What Is a Toxic Behavior That Is Disguised as Virtue? - Reddit Podcast

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  • čas pƙidĂĄn 8. 07. 2024
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Komentáƙe • 59

  • @amithegenius
    @amithegenius  Pƙed 20 dny +4

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  • @No__direction__
    @No__direction__ Pƙed 14 dny +60

    The “they’re your family so you have to forgive them” argument. No, no I don’t. If you treat me like sh!t I’m going to leave no matter who you are. Parents don’t get a special VIP pass

    • @tentaclesmod
      @tentaclesmod Pƙed 13 dny +3

      I kinda get the idea. You accept shit from them that you wouldn't from others so they do from you. Even when unequal it's about being each other's safety net, the one thing available in the end. But if they are only interested in taking and aren't there when you are the one that is in need or fucked up, there's no reason to bother.

    • @littlesongbird1
      @littlesongbird1 Pƙed 8 dny

      Thank you. My mom pulled that one on me. Funny thing is, she encouraged my sister to hold a grudge against me.

  • @EclipsePheniox
    @EclipsePheniox Pƙed 14 dny +10

    That thing about venting is important. I'm on the autistic spectrum and had a bit of a burnout a week or two ago (Basically it's a chronic exhaustion, loss of skills, and reduced tolerance to stimulus. Think of a dam with emotions, tension, stress and other bad feelings as the water, and said dam bursting and you get the idea) and I vented on Facebook. Less for attention, somewhat for help and more to get it off of my chest saying fuck you world. It made me feel better and I relaxed. Sometimes you need to vent and just and someone nod in agreement.

  • @3frenchhens818
    @3frenchhens818 Pƙed 14 dny +28

    About always saying what you think: Peg Bracken put it very well: "Did you ever notice how people who tell you they always say what they think seldom think anything nice?" (Quoting from memory.)

  • @animalbones25
    @animalbones25 Pƙed 14 dny +11

    When people say "sorry not sorry". So, you're sorry for not being sorry? Lol

  • @leshyaedawnfire
    @leshyaedawnfire Pƙed 14 dny +33

    "Brutal honesty". Honesty itself can be a virtue, but brutal honesty is just fancy way of saying "I'm an unrepentant asshole and don't care about anyone's feelings."

    • @sockosophie3132
      @sockosophie3132 Pƙed 14 dny +2

      Do you want actual help or someone saying you've done everything right.

    • @Genni4862
      @Genni4862 Pƙed 14 dny

      ​@@sockosophie3132 oh come off it. You can be honest and achieve the same goal without being an asshole. Grow up

    • @autumnazure8928
      @autumnazure8928 Pƙed 10 dny

      Had a friend like that

    • @GrahamLavelle-hn3sz
      @GrahamLavelle-hn3sz Pƙed 9 dny +1

      Brutal honesty is great coming from the right person

  • @samsimington5563
    @samsimington5563 Pƙed 6 dny +5

    I'm the same way with the respect your elders thing; I'm not gonna give respect to somebody unless they show that they're doing the same in return. No amount of "because I'm older/know more" or "because I said so" or anything similar is gonna be enough for me to vex any chance of disrespect

  • @NexusOfChaos
    @NexusOfChaos Pƙed 14 dny +8

    my thing with #43 (20:28) is there can actually be positive value to that kind of lie.
    basically, you want to ask if what you're saying is kind, honest, and necessary. preferably you would want all 3 but just 2 would suffice. having only 1 should never happen intentionally, and having none should never happen even by accident

  • @CharlesGriswold
    @CharlesGriswold Pƙed 14 dny +9

    Exposure doesn't pay the bills, but it can get you a hot meal and a cot to sleep on in the local jail. Just saying.

  • @Rui_and_Kinger_Ultra_Fan
    @Rui_and_Kinger_Ultra_Fan Pƙed 14 dny +6

    As a One Piece fan love that Nami is in the thumbnail, actually the prompt is really fitting for her.

  • @princessmarlena1359
    @princessmarlena1359 Pƙed 12 dny +2

    Parents who push their kids beyond their limits and justify it with “love” and “wanting the best for their kids”, “wanting their kids to live up to their potential”. Just be honest and admit you want to relive your life through your kids and want to have bragging rights.

  • @Genni4862
    @Genni4862 Pƙed 14 dny +6

    Lmfao the strong personality people and the 'im just brash/bold/a bitch, if you dont like it you dont deserve me'. Drives me NUTS. As someone with a 'strong peesonality'- its not a good thing- its caused by a literal personality disorder and it makes life hell. And im responsible for keeping it in check- thats why it pisses me off so much to hear people say that shit when usually theyre big mouthed women who cower the minute you call them out. They say these things because they tgink it makes them tough, but the reality is being a NICE person is what takes real strength.

    • @tentaclesmod
      @tentaclesmod Pƙed 12 dny

      @@Genni4862 Fully agreed. I have the same kind of problem, I'm not proud of who I am, but I definitely can vow that getting angry and yelling is just a matter of impulse, controlling that impulse and remaining calm is what requires real effort and strength.

  • @esteemedmortal5917
    @esteemedmortal5917 Pƙed 14 dny +8

    I second being overly kind. Some people don’t deserve it and continuing to do things for them or be their friend is just roping you into unnecessary drama.
    You don’t and shouldn’t be mean, but you’re not a bad person for ending a relationship (romantic, friendship, partnership, etc).
    Lastly, some people’s trauma isn’t compatible with your own ie their shit makes your shit worse and vice versa. Just better to part ways and wish each other well.

  • @happyhippoeaters4261
    @happyhippoeaters4261 Pƙed 5 dny +2

    Family may not come first, but it is important.
    An important question to ask first though is, who is your family?

  • @nyotamwuaji6484
    @nyotamwuaji6484 Pƙed 9 dny +2

    Pay it forward lines and people getting pissed if you break one.
    At that point its no longer a good deed, its a obligation and hey, maybe I dont have the money budgeted to pay for someone elses food. I budgeted for ME. Not other people

  • @kurotsuki7427
    @kurotsuki7427 Pƙed 14 dny +2

    I dont have a good filter when not medocated, this mostly just means im a rambling mess who confuses everyone trying to listen to me. I try to not be unmedicated because of this and other reasons.

  • @happyhippoeaters4261
    @happyhippoeaters4261 Pƙed 5 dny +1

    I do have a strong personality, I try so hard to surpress it because, well, strong doesn't equal good, sure, some people might find it charming, but it can quickly get overwhelming. It's best if we just keep that beast on a chain.

  • @Demonetization_Symbol
    @Demonetization_Symbol Pƙed 14 dny +6

    I feel bad for people with strong personalities.

    • @lrajic8281
      @lrajic8281 Pƙed 14 dny +2

      Your word “strong” is moused. Perhaps you mean “very determined” or “very defined”.

  • @FlamingoSandwich
    @FlamingoSandwich Pƙed 2 dny +1

    The "if you can't handle me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best" people just an excuse to act like arseholes and not take responsibility for it l.

  • @happyhippoeaters4261
    @happyhippoeaters4261 Pƙed 5 dny +1

    I do my best to be Brutally Honest, and I won't apologize, because I am choosing to be awful, I am the Villain!
    Mwhahaha.
    Okay, that was tacky, even for me.

  • @bethdibartolomeo2042
    @bethdibartolomeo2042 Pƙed 14 dny +1

    I've been guilty of looking for recognition of good deeds, but only on the close acquaintance level. I think it comes from a lifetime of mom (a wonderful person in so many ways otherwise) not giving enough compliments or congratulations growing up, that she'd be quicker to nitpick than to praise, and it taking me years to realize that. She's getting better now that I've pointed it out. I try to keep in mind the Biblical teaching about not trumpeting your good deeds to get attention to stop myself.

    • @360entertainment2
      @360entertainment2 Pƙed 14 dny +1

      I grew up in a household like that too, I’d come home after some accomplishment at school and my parents would nit pick everything into oblivion. I stopped telling them about home games for whatever sport I was playing because even though I was getting congratulated for small improvements I’d made they’d just nit pick everything!

  • @slipstick985
    @slipstick985 Pƙed 10 dny

    9:30 You can call me what you like. Just don't call me late for dinner.

  • @TeamMcGrath
    @TeamMcGrath Pƙed dnem

    The reader voice is changing so much I can't tell if this person has accent confusion or there are multiple readers (either that or its a broken AI), regardless cool videos :)

  • @Akku8581
    @Akku8581 Pƙed 12 dny

    I use to be nice to people back on the day, this was before a time where people posted everything online.

  • @kriscynical
    @kriscynical Pƙed 14 dny +2

    Purity Culture.

  • @ChillyUltraKill
    @ChillyUltraKill Pƙed 14 dny +2

    I tend to want to help everyone and kind of give up on myself because I genuinely think that if they are happy, i an happy. I do good deeds to truly help others but i do talk about it sometimes. I also lack motivation and i want to be like a supportive side character to my best friend albeit i have my own personality. If you have some time and would be willing to maybe give me some advice regarding wha ti did say like advice on how to not think about being a people pleaser. Please do but i am not forcing you to and it isn’t for attention. I genuinely want to become a better person for everyone around me

  • @crystalweible152
    @crystalweible152 Pƙed 14 dny +2

    Jeebuss this is hard to listen to. I don't have many people but the ones I DO have are excellent! More like family than friends.

  • @rynial15
    @rynial15 Pƙed 12 dny

    Story #45 is kind of true in certain situations, like if there’s a crime going on, but if it’s something that is harmless but is something that you don’t like, I don’t see the point in speaking up about it

  • @tentaclesmod
    @tentaclesmod Pƙed 13 dny +2

    Considering how much of toxic asian culture goes back to confusianism, I have come to believe that confusius was full of shit. I say this in regards to the asian parenting and the extreme focus on academics because that also tracks back to confusius.

    • @princessmarlena1359
      @princessmarlena1359 Pƙed 12 dny +1

      “Confucius say: ‘He who farts in church, sits in own PEW’!”

    • @mondoseguendo6113
      @mondoseguendo6113 Pƙed 7 dny

      @@princessmarlena1359can’t beat that logic.

  • @blessedandbiwithahintofmagic

    Also gossip is bad - we don't need revisionist history hour. There is a difference between gossip and the example given of telling if someone is a bad coworker (although, this in itself can poison the well, and make you misjudge a person).

  • @IsYitzach
    @IsYitzach Pƙed 11 dny

    While Lexiconwaffle may have a hard time placing the accents in story 17, I think your Arnold and Trump accents were on point.

  • @ThePeopleEatersAndSongEnjoyers

    Story 41 - haha oops that's me. I laugh at everything, it's just become a habit to mask how little I feel anything. Emotional trauma from an ex? Haha oopies. Chronic pain during childhood? Lolz that's so silly. Consistent mental health problems? Hehehe. Open heart surgery? Lmao the scar will look so cool. Almost passing out every time I stand up? Haha dang I'm so clumsy. Almost becoming homeless? Lollllll. Vision problems? Hahaha. Getting nauseous just thinking about food? Haha well its not that bad. S*icidal thoughts? Well I'm not gonna do anything so it's fine. Parents argue constantly and get mood swings? Hehe lol it's fine I'll just shut the door and stay in my room. Mom is so paranoid about an ex of hers that she won't let anyone show their face online and we've been moving around the country my entire life? Lmao it's for the lore. Unable to do schoolwork because I'm so burnt out just from existing ? Lol I'm just lazy. Not being able to imagine myself as an adult because I've told myself I'd off myself before I hit 20? Haha it's not that bad other people have it worse lol.

  • @user-eh8qq1kk8z
    @user-eh8qq1kk8z Pƙed 4 dny

    Pdst from college exams? Talk about a giant 🐈

  • @blessedandbiwithahintofmagic

    These were a breath of fresh air, until they got to the part about wanting negativity mixed in with their positivity. Being optimistic about things like fitness and not down on yourself, keeping negativity out when you're making goals is not toxic positivity, it's the right thing to do.

  • @pocketbread7535
    @pocketbread7535 Pƙed 14 dny

    First one.
    As long as someone helps/do charity/donates/whatever, idc about the reason.

  • @ML20-gt2vh
    @ML20-gt2vh Pƙed 12 dny

    15:53

  • @christianjadot4459
    @christianjadot4459 Pƙed 5 dny

    A lot of haters in that Reddit thread.

  • @bensoncheung2801
    @bensoncheung2801 Pƙed 14 dny +1

    👋👋👋

  • @lexiconwaffle
    @lexiconwaffle Pƙed 14 dny +1

    What accent are you even going for? 😅

    • @GrahamLavelle-hn3sz
      @GrahamLavelle-hn3sz Pƙed 7 dny

      Idk what Arnold svwartsenegger sounds like, but the Trump voice was on point

  • @Evie_SG
    @Evie_SG Pƙed 14 dny +4

    1 view in 16 seconds bro fell off