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Did he want revenge? | Talks with Tony
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- čas přidán 20. 12. 2020
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When you have a right mind to leave a man don't let your left mind send you back ... Noted
I could not have said that any better myself.
Quote of the century!💯
never pick up garbage you put down
Are you a philosopher??? That was very deep-ly!!! I love it
@@kishoflife that's what Tony said in his message I just quoted him he's the goat 🐐 lol 🤣
A man’s ego is more vulnerable than their heart!
Wow
Never take a man back! When you don’t sleep with a guy/men you are always the winner!
You right ✅
You want: clarity , answers, solutions, atonement, closure He wants: REVENGE You want to settle things out like adults He wants: REVENGE Go on about your business!!
Don’t break up with a Man unless you’re 100% certain that you are done and are ok with never speaking with him again. If you reach out in the future they will just rage back at you. Then you’ll really feel hurt.
My mom said the same thing before I left my ex, I wasn’t ready but I honestly don’t know if I’d be here if I continued on with him any further.
Story of my life 💯
Another key lesson, stay off ya back. Wait a year and you will see his true colors if he isn’t your husband or is. Staying off ya back will give you clarity while getting to know who he is.
Sista you dodged a bullet..don't worry about him being engaged he is the new woman's problem.
"He's someone else problem" 💯....some females don't even realize this bc they THINK they're so "in love." 🤦🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🥴
Learn to cut them off EARLY.
You see the signs here and there, actions not matching words, close the chapter.
No second chances.
One strike and you're out.
I have dealt with a grown man who was actually a grown boy in disguise. He would like to debate with me most of the time. It felt like he was belittling me; which he was. He would laugh and tell me that he was just playing. I eventually called him out on his behavior. He got so offended. He knew he was a narcissist, and he saw that I knew it also. I blocked him and almost six months later; he contacted me via another number because he knew his number was blocked. He said he wanted to win my heart, and get married. Pulling the "your my wife card". Grown boy if I was your wife, why did you treat me so bad? I told him to never contact me again. I blocked his new number too. In my big bro Tony voice BLOCKED.
Oh wow! My one contacted me after 6 months too… asking to get back together and then ignoring me… not texting back for 6hrs LOL
That's why the bible says to wait until marriage to have sex. Plus Mr. Tony says stay off your back. Then the man is limited to his revenge. It's for our protection.
She was very fortunate to have learned a lesson that only involved herself. A lot of women have lost kids and family members due to a vengeful man. She was fortunate that he went on about his business and didn't physically harm her or her family.
Grown Boy mentality shocked by a confident woman who
knows her worth. Cannot tolerate the disrespect .
I can SHOW YOU better than I can TELL YOU.
Whew! Tony just described my marriage and all seven times we tried to make it work after getting divorced. Yes, I said seven. Like walking around the walls of Jericho. After the last break up, I shouted out to God and the walls came tumbling down. I left and never looked back. Knowing he was a "grown boy", I continued to try to be a "good wife" and wait on my husband to grow up. 20 years after our wedding date, he's still in the same place mentally, emotionally, and spiritually while I have moved on with my life by the grace of God. I finally let go of the guilt of a failed marriage and I am finally learning how to love myself.
Thank you for your testimony it was very helpful. Make God continue to bless your efforts. Keep healing and loving yourself.
Sounds familiar my Sista. God bless u. 💜
God bless you 🙏🏽
Thank you for Sharing your testimony sis. It's definitely encouraging to us in a marriage thats only one-sided.
@@unapologeticallyauthentic2428 Thank you
It's a blessing that she's not with him. I just broke up with someone like this. He was 10 years my senior, and he would always downplay my thoughts and opinions. He was intimidated by the fact that he couldn't "teach" me anything. He felt some kind of way about me being on the same level as him when it came to our careers. Our relationship really went bad once I began to excel past him. He would do things like flirt with other females in front of me and then resort to gaslighting me every time I confronted him about it. I ghosted him and never looked back. A man that childish deserves to be left in time out. Girl, move on. There are men out there that will adore you for the type of woman you are.
Oh !! They don't like that, lol. They expect to mold you into what they want.
@@fah232 I hope that’s not what he thought. Lol
@@christina9238 During the many arguments that we had, I told him that I would leave if his behavior didn't change. He's a grown man. I'm sure he knew it was coming. Also, I knew that if I told him it would turn into another one of our ”great debates”.
@@iambeloved8109 Unfortunately that's what some of them think. I'm glad you're out, and I had my turn also and got away from that.
I think my ex was put off by me not being impressed with his 'intelligence'...he would put down other men who were truly more academically astute, showing his lack..he got with a younger woman who was more " street" smart than book smart, she has a mouth ( and a list of court appearances) on her (more his level, I guess)
“This ain’t a loss; it’s a lesson.” TG
"I met a distraction that looks like destiny"... ~TG
This is so real.
Wheew
Deep!
Lord have mercy...that’s my truth. Stuck it out for 9 years.
Theeee Truth!! Whew na!
Can't wait to get the BLOCKED ❌ t-shirt! Makes me laugh so much when Tony says that 😂😂
Yes!!! That's the Shirt!!
I looked for the shirts! There was only two to choose from? Was I looking in the wrong place?
I know one thing, y’all better have that grammar together writing Tony! 😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂💯❤
😂😂😂😂😂 yes lol
😆😂😂😂
I love how hyped Tony is about this letter being typed correctly! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Tony is not lying... I have stayed single for years because of the 80% grown boy population and not realising the work I needed to do on myself.
Right!!
You’re probably being generous with the 80% too😂
Dating 40 + year old grown boys out here!!
Mr. Gaskins, you really broke it down. I will never entertain another grown boy for the rest of my life. And ladies, lets stop bringing the trash BACK in the house, ok. lol
Amen! I strongly agree.
You know.....
Agreed
U ain’t never lying about a woman breaking up with a man. I’m speaking from experience. No matter if you (the woman) is in the wrong or not NEVER call text or try to work it out. NEVER! Even if he does come back , he’ll just mess up again and you’ll be wasting MORE time. Unless like Tony said: u SEE CONSISTENT changed behavior. After 4 years of an on and off TOXIC relationship, No kids no marriage I finally walked away for good. This man was so bitter by that time that he damaged my car even tho he was paying the car note. How backwards is that lol. He even tried to date a girl younger than me. Mind u he was already in his 30s. So freakin immature. It’s been over a year now, I’m still in my 20s and I’m so so so grateful to not be with him. He’s been blocked an entire year plus more. I don’t take EXs back. He had good qualities but I was the BETTER half.
Be blessed ❤️
You are a WHOLE woman. A wife and a helpmate, you already are. You bring favour & blessings to a man”s life. When he covers you, it’s represents how GOD covers man. With love, protection, prayer, mercy, kindness and more love. Because of that, GOD blesses a man when he has you.
Before Adam even named EVE, Adam said out loud before GOD....Whoa- Man. There is nothing half about that.
Lol, I teach elementary school remotely, and I want to tell my students the same thing! “Stop noticing and commenting on irrelevant things and get this lesson!” 🤣
If your Right mind tells you to leave; don’t let your Left mind send you back....Amen
The 2 boyfriends I've had were this way. Smart and confident but thought they were smart beyond question. I elevated them so high and was enamored, like Tony describes. If I questioned them I would get immediately shut down and made to feel like a silly school girl. "Just shut up and let me teach you" was the attitude. Now I'm looking for a man who is smart but has a quiet, humble confidence. They must respect and value my mind.
💯 ‼️
That's growth 🙌🏿
OMG, I’ve dated this type of guy. That’s how I found Tony. I started standing up for myself, and he ghosted me! Young lady in the email, just do the work, and you’ll heal. It’s been almost a year for me😃. I am So Grateful the Lord removed me from that situation. I can’t imagine having to spend the rest of my life with that man (grown boy) - draining AND depressing. Lord, I Thank You!🙏
@@lsmith6718 After seeing the pattern I can see how my insecurities were used against me and that if I shore up those weaknesses, those people wont be able to break me down, or even get close enough to try. 😊
Yessss!!!
Women in the comment section...please stop knitpicking everything about Mr. Gaskins videos. Just be glad and thankful he teaching you things your father figures should have taught regarding men and their behaviors. I said what I said.
if this doesn't apply to you....ignore.
I can totally identify with this email. An ex-boyfriend of 32 years ago reappeared in my life, wantng us to rekindle what we had. Well considering that I was the one that broke it off before, I thought maybe he had matured and we could try it again. Boy was I wrong. After 30 days I blocked him twice, the second time was the final time. I found myself just like this email always being on the defense of my opinions and my feelings. He always downplayed what I said, pushed me off as if I meant nothing, and he acted as if he really didn't want to be bothered with me. I expressed this to him the first time it happened, and he acted like "oh I wasn't aware I was doing that, please forgive me". So I thought it would have gotten better and that he would have changed, in his approach towards me and he didn't. The second and the last time that it happened I expressed my concerns again and I proceeded to block him on every means necessary and I have not spoken to him again, because one thing I will not do and that is go back and forth when I have already addressed and expressed the issue once before. We are adults, not children.
I had almost the exact same thing just happen to me. I definitely learned that ex’s are ex’s for a reason no matter how much time has passed since the breakup.
I've been through the same thing as well.
32 years ago ..you shoudve not even entertain him..if you dump a guy and he come back sometimes they come back to to run you thru the ringer then dump yoiu ..do not redate someone they knew what to do the first time but they forgot.
Wow 32 years!? I guess it’s true ,they always come back
I had a feeling when my ex deployed to break up with him because I wasn't feeling like myself. He cried to me to take him back and my left mind said okay .... and in his deployment he broke up with me and it was just a horrible break up and bad timing of a family member death and he was aware of it. Lesson Learned, I walked away and I have never looked back. I'm 24 learning how to read men to protect myself and grow :)
I’m so glad to know that you’re growing from that! My ex boyfriend was also deployed and had broken up with me over text last year, so I can understand some of your pain during the breakup. You got this girl!
Never give in to a crying man, its fake tears.
@@disnalee Okay
A man who challenges your every word or thought is the ultimate turnoff. (For me)
Yeah it’s a form of gaslighting...when I see this I run. People with major insecurities do this and some people are so broken down by life and have superior complexes that there not even aware that there doing it because they literally believe that their thoughts are always supreme and everyone else is beneath them... this is how they make themselves feel good about themselves by lowering others. Men as well as woman suffer from this and they are not safe people.
Yup. That's what a three year old does.
Maaaaan I left him after a year, i was still a virgin,....long story short...I came back, lost my virginity, and Lord knows....the next 5 years of my life was built creating soul ties that took me another 10 years to break!!!!!
If you walk away, stay away!!!!🗣🗣🗣🗣💕💕💕💕💎💎💎💎
I’m glad you got over it!!
I would be a liar if I accepted this credit. This year is the first year I've gone an entire year without speaking to him, since meeting him in 2006. Definitely not over it but I'm not where I used to be 🙌🏾🙏🏽💯❤️
8 out of 10 men you meet are grown boys.
It takes a strong woman to take care of her business, her life, child's life, a job, paying all her own bills.....living a good life for her and her child, or children.
Dont ever settle for less than you can do alone. There are so many men out there that are players and you are wise, and you know the difference and don't settle for less.
Dont succumb to a grown boy. Trust your intuition, always.
A grown boy cant accelerate to the level you are at, no matter how much they try. Walk on by girlfriend.
You deserve so much better! Love yourself wholeheartedly
Amen Sis! Beautifully said.
This is so entertaining but soooooo important!!! So nice to hear a man validate my suspicion about men paying you back and endlessly getting revenge.
2021 is my year! I enrolled.
Yayyyyyy 🎉
I did too!!! Can’t wait!!!
It's a couple more days until a New Year. I'll take heed to Tony G's advice. I have made many mistakes and have been deceived and mislead by 'grown boys'. It seems that these feminine, immature men are in the majority.
I'm starting by working on my body, brain and brand. I've wasted too many good years entertaining and supporting losers. I'm loosing the extra weight, shaping my body, learning a new language, and having a new source of income from an Etsy store.
I'm not looking back at trash or putting hope in the potential of a grown boy. Thanks Tony G. Merry Christmas to the wonderful ladies in the channel too.
Merry Christmas and Happy New year to you! 🙌🙏🏻🎄
So happy for you taking care of yourself. We all need to do that, but you're doing it
Happy Holidays! What is the name of your store on Etsy?
Amen sis ! And the best of luck to you ❤️
Yesss ❤️ your message. Merry Christmas to you too.
Yes, his ego was insulted.
He did not ask you sis, YOU asked him SEVERAL times. Thank you for sharing, now that we know better, we will do better.
Yes I agree we as women need to make a change and stop putting up with bad behavior. We have to stop wasting time on people who dont love us and work on ourselves.
tony enamored by the grammar skills lmao
I mean really!! 😂😂 And he read the punctuation aloud! 😂😆 Hilarious! 😂
It tickled me😂🤣🤣!!
I swear, he has me cracking up!
While I totally understand and agree with everything Tony is saying, I bet you some time later he reach out to her again. That's just how grown boys are. Always on the comeback trail.
They never go away
😂😂😂😂😂 When Tony gives his vocabulary lessons. Oooh... the way I holler every time!!!
Tony be killing me with the weave jokes 😂
Wow Tony, you said it how it I.S ISSS! Left my ex husband while i was pregnant in januari 2020, and next monday he is getting married. He even proposed to his gf while i was pregnant. And now our baby is 3months old and he getting married next week. He aint got his life together. Not paying childsuport, waiting on the judge to decide the visitation rights etc.. so it makes 100% sense that this is a revenge act. Cause he out and about in the luxury stores buying all the stuff for his new wife but wont even buy a box of milk for our 2nd daughter.. good riddens🗣😫
Wow! This is crazy. I don’t understand woman like that. You have to be crazy and desperate to marry a man after days/month. Your ex husband is using her as rebound, and he is a loser. Thank god you dumped him!
Lol girl, sounds like my children's father. But it is what it is. Y'all be blessed with that petty marriage 😂😂
@@eupiaeupia2647 Not just that but how can a woman want to marry a man seeing and knowing how he treated her ? Unless she totally in the dark someway about his situation with her. What he did to her he will do to his current gf. A pattern..
When Tony G. talks about men, I think of an old, children's fable called a "Dog and the bone". The dog had the bone in it's mouth, but looking down at the water. The dog kept salivating and wishing for the other dog (it's own reflection) bone. I'm not a man. I will never understand men, but listening to Tony G and having that fable in mind helps me to understand them better.
It seems that most men are on a constant search for something that's better. They're never satisfied with securing what they already have, or how best they are going to make use of their resources. I need to approach a man with that concept and the term "grown boy" until he proves different.
Right. Instead of becoming something better. This was a good analogy
Oh! Oh! That hurts! And ive know these things about most of the men Ive encountered, even the one or True loves. Myfather tried to tell me. "Do not trust anyone. Not even me." He said 3 months before he past. Even the Good ones, must be denied The Golden Rule until is Proven. If Christ had not been a man,Lord Lird!! Your Mercy! Please.
🎙🎙🎙
@ Rose-Ann Woodsley That’s deep...I remember that fable and the moral of the story was if you are greedy you may lose everything!!!...I love your mind sis!!!😇
I know Tony is joking, but there are some of us ladies who have University Degrees, good at grammar and who knows some Latin words 😭😭😂😂
Thank you for paying homage to my latin culture because ion know a lick of latin.😂
🤣 True! He is too funny and his antics tickle me! When you said we know some Latin, I hollered! Tell it!
Great advice overall but aren't the extra waxy vocabulary breakdowns a tad condescending much?? It's truly distracting from the reality of these grown boy lessons.
@@alego8072 we're all human and sometimes we can say something that might come off the wrong way depending on the audience. But I highly doubt he did it from a place of bad intention. If I were you I would use what applies to me let the rest fly. If he was truly condescending he wouldn't being try to help. A truly condescending person is arrogant.
@@roja_xo5527 ahaha!! 😆😂
“He’s butt hurt and don’t got no preparation H”lmfaooo alright I’m done !! 🤣🤣🤣
I can't believe the amount of grown boys in the world. I am with a "man" who is 55 and I'm 62 and he is fascinating! The maturity of this man astonishes me.
guys in the age range love to play games too and you are almost at retirement age he trying to get locked in ...so watch him
@YV-HE W 🤣🤣 you weren't playing with your response!!!!
@@LoveAlways1002 listen lol..I have been around older people that put me on to game lol ..dont assume because someone is older they are blessed the devil gives blessings too...always listen to intuition if you do you can never play myself..doing this had helped me avoid a lot in my 35 yrs of life and having boundaries with people that I dont change..
Tony giving us Miriam-Webster tonight 😂😂😂🙌🏾
Word of the night: Comma 😂😂😂😂
Getting that last lick is right, such nefarious energy. Just recently learned that.
My experience with my grown boy/spouse was very intimidated by me expressing myself as the woman you're speaking about. I recognized the attitude and felt him pulling away!! He wanted to be the bible on every subject! Debated everything!! Needed constant validation and attention. Said you think you a boss! Never celebrated my accomplishments; But immediately when it's about him! Fireworks, it's a national holiday! All eyes on him!! Grown boy bye! I put him out and he's being the same liar asking can he come back!! Haven't done any work; nor consistent about reaching out or proving himself he's worthy of anymore of time!!!!
Hey Ladies...What Tony said is true about a man coming back to you for revenge. I’ve heard my uncles talk about this, so I know Tony is on point about this. Once gone...Stay gone.🏃🏿♀️
Every time Tony says "comma" "semicolon" "period," this is me 🤣🤣🤣 periodt
Please listen to Tony because this happened to me. I left this thing the first time because all we did was argue then I took him back and it was 10x worst he even stole from me and I knew it was revenge for leaving even after I told him that I went to counseling to work on myself please guard your heart and get to know people well before and stay off your back lol vet these wolves in sheep clothing
"When you have the RIGHT mind to leave a man, don't let your LEFT mind bring you back!" - TG ⚠️
I’m here in the uk 🇬🇧 waiting up at 1am in the morning 🙌
Me too!! 😃🇬🇧
Thank you 🙏🏾 ladies for supporting.
@@Glamrocs thanks gorgeous 😃💖
@@MichElle-py8lk I will forever love your hair 😍 and your welcome!
@@Glamrocs I subscribed to your channel and I look forward to your make up tips.
I always say, it's like putting a box of stale cereal on top of the refrigerator and thinking they'll be fresh next week.
Excellent
I love it ❤️
☠️☠️☠️😂😂😂
1)Showed me his research papers ,telling me that he 'skipped a grade' because he was too smart, and telling me that his old boss is always begging him to come back , on the third date.
2) Told me his salary without me even asking for it ( or anything related to it on the fourth date)
3) trying to be cool by sharing the most irrelevant news and captioning it with being 'ashamed of his nationality' .
4) saying- 'you will earn more money than me' cynically on the 5th date
5) repeatedly saying 'WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU AND YOU MUST BE SO SAD' when I dumped him , when he tried to bench me to the side hoe position.
OMG!!!!! I DODGED A HUGE BULLET
What in the world?!? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@indyTyson He also shamed me for my language skills. According to him, conversation with me would 'worsen' his English -_____- . ( He is NOT a native english speaker, and no one except him speaks english in his family, and he spells STUFF as 'STUFFS')
@@ishanasweetncool Wow!! 🤣🤣🤣 Definitely dodged a bullet on that one cuz he sounds delusional girl!!
When he said every now n then I can tell your track showing. I almost fell out my seat...Toni wild..
😂😂😂😂😂
😩😩😂😂😂
Straight revengeful action by a grown boy.
I just joined the Blessed Tribe 🥰
Tony know his stuff.....I was married and being treated worse than a dog...I left for a year....allowed my Church to guilt me into trying again and he was 10x's worse.....don't everrrrrr go back....its a song about this "🎶We are never ever getting back together" 🎶 Taylor Swift 😁
Omg this is crazy my ex loved to debate about everything . I don’t think he ever got over his ex. Thank you lord for Tony !
I just love it when someone think I suppose to have insecurities, particularly ( my weight) being that is such a big stigma on not being skin and bones. Also I'm getting older I'll be 45 soon, so now you got ( some men) that think you should be desperate about that also. But surprisingly they found out quick I'm not the one, the two or the three lol. I know I'm not perfect but I also love myself. Tony I been watching you for years and you have been my little big brother lol with all your great wisdom. 💖💖💖
When he took his book out, I lost it 🤣😂🤣😂 Tony you is too funny with the side acting. We need more teachers like this.👍
You crack me up with the ‘look at you w my good eye’ 😂😂😂 “every now and then you got a lil track showing” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 a mess 😂😂
Something similar just happened to me. The only difference is, the break-up was mutual and I walked away and didn’t look back after this last time. It had been close to a year into the breakup, and all of a sudden one day, I receive a friend request from him on fb, which I know now I should’ve declined. Well to make a long story short, that’s how I found out that he was engaged. Recent pics and all of him down on one knee proposing to this girl. Super petty of him, especially since I had gone on with my life, and not reached out to him at all. Oh well, that’s how the cookie crumbles, and life goes on.💔
Ego indeed - God bless you
How happy can he be if he’s still trying to make you miserable....
Nijael...exactly!!
@@TheBabyface716 🎯
Ego. BIG ego! Thank god you dogged a bullet!
I admit that I got caught up in a similar situationship & now, I’m single again. But, it’s okay, I take that as a learning lesson & moved on.
This video was on point! I definitely agree that 8 out of 10 men are grown boys because I’ve dealt with too many of them! Loving your videos, Tony.
😭😭😭😭
🤣 never in my life did I find a channel that gives me so much knowledge to win at life and entertain me at the same time! I got to the end of the video (and I learnt alot) so lemme say Be Blessed.
This was a good video! Sadly I’m dealing with a grown boy. Such a headache.
Don’t waste your youth on a man who isn’t showing genuine love and adoration. It will get worse as you age.
Don't believe I'm leaving? COUNT the days I'm gone.
Larry Graham's song,
"You Don,'t Miss Your Water Until Your Well Runs Dry."
Tony is on point with this one. I was in a relationship just like this, but didn't have a child and going to school for my degree. It's when I decided to further my education is when I saw the change in behavior, and his neediness to debate and pick at everything I do.
One thing for certain , we gone get a laugh and good knowledge every video !
I’m cracking up about the lady having a broad vernacular and proper grammar!This is so me, if I were to write in.🤣 My friends say I think I’m an English teacher. Hahaha
Tony you have NO idea how much entertainment you provide😂 I literally look forward to your daily videos like I did watching the “I Love Lucy show” but unlike Lucy, watching you, we are Blessed with wisdom AND knowledge as well. You are undeniably operating in your purpose and you truly give me so much joy as I am learning!💕
Love your comment
Good evening family from Las Vegas ❤️💖 Happy Holidays to all .
Happy Holidays! 🙌🙏🏻🎄
Happy Holidays
Happy Holidays
Thank you I wish the same to you and your loved ones.
Sis with all due respect, sounds like your desperate. The man your dealing with know it. You want to go back to him and dumb down to keep him. Sis please buy and read A WOMAN'S INFLUENCE. Sis this man does not determine your worth. God Bless you!!!
I've been single for years because there are too many grown boys out here . I see the signs early now but sometimes I wonder if I'm too alert and it's keeping me from giving anyone a chance. Then I listen to Tony and know I'm on the right track
I’m amazed at how you describe these men down to a T without personally knowing them. It blows my mind every time at how good you are at this. It’s incredible. ⚡️
Your messages come in at the right time, always! Thank you 🙏🏼
Thank you so much for this video, Tony. It was much needed.
Not she was the bachelor party 😭
Ready for you Brother Tony!! Be Blessed!
Tony is naturally hilarious 😂
Got me hollering over here!! Thank you for the laughs AND great advice.
Thank you Tony!! It was real refreshing to hear these advices, we all need support! Thank you again❤
Thanks again, Tony! May God continue to bless ur wife n kids. 🙏🏽
Thank you Mr. Tony. Excellent video!
Thank you so much for sharing, be blessed!
Thank you Tony, I always enjoy your Talks. You are such a blessing. May you and your family have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
This was so entertaining and instructive at the same time! Made my day!
So excited to actually catch a live!
Teach it Tony!!. I almost miss this episode tonight!!. LOL. THE track showing. I am hollering!! 😂😂😂
It wasn't a Loss but a Lesson...... Let that sink in..... Thank you Mr. Tony Gaskins!!
😂😂😂 this is why I have no problem watching your videos till the end! Comical!
I really needed this video, thank you.
Enjoy the lesson as usual thanks Tony!!!!
Excellent break down as usual Tony! This, like so many other videos, really resonated with me.
Tony, sincerely, thank you for existing!!!
Damn, this one hit home, thankyou Tony.
Story of my life, too.