DOES IT GET EASIER? | MILITARY WIFE

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  • čas přidán 7. 09. 2024
  • Does it ACTUALLY get easier?? Yes and No...
    #militarywife #militaryspouse
    Winner: Handle: idance4mwahh Name: Nichole Black
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    About the Book Campaign: It all began about 2 years ago in June 2017. My husband was deployed for 6 to 8 months and because of it, I grew this huge pit in my stomach from the loneliness I knew I would have to endure, but also that I soon would. I would wake up alone, go to sleep alone and if I didn’t plan something that day, I would be alone. And through the first half of deployment, I thought, "This can’t be it. There has to be more than just feeling lonely all the time." However, as I was thinking through that and really spending time with God and in the Word, I felt like God was giving me this picture in my mind of having joy in loneliness!
    Now, when I first felt like He was telling me this, I was kind of skeptical! The idea of finding joy in loneliness just seemed crazy...like, how could I be joyful when I’m alone? That just didn’t seem real.
    I’ve always believed that God created us for relationship, which is true because, in the beginning, God told Adam that it is not good for man to be alone, thus creating Eve. So, that was my understanding of loneliness. I believed the reason why we are sad in loneliness is because we were created for relationship!
    However, as I started looking more into scripture, started studying the Bible more and just hearing what God was speaking to me, I began to realize that we were created for relationship not only humans, but also with God. So, when we are separated from God, we have this content feeling of loneliness or emptiness, because our spirit desires that relationship. When we draw closer to Him, we establish a relationship with Him that can be full of joy!
    So after that, I started thinking more about what it looks like to have joy during loneliness, I felt like God was shaping my heart to this reality. However, I didn't ever fully experience it during the time of deployment. I still wrestled with it. Honestly, not until March 2019, which is currently when I’m writing this book, did I feel this amazing joy in loneliness. (I feel like it so timely for God to allow me to experience this joy while I write the book!)
    My husband left for three weeks in March and during this time I really wanted to press into the joy in loneliness that God kept showing me. I prayed I don't want to write a book if I haven't even fully experienced it myself, so, God, I really need you to help me see what that looks like! And within the first week, I continued to have amazing times with Him! I would pray at night, I would worship in the morning I would read scripture asking the Holy Spirit to be a part of those times and each day my desire to spend time with Him grew, as did the joy of my heart! Of course, even through this, I was sad that my husband was gone. However, now I looked forward to the moments that I got to spend worshipping. The moments I got to spend praying and talking to the Father.
    And honestly, I have never experienced that type of joy before! I want to be honest about that because if you were to tell me that 3 years ago, I would think, "I don’t know how I’m ever going to feel joyful when my husband is gone, I love my husband and for him to be gone, well, it’s painful and it hurts and I don’t want him to leave!" However, now having experienced what God has shown me and experienced the amount of joy I felt while spending time with Him and in worship, it's just been an amazing experience that I want to share with everyone! My desire is for you to be able to find this type of joy for herself because I know that's God's desire.

Komentáře • 60

  • @makylatanner3543
    @makylatanner3543 Před 5 lety +38

    Military wife here. The hardest thing for me was when my husband was doing some speciality training and he was making memories with people who weren’t me. Even though they were guys I hated that he would be going to new restaurants without me and having those memories without me

    • @meli-8947
      @meli-8947 Před 5 lety +4

      MaKyla Tanner that’s how i feel right now . it sounds selfish but it feels worst when i don’t have anybody to hang out with nor hang out with him specifically. however , i do want him to occupy himself as much as possible.

    • @lexiebernal5713
      @lexiebernal5713 Před 5 lety +4

      awe I couldn't agree more. My heart breaks a little when my boyfriend sends picture of different places and foods they try on their free time and I can't be there with him to experience it with him.

  • @stephaniewoods68
    @stephaniewoods68 Před 5 lety +17

    I agree with you 100%! It never gets easier to say goodbye! My boyfriend and I always say see you soon! Being a military wife/girlfriend isn’t easy but, it is so worth it! You’re videos are so helpful and amazing Brit! Thank you!

  • @maddianne1267
    @maddianne1267 Před 5 lety +11

    I am so happy you talked about how saying bye triggered all of the other times you had to say bye, because you finally put my feelings into words. Every time my husband leaves, even if it is just for a 24 hr shift or a training, I flashback to every time he’s left, especially leaving before basic training and it breaks my heart every time. Eventually being alone does get easier, and learning to survive during the separations. Thank you for this video❤️

  • @DomoniqueRene
    @DomoniqueRene Před 5 lety +17

    fellow military wife and SMALL youtuber here and I could not agree with you more! 😭

  • @emilymccauley1676
    @emilymccauley1676 Před 5 lety +4

    My husband is in BCT right now and tho I am unbelievably proud of him, it is hard and on my bad days, it’s hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don’t know how I’ll handle him being deployed.

  • @alyssagalvez6055
    @alyssagalvez6055 Před 5 lety +7

    I really needed this today! My husband is army and just left for a 3 month minimum training with no contact until his graduation and it’s been a bit rough. Thank you for this!!

    • @biancalynn
      @biancalynn Před 5 lety

      Girl!!! I feel ya!!! It’s hard but we’re strong!!

  • @jessicajeffers1097
    @jessicajeffers1097 Před 5 lety +4

    The retriggering is so real i have to PTSD from airports

  • @Ester7894
    @Ester7894 Před 5 lety +7

    I’m a military girlfriend gosh it doesn’t get easier but some days are better then other days that’s for sure. Today is one of those sad days wanting to be with my sailor more then anything but knowing he’ll come home soon is what I think about.

  • @rachelbumiller7239
    @rachelbumiller7239 Před 5 lety +2

    When you said wanting to hold their hand and kiss them while they’re away, that hit home so much. It’s crazy what you miss about your spouse while they’re away. I always daydream about holding his hand out and about and just sweet moments together.

  • @taraspaulding311
    @taraspaulding311 Před 5 lety +2

    Thank you so much for this video. My boyfriend is currently at bootcamp and this has really eased my heart. Its so hard to be with out him

  • @Babyashlyy
    @Babyashlyy Před 5 lety +11

    Makes me feel better that I'm not alone lol my Marine is deployed

  • @kalynlacombe5746
    @kalynlacombe5746 Před 5 lety +3

    My husband has been deployed a few months now and your videos are always so relatable and make me smile!! Thank you!!

  • @Jennaaaaa536
    @Jennaaaaa536 Před 5 lety +2

    I just want to say thank you for everything that you post on your channel. It has helped me tremendously in my life. I'm in a military relationship and me and my SO started dating when I was 18 it was really rough with being able to cope with him being gone the first couple of months. Because I had never been in any previous relationships and he was and still is the only person I've loved as a SO. Im currently 19 and turn 20 this year and him and I have been dating for what will our first year together on the 27th. Watching your videos like these just helps in so many ways. Thank you.

  • @edenimhoff6605
    @edenimhoff6605 Před 5 lety +3

    I love you military related videos! My husband and I have been through 1 deployment together so far and we are going through another one at the end of this year but this one is going to be so much harder than the first one because we will have our first baby and he will be gone for the first 6 months of her life and to me raising a newborn without my person who helped me make her is already breaking my heart lol ❤️ thank you for this channel it helps me so much!

  • @Nancygracehearts
    @Nancygracehearts Před 5 lety +7

    Pregnancy glow 😍

  • @angML1
    @angML1 Před 3 lety

    I met my husband in training. I got out after I finished my first term to take care of our daughter who was 5 months old at the time. She’s now 12. My husband is in his 16th year active duty. It hasn’t gotten easier, it’s gotten worse. It’s harder to make friends as I get older. It was easy when kids were really young, but as they become more independent, it’s harder to meet other moms and make friends. Holding a job has been super hard because I have kids and he has a very busy schedule. He’s gone 5am to at least 6pm almost all days of the week on top of duty. He’s sent away a lot for underway time on a ship (navy), full long deployments, schools and extra training. It’s getting harder all the time. I feel more sad too every time he goes. That’s when a car breaks down, a washing machine stops working, a kid kicks a hole in a wall, I was in an accident and spent 2 weeks in hospital. It’s very very lonely. I’m here with the kids alone a lot. When my husband has port calls, he goes out with his friends a lot and I feel a little jealous. I know he needs it!! He had to go get out and blow off steam. But wow. Sometimes being taken care of financially doesn’t feel worth the sacrifices I make being alone all the time. I miss him now. Again. I can’t give up on our relationship, because our time together is beautiful. Just sucks!! Hopefully it will be worth it when he can retire young. I just can’t wait to see him every day without impending deployments. I can’t wait to travel WITH him. Our vision for our future is what gets us through. We are in Washington now too.

  • @kirstenbush3138
    @kirstenbush3138 Před 5 lety +5

    Love your personality and your videos! You are one of many youtubers that inspired me to create my channel! So grateful for any support!💖

  • @stefany6041
    @stefany6041 Před 2 lety

    Hey Brittani! I have been watching your channel for about 1 month now and I have to say that you have been a HUGE encouragement to me!

  • @Kalie_f
    @Kalie_f Před rokem

    I’m in a long distance relationship with this boy I met online and he is in the army. At first it was hard to understand him but getting to be there for him is always so hard, my parents told me to stop talking to him because I haven’t met him yet, he made plans to come see me but always have to change it. I don’t know if I should let go or be with him, because it’s long distance and I have never seen him before. Been knowing him for 7 months now.

  • @yolandavalencia3243
    @yolandavalencia3243 Před 5 lety

    Long story short... my husband got notified that we would be PCS’ing with only 3 months to prepare. After arriving and being in TLF for two weeks we were so happy to finally find a home off base due to the waiting list being three months long. We got settled in and literally two weeks after moving in we got notified that he would be deploying with only three weeks to prepare! With the news my heart sank and no it doesn’t get easier to say goodbye and feeling alone but you definitely learn to cope with it! The military family’s are always such a great help because who else understands the feeling of watching your spouse walk away! This is our first deployment and we aren’t even half way there yet! It’s been tough but with love patience and faith I know we’ll make it threw!!! I am proud to be a military wife!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️ thank you so much for this video!!!

  • @kyahrose5496
    @kyahrose5496 Před 5 lety +3

    This video was an absolute blessing

  • @amandasalazar2441
    @amandasalazar2441 Před 5 lety +2

    It is hard, also friendships do not get easier. Because of the reality of people transitioning and the PCS so often, I feel like you establish wonderful friendships, and then they move away. Cherish all the friendships you can have, even if you know they leave soon.

  • @philquintana7790
    @philquintana7790 Před 5 lety

    Mrs. Krebbs, you are a true blessing from the Lord. My wife was a shy girl from a small town but became a strong, confident woman during our career. The day I realized just how strong she was, was the day she said, "Your stripes mean something on base, in my house they mean nothing"!
    Her strength made our career. I never worried about anything involving home. We got orders? She took care of the move. I was TAD some place and something happened to one of the kids? I knew she would handle it. Her strength is the reason I was successful. If memory serves, I was a Sergeant when she started the "Girls Club" at church. Older wives would mentor the younger wives. It's been almost 15 years since we've been retired and she's still in touch with some of "her" girls.
    I truly hope your husband loves, respects and honors you like you deserve. I know the Lord will pour out His blessings on your family.
    Yours in Christ,
    P. D. Quintana
    SgtMaj USMC (ret)

  • @leahromero1670
    @leahromero1670 Před 5 lety

    I’m a military wife to a marine. And I 100% agree with you! My husband is deployed and So far I spent time with him twice. Goodbyes are hard and I try so hard to hold back emotions so he doesn’t feel bad. But he knows me so well. So how I cope with him being gone is by my busy life schedule. I go to work, attend college, hit the gym and attend mma training . Even at that there are times you lack and just wish he was there. But I would say what helped me was; get comfortable with being alone. It gets easier. Times it’s tough but sometimes you need that extra support from people who are in similar situations as you. So to anyone who’s going thru the emotions, stay strong and think positive.

  • @babumoon436
    @babumoon436 Před 5 lety

    Yes it’s not easy to hear “I’m leaving”. My husband is leaving for a week and it is not going to be easy because we love to share our day everyday and he’s my best friend always go to him on everything. However the positive about it (only if he’s leaving for a short period of time) we need some space too. I and he learn to trust each other and have our love even stronger. It is never easy to see him pack knowing the days is getting closer. When he’s gone a part of me is also gone because I have sleeping problem when he’s not around. I get anxious or worried all the time. It’s never easy or even adjust of being alone. Though it teach us some independence and remind ourself we are strong and that it will get better as the day get closer.

  • @blackjem1699
    @blackjem1699 Před 5 lety +2

    you look so gorgeous!!! and this video was so helpful thank you!

  • @ratanalieng
    @ratanalieng Před 5 lety +1

    thank you for this video, brittani ♡. i'm looking forward to learning how to cope with feelings of loneliness and anxiousness better. that's probably the hardest part for me at the moment. i'm glad that it can get easier 😊

  • @lindseynicole7395
    @lindseynicole7395 Před 3 lety +1

    so relieving to see another CHRISTIAN military wife 🥰

  • @susalkasarahi
    @susalkasarahi Před 5 lety

    I totally agree about the living without them and job points. When my husband was gone and we were in Chicago, I was so scared to leave my house and that sucked because I missed out on beautiful sites in the city during Christmastime. And I found work a lot faster when I moved to Virginia versus when I had first moved to Chicago.

  • @missytay1318
    @missytay1318 Před 5 lety

    Handling things in healthy ways, I love that. I’m beginning to notice my very unhealthy ways of how to deal w loneliness & time away from my partner. This video came out at a very good time. Thank you.

  • @denizo.4026
    @denizo.4026 Před 5 lety +1

    Your videos help so much Brittani! Love you!! ♥️♥️♥️

  • @meli-8947
    @meli-8947 Před 5 lety

    once my husband got into k9 and leaves for other trainings, i just lost it . i mean , i do my best to be happy, but it still sucks, especially when you move to a new area .
    still getting used to everything and i wish these days could go by faster .
    the only things to keep me going from the loneliness are phone calls from family, his phone calls, my dog, school, work, and definitely church .

  • @xoajade
    @xoajade Před 5 lety +1

    looking beautiful as always brit. love your whole mindset.
    xo

  • @candyheartpop6215
    @candyheartpop6215 Před 5 lety

    I commented on a different video of yours about one of my insecurities about being in a relationship with my bf who's currently in basic training but this is a different thing I'm having trouble with. I'd love to hear some advice since I dont really know where else to go and your channel has been so helpful learning more about military relationships. So me and my bf have been dating for almost 3 years (we broke up twice because of the sa.e reason as what I'm going to say below.) I suffer from depression and social anxiety and I'm having doubts about our relationship. My bf is very outgoing and he's the life of the party when we go out with friends or parties. Typically that sounds like a dream bf but I'm afraid I'm still not ready to be in a committed relationship. I do love him but I'm not sure I'm the gf he needs. I have trouble going to loud places such as groceries stores,malls,ceremonies, and dances. I rarely like going out and I do have problems dealing with emotions (due to family problems I'm not able to get the help I need with my mental health, I also come from a emotionally abusive family so my situation doesn't seem like it'll get better anytime soon.) My bf wants me to attend things I'm not comfortable with such as going to dances and parties so that's one of the reasons I'm having doubts with out relationship. I love him and I keep thinking he'd be better off with an outgoing gf. He also wants me to attend his basic graduation ceremony but just watching videos of graduations makes me anxious and I know I'm going to let him down when I dont show up. I do talk to him about the things I cant do and what makes me anxious but often times he won't exactly help. He kind of guilt tripped me into attending his JROTC military ball after I told him I didnt want to go because I know my anxiety will go through the roof if I attend. (I had an anxiety attack while we were dancing and had to leave early because I couldn't stop crying.) I dont know if I'm the only one having doubts about a military relationship while dealing with mental health complications and I dont know what to do with my doubts.

    • @candyheartpop6215
      @candyheartpop6215 Před 5 lety

      We broke up twice because I knew I wasn't mentally ready to be in a relationship but we ended up getting back together and each time we both thought we had "changed" (as in matured/learned how to handle our problems). I'm pretty sad thinking that maybe we're going to be separating again since my health is still the same as always and I feel like he deserves a girlfriend he can have by his side during military balls or someone who can attend his ceremonies.

  • @laylatorres4840
    @laylatorres4840 Před 5 lety +3

    My fiancé just left to marines bootcamp today 😓 I’m so use to seeing/talking him every single day and now I can’t do either one which is so hard to even think about ..... if anyone knows any tips/advice to help me get through this I would appreciate it :/

    • @Ashleybeautyandmore
      @Ashleybeautyandmore Před 5 lety +2

      Layla Husseini my boyfriend has been in the Marines about a year and a half. I would join groups on Facebook and find people who are in his company at bootcamp. I made a few great friends from that and it helped so much to have people who were going through the same thing. You got this! It flies by, it’s hard but trust me after a few weeks you get into a routine and the time goes by so fast. Lastly, I’d keep yourself as busy as possible and use this time to grow yourself in something. You got this I promise! He is safe and when you start getting letters it will get better. Not easy but better.

    • @laylatorres4840
      @laylatorres4840 Před 5 lety

      Ashley T thank you so much ❤️ like I said he left yesterday so I have to wait a couple days to find out exactly the address of where he is at so I can send the letters and find what company he is in for all that

    • @anamariavillafradez9106
      @anamariavillafradez9106 Před 5 lety

      My husband is almost finish with the marines for good. In boot camp they treat him like shit and he hated every single day over there. I only received like 2-3 letters from him because the drill instructor broke my letters in front of everyone and he didn’t have time to write back and they were messing with his mind (saying that his girlfriend at the time was cheating with Jody and all that bs🙄) .
      He will be mentally drained and his personality right after boot camp is gonna be different (serious most of the time)
      Good luck girl. It’s never easy but get used to it. Help him when you are with him and be positive.
      If he is in the field for 3-4 weeks or even in other city doing a field op just get into a hobby or get a job and join the Facebook page of the base near you to make some friends.

    • @allymiller1
      @allymiller1 Před 5 lety

      Keep yourself busy!!!

    • @laylatorres4840
      @laylatorres4840 Před 5 lety

      Ally Rebecca I’m trying but it’s like every little free time I get I think about him being gone 😩 and it’s only like 3 months but still lol that’s a long time go go without being able to reallly talk to him , you know
      And most videos I see people say that it’s not worth it, or it doesn’t work out or just negative things which sucks !

  • @ashleighfreeman3945
    @ashleighfreeman3945 Před 5 lety

    Everything you say is so true!!

  • @noel_and_elle1994
    @noel_and_elle1994 Před 5 lety +3

    Y’all live in Washington (where I live) and are from Texas (where I’m from) 😹

  • @meganlong2036
    @meganlong2036 Před 5 lety

    i really needed this video 💛

  • @linakay28
    @linakay28 Před 5 lety

    Dearest Brit & Con,
    did you two ever fight while separated? Things are just rough right now. I just want everything to be okay. I’m holding on, but it’s really heartbreaking.

  • @ELSEY007
    @ELSEY007 Před 5 lety +2

    How do you deal with the spontaneous conversations that occur with deployment? I would want to drop everything I am doing to talk to him, but it might not always be possible. Any advice? My boyfriend of 4 years is about to go into the Marines and Im trying to prepare myself.

    • @Maddddddddy
      @Maddddddddy Před 5 lety +3

      I am marine girlfriend. And bootcamp is for sure the hardest of everything no texting and no calling only writing letters. And they go threw so much stuff but in the end he gets to come home for 10 days take that time to do all that you love. Hes about to leave to mct. I'm gonna miss him so much but I know hes doing what he loves. And it's totally worth it.

    • @maddianne1267
      @maddianne1267 Před 5 lety +4

      Even though my husband is army, the phone calls especially in basic are hard. The first 2 times he called me I missed them because I was working or busy. I felt horrible at the time but in the end we both cherished them so much more. Your schedules may not line up 100% of the time and that’s perfectly okay, because you will learn to appreciate the times you have even more. Also- advice before basic training- I wrote him letters starting the day he left. It made it easier for me to cope, I carried around a notebook all day so when I felt like I wanted to talk to him, I would just write. Once I finally got his address I was able to mail them. Getting letters from him were the best thing in the world. Good luck to you and your boyfriend💖

    • @nicolediamond391
      @nicolediamond391 Před 5 lety +3

      Fellow Marine girlfriend here. As with the other comments, boot camp is very hard because there are no phones, just letters. After boot camp though, you will have those 10 days to catch up and spend quality time together until he leaves for MCT. I'll give you some heads up ahead of time so you can prepare and since I'm already 6 months into MOS School phase. In MCT, my boyfriend didn't get his phone until Saturday and then he had to turn it in on Sunday night, at least that's how MCT West Coast does it (if your boyfriend has Verizon and is going to Camp Pendleton, communication is hard lo since the Verizon tower got hit by an artillery shell according to Pendleton 😂). Another heads up, MCT graduation is not very exciting since they literally leave for their MOS school location like an hour later (my boyfriend actually told me not to go because he thought it wasn't worth it 😂), but that's your choice. Other than that though, communication for me and my boyfriend at MOS school is daily, he doesn't text me till like 1700-1800 because of work, but we text everyday and FaceTime on the weekends no problem. With the deploy,net conversations, if for some reason you cannot answer the phone, I'm sure your boyfriend would understand. He knows that you also have stuff to focus on whether its school or work, so I think he would be understanding. Best of luck to you and if you need anything else, feel free to ask :) 🇺🇸

    • @princesschi7689
      @princesschi7689 Před 5 lety

      Why are so many going to marine

  • @tayloreast4549
    @tayloreast4549 Před 4 lety

    Amen to being re-triggered every time. Every. Single. Time.

  • @victoriaboveto9799
    @victoriaboveto9799 Před 5 lety

    I’m new to this channel and I’m wondering from the comments I read.. why is your husband leaving the military? And what is he going to do in place of the military?

  • @douglassmith9445
    @douglassmith9445 Před 4 lety

    You are really beautiful ❤

  • @bawonituntun6368
    @bawonituntun6368 Před 5 lety

    I thought he was out of military already?

    • @BritCon2
      @BritCon2  Před 5 lety

      Bawoni Tuntun Not yet! He gets out in November.