Funny story. When I brought my dog home from a shelter at first she had horrible separation anxiety. I did everything by the book to avoid it. Nothing worked. One day I started to properly saying goodbye to her , kissing and petting her and putting a blanket on her. I told her that I will be back soon and she shouldn't worry. To my surprise that was the first day when she was fine with me leaving. :D Its been 3 years. I say hello to her every time I leave and I greet her when I come back. Separation anxiety is not a problem anymore :D
My girlfriend's pomeranian doesn't have an issue when we leave for work but gets really excited when she comes back. Honestly, I don't mind it. It's nice to see your dog all excited to see you when you come home after a long day at work.
I thought me and my mother were a little strange for saying bye to our dog! But we're not the only ones. Similar issue, rescue dog. At first she would cry even if we were behind a door in the house. Slowly built up from that, and now if we dont say bye to her, she'll cry after either of us. Like she doesn't notice we're gone at first the suddenly the realization hits
In theory, if you say goodbye with a sad or comforting energy, you'll teach your dog to be worried when you leave. Be careful on how you say goodbye. Especially if your dog already has seperation anxiety.
But but but , I miss my dogs when I’m gone, I’m happy to see them as soon as I get home, that’s the best part about coming home after being gone all month..
Then the dog probably hasn't been alone for a month... If the dog is alone when you arrive home after a month, slow down a bit, that's actually LOVE. When the dog is somewhat calm, then throw yourself on the floor and howl if you like to🤣🤣🤣 Otherwise, everytime you go down that "I missed you so much too" lane it's a confirmation that you have the same anxiety as the dog has. The only thing that leads to is you telling the dog that YOU also see the separation a horrible thing. The dog doesn't know if you or the dog is in danger, but obviously something is threatening. Not only that the dog behaves like a lunitic when you come home, you can have a dog whining, crying and howling when it is alone. That's not a happy dog. If your dog is really comfortable with being alone, it can be alright, but DEFINITELY not if the dog feel just a little insecure over being left alone. How you do when you leave home is also important. The most important thing is that you act calm and secure, "no worries" attitude. My experience is that the less fuzz the better. The "goodbye" moment, when you walk out and close the door, is the critical point. When I have got a new dog in my home, I prepare everything to leave, then I grab a fistful really yummy treats, chopped to mini pieces, and throw that over the floor in a room from where you can't see the door. The dog is fully aware that you are going to leave, so it's no surprise that you are gone, but there never was a stressful separation.
Threshold manners are so important. I think sometimes the excitement is for the humans- to fulfill a psychological need to be loved and validated. We feel that a dog's excitement confirms our worth as a person. it might be similar to why people give kids so much sugar foods too; it's the need to give and receive love, never mind that it is killing us
So just ignore your dog when you get him and don’t do anything seems just as bad as petting them and saying hi to them after you haven’t seen them everyone is an expert including you right?
I don't talk to my dogs when I get home. But one of my dog's excitement is through the roof anyway. I don't pet her. I ignore her until she calms down but it still takes like 5 minutes. She's getting better, slooowwly. It's been months but she is young and has an alpha personality. However, I am seeing improvement. She tests me all the time. I don't ever give in. Consistency is key.
Consistency and patience. Dogs aren't so different from us, and one thing we share is that we pick up habits in a day and then take years to drop them.
Also much harder when a dog has a alpha complex. The need for being in charge. I have one and very smart. I believe you when you say she tests you. Mine does still at 8
I used to come home and immediately went to let out my dog because after a long day I couldn't stand her crying. Now I spend fifteen minutes not even looking in her direction, I put down my bag, change, maybe make some tea, only then does she get let out. She goes immediately outside and knows I won't pet her until after she's done her business, after that she finally gets her cuddle time. It sucked to train but we are both so much happier for it
My beautiful Bambi used to jump up into my arms just when I went to check the mail…. I wouldn’t have changed that, I loved it, that and her peeping through the window.
I have a 4 month old mastiff mix and three older dogs. I have the puppy in a large bathroom/laundry room when I leave. I give her a special chew when I leave that she can only have when I'm gone. When I get home, I take her right outside without talking to her. She gets super excited to see me but I ignore her until she goes to the bathroom. Once she wees I take her in the house and give her love. By that time her energy is down and she isn't overly excited. It has made leaving a lot easier on both of us. My big dogs get excited to see us when we get home but they've already learned that they'll get pets and love when they are chill.
This is so true. My dog used to freak out when we’d leave. He’d howl and scream the entire time. He’s also jump up and mouth when we’d come home, even peed a couple times cause he got so excited. I learned to ignore him when we left and come home, told my family to do the same. Now he just sleeps. He only acts with excited energy when he has to go outside badly when we come home. Other than that he’s gotten pretty chill. Trust me it works!!!
When we first got our pup Troops he struggled with separation anxiety. He would bark and whine a lot when we left. So we started working on it. We would leave for 2 mins at a time. Even just sitting in our car for 5 mins. It took some time but he's perfect now. He can't wait for us to leave so he gets the whole sofa to himself 😊 And now he's OK when we leave we're able to greet him when we return. The hard work and training is worth it guys!
I used to make that mistake with my border collie mix. He didn't have much separation anxiety, but he would go bonkers when I'd get home from work, jumping up and nipping. I love his excitement, so I have just trained him to wait on his mat until I get my bag put down then I pet him. He now jumps straight in the air when he's excited instead of all over me. I still get the "welcome home" from Finn, but without the scratches and nips.
I 100% agree with this as well. We have a 110lb St Bernard, it is imperative that he not jump on anyone coming in the house. Friends and family all know and follow the " rules" we have made for our dogs ( 26 lb pug mix and our St.) They wait in a quiet sit or down until they have calmed down. Their tails are going crazy but they wait and calmly walk up for petting when called.
Oh my... thankyou for this, my 8yo JRT goes absolutely nuts when my father-in-law visits and now I can see why. He hypes him up so our boy now associates him with fun times and craziness. I will be policing the situation in future and encouraging him to keep it chill. Thankyou!
My daughter has been following you advice, and done your Perfect Puppy course, and she can leave her 14 month dog for 3-4 hrs and then go back, and the dog is quiet. Thanks so much for your advice.
Usually when I come home my dog is waiting either in the middle of the hallway or on her bed. I'll say something along the lines of "hello, puppy/Lori/dog/etc," in a normal voice and give her a quick head pat. I don't say anything or acknowledge her until I've put my things down and taken my shoes off, but she gets belly rubs and head scratches once I've done all of that. I think it works for us. Lori doesn't like being completely ignored, but she knows that we will come back and give her love
Thank you for this now! I did this with my Shih Tzu, Taki. She was my first dog ever and I am sure I made a lot of mistakes but I did this right. Thank you for your great advice, keep it coming! 🌞
Dogs can distinguish who they should and shouldn’t jump on over time, it doesn’t have to be an end all be all. You can perfectly safely greet your dog however you want once you’ve established they understand the difference between a grandma and a teenage kid who’s clearly signaling they want to hug.
I'll give you that. My dog is rarely left alone, since we live with my parents, and I work nearly everyday with odd shifts. I don't mind giving her attention when I come home at the end of shift but I occasionally pop back mid shift for something I've forgotten and in those instances I don't give her more attention than saying "not now". also I've always taught her that if she stays down she gets all the attention she wants, but if she jumps up, she gets none.
Ah! So I'm doing things correctly! Good to know! I have a Tibetan Terrier, which are very social dogs and need to be around others all the time...but when I do have to leave him at home for a few hours, I often just quietly leave, which helps to keep him in a calm mindset. And when I get home, I just walk in and conduct myself like normal and just let him get used to me being back in the house. He's always been a very calm and laidback dog who never jumps on anyone and he never has these bursts of energy. He really is an angel and I couldn't ask for a better or sweeter doggo! 😍🐶
I find it really interesting that some of your lessons here are things I've said over the years. I've been told I'm mean, and someone once said I should never have dogs with 'that attitude" Thank you, for talking about dogs being dogs, not humans, and need to be treated like dogs. I like well trained dogs, raised and trained to the needs of their breed. Nothing is more beautiful than a happy animal, living and working to it's full potential
I have a rottweiler hound mix, when she was younger she chewed anything and everything that she could find. We left her home alone for a few hours one time we locked her in an area about 20'*6', removed anything that we didn't want her to chew and left her with tons of toys but what we didn't remove was the wall and came home to a new doorway.
I am guilty of this- because I’m the dork that truly misses my fur-baby when I’m away. She doesn’t get overly excited but for a few seconds when I get home…then she chills and we go about our business. 😊
I'm not accidentally reinforcing that mentality I am on purpose reinforcing that mentality because I love my dog being overly excited every time he sees me
Wow I just yesterday was thinking that I messed up somehow because my dog is mellow when I come home. I thought he was being upset...yet in reality I have trained him right before and just expected the other reaction....in other words thanks for the help
Idk how many ppl have told me I'm mean because when I walk in the door I don't speak to my dogs until I've sat down removed my shoes & prepared my after work herbal inhalation. Then I'll talk to them give them a pet & acknowledge them but until I've relaxed they get no attention & this is exactly why I live my dogs but I don't want them having separation anxiety & I don't want them getting excited every time someone walks through the door
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that they get excited to see me. It’s not bad behavior to be excited. I suppose if they uncontrollably jumped up on me I would correct that but the excitement to see me is not a bad behavior.
@@-teamsukiandcorny- well I guess I have that to be thankful for. I’ve not necessarily trained them I’m just so much into my habits they have learned how to behave. I’m blessed to have very well behaved giants lol it could go the opposite direction with their size I suppose!!
True story. They also need to stop getting their dogs all worked up before they leave. Too many dog owners are explaining to their dogs where they’re going and how much they’ll miss them right before they leave. Your dog has no idea what you’re saying. Just crate your dog and leave. Calmness when you leave and come home will greatly reduce your dog’s anxiety.
Yep :). I stopped saying hello to my dogs instantly when I come in the door, I normally go to the bathroom and stuff and then say hello to them about five minutes after I get home.
I come home and say, "Hey, babies!" As they greet me at the door. Then they jump on the couch, I put my bags down, and give them both love while talking to them in a calm voice. They get scrambled eggs with their dry food when I leave for work so they don't even bother me as I'm out the door.
For sure , we hired a dog Behaviourist and tried everything she taught us , none of it worked , especially ignoring them when you come home , it made my dog even worse and more anxious , he still doesn't like to be left alone but as long as someone is at home with him he is OK now , whereas before even if there was someone , he would still be anxious that I was gone , when I come home I just say hi to him and he settles very quickly . So yes , every dog is different , much like people , thank you for pointing this out
My husky could care less about seeing me when I get home. My job is to open the back door so she can go see the kids next door. I open the front door and she starts saying “owwwwwt” nice to see you too. Glad I can be of service.
we dont have a problem with separation anxiety with my dogs because they hangout together all day but we did have a problem with jumping when we got home, and it wasn’t until we started backing up when they would jump and telling them to sit did they stop and now they sit at our feet when we get home so excited. they know they’re only allowed to jump when we give them a signal. i love my pups so much
My dog will rear in place and spin a couple times when i first get home, and do her little excited tap dance, but she settles as soon as I put my hand on her collar to take her outside to put on her chain for potty time. The only time she gets super anxious when I'm leaving is when its raining or thundering outside, but she just hunkers down in her bed and sleeps through it.
When i get home and open the door both of mine know 1. Get back away from the door, give me my space, you mob me and you will immediately be put into a down stay AWAY from the door. 2 . Sit or lay patiently until i walk past, then calmly follow me to the back door, when we get outside i will release you to run and act goofy. If they get a little to rambunctious walking to the back door we go right back to the front room and start all over...sit or lay down quietly until the leader(me) says we are going to the back yard. A simple " ok boys outside" is the que that they can follow me.
When I come home I see my dog stretching (as he just woke up from the nap) or still dozing off on the couch 🛋️ 😊 then we say hello 👋🏻 and he’s so loving ❤ no anxiety 🎉
I’ve got some work to do on this.Three dogs bark loud and long from the time I pull in the drive way until I open the front door, jumping, barking, loud. Sounds like I’ve got my own kennel. Also could use some advice on urine marking in the home. I have 3 neutered male dogs, and one of them is marking in the home…everywhere. No medical Problems. I have LGD and two schnauzer/terrier mixes. The LGD and our smallest dog seem to not quite have settled who is top dog.
Most of the rules are very logical. However, we treat dog like part of the family. In Britain for sure. That’s also part of the problem. It’s hard to hold your emotions when u love them so much. That’s also a reason why we should change our behaviour. In the end of the day you’ll have a happier dog. As far as I understood, they need a leader to be happy.
My Labrador is always excited to see me but when I enter the house I wait to greet her until I finish changing into my PJs, I hate being in regular clothes lol less comfy, and by then she's has calmed down some and then I acknowledge her.
Having watched quite a few of your videos, my dog should be an absolute nightmare. My house should be destroyed, and she and most likely all our family should be dead. However, we have an amazing dog that is a pleasure to be with and not one bit of a problem to leave.
My Chow cross isn't real demonstrative, but when I leave she yelps a few times to let me know she thinks I forgot her. Then she quiets. When I get back she is quiet and I just walk in and say, "good dog" (kind of like "good day" and do what I need to do when I come in, put things away and so on. After that I'll give her a bit of attention.
Meanwhile, I’ve done all of the right things from the day I brought my pekapoo puppy home five years ago, and he had severe destructive separation anxiety.
We barely talk to my dog when we first get home, mostly to get him to move aside from the hallway because he hears the garage door open and knows that we're home, he used to be good about steering clearing the hallway and waiting off to the side but in his old age he forgets how long he is
Sooo something I did with my current dogs. Since one in particular had really bad separation anxiety, was crate train her like a working dog. Unfortunately. So. She knows in the morning, after getting up and going outside, she's going to get fed in her crate and then she is fine with hanging out in there until I get home. Now, some 6 years later. Unless I'm sitting on the floor or going to bed, she'll hang out in her crate most of the time. Sometimes she'll go lay down on the dog bed with the other dog or come over to get some pets if I'm working at my desk or sitting on the couch but she's definitely got far less anxiety problems than before.
I have a Pyr/dane mix pup named Argus and I'm trying to teach the jumping thing to my friend and hes just like "oh its fine its fine". Ive tried explaining to him that even tho he's just an 80lb puppy right now, hes gonna be 130+ and its gonna suck when Argus hits like 18 months and just plows into my friend cause Argus just looooves his uncle soooo much. Guess he'll learn the hard way when Argus knocks him over to slobber all over his face 😂
I just say hello in a neutral voice and he comes to me if he's not asleep to get some cuddles and then we go our separate way again. That is, if I see the dog often. It's my parents dog, not mine so sometimes I don't see him for a month. Man whatever we both can't hold our excitement and jump around eachother! I love that furrball
well I call bullsh>t my dog greets me the same way even when my husband stayed home with him. he greets me almost as excited as when he comes home from a walk. he smiles and asks for a kiss. yes I am still talking about the dog.
This same behavior works great for children also. Simple goodbyes with quick, uneventful exits and simple hellos with uneventful re-entrances help them accept matter of fact behavior about "Sometimes people leave, and then they come back."
I have my old man sit and wait for my shoes to come off before I do anything other than saying "hi bud". He still gets super excited to see me but it's all tail wagging and tappy paws with no jumping up
Ok. What can you do when you get home, more specifically I want to know what can I do to not reinforce that burst of energy and separation anxiety but what can I do to show my dog that I’m not upset and punishing him. Edit: I accidentally put punching in place of punishing right at the end.
Hy Will Can you talk more about SA; it's prevention and metods to help dogs with serious one. I adopted dog one month ago from horyffying condition. My familly is 3rd in 1,5 year. I don't know what went wrong with 1st one. But, 2nd was lady who had big pack of dogs which were kept inside without enough food and water. My new dog was 'skin and bones'; with chronis gastritis, anemia, diarrhoea, D vitamin deficiency e.t.c. She was starving, beaten and abused physically and psychologically... She was in foster home about 1,5 month and she is with us about 35 days. She gets better and better from day to day, but SA is huge problem. I am trying with crate training (food, toys, treats, blankets.....) She is combination of 'escape artist' and Terminator when left alone. And she is crying like somebody is terryng her appart from a momment we left to the momment we arrive. I have 2 other dogs, but this don't give her comfort. Except professional help, is there anything else what we can do by our selves??? P.S. we are 5 members family + 3 dogs. Everybody is eather working or at school big part of day.
She may just be confused if everyone's doing random things lots of movements around her while she's engaged and trying to interact or suddenly walking off after interacting with her for a little bit. Shes Thinking she's causing the random disengagement but never knowing what it is that shes doing. I've had a boss that would get upset for personal reasons at home and take it out on the workers. Not like lashing out but just the body language and energy being projected outwards. He would, unknowingly, make it feel we were the cause of the negative energy we were receiving. But he would avoid healthy communication so we would never be told what we need to do different to not get these unwanted responses. Sorry this probably didn't make sense it's the first time I've tried to articulate the thoughts. But my point being verbal communication is impossible with the dog so every other sense is used for communicating. When the boss would come around you would feel an anxious energy build up in the body because you can't verbally work it out but think that all the actions you can possibly take are not the right one.
That's funny for me because when I go somewhere for a week and come home my dogs are already going nuts when I open the door. I gotta calm them down so the first thing I do is actually walk past them & go put my luggage down then I'm trying to get them to chill out
I think the dog also reinforces its own bad behavior by thinking "If I keep barking, they will come home," because so far, to them, it has always been true.
Now I understand why my wife shows neither pleasure nor excitement when I come home from work...
She's really helping me !
Okay boomer
🤣🤣
My husband doesn't understand this!! I'm training him too!
😂😂😂
Hahaha
Funny story. When I brought my dog home from a shelter at first she had horrible separation anxiety. I did everything by the book to avoid it. Nothing worked. One day I started to properly saying goodbye to her , kissing and petting her and putting a blanket on her. I told her that I will be back soon and she shouldn't worry. To my surprise that was the first day when she was fine with me leaving. :D Its been 3 years. I say hello to her every time I leave and I greet her when I come back. Separation anxiety is not a problem anymore :D
My girlfriend's pomeranian doesn't have an issue when we leave for work but gets really excited when she comes back. Honestly, I don't mind it. It's nice to see your dog all excited to see you when you come home after a long day at work.
@@pandamilkshake what I said. It's great
I thought me and my mother were a little strange for saying bye to our dog! But we're not the only ones. Similar issue, rescue dog. At first she would cry even if we were behind a door in the house. Slowly built up from that, and now if we dont say bye to her, she'll cry after either of us. Like she doesn't notice we're gone at first the suddenly the realization hits
Routine does a lot for dogs, especially if they've previously had bad experience, it helps them learn you can be trusted to come back
In theory, if you say goodbye with a sad or comforting energy, you'll teach your dog to be worried when you leave. Be careful on how you say goodbye. Especially if your dog already has seperation anxiety.
But but but , I miss my dogs when I’m gone, I’m happy to see them as soon as I get home, that’s the best part about coming home after being gone all month..
Then the dog probably hasn't been alone for a month...
If the dog is alone when you arrive home after a month, slow down a bit, that's actually LOVE. When the dog is somewhat calm, then throw yourself on the floor and howl if you like to🤣🤣🤣
Otherwise, everytime you go down that "I missed you so much too" lane it's a confirmation that you have the same anxiety as the dog has.
The only thing that leads to is you telling the dog that YOU also see the separation a horrible thing. The dog doesn't know if you or the dog is in danger, but obviously something is threatening.
Not only that the dog behaves like a lunitic when you come home, you can have a dog whining, crying and howling when it is alone. That's not a happy dog.
If your dog is really comfortable with being alone, it can be alright, but DEFINITELY not if the dog feel just a little insecure over being left alone.
How you do when you leave home is also important.
The most important thing is that you act calm and secure, "no worries" attitude.
My experience is that the less fuzz the better. The "goodbye" moment, when you walk out and close the door, is the critical point. When I have got a new dog in my home, I prepare everything to leave, then I grab a fistful really yummy treats, chopped to mini pieces, and throw that over the floor in a room from where you can't see the door.
The dog is fully aware that you are going to leave, so it's no surprise that you are gone, but there never was a stressful separation.
Remember it’s for their benefit
@@annabackman3028 I didn’t say my dogs are alone, I’m without my dogs.
Threshold manners are so important. I think sometimes the excitement is for the humans- to fulfill a psychological need to be loved and validated. We feel that a dog's excitement confirms our worth as a person.
it might be similar to why people give kids so much sugar foods too; it's the need to give and receive love, never mind that it is killing us
So just ignore your dog when you get him and don’t do anything seems just as bad as petting them and saying hi to them after you haven’t seen them everyone is an expert including you right?
I don't talk to my dogs when I get home. But one of my dog's excitement is through the roof anyway. I don't pet her. I ignore her until she calms down but it still takes like 5 minutes. She's getting better, slooowwly. It's been months but she is young and has an alpha personality. However, I am seeing improvement. She tests me all the time. I don't ever give in. Consistency is key.
Consistency and patience. Dogs aren't so different from us, and one thing we share is that we pick up habits in a day and then take years to drop them.
Also much harder when a dog has a alpha complex. The need for being in charge. I have one and very smart. I believe you when you say she tests you. Mine does still at 8
Maybe try teach her 'place' when you come in, then release her once she's settled down
I used to come home and immediately went to let out my dog because after a long day I couldn't stand her crying. Now I spend fifteen minutes not even looking in her direction, I put down my bag, change, maybe make some tea, only then does she get let out. She goes immediately outside and knows I won't pet her until after she's done her business, after that she finally gets her cuddle time. It sucked to train but we are both so much happier for it
All sounds good except keeping her waiting to relieve herself. That seems arbitrary and a bit cruel.
@@Ditto463 How many homeless people did you feed today? None? Seems pretty cruel.
@@Zaillothen She's not keeping the homeless people in a cage
My beautiful Bambi used to jump up into my arms just when I went to check the mail…. I wouldn’t have changed that, I loved it, that and her peeping through the window.
You're right, but I want you to be wrong. I am just as excited to see the pups as they are to see me.
When I come home I go "hey man" or "Hey Ezra" even "yo" real casual like and that seems to keep everything in a good state
I have a 4 month old mastiff mix and three older dogs. I have the puppy in a large bathroom/laundry room when I leave. I give her a special chew when I leave that she can only have when I'm gone. When I get home, I take her right outside without talking to her. She gets super excited to see me but I ignore her until she goes to the bathroom. Once she wees I take her in the house and give her love. By that time her energy is down and she isn't overly excited. It has made leaving a lot easier on both of us. My big dogs get excited to see us when we get home but they've already learned that they'll get pets and love when they are chill.
This is so true. My dog used to freak out when we’d leave. He’d howl and scream the entire time. He’s also jump up and mouth when we’d come home, even peed a couple times cause he got so excited. I learned to ignore him when we left and come home, told my family to do the same. Now he just sleeps. He only acts with excited energy when he has to go outside badly when we come home. Other than that he’s gotten pretty chill. Trust me it works!!!
When we first got our pup Troops he struggled with separation anxiety. He would bark and whine a lot when we left. So we started working on it. We would leave for 2 mins at a time. Even just sitting in our car for 5 mins. It took some time but he's perfect now. He can't wait for us to leave so he gets the whole sofa to himself 😊 And now he's OK when we leave we're able to greet him when we return. The hard work and training is worth it guys!
I’m guilty of this! Thank you for teaching me bro!
I used to make that mistake with my border collie mix. He didn't have much separation anxiety, but he would go bonkers when I'd get home from work, jumping up and nipping. I love his excitement, so I have just trained him to wait on his mat until I get my bag put down then I pet him. He now jumps straight in the air when he's excited instead of all over me. I still get the "welcome home" from Finn, but without the scratches and nips.
Excellent job! He is a happy healthy pupper.
I’ve raised and trained lots of large breed dogs and agree with this 100%. 👍🏻
I 100% agree with this as well. We have a 110lb St Bernard, it is imperative that he not jump on anyone coming in the house. Friends and family all know and follow the " rules" we have made for our dogs ( 26 lb pug mix and our St.) They wait in a quiet sit or down until they have calmed down. Their tails are going crazy but they wait and calmly walk up for petting when called.
I recently learned how important our mental state of mind affects our pets. It is so counterintuitive to what I had thought my entire life.
Oh my... thankyou for this, my 8yo JRT goes absolutely nuts when my father-in-law visits and now I can see why. He hypes him up so our boy now associates him with fun times and craziness. I will be policing the situation in future and encouraging him to keep it chill. Thankyou!
My daughter has been following you advice, and done your Perfect Puppy course, and she can leave her 14 month dog for 3-4 hrs and then go back, and the dog is quiet. Thanks so much for your advice.
I watch videos like this and it makes me feel smarter because this is just basic psychology and feels like common sense to me at this point
Usually when I come home my dog is waiting either in the middle of the hallway or on her bed. I'll say something along the lines of "hello, puppy/Lori/dog/etc," in a normal voice and give her a quick head pat. I don't say anything or acknowledge her until I've put my things down and taken my shoes off, but she gets belly rubs and head scratches once I've done all of that. I think it works for us. Lori doesn't like being completely ignored, but she knows that we will come back and give her love
Yes! Ignoring too much cab put rifts in your bond. Just have them be calm before you give them attention
Thank you for this now! I did this with my Shih Tzu, Taki. She was my first dog ever and I am sure I made a lot of mistakes but I did this right. Thank you for your great advice, keep it coming! 🌞
Dogs can distinguish who they should and shouldn’t jump on over time, it doesn’t have to be an end all be all. You can perfectly safely greet your dog however you want once you’ve established they understand the difference between a grandma and a teenage kid who’s clearly signaling they want to hug.
I'll give you that. My dog is rarely left alone, since we live with my parents, and I work nearly everyday with odd shifts. I don't mind giving her attention when I come home at the end of shift but I occasionally pop back mid shift for something I've forgotten and in those instances I don't give her more attention than saying "not now".
also I've always taught her that if she stays down she gets all the attention she wants, but if she jumps up, she gets none.
Me- comes home at night.
Dog- excited
Me - stfu.
Ah! So I'm doing things correctly! Good to know! I have a Tibetan Terrier, which are very social dogs and need to be around others all the time...but when I do have to leave him at home for a few hours, I often just quietly leave, which helps to keep him in a calm mindset. And when I get home, I just walk in and conduct myself like normal and just let him get used to me being back in the house. He's always been a very calm and laidback dog who never jumps on anyone and he never has these bursts of energy. He really is an angel and I couldn't ask for a better or sweeter doggo! 😍🐶
Omg that makes so much sense
I’m the worse at doing this
Thanks for the tip dude.
I find it really interesting that some of your lessons here are things I've said over the years. I've been told I'm mean, and someone once said I should never have dogs with 'that attitude"
Thank you, for talking about dogs being dogs, not humans, and need to be treated like dogs.
I like well trained dogs, raised and trained to the needs of their breed. Nothing is more beautiful than a happy animal, living and working to it's full potential
I have a rottweiler hound mix, when she was younger she chewed anything and everything that she could find. We left her home alone for a few hours one time we locked her in an area about 20'*6', removed anything that we didn't want her to chew and left her with tons of toys but what we didn't remove was the wall and came home to a new doorway.
I am guilty of this- because I’m the dork that truly misses my fur-baby when I’m away. She doesn’t get overly excited but for a few seconds when I get home…then she chills and we go about our business. 😊
Damn bro, spittin facts!
Exactly. The 10 minute rule coming and going 😊
Nobody: 👁️👄👁️
Will: As a canine behaviourist....
I'm not accidentally reinforcing that mentality I am on purpose reinforcing that mentality because I love my dog being overly excited every time he sees me
Until your over excited dog tears up your house to release the energy you caused.....hopefully your just trolling here....
Sometimes it’s very hard not to fuss them but it’s for the best with some dogs
Brilliant advice!!!
Wow I just yesterday was thinking that I messed up somehow because my dog is mellow when I come home. I thought he was being upset...yet in reality I have trained him right before and just expected the other reaction....in other words thanks for the help
Idk how many ppl have told me I'm mean because when I walk in the door I don't speak to my dogs until I've sat down removed my shoes & prepared my after work herbal inhalation. Then I'll talk to them give them a pet & acknowledge them but until I've relaxed they get no attention & this is exactly why I live my dogs but I don't want them having separation anxiety & I don't want them getting excited every time someone walks through the door
I don’t think it’s a bad thing that they get excited to see me. It’s not bad behavior to be excited. I suppose if they uncontrollably jumped up on me I would correct that but the excitement to see me is not a bad behavior.
Yeah, it’s not about the excitement tho, it’s about the high anxiety some dogs feel from being so excited when their owners come home
@@-teamsukiandcorny- well I guess I have that to be thankful for. I’ve not necessarily trained them I’m just so much into my habits they have learned how to behave. I’m blessed to have very well behaved giants lol it could go the opposite direction with their size I suppose!!
@@JustSara376 that’s great! ^^
Great tip.
I'd like to hear more about what to actually do.
Ignore for a few minutes?
Pet him quietly?
True story. They also need to stop getting their dogs all worked up before they leave. Too many dog owners are explaining to their dogs where they’re going and how much they’ll miss them right before they leave. Your dog has no idea what you’re saying. Just crate your dog and leave. Calmness when you leave and come home will greatly reduce your dog’s anxiety.
Wow thank you! I need to send this to my friend asap 😳
Yep :). I stopped saying hello to my dogs instantly when I come in the door, I normally go to the bathroom and stuff and then say hello to them about five minutes after I get home.
I come home and say, "Hey, babies!" As they greet me at the door. Then they jump on the couch, I put my bags down, and give them both love while talking to them in a calm voice. They get scrambled eggs with their dry food when I leave for work so they don't even bother me as I'm out the door.
Every dog I’ve owned had separation anxiety… I’ve realized that IM the one with separation anxiety and my dog is just reciprocating that 😭🤣❤️🐶
this is a good advice but keep in mind that alll dogs are different and it might not work with every dogs
For sure , we hired a dog Behaviourist and tried everything she taught us , none of it worked , especially ignoring them when you come home , it made my dog even worse and more anxious , he still doesn't like to be left alone but as long as someone is at home with him he is OK now , whereas before even if there was someone , he would still be anxious that I was gone , when I come home I just say hi to him and he settles very quickly . So yes , every dog is different , much like people , thank you for pointing this out
My husky could care less about seeing me when I get home. My job is to open the back door so she can go see the kids next door. I open the front door and she starts saying “owwwwwt” nice to see you too. Glad I can be of service.
I taught my dog to wait so I could take my shoes off etc,then I greeted him. He was a lovely dog
I definitely head this before.
we dont have a problem with separation anxiety with my dogs because they hangout together all day but we did have a problem with jumping when we got home, and it wasn’t until we started backing up when they would jump and telling them to sit did they stop and now they sit at our feet when we get home so excited. they know they’re only allowed to jump when we give them a signal. i love my pups so much
My dog will rear in place and spin a couple times when i first get home, and do her little excited tap dance, but she settles as soon as I put my hand on her collar to take her outside to put on her chain for potty time. The only time she gets super anxious when I'm leaving is when its raining or thundering outside, but she just hunkers down in her bed and sleeps through it.
Also overly cuddling your dog makes separation anxiety. Treating them like a kid and etc
This guy seems like a great uncle
How could you not talk to them when they are so happy and I love when my dog jumps on me 😅
Have to fight that urge, it’s for their own good
@@LoneWolf677
And good for your company.
When i get home and open the door both of mine know 1. Get back away from the door, give me my space, you mob me and you will immediately be put into a down stay AWAY from the door. 2 . Sit or lay patiently until i walk past, then calmly follow me to the back door, when we get outside i will release you to run and act goofy. If they get a little to rambunctious walking to the back door we go right back to the front room and start all over...sit or lay down quietly until the leader(me) says we are going to the back yard.
A simple " ok boys outside" is the que that they can follow me.
Best is to ignore them and do your thing, later when they have calmed down you call them and reward them
When I come home I see my dog stretching (as he just woke up from the nap) or still dozing off on the couch 🛋️ 😊 then we say hello 👋🏻 and he’s so loving ❤ no anxiety 🎉
THANK YOU!!!
I’ve got some work to do on this.Three dogs bark loud and long from the time I pull in the drive way until I open the front door, jumping, barking, loud. Sounds like I’ve got my own kennel. Also could use some advice on urine marking in the home. I have 3 neutered male dogs, and one of them is marking in the home…everywhere. No medical
Problems. I have LGD and two schnauzer/terrier mixes. The LGD and our smallest dog seem to not quite have settled who is top dog.
Most of the rules are very logical. However, we treat dog like part of the family. In Britain for sure. That’s also part of the problem. It’s hard to hold your emotions when u love them so much. That’s also a reason why we should change our behaviour. In the end of the day you’ll have a happier dog. As far as I understood, they need a leader to be happy.
My Labrador is always excited to see me but when I enter the house I wait to greet her until I finish changing into my PJs, I hate being in regular clothes lol less comfy, and by then she's has calmed down some and then I acknowledge her.
Interesting perspective! I'll still talk to my dog, asking her if she needs to pee or poop. 💩
You are helping me so muck bc im going to be puppy sitting and puppy and she hasn’t been trained and the owner asked if I can train her a bit
For whatever reason these videos get recommended to me .. I know in first 10 seconds I’m going to hear “ as a canine behaviorist .”
Having watched quite a few of your videos, my dog should be an absolute nightmare. My house should be destroyed, and she and most likely all our family should be dead. However, we have an amazing dog that is a pleasure to be with and not one bit of a problem to leave.
Very good
I’m very guilty of these things and I didn’t know it would cause these effects
My husband has that same Dixon shirt
My Chow cross isn't real demonstrative, but when I leave she yelps a few times to let me know she thinks I forgot her. Then she quiets. When I get back she is quiet and I just walk in and say, "good dog" (kind of like "good day" and do what I need to do when I come in, put things away and so on. After that I'll give her a bit of attention.
My dog peed if I greeted her, so I learned to come home quietly.
No touch, no talk, no eye contact.
*Cesar Milan
I have separation anxiety! Every time I have to separate from my wife's lasagna, I suffer anxiety 🤣🤣🤣
Meanwhile, I’ve done all of the right things from the day I brought my pekapoo puppy home five years ago, and he had severe destructive separation anxiety.
Don't beat yourself up about it , all. Dogs are different 😓😅
We barely talk to my dog when we first get home, mostly to get him to move aside from the hallway because he hears the garage door open and knows that we're home, he used to be good about steering clearing the hallway and waiting off to the side but in his old age he forgets how long he is
Sir. I am going to politely, yet firmly, let you know that I will never stop using a baby voice with my dog when I come home.
Give this guy a tv show BBC or ITV
This was very informative. I do that all the time😏
Sooo something I did with my current dogs. Since one in particular had really bad separation anxiety, was crate train her like a working dog. Unfortunately.
So. She knows in the morning, after getting up and going outside, she's going to get fed in her crate and then she is fine with hanging out in there until I get home.
Now, some 6 years later. Unless I'm sitting on the floor or going to bed, she'll hang out in her crate most of the time. Sometimes she'll go lay down on the dog bed with the other dog or come over to get some pets if I'm working at my desk or sitting on the couch but she's definitely got far less anxiety problems than before.
literally what's the point of having a dog if you're going to treat it like that?
Pointers of what to do instead of talking to them and making them excited
Guilty as charged 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈
The only thing that happens when you talk to cats is they talk back
I have a Pyr/dane mix pup named Argus and I'm trying to teach the jumping thing to my friend and hes just like "oh its fine its fine". Ive tried explaining to him that even tho he's just an 80lb puppy right now, hes gonna be 130+ and its gonna suck when Argus hits like 18 months and just plows into my friend cause Argus just looooves his uncle soooo much. Guess he'll learn the hard way when Argus knocks him over to slobber all over his face 😂
that's right.
I just say hello in a neutral voice and he comes to me if he's not asleep to get some cuddles and then we go our separate way again.
That is, if I see the dog often. It's my parents dog, not mine so sometimes I don't see him for a month. Man whatever we both can't hold our excitement and jump around eachother! I love that furrball
True!
well I call bullsh>t my dog greets me the same way even when my husband stayed home with him. he greets me almost as excited as when he comes home from a walk. he smiles and asks for a kiss. yes I am still talking about the dog.
This same behavior works great for children also. Simple goodbyes with quick, uneventful exits and simple hellos with uneventful re-entrances help them accept matter of fact behavior about "Sometimes people leave, and then they come back."
Nice
I have my old man sit and wait for my shoes to come off before I do anything other than saying "hi bud". He still gets super excited to see me but it's all tail wagging and tappy paws with no jumping up
Me: 👁️👄👁️
My dog: 😊❤️😂😂❤️❤️❤️😂😊❤️❤️
My critters are smart. None of them bother me when I get home till I have a drink and smoke a bowl.
Ok. What can you do when you get home, more specifically I want to know what can I do to not reinforce that burst of energy and separation anxiety but what can I do to show my dog that I’m not upset and punishing him.
Edit: I accidentally put punching in place of punishing right at the end.
Scottie dogs hit different
Hy Will
Can you talk more about SA; it's prevention and metods to help dogs with serious one.
I adopted dog one month ago from horyffying condition. My familly is 3rd in 1,5 year. I don't know what went wrong with 1st one. But, 2nd was lady who had big pack of dogs which were kept inside without enough food and water. My new dog was 'skin and bones'; with chronis gastritis, anemia, diarrhoea, D vitamin deficiency e.t.c.
She was starving, beaten and
abused physically and psychologically...
She was in foster home about 1,5 month and she is with us about 35 days.
She gets better and better from day to day, but SA is huge problem. I am trying with crate training (food, toys, treats, blankets.....)
She is combination of 'escape artist' and Terminator when left alone.
And she is crying like somebody is terryng her appart from a momment we left to the momment we arrive.
I have 2 other dogs, but this don't give her comfort.
Except professional help, is there anything else what we can do by our selves???
P.S. we are 5 members family + 3 dogs.
Everybody is eather working or at school big part of day.
She may just be confused if everyone's doing random things lots of movements around her while she's engaged and trying to interact or suddenly walking off after interacting with her for a little bit. Shes Thinking she's causing the random disengagement but never knowing what it is that shes doing. I've had a boss that would get upset for personal reasons at home and take it out on the workers. Not like lashing out but just the body language and energy being projected outwards. He would, unknowingly, make it feel we were the cause of the negative energy we were receiving. But he would avoid healthy communication so we would never be told what we need to do different to not get these unwanted responses. Sorry this probably didn't make sense it's the first time I've tried to articulate the thoughts. But my point being verbal communication is impossible with the dog so every other sense is used for communicating. When the boss would come around you would feel an anxious energy build up in the body because you can't verbally work it out but think that all the actions you can possibly take are not the right one.
I saw an old movie where a young bride revealed her" secret" to her husband being so attentive.
It was her book
"how to train your puppy"
LoL!
Give the dog a hello, a hardy handshake and its back to business
That's funny for me because when I go somewhere for a week and come home my dogs are already going nuts when I open the door. I gotta calm them down so the first thing I do is actually walk past them & go put my luggage down then I'm trying to get them to chill out
I understand this but I can’t do it
I just Pat my dogs on the head say hello quickly and then have a shower. Yet my dogs still howl for a few minutes when I leave the house.
Ok, makes sense. Now I'll need someone to correct MY separation anxiety so I don't have the urge to make that voice when I see My dog😁
I think the dog also reinforces its own bad behavior by thinking "If I keep barking, they will come home," because so far, to them, it has always been true.