You do not know how I grateful I am for this. I am relatively intelligent and perform well and school yet I was called out and even mocked for talking at such a slow pace. Day by day I am noticing improvements in how I talk and I sincerely thank you.
I feel like my filter is so strong i can't even come up with things to say, and everyone is so used to me being shy it feels like they never start conversations with me
I do that all the time like you mentioned thinking to myself if I said something offensive to someone or if I did something wrong.I may look back at certain things that i did and am embarrassed.
There was a cute guy at work that would make me very nervous and I couldn't say a thing in his presence. I dig deeper and it was anxiety. I started doing mindfulness and my anxiety got better. Now he is my boss and I stand my ground so he takes my job seriously and I make him nervous 😂 it wasn't meant to be but I learned to face my anxiety. He is cute but I need to see respect before I consider him as someone I want to hangout with.
Thank you so much for this. I haven't had a chance to use this as I literally just watched it, but I have a question. I really want to talk to people and I try sometimes, (these people are often my old friends) but I cannot get a conversation to carry on because I am so bland that I have absolutely nothing to talk about. Do you have any advice for this? I always find that, if I say something, people do not find it funny or interesting and it always stumps the conversation. Also, if the conversation is not 1 to 1 or someone isn't speaking directly to me, I always get absolutely terrified to interject or join in. If you have any advice, please let me know. Thanks a lot.
What I got from this was say the first thing that comes to ur mind, stop thinking so much and most of the time people don’t even remember what you said because everyone is saying whatever anyways😌
Dr. Aziz, my problem seems to be related to finding words when engaged in a conversation. I have no such problem when thinking or writing, only in conversation.
Dr Aziz, I really like your videos. I have intense anxiety. I only get out of bed for a job I dislike, bills are high, and I don't feel I have secure connections with ppl so I look to please them. My life feels so out of control because I desperately try to break out of the people pleasing bt I don't know if I'm on the right track. I don't know what listening to my voice even sounds like. I am 26 years old...no boyfriend, no clear direction in life. I need stability. I was seeing a counselor but she was too expensive. Any tips on where to start esp. when people pleasing is so strong for me? I try to bring the filter down so I can talk to ppl authentically but I literally freeze up every time I try to bring something up and I'm left listening to what other people have to say and I usually agree with them or awkwardly disagree with them.
hi doc been watching video,s worked great for me putting things in to action, but went out sat nite with mate to club having great time when we noticed 4 ladies looking our way so when i went to the bar i asked them if they would like to join us (first time ever i have done this) success they came over & general talking even though i am very shy i do like to dance music was playing so i asked one girl to dance she said no thanks i went anyway,when i returned she asked me if i was gay sum what bemused by this question & had few beers i sed to her give me a kiss then you will find out! she declined and left. question is why do women who don,t know me say im gay not the first time this has happened. its funny as none of my male friends see this within me,your advise would be appreicated,dave
bobbysatwat Dude, congrats on stepping up and walking over to those women to talk to them. That's HUGE! Haha, great response to her question as well : ) Why do women ask if you're gay? That could be a lot of things. It could be in the way you dress, your mannerisms. It could be in the way you relate to them. You might be cutting off your sexual energy towards them as well (out of fear/inhibition). Women pick up on that as well. For more help, and a free eBook, go to 30DaysToDatingMastery.com
hey doc, I am a university student, and I am always playing future and past events in my mind and keep thinking maybe I should have say this instead of that, also I often want to please ppl all the tym and jealousy is a huge problem which is why I don't have gud frnd, to be honest no frnd ...plz tell me wat I should do and which would be a gud program for me.cheersSumi
I'm too hyperactive and uncalibrated. I will look like a wako lol. I need some filter and "composure" to look normal and confident (especially around girls lol).
I either say what’s on my mind or I don’t say anything but the thing is that it makes me look like a jerk. Basically how do I stop myself from being an asshole to people while still talking?
You do not know how I grateful I am for this. I am relatively intelligent and perform well and school yet I was called out and even mocked for talking at such a slow pace. Day by day I am noticing improvements in how I talk and I sincerely thank you.
Thank you Dr. Aziz🙏🏻
I can so relate when you said in the middle of conversation I stop and look back to what I said.
Thank you A LOT for this one, Dr Aziz!! Great information!! Also the 'Don't look back' point was so so needed!
Glad it was helpful!
I feel like my filter is so strong i can't even come up with things to say, and everyone is so used to me being shy it feels like they never start conversations with me
Sincerely appreciate you sharing this value. I feel this will help me a lot for the next time I’m speaking with friends
I do that all the time like you mentioned thinking to myself if I said something offensive to someone or if I did something wrong.I may look back at certain things that i did and am embarrassed.
There was a cute guy at work that would make me very nervous and I couldn't say a thing in his presence. I dig deeper and it was anxiety. I started doing mindfulness and my anxiety got better. Now he is my boss and I stand my ground so he takes my job seriously and I make him nervous 😂 it wasn't meant to be but I learned to face my anxiety. He is cute but I need to see respect before I consider him as someone I want to hangout with.
Thanks for an awesome share!
Thank you so much for this. I haven't had a chance to use this as I literally just watched it, but I have a question. I really want to talk to people and I try sometimes, (these people are often my old friends) but I cannot get a conversation to carry on because I am so bland that I have absolutely nothing to talk about. Do you have any advice for this? I always find that, if I say something, people do not find it funny or interesting and it always stumps the conversation. Also, if the conversation is not 1 to 1 or someone isn't speaking directly to me, I always get absolutely terrified to interject or join in. If you have any advice, please let me know. Thanks a lot.
Yes, this is exactly how I feel like! :(
This is exactly what’s wrong with me right now, thank you I really thought I had autism
You're very welcome!
Sweet as...
That was really helpful conversion for me🙏
Glad you liked it!
3:00 this happens to me. I think "and if someone in the neighborhood hears me"?
I don’t know how I came across this but I’m glad I did. I really needed to see this!
What I got from this was say the first thing that comes to ur mind, stop thinking so much and most of the time people don’t even remember what you said because everyone is saying whatever anyways😌
sir, your sharing is very helpful, thanks a lot!
You're very welcome!
Excellent video! Thanks
Dr. Aziz, my problem seems to be related to finding words when engaged in a conversation. I have no such problem when thinking or writing, only in conversation.
04:15 Well there goes my pick up line
LOL
thanks alot its so good to me
Very good sir really loved your playlist
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you, are there any exercises to practise this? I don't speak to people much day-to-day
Try this daily exercise: czcams.com/video/0xUUEWW1baY/video.html
Dr Aziz, I really like your videos. I have intense anxiety. I only get out of bed for a job I dislike, bills are high, and I don't feel I have secure connections with ppl so I look to please them. My life feels so out of control because I desperately try to break out of the people pleasing bt I don't know if I'm on the right track. I don't know what listening to my voice even sounds like. I am 26 years old...no boyfriend, no clear direction in life. I need stability. I was seeing a counselor but she was too expensive. Any tips on where to start esp. when people pleasing is so strong for me? I try to bring the filter down so I can talk to ppl authentically but I literally freeze up every time I try to bring something up and I'm left listening to what other people have to say and I usually agree with them or awkwardly disagree with them.
mcmic1212
I pretty much have the same situation. I'm very interested in knowing how you're doing right now, share with me.
hi! you should sell The Confidence Code in amazon
kindle edition
I may have to look into that!
hi doc been watching video,s worked great for me putting things in to action, but went out sat nite with mate to club having great time when we noticed 4 ladies looking our way so when i went to the bar i asked them if they would like to join us (first time ever i have done this) success they came over & general talking even though i am very shy i do like to dance music was playing so i asked one girl to dance she said no thanks i went anyway,when i returned she asked me if i was gay sum what bemused by this question & had few beers i sed to her give me a kiss then you will find out! she declined and left. question is why do women who don,t know me say im gay not the first time this has happened. its funny as none of my male friends see this within me,your advise would be appreicated,dave
bobbysatwat Dude, congrats on stepping up and walking over to those women to talk to them. That's HUGE! Haha, great response to her question as well : )
Why do women ask if you're gay? That could be a lot of things. It could be in the way you dress, your mannerisms. It could be in the way you relate to them. You might be cutting off your sexual energy towards them as well (out of fear/inhibition). Women pick up on that as well.
For more help, and a free eBook, go to 30DaysToDatingMastery.com
hey doc, I am a university student, and I am always playing future and past events in my mind and keep thinking maybe I should have say this instead of that, also I often want to please ppl all the tym and jealousy is a huge problem which is why I don't have gud frnd, to be honest no frnd ...plz tell me wat I should do and which would be a gud program for me.cheersSumi
I need a revised version I have no filter to a bad point
I'm too hyperactive and uncalibrated. I will look like a wako lol. I need some filter and "composure" to look normal and confident (especially around girls lol).
Check out my channel for videos on becoming a better conversationalist.
wow 🙏😔
I either say what’s on my mind or I don’t say anything but the thing is that it makes me look like a jerk. Basically how do I stop myself from being an asshole to people while still talking?
Just so the folks in the comments know, you have my full permission to ask what color my underwear are whenever you wish!
LOL
I ask too much random qeustions my friends all get annoyed😗 how do i start a new topic without asking qeustion?
I find that a question is one of the best conversation starters. Maybe it's time for a friend upgrade?
@@GetMoreConfidence i just realized i mispelled question,🤣anyways thanks for the tip
Other than asking a question, you can try sharing a story of your own
I hate hearing "Hassan is so quiet" all the time, I wish I could talk like normal people
You absolutely can!
@@GetMoreConfidence i saw this video and found it pretty informative, what other things can I do to be less quiet?
@@Hassan-zw9tb Practice and persevere !! That is my plan
🐱🤔😮
Thank you!