The career of a UFC fighter who can't fight - Fumble Dimension Episode 8
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- čas přidán 13. 08. 2021
- Stupid Crapface returns! This time the Fumble Dimension crew puts him in UFC 4, the only problem is that Stupid Crapface doesn't want to fight... at all.
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LET'S GO!!!
LET’S GO!!!
LET'S GO!!!
🆗🆒
LESSGOOOOOOO
Kofie please make a video on Haikyuu, Prince of Tennis, Eyeshield 21, Slam Dunk etc etc
The idea of the coach, year after year, realising "its that time again" going to the fight to yell "yeah, get him!" for about 90 seconds before going home and never speaking of it again is very pleasing to me.
He just knows that’s the easiest paycheck he’s ever gonna get as a fighting coach! 😂
he's getting paid he knows his priorities
Makes you wonder if he ever visited him on one of his undoubted many trips to the hospital.
Only coming back to this to rewatch it did I realize: While Stupid Crapface is constantly being knocked into mandatory medical suspensions, nobody seems to have noticed _Noel Valencia only ever fought to paste Stupid Crapface across the mat._
12:21 First fight against Valencia, his record is 8-2-0; he knocks out SCF for 9 months, and is now 9-2-0. 15:18 Fight 2 vs Valencia, his record is now 9-3-0; Valencia pastes SCF, and is now 10-3-0. 22:29 Fight 3, his record is now 10-3-0. It's been _years_ since the first bout. 3 of his last 4 fights were against SCF, and all 3 were absolute massacres. That's some dedication to spite.
"No one has tweeted at us in 9 years"
Wow EA really dialing up the realism in this one
I was crying laughing when he said that
My head canon is that Valencia muted him a long time ago.
Crapface:Valencia ::Jennifer Rubin: Andrew Cuomo
Yeah that really wasn't a big hit, it just landed right where it hurts more
@@mrpaul79 yes ahahahahah
I’d imagine if this was real life dude would have more than ten fans at retirement. I know I’d watch and root for some toolbag that was fighting once a year to get pummeled and not fight back in any way. He’d be a legend loved by all.
People have a strange relationship to extreme underdogs. Like how many professional sports teams get curbstomped every match and yet there is still going to be that one cheering section and little online fandom who wants to hang around for the day when they finally make it.
Hell the Chicago Cubs have turned into an art form, sustained its fandom for literal decades despite only ever being a contender once in a blue moon before 2015.
@@andrejg4136 The entire fabric that held the city of Boston together unraveled in October of 2004 and the place will never be the same, for better or worse. It's just another city now (I say being from there and kinda saddened by the fact.)
@@andrejg4136 soooo the Buffalo Sabres? Cause they will never make the playoffs again
There is one guy right now who is fighting and has 99 losses! He takes any fight and has been submitted like 40 times. Wtf!
@@theleap2946 Thanks. I just googled it. He’s my new favorite mma fighter. When people throw punches he’s so good at blocking them with his face it’s near superhuman.
Next fumble dimension video should be in the NHL series where your player only looks to instigate fights when he's on the ice!
I did this once in a BAP (I called it my Rage File), and had gotten so many PIMs that it actually went into the negotiates due to bit overflow. It was extremely entertaining, and I highly recommend trying it. I once got 11 minutes worth of penalties in one go: a minor, double-minor, and a fight.
That’s a great idea
I've found it suprisingly difficult to get into lots of fights...
@@reaganharder1480 just shoot anytime it’s offside and someone will come fight you
@@derekyang1949 shoot the puck at the goalies after whistles works too
I can't wait for a Madden story mode that includes getting a concussion that fogs the screen and deletes some of your past stats randomly.
Damn lol
Everywhere At The End of Crapface
Tua timeline
Also a sexual assault / domestic violence arc
I love the idea of seeing a guy who cowers in fear at a punching bag and thinking:
"Yes, I'm going to enter this guy into an official MMA fight."
His trainer was Glass Joe
@@MrSkerpentine Nah, Gabby Jay at least tried throwing punches occasionally.
You'd be surprised who can land a bout on undercards. I've seen people in pro boxing matches who literally would get beat by the average human.
Today's lesson: Hire a fight coach who's not an enabler.
This video is basically "Getting CTE speedrun any%"
I like to imagine the coach despised Stupid. He took the best years of his life from him. He believed in Stupid. He thought he was up next. As revenge, he one day decided to cut Stupid off. No texts, no calls. The only time we'd see him is when he shows up to watch Stupid get his ass beat before quietly walking out the back door.
I assume that by that point, he's not even officially involved in any way (although Stupid thinks he still is). He's just going to the fights for the personal satisfaction of it all.
Coach could've been earning serious money if Stupid Crapface actually lived up to his expectations.
I imagine having such a terrible fighter under your wing must've damaged the coach's reputation in the fighting and coaching community.
@@hoki0624 I submit that it is not Stupid Crapface's fault if Coach is a terrible judge of fighting potential.
@@ZGryphon That's the thing. Coach only took in Stupid Crapface because he had heart and grit. The first training session (about striking) should've been a giveaway of how much talent Stupid Crapface has.
that's cold
"We have a concussion, are you going to make us count to 270?" ...beautiful stuff
Just like that another iconic Jon quote is born! 😂
“Nobody has tweeted at us in 9 years. Our coach hasn’t talked to us in 8” 😂 had me rolling… great stuff as always! Kofie + Jon = must watch
I almost choked on my water during this line.
And I immediately thought of the scenario where he shows up to fights then disappears! Omg I was crying thinking of what a real life version of this would be like.
When Jon said "are you really going too make us count too 270" lmao
How i missed the Dimension. Stupid Crap Face is the greatest Protagonist of all time.
Nah man
MR. FUMBLE BABY
More of a Clarence Beeftank fan myself
He's a classic, but he's no BEEFTANK
The coach that stopped associating with us outside of what the contract required of him was the absolute best bit.
Even of it's on purpose it's nice knowing there is always someone out there worse at playing video games than I am. Thanks guys.
1 thousandth like!
@@theEWDSDS lol. Had no clue.
This is the first notification I've ever gotten for this 2 year old post.
"Meniscus tear and a torn ACL. I'd...retire!"
So would I, Kofie. I suffered a meniscus and MCL tear in 1999 when me, a dog, and a football arrived at the same place at the same time at a family barbecue and the 60-pound Labrador retriever in question completely wiped out my right knee.
Stupid Crapface is barely going to be able to get out of bed and put his clothes on in the morning in oh, about 22 years.
Moral of the story- don't do that.
Did you at least catch it?
@@JakeyIce I like to think that they both had the football in their mouths and were growling at each other as they tugged.
@@JakeyIce Late to the reply, but the ball was a few inches over my head; if I'd been 6'5" and not 5'10" I'd have had a play on it. Incomplete pass but the dog got whistled for pass interference and unsportsdoglike conduct.
@@SimuLordunsportsdoglike killed me
9:04 Mr Crapface's devotion to radical pacifism is so great, he won't even slap a hi-five. Respect.
What an amazing career for SCF. Can't believe it's over already. He might not be able to walk anymore but with his newly shaped brain, he can now taste colors.
This made me cackle!🤣
“Newly shaped brain” is incredible and hilarious lmao
I don't even need to get pummelled into the mat repeatedly to taste colors. My brain just came prepackaged that way.
18:16 Referees don't work for companies, they work for state athletic commissions. So you might find Herb Dean in a regional promotion. just FYI.
Noel Valencia is going to haunt this series somehow. His pettiness is legendary.
I was really hoping the finale would be Valencia part IV. I wonder if you can die in the ring in this game? Would have been a fitting end to Stupid Crapface's career.
@@rmyers99 Honestly with the way he got ragdolled and his neck just kinda went crooked in fight 1 against Valencia I thought he had died then.
I mean, that would be 'real', getting kicked so hard you broke your neck against the ringpost, but I don't think we want that in our commercial gaming product.
@@rmyers99 I would have loved to have seen that. And even more funny, Valencia was a scrub wasn’t even that good. Like he was angry at his own shitty career that Stupid Crapface was his scape goat or something.
Is he based on a real person? I need to know.
@Mateo Hodge I just figured since the league they use is some old defunct one that UFC bought the rights to, maybe he's some fighter from like the 90s or early 2000s they just still had likeness rights to. That would make it extra hilarious.
"We are truly fighting in the age of loneliness"
AHHHHH he said the thingggg
There’s something beautiful about getting L I T E R A L L Y destroyed your entire career and still having ten fans cheering you on till the end
Those are dedicated fans truly with you to the end
They're With Stupid
My money is on them being the fighter's family
If stupid has 10 fans i have 9 friends. If stupid has 5 fans i have 4 friends. If stupid has 1 fan im still shouting his name from the rooftop. If stupid has no fans i have been killed by the cia
Not that jon bois reads these comments, but I recently went back and read all the old "breaking madden" articles and between his knack for written comedy and the gifs, just like Years ago , I had tears and hurting stomach from laughter.
This always carries over to fumble dimension, but crapface is the pinnacle and I come back to this video every few months. Classic!
The fact that cruelty is programmed into UFC 4 fighter A.I is not something I thought I’d learn today
Palhares has entered the chat
I had a dream where Kofie and Jon made an episode of fumble dimension where they played NHL but they could only shoot behind the red line and it was so detailed that i tried looking it up after i woke up
Maybe it was a premonition 😂😂
Did anything interesting happen?
@@publiusii4246 they didn’t score a lot, surprisingly
They did make one exactly like that.
czcams.com/video/dQw4w9WgXcQ/video.html
Problem is that it probably wouldn't be that good, since icing's a thing. It would just be a ton of whistles.
Here's a thought - how about someone with all their stats in shooting, who can only skate up the ice and shoot? Call him Puck Hogg or something.
my favorite part is at 9:04 when the devs clearly didn't expect you to make a guy this short
wow i completely missed that
@@juneguts so did he
"There isn't even a ref. Stupid Crapface literally has to fall asleep to dream him into existence" laughed so hard i had to re-do my makeup. omg
I'm genuinely glad Stupid Crap Face gets a chance to shine solo here. Even back when he was ruining the NBA he didn't really stand out. He was the original 40 overall, sure, but he immediately got buried even in that very first draft class.
Also "Story Mode Flexibility" is a great term and I plan to find a way to use it somewhere someday.
He unfortunately never played an NBA game, instant retirement.
@@doublebraincell6458 But his clones did.
1:52 "You will never strike his spirit."
Repeated concussions later... "OW, MY SPIRIT!"
As someone who has torn a meniscus, you don't keep fighting after that. I remember trying to stand back up and just crumbling straight back to the ground. Poor Stupid
"I could make like 48 different anime references in this video but I'm just not going to."
I believe it.
See what you did there
I only believe in the heart of the cards.
Thank you, Fumble Dimension. I'll always be hooked on you.
Believe in yourself. Don't believe in me who believes in you. Don't believe in you who believes in me. Believe in you who believes in you!
Perfect. Super Perfect.
The poetry that was Stupid Crapface’s career will always be remembered. He went out doing what he did best, taunting. Legendary
He mattered.
I refuse to watch any more of the beef series until they cover Crapface vs Valencia.
Crappy Beef
0% longevity. Never won a fight in over 10 years of fighting. Starts the fight with a taunt, instantly smashed in the face, fight over in 10 seconds. I haven't laughed that hard in forever
I think we all smile when we see these in our subscriptions box
I am literally crying laughing at the "One last taunt"
Noel Valencia: "HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON OLD MAN?"
Stupid Crap Face is truly an all-around athlete
Truly the Jim Thorpe of our generation
Equally skilled in every sport!
The last fight had me dying. I’m still laughing.
In the middle of a taunt, Stupid Crapface gets rocked 😂
haha Jon actually referenced watching UFC on illegal streams, what a legend
What kind of weirdo likes his blood sport with a credit card bill and ads for real companies though? It makes no sense, pirate streams or bust
@@THEmuteKi Problem is that I have no idea where to find a bootleg stream, so I just don't watch.
Coach Davis's relentless positivity is what we all need in these trying times.
His positivity relents for about 8 years in the middle of Stupid Crapface’s career
This was the most efficient fumble dimension, because all hope was already exhausted at the onset of the experiment. Kudos.
"Just call it 9 months! We just suffered a concussion, you're really going to make us count to 270?!" best quote of the whole video.
It's a shame sports career modes don't know how to handle extreme circumstance. The fight contracts just felt like the game saying, "No, you will stay here until I say so."
I mean in real life those concussions would mean retiring. But jobbers who lose all the time do get a lot of work. They need someone to build those records...
I’ve seen skyrim pacifist playthrough but never thought I’d see a ufc career pacifist playthrough.
12:33 the beef history we need
7:31 coach like this is assult
10:49 hey stupid😂
5:50 no no
6:16 is kofie crying
Had a buddy who had a similar career as Mr. Crapface. Except after his knockouts(him getting knocked out, not the other way around), they let him fight within 2 months! He fought for about 1 1/2 years and retired with a 1-5 amateur record. But it takes guts to do that and I have nothing but respect for him!
Have a lot of respect for you guys too, great video Kofie! Can’t wait for the last falcons vid!
Watching this after Fighting in the Age of Loneliness is the one-two punch I never knew I needed
“Maybe they’ll even make a beef history on us someday.”
Will: “we’re….not gonna do that”
“Just say nine months! We have a concussion, are you going to make us have to count to 270?”
I think I found their next April fool's day video
25:17
"[You] put on some of the best fights the sport has ever seen."
Well that's one way to look at it. I'm glad the game appreciates the pacifist approach as much as we do.
that final retirement fight was the greatest victory lap i've ever seen XD i chuckled heartily for a minute straight.
6x the length of the match!
You really have to bring back Clarence BEEFTANK.
EDIT: They did bring back Clarence BEEFTANK.
Crapface versus Beeftank, now that's an MMA card we all want to see.
I love the idea of a take on this video's concept where the fighter will take no offensive action (as BEEFTANK, the gentlest of men, would not), but, unlike Stupid Crapface, is basically indestructible. The game engine would _not_ know how to handle that. It's probably not achievable with the fighter config tools in the game, though.
i mean, this is pretty much just cm punks career except more than two fights
I thought the same exact thing when I saw the title!
More like Ben Askren
@@hawthornedouglas wtf are you on about? Ben askren has only lost 2 fights out of 22
@@hawthornedouglas casual alert
@@michaelcantu6071 Nah Ben Askew is a bum.
Man, Jimmy Hopkins really fell on hard times after graduating from Bullworth.
this is the most i’ve laughed at a youtube video in a long time and it’s only halfway over, kofie and john you are national treasures
Thank you 😭😭
This is incredible. Tears of uproarious laughter for 20 minutes.
22:16 Stupid looks so innocent here. It's giving me extreme acid flashbacks and now I'm crying bc I'm laughing so hard 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
21:50 "He has to fall asleep to dream him into existence"
This is the origin of the most depressing superhero 😭
Based on his records, I don't think Noel Valencia fought anyone else. He was 7-3 before the first fight, then 8-3 and finally 9-3 years later. He was so petty he only fought Crapface
jon: questions if this poor mans suffering is worth it
kofie: HIEUGHHIEUGHHIEUGHHIEUGHIEHUGUHIEHUGUHHUGH
conclusion: jon finna fire kofie
I love the idea of a radical pacifist with a Nate Diaz attitude.
“If I was stupid crapface, I would take the money and run. But that’s just me”
Amen
He's basically MMA version of Bob Cyclone.
Cyclone did it all over the span of a few months. State boxing commissions were just different back then (or Cyclone fighting as Bob Ciccolone or whatever variation actually fooled them and he got around a suspension/medical loss of boxing license.)
I know it isn’t a “sport” but
a Fumble Dimension based around a My Career / GM / Universe mode in a wrestling game would be fun
"but he left his career the same way he began it: with a concussion"
I was laughing so hard I was afraid I was going to pass out. Got it under control, then heard Kofie laughing and that set me off again.
This was honestly one of the most depressing things I've ever watched. And I'm pretty sure this is what it's actually like for low-level MMA fighters. So good job, guys?
Oh boy, here we go again! Surprise fumble dimension
He didn't even succeed at not fighting. He just went out there and got beaten to hell again and again, for over a decade. It's as if the game forgot he was there, and just called it when you finally made the game remember.
Alright let’s see what magic the Fumble Dimension has for us!
The commentary between you 2 in between the fights is great. I really think this is a great and original concept to play the games but have commentary in between. Very good stuff.
I love how it calls all the other injuries by name, but then you have "Seeing Stars"...
“My coach hasn’t contacted me in 8 years.” 😂😂😂
I never understood why two wrestlers didn’t just decide to make it a wrestling match since they couldn’t punch each other with Shamrock vs Severn…
"No one has tweeted at us in 9 years, our coach hasn't talked to us in 8 years" 😂😂
Oh lord he lost to a dude wearing a shirt.
Jon could talk about about anything and it would be fun to watch. He could even talk about something as boring as people named Bob and it'll still be... Oh wait
This is Kofie erasure
A fighter who doesn't want to fight? OH MY GOD YOU'VE MADE FLOYD MAYWEATHER!
The fact that he doesn’t even hit the high-five is consistent if anything
I’m going to a wedding later today, and that still won’t bring me the joy of finding a new Fumble Dimension by accident
If you didn't screw one of the bridesmaids, did you really go to a wedding?
@@SimuLord I went to a wedding in April and all the brides maids had BFs with them...lol it wasn’t a fun realization.
"Stupid Crapface leaves his career as he started it... With a concussion"
I howled
That last taunt got me. I was smirking and giggling the entire video, but his last fight made me lose my mind. Im a different person now than I was before watching this video.
fighting like sanji when he’s matched up against a woman
Kofie’s laugh is so infectious
And the spirit of Bob cyclone lives on
1:38 I love you guys still finding a spot to sneak in one of the major themes of Fighting in the Age of Loneliness, the greatest sports documentary ever produced, even over here in this hellscape that is t he Fumble Dimension.
The funniest part is, there is actually fighters like this, I know a local guy who was 0-26 at one point and fought for 100USD lol
Tossing another comment on here to say thank you for including the childlike giggling, Kofie. Really makes the hits sing.
I love how much Kofie enjoyed this episode
I see secret base i click it. Just that simple
Kofie, your voice reminds me of Ira Glass from NPR.
I love everything from fumble dimension, and look forward to your next video
"Sticks and stones may break bones, but words sting forever."
The Saga of Stupid Crap Face is the greatest sports story of all time!
also Kofie, my bro, your laugh is magical
"Hey stupid" made me spit out my drink 😂
Can someone make a supercut of kofie laughing please? I couldn't tell whether it was canned laughter or actually him sometimes lmao
No it’s all me I’m a maniac
@@KofieWhy 8:15 is deranged behavior
Kofie, I can't tell if you're laughing or crying or both.
This video genuinely made me laugh harder than I have in months thank you
This feels like a speedrun on how quick the word "concussion" can make me cry tears of laughter.
270 days!!
I went on a binge of Fumble Dimension and really enjoyed the final fight of his career. That cheered me up after a long day.