This "Cars" Knockoff Is Horrifying
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- čas přidán 3. 06. 2024
- Bikes, a knockoff of "cars" is horrifying and bad. Let's watch it!
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About Ted Nivison / JehBerDeh:
Ted Nivison is a CZcams entertainer/Filmmaker/voice actor/comedian based in New York. He creates comedy videos on CZcams making commentary videos about various funny topics and poking fun at ridiculous people on Facebook, CZcams, and Instagram. He's got some sweet moves as well. - Komedie
"Being fast isn't a personality"
Tell that to Sonic
Tell that to keemstar
tell that to ur mom
being slow is??
You can’t... because you’re too slow...
Rosebud ggg
Ted looks like he’s wearing a stereotypical movie disguise
But what is he disguised as?
God
Albin Helen it’s iddubbz
Albin Helen uncls
He looks like he's gonna change his appearance drastically like idubbbz
"Crack me open a LaCroix"
Didnt know this was Danny Gonzalez's 2nd channel where he likes to get a little sillier
🙁 a little sillier , a little wackyer, and LaCroix🙁
Went searching for this comment
Another thing: There’s a bike painted in the American flag meaning America exists, and the rusty secret police bike has the German iron cross next to it’s pedals.
yo what the fuck
world war 2-wheels
Man veterans of the bike wars got treated like shit.
Lore
@Win_tosh Adolf Brakeler
I like how Ted totally glossed over the fact that the main character called his city Spooksville, even tho its spelled Spokesville and they didn't have the voice actor retake the line.
Lmao
There was also a point where the voice actor for speedy spoke through Montana, but I had to cut some stuff out
Ted Nivison truly a cinematic masterpiece
I was thinking about this.
It's because it's Canadian?
Oh, Ted doesn’t only sound like a dad now, he looks like one. That’s neat
he's pretty schmuddly
A replacement has been acquired
DILF
L
KosmicKalamity ayyyyy 2,400th like
"this whole thing is like an acid trip, implying i've never had one" this just make the accidental nerds edible so much more funny
Teds content is like that one miscellaneous drawer everyone has in their kitchen. You never know what you’re gonna find in there but you’re never disappointed.
Broken scissors, dead batterys, screwdriver x 2, metal things, doorknob, papers, wired and cords, and a mechanical part of questionable use
Batteries, a screwdriver, a weird old like 1950s looking small radio, a bag of toothpicks and matches also it smells really bad
And random metal shit
I dont know how but every time I check in there there is just more double a batteries, I'm not buying them and I live alone so who the fuck is putting them there?
@@Joseph_Stuntn i feel like everyone in the world has one cursed drawer because i checked today and the radio i mentioned was gone
There’s actually another bike with arms except he wears boxing gloves and his name is Bike Tyson
Its been over a month and this is still so underrated.
Still waiting for the likes to start rolling in
isn’t that the same thing as a person being named human
*B I K E W A Z O W S K I*
I hate that I can’t tell if this is real or not
The lip synch in this movie is actually disgusting.
I was about to say the same thing. Sonic adventure 2 looks better with that shit
the voice acting in general is just terrible lmao
its because its originally in another language you goofball
Seemed fine with everyone but rock
Why
Aren't
My
Lips
Moving
This belongs in the body horror genre.
Cronenberg would be proud
13:07 as a biker myslelf, speedy could have tubeless tires with sealant meaning that when a hole gets in the tire, if you pump air into the tire the sealant inside will seal the hole
I was looking to see if anyone brought this up
Yeah, i am surprised that Cannondale actually licensed the use of the "lefty" design. Speedy literally has a Cannondale logo on him
@@frederiklykkeandersen175 I can't explain why but this makes me uncomfortable knowing that canonically he's a canondale bike
Oh, sort of like in the movie Taxi (2004), where the antagonists have a car with tires that reseal themselves as they drive.
Honestly I’m surprised Ted didn’t mention how rock bikerson is like a someone being called stone humanson but then again this whole thing is a fever dream so I guess there’s just way too many things to mention
Characters in movies and real life have been named Rock, but the Humanson part is funny
@@TedNivison model calender when?
@@dzzenok4136 i can if you want :flustered emoji: :flustered emoji:
Humanson doesnt exist but Manson does
im the man who got u to 999 likes
i’m starting to worry that everyone in goop is gonna end up with a mustache
If Carson ends up with a mustache I’ll just die
Fart club*
If Travis ends up with a mustache, now that’ll be interesting
carson can't grow a mustache lmao
It's a disease, it is unstoppable
I've worked in a movie theater for about 3 years now and this is easily the most bizarre children's movie I've had in exhibition
Speedy: *causes a four-way traffic collision*
Officer on traffic duty: *sees the entire thing go down in front of him* "Good day Speedy!"
No wonder why Speedy's a reckless asshole, the law enforcement happily just lets him get away with everything with no punishment or repercussions while everyone else suffers for it.
Its racially motivated and the police and speedy want to eliminate the town of all gas bicycles.
speedy is an allegory for the elite
Well, he does have a hand after all.
Naming a town Spokesvile is like naming a town “bonetown”
I mean that'd be a pretty baller name tbh
@@JordanHB77 I'd live there tbh
femurville
Clavicle City
Clitoris City
I saw the character in the thumbnail and thought that was just some screenshot where he looks super deformed but no, that’s just how he looks. What a nightmare
Ted or the car lmao
@@burrsoup LMAO
@@burrsoup💀
10:16
"You are not up to date with your payments, dear bike citizen, you cannot fill up on ga....s"
Why did he say it like that
"Being fast isn't a personality, speedy"
*sad octane noises*
"Not during business hours." Shes a call girl. SHES A CALL GIRL.
Or rather...
The town ride...
Holy fuck
"Dad" perhaps DADDY?
I think you mean call bike. Get it right Alexander
The community bicycle.... been used by almost everyone and sucks in every way
Thank u i thought I was the one being dirty 😆😅
You missed out on using “Carssandra” as a pun.
but this video was about Bikes not Cars!
Bikessandra
spokessandra
"crack me open a lacroix", horrifying movie review, oh my god he's Danny gonzalez
also dannys bee video "this bee movie knockoff is terrifying"
You broke the Matrix 0-0
0:46 hold on "crack me a la croix" sounds like something Danny Gonzalez would say, and he also looks like danny! wait is ted Danny Gonzalez
It’s like this guy saw Cars and the logo for Robots and said “I can do that!”
This guy? You mean Ted? This is a joke for all you idiots about to retort with a comment of your own.
ktd 166452 what are you even on about ?
@Lilcapone Engrish.
@@bigpigeon2384 Mink said "this guy," which could mean anyone.
No hate meant, Mink. Again, I was joking.
ktd 166452 so? That’s literally nothing. Anyone with a brain knows who he’s talking about
“The most luscious lips of any bike”
-Ted 2019
Me: Mom can we have Cars?
Mom: We have Cars at home
*Cars at home*
i m s o r r y , g i v e m e a s e c o n d
11:06
If he hadn't have told us which movie he was talking about at the beginning, i could have assumed he was talking about Cats.
I love how most of these comments are about his moustache
He should have known very well that that’s the only thing we were going to talk about
Jason Darling Can’t argue with that
Tbh, I didn't notice the stache 'till I read the comment section
So is urs now
I mean look at it
it has been a year, and i am still very upset that the grandpa bike isnt one of those old ass bikes with the really big front wheel. genuinely such a good idea they just,,,, didnt use
a penny-farthing!
The moment you realise that ted almost grew mutton chops and turned into Jshlatt
“Pink, that’s the girl color”
Yes, I agree.
making all the buildings out of bike parts when the characters are bikes is like putting gingerbread men in gingerbread houses
its like naming your grocery store "the arm"
House made out of flesh or flesh made out of house?
Splat's and Sharps pumpkin
It's just one giant incestual society where buildings and the creatures who reside in them procreate in some slurry of DNA and architecture.
Its pretty crusty ngl.
HAHAHAHA
this is like an alternate universe story i’d make playing with my *Disney* Cars as a six year old.
10:21 "therefore you cannot fill up of gaa..s"
“How does it feel being number one?”
*It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a message.*
we ride in a SOCIETY
Is this perhaps an alpharad reference 👀
Will Can Do Stuff forward aerial
me when i say the n word
Getalife ah yes
I was thinking of incest when she said that the mayor wasn’t her dad during working hours idk why
Same
I was more about she had daddy issues, but it's pretty much an open end for interpretations. lol
Get a Jesus
Or she has a daddy kink thing going on with Speedy
Oh no
Im sure this entire movie was sparked from the "two tired" motorcycle joke
What gets me is that the director, knowingly ripping off Cars, decided to specifically choose bicycles as their base vehicle ripoff.
No boats or any, you know, motorized vehicle, not even motorcycles, but straight up bicycles.
I know they just didn't care enough while making this, but that's still absolutely ridiculous. Hell, if they had gone with boats instead of bikes maybe they could have more creative design choices than Speedy's dog literally just being a bike seat.
I ain’t the only one who felt like when she says “not during working hours” to her dad about him being her dad gave them the vibes they were sleeping together, right?
If he's the that means he's the mayor like all the time so HE doesn't have working hours 😬
◖⚆ᨎ⚆◗
I was wondering how Ted didnt notice this
Somebody call the cops
thank God it wasn't just me getting those vibes 😭
Plz do more bad film reviews this was one of the funniest vids I’ve seen in ages
Thank you!
@@TedNivison yeah I'm gonna need to see more than kung fu panda chief
Poggers?
*W h y d o n ‘ t w e g i v e h i m a f a c e ?*
@@Awfulfeature *_L E T S N O T_*
12:26 why tf do they look like olive garden menu characters
i seriously enjoy your film commentary. im in film classes right now, and this shit is just so funny. also the way you can project your voice is insane
ted ghostwrote bikes and this is his way of atoning for his crimes
An adult man arguing about a scuffed animation movie for nearly 15 minutes
And I love it 😂
Thanks Ted for my first like 👊
Welcome to the internet.
@@menicman7044 have a look around
@@jaundiceispog1017 anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
@Thicc Tomato We’ve got mountains of content
Ted: Being fast isn't a personality you fool!
Technoblade : Hold my beer.
Spyqui boôoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
@@pottasiumcynaide4104 are saying "boo" cuz the comment is bad or are you saying "ooooo" becuz there's drama?
4:51 Plot twist the bike parts use to build the buildings are from Speedy's previous victims
I’ve never felt so many emotions about one mustache before.
Brian Davis Gilbert’s?
Reese's?
@@pearlbunni3621 he looks like a dad with that moustache and i can't tell if i love or hate that
@SirPringleMcDingle I already felt that before the mustache
Mostly lust
Ted looks like the disheveled dad who does "I haven't seen you since last year!" jokes on new years eve.
I’m pretty sure he actually did that tho 🤣
I AM DYING I did not think it would Be a Actual hand I thought ted was joking
1:37 oh boy, foreshadowing for what’ll happen to him in February at the MisFits house
" being fast isn't a personality " tell that to yellow angry bird
His name is chuck you uncultured swine
Tell that to the Road Runner from Wile. E Coyote and The Road Runner
And Sonic
Chuck
His name is Chuck
Dad when no job: Dad
Dad when haves job: Mr Mayor
"That's like making a building that looks like a foot."
Well, there was an old woman who lived in a shoe.
All of the spoken lines shown in the movie sound like oblivion npc lines, with the pauses the utter willingness to be rude ect.
This "Ted" knockoff is horrifying
Like, seriously, Ted doesn't even have a mustache
ikr
Ted: Speed isn’t a personality
Also Ted: *Bases his life off of being tall*
@@f0nk3m0n What the fuck are you on about?
@@syrialak101 a joke he made before I think
that moustache was so distracting i had to rewatch three times to catch everything. Rock bikerson looks like schlatt and i can't unsee it.
10:42 I like how we just ignore that one Speedy Friend in Pink with Sunglasses. What's up with that guy?
I can’t take my eyes off of this man’s moustache.
Help.
its hot change my mind
Same
Spotxo ur wrong soo so wrong
he drank some chocolate milk and forgot to wipe his mouth and now it’s just stuck there.
Daniel Sambar I originally thought this was a dollar shave club ad
Montana: how's it feel being number one speedy?
Speedy: hOw'S iT fEeL bEiNg NuMbEr OnE sPeEdY
10:37 “What the fuck”
I'm assuming that was Ted's input
I watched this with my mother a while ago just to make fun of it. We didn’t end up watching the whole thing though as it got boring even though it was funny how bad it was lol-.
The mustache is so distracting lmao I can’t look at anything else
Sees Ted uploads: *Clicks*
Sees his beard: *Clicks off*
but then it became a mustache
sees his mustache: *comes back*
More like:
Sees Ted upload: clicks
Sees his beard: Full screen
“Being fast isn’t a personality” tell that to Blurr from Transformers
Just subbed two days ago. One of my new favorite channels. Humor is on point my guy.
Every time Ted comments on something in this video, it sounds like he’s going to say something lewd, but goes the completely innocent direction.
Ted’s trying to cash in on the Schlatt Stache
"Being fast isn't a personality, you fool."
1st-6th graders are typing....
Review ratatoing. It’s ratatouille but low budget and not ratatouille at the same time
Ted goes to school for film so he can make Big Lion:The Movie, the ultimate prayer to big lion
Don’t listen to them Ted. The ‘stache looks good, man
Me: mom can we have cars?
Mom: no we have cars at home.
Cars at home:
Hey Ted, I am a little new to the channel but I just wanna tell you how much you have made my life better. Anyways I just wanna say that you have made a positive impact upon so many people’s lives and how much you mean to us. Keep making your fantastic content!
dude your work is actually underated this shit is funny
How are you, just so funny...
I love how there is no music, or background noise, it’s just awkward squeaking and breathing with bike part noises, it’s like a silent disco
The only thing more cursed than this movie is Ted with a mustache
I think you watching more weird movies would be quite magnificent
Can you please review the angry birds movie rip off titled "crazy birds" because that looks god awful to man I saw it on demand 😂
This sounds funny but I can't find it, can you give me more information about the movie?
@@TedNivison it's a very underground movie it doesnt even have a review on rotten tomatoes but they sell the movid at my local target as well as on demand "I have spectrum" it stars Jacob Whiteshed and Johnathan Carley
And is directed by the lovely James Snider
I thought planes was enough but
...bikes?
Haha love the “hanging out in the locker room of the Internet” line
someone was talking about milk in class the other day and i hear a kid behind me whisper "oh god ted nvidia the milk man is coming for you"
my school is full of normies bro they don't watch milkman :(
ted sounds like he wants to impress montana. he’s mr. steal-yo-bike
I’ve watched this video so many times- I adore ted reviewing movies
13:46 my mom when I say something in a slightly different tone than usual
"Rock Bikerson in *spooksville* "
Did they not have enough time for him to record it again? Or edit it?
So why doesn’t Ted have more subscribers? He deserves so many more than he has
Thanks, Erin
8:27 "he has evil facial hair' it kinda looks like shlatts hair i-
Schlatt did something evil in 1999
omg it’s similar to what schlorp did in ‘99
Ted's mustache makes him look like he'd ask kids to get in the white van with tinted windows.
This is the start of the mustache invasion... started with Schlatt, now Ted, I think Carson’s next
I wanna see travis try to grow a mustache
bro i don’t think carson can grow a mustache
Cooper kinda has one im pretty sure
He's gonna grow one and it's going to look like rat pubes
The secret lore is that it started with MistaGG
Theory: Speedy is a racist who wants to cleanse the town of gas powered machines
"A piece of plastic with dentures" is how I would describe people who got way too much plastic surgery and then got old.
"Like when a bike could swing an axe at another bike- there would be war!"
Ted Nivision, 2019
Ted looks like he's cosplaying as Idubbbz
BRO HE DOES how did I not notice that
Ted: *uploads*
Me: I am speed
Same
Two things confuse me about this movie.
1. Did the grandpa at the beginning piss himself?
And 2. How do they reproduce?? Is it like that one movie called Robots where they just MAKE the kid? But how would that work, considering the majority of the town doesn't have hands, so if they do make the kid. Is there a factory where the ones with hands just fuckin make the kids and mail em?
2:24 I don't know why but him just so casually saying "Oh fuck" so calmly makes me crack up.