The Crisis of Marrying Outside the Faith| Shaykh Dr. Yasir Qadhi
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- čas přidán 30. 06. 2024
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As practicing muslim lady - i do find it difficult to get married. My country is about 80- 90% non-muslim. My family has been here for 3 to 4 generations - so its not like we can migrate and leave my country easily. When I was younger, I did receive marriage proposals from non-muslim men ( who refused to revert to Islam) and I received marriage proposals from muslim men who refused to pray and practice Islam properly . In end I am still unmarried. And I am not alone - I know of many muslim ladies in my age group who face the same problem - obviously we dont want to marry non-muslim men but the muslim men available are non-practicing ( which makes them have characters and beliefs similar to non-muslim). To make it tough - i have uncles and aunts trying to encourage me to marry non-muslim and mocking me because I made a choice ( for the sake of Allah) not to do so. It's really tough. But I believe this is correct and I still place my hope in Allah that someday I will find a good muslim spouse , Insya Allah.
Sr. Lilly try Muzzmatch. By the way, I'm looking too. May be we can connect?
What's your country
@@kazeemalabi5808 thank you brother for your honourable suggestion. Actually most of my experience I mentioned was when I was in University many years ago. But I am now a much older person compared to you ( based on your pic you look like 21 only ). I prefer an older muslim man around 40++ age group to 50++ age group - nore suitable for me. May Allah grant you a good muslimah spouse more appropriate for you.
@@wheelfan100 im from Singapore
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
Nikkah has been made soo difficult when haram in this society is so easy. Im 26 and hardly know any Muslim sister around me. The few I know barely practice and have no shame doing what non muslim are doing. I have hope Allah will not leave me alone and I know she is out-there waiting for me. I pray Allah bring us close real soon.
Allah help us all young brothers and sisters. Aameen
Stay steadfast my brother in Islam. You will find a nice pious Muslim girl In Sha Allah.
Blame your parents that they decided to immigrate to a non-muslim country and decided to live there.
May almighty Allah help us all on this crucial matter at a time when Sina is so common and cheaper in our society. We need to make halal marriage readily available and much cheaper in our communities and tune down tribal sentiments.
Many thanks Ustaz Yasir on this lecture from Nigeria.
Most “Muslim” girls nowadays are unbelievably liberal thanks to the social media brainwashing them
@Arabian Princess well from a legal (fiqhi) perspective it's allowed technically, but dependa on his preference and a Muslima will very likely make things easier for him and her
Definitely should have Islamic charity events where the young people need to work alongside one another do something productive for the community as well as get to know of each others existence.
Great idea
@My Truth Afghanistan has a problem maintaining the rights of women, especially forced marriage.
Many communities already have such events
You and this preacher are both equally toxic! I am disgusted by your backward views!
1. Prevention is better than cure
2. Change parenting techniques and talk about the facts of life
3. Make nikaah easier (halal is better). If you are making the halal difficult, Haram is available free and widely and common and accessible.
4. Cannot expect son and daughter to not have feelings
5. Harshness is generally counter productive in this society
6. Our kids are to be told. Love is not a bed of roses.
7. Arranged marriages has a big list of pros. Think long term.
8. In Western society a Muslim men is not allowed to marry a Christian or Jewish lady (minority view) . Marry within the faith.
9. Parents, get rid of your jahilliyyah.
10. Need to find a middle balance between gender segregation and community. Complete gender segregation is counter productive.
This is just the beginning. Prophet Google is making young muslims aware that islam has no defence for its faith. To survive islam depends on lies. Any relgion based on a foundation of lies will die.
Shukran
Thank you for writing this. ✍️
Yes! Agree! Agree! We need to find a healthy way within the Islamic rules. I I would rather have my daughter talk to a Muslim boy with my knowledge than any other boy. Thank you thank you so much for bringing this topic up. My daughter goes to an Islamic school. I don’t want her to go outside our culture, religion. Allah protect us and guide us the right way.
Why does culture matter? Why not just focus on religion? Kindly asking :)
I completely agree. This is a very sensitive topic. I'm so pleased that our esteemed Sheikh has brought up this topic. May Allah swt guide all our children on the sirat ul mustaqeem and grant them sincere, pious Sunni Muslim spouses. Aameen Suma Aameen 🤲🏽
Talking to a boy muslim/non-muslim is already outside our religion. Once you start to compromise your Deen then you will have to compromise a lot of things in this current day and age. Hold firmly to religion of Allah. Help comes from Allah.
I feel sorry for her
I hope your daughter rebels and finds true love. God bless her.
Its really important to encourage muslim men to find and marry muslim ladies if possible. As what Shaykh Yasir advised. Many years ago - when I was in university - my muslim girl friends and I - we try to find muslim men to marry. Unfortunately some of the muslim men in uni prefer to find non-muslim girls and develop relationships with them and marry them. Im not saying all the muslim males were like that - but it was and still is a serious trend - and this too makes it challenging for muslimah like me and my friends because we are trying to hold on to Islam and do the correct thing. Nonetheless I try to be patient. I believe this is a Test from Allah and we can find a solution, Insya Allah.
What you should really do is open your mind and realise their are good men and bad men in every faith or outside of any faith. Marry a man for who he is and not what faith he is. Your thinking is like the dark ages, but that is what Islam and to some degree christianity are, dark age beliefs. The world has moved on it is time you did as well.
May Allah bless you with a righteous spouse and help you pass this test so that you are one of those with whom He is pleased
Okay as a Muslim male here is the basic roll of it muslim women are seen as too sexually close minded ie prudish compared to non Muslim culture and also seen as too expensive high maintenance high mahr. Non Muslim don't have a mahr culture in which sense the guy only needs to pay a small amount of money
Appreciate your fatwa regarding Muslim men, I also vaguely remember a incident of Umer (ra) not allowing companions to marry women of the book so they marry Muslim women even though it was allowed.
So much wisdom here… but TBH this type of talk should’ve been given decades ago by our western Muslim scholars and Imams. Better late than never.
My wife is a practising Muslim, and I am a Humanist (atheist). She practices her religion, and we have no conflict. It is about acceptance and not being bigoted. Under Apartheid, South Africa, Nazi Germany, etc. Marriage between races (white and non-white ) was prohibited, and some religio-Aparthaed people thought similar ways.
Assalamu Alaikum Shaykh Yasir Qadhi, I agree on having a full-day seminar on "The Crisis of Marriage in our Muslim communities" in the respective countries we reside in, it's a difficult and sensitive topic to discuss but a must for us to address. Jazalallah starting this conversation which was not easy to take up and I found your lecture was very informative as a parent, I am now in the situation where my children are approaching marriage age and praying to Allah for guidance when finding suitable partners.
I am a Greek Orthodox and without any hesitation, I am saying that you are most right.
Yes, Greek Orthodox nearly as bad as Islam in backward medeival thinking. Religion is evil.
My wife is a practising Muslim, and I am a Humanist (atheist). She practices her religion, and we have no conflict. It is about acceptance and not being bigoted. Under Apartheid, South Africa, Nazi Germany, etc. Marriage between races (white and non-white ) was prohibited, and some religio-Aparthaed people thought similar ways.
This is one of the reason why I like to hear and follow his advices , he is few of the progressive imams who deal wd the modern issues realistically.
This is not just a prob of West, similar is the prob in the east especially indian subcontinent, May Allah save our young generations.
What does it happen in indian subcontinent?
He literally said quran has holes in it from what I've heard.
@@puurrrr he has given a clarification to that statement ,pls hear that as well.
He is a great scholar and I hv benefited immensely .
This is just the beginning. Prophet Google is making young muslims aware that islam has no defence for its faith. To survive islam depends on lies. Any relgion based on a foundation of lies will die.
@My Truth you have 0 ability to use logic and reason. He didn’t say it’s mythical and even then that wouldn’t mean Allah is mythical. Get a life you little troll
Because we send our children into a secular society. 18 years in public school. 4 years in college. Lots of time under secular influence. What do we expect.
Yes, it is terrble what is happening. Good muslim girls going to college and meeting boys who aren't muslim. Falling in love with them an marrying outside of their faith !!! Living happily together and having children. Integrating with infidels !! My the world will fall apart. Maybe she will even realise her religion is false just like all other religions and she becomes an atheist. Well that's what is going to happen and Dr Yahsi can do little to stop it happening.
You feed in Islamic knowledge then. Take responsibility.
Well said. It's much better to get a perspective from a scholar living in our lands as opposed to those living in Saudi Arabia or other Islamic countries. The circumstances for us youth are much different here vs there.
You brought a good point that there shouldn't be ultra consertive segregation. For me personally, it feels really awkward to try and casually talk with a Muslim girl, it's almost intimidating since we're been taught by Sheikhs not to. On the other hand, our society is too open so that forces us to interact with non Muslim women at work and everywhere else, who I unfortunately have found easier to speak and connect with. May Allah make it easy for all of us.
Just talk to her the proper way inshaAllah. The scholars overseas and domestically we've a need for. We are NOT enemies to each other. We're brothers and have to resist anyone who tries to stir otherwise. Muslimas are amazing and make better wives without a doubt.
I have an idea. Muslims who feel strongly about this and live in secular countries should emigrate back to muslim countries where there daughters will have no chance of meeting boys outside the faith. Problem solved.
@@1414141x Facts.
Even the Prophet encouraged to meet the candidate in a halal way. Which Sheikh said NOT to talk to a woman?
Assalamu Alykum WRWB from Nottingham Uk
Great reminder and we are at that point, May Allah SWT grant our children righteous spouses Ameen
This is not just in western countries. Even in India where we have sizeable Muslim population and a good Islam culture, this phenomenon has become common.
YQ Jzakallah khairan for building my faith anytime I listen to you 😇🙏🏽
Im always happy when you post sheikh
Completely on point, thank you Sheikh. Very important to have open and frank conversations with your children and make Nikah easy, instil love of Allah above all in their hearts.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
100000000% all of it, jazakAllah khayr! i pray many benefit from this khatira..
May Allah bless you Sheikh this is such a sensitive but important topic. Masjid in every community should play their role in this it is the best source to find a match within the community
Good God! What an amazing Khutba!
Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatuLLah, sheykh. I'm looking forward to your new library chat). May Allah prevent you from stopping your social media activity you once talked about, may Allah protect you and guide you and forgive you sins and errors.
Really amazing points. I see this issue in Germany and it's so common here for Muslims to simply marry non Muslims. I think what's also important is to have some fun activities that we young people enjoy normally rather than having simple precious generation style gatherings where you simply get together and eat biryani or kebab. It really feels lame and I've never seen young single Muslims attend such gatherings willingly. Maybe having a place where we enjoy the activities and the company of each other would be helpful like and arcade or a place for indoor/outdoor sports and not have broken machines and dirty chairs and tables there. I really think if we participate in the activities that is common in a society but make our own Muslims groups where we compete with one another would bring us together, keep us within the Islamic environment and be in touch with the western society. An example could be a football club or women's basketball or a group of online gamers or cooking competition for both men and women together.
Yes, I do agree with your suggestions. It can bring single Muslim men and women closer together.
I have a daughter on her teens, and I always told her that it's great to have a man from the same faith because there is nothing you will think about except growing closer to Allah.
Yup agreed
--
Ist halt wirklich so
What a powerful and truthful lecture. May Allah reward sheikh Yasir and protect us from this. And the sheikh is right about gender segregation
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
Love Allah more than your own nafs
Jazak Allah khair for this relevant reminder
A MUCH NEEDED TALK! jazakallah khair. Though this was an advice to the parents etc etc. It gave me as an 19yr old a lot of reminders and reality checks. Jazakallah khair for talking bluntly about these issues
I truly agreed that it’s not allowed on this land!
Why are your reason I believe no the muslim population is too small and second too successful too many Muslims with six figure incomes not enough at the bottom or the middle of the socioeconomic ladder women want the very best and the people that are making minimum wage or slightly better wouldn't be able to ever get married
I’m a revert. Latina living in the US and having the hardest time getting married. Most Muslim men don’t seem to respect or value me because im not of their culture. I have no support from family as I’m the only Muslim in my family. I’m a shy introvert and find it hard to make new Muslims friends, specifically when at the masjid they segregate into their own groups and i dont belong. I love Allah and my religion but been considering going back with an ex-boyfriend who is Coptic because i dont want to be alone for the rest of my life. Pray for me.
Just amazing. Much needed MashaALLAH.
Just pathetic. Islam is in the dark ages.
A much needed subject of discussion indeed! 👍🏻🌹💫
A very important topic, I really appreciate your fatwa regarding Muslim men, I also vaguely remember an incident of Umer (ra) not allowing companions to marry women of the book so they marry Muslim women even though it was allowed.
Great and very important video! Baaraka Allahu feekum.
As-salamu alaykum sheikh Yasir Qadhi. This was an excellent topic you covered it well especially the topic of love and the super strict restrictions of gender separation. There needs to be more events in the middle ground of men and women allowing to know each other in the form of knowing each other without the strict separation of genders. There should be more public events where men and women can get to know each other.
Another part of the reason or rather as you stated a way to prevent this is more leaders need to address the barriers of entry when it comes to expensive weddings within certain cultures.
Wedding costs are outrageous. The amount of families of a woman asking for an enormous amounts of mahr or dowry is too much. On top of that the woman's family want expensive and weddings that are not in accordance to deen such as mixed weddings, music, elaborate wedding halls with elaborate wedding costs of the wedding dress, flowers, etc. The entry to marriage is way to expensive and far from the deen. Why isn't this issue discussed more within the community. This is an issue among arabs and desi communities.
Additionally parents of cultures don't allow their children marry outside of their culture. For example a desi parent won't let them marry an arab and an arab parent won't let their daughter marry a desi.
Its so easy to find a woman that doesn't have these entries to marriage however these woman don't have deen. Again this not an excuse to marry outside of the deen.
Dowry is part of the deen and is required but unfortunately trying to marry halal, trying to marry a woman of the deen is very difficult because of parents making the dowry so expensive. insha'Allah please make a video discussing this and have other leaders discuss this. This is a huge issue and it doesn't get enough attention.
Superbly excellent advice.
Jazak Allah Khair for everything you do.
I remember when i was a student in uni, the muslims student organization created an event, i thought i should go! Maybe i would get to know someone so I thought. When i got there, the sister in charge disclosed that this event was for sisters ONLY. They didn't disclose it publicly as its against uni policy. And then we wonder why muslims dont get to know each other? Muslims mingle in uni, workplace, at the shop with the opposite gender but all of the sudden its illegal with muslims only...I see..People marry who they meet and spend time with ! My two cents..
So true
@@hasibabdullah3463 no guardian required when muslims mingling with non mehram in uni, work, shops, etc? I understand you. Bu people remember ruling and teaching when it is about muslims. Why can't be they normal just like with non muslims some times?
Superb💖
Yes, our cavemen ancestors probably thought the same thing.........'She should not marry that man outside of our tribe !!' Islam and Christianity are like that, medeival beliefs. Move on..........Atheism is the truth........
Thank you, sheikh
Jazak Allahu Khairan..
Very informative... Great reminder.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
Asalamoe alykoem, i do agree with what is being said, Allah knows best. May Allah guide us all. Shukr.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
I know a brother who married a non Muslim and the children are not Muslims. It’s sad
the most expected outcome in such cases.
I think it's great. Mankind is evolving and soon medieval beliefs like Islam and Christianity will be things that our future children will look back on and say 'did they really believe that ?'
Agree, the only way is when the love towards Allah is greater
Jazakum Allahu Khairan sheikh very important. And totally agree we young people want to get married young!! In a society where everyone has random relationships and haram is widespread, a Nikkah is the way out and this is the instruction of our prophet. But May Allah allow people to listen and implement. We need 10000 more of you sheikh ❤️
Nikah means sexual relations via intercourse. Random relationships? It's not as common as you think if you mean one night stands and hook ups. Ma malekat aymanakum is the best for modern day Muslims.
@@salmanhossin Nikkah is more than just sexual relationships. It’s a marriage and that’s one crucial part of it off course.
It’s not that common? In our western society, it’s everywhere people sleeping around. And even people have girlfriend-boyfriend relationships or partner relationships and only get married after as they don’t want the commitment. So us Muslims are very different in our relationships Alhamdulilah.
As for Milk Yameen, no comment. Where do you think that exists? Lol hope you’re joking
@@bakrhawari3045 it doesn't mean only marriage. Nikah is supposed to be with a chaste or fortified woman or muhsinat. So an exclusive sexual relationship. The aqd can be verbal. It doesn't have to be written. If the aqd is verbal instead of written it becomes ma malekat aymanakum - what your oaths possessed. In both cases of a wife or mulk Al yameen, she should be a muhsinat. A girlfriend can easily be classified as ma malekat aymanakum or mulk Al yameen in the singular form. The expensive sexual relationship with a fortified woman involves dowry during the aqd which is written whereas it is by tongue or bi Lisan for ma malekat aymanakum. Wife gets inheritance whereas mulk Al yameen doesn't. And waiting period for mulk Al yameen is one menstrual cycle. Muta can also fall under mulk Al yameen. Ma Malekat Aymanakum isn't restricted to former slaves or concubines. Read Quran 4:25 very carefully - word for word. With ma malekat aymanakum, you don't need to provide alimony during break up regardless of who initiates it. The Quran says in 33:52 that the Prophet and believers can exchange ma malekat aymanakum but it's Haram to exchange wives. Why is that? Because wife has three menstrual cycles you got to wait for when you divorce her because you will need to provide full alimony if you initiate it. With mulk Al yameen, she doesn't get inheritance at the time of her man's death. So the Prophet's girlfriend Mariah Al Qiptiya had a child with him but she never inherited from Rasul Allah after his death whereas Hafsa and Ayesha did. A girlfriend is a modern form of a concubine. You backwards people are obsessed with servants and slave girls whereas in the future we will all be having robots and AI cooking and cleaning for us. Mulk Al yameen gets fifty lashes for fahisha and zina whereas married women get 100 lashes and the man gets 100 lashes in both cases.
@@bakrhawari3045 you know a written marriage contract is only for purposes of dowry, alimony, and inheritance/insurance purposes? You know pimps in poor Muslim countries like Albania and Bangladesh will get the approval of a father's hand and then take the daughter and pimp her out even if they write a marriage contract? Does it means their sexual relationship is halal if they do that? People who want to protect their wallets will do the mulk Al yameen thing - after all, without trying to sound "shirky", money is indeed our second God!
@@bakrhawari3045 the Ottomans dated before they married their women sometimes They had mulk Al yameen who they would sometimes marry later on whereas the Arabs, Persians, Indo-Pakistani, Subsaharan Muslims,etc. generally didn't marry from their slave caste/class. However, nothing in the Quran or even Hadiths suggest that it is Haram for mulk Al yameen to be free or rich women. That's your own personal cultural and sectarian bias!
I agree. When I was in university I fell into a similar trap never really got into a serious relationship but it could've been a lot worse thank God we had a pandemic to take me away from all that.
How beautiful and logically explains yq the solution.
Thank you for inspiring me. Please pray for me. Our Heavenly Father can make anything possible. Faith is trusting in God durning hard times. Faith is what is getting me through my hard situation. I’m still struggling to providing for my two autistic children since losing my job over declining the vaccine. I declined due to my pre existing health condition (Lupus) and Heart disease. I was denied my medical/religious exemption from Forsyth Hospital. My husband passed away three years ago, so I’m all alone. Both of my sons are non verbal so things are more hard on me. Every month I don’t know how we are going to make it through. Every month is a struggle, a battle to not end up on the streets. I’m so depressed and embarrassed by my situation. I’ve been put down and mocked over my circumstances. I’m so ashamed and overwhelmed. BUT because of my faith God shows up every month and provides. Even as I face homelessness with two young children. I know that God will provide abundantly.
May Allah help you and ease your circumstances....
Ameen🌼❤
May Allah make things easy on you.
Awesome lecture mashAllah
Pathetic, Islam is in the dark ages.
Good talk mshlh, needs to be addressed so jkhr for this.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
Well said.
I agree with all that you said. I would even suggest we break it down in simple terms and explain it kinda like how long-term relationships work. Non-Muslims are in 5- 10+ yr relationships and that's seen as normal which is a long time especially if you're together from a young age like high school. If we treated marriage as a long term relationship that works with a lot of effort put in and not the pressure it holds in our community many might be interested in marrying/nikkah at a younger age. Sadly we still treat divorce as taboo when it's just another break-up after considerable effort has been put in including therapy and counseling. Halal divorce is better than zina in my opinion. If people were given proper health education, consent classes, premarital counseling and can get tested on the religion at a younger age we could possibly do the nikkah earlier as you suggested.
Younger marriages are more prone to ending up in divorce. Even among non-Muslims, the vast majority of high school relationships and even college relationships do not last long term.
Assalamualaikum! Love hearing your lectures always, and I thus have gained more and more knowledge through their contents Alhamdulillah! I live in So Cal, and abt 5 years ago I heard your lecture abt your fatwa on muslim man marrying non-muslim woman in non-muslim country. At that time, after long hard thought I decided not to marry this Christian lady despite that her family was accepting, supportive, and willing to work with me even with my financial situation. I have known a few who have been married with Christians and because they are oldernow I see them closer to God, Alhamdulillah - and the wives have possibly become reverts too. I cant say the details or even what went against them as I dont really ask them Qs. But as for me, from then on I have become a frequent visitors to this masjid and has been looking for one within the Faith - but to no avail. Obviously what I state here is bias for it only based on 'my experience AND assumptions AND desires.'
I am not of Arab, African, or South Asian - as the majority here in the Masjid - so that is maybe why I am having problem getting married. But again I am not someone who would ask everyone at the masjid if the have a daughter to marry! I ask only from God but wondering on how to go about this without begging someone, or felt that I got married only because a brother hook me up!
And at the masjid despite that we have a large community here, the issue of marriage is rarely or never even brought up, as if - again my assumption here - that everyone with marriage age daughter hides them - unless they see a doctor or something! (and I know thats not true of course) I can understand that maybe at this day and age, race and money are essential components to succeed besides faith, and I dont blame them to want the best for their daughters. Or even if the sisters only go for the best (again my assumptions). But even the Masjid doesn't have an outlet for me to submit my details so the sisters can take a look at their other options.
Obviously now, with the rest of muslim men like me which I dont know how many of us are, or even if we are a force in a building block in this community, how do I go to have this done? And recently I have been flirting again with marrying Christian because -again I assume - that they are more accepting. My ex's dad for example, prized me so much as i didnt do drug, drink, nor smoke and he saw that as being rare! And he even could care less of what I have for his daughter.
Kinda venting out here though I am the one to blame, and I still have good opinion about God. I hope you all well. Amen!
Out of curiosity - where are you from brother?
@@user-et2ng1qb2m I have to keep you curious for reasons. And I go to masjid def. to pray, to worship Allah, not to look for a wife. And the sisters went in from diff door and I never knew how many showed up at daily prayer. I even scared to look at them when they passed by because I didn't know which is not married. But again it's not the idea to go to the masjid to look at woman, right?
And the imam prays that he hopes everyone looking find one - something in that sort. It just that I wish instead of finding them online with all the uncertainty that comes with it, that the masjid facilitates this openly - like maybe a board saying that if you need to get marriage submit your details and we have a book with the imam for some potentials. What do you think?
If you are interested in marrying a muslim woman outside US you can contact me. I am from Dubai. My family and I are open to all nationalities as long the person is a practicing muslim and we are compatible.
@@theseeker7243 Why not bring your idea to the Imam?
@@mujtabaalam5907 You would have to agree that I am not the 1st to come up w this no brainer idea. Any body w a position like me, who doesn't like to beg ppl around for infos, would prefer this. The fact, that the infos is not up could be because ( again my assumption here) that the masjid maybe have tried it before and decided for whatever reason not to continue. Maybe this is missing 'openly' for a good reason. Maybe this is something so serious that the community only allow the imam personally to handle this matter. And 'unfortunately' my personality doesn't even give me the courage to ask, like I would speak up for others issues but not mine personally, you know.
Maybe there is actually low demand with this. God Knows!
About facilitation of Nikah for adult children, I’d like to tell the fathers as a concerned mother, to please make it easy for their sons, if they don’t have the means to buy or rent a place separately to accommodate them in their own homes, till such time they desire or can afford to move somewhere else later. And by doing so perhaps they will consider making this commitment as a young adult within community with a compatible family girl InshaAllah, than choose the path of Haram & blame their parents later for not helping him get married earlier.
And last not least, allow them & make it easier to get to know your close relatives and family friends children, with the thought that they may perhaps choose them for marriage later. 💫
This is a great talk. We have this crisis today because the Mullahs, the Muftis and the Imams are preaching culture and say its Islam. They dont like to see women at the masjid or any Islamic gathering. All these "uncles" need to go.
Women should be free to decided whom they want to marry or be with. If a lady finds a great guy, they should enjoy life together.
Both muslim men and women if they are practicing muslims will be more compatible and happier being married to a practicing muslim. I did have friends who were the product of " mixed" faith ( i.e one parent is muslim and the other is a non-muslim) and such friends were confused about their faith and sometimes depressed. I also had friends who chose to have a civil marriage with a non-muslim spouse. Sooner or latrr due to kids, finance or other problems - the issue of religion does enter the discussion and this can lead to the breakdown of the marriage and family.
@@lilyrosesoul0077 that woman is happily married while you're lonely, she doesn't regards her marriage as a problem, so why are having a problem with her marriage? Focused on your own life instead of others
a great guy of good Iman and Akhlak.. Alhamdulillah
@@hayfalahraoui8361 Lilly is trying to please Allah, while she isn't. Life isn't about pursuing your desires especially at the cost of your morals.
Alot of my Muslim girlfriend married white men. I've been proposed to SEVERAL times be white men. All of them have treated men better than Muslim men. its tempting to marry a non Muslim man but I'm holding out. Please make duaa for me
Why don't you give then dawah or date them anyways and give the ultimatum convert to Islam or we are no longer together much better than waiting for a man that born in the right land to be born muslim
@@wheelfan100 I do give them dawah, I guess I'm afraid of back lash
You marry who you love and feel is the right man for you. Don't marry just because of colour, ethnicity or faith. Marry for your heart and your mind.
@@1414141x to many Muslim (Arab and Persian ) men are jealous of white men and hate when we women marry them. White men are their conquerors
@@sami.1983 No, we are just not as mysogynistic.
And please teach the parents to not be too difficult with newcomers/ reverts to doubt their commitment or declaration of faith when they have already taken Shahada, & hopefully in years to come will grow further as better Muslims , especially in the case when a Muslim marry a Ahlul kitaab/ people of the Book. As in the end it’s Allah swt who judges the intent of one’s hearts & rewards or punishes the concerned accordingly… later. Even when it comes to becoming a Muslim for the sake of Marriage but also seriously believing in the Oneness of Allah swt and Rasul Allah, “ Prophet Muhammad” as the last of messenger in the line of prophets before him (saw) . 💫
Asalam-alaikum from New Zealand 🇳🇿
Very well said by the sheikh.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
💯
Beautiful topic and lecture,
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
@@1414141x that’s actually Christianity, Islam came to bring law and order,justice and rights,freedom and rights to woman , civil and moral code etc. To make sure we don’t go back to cave man days
@@anasibndawood6696 Just like the Taliban are doing then ?? Not going backward ??
A much needed discussion. We are facing this issue even in South Africa. People need to be aware of each others existence.
Allah already ordered it in Kuran. But I couldn’t blame her parents, And only that I know Allah knows best!
Kindly upload a library chat, Sheikh
Excellent.
In extreme conditions pork and alcohol become halal. It is even excusable in extreme conditions if one says that one is not a Muslim but under absolutely no circumstance is marriage outside the faith halal.
Yes it is allowed Islam is against celibacy and celibacy goes against the goals of the shariah. in extreme conditions its allowed for a Muslim man and lady to marry al khithab. Extreme conditions mean little to no muslims.
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
@@wheelfan100 Islam is not against celibacy, it is highly discouraged if there are Muslims available and you are financially able to marry.
Assalam alaikum. Shaik,
Very sensitive topic.. but your speach will eye opener for many Muslims still leaving with taqwa or Iman.
Today's kids don't follow parents but like arhiest attractive temporary thinking about this science and universe.
You are absolutely correct. Environment and precautions will helpfull. 100% true.
Kids can be controlled like dog's tail until we handle it. Later dog put tail beliow only
So please add more knowledge according to Quran. As Adam AS tried and explained sharia law but one of his own son not listening to him. So please add not all children or kids can be controlled but they behave with old gen how grand parents behavior impacted your one of kid. So kids weakness will be according to his base behavior of DNA. From currupted one or with Allah's faith.
But I agree with your speach. That may help to find weakness of our children's. Also plan to overcome that weakness.
Also few parents try lot but their kids not change. Surprised when out of 100 get affection to non Muslim. It's relatively to behavior of DNA. He not control his weakness.
If we not make mistakes in our life. If your gene DNA is base to future kids. They will be thankful to you for protecting DNA character to faithful to Allah.
Many kids in future will blame their weakness to currupted grand parents. Example their medical disorder or weakness.
I understand you speak about we put our efforts and Allah know everything. May Allah help our kids if we try faithful to Allah and kids learned.
I want to request all parents take it seriously 😒 but don't make it sensitive.
Because if one of kid make mistakes. Other kids and parents have impact on society.
Arrangemarriage are allways good 👍. First priority. But due to weakness past history kids go for love marriages.
Now a days arrange marriage are more difficult to make. But love marriages getting easier.
I hope it's like using of credit cards.
Definitely arrange marriage best option. High value. Because Allah accepted it. Halal.
Thanks for reading me. All follow speaker. It will helpful. But don't expect mutch. Because we don't know tommarrow.
Leave it to Allah if you not successful
May Allah protect our ummah
I can tell he is an amazing father. ^.^
Ameeen. I totally agree with you 💯
JzkAllahu khayran
Totally agree with all specially the segregation part. In my country many younger a like to dress up beautifully to go to Muslim wedding this is the place where you’ll find your hubby/wife. Sadly in U.K. Europe country everything strick segregation and mothers really control their sons. And the criteria is so high phd owners Drs white colour skin etc. So am in my later 30 still not married Bcz I don’t see and Muslim man and the British passport worth they won’t even look at you.
Agree agree agree.
What a contemporary topic! May Allah (SWT) save us from the fitna and bless Shykh Dr. Yasir Qadhi for this wonderful presentation! By the way, can anybody confirm the reciter's name?
Qari Ibrahim Bakeer. He has a channel in Arabic and English. U can search CZcams for "maqamat" and he usually comes up. Beautiful brother, very positive. May Allah swt protect him. Assalamualaikum
My body my choice destroys this backwards ass scholars bs opinion
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
@@1414141x Wrong. Same ignorance. Neither are new if you want to take that stance.
100% agree om all counts!
Excellent lecture. May Allah SWT benefits us all aameen suma aameen.
💯💪
Yaa Rabi this situation I’m facing now my kids I feel like if only they knew how I was raised
This is a big problem and will only get worse with the next generation
It's already a huge problem with my generation.
@@misami3537 I agree sister, I am 26 alhamduliAllah and it’s very difficult to find someone who practices or even cares about Islam
@@hm1734 I agree, I'm also 26 😅
In India also many muslim girls married to non muslims Hindus and they also left Islam nearly 8 lakhs girls left Islam only in 6 years in India
Salam alaykum
One important step would be to try and get the man to accept islam, even if it is just formally. Especially if we know the girl is in love, do what we can to try and get him to accept islam. Even if he is not too serious the children will still remain muslim iA
Alayekum salam.
Don't worry too much sister. Muslim women are also allowed to marry non-muslims (jews and Christians)
@@puurrrr who told u that. Plus the guy is a an atheist so even going by ur kufr opinion the marriage is not legal
forcing anybody to accept a religion is entirely wrong. Nobody should be forced.
@@Fahad-gf1wx lmfao calling a muslim "kufr" makes you a worst muslim than me. Stop replying under all my comments. You sound desperate.
@@hasniichasnii7671 he is not being forced but in order to marry a muslim woman he should be, he is free to refuse Islam and marry someone else. But it is important for dawah and protecting our daughters, we can win by protecting our daughters from the fire and getting the man to the truth, of course this situation is not desirable but if someone is tested by that turn it in some good with permission of Allah swt
Where can I find the recitation added at the beginning and at the end?
Wow I have been seeing soo many ladies marry non Muslim men it's sad, when the men say my wife is Muslim. May Allah help our children
I have seen a lot of the opposite, but either way it's not good.
@@misami3537 Exactly, I've only seen Muslim men marry non-Muslim women and it's distasteful and unwise. As for Muslim women marry non-Muslim men, I haven't seen it but it is sad. I'd rather stay single than chose a man over Allah SWT. This is why it's so important to think rationally and keep emotional distance from the opposite sex, even when discussing marriage rather than fall in love willy-nilly.
Well i also have seen dozens of muslim men who marry non-muslim women and no one says anything. So what's your point? except for being sexist ofc
@@puurrrr we rule by Allah's shariah. So if a man marries a Christian or jews who is chaste then the marriage is permissible but for a woman they cannot marry non Muslim women
@@programferris1018 absolutely wrong. It is permissible for both. Stop being sexist.
Better to live in muslim lands rather than settling in western countries and later face this situation?
If you ask 100 Muslims in most of the Islamic countries if they would like the opportunity to go to Western countries, how many do you think would prefer to move, 90, 95, 97 out of a 100?
@@theastronomer5800 funny thing is islam is projected to be bigger than christianity in the uk now very shortly
First and foremost it all starts at home. . .
Standards are planted at home from what the children sees.
Then ongoing seminars for the obligations of a man (husband) and obligations of woman (wife).
All imams of a masjid or the designated wedding officer or wedding office of that islamic center must have. . . .i repeat, must have a pre wedding seminar as a requirement of that office if parties approach them for officiating niqah.
Of course there must be a record/registry for the attendees and when and where of seminars.. (for record keeping and easy access for evidence of attendance purposes). . . a fee can be collected (or not) for these seminars.
These seminars must be posted in the bulletin boards or announced regularly so that parents can plan.
Just a something
The best Qur'an recitation I've heard in my life.. who is that?
If you mean the intro/outro, it is a nasheed, not Qour’an and from Ibraheem Bakeer
@@amelkatrin3464 the intro isn't Qur'an?
Look what is written under the video . Not Qour’an , but beatiful yes
It is called: " bakat ayni "
Here's the link for the nasheed
czcams.com/video/90cK-nAimJo/video.html
The parents need counselling first & foremost reg t above issue....they should have a strong religious base and open minded and rest leave it to Allah's plan
Assalumu Aleykum shaykh, wonderful khutbah on a very important topic, I wanted to ask if the woman actually considers it a marriage in direct contradiction to the Quran, can she still be considered a Muslim? and also shaykh I understand you view 18-19 as the age for marriage, but most if not all of the issues you raised plague those younger, I know it may be shocking to hear but for many the damage has already been done by that age, its not strange in the west to be under 18 and to have had multiple relationships and even abortions and I think we should no longer ignore this being a fact.
Masha Allah hazrath.. some ppl tik tok couples who r married out of Islam .. is need to be condemned as well ..
Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on....you are no longer a caveman...
@@1414141x no brother..,the ideologies are just strict and not barbarian .. islAm is for modern world .. Bt u know the western human world don like discipline .. they need fierce independence which leads to lots of mental disorders .. their mindset are deprived oly towards money .. islam puts a halt to various human desires .. Bt it’s alll good .. the most famous intelligent comedian Dave Chappell converts himself to islam nd still a Muslim .. Bt y he has to do tat ???? Answer is within ..
This is indeed a crisis. Muslim men don’t want to marry Muslim women and vice versa. It’s awful.
It's mostly the men
What is there is a shahada but we know a lot of time it is done to justify the marriage - do we just accept it and give benefit of doubt?
Yes we accept it at face value at the time, based on this hadith.
Usamah ibn Zayd reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, sent us on an expedition. In the morning we attacked Al-Huraqat of Juhaynah. I caught hold of a man and he said, “There is no god but Allah!” but I stabbed him. Then it occurred to me that I should mention that to the Prophet. The Prophet said, “Did he say ‘there is no god but Allah’ and you killed him?” I said, “O Messenger of Allah, he only said it fearing the weapon.” The Prophet said, “Did you tear open his heart to know if he meant it or not?” The Prophet continued to repeat this to me until I had wished I had not embraced Islam until that day.
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6478, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 96
So take it at face value but from then on see the actions to see if they back up the testimony
Honestly, I don't think it's something the parents have full control over either, Shaykh. If you raise your children in a non-Muslim country (US, Europe, Canada, Australia, especially certain Western countries that are very xenophobic and Islamophobic), you have no choice but to send your children to public schools and universities which inevitably exposes them to non-Muslim people who become their circle of friends and acquaintances so this happens. Even in my own community, where marriages to non-Muslims were fairly rare, it's becoming much more common for those who live in the US. It's much less common if you raise your children in a Muslim country like the Middle East, Pakistan, Indonesia maybe but for those who come to the more Western countries, the parents can't fully stop it unless they send their children to Islamic schools (which are rare) or homeschool - but even then nothing is guaranteed, especially in this day and age where haram outside influences like social media can't be shut out.
With all due respect, did Shaykh miss the part wherein if the non Muslim converts to Islam just for the sake of marriage.....what should our stand be?
It is technically okay. I have relatives who married white people that converted.
“Such a marriage is not a marriage”
Not if you’re in the west. It’s most definitely a marriage. In fact, your Nikah in most western countries is it valid alongside the law of the land. I think it’s time missing either assimilated to the countries which have taken them in or then live in a shariah country where they can have all their wishes under the sharia.
What he is saying is that in the eyes of Allah swt such a marriage is not a valid marriage. It doesn’t matter if the west accepts it or not.
Marriage is defined by Allah not by insane ever changing Western standards. If you don't like Allah's laws (the sharia), move out of His dominion.
@@wakemeup38 But he is living in the west. If you don’t like the laws and norms of the west, move out of that domain.
@@thirstfortruth8904 he isn’t saying it’s not legal in the United States what he is saying is that in our religion it forbidden. It’s just like a religious Christian family objecting to their son marrying a gay man, legally there is nothing wrong with it, hell even mayors and other political leaders officiate them. But religiously the family is against it because they believe it is sinful and against the teachings of the Bible. Same thing here but instead of a homosexual marriage it is a non-Muslim man marrying a Muslim women. It’s forbidden in our religion and a sinful and immoral act. She may not face any repercussions in this world for what she wants to does but there is hell and judgment day.
@@thirstfortruth8904 The "West" and the East are all owned by Allah. His laws are the only ones that are worth obeying completely; everchanging Western laws are irrelevant. So move out of His dominion if you can
What about ladies who get there partner to convert to Islam before marriage? Is that OK?
Yes that is okay
Yes it is fine, but it cannot be superficial. For example he cannot say shahada then after the wedding go to church or worship shiva etc…
What are the requirements of Islamic marriage contract ?
Pretty simple actually.
1. 2 Muslim witnesses at least
2. The closest Muslim guardian of the girl
3. Someone to officiate the marriage like an Islamic judge or imam
4. Some sort of written contract stating the mahr (dowry to the bride) and the duties and responsibilities of both parties plus any conditions or agreements they have made
Just saying, but perhaps we should also be discussing the issue of Muslim women working in mixed workplaces.
Nothing wrong with mixing the segeration comes from the fact we don't pray salah with women shoulder to shoulder or side to side if it was like that since the start of Islam segeration wouldn't be a thing at all
❤️❤️❤️
Assalamaleikum wa rahimtullahi wa barakatohu. Nikaah can only be respected by Mutaqoon. The boy is not Mutaqun.
The good families are never as they seem. I know someone who got in an arranged marriage, veryr eligous fam. Man was useless.
Women making their own decisions! No wonder he is panicking! Congratulations to the happy couple.
Too much pampering kids results in situations, when they refused to listen to parents advice
parents often demand kids respect them but they show zero kindness and respect to the kids. then when the kids don't listen when older, the parents act shocked. arrogance of the adults in our community cause all problems. in south asian countries most of the youth have almost left islam because of this, most of the atheists i met here also have very bad manners. atheism is 99% about emotion not about logic. in the west at least you guys have imams that understand the changing culture, but here in south asia the imams are absolutely blind, they stay in their tiny circle and ignore rest of the population. another major major problem is these old school ppl thinking that islam is only about salah, fasting, hijab, etc and they don't teach kids any manners from the sunnah or anything more that would help develop the love of allah and our rasul. we need to teach kids to think and reason rather than react (see discrete mathmatics), kids who can think and trust parents, you can discuss and reason with them and bring common sense in them, else only ask dua for miracle. 🤷♂️ i think what bro hamza tzortziz is doing with sapience institute is beautiful, we need to also empower youth with tools to tackle doubt in their head in a rational manner.
Let’s be honest with the sister here, if the guy already has her throwing away a huge religious requirement, what makes her think he will respect the other aspect of her religion or have his kids practice something he thinks is false or made up. Me speaking as a father myself, I wouldn’t want my kids to believe in something I don’t respect and think it’s a waste of time and energy.
She is betting on someones promises. She is betting on loosing her parents and her relationship with God for someone’s conditional love that might go away at any time. If the relationship starts off this badly then is it worth your salvation or your family? Unless you don’t believe, and that is another issue. Maybe he already instilled doubts in her mind. Living in sin for so long, having a relationship for years in secret also decreases your iman. What does she think the marriage will do? Does it fixes her relationship with him? Is it for tax purposes? It is an invalid matrimony in Islam. He has her believing in his own false beliefs as if the marriage accomplishes anything.
Yes, folow Islam, medeival ideology in a modern world. Move on..........
@@1414141x you do realise western civilisation is built on the Islamic golden age development. The surgical utensils used today was invented in Islamic Spain. The understanding of Plato and Socrates was derived from a Muslim philosopher Averroes called “the commentator” by western thinkers of the “enlightenment”… so be a little humble lol also the idea that ideology changes every century is an idiotic idea. Ideology doesn’t change that’s why Islam is still here after 1500 years. Ideologies evolve based on peoples needs. So if a person thinks their religion is important now then it isn’t outdated it actually shows the robustness of that ideology..
@Mona S if you believe in the ummah then you believe that what affects one part of it affects the rest of it, like a body. If you say I don’t care about them then do you wish for ur bother what you wish for urself. You call it gossip I call it a lesson. Do you care if your daughter or sister fall for the same mistake? Do you even think what she did is wrong?