honest. How many women have you actually approached in 20+ years? My guess would be maybe two.
That take is actually a little shallow. When women are not comfortable in their skin, everybody sympathizes with them. If a man is not comfortable in his skin, it's his problem... Why is that exactly? The answer: because women don't think it's attractive... Women need to change their standards. Men are expected to change their standards for women, but not women for men... That is the whole problem in the first.
Why do you, as a man, want to be treated like a woman?
@@abelmendez8075 Lmao ok tough keyboard warrior.
Yes exactly, it is a double standard
Saying it's women's fault won't do you any good and is also not remotely true. Who told you that women don't want a man who knows where he is at and is comfortable with their strengths and weaknesses? Plus, saying they should lower their standards is just sad because what are you even referring to? You see men who aren't the best looking or rich being in relationships because they are true to themselves
@@abelmendez8075Because women get treated better than men, women are loved unconditionally unlike men.
'Just be yourself'💀truly profound
Women never say what they mean, and they never mean what they say. And they never will.
I'll translate that for the next guy who reads this; "Don't try to be something you're not." And once you really start digging deep into that you realize that you do a whole lot of things based on fear, shame and/or assumptions, which ultimately means you're not being yourself.
I also believe the woman in the video said "find your true self," not "be yourself." There's a difference there, as a lot of people will swear up and down that they're "being themselves," despite constantly letting fear, shame and assumptions they pulled out of their behinds control them.
Take it from someone who went through all that crap - your mind can and will bend your perception of reality to fit your current beliefs. It will also blatantly lie to you to maintain status quo, telling you you're doing nothing wrong and that it's the world's fault things don't turn out the way you want.
@@Gnomleifthe last paragraph was very annoying to read because it's so true 😂😂
Just sitting there and being yourself getts you nowhere in Life. At least if you're a man. Men have to become someone that provides value. Women are just born with their value. Women can afford to just be their "Boring Selves." Women can afford to not live in REALITY. Women can afford to just show up to a date, not pay for her food, even though she makes 6 figures, and still bring NOTHING to the table in a relationship. Do you know why, becuz women don't offer any utility outside of sex.... And yett we still end up loving them and providing for them. But a woman will only love a man, under the condition that he PROVIDES VALUE. And women can still DIVORCE a man even who he had provided all of said Value. Becuz society has convinced men to lett them. Life is not about being yourself, it's about being the best. "It's survival of the fittest." Not survival of the selves. @@Gnomleif
@@Gnomleifmodern women are ruined by the smartphone. We’re doomed.
Some of us really have nothing to offer ,I'm working to stay afloat, I have to live with my parents because they're old and I'm there only son ,can't afford to hire someone to take care of them ,it isn't financially feasible. Living with your parents is a major turn off for almost all girls ,none would even listen as to why I live with them ,it isn't worth trying anymore because the moment she finds out I live with my parents I'm ghosted asap . also I'm not rich ,I'm bearly affording to eat . I'll just live with my parents cause they're the only family I have .
And here I am openly bragging to my students that I live with my parents as a way to show I have no expenses and thus more money.
I also care for my parents and have rid ourselves of rent payments due to investing.
By the way most under 30s lives with their parents.
@@FreeloadingBird2584 girl will walk out on you ,the first time they hear you live with your parents, it crazy ,they expect a person in there 20s to have a mansion and own a few cars ,lol.
What? You need to get outside your tiny little circle. I was with my boyfriend for 7 years before we moved in together, we both lived with our parents in our 20s. I know countless other couples that have done the same. Just because you’ve had a few experiences of women not liking you living with your parents, it doesn’t mean “almost all girls” don’t like it, not even remotely. You’re stuck in your own self made bubble.
@Richard-zz7gm You’re 100% correct. Then because they’ve watched those videos, more similar ones will be suggested which then warps their view that their experience and beliefs are more common than they actually are in real life. But it’s comfortable to them to stay in their bubble, ignorance is bliss I guess?
@@katr_i_na I stand corrected. Maybe I need to get out more ,God bless you and your bf .
That's a great saying "be yourself" yet the second you get with a girl all they do is try and change you. That's what the problem is. If men try to change a girl he's controlling, yet when it's reversed and it's a woman changing the man it's love and empowering.
Set clear boundaries and no woman wants do change you again
That's a nuanced subject. If a woman is trying to form you into some pissant who she can control for her own benefit, that's toxic. However, men need women who will help them become better through love, and that's what a healthy relationship is based on. Men can do the same for their wives, but generally a wife does that the best.
To all the invisible homies! I'm with ya'll, I've missed many chances because I always deemed myself not good enough and that there's always someone better out there for the. You need to realise that you gotta love yourself truely and honestly first before you can have someone else love you.
Having a single mother that put most of her needs first I definitely have problems with putting my needs first so this is why I'm single and avoiding women.
Best of luck to homies!
I thought I was the only one thinking there’s always someone better for her. This mentality needs to be changed.
@@mustsee715 I constantly think that
I just dont like lazy women. If a woman is interested in me and says nothing, thats a her problem. We start to not worry if we're good enough for women by refusing to play women's games
I never missed anything, all girls I liked either were already taken or didn't like me back when I asked. I'm just a friend for all of them
It's the threat of not only.being rejected but also accused of sexual harassment.
Men do sexualy abuse women though. Men need to start getting really angry about the losers who do these things because it's ruining it for everyone else.
Never had that problem haha losers
Then they complain why less men approach them, while they have the power to call sexual harrasment on you approaching her respectfully asking her out and all the simps belive it then.
They will.just reject you
@@Deathnote-OwnerAre you talking about the sexual harassment claims or rejection as well?
This is just another "just be yourself" - bs-"advice".
Doesnt help if women /w ridiculous standards treat you like crap when turning you down.
Stop blaming other people for your problems and take actions. If those don’t want you, keep up with your life.
Um self pity and blame game by guys is about as attractive as a girl with crooked teeth and bas breath
@@Que_te_mporta1 You obviously didnt get my comment.
Other ppl being rude for no reason is to blame on them and not on me. "be yourself" is still bs-advice.
I did take action, i stopped dating and i stopped asking women out, so keep your advices to yourself, nobody asked for it.
@@Austria002and that surely made you more unhappy. You talk about been rude but here you are been rude. I don't know who hurt you, but is clear you need to work on yourself. Making up excuses and ignoring the problem won't help you at all. Is clear you have self-esteem issues. You can't control what other people do or say, but you can decide how to react.
moon66487 Have you seen the vane narcissism of bcths lately? My wife does. It's hard out there for normal dudes.
The problem isn't that men aren't taking the right approach, the problem is that a man could literally do everything right and still fail simply because the woman was in a bad mood or was busy or just wasn't feeling it or just plain wasn't attracted or a million other things. You keep saying how men need to do things differently but women are making it abundantly clear that whatever the man does is completely irrelevant.
This society places way too much accountability and responsibility on men when it is clear that men don't really have the power in the dating world.
It’s so damned true!!!
@@WillieFungo it’s more nuanced than that. High value men have a lot of power in the dating world! Even
Mid tier guys can have quite a bit of power if they know how to play the game. The guys in the bottom 30 or so percent have no power though I agree.
@@brianmeen2158 But everyone already knows this. Chad doesn't need to watch her channel for advice. By default, this message is going out to the guys without as much power.
Its not about lack of confidence, the problem is women want perfection when it comes to a relationship, we really try to do our best but the minute we make a mistake, they leave because its so easy for a woman to run and find someone "better". Thats why so many of us are single. Becuase we are exhausted of trying to make ends meet.
Yup they expect us to have the four 6s of perfection and have the perfect flirting skills, social skills and charisma. Yet the moment they see a flaw in any of those, or think we're too "needy", they get the "ick".
@@aw-2130 exactly what happened to me. My ex told me she got the "ick" cuz apparently making an average income + giving English classes on the side isn't stable or good enough. It's been 2 months and i still can't help but feel devastated from her disrespecting me.
@@josephiglesias2986what happened to you can be a blessing, and it simply means that she's not the one for you, and vice-versa. I have 2 financially successful friends who admit that their spouse would not have given them the time of day in college nor at the beginning of their careers. It's not necessarily bad, but would u rather a person who would sees and sticks with you as you better yourself, or someone who only notices you at the finish line of your cadence -- like my aforementioned buddies?
Keep in mind that there is no right or wrong answer here as it depends on the individuals in question, and the hands dealt with in life. My buddies would rather their statement not be true, but alas. However, they do have other things that they admire in their spouse that are important to them, so it balances this out for them.
Is it possible to find one that isn't looking for perfection? It could be that we're choosing the wrong women too 🤷🏽♂️
@@909real5 of course its possible
Women are gifted with what men desire in early adulthood & mature accordingly. Men must earn attraction. Do you want fake confidence & arrogance or someone genuine?
Most men won't obtain confidence until their late 20s or early 30s after obtaining some accomplishments. They've earned & deserve their pride. Then suddenly all the women start noticing the young developed man vs the boy of his teens & 20s. This is bc you women all determine who is worthy to even speak to you. We hear a lot about how hard school is for women socially but seldom a thought for our young boys struggles. Why would the ignored & neglected have confidence?
Women saying this stuff to men is the peak silopsism. You aren't experiencing the world as a man. Men must earn their value so stop pretending it's easy for them to just assume it. For men confidence comes from accomplishment not simply existing.
So in essence you're telling men to act as women. I'm 43 & until very recently that has been the answer given to men... Act like women isn't an answer men need. They instead need to act as men.
Nah man, confidence is about just being confident in yourself, the most confident guys I know have neither ”earned it” or is over 20
That's just it. Why and how is it that guys who have little to offer have so much confidence? Are they just delusional? And women would rather experience delusional confidence than...anything else?
@@garrettduffy515Those young men (who btw are delusional and of course they are the minority of the elite 5%) are attractive only to young and inexperienced (usually bellow 22 years old) women.
After that age the game changes a lot.
Women start to find a real man...
i think i understand what you're saying, but I think true confidence comes from being okay with yourself even without having accomplished anything great.
having a good healthy relationship with yourself lets you be confident at any age. a good example of this is kids. Some kids are the most confident human beings you'll meet and it's not because it's fake or they are just dumb, but they are just happy being themselves and dont compare with what they "could be".
with this confidence and seeing women as other individuals, people can be attractive. it is hard to do this of course if you feel you dont have anything about yourself besides accomplishments. wish you all the best!
@@gunkman_man maybe because they raised in a healthy environment and they have genetically strong characters...
I was one of those 25 and single men although I did get a gf around that time. The issue is there is this cycle of insecurity that happens with us men. We will experience rejection which hurts our self esteem, and that makes future rejections more likely.
The only way of breaking this is to somehow ignore your past trauma and convince yourself that you are a worthwhile man. But it is very difficult to do that. And it is even harder when you see men around you also getting rejection.
Like consider, for a second, that you said all of these men were attractive. But imagine if they all knew each other. Well is it possible to imagine them sharing their experiences, and then collectively coming to the conclusion that they are all in fact unnattractive? You see them from your world, but we see ourselves in our world. And our world has different rules.
I’m like that too and I’m a girl I’m doing revisions by Neville Goddard I’m really bad with rejection. I am personally saving up for plastic surgery so that I can feel a lot more confident get my hair dyed blonde and work out every day for two hours.
@@Alicia-vq8jg wait are you a cis girl trying to date men? If so I highly doubt you need plastic surgery
Its very hard to break out of it when the full force of the state had been used against you falsey because some bitch was vindictive.
My recommendation is to pick activities with potential of meeting people, but will also build you as a person whether you meet someone or not. Let's take gym, cooking lessons, dancing lessons, and joining a local entrepreneur group for example.
Gym: potential of meeting people is low, but we can't deny the + of building your body and being healthy.
Cooking lessons: possibility of meeting a person varies, but have u ever met a woman who didn't like a guy who can cook? Plus, this can save you serious money from eating out. It will also help u stay true to your diet for that hard work you're putting at the gym
Dancing lessons: potential to meet people is quite high. This will also help build confidence with women as you are meeting then in an intimate yet not necessarily romantic setting. This is will also help with people to people interaction -- outside of a screen. Also, women in ballroom dancing clubs (salsa, chacha, etc...) are a lot more chillax than the ones in pop clubs. No pickup lines or Rico suave necessary to break the ice. Just ask for a dance, and let the dance be your Ice breaker.
Entrepreneur group: probability of meeting people (for romantic) purposes: low. However, you will see the world in a different light, and may end up improving your earning potential.
Now, do you see how each one of these activities still end up being a win even if no romantic partners come out of them? I mean do u know a lot girls who wouldn't at least be curious about a guy who can cook, dance, stays healthy, while trying to maximize his earning?
Keep in mind that those are just a few examples. I recommend u pick something that you're genuinely interested in, so that you can suck with it, and be truthful about its potential. For instance, videogames are a whole lot of fun, but how does it compare to the aforementioned activities in terms of growth and usefulness?
Last but not least, try to stick with the activity, which you will anyway if you genuinely enjoy it, even if you find someone. This will help balance you as a person, and not have the relationship be your life. I also heard women like a guy with passions other than her 😆
@@Alicia-vq8jg Do not change a damn thing about yourself!!!!! going to the gym is cool because you don't want to be an old person in the future who can barely move, but trust me when I tell you, you are perfect just the way you are
What is the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result.
What is the definition of Madness? Changing _Everything,_ and STILL getting the exact same result.
😂😂😂 i like
We've been rejected so many times its best to just have a good time
It's lack of confidence for them. Men are being told they're not enough, that they're widely hated (by social media at least), that their opinions don't matter, and they have to earn their worth. My boyfriend struggles with all of this, and it's been an absolute battle to get him to be open and vulnerable, but he's done it and I can't be more proud of him.
These men are feeling the effects that social media is having on our society. We are in the middle of a stupid gender war, which is very very loud on Internet spaces. People are wanting "live as the main character" and never settle for less, so they think they're always going to be better, always going to deserve better. And they are misguided by the perfect lens that social media has caused. People think we need to be picture perfect in reality, but that's not how the world works. We're moving too far online and it's only going to make this loneliness more evident.
A lot of men are like the line from Shaft, nobody understands him but his woman.
My wife is from another culture and Christian, and highly intelligent. I found her online. She sees the insanity of women's expectations and constant disappointment. Calls them snakes. She did not blame me for any shyness, weirdness, or lack of relationship experience. That should be a plus. If more women were like her they would make themselves a lot happier.
Be like Dr. Zhivago and Just. Live. (but don't commit adultery).
Guys there are just as many channels and comments that talk badly about women! Why oh why are you guys letting what a tiny % of women online say affect your mindset?!? You are letting it warp your mind - try to get offline more and stop watching this sort of content. Many of you guys are probably terminally online
@@brianmeen2158My dude, I'm not chronically online, and I also don't think you read my original comment very clearly. I was addressing an issue that men are currently facing online, that many people don't want to talk about. No where in my original comment did I say I think the red pill community is right or that I agree with it.
Allow me to rephrase: women experience horrible things online. Men experience horrible things online. The online world twists our vision of reality and gives us false versions of reality. People fall into the trap of being the main character, aka believing that they can manifest whatever world they want. The other side of the spectrum is falling into hustle culture, which tells you that you need to spend all your time working to gain money which will give you worth. In my original comment I called the gender war on social media stupid. Me addressing the fact that men are dealing with a mental health crisis right now is not negating the fact that women are facing their own or even similar issues.
My dude I don't think you read my original comment in full. I was addressing the fact that men are facing a mental health crisis right now, and it isn't being addressed but rather made fun of or put down. Me addressing this fact doesn't negate women facing their own or similar issues. I don't align with red pill thought, in fact I find it rather insulting that is even exists. The other part of my original comment was talking about the stupid gender war we see online. Social media itself has it's own negative effects as well, seeing as there's the hustle culture that tells you you have to earn your worth, either through money or productivity. The main character syndrome tells you you can manifest your own reality (which is not true at all and gives a warped sense of reality).
Also, thanks for assuming I'm chronically online when I'm not. You don't know the first thing about me so let's not jump to conclusions.
Last girl I dated was I was 21 years old. Last girl I asked out was a few years after that at 25. I’m 33 now and each year gets harder and harder to even try to get back into dating in this society.
Similar for me. 30 now, been single since 27.
Before that painful break up, i had been with over 2 dozen women in my adult life.
Ever since that break up, its like my charm is all gone. The hostile feminist climate of today doesnt help though.
Power thru it, guys! Develop an I don't give a 💩 attitude on the inside, the women can't hurt you, no matter how 🔥 they are. Screw their rejection! It don't mean nuthin', not a thing! You got this! They're out there! Go make it happen. Be kind but not a sap or a jerk & it will pay off!
Man, im actually 25 now and im about to turn 26. And ive had a similar situation. I was 22 when i was with her. She fucked me up. Now i havent dated since i was talking to a couple of girls over those 5 years, but i never really connected with them. But yeah the more you look and expect the harder it gets. Im struggling hard in life, in between jobs, still living with the folks, and to be quite honest, i havent had a reason to give a fuck, at all.
Alright bros get some passports and get online. You might have to eat guinea pigs but it's fine. I've eaten four.
I Love being single!!
The best way to stay happy single is to avoid dating apps. Women know how to make men feel like shit 😆
And they like doing it because they are evil by nature
Exactly
Absolutely... stay off dating apps and social media. Young people's brains are rotting away on social media and cellphones. Bunch of bullshit man. You're right. Women are not very approachable at all these days.
Dating apps won't make you less single, you will just go from happy single to unhappy single if you get on dating apps
jagosevatarion8822 That is true, I got such a fckn headache using them. Men should go off that sht and force bcths to go out in the real world.
Well said, thats why i don’t care as much anymore and try to do me best, and then when it happens it happens. Love is not forced it is found.
I’m 36 and I’ve given up on dating I’m past my prime and these woman aren’t worth it anymore
36 is not past your prime, fam. There's just as many women looking for older guys as younger guys. As long as you know how to speak to another human person and engage in a conversation, which is what a lot of women have trouble with when it comes to younger guys they think are too immature, you're in the running. Just have to find the right type of girl and leave behind the red flags.
@@ConspireTheMuse yes it is if I live another 36 years I’d be lucky a lot of people I know have passed away a lot earlier hence I’m past my prime which is why being in your prime is probably your late twenties to early thirties I’m 36 I’m past the early thirties hence I’m past my prime
@@Fighting_irish493 Oh, you use "prime" as "halfway through life expectancy". That's not what prime means. You're only past your prime if you give up where you're at. Not to mention, dudes don't have to worry about girl things like menopause. I don't think men get out of their prime until they're running 40%+ on medical assistance. And even then, that's only physical prime. Nothing about mental prime until you've got dementia or something.
I know 40+ year Olds in relationships with late 20 to early 30s girls. Sounds like you have a skill issue homie
It's because women who are interested do the same stuff that women who are friendly do which results in a friend/brother zone
and it happens repeatedly
Me 26yr virgin man, if these guys can’t pull a woman. My chances are about as good as a beach house surviving a tsunami.
sometimes it's just your environment
move around, travel, not for the purpose of shopping for women but for making meaningful friendships, and maybe you'll find a romantic relationship too. It doesn't mean change continents or countries, even taking an adventure to a different city is good. You'll find your person as long as you're not bitter and blaming society for your dating problems
My problem was that I never made a move to get physical. I was naive and ignorant, and thought that girls didn’t want to get physical.
Why? Because everywhere you turn you hear women talking about wanting to find someone who actually cares about them as a person and doesn’t just want sex. So even though I had been dating girls I was relatively old before one made it clear to me that she wanted to be kissed and I had my first kiss. She was very open with me about what she did and didn’t want. After that, all of my past failures suddenly made perfect sense.
That’s what it took for me-a girl willing to make the first move. I don’t need it to happen again, but I did need it that once.
Edit: btw, I hear this a lot from girls, “I made it obvious.” So you just straight out told him or acted on it? If not, then no you didn’t make it obvious. Not for a man, at least. Clues and hints suck for getting what you want.
This is cap. We see them smiling at us and looking, most guys are doing their own thing and don't need the headache a lot of women can bring
@@kevinmorrissey9709 Sounds like we’re watching these videos for different reasons. One of wants to gain better understanding and self-improvement. The other one just wants everyone to know that they don’t know what he doesn’t want. Everyone’s different. I’ll hand that to you.
@@mrpsclas... Well said man. I had the same experience.
My first gf wasn't til in was 30... That's how effed up my youth was. My patents are good people, but useless at training a young man to succeed.
My second gf, barely, was the one that asked me if I wanted to kiss her... And that jump started my dating life. She didn't stay with me long, butnit helped me understand how to escalate.
@@breakingthemasks bro, I know exactly what you mean 👍
Sounds so familiar! My dad made sure I never came close to getting a girl pregnant so I was afraid to try anything physical unless it was a single mom who knew what she wanted for a 1 nighter. I missed so many opportunities by thinking girls didn't want guys to try to get into their clothes. Change came when I learned the lesson in the video and started presenting the real me who I liked. Happily married for 30 years to a hot wife!
I do love the person who will never know how any of this feels talking about how to solve our problems.
FR
It's quite insulting. Women need to stop hyper fixating on what men are doing/not doing and work on their own issues.
The dating game is just a shitty game to play and hard to figure out for most men.
I haven't been in "the game" for a couple of decades; but I always figured it was just so fake - two people meeting up every now and then and being on their best behaviour, thus not seeing the real person on the other side of the restaurant table. I had better things to do with my time.
I somewhat agree. But I should mention with the way society is currently we men are always walking on glass. And confidence gets destroyed by over almost Everything...😢
I just give up,I'm tired,I'm gonna live my life on my own, travel and have fun until I go down.
I’m 25 and never been in a relationship yet. High school I was 300lbs and all the negative talk from ppl really weighed me down. College was all online due to COVID. Don’t party. Started talking to this really attractive girl (22yo) 4mo ago and things started extremely well. Third date she told me she wanted to marry her 31yr old ex. Add that with she made it clear she needed to take it slow and never wanted to commit. I knew it was a red flag but I liked her and needed the experience of dates and meeting friends etc. She ended it last month (prob for the best) cuz I thought I had to lie to keep her there (and those lies eventually came out). It does suck but I’m glad I got the experience. I learned from my mistakes and will try and move on
28 years old. Personal Trainer. Never been in a serious relationship. I feel like when I connect with someone, they usually start to distance them self from me leaving me confused. I usually mirror their emotions but damn it’s hard.
This one I’ve liked since September 2023 recently broke up with her Boyfriend at the start of January and I’ve given her a ton of space and told her “go work on yourself” but man, I just want her to be mine 😔😢
She's not working on herself bro. The hot guy at the bar is. Make a move before the knot he's been working on releases or she's going to keep going back to him.
26 here, I made 60k last year welding, I hit the gym 3 times a week, I deadlift 400 and can do 22 pull ups and am great at playing guitar. I've never had a girlfriend because men have no bodily autonomy. Long story short, infant circumcision damaged my penis to the point it doesn't function as a sexual organ. What happened to me is actually not that uncommon, just most of us who it's happened to will never publicly admit it out of shame and denial.
I've rejected some fairly attractive girls that actually approached me irl because I know I'm a cripple.
Hundreds of boys die every year from circumcision in Africa. But the u.n only cares about the girls.
Man that shit brutally sad .
I've always said circumcision is terrible fr.
@@utathyamanna6435 it is what it is.
Don't say that. A girl might like you regardless of that. For some girls that won't be a major inconvenience, because they will love you for who you are. A relationship is more than just that, is about your connection, and you two can always figure out away.
You need to gain confidence, and learn that not everyone person out there is mature enough to accept other people's differences. Some girls, and guys too, might make fun of you but, they are the problem not you.
@@moon66487 It's hard to have confidence when you know you're objectively damaged goods. I will try to have more self worth though, i think you could be right about them being the problem not me since I never chose to be like this. I don't think anyone mature would make fun of someone with a disability, though I have experienced some bad shit in that way.
Either defnitely, definitely, definitely want two children, or stay single forever.
If you do not want children, do NOT enter into a "relationship" with a woman.
They are nothing but trouble.
Exactly. These guys should consider being single in this generation a gift from Heaven. The “pain” of not having a girlfriend is sweet and light compared to the undying hell of getting divorced.
@@Dominic1962
I was served with an OP first to get me booted from the home. Two weeks later, in a dive hotel, I was served with divorce papers.
I have wept every day for 500 days straight.
I have two little children, too. I never cheated, abused, etc. All I did was block my mother in law's phone number because she called my house everyday for 20 years at random times instead of using a cell phone. My wife and I stopped having sex, so it created an atmosphere of resentment. Then, my wife's sister convinced her to divorce me to try to take everything.
We were happy, too.
Divorce is far worse than death.
I do not want to be here. I am thinking of committing suicide.
@@Dominic1962
Divorce is worse than death.
@@basicprogrammer6147 In some ways, absolutely.
41 and single since my early 20's! Kabewm!
@Richard-zz7gm I know exactly what’s wrong with me. I’m fat as hell and ugly as shit by conventional standards. 😂
@Richard-zz7gm ah well, good for those guys! And hopefully those women too, if the men are good and honest.
As for the rest of your comment, it's a bit random. It almost reads like advice! Which would be a weird plot twist considering the previous comments lol
@Richard-zz7gmits all about looks now
@Richard-zz7gm where can i find these good quallity women then
Self doubt will destroy a man’s confidence but if you go for it and even get rejected you’ll still have that satisfaction of coming out of you’re comfort zone
Its hard to let your guard down if you keep getting hurt when you do
What about guys like me who are literally twice that age, (I'm 50), and have constantly been told by numerous women over the decades that I'm "ugly, creepy, scary, disgusting, hideous, pathetic, useless", etc., etc., even though I am always the nicest, friendliest, most positive energy, helpful, happy, and Loving Soul and Spirit that you'd ever even imagine IF you actually were to take the time to really get to know the real ME on the inside, but since I have an asymmetrical face, no teeth, and I'm balding, apparently I'm just not physically attractive enough to deserve Love from anyone else besides myself, so that is all I can do.
And I would NEVER make a video of myself showing my face to the world, because I already know that the majority of the comments would just be people making fun of my looks... Either that or just feeling "sorry" for me in some insincere way... So I don't even bother with that, I just stay private and do my own thing, with many nerdy hobbies and such. That keeps my mind and Spirit occupied and content at least.
Same for me but im 25 my face doesnt look good so im fucked
I think we hear this all the time but **beauty is subjective**..
we are all attracted to different looks
and finding someone that appreciates what you may think to be flaws is the best you can do.
I have no idea what you look like, but even if I did, my opinion doesn't matter as much, because it's an opinion and there's over 3.85 billion women on this planet, some would say you're steaming hot and others would say you're downright ugly
and maybe you aren't very attractive in terms of society's beauty standards today. Be content with what you've been given, come to terms with what you have because it won't change unless you get surgical procedures.
Own it, by own it I don't mean be delusional and say I'm the hottest man on earth but accept what's right in front of you and surround yourself with people that do the same. As a teenage girl, I'm trying to practice self love and acceptance and it's good you're practicing it yourself
and if women don't like it boohoo..
I'm sure you'll find your person
@@k5ylaa Thanks for the kind words, and Yes; we should ALL have self Love at the very least, while also doing whatever we can to constantly improve ourselves in whatever ways we can, however... I don't think you understand just how many dozens, (probably more like hundreds), of times that I've heard women who are just being polite say those exact words to me, but meanwhile, NEVER being interested in me personally themselves enough to actually go out on a date with me, OR even give me their phone number, so I get it, it's fine, it is what it is, but after this many decades of absolutely ZERO ACTUAL, TRUE interest in me from ANY woman who's ever interacted with me in any way, I've just pretty much totally given up and went completely MGTOW now. I definitely don't miss the continual rejection, that's for sure, and I'm all but totally DONE with it ALL by now, with the VERY slight thought of a chance that MAYBE someday, somewhere, there MIGHT actually be a woman who can actually see past my "hideous" external flaws, and actually be able to notice AND appreciate my inner Spirit qualities MORE than she is turned off by my physical looks... I definitely don't hold my breath waiting around for or even looking for a woman like that, but I still try to keep an open mind and heart to the 1 in a billion or so chance that she might come my way AND we both take notice of each other in a good way... We'll see what the future brings, but in the meantime, I've come to the ability to be totally fine and happy completely single and alone.
@@JoeJ-8282 I think anyone that is jst trying to be nice would try to comfort you. What's portrayed in the media can create unrealistic standards of how someone should look. Because of that there are lovely souls who do more good than harm that are judged and stereotyped because of their appearance. So I see why you're kind of opting out
so I wish you well, and if you do not find yourself person I still hope you have a blessed life. :)
@@k5ylaa You too, as you seem like you're trying your best to be better than the mass majority of modern women, so you must've been raised right, with good moral values and respect for others, which is truly good to see, especially from someone your age!...
Whatever you do when you get past HS, please don't ever become just another 304, jumping from one random "Chad" to another while you're "young and free", and then decide later on in your mid 30's or whatever that you want to finally "settle down" and find a good guy for a LTR... Guys don't find that life behavior attractive at ALL in a woman, because then you've had so many failed "situationships" by the time you come to the realization that you want something more than just that, that at that point you're just considered "used goods", which is NOT wife material, so be very selective and consider a guy's ENTIRE character and Spirit too, not just his looks, and find a truly Good Spirited, High Quality, Loving, REAL Man early on in your life, to be your life partner, into the future, (before you've had too MANY partners, which reduces your ability to properly pair bond with any one of them!), and then once you've got that truly good guy, take the time and energy and effort to fully develop a TRUE connection and really deep level bond with him, AND stick with him through the inevitable tough times too and make it work together for the long term, and then if you guys decide to develop a family together later then you'll already know how to deal with life's ups and downs together as a truly Loving couple, which will in turn make for being better parents to your future kids if you do have any...
Best of luck to you into your future life adventures!... :)
Let me speak from experience on thi. I'm 22 and have only ever had 1 close girlfriend. After things happened, I was going though the world seeing girls smear guys for asked for a date, for not asking for a date, for doing what their girlfriend wanted them to do, and for not doing what their girlfriend wanted them to do. Yes, it might be sad to see guys who are 25+, good looking, etc, but are single. But, it isn't though lack of trying. How many time could you hear no from people you find attractive and would like to get to know better? Because I can greentree that the majority of those guys were put down harshly too many times and have given up because they could never get a chance
Bold of you to assume that it’s a lack of confidence. Ever consider past trauma or abuse? Most men are hesitant because they don’t know how they’ll be treated. I can tell you right now that’s the exact case with me and that’s why I’m now 21 and have never even gotten into the talking phase when it comes to pursuing a relationship and building a connection.
It's lack of confidence including the experience of actually achieving the answer of what they don't need.
23 years old and never had a girlfriend . The thing is, I’ve been trying my best to get girls but I always screw up by either doing or saying things that subconsciously turns them off . To be honest , the only way I’ve gotten rejected is ONLY by being told “ I have a boyfriend “ . It just doesn’t work on me no matter what I do. At this point I give up since it just won’t work for me and I’ll keep focusing on my self development.
Never show interest on a woman if you are not consistent. It's not your fault. This society is sick in irresponsibility. Real white men are not allowed to take political control.
"Just find yourself, bro. It's ez."
Yes, and 'finding yourself' is achieved by doing what, exactly? Nobody will tell me. I haven't gotten a single answer on how to find myself. No emails, no postcards, not even a brick with a piece of paper tied to it flying through my windows. People always say that finding yourself is a subjective experience. So noone could tell me how to 'find myself' and 'find a way to be comfortable in my own skin'. How do you get comfortable in your own skin? If money, status, and having things to do isn't 'finding yourself' then what the hell does 'find yourself' even mean?! None of this makes sense, and everyone who tells me this over and over again can get fucked! Find myself?!?! FUCKING WHERE DUDE??!? HE'S RIGHT HERE! Sitting typing away, looking to youtube for answers because he can't stop fumbling! I can't even focus on a single thought at a time there's too much! It's too much! What does all this stuff even mean!?
Ask yourself these questions: why do you do what you do? Why are you interested in what you're interested in? Why do you have the friends you have? Why do you have the job you have?
There are many more questions.
And be brutally honest with yourself. And be prepared to not like some of your answers!
Money + Status + Looks is something gained in order to be honoured by other people..
"Finding yourself" is to honoured by yourself. The best way to find yourself is to observe and analyse
To be comfortable with your own skin you have to first see and understand what your own skin looks like..
so take some time for a journey, as the previous question says, "ask yourself these questions".. this will help you gain an understanding of who you are as a person. Use past experiences to also help you come to a conclusion such as your childhood that can help reveal why you do what you do up to now. Try journaling and asking yourself a few questions in the morning to kick start your day, or maybe before you sleep.. be comfortable in your own skin by reflecting on past experiences and not letting them define you, and preforming self acceptance by practicing gratitude, being thankful for the littlest things,
Once you've identified the the 5 W's, (why, what who, where, when), you can then use what you have to try out and experience new things that can help you find out what fulfills you.
and if you find that your appearance may be a problem for you, you can work on your psychical attractivness by of course doing what everyone does. Exercising, eating healthy, prioritising your mental and psychical health by getting an adequate amount of sleep
but finding yourself starts within, and only you can do it..
I'm still on that journey myself as a teenager, but I hope this helped a little bit
I'm 29 I'm virgin gonna be 30 still 😂😂😂 cause last girl I like I gave her note compliment and my number , she reply as harassment I had do deal with bunch of medieval people..
You can still be confident about yourself but also believe you have little or nothing to offer.
For example, when I was at college, plenty of my classmates said I had a high level of confidence (I was older than most of them and knew where I wanted to go in life - that's why I was there), but I sure didn't feel I had anything that the girls wanted.
You can still be confident, while working at McDonald's. But it doesn't change the fact that you work at Mcdonalds. The key is to look like someone who's one day going to own a McDonald's. And That's only done through action.
Nothing is more damning to women than seeing good guys give up. I’ve given up pursuing as well. I have no idea what women are looking for but stability, sanity, safety, spirituality, financial freedom, intelligence, ambition, independence, leadership, thoughtfulness, humility and reflection, growth mindset, and an action packed lifestyle of travel and outdoor adventure aren’t apparently it.
Oh my gosh! I would love to have a partner that is adventurous!
@@dinaf.k5372 You mean "Rich". Adventures cost money. That's literally the only thing stop the majority of people from being "adventurous".
dinaf.k5372 Say Man, not partner.
Adventures are things you don't plan, and often not good. Doing things is just tourism.
@@MilwaukeeF40C I actually dated man who was adventurous. Best time of my life and got out of depression but sadly he's married.
@@jordanharrison8769 I don't think you need to be rich in order to be adventurous. I know some rich men who are not adventurous and boring in my opinion. It depends on the person
Guys who had sisters are used to speaking to girls, much more than only boys in a family. Also, nice guys don't act spontaneously with many girls, 'cause father frightened his sons not to bother or hurt girls, when they were very young.
Yeah, my sister was a year older and a cheerleader. I conversed with many girls back in the day, unafraid, and had many pretty girls asking ME out!
I had four sisters and had a lot of female friends growing up and throughout my twenties. Any of these women that I was interested in always told me nope, we were just friends. I don't talk to any of them anymore. I'm 45 now, in great shape, and I'm still "only" 5'8" tall. If you don't check off multiple boxes for a modern woman, they are just not interested. The punch list is too long, and that's one big reason why so many single men are out there. If you're not top 20% in a woman's eyes, they won't even think about talking to you.
Those cheekbones, that neck, and them lips keep me coming back. Good brain too.
Plus you have a LOT of time. Especially in your twenties. I was pretty good at occupying myself, single and 25 and I had No doubt that it was just going to be the running theme for the rest of my life. But stuff happens, it turns out! There's a lot of time and 25 is not even close to old. Even if you feel that way now. And here's a thought! You can be in a relationship and still lonely and lacking connection and depth and self-worth.
"And lean all the way into it". That stuck with me. I no longer care anymore. Although I'm still single, I can tell the difference and also how happy I've been when I just don't care about a women's opinion anymore. I don't care what they think of me, and I don't care about them either. It truly allows me to just be myself without feeling like every moment around a women is a test. When I'm being myself. It seems like my energy just radiates and people love it.
Your Contant really gives me encouragement I can’t thank you enough
The comments section is more helpful and empathic towards men. I like reading the support. We've always been told that we're not good enough. We've also been ignored and rejected a lot. It takes a toil.
I feel like many of them have probably seen the unrealistic expectations on the dating apps and got discouraged.
Happily, I was able to find someone I was attracted to who didn't throw up all the red flags I wanted to avoid.😂
She really calling me out here 😂
You're totally right, confidence and belief in yourself is key. Especially knowing who you truly are and we all have something to offer.
i like how your content is back to helpful and positive with actionable advice. You are right on here, but maybe missing that these guys probably have gotten rocked and never recovered. would love to see something about that tbh. keep it up
In my opinion, the dating game is so broken that you either get lucky or not. There is no proven method because what may have worked now may not work in the future. That’s a simple fact. I think both men and women need to really be honest with themselves and ask why they want a relationship to begin with. Is it sex? is it companionship? is it to get married and build a family? Are there other ways to achieve those? why do you want it to happen your way?
Mindset is everything.
I’m a girl of 22 y.o., I’ve had two “boyfriends”, but this was in teenage years & lasted for 1-2 months each lol. In my “adult” years I’ve never had a relationship and I’ve been rejected even on going for coffee. That didn’t do anything to my self esteem tho, on the opposite, I feel how I grow from every experience and how I’m healing.
I really don’t know what’s the matter with men fearing rejection. Like someone not liking you back doesn’t determine your self worth, at all. It just means they’re not into you for their complicated reasons. Maybe they are already having a deeper connection with someone else, and you have no right to ruin it; maybe they were hurt enough by someone in the past. We never know a person’s heart. Also maybe it’s the best if you get rejected and don’t engage in toxic relationship.
A lot of ppl had plenty of “relationship”, but those were all only hurtful and destructive. It’s easier to learn to love someone from the scratch, than to re-learn how to trust.
Just be confident, bro.
Honestly, im secure in who i am, my issue is the plethora of stories that exist of men approaching women and getting called creeps. I dont have people at work, when im in my hobby places the women are either, nonexistent, with a dude, or "shields up" like both headphones in and obviously focused on the task and online dating is just a cesspool. I was finally gonna have a decent opportunity on valentines cause i got tickets to a mixer at a place i enjoy and of course for the first time in 3 years im deathly sick this week. Im 25 and i had 1 long term relationship that started in college and now meeting someone feels like an impossible task.
The little microphone cracks me up. 😅
I love that you are in my algorithm. All of your content is soo accurate. You are very in tune with what you say.
Keep up the great work :)
As for the men who see this.. don't stop building your self up and being the man who you want to be. Be unapologetically genuine, resilient, and awesome! 😎
Thank you for not blaming women for their nonexistent confidence. I 100% believe that if you're a good, fun person, you will find another good, fun person to love. Imagine blaming men in general for some girls being self conscious and insecure.
Solid advice, boys.
As a guy who was completely rocked by his last relationship I get this. There are a lot of cliches statements that one can make about snapping out of depression/rejection/heart break but at the end of the day most of it comes down to time. Just focus on yourself and your hobbies for a bit and don’t worry about anything else. 25 is really young, you got plenty of time to figure it out and find someone. Also, someone always has it worse than you so appreciate what you have and gamble with the cards that were dealt.
I am a girl and I feel this way it’s all self-concept. You need to look into like manifestation self-concept all of that. I’m literally 35 and I’ve only ever kissed man when I was drunk I guess I was out on a date in the Bahamas but that’s the only date I guess a date when I was 21, but I felt that I was too ugly. Who is embarrassing
It's not lack of confidence. It's the high probability of a false accusation that would undoubtedly have legal consequences.
Passport Bros to the Airport ✈
@Richard-zz7gmJust don't back with them.
the unrealistic expectations western men have for non-western women is quite different to reality. Youll mature when you realise even continents like Asia have women that are just like the western women you're trying to escape from, they just speak a different language, different upbringings and culture. You're still going to be seeing materialistic women, toxic women and all sorts..
especially if you obviously look foreign you can be either a green card, a one way ticket to financial stability and opportunities or love. You can find love anywhere even from the country you're in, so instead of generalizing all western women and deluding yourself into thinking they're all bad, and that non-western women are lovely darlings that only want you for love do understand, with the invention of social media, and influence it had on people out of western countries, don't expect a huge difference
all I can say is if you want a women from Asia or something, treat her well, and understand your poor is her rich, with that don't manipulate or exploit her because you have the upper hand
Im a king who doesn't need a queen. Ill rule my kingdom with an iron fist alone.
I learned this the other day. If you hate yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself. You’ll project those feelings onto others. You’ll treat them like they hate you until they eventually do. You need to learn to accept and love yourself. Believe in your own capabilities. Even if it takes what you believe to be
lying to yourself. If you tell yourself you’re bad with women you’ll be bad with women. Literally just start telling yourself that you’re good with women. It won’t be everything you need but it’s a great start.
I promise you its not only them not being confident, its also not wanting to be perceived as a creep if they thought something was a hint and it wasn't.
In the end all that matters in your work and family. Love and emotions can be dealt with later. Fullfill your responsibilities fellas.
Good news is it’s all about feeling good the older you get
I'm going to paraphrase from Chris Williamson's interview with Robert Glover - "One of the most attractive things is a man who is comfortable in his own skin, knows where he's going and looks like he's having fun going there." Another interview Chris did, with a man whose name escapes me at the moment, added that if you only have one of those things - Comfortable in your own skin, know where you're going and/or have fun - you're going to attract some people.
Also, speaking from experience, your mind can and will screw you over unless you do some soul searching. You can be the cringiest mf out there and not even be aware of it, because your mind tells you you're not doing anything wrong and it's the world that's at fault when things go sideways. And I wholeheartedly agree that finding your true self and leaning into it is the way to go.
Last time I've liked a girl and told her that I like her and I wanted to be in a relationship with her, she took that topic to public, started mocking me like: "look at this looser, he has feelings for me", and later called me disgusting. And by public I don't mean social media, it was all the people that were around there. After that there is no confidence left to like a girl anymore or even try, cause it's just pain for nothing. Also another one was using my feelings to get what she needs at the moment, if she didn't need anything, then I just was nothing to her.
I think women don't understand they aren't being blunt like men are. I was told a few years ago that I girl I used to like actually liked me back but didn't make her feelings known. Like damn I cant read minds.
You speak truth
Funny, my brothers once jokingly said that I'm the ugliest (of 4), but would get the prettiest girlfriends, due to my personality & character traits.
Although it didn't feel like a compliment, they were right after all. 🤓
It's true though my biggest issue that I crush hard, I wish I wasn't like this but it's how I'm wired, I've gone too many times to women that I was crushing on to be told that I wasn't enough, I have been working on myself though, but it doesn't make my confidence any higher it's hard, but unfortunately I know that I need to get over it and keep trying
Part of it is being treated like a creepy stalker by women who aren't willing to give them a chance to hold a conversation
She cried. Because she said it with a sad voice.
I spent my entire high school life being called fat and ugly by guys and girls. Now 3 years later ive lost over 100 lbs and look better. The problem is i cant talk to women, im terrified to approach because i dont want what little confidence ive built up to get demolished by some random woman
I’m 19 and have never had a gf. I’m at least a little on the younger side and still trying my best to self improve and meet girls
You still have time. 😭 but understand self improvement doesn't jst mean go to the gym, earn six figures, be confident. It also means developing and maturing mentally
by getting out of the victim mentality and realising that society isn't the main cause for your problems. By this I mean, as you grow, rejection will hurt like a bitch, failed relationships will feel like the world is ending. but don't allow that to make you bitter and hold hate deep inside. Trial and error is amazing, and some things just aren't meant to be.
As a 16 year old I see a lot of older men hold hate for women, they end up bitter despising women and giving up on dating. I just hope that this new generation of men can be kind hearted
@@k5ylaai wouldn’t hold your breath
If these videos are sad. Then my life story would make the world cry. And in the end happy. I will write a book one day about it.
Yeah social skills is an issue but at the same time being socially inept is usually due to a lack of social opportunities directly out of highschool if you don’t go the college route which a lot of people don’t
Im 26 and single, i fully understand where these guys are coming from. I noticed a big changed when i stopped giving a shit, but not in a sort of "im never talking or looking at a girl ever again" mode but more "itll happen when it happens. I put every attractive girl on a pedistal all my life, now i just go with the flow and see what happens. Im not looking for a one night stand. Im looking for a life partner. Im the picky one. She isnt better than me. Ever since i molded this approach to life ive noticed a lot more girls giving me attention in more obvious ways. I managed to find one that is gorgeous and doesnt do things like one word me in order to get me to kiss her fucken feet and do what she wants. And if it doesnt work out ill carry on but retain my dignity because ill never fall pver backwards for a girl again unless she ends up being the mother pf my children and the heart of my home. This wont help many of you, but it might some. I hope you keep your chin high, your mputh shut and your heart warm. Never stop. You've got this brother 💪
Im 35 and I never had a girlfriend 😅
Why do I get the feeling your looks are not the problem
One thing I trully hate about being a Single guy in his 20s is the fact that all my female family members and Aquitances think that its so easy to find a girl These days . Or even worse that its easy to cope ("Just spend time whith family and get over your loneliness ") this makes me feel sick . In the same time they accusing me of being picky but have a list of requariments that my future girlfriend shoud have !
It's a number game. Get out there. Start with a heavy one to build confidence.😂
This is a big, complex issue. And, unfortunately, the only strat that will work here is blunt, simple, and miserably difficult.
The problem is confidence. Since their school days, men have been tanking hit after hit, being denigrated for their natural inclinations, being male in general, and by endless comparisons to their female counterparts. The sheer volume of single-mother homes not teaching men to have self respect while teaching them that all they have to do to be nice is astounding, and the same homes telling daughters to never settle for less than perfect and telling the girls never to trust men isn't helping. MeToo is terrifying. Being silenced by women on so many topics is scary. I get it and I agree.
But Billie is right that figuring out who you are and unapologetically being that person is the only strat that will work. Don't ever, *EVER* become the person she wants you to be. She doesn't know who she wants you to be, only that she wants things to conform to what she feels. The world is forever and a day catering to her, and she expects you to do so, too. Don't. Be you. Be skilled, capable, and happy in your own right. Decide for yourself what you will and what you won't tolerate, and hold yourself and all people in your life to those standards.
I like to ask the following questions of a guy that is asking what these guys are: Can you sew a button back on a shirt and iron it? can you demonstrate two ways to tie a tie? Can you make some basic dishes and one or two that wow people? Do you have two or more skills typically associated with men (automotive, carpentry, woodworking, metalworking, appliance repair, HVAC, etc.) Do you know how to keep your house clean and do it?
Why would I ask this? Because if you don't *need* someone to do all of these things, you are self-sufficient. You don't have to rely on anyone else. When you don't need a person, but want them in your life, you can look at them more objectively, and see the red flags you tend to ignore if you are afraid of her getting away. You also bring some things to the table when you do meet a good woman. Having things to put on the table means that you can reasonably expect the same from her, and this will help you identify the women who just intend to take.
Is this going to be fun? No. It's going to be a good bit of work on your part, and you'll be doing it alone. Does this feel like the girls you meet are waiting at the finish line to pick the winners? Sure. But if we are being fair with ourselves, asking a woman to like us for who we are means having something to "who we are" that is enticing.
I am able to do a lot of simple repairs on appliances, furniture, vehicles, and computers. I can make a few basic dishes like grilled cheese with tomato soup and quesadillas, and I can make so many varieties of sushi that it will make your head spin (and learned how to pronounce them in Japanese so I have a topic of discussion!) I can sew buttons back on and make some seams that separate serviceable. I can tie a tie five different ways (including making one serve as bow tie!), polish shoes, make costumes, build models, design and construct furniture with special features (seriously, my gaming table is pretty cool), and 3D print. EVERY last thing I can do was a combination of CZcams learning and the temerity to try.
Literally figure out what you like. Dive headfirst into that. Live your life worrying about being authentically yourself. Leave the passenger seat open for the girl that sees you and wants to share that trip with you, and politely ask anyone who wants to mess with the GPS and/or the radio to exit the vehicle.
In my mid 50s, and you constantly get mixed signals. Easier not to even try anymore.
Im 25 and single and I always go for it so im just bad looking i approach an everything
OK I’m going to do exactly as you say. I’ll walk up to any woman and say whatever I feel like no matter how forward, suggestive, shocking, or honest. Ooh they really hate honesty! Perhaps they need to be taught a lesson in respect or accountability. That ought to be fun!
This may sound weird - But for me who's super fit (and am always told I'm handsome) I don't know where the opportunities are and I feel like everywhere I go where there are women - they are afraid of me. Every casual attempt I make seems to backfire. I'm 28 always been single.
No, the truth is women will one of two things make you feel comfortable make you feel secure in the minute you start explaining how you feel emotionally. You’re a Simp or your weak number two play too many games today they like you tomorrow they don’t today they want you tomorrow you’re just a friend, that’s why all these guys are single because they’re tired of the jokes and the gameplay
Speaking only for myself but my awareness to this manipulative cycle I’m in keeps me idling.
I’ve only been on maybe four or five dates in my life and I’m pushing 40 and I’m still single never had a relationship and yeah I’ve been hurt multiple times trying to get online with stuff and it never panned out. I’m just tired of it.
When are you gonna write a book? I enjoy your dating philosophy and would definitely enjoy reading a book from you!
Decent women are like ghosts. They may exist, and there are plenty who claim to have met one once, but we really may never know.
The key to being an interesting person is to do interesting things.
You don’t have to extreme stuff like sky diving
Baby steps
Take a cooking class
Art class
Martial arts
Wood working
Don’t do these things for girls but for yourself.
You’ll eventually realize all this cool stuff you know how to do and you can’t help but start feeling good about yourself. And then, people around you will pick up on that positive aura around you, including girls.
Your confidence will come naturally! 😊😊❤❤❤
Be strong, be brave and be persistent fellas!
As a young man I found that the interesting things I did were - of course - very interesting to me, but not to the girls. Maybe I was doing the "wrong" interesting things, LoL?
"Dating and making friendships are harder today"
Yeah I have to add some input here. Today's modern woman don't acknowledge men. I'm almost in my mid 30s and the mother of my child still won't give me the time of day. So it really is this whole "independent" mindset some woman have that has ruined society. Honestly the whole structure of finding Love has fallen apart in today's modern world.
It's because men can't read women's subtle signs that they like them. Mostly the men are unaware that the women are hitting them up. We don't do subtle signs/hints. Tell us you like us or we'll be like: "Did she flirt with me? Naaaah, she's just being nice." And if we read your signs wrong and we take a chance we will be called toxic, creeps, and have a harassment case filed against us that ruin our career and friendships. Be more direct, ladies.
@Richard-zz7gmyeah fr
Woman don't even pick up on the subtle signs. It's just plain bad communication skills.