Is Marriage Overrated?
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 29. 08. 2024
- Is Marriage Overrated? #shorts
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What sheâs saying can happen in any relationship, married or not. Itâs about the people in the marriage
Exactly
right.......everything aligns differently, solely based on the mindset of who you're dealing with. As a supportive husband or wife can assist their spouse in being just as solid and financially stable as they are.
yep.
Nope! It canât. No other relationship âlegallyâ ties you to a person. Thanks!
It happened to me
Traditional marriage is not for everyone. First decide what you want out of life and whether or not you need a life partner to do it.
Itâs easier to walk away from a bad relationship when youâre not married. I get what she is saying.
well i think if it's a bad relationship it will show signs , at least don't rush to marriage until u r fully convinced that u can live with this person
Then stop fking MESSING with the wrong person, simple as that! It's not MARRIAGE's fault when you CHOSE the wrong person whom you did not understand or agree with!
I'm tired of hypocrites who point fingers at everything/everyone else BUT themselves! It's always Social Media, Marriage, blah blah blah..'s fault! đ
@@COMPUTER.SCIENCE. NPC logic right here
Same i agree
@@COMPUTER.SCIENCE. spoken like a true child.
abusers are very good at putting on an act. you'll find out yourself some day.
The harsh truth is that the feelings of love fade. Whatâs left is the reality of commitment. That commitment can blossom into a much deeper love that is based on the character of the other rather than on the needs of the one.
But it all begins with commitment. And when that commitment is undergirded by a ring it forces the individuals to work through the storms. There are rainbows after the storms.
Yeah, the commitment of marriage is so important. Oh wait, divorces exist. Marriage means nothing.
Absolutely.
@@sunkintree ~ "Divorces exist so marriage means nothing" ??? Death exists. So does that mean life means nothing? That's the "logic" we're going with here?
@@sunkintree nice logic bro đ
Well if bullfrogs had wings. Marriage is a legal contract to fornicate it was only ever a legal document used for exclusive sex and govt record for wealth and taxes. It's out dated and doesn't fit today's culture.
5 years ago, when I was 22, I used to think like the girl. Now, I think like her mom.
Same! I think the commitment and responsibility of marriage is true love vs not wanting to solidify the marriage because of âtrue love.â Relationships take effort AND love. Not getting married gives benefit with no commitment. I have been in a relationship for 6 years now (since I was 22/23), still no marriage, and I am thinking about ending it as my boyfriend sees it like this 22 year old- which is immature, in my opinion. I feel taken advantage of for the benefits of the relationship, whereas I want to build a life with someone!
Same. 5 years ago I was 21. Was scared of marriage and thought I will have the marriage my parents had. I thought there is no other option.
@@jolonabon omg same. I feared having my parentâs marriage. I know it doesnât have to be that way now. I will say it is hard to find someone with a large degree of compatibility and the same valuesâŠ
@@deecee7042 true. But Iâm convinced that if you keep believing that it is possible, you will find the right person for you :)
@@deecee7042 Sounds like you don't love your boyfriend. And that's okay. Him marrying you would have been a mistake.
If marriage is "being tied down" and a commitment that require you to work towards... you're not made for marriage.
Right. People these days have no idea what to prioritize
Thatâs exactly what it is. Iâm not getting into an agreement that I canât get out of without standing in some court. I donât want the government in my life. You promote marriage for your own selfish reasons, such as the continuation of society. Iâm going to do whatâs best for myself instead. I can be married without having a ring or signing stupid paperwork.
@@saehisaya not sure how procreation is selfish. Seems like a pretty selfless thing to have kids and take care of them, raise them with generous love, ect - then let them go out into the world. Yanno? Everyone seems to think ohhhh kids are a burden, ohhh what about my career and what I want to do I I I I I I ... Isn't that more self absorbed than a mother and father? Marriage also, by definition, is religiously or legally bounding.
not a bad thing
@@saehisaya who's to say we can't give children a good life? That is entirely situational. Some parents should think twice before having children, although those who shouldn't often don't think not to or they wouldn't be in the predicament that suggests they shouldn't have children in the first place. But the majority of parents who can provide a good and loving childhood for their children should absolutely have children and do so. You are obviously grateful for the gift of life that your parents gave you, or you would have checked out years ago. Further, ordering them around? As if small children can be responsible for living on their own? That is ludicrous. Put every 10 year old on the street. Let's see what happens.
I've seen so many married couples staying married for the kids, religious reasons, or lack of money. When you have 22 year olds telling you their parents should have gotten divorced when they were little tells you something. Just a note, staying together for the kids doesn't actually help them, it just makes it worse.
Exactly.
Hmm I donât know about that. My parents divorced when I was 1.5 and itâs fucked me up a bit honestly.
@@petereames3041 I guess situations are different. My parents never divorced, and that fucked me up!
@@petereames3041 how did it fuck you up if you were too young to even remember?
i agree with this. i was happy when my parents got divorced when i was 18
She's describing a bad marriage though lol
Considering 40-50% of marriages end in divorce, it wouldn't be completely unreasonable to say most marriages are bad marriages
True
@@KamuiProductsInc The ppl who stay married are not necessarily happy either. Lots of older ppl I know seem to loathe their spouses but stay together cos that's just how they were raised, divorce isn't smth they would even think of. The divorce rate isn't that high where I'm from tho.
Dude even marriage never existed you wouldnât even think about it just open youâre eyes you donât need a ring and vows to love
@@zuza_0613 how about people who get divorced, do you think they are happier?
If your marriage doesnât survive because of paper and a ring, it wouldnât have survived without it either.
Well said đ
Shit way to drop that truth next to your mom âbased on what Iâve seenâ
thats 100% why she kept looking at her mom. i think she sympathizes for her and sees her dad taking advantage of her mom and clearly doesn't want that.
its the other way around, you take the other person for granted when you're not bound by a commitment and responsibility, but ofc there are all types of marriages and not all are healthy, depends on people
That depends on the type of person you are.
â@@CCardinalchrisdisagree because married is 2 not just "you".
@@irfanberd I donât know what youâre arguing when the context is âyou take the other person for grantedâ
@@CCardinalchris Sorry ,what I still don't know is that I was arguing.but I am sorry again his majestic.
@@irfanberd an argument is an exchange of opposing views. Yes I can see you donât know what youâre arguing because your point was irrelevant to this topic
âBound by a ringâ is an outrageous statement. đ Use social media as your guide to how marriage looks and youâll def have a sour taste in your mouth about it but itâs a beautiful union when done with the right person. Mindset is everything.
đđŒ Yes. This.
It depends on people. I'm glad you have and seen good experiences with marriage, but that's not the case for everyone. This has nothing to do with being on social mediađ¶đœââïž
Bro this girl doesn't know anything
Is it the marriage thatâs a beautiful union or is it the relationship itself?
@@hamii613 social media killed honest relationships, you can swipe right mid fight these days and just leave to someone else
Let's just say people's views nowadays on marrige is a lot different than it was before
That's always happening, though. Views on marriage are constantly evolving. Pretty much every decade in the 20th century had a different outlook on marriage.
Same thing happens within the relationships too. People do not want to invest, that's the root problem. Everybody has got one foot in the relationship and the other ready to jump out
When she matures she will understand that getting married is not about being bound by a ring, itâs about commitment. The reason it can appear that marriage gets stale is because the wrong two people got married for the wrong reasons. Itâs the people, not the act of marriage that failed. Being married provides you with safety that you can be your worst self and still stand by one another
100% itâs on the people whether it fails or not. âCan be your worst self and still stand by each otherâ.. why is that? Because you canât get out easily right? And if the relationship is not working for the both of you and you canât get out easily when getting out is possibly the healthy/ right thing to do⊠is it still safety then?
And if you were commited to the person before marriage, stayed together for years before deciding to get married because you wanted to be sure this was the right person⊠is the commitment really starting at marriage? Lol. No, you were already commiting to that person when you decide to stick with them x amount of years, and can continue doing so if you are that type of person, with or without marriage.
Peoples justification for marriage is very flawed.
If marriage was only for an emotional ride, then what these two women said makes sense. Your comment supports what I am getting at about marriage and about what these emotional ride takers say about marriage.
No, when you mature, you will realize you dont need a contract to love someone.
Thats your opinion and i totally disagree with it
â@@umarnca absolutely đŻ
As someone whose worked for a Divorce lawyer, marriage comes in real handy if things go south as well as an iron clad Pre-nup lol
I waited until I was 30 to get married. It just depends on the person. I personally needed to learn some lessons and find myself before I got into my relationship at 27 with my now husband and Iâm 35. I travelled alone abroad and volunteered, saved money, went to therapy, finished university. I needed therapy prior to getting into a healthy relationship.
Bro, you fucked with Chads and Tyrons when you were in your 20's and then when you reached in your 30's, you find a nice beta who could take care of you and financially provide for youđđCheers for that beta who got a ran through
âââ@@Sigmaasphere who hurt you đ You know I am still single and virgin. I am in my 30's and not married. No intention of getting married soon either . The reason is I have to recover from my emotional trauma first . Don't judge . You don't know what she might be going through . Some people have been raised by abusive parents . They need time to heal . If you can think of her of fucking others then why can't you think of her getting dumped by a boyfriend or cheated by a boyfriend đ
Marriage is a job contract. Not a feelings contract. The job is to share the drudgery of chores and parenting, buffer health and financial ups and downs. Feelings help you decide who you will partner with. But its really a job of showing up every day. If you are not ready for the job, it wont work out.
Thanks for the clarification, that is exactly what everyones trying to avoid in life.
I'll never understand people that get married and have a child straight after high school.
They literally will never live an independent life until the day thet die.
They won't realise it until they realise they're locked.
Get married or don't get married. To each, her own!
Exactly, I don't see why both can't be ok, depending on each person and what they like/want/need. I wonder if it's so hard to understand that not everyone want the same, or reach "fulfillment" the same way. Maybe I need marriage or see it as something special, doesn't mean that someone else can't feel great in other ways or it has to be just as amazing for them too. The only true, generally speaking objective benefits I see in marriage, are the legal ones.
âHerâ own. Because is all about her big day! Yay!
Itâs not easy just to go out and find the right person to marry. People should marry as they find the person they feel that they could live a lifetime with.
When I was with my person for 18 yrs or so and I went to the hospital for something small, they treated him like a stranger. He had no rights, no opinion nothing. That freaked me out, so we eventually got married. We didnât make a deal of it though. We didnât obligate anyone, spend a ridiculous amount of money, we went to city hall and that was that and we were ok with it.
-Recently thank goodness he had the better insurance, I did end up needing surgery, plus reconstruction. Decent insurance does matter too people (wether itâs you or your partner or both!), especially as you age and living in the US! But my spouse took amazing care of me when I needed him most.
I was afraid of marriage because my parentâs had a toxic one. But me and my spouse are better at being married. Heâs a better partner and I think I am as well, we are closer actually, plus NO kids!
That being said when everyone and society tries to pressure you, tell them to f off! Itâs non of anyoneâs business! No itâs not for everyone of course and you should not feel pressured or obligated. Best
-I think this girl is full of it though, they always are. By the time sheâs 40 sheâll have 5 kids and filing for divorce đ.
Sorry this is long! đ
I knew since I was a kid that I wanted to be married. I love being married. I grew up in a broken home and started making notes since I was 4 years old of the things I would avoid to have a good husband. Mostly I realized that all of my moms came from my dad being a problem alchoholic and that he physically beat her, but tgey were both neurotic often screaming at the top of their lungs at each other for weeks straight. I have been happily married now with my dream man and its all because of God first of course but also because I was very logical and objective when choosing men. I love being married!
How can I find a woman like you ... all woman have changed
â@@user-cq8hw3ni7g So you can betray her???.keep sleeoing around the wonder why none of them want marriage
@@sakuraesther6309 lol she can't betray him ? See your head spinning now
@@sakuraesther6309 what happened Sakura projection much? How much jealous are of true love couples ?
â@@user-cq8hw3ni7gif you think ALL WOMEN have changed, maybe you need to start looking into MEN! It's YOUR problem, not the WOMEN's! đ€Ł
I think marriage become overrated because in the western world everything that only happened because of marriage now can be accessible without it. Like getting child certificate or living together not just the financial aspect. In most of the asian country , those thing only happened if you get married. Thats why marriage still a great deal in my country.
Exactly sis. I like your mentality. If the marriage nowhere doesn't work that much it doesn't mean that all of us have to stop from gen married
Child certificate? What is that?
Agreed. These are all western/first world problems. People are getting married very regularly in most parts of the world still because the union of family is a lot more valuable than anything else.
@@changeoffocus1074 maybe the correct term is "birth certificate"
Exactly because in the western world people do things like a marriage couple without being married I not American so in my culture you doing everything when u get married
I get that.. I never believed in marriage either.. But then I'm just very unromantic person so I just don't believe in romantic relationship in general. Marriage can be good for legal benefits I guess but otherwise no point in that for me.
I agree also marriage was never made for love anyway.
Most of the time marriage is a BIG MISTAKE, let alone the nasty divorces...FREEDOM IS PRICELESS!!đ
Totally agree with her. I feel much more loved by my partner knowing that he is still happy to come home everydays after 15 years together. Versus I have no idea how married couples know if the other one stays in the couple coz it would be too complicated to divorce. Mainly after a big argument. We are free to stay together đ€đ
divorce rate is 50%, and of those who aren't divorced, I wonder how much of those are really happy? we can commit to someone and feel that he/she is the right person. but years down the line no one can really predict what will happen. people change as time goes by, and you can't force a commitment when you know it's not working anymore. and it takes a lot of internal work to create a healthy relationship. I don't think majority of people are serious about that. divorces can be nasty, a hassle, can be traumatizing. contrary to popular belief, relationship longevity isn't the indicator of relationship success. and there's so many stories of people with difficult childhoods, from parents who didn't treat them well. marriage is no joke, it's just right to be skeptical about it.
It's the opposite for me, if someone have a relationship without the "ring" bond they'll take their partner for granted because if one of them make a mistake it'll be easier to walk off instead of doing papers for the divorce.
But then again everything can happen in any form of relationship, some walk off while they're married to their partners, some stay forever with their partners for ages even without tying the knot
Soooooo.. what your saying is you'd rather have them go through turmoil before they leave. Noted.
ââ@@SC68170 it's not "THEM", only the wicked ones who deceived their partners from the beginning (without wanting a commitment) should worry about divorce, other than that, what turmoils are you talking about? There are always turmoils when people break up, they don't just break up in happiness, idiot! Marriage PROTECTS COMMITTED people's right: if you don't want to try to commit, STOP wasting my time by deceiving tactics and get the fk OUT of my life, simple message as that!
@@SC68170 Hahaha spot on!
I see her point but the issue isn't marriage itself but more so the people involved and how they view marriage. If two people aren't trying to make it work whether they're married or not, no relationship can actually flourish.
Exactly. The problem isnât marriage⊠itâs the inability to think of someone outside of yourself enough to make a life long commitment to be there for them. Itâs all about what makes people feel good, and self. No compromise, no sacrifice⊠no commitment. Just living for yourself.
â@@claudiag.3036Amen đâ„ïž
â@@claudiag.3036 What is wrong with that??Are you orotecting these people who have terrible experiences???
@@claudiag.3036what is this emotional nonsense? Living for yourself requires compromise and responsibility too. Stop smoking crack and come back to reality.
@@saehisaya If thatâs not the pot calling the kettle black. Youâre all emotions over there with your âstop smoking crackâ immature response. Spin it any way youâd like. Itâs your life. âđŒ
Being married has certain legal benefits. That is something to consider if you want to live with that person.
Yeah, all benefits for women and none for men.
@@childfreesingleandatheist8899
MGTOW monk for the past 7 years.
God loves you my brother. Return to giving thanks to your Creator.
@@childfreesingleandatheist8899 cope live alone with your cats and stop replying to every comment
It has no legal benefits for me as a man . Most tax benefits which are very little are consumed because of higher expenses .
it can also have disastrous consequences
100% agree. Donât fall for the fairy tale, people!
Everything she said is true,
If you reaaallly love someone and receive the same love in return then there's no need to get married.
But if you don't, then what's the point of getting married?
if you truly love someone why would marriage change that?
I donât get it either. Itâs sad that people see it as ruining the relationship. I guess it all depends on the example thatâs been set for you. đ
because true love is super difficult to achieve and marriage increases the chance of falling apart by somewhat shutting the backdoor; making the divorce very costly.
People tend to underestimate the power of formal commitment.
In fact, "love" as a motivation for marrying someone is a relatively new concept in the history of people.
With that said, marriage is not just a love business between two individuals. It's a social contract.
@@jhhxxvii I feel like the root of all of this is fear. Fear of commitment, fear of failure, fear of sacrifice, fear of compromise⊠which in a way I donât think is necessarily a bad thing bc marriage should be taken seriously & respected. Itâs just sad to me that itâs seen so negatively.
@@ahmoseh3718 Iâm so sorry. đ My husband had a dirt bag of a father who was abusive & then absent most of his life. That motivated him to be everything that man refused to be. I applaud any man that is devoted to his family, and to God.
Very true .
Married 38 years and going strong. Love my wife more than anything and she loves me the same!. We've been through alot over the years, hard times and wonderful times. When you work through the hard times together it makes it even better. We have a great life together and that young lady is clueless.
that was the best response she could ever hear!đ
What's that got to do with those rings on your fingers?
@@someoneinthecrowd4313 That ring reminds him of his wife and the bond he has with his wife. It reminds him that there is person loving him and who he is in love with.
Hey uncle, every one had not what you had in your life... so things could be different right? let them decide
Or she could be sleeping with someone behind youâre back u just never know
I agree with the mom.
I think if you really care about someone then youâd want to commit to them and be bound to them. Not getting married doesnât guarantee a relationship will work and also getting married doesnât mean it will cause the relationship to fail. It doesnât seem right to just stay with someone if you never plan to get married. You just need to be at the right time in your life and with the right person.
"if you really care about someone then you would want the government to enforce your committment"
Nothing says "love" more than "government forced committment"!!
you clearly donât understand the process of marriage and divorce
I'm so confused why people choose to focus on whats wrong in a relationship and not the good stuff.
New woke Western culture
whats good about it?
Because people are waking up and realizing that there are bad components to a relationship.
Becoz people love FAST FOOD these days! They just want GET IN, then GET OUT quick! So picking out the bad things is just an excuse to legitimate themselves to keep getting more FAST FOOD!
@@saehisaya You can find the bad in just about anything. However, after being married for going on 13 years, I will tell you this. Romantic relationships force you to grow. Some people are not about that life, so they say the relationship is the problem and find every way to blame the institution. It's like blaming the government for being corrupt. Is it the government corrupt or is it the people?
Well since divorce rate is usa is like 50% young kid is right đđđđđđ
Society is going down the drain.
Society never came out of the drain. đđ
She's right... religious or whatever people who are here comment like marriage is everything... every one has a right to choose to get married or living together or even being single. so what's the big deal
Whose making you marry, no one! You can live to a ripe old age if your fortunate and die with no man or children to call family apart from your parents or friends family! But, If I were to say you could marry, Iâm not hurting not anyone either, by saying that, any more than you are saying, Iâm not hurting anyone if I donât. Use your own logic.
Looks like mile wants to end up living with cats đ đ» at 40
Totally agree đđ„° , marriage is not worth getting into when there is the chance of getting out of
People donât seem to understand marriage is not just about a ring and being bound. There are other reasons to get married, when you have kids youâll both get equal rights to have custody over them when youâre married. When you buy a house and one of the partners passes away, itâs easier to get the house and mortgage transferred over to the other person. There are tons of other legal examples
Easier, sure but there are workarounds for each scenario. I used to work in real estate and you can buy a house with another person. Each US state has different laws but generally, you can sign up together with 1 or more persons. Could be equal owners with flexible or set pieces (tenancy in common vs joint tenancy).
For kids, have a power of attorney to let spouse have same power as you in your stead. write a will down and/or have a life trust to avoid probate. Medical power of attorney for when you're medically unconscious and have spouse make decisions for you.
For insurance, you can usually add another adult to your plan or they can add you to their plan. Add whoever as your beneficiary to inherit whatever you have.
On the flip side, divorce can be heinous, especially if children are involved. Happens every 13 seconds. Bankruptcy sometimes results. Depending on the how the split with your spouse went, the lawyer you hired and how the presiding judge decides, you may never see your children again.
I'm for marriage and trust my fiancee. But we know the reality.
â@@FableCountrythe point is, why do I need to get around? When both people happily want the marriage, why the need to "GET AROUND" instead of just USING THAT GIVEN RIGHTS? Becoz of ZOMBIES like you whose AGENDA is to ABOLISH that RIGHTs??
I'm with the girl. I have never witnessed a happy marriage in my entire life. I'm 37 years old. Plus, I've never even been with someone and thought "man, I love you so much. Let's go sign documents so we can be contractually bound".
Thatâs sad. You need to change your surroundings and find the right people. I say it respectfully. I have seen happy marriages, not perfect! But happy, like in any relationship, thereâs gonna be problems but youâll have your partner to help you solve them. Iâm 35 and Iâve been married for 12 years, I love my husband every year a little more. We have grown together, build together, cry, laugh, learn, experience, etc etc.
You just gotta find the right person. If you wish to get married, of course.
Me too! I ADORE my independence and I personally donât see it for myself however I respect that other people believe in it
@@andreaelizabethpadillaramo4595 đ
Yeah, keep surrounding yourself with those problematic folks, and then conclude that this world is full of wacked. Nice troll! đ
@@COMPUTER.SCIENCE. while youâre surrounded with delusional folks who believe in imaginary friends in the sky. Its called fake positivity. đ
Marriage takes commitment which takes maturity. If you are with someone who says "i don't need a piece of paper to commit to you" run don't walk..its an excuse
Exactly! đ
You can also interpret it as, âI donât need a piece of paper to tell me to stay with youâ
Why get married if you are both truly happy with eachother? What will mariage add that isnât already there?
Idk I still believe in marriage and all that, but married couples Iâve met in their 40s, 50s and so on are kind of miserable. Like I donât even know itâs if worth it anymore đ€·đ»
When I was younger I did think the same way, but now I can see I was wrong. Marry later in life, but to the right person.
:D I never really found the silly things of youth appealing.
there's no right person lol
@@jinfin221 well, if marry first guy who is interested in you chances are that it wonât work, right? Her mom is right. Itâs better to marry later as you get more experience and you know yourself then you know what you are looking for in the relationship. This is what I mean; not every guy is right for you, some you should definitely avoid and some have same goals and same interests as you, so they are right for you:) If you mean there is no perfect man then yes, I can agree with you on that.
@@Haechi-v6y I mean what if we don't want to find one to marry đđ
@@jinfin221 thatâs ok too:), but it may change with age. I think.
Glad to see the younger generation analyze the archaic idea of marriage through a discerning lens instead of through hearts, rainbows, butterflies rose colored glasses. 50% of marriages end in divorce, those are the odds of flipping a coin.
Taking your partner for granted also occurs outside of marriage, LOL. Marriage is definitely hard but the benefits can be amazing if both people are willing to invest.
I LOVE this young woman!
That is exactly what I think about marriage as well!
I wish that will find someone like her for myself. đ
Marriage is a life experience just like having kids but not everyone is required to sign up
She's describing a majority of marriages! I have so many married men hitting on me thinking I want to be their side piece, it automatically disgusted me. I also know many married women that cheat on their husbands. Marriage doesn't change or prevent anything. đ€·ââïž
Iâm on the fence about marriage. Iâm 35, never been married. I used to want to be married and have a family but unfortunately kept getting into relationships with time wasters who would promise marriage and a family but kept pushing it back and avoiding talking about it and making excuses so I left the relationship after 4 years of waiting, then I got into another relationship with another time waster who did the same thing but I didnât lose as much time 2 years, still a good amount of time when you are on a biological clock that is counting down very loudly in your ear every day. So my entire 20s was wasted and I ended up having an unplanned pregnancy at 33 by someone who was good at hiding how horrible of a person he was (hes now living with my ex best friend) so now Iâm a single mom and I am happy to have my daughter although it breaks my heart that she doesnt have a father figure in her life. I tried. đą
Iâm completely out of the game now and will be for a good while or until my daughter is old enough and mature enough that she will be okay without my full undivided attention if I were to take some Me time and wouldnât feel neglected or abandoned in any way. Besides, anyone I date would have to accept me and my daughter as a package deal and that is rare I think. I know that plenty of guys date women with kids but do they really accept the kid as part of the equation or do they treat the kid like an in the way thing to have to work around? I wont have any of that. If we are going on a date, itâs including the kid and weâre making it fun for her. Hence why ill be out of the game for a good while. Im not sure ill find that.
I have almost an identical situation. 1 six year relationship, 1 two year relationship (we were friends much longer). The promise of marriage never happened. Got accidentally pregnant. Got married and divorcedâŠ. I am spent the past few years working on myself and my kids. I will say that I have met someone I am crazy about⊠but my personal experiences make me not want to get married.
@@aliciaarroyo6 i feel you on the hesitation and dont blame you. I would feel the same way. I did meet someone I was crazy about as well but he unfortunately passed away last year unexpectedly so Iâm also still processing that. I still feel so loyal to him :(
@@TheSevonne aw. I am sorry to hear that. That would be so difficult. Hopefully heâs looking down on you from heaven and send you someone đ
You need to take a class to DETECT "deceiving" people đ€Ł and maybe work on yourself more to not be attracted to people not in your league? When you fully understand yourself and what you want, you'll find the person who fits your need, then marriage would just come naturally. Don't try to force it, but at the same time, don't keep jumping from 1 relationship to another! Take a break, take the time for yourself, and wait until the right one comes along!
Better to break up an go your separate ways and not have to go through a divorceâ
Lol meanwhile I met my husband when i was 17 and he was 19. Three months after we started dating, we knew we were getting married. Iâm 30 and heâs 32 we are still going strong!
Wait a couple of more years, when you realize all you missed out on. Oops!
@@umarncawhat
"From what I've seen." My parents marriage sucked but I never believed mine would. Happily married 20 years now. Married when I was 25.
And this is the reason you call older people mature
Just because you're mature doesn't mean ur always right
Any relationship can be taken for granted. Even platonic relationships. Young lady you need to be careful.
She is careful
Their point of view is the reflection of their experiences. Idk why the girl said that but for sure, no paper & ring has the power to change the dynamics of a relationship until and unless you make it affect your dynamics. If you truly fall in love with someone, marriage is nothing but a ritual and a practice to celebrate your bond/relationship. There's no harm. She didn't mention why she won't choose to get married but maybe it's because of legal bondation etc
I agree with the girl! Marriage doesn't change anything, it's just a piece of paper and doesn't stop your husband/wife from cheating on you or leaving you. Divorces are always messy and costly. I'm 36, I was married once, it didn't last but my relationship after that had been a decade already. My partner wanted to get married in the beginning and I was like I rather not because I don't see the point in getting married again but my partner respected it and our relationship has been good!
Marriage is a civil union. You build a family and wealth with your partner. Not to mention time spent, youth spent, options lost. Marriage guarantees certain rights & protections for a spouse and any children from the union. In matters of life & death, the longtime boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't count for much. Don't waste your time or make yourself disposable.
phuck marriage nothing but a trap for men with nothing to gain if it heads down divorce route
It's totally natural not believing in the institution of marriage. You can be absolutely fine and happy just living the way you lived. No problem, no need to change. Just one way of life that should be respected and not judged. It actually seems common globally among young ppl
I decided to never marry or have a relationship. Single is great
The problem with traditional marriage is that we donât live in a traditional society. People can change their minds at any moment no matter who you find. Itâs not as simple as âjust find the right oneâ. People change which makes marriage way too risky nowadays.
It seems like we all want to get married while we are still young and have beautiful memories in photos of us in our prime but from what I've seen so far is that all the people I know who have been married around me have just ended up with partners they don't like and now have lovely photos to signify the wasted time. đ€·
Wow, thatâs awful. đ I witnessed my parents incredibly in love, through good times and bad, for 35 years until my father passed. My mom was holding my dadâs hand through tears as he passed. I witnessed her there in his weakest moments, and I watched him there for her in hers. I guess marriage only means to people what theyâve witnessed, good or bad. Fortunately I witnessed the good.
â@@claudiag.3036 You are very fortunate .I hate it here
Sheâs right. No rush to get married fast
I'm with the 2nd woman
Every day is a choice to love your spouse - I've chosen 28 1/2 years to love my husband and he has too. God as our center with the changes in life and helping each other be better and having a sense of humor is why we are successful
Signing papers is not necessary
Well, you have legal protections in marriage. If your boyfriend ends up in the ICU, they have every right to forbid your entry since you're not "family".
Just for that reason she should marry? Lol
@@wyleecoyotee4252 No. That was just one example. There are financial benefits too.
@Lady Bohemia
Financial benefits? Not if she's already financially independent.
Would never depend on a man. Not worth the risk.
The main problem in marriage i think is the issue of post divorce settlements
Its in nature of a man that he loves the money and power most
And the threat to loose it by a woman is the thing that is keeping people away from this bonding.
Sad how far folks have departed from God. Jesus is the only way to heaven, and hell is real. Sex without marriage leads to a lot of problems.
marriage is a union of two people to be selfless and do everything for the other person but most people tend to be selfish so that's why it doesnt workout
How sad. I hope she finds real love and realizes there is such a thing as a healthy, happy marriage.
You think love is exclusive to marriage?
@@robertduluth8994 no, but I didn't imply that. Happy, healthy marriages DO exist, however. There's no fear in love, & that includes fear of commitment.
It's 2023, time to move on.
Is there?
@@DanielleLegacy there isn't
This idea of loving someone, living together indefinitely without the institution of marriage is problematic. They say marriage is only a piece of paper đ and isnât worth anything. A degree đ is a piece of paper đ so too a licence đȘȘ or a certificate of any sort, yet these are worth something when it comes to credibility. Iâve seen couples who live together for decades, no marriage, a number of children. One person dies and the other half canât claim certain benefits as they werenât legally bound.
She's been conditioned by her surroundings..
Everyone is.
Married for 18yr and yes marriage is overrated! đ
Shit, thatâs the explanation why western women only get engaged after 10 years of being with a âpartnerâ and get married after the next 10 years đ You should not say that nonsense to a man girl. (Iâm a woman). Marriage is not just for being together, it is your status in society and legal protection.
What are you being legally protected from?
â@@zachmclean2858professional cheaters/deceivers! Plus, all the medical, procedures, insurance, mutual benefits.. do your own fking researches!
Both have good points it depends on the individual and partner
she is confident in herself because she is young and does not need a wedding to tie someone to her ...
That's like saying I don't really believe in salaries too much. If you truly like the job, you will want to do the job just out of passion. People who get paid salaries start to take the job for granted and sometimes even lose sight by switching their job for higher pay.
Why would you want the government involved in your love? Why do they want to be involved in your love in the first place?
Oh please, I honestly think marriage is a beautiful thing. I think she's scared that would happen to her.
đ everything she explains is truth
That's sad. Marriage is a gift.
Moms sounds like she got some regrets
You would do too if your kid said that. Basically called her moms marriage..trash.
Yup
Yeah, i don't think i want to get married for the same reasons, but I do want the proposals, the care, the meaningful nurturing so its really a catch 22 for me. To say the least, I'm not focused on marriage and I never have, but I do want to fall deeply in love, I want a fantastic, symbiotic, nurturing and supportive relationship maybe to the point where someone makes me rethink my stance on marriage. I guess I'm not open to marriage rn, but Im open to someone helping me change my mind
So as of now or until now, you've been dating just for fun?
why would you base your opinion on how somebody else's marriage turned out, and assume that's how your marriage will be, makes no sense at all, courage and faith, give it a try!đđđ
No ,stop trying to trap people
In our culture, itâs not aloud to just live with your partner
Only if you get married then you can live together.
where are u from?
Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution
Lol!
Am never gonna listen to any stranger. Marriage is a union between two people and two families it's never gonna be overrated
Donât get married before 30 unless itâs required by your faith.
Even if it is required by your faith, don't get married until you are 30
She has issues. Itâs not about the marriage. Hopefully sheâll grow out of them.
The marriage contract with the "state" is unknown to most until the contract is being broken.
Marriage comes with over a thousand legal benefits and protections. I've seen people who don't believe in marriage get royally screwed over when they needed such protections but didn't have them.
Wise mother đ
Two things:
1) Aristotle: "Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom."
2) Do not even think about marriage if you have commitment (and or mental/emotional) issues.
Idk, both opinions valid.
50% of marriages end in divorce BUT only 5% of ALL relationships last. So, yeah, her relationships are probably not gonna last. Only 5% chance if she doesnât get married.
I completely agree with the daughter.
I used to think like that and now I am married and have children. Be open to learn and grow.