The Rejection Experiment | Guy Winch | Goalcast

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  • čas přidán 17. 01. 2019
  • Author and Psychologist Guy Winch takes us through the psychological experiment that illustrates why rejection hurts us so badly, and the steps we can take to heal our wounds through emotional first aid.
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Komentáře • 88

  • @goalcast
    @goalcast  Před 5 lety +8

    Watch the newest Goalcast videos here: bit.ly/2IAVSll
    And don't forget to subscribe: bit.ly/2hmFY3i

  • @Zarghami
    @Zarghami Před 5 lety +139

    We have all been rejected, it’s important to know that not everyone is gonna love you and they dont have to.

    • @spineandbones2561
      @spineandbones2561 Před 5 lety +4

      Nice.

    • @rail7646
      @rail7646 Před 4 lety +14

      they don't have to is kinda negative. Ofc they don't have to but actually no one have to do anything then dying after beeing born, actually when I'm reading your comment I'm more thrown back than forward, even if it's a obvious fact.

  • @HugDealer
    @HugDealer Před 5 lety +36

    I read his book "Emotional First Aid". Fantastic book. He is absolutely awesome. Not only the concepts but also the wording. Really helps in so many different situations

    • @ForzaTerra89
      @ForzaTerra89 Před 2 lety

      Is there actual practical advice in the book and not just theory

  • @dr.harinigajendran5086
    @dr.harinigajendran5086 Před 3 lety +13

    I just came here after my rejection in love. I was really in pain that I thought death could be better. But ya I had great frnds who were so supporting reminded me how positive I was and helped me move on. I think a better way to move on any rejection is learning something new like play ING a instrument.....Hay you reading this no worries pains are temporary u have a happy and joyful moment to exp get ready for it!!! Happy life😊

  • @The_Original_Man
    @The_Original_Man Před 4 lety +96

    If you ever feel bad about ur rejection always remember I got turned down by a Popeyes chicken worker

    • @tommymarco9988
      @tommymarco9988 Před 4 lety +6

      That actually helped

    • @waydebaker33
      @waydebaker33 Před 4 lety +2

      You just should have came at me differently. My hands were full of chicken sandwiches and there were people fighting in the lobby. I'm sorry. It gets real up in here.

    • @flowingfeminine1885
      @flowingfeminine1885 Před 4 lety +2

      🥴
      I got rejected by a writing partner and I've been crying for 2 days LOL

    • @mikek5089
      @mikek5089 Před 3 lety +1

      I got rejected by a waitress at Applebee’s once. Didn’t wanna take a ride on my motorcycle. Lol

    • @katestarmans7029
      @katestarmans7029 Před 3 lety +4

      😂😂 you made me laugh, thank you 🥺😊❤️

  • @Atlanta718
    @Atlanta718 Před 5 lety +44

    Increase your self worth after rejection.
    1. 5 qualities we like about ourselves
    2. Essay about these qualities

  • @sarak7855
    @sarak7855 Před 2 lety +2

    Thank you God for this video I was lost helpless and hurting. This gives me hope

  • @NinjaDevilManiac
    @NinjaDevilManiac Před 5 lety +11

    Understand rejection hurts, one of the biggest diseases is people not being loved. Yep you have a right to reject people but you don't have the right to be free from judgement and repercussion. I believe we should encourage Society to social acceptance. I know people kill themselves from being lonely. There are very judgemental people in this world. Social isolation is a huge problem in men and many people are very blind to this. It will never hurt people to be kind.

  • @PracticalInspiration
    @PracticalInspiration Před 5 lety +25

    *Brilliant. To simply think of an self affirmation isn't the same as truly understanding why that affirmation is true. Rejection is hard to deal with, but affirmations helps build back confidence in the hard times*

  • @admypagame
    @admypagame Před 5 lety +44

    We have to learn and understand not to fear disapproval or rejection; we can't always please everybody, not everybody will like us, not everybody will like our ideas, not everybody will think like us... but you know what? That is OK.

    • @robinbutler4515
      @robinbutler4515 Před 5 lety +1

      admypagame well said! 👍

    • @miif9175
      @miif9175 Před 3 lety +1

      What if nobody likes you?

    • @admypagame
      @admypagame Před 3 lety

      @@miif9175 Try to shake off that belief that nobody likes you. I am sure somebody likes you. At the same time you probably don't like everybody either. Remember, you can't always please everybody and that is OK. You can live a great and fulfilling life even if some people don't like you.

    • @miif9175
      @miif9175 Před 3 lety

      @@admypagame just find it strange howsomeone can get rejected so many times

    • @admypagame
      @admypagame Před 3 lety

      @@miif9175 It happens sometimes, you just have to learn from your past experiences, adjust your approach and stop thinking that you will be rejected when a new opportunity arises. I found this video to be interesting, I hope it helps - czcams.com/video/-vZXgApsPCQ/video.html

  • @herkhiles
    @herkhiles Před 5 lety +7

    Wow this was really good! Interesting how the affirmations don’t work since they are outside of the belief system. Great video!

  • @HumansOfVR
    @HumansOfVR Před 5 lety +9

    Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection

  • @test5421as
    @test5421as Před 4 lety

    Wonderful information - thank you!

  • @sabrinaqueirozdecarvalho6240

    I actually did the full exercise and it really works :)

  • @user-sv5md3nw7d
    @user-sv5md3nw7d Před 5 lety

    Thank you so much for this video!!!
    Now I understand why all the "regular"affirmations just doesn't works!!!!
    Thank you, again! 💞

  • @danbrown6597
    @danbrown6597 Před 5 lety

    Truthfully, this does help me a lot

  • @Lazarusrizing
    @Lazarusrizing Před 5 lety +5

    Interesting. But I was particularly interested in a substantial finding to heal and treat these wounds. I was disappointed that he didn't talk about that.

  • @AnnaBTsatokeEmpress
    @AnnaBTsatokeEmpress Před 5 lety

    Thank you so much...finally understanding

  • @wixielane8513
    @wixielane8513 Před 3 lety

    This was beautiful

  • @Shamsazadshaikh
    @Shamsazadshaikh Před 5 lety

    Goodone, Loved It

  • @NickiTedesco
    @NickiTedesco Před 2 lety

    So good!

  • @bryanfidelman3846
    @bryanfidelman3846 Před 4 lety

    I’ll try this out, sounds like a good idea

  • @j.leonardo260
    @j.leonardo260 Před 3 lety

    Im gonna try this!

  • @MultiSignlanguage
    @MultiSignlanguage Před 3 lety

    That’s intriguing. I think I’ll try that.

  • @zakisyed4814
    @zakisyed4814 Před 5 lety

    Good work

  • @aditipaul2906
    @aditipaul2906 Před 5 lety

    I just wish there were more videos available by guy winch sir on youtube

  • @gawaisukeshani8303
    @gawaisukeshani8303 Před 4 lety

    Thank you sir

  • @kta0702
    @kta0702 Před 3 lety

    I love this

  • @CriticalGamingYT143
    @CriticalGamingYT143 Před 5 lety

    Positive mental attitude

  • @richardlee8899
    @richardlee8899 Před 5 lety +5

    But the thing is when you know you have one of the “awesome” quality, later on, someone has the same quality as you but better, you become even worse than what you started with. It’s still missing the piece of action, what are you going to do with the things that you have.

  • @unleashingpotential-psycho9433

    Rejection hurts but I think the best thing to do is to reject your rejection.

  • @FreeFlow__
    @FreeFlow__ Před 4 lety +2

    The core lies in the belief to be a separate and limited self

  • @fredyrodriguez5567
    @fredyrodriguez5567 Před 5 lety +5

    We tend to become mentally strong as we are rejected.

    • @spivak4342
      @spivak4342 Před 5 lety +6

      No, it is how you deal with it that decides whether it makes you strong or weak

    • @tovaris09
      @tovaris09 Před 5 lety +3

      You will not be either stron nor weak, but you will have experience. If Guy Winch says that emotional pain affect the same regions of brain that means you have the same trauma like physichal pain. It is all about how to cope with it and recover so youd do not damage yourself baddly.

  • @nqobazibuko
    @nqobazibuko Před 5 lety +2

    Rejection can be a useful tool but it all depends on how we see it. We encounter different things in life, but how you respond to it is more important than it.

  • @gen.aladeenhandsome3101
    @gen.aladeenhandsome3101 Před 5 lety +3

    I heard Many Stories of People Being Rejected. Specially.. In Relationships. You know.. After Made a Huge Amount of Effort to a Someone To please her to Love you back.. But in The End. She Will Say.. "Sorry Better luck Next Time" . It's hurt.. It's like a Knife Stabbing 10 times. That's why many People just like me.That never try to love Again. And start listening Slipknot "Psychosocial " 😁 🤘 be happy even you're Iike.. A "Corpse" .💀

  • @longonponce
    @longonponce Před 3 lety +1

    My wife been rejecting me for 2 years........physical, mentally and emotionally.............shit hurts..........especially when I was the one that kept trying to make her feel love

  • @johnsonkhangjrakpam9312
    @johnsonkhangjrakpam9312 Před 5 lety +6

    I want subtitles goalcast

  • @reptilian5212
    @reptilian5212 Před 2 lety +3

    Thats it im packing Tylenol

  • @sarak7855
    @sarak7855 Před 2 lety

    3:10 stuffing my face w banana bread while he said that

  • @jessicapinto3817
    @jessicapinto3817 Před 4 lety +1

    I'm trying to listen but the music is a little loud, can you reupload with the music a little softer?

  • @danielyusupov7585
    @danielyusupov7585 Před 4 lety

    Do you write that essay before you get rejected? Like are you always supposed to have it in your pocket?

  • @BadassBikerOwns
    @BadassBikerOwns Před 4 lety +3

    But I stay away from society because I don't want to get rejected. I reject them before they do me. How is this an evolutionary trait?

  • @ahigherbranch
    @ahigherbranch Před 5 lety

    Great highlights of Dr Guy Winch in great form, thank you Goalcast. Dr Winch recently spoke at our inaugural event in Sydney Australia and he had the crowd spellbound with his brand of psychology. He also made us laugh a lot, (not many people know that he was once a stand-up comic!) He delivered two talks. One on emotional hygiene and the other on managing conflicts in relationships. Very practical. If only all psychologists communicated like him. Here is a link to the highlights: czcams.com/video/QGNaEUZKMy0/video.html
    Its not as good as your videos but captures some of the essence. Goalcast, please let us know if you would like more footage of both talks. Cheers

  • @LunarShuriken1
    @LunarShuriken1 Před 5 lety

    What if other people don't see those same qualities as a high if value as you do though?

  • @NTLFarm
    @NTLFarm Před 5 lety

    hahahahahahaha that pixie music really suits this video. looks and sounds like a little pixie running round a stage.

  • @janjenkinson1829
    @janjenkinson1829 Před 5 lety +1

    Wish no music very distracting to a worthy talk

  • @Mani_Matter
    @Mani_Matter Před 5 lety +1

    Letzter

  • @SS-hj7xl
    @SS-hj7xl Před 2 lety

    Love it but pls, for someone w brain injury and tinnitus, background music, especially at a competing level, is painful to listen to at worse and over taxing on concentration and hearing at best. That aside, love the content! Thank you!!!

  • @tuffyorkie
    @tuffyorkie Před 3 lety

    I wish the background music was removed this is a very good video but hard to concentrate on what’s being said .

  • @zworldview5624
    @zworldview5624 Před 4 lety

    Isn't awareness of true ourselves through non-judgmental observation to avoid shallow-improvident solution, and otherwise won't self-deception bring more suffering?

  • @Mani_Matter
    @Mani_Matter Před 5 lety +4

    Everyone should be rejected as much as possible

  • @royalkoblin8bootgang653

    I think lifting helps honestly

  • @simppolice9363
    @simppolice9363 Před 5 lety +2

    What is rejaculation💀

  • @apheleletapile1282
    @apheleletapile1282 Před 3 lety

    Why this music??

  • @fivezeroniner
    @fivezeroniner Před 5 lety +1

    i disagree... affirmation WORKS.. but you need to do it daily and consistently... ITS NOT JUST A ONE TIME THING!!

  • @MDimov-jm4pi
    @MDimov-jm4pi Před 5 lety

    you should be selfish enaugh to dont care best solution

  • @EdwardGFunk
    @EdwardGFunk Před 5 lety

    the music is off-putting. it's not in sync with what the doctor is trying to explain...

  • @michaelfrederic7531
    @michaelfrederic7531 Před 5 lety +1

    3:13 Wtf bruh :/

  • @justanotherview3243
    @justanotherview3243 Před 3 lety +1

    I hate the background music in your videos

  • @s.f6851
    @s.f6851 Před 5 lety +1

    Why did I read it religion not rejection LMAO

  • @missnataliedavis
    @missnataliedavis Před 2 lety +1

    You could be the juiciest ripest 🍑 peach, and there is still going to be someone who just doesn't like peaches. ❣️ Hang in there folks! Nothing lasts forever even our problems. It's all going to be good!