How much does the average man have in common with the average woman? Think on this deeply and you will soon see that with every girlfriend you've had, you had a different taste in music, philosophers, activities or the lack thereof (just wanting to sit in your damn mancave) and on the whole your thinking and charachter is different. Opposites don't attract. How can there be friendship? Nietzsche even wrote himself that man and woman cannot be friends.
Nooo i mean it hits hard because that's what i love about being in love and i never managed to put it into words.... I just don't like giving strangers online my name haha
@@CynicalBastard I don’t know if I believe in love, part of me think it’s a truck my brain plays into procreating but I also know love is a human need so it’s a tricky one
please, do not consider loneliness a flaw, unless you have literally nobody at your home which is quite awkward, but you can still enjoy out of it, no?
3:48 This was a very succinct explanation of what depression does to you. You genuinely love flowers, but you neglect to water them because your illness has made you incapable of caring. You've lost "perhaps the most fundamental" piece of a critical human experience: the ability to love. chills. side note: been single all 18 years of my life. i've always craved the intimacy of romance, but it's important not to take platonic love for granted :)
what kind of romance you ask for, a chill moment laid on the bed with your intimate on your freetime, talking about casual routine without eye contact whilst possibly messing around with your smartphone? by imagining this scenario i realise that you do not need to express love to feel it from eachother, as if your intimate and you were with your hearts exposed and linked to eachother by two veins who give and receive blood to keep eachother alive, none of that "you're so beautiful", "I love you" seems necessary here, only the fact that you achieved the moment where you're both together, alone, can fuel you with just enough diesel, would you crave anything more? weird, but i just explained a very important part of love without any help, but i still feel an impending doom from this, as if you could suddenly fall out of it, or is it just me? maybe i'm having traumatic episodes from previous breakups, as if my heart lost the middle part and tried to solve the problem by merging the left and the right, reducing the volume of it, let's say, that the heart i refer to in this phrase can be called love I hope you don't suffer this terrible fate, you probably won't, but its good to warn (sorry for the long text btw i like to speak things this way)
@@davitucsonn2243I think I understand what you got. This feeling can be apply to both platonic love and romantic love. I got best friend where I could just do nothing for hour and we both just hang out in the same room, just being comfortable in each other presence. This also apply to my partner, where you can just feel warm without doing anything.
The amount of pessimism is this comment section is really disheartening. You are all capable of both giving and receiving something so precious, but its just like he says in the video and the effort it takes is immense for someone who hasn't tried before. Get out of your comfort zone and put the effort in, and you will often times see that suddenly your comfort zone has expanded.
@@Firejowl There is someone compatible with everyone on this earth, it doesn't mean there are a lot of options for everyone, it doesn't mean that it is easy for everyone, and it doesn't mean that you have to keep trying with the same person because you think nobody else will be attracted to you. It is harder for different people of different personalities and appearances, but there is definitely someone out there for everyone if they try their hardest to find that person and be open with them. People are attracted to some stuff that I would consider pretty gross but everyone has different tastes and there is no trait a person can have that NOBODY on this earth likes.
@@weebaker *There is someone compatible with everyone on this earth* Gotta love the magical thinking in regards to this totally materialist take, above, in the video, on love. "Erich Fromm occasionally refers to as 'the person without a mask'. This is the type of person who, without disavowing his or her biological and social nature, does not avoid freedom and responsibility" Eric Fromm is an impossibilist.
This video helped me realise that I love my closest friends very much, not in a romantic way, but we all go about our friendship with eachother the same way described in the video. We're interested in eachother and their growth, we genuinely respect eachother and we always try to help when needed. I would be so depressed if anything happened to sever our friendship
That's a good point that I didn't think about. While romantic love is different from platonic love, their fundamentals are probably mostly the same. Thanks for sharing
- Simplicity, patience, compassion.These three are your greatest treasures. Simple in actions and thoughts, you return to the source of being. Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are. Compassionate toward yourself,you reconcile all beings in the world. -Lao Tzu
I’ve been married for the better part of a decade now and I have to agree with Fromm in that it is harder work than you initially believe. *edit* thinking about this a bit more I’m reminded of a thing I was told just before I married my wife, advice I thought was ridiculous at the time. Every day when you get up, you have to make the conscious decision to love your partner. Early in a relationship when love is effortless, this sounds absurd, like... how unromantic is that, having to consciously decide that you love someone. But as time goes on and you hit some turbulence and meet challenges, you and your partner change and become a little different than when you started. That effortless love eventually dissipates and without an anchor you may eventually float apart, never seeing each other again. Love is difficult at every stage. Early love is fickle and easily extinguished, but intense and effortless. Later love is less fickle, and with proper care and feeding far more durable, but still requires work or else it’ll erode away into nothing.
1. Man to man, you, sir, think like a man. Your wife doesn't. There's less of an internal push from inside the woman in comparison to you to make that effort as you describe. Women want the chase and the emotional tingles, not the committed man, eventhough they can't admit that. 2. Convince me, a random guy from the Netherlands, 22yo, who has just left university in a fit of rage because of its radical feminist narrative being stuffed down the throats of the few men and many already radicalized women there. Why should I make such a daily effort for a woman who I know is very likely not to return it. Do you enjoy keeping her busy, entertained, satisfying her ever-changing whims regarding holidays, shopping left, right and centre, visits to her mother, all kinds of inane social activities just so you may have the great privilege of having earned intimacy with her once in a month or so while she does the starfish? Excuse my cynicism, but remember that even if you can't admit I'm right about this, you sure know other men who have come to think like me through the modern experience.
@@Dutch_bastard_23 I don’t know if you’re speaking from experience, but I don’t think it’s fair to generalize half the planet to your description. Certainly we don’t want to be chased around. Some may, but you cannot define all women by these standards. In the same fashion I could say “men just want to have sex and be surrounded by women, they don’t care about love” and that would be a true statement for some men but not all. Your one bad experience with women does not define all of them.
@@Dutch_bastard_23 this effort isn't really a huge burden. It's a reminder I can give myself while I'm brushing my teeth in the morning. The reason for it isn't so much to... entertain, or satisfy her whims so much as it is a simple thought that impacts how I interact with her. If you're with someone whose values largely align with your own you'll find that most of those things aren't really big issues; in fact, I'll even go so far as to say that I actually like my mother in law. As was said in the video, it isn't so much that people want to love as they want to *be loved*. In a really long term relationship it's easy to get into a rhythm that ends in feeling like you have a roommate instead of a partner. It's a reminder that this is a person I chose to spend my life with, who chose the same with me, at a minimum needs me to not be an asshole, but ideally needs me to show her my love and support. All you can really control is yourself. If you find yourself in a string of unsatisfying relationships consider looking inward for why you may be attracting people who aren't a good fit. Raging at "radical feminists" isn't a productive path that leads anywhere good. I'm a good bit older, and if I could go back and give myself some advice when I was 22 I would tell myself to focus on living the best life I could for myself and the rest would sort itself out. I know that can be incredibly difficult with a young man's libido, but you might find that it ends up being how you find yourself in better relationships.
@@flavorlessquark8614 by "chase" I meant that the woman usually wants to chase the man that gives her her special emotional tingles, not that the man should chase and beg for her, that she finds very unattractive. The statement that "men just want sex" is more true than you might think and I shall grant you that it sounds quite sad, but that doesn't make it less true. A man has to really think hard in order NOT to want sex with a woman, while a woman has to really think hard in order to WANT sex with one of the tens or hundreds of men that message her and are continually looking at her. For a young man sex isn't so much a 'mental option' as a bit of a necessity and the oldest torment known to man is a woman witholding it, because she doesn't feel the stranger danger tingles anymore. The actual scientific reason that men STAY with their women and don't pursue other women all the time as they sure have some inclination to (if you doubt this, just remember that every man cannot resist porn, which consists of thousands of different women that pleasure him) is a specific hormone that is produced within his body over time during frequent sex which I believe has links to estrogen, but forgive me for my bad memory on this, that makes him actually naturally feel more attraction towards his one specific woman. Several studies have indicated that it is MEN who cannot get over their exes and think of them long after break ups in comparison to women who seem to 1. Lose sexual attraction in any long term relationship and 2. Seem to get over their men a lot easier by having another man filling in the gap, often quicker. In other words, sex makes men love their specific woman and without it he isn't happy, whereas women can easily withold it if she isn't otherwise emotionally satisfied.
I liked the note you added about “committing to being a better person.” I think it’s important for those in love to know that change and compromise within oneself can lead to a healthier relationship :)
As someone who's been in several years long relationships through my late teens through my twenties I have to say this video is so true. Love is an intricate and complex dance filled with so many subtle meanings/gestures. Currently I'm turning 31 tomorrow and this is the first Valentine's Day I've been alone in a very long while. I came to the realization after my last breakup I was focusing too much on my partner and not on myself, not allowing myself to grow and change. Working on that now so hopefully my next relationship (whenever that'll happen) will have some sort of a base instead of being a wild flung start that sizzles out in the second or third year.
Wow, that philosopher dude is spot on, a lot of folk would come to similar conclusions with experience, about what is the right way to love. For too many, its about control, status and about enriching the self at the expense of the growth and freedom of the other.
I've been freaking out over the fact that I am currently in the process of getting my first girlfriend and this video pops up on my recommended, it feels like a gift from the heavens
As someone who does not understand or desire love and its emotions this gives me better understanding into the topic and points to think of reasons why I do not. Thank you.
@@tirobo I've never really identified or looked into these terms before your comment. After much research, I have to say I feel precisely like people of that community. Thank you Tim. You've helped me feel not alone in the way I am
But I think that this isn't about romantic love per se. I mean loving a person platonically like you love a child or a good friend works pretty much the same way and in that sense everyone needs love, regardless of their sexual or romantic desires. I totally support asexual and aromantic people though.
I've had two 2+ year relationships that ended. On the latter, a friend and I were both single in May 2019. We both wanted to find true love again and wished each other good luck. The next month we both started dating our next long term partners. Four months in, he proposed, and married five months after that. While I found that too quick, they are still happily married so far (May 2021). In comparison, it took my last GF and I 19 months of dating before moving in, and it ended four months after that on her account. He was adamant that "sometimes when you know, you know" in regards to his fast-track marriage. My partner was also extremely independent and didn't need a relationship, emotionally or otherwise. Things like this have given me a lot to think about. I don't want to collect long-term failed relationships.
Love is not a feeling its a choice. If both people are on the same page about that and choose each other, you get a committed long term relationship and grow to love each other along the way
I'm so thrilled that you studied and referenced Eric Fromm's work! When it comes to the true meaning of love, his work really stands out from the rest. Thank you, wonderful little video.
Something I really enjoy about your videos which I feel isn't talked about enough is the quality of your writing; a lot of care clearly goes into writing your scripts and it definitely shows, yours are probably among the most eloquent and easy to follow videos on this platform. Keep it up!
This is really interesting to think about as a teenager and watching all the adolescents at my school and such go through relationships and love. Good video dude!
Thank you for introducing me to this book, just finished it today. If you’re interested in this subject I would recommend picking this book up. Even in reading it after watching this video, I have learned a surprising amount more.
I like the effort you put in this and basically all of your videos, this time I took the braveness to write you something and that something is a huge thank you, it seems like you love your followers so much that you do researches, you give examples in order to try to make a sense out of all of this mess that life is, in this particular case thank you because now I know a little more about love.
Sometimes you can take someone in full heartedly loving them with everything you have when they have nothing. But if you do that well enough they won’t need you as much and you’re responsibility you had to make sure they’re ok becomes obsessive and controlling. Remember you’re partnered won’t always need you to help them through their life when they feel they’ve grown let them take their own responsibilities don’t try and keep hold of them. When someone grows away let them go just as a parent shouldn’t keep there 23 year old son or daughter home.
i lost the only person that ever loved me (excluding my mother) 10 years ago. ive fallen in love many times since, but it was never reciprocated, and wont ever be. like your video as always, man. although i think its quite onesided. (english isnt my first language sorry) anyway heres a tip from me to everyone here: if youre lucky enough to have someone in your life, cherish it, use the time like its your last hour. whatever, it doesnt really matter, just please dont end up like me
I have been *SO* blessed and fortunate to have this- or something pretty dang close- from most of my friends for my entire life.🥰 I sincerely feel this has been some subconscious undertaking of mine too, for as long as I can remember. Maybe that’s why I’ve been blessed with such great friends!🤗 TFS, dude!
To love is to commit to being a better person. I know this to be true. I used to not be good at communication. But because I loved I wanted to be better..for them and myself. It didn’t seem like they were committed to the same goal. I unfortunately lost them. It hurts. I am sad.
Love is a commitment in for which we give up some of what we enjoy for the security and overall well being of having and treating another with mutual respect.
I'm on a different plane, as non-narcissistically as that can be taken. I actually feel like I'm behind in most aspects. I'm very likeable in the workplace; etc. but only where conversation takes priority over silence. I actually have no idea how to talk to anyone. I've been out of relationships for over 7 years now and am now convinced that I am 100% dying alone. I'm actually decently handsome lmao. The road around is invisible and every moment of my existence is unbearable. I don't know what to do and I don't know where to go. I simply don't pick up on hints and don't give hints of my own. IDK... Everyone else has such an easy time with it it seems. How tf does one break out of this?
Okay, this fucking slapped. I'm forever grateful you shared this ever-shareable knowledge with (most) of our kind. I hope to see a world where nontoxic, Healthy, And flourishing love fruits. if you see this, remember, the other person is literally hurtling on this rock just the same as you, with every right to be how they want, just as you do. We've wars bc some ideas are too important not to fight, I guess this is the leading ideas that won over time?
"Love… is a quest for truth… truth in relation to something quite precise: what kind of world does one see when one experiences it from the point of view of two and not one? What is the world like when it is experienced, developed and lived from the point of view of difference and not identity? That is what I believe love to be." - Alain Badiou
Im 15 i stopped seeing love as an object after i hung out with a girl for a while but completely failed to see us as friends but rather as a future couple and when she said no i realised we didnt really fit cuz we didnt have anything in common and jt just kinda sucked
Be happy not to be loved. If u stay unloved it becomes a constant. U are then constantly unloved it is stable. In this stable state u can find happiness. For you know it will stay the same. The only thing you change then is yourself. You are now alone. You are working to make a better you in your own view of what you think you should be. In this quest you are strong and you will be happy. Now you can find joy with yourself. Now you dont need love.
Love is attachment and there is zero possibility of true happiness while you are attached to basically anything. Where there is love there is suffering. Being alone you have an actual possibility to find real happiness.
“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.”
- Nietzsche
says the eternal simp
He'd know, he has failed to steal a wife of his friend twice xD
Guess they were friends then hein
@@user-wm8xf3yv6i 😂🤣
@@user-wm8xf3yv6i 你的名字是什么意思
How much does the average man have in common with the average woman? Think on this deeply and you will soon see that with every girlfriend you've had, you had a different taste in music, philosophers, activities or the lack thereof (just wanting to sit in your damn mancave) and on the whole your thinking and charachter is different. Opposites don't attract. How can there be friendship? Nietzsche even wrote himself that man and woman cannot be friends.
Are you trying to tell me something syphilis
I spat out my coffee laughing at this, so thank you
Yoooo lmfao yeah I needed a good laugh bro. Thanks.
@@phallusmalgus5394 good name
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Bruh this hit me like an m1-abrams doing 70 mph, dear god.
To love is to commit to being a better person...... damn that hits hard
Somehow your nick is a perfect complement to your comment
That’s what some people want and need.
Nooo i mean it hits hard because that's what i love about being in love and i never managed to put it into words.... I just don't like giving strangers online my name haha
Why aren't we all in love? wouldn't that make us "all better"? Do we need Jesus again?
@@CynicalBastard I don’t know if I believe in love, part of me think it’s a truck my brain plays into procreating but I also know love is a human need so it’s a tricky one
Nothing better than watching a Sisyphus video bout love while drowning in the loneliness
There's always prostitutes
yessirrr
Indeed 🥲🔥
Real
please, do not consider loneliness a flaw, unless you have literally nobody at your home which is quite awkward, but you can still enjoy out of it, no?
When did Casually Explained guy turn so serious and philosophical?
Different guy
@@jop.6330 c'mon mate
@@jop.6330 here he was trying to meme ethically and you had to muck it all up
@@artificiallychallenged sorry, my bad
@@jop.6330 whoosh
3:48 This was a very succinct explanation of what depression does to you. You genuinely love flowers, but you neglect to water them because your illness has made you incapable of caring. You've lost "perhaps the most fundamental" piece of a critical human experience: the ability to love. chills.
side note: been single all 18 years of my life. i've always craved the intimacy of romance, but it's important not to take platonic love for granted :)
what kind of romance you ask for, a chill moment laid on the bed with your intimate on your freetime, talking about casual routine without eye contact whilst possibly messing around with your smartphone?
by imagining this scenario i realise that you do not need to express love to feel it from eachother, as if your intimate and you were with your hearts exposed and linked to eachother by two veins who give and receive blood to keep eachother alive, none of that "you're so beautiful", "I love you" seems necessary here, only the fact that you achieved the moment where you're both together, alone, can fuel you with just enough diesel, would you crave anything more?
weird, but i just explained a very important part of love without any help, but i still feel an impending doom from this, as if you could suddenly fall out of it, or is it just me? maybe i'm having traumatic episodes from previous breakups, as if my heart lost the middle part and tried to solve the problem by merging the left and the right, reducing the volume of it, let's say, that the heart i refer to in this phrase can be called love
I hope you don't suffer this terrible fate, you probably won't, but its good to warn (sorry for the long text btw i like to speak things this way)
@@davitucsonn2243 ooooo.... 😂
@@davitucsonn2243I think I understand what you got. This feeling can be apply to both platonic love and romantic love. I got best friend where I could just do nothing for hour and we both just hang out in the same room, just being comfortable in each other presence. This also apply to my partner, where you can just feel warm without doing anything.
*insert funny I have no girlfriend message*
"Hopefully this video helps"
Idk why, but this video made me feel a bit better about spending Valentine's day alone again
same!
Alan Payne? Jenna? Get a room 💞
@@stephenridley1153 I put their names in love calculator and they have 102% chance of falling in love together with a 2% margin of error
I'm just gonna sit alone in the corner and watching you and Jenna making love.
The amount of pessimism is this comment section is really disheartening. You are all capable of both giving and receiving something so precious, but its just like he says in the video and the effort it takes is immense for someone who hasn't tried before. Get out of your comfort zone and put the effort in, and you will often times see that suddenly your comfort zone has expanded.
Amen!
It takes two to tango. Just because you are willing to dedicate yourself to the pursuit of love doesn't mean it's always reciprocal
@@Firejowl There is someone compatible with everyone on this earth, it doesn't mean there are a lot of options for everyone, it doesn't mean that it is easy for everyone, and it doesn't mean that you have to keep trying with the same person because you think nobody else will be attracted to you. It is harder for different people of different personalities and appearances, but there is definitely someone out there for everyone if they try their hardest to find that person and be open with them. People are attracted to some stuff that I would consider pretty gross but everyone has different tastes and there is no trait a person can have that NOBODY on this earth likes.
@@weebaker allow me to introduce myself lol
@@weebaker *There is someone compatible with everyone on this earth*
Gotta love the magical thinking in regards to this totally materialist take, above, in the video, on love. "Erich Fromm occasionally refers to as 'the person without a mask'. This is the type of person who, without disavowing his or her biological and social nature, does not avoid freedom and responsibility" Eric Fromm is an impossibilist.
Instructions unclear, although I did fall so no dislike.
This is an amazing comment
Write love on the floor you're gonna land on the next time you fall, make sure you land right on that spot so you can fall in love.
i **love** these videos haha hehe :)
Did the formatting fail?
i **love** when you upload haha hehe :)
You... 😳
czcams.com/video/k6GzKTVi2rE/video.html
What is Love?
√ Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me... no more...
HE DID THAT ONE BEFORE >:|
Bum bum bum bum bu bum bum bum bum bu bum bum bum bum bu bum bum
No, I don't know why you're not fair
I give you my love, but you don't care
I was literally just singing it while watching the video!
This video helped me realise that I love my closest friends very much, not in a romantic way, but we all go about our friendship with eachother the same way described in the video. We're interested in eachother and their growth, we genuinely respect eachother and we always try to help when needed. I would be so depressed if anything happened to sever our friendship
That's a good point that I didn't think about. While romantic love is different from platonic love, their fundamentals are probably mostly the same. Thanks for sharing
Oooo how come I can't make friends!!! WHY am I not desirable
@@sayedalazam4228I don’t know if you shout at the void. It likely a combination of environmental and personal problems.
- Simplicity, patience, compassion.These three are your greatest treasures. Simple in actions and thoughts, you return to the source of being. Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are. Compassionate toward yourself,you reconcile all beings in the world. -Lao Tzu
I’ve been married for the better part of a decade now and I have to agree with Fromm in that it is harder work than you initially believe.
*edit* thinking about this a bit more I’m reminded of a thing I was told just before I married my wife, advice I thought was ridiculous at the time. Every day when you get up, you have to make the conscious decision to love your partner. Early in a relationship when love is effortless, this sounds absurd, like... how unromantic is that, having to consciously decide that you love someone. But as time goes on and you hit some turbulence and meet challenges, you and your partner change and become a little different than when you started. That effortless love eventually dissipates and without an anchor you may eventually float apart, never seeing each other again.
Love is difficult at every stage. Early love is fickle and easily extinguished, but intense and effortless. Later love is less fickle, and with proper care and feeding far more durable, but still requires work or else it’ll erode away into nothing.
1. Man to man, you, sir, think like a man. Your wife doesn't. There's less of an internal push from inside the woman in comparison to you to make that effort as you describe. Women want the chase and the emotional tingles, not the committed man, eventhough they can't admit that.
2. Convince me, a random guy from the Netherlands, 22yo, who has just left university in a fit of rage because of its radical feminist narrative being stuffed down the throats of the few men and many already radicalized women there. Why should I make such a daily effort for a woman who I know is very likely not to return it. Do you enjoy keeping her busy, entertained, satisfying her ever-changing whims regarding holidays, shopping left, right and centre, visits to her mother, all kinds of inane social activities just so you may have the great privilege of having earned intimacy with her once in a month or so while she does the starfish? Excuse my cynicism, but remember that even if you can't admit I'm right about this, you sure know other men who have come to think like me through the modern experience.
@@Dutch_bastard_23 I don’t know if you’re speaking from experience, but I don’t think it’s fair to generalize half the planet to your description. Certainly we don’t want to be chased around. Some may, but you cannot define all women by these standards. In the same fashion I could say “men just want to have sex and be surrounded by women, they don’t care about love” and that would be a true statement for some men but not all.
Your one bad experience with women does not define all of them.
@@Dutch_bastard_23 your ignorance would be laughable if it wasn't so sexist
@@Dutch_bastard_23 this effort isn't really a huge burden. It's a reminder I can give myself while I'm brushing my teeth in the morning. The reason for it isn't so much to... entertain, or satisfy her whims so much as it is a simple thought that impacts how I interact with her. If you're with someone whose values largely align with your own you'll find that most of those things aren't really big issues; in fact, I'll even go so far as to say that I actually like my mother in law.
As was said in the video, it isn't so much that people want to love as they want to *be loved*. In a really long term relationship it's easy to get into a rhythm that ends in feeling like you have a roommate instead of a partner. It's a reminder that this is a person I chose to spend my life with, who chose the same with me, at a minimum needs me to not be an asshole, but ideally needs me to show her my love and support.
All you can really control is yourself. If you find yourself in a string of unsatisfying relationships consider looking inward for why you may be attracting people who aren't a good fit. Raging at "radical feminists" isn't a productive path that leads anywhere good. I'm a good bit older, and if I could go back and give myself some advice when I was 22 I would tell myself to focus on living the best life I could for myself and the rest would sort itself out. I know that can be incredibly difficult with a young man's libido, but you might find that it ends up being how you find yourself in better relationships.
@@flavorlessquark8614 by "chase" I meant that the woman usually wants to chase the man that gives her her special emotional tingles, not that the man should chase and beg for her, that she finds very unattractive.
The statement that "men just want sex" is more true than you might think and I shall grant you that it sounds quite sad, but that doesn't make it less true. A man has to really think hard in order NOT to want sex with a woman, while a woman has to really think hard in order to WANT sex with one of the tens or hundreds of men that message her and are continually looking at her. For a young man sex isn't so much a 'mental option' as a bit of a necessity and the oldest torment known to man is a woman witholding it, because she doesn't feel the stranger danger tingles anymore. The actual scientific reason that men STAY with their women and don't pursue other women all the time as they sure have some inclination to (if you doubt this, just remember that every man cannot resist porn, which consists of thousands of different women that pleasure him) is a specific hormone that is produced within his body over time during frequent sex which I believe has links to estrogen, but forgive me for my bad memory on this, that makes him actually naturally feel more attraction towards his one specific woman. Several studies have indicated that it is MEN who cannot get over their exes and think of them long after break ups in comparison to women who seem to 1. Lose sexual attraction in any long term relationship and 2. Seem to get over their men a lot easier by having another man filling in the gap, often quicker.
In other words, sex makes men love their specific woman and without it he isn't happy, whereas women can easily withold it if she isn't otherwise emotionally satisfied.
Good thing Sisyphus put this out I almost downloaded hinge
I'm digging the projector animation sequences, and also the new visuals for quotations. Great content as always!
Great advice, shame no one who watches this has anyone to apply it to
Apply it to yourself at least
Facts 🤣😓
That was a quick jab but boy did it stun me
sakit naman
Speak for yourself.
I liked the note you added about “committing to being a better person.” I think it’s important for those in love to know that change and compromise within oneself can lead to a healthier relationship :)
Im trying to pay attention, but i cant stop listening to those smoooooooth jazz changes in the background
Please don’t fall in love with the wrong person, very bad for health
Sometimes you don't know it till after a while being with them. Love is a powerful drug.
As someone who's been in several years long relationships through my late teens through my twenties I have to say this video is so true. Love is an intricate and complex dance filled with so many subtle meanings/gestures.
Currently I'm turning 31 tomorrow and this is the first Valentine's Day I've been alone in a very long while. I came to the realization after my last breakup I was focusing too much on my partner and not on myself, not allowing myself to grow and change. Working on that now so hopefully my next relationship (whenever that'll happen) will have some sort of a base instead of being a wild flung start that sizzles out in the second or third year.
best of luck:)
Wow, that philosopher dude is spot on, a lot of folk would come to similar conclusions with experience, about what is the right way to love. For too many, its about control, status and about enriching the self at the expense of the growth and freedom of the other.
Omg..... YES. Agreed and can attest to this
I've been freaking out over the fact that I am currently in the process of getting my first girlfriend and this video pops up on my recommended, it feels like a gift from the heavens
Godspeed brother.
wish you two da best🫂
hey, it worked out?
"...part of what makes a person unlovable is his inability to love."
As someone who does not understand or desire love and its emotions this gives me better understanding into the topic and points to think of reasons why I do not. Thank you.
aro?
@@tirobo I've never really identified or looked into these terms before your comment. After much research, I have to say I feel precisely like people of that community. Thank you Tim. You've helped me feel not alone in the way I am
@@ShawarmaFarmer awwwwwwwww,, thats too sweet
But I think that this isn't about romantic love per se. I mean loving a person platonically like you love a child or a good friend works pretty much the same way and in that sense everyone needs love, regardless of their sexual or romantic desires. I totally support asexual and aromantic people though.
sweetest outcome i’ve ever seen in a comment section
I've had two 2+ year relationships that ended. On the latter, a friend and I were both single in May 2019. We both wanted to find true love again and wished each other good luck. The next month we both started dating our next long term partners. Four months in, he proposed, and married five months after that. While I found that too quick, they are still happily married so far (May 2021). In comparison, it took my last GF and I 19 months of dating before moving in, and it ended four months after that on her account. He was adamant that "sometimes when you know, you know" in regards to his fast-track marriage. My partner was also extremely independent and didn't need a relationship, emotionally or otherwise. Things like this have given me a lot to think about. I don't want to collect long-term failed relationships.
All my relationships are short term, the grass is always greener on the other side but I'm jealous
Love is not a feeling its a choice. If both people are on the same page about that and choose each other, you get a committed long term relationship and grow to love each other along the way
Damn you really used the Union Guy Knows How to Argue video that popped up in my feed the other day
Cool vid
this hits different after the “for her” video
I'm so thrilled that you studied and referenced Eric Fromm's work! When it comes to the true meaning of love, his work really stands out from the rest. Thank you, wonderful little video.
Something I really enjoy about your videos which I feel isn't talked about enough is the quality of your writing; a lot of care clearly goes into writing your scripts and it definitely shows, yours are probably among the most eloquent and easy to follow videos on this platform. Keep it up!
This is really interesting to think about as a teenager and watching all the adolescents at my school and such go through relationships and love. Good video dude!
You seriously are one of the greatest channels out there. I for one immensely appreciate your content. Keep creating, keep it up.
I learned everything I know about love from sid the science kid
then you know nothing.
WAH
Been feeling like I’m missing out been alone for a long time, so I appreciate this video Sisyphus thank you
"Go back"
"I said go back"
Thank you for introducing me to this book, just finished it today. If you’re interested in this subject I would recommend picking this book up. Even in reading it after watching this video, I have learned a surprising amount more.
Sisyphus the guy who trying to push a rock to top of the mountain against gods well can't fall in love xD
He loves the rock
I love how a lot of your video titles lean in the direction of Incel stuff, but you adress the issues in a thoughtful, constructive, and helpful way
I casually type how to fall in love and found this video.. Yea.. I don't have romatic feeling inside me anymore.. Why? It feels empty
*wants to be loved, but scared to get in a relationship cause ive been hurt so many times*
I like the effort you put in this and basically all of your videos, this time I took the braveness to write you something and that something is a huge thank you, it seems like you love your followers so much that you do researches, you give examples in order to try to make a sense out of all of this mess that life is, in this particular case thank you because now I know a little more about love.
"Come as you are, as you were. As I want you to be. As a trend, as a friend. As an old enemy"
Good reminder of the importance of authenticity (in the way Gabor Mate talks about authenticity and connection).
I have fallen in love with the God's joke of existence. The only time I haven't had regrets about loving something.
Sometimes you can take someone in full heartedly loving them with everything you have when they have nothing. But if you do that well enough they won’t need you as much and you’re responsibility you had to make sure they’re ok becomes obsessive and controlling. Remember you’re partnered won’t always need you to help them through their life when they feel they’ve grown let them take their own responsibilities don’t try and keep hold of them. When someone grows away let them go just as a parent shouldn’t keep there 23 year old son or daughter home.
i lost the only person that ever loved me (excluding my mother) 10 years ago.
ive fallen in love many times since, but it was never reciprocated, and wont ever be.
like your video as always, man. although i think its quite onesided. (english isnt my first language sorry)
anyway heres a tip from me to everyone here:
if youre lucky enough to have someone in your life, cherish it, use the time like its your last hour. whatever, it doesnt really matter,
just please dont end up like me
Hope you’re doing okay!
This guy hasn't changed his mic quality in years. Thank you.
This is one of my favourite channels now, I love you mr sisyphus 55!
I have been *SO* blessed and fortunate to have this- or something pretty dang close- from most of my friends for my entire life.🥰 I sincerely feel this has been some subconscious undertaking of mine too, for as long as I can remember. Maybe that’s why I’ve been blessed with such great friends!🤗 TFS, dude!
love coming back to your videos thank u for existing
I like that nothing in the vid requires a romantic relationship to be good advice. These are good steps to relating to any human
Love your videos ,they are a great source of perspectives and info ,keep up the good work
“To love is to commit to being a better person”
💯.. this needs to be seen far and wide
i just happened to watch this video before a quiz and i managed to scrape by, thanks sisyphus 55
I clicked for the thumbnail alone, truly a special video sysiphus
Just thank you for this video. I feel more at ease with my love interest due to it.
this is a phenomenal video, i enjoyed it deeply
To love is to commit to being a better person. I know this to be true. I used to not be good at communication. But because I loved I wanted to be better..for them and myself. It didn’t seem like they were committed to the same goal. I unfortunately lost them. It hurts. I am sad.
Liked for the union boss video while talking about success. An excellent touch, the master stroke.
Love is a commitment in for which we give up some of what we enjoy for the security and overall well being of having and treating another with mutual respect.
I'm on a different plane, as non-narcissistically as that can be taken. I actually feel like I'm behind in most aspects. I'm very likeable in the workplace; etc. but only where conversation takes priority over silence. I actually have no idea how to talk to anyone. I've been out of relationships for over 7 years now and am now convinced that I am 100% dying alone. I'm actually decently handsome lmao. The road around is invisible and every moment of my existence is unbearable. I don't know what to do and I don't know where to go. I simply don't pick up on hints and don't give hints of my own. IDK... Everyone else has such an easy time with it it seems. How tf does one break out of this?
Fantastic video as always! Keep up the good work!
I feel this video, not because im hopelessly chasing a loved one but because i don't 'love' i want to love
I got his book on the art of loving, its a very eye opening text
The don herzfeldt vibes are strong in this vid, good job!
Man, your content is amazing
ur getting better and better at editing
I refuse to give up on love. I must keep moving forward for love.
Okay, this fucking slapped. I'm forever grateful you shared this ever-shareable knowledge with (most) of our kind. I hope to see a world where nontoxic, Healthy, And flourishing love fruits. if you see this, remember, the other person is literally hurtling on this rock just the same as you, with every right to be how they want, just as you do. We've wars bc some ideas are too important not to fight, I guess this is the leading ideas that won over time?
I can’t feel love, not even with my family, it’s like I’m immune to it
Love was the worst experience i have lived so far.
Can you do a discussion on Taoism? I’ve been spending a lot of time on it and think it would be a great philosophy to get into.
"To love is to commit to being a better person."
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
This is a very insightful video! Really very good.
Nice content Sisyphus 🙏
Met this bee going around blue flowers it was pretty windy but it kept around and when it was done, it flew away.
Happy Valentines Day, Sisyphus :)
your monotone voice mixed with the calm music is just :ok_hand:
"Love… is a quest for truth… truth in relation to something quite precise: what kind of world does one see when one experiences it from the point of view of two and not one? What is the world like when it is experienced, developed and lived from the point of view of difference and not identity? That is what I believe love to be."
- Alain Badiou
Thank you for this
love this channel
Right now I would need a video on how to fall out of love
I never had the urge to have a partner, or to love someone
I was looking for some guy who analysis love, thanks!
i mean i love you sisyphus. i watch your every video :)
Im 15 i stopped seeing love as an object after i hung out with a girl for a while but completely failed to see us as friends but rather as a future couple and when she said no i realised we didnt really fit cuz we didnt have anything in common and jt just kinda sucked
Nobody wants love anymore. They want all the feel good, fun parts, without any of the hard parts, that make the feel good parts feel good.
when he started quoting erich fromm:
me: ah yes man of culture
mate, I'm just ugly
Ugly people can love to my friend. Love knows not the face.
Be happy not to be loved. If u stay unloved it becomes a constant. U are then constantly unloved it is stable. In this stable state u can find happiness. For you know it will stay the same. The only thing you change then is yourself. You are now alone. You are working to make a better you in your own view of what you think you should be. In this quest you are strong and you will be happy. Now you can find joy with yourself. Now you dont need love.
@@paulvonhindenburg367 that's beautiful (pretty funny coming from *KEKLORD*)
@@TrizzyB47
kek
Love is attachment and there is zero possibility of true happiness while you are attached to basically anything. Where there is love there is suffering. Being alone you have an actual possibility to find real happiness.
Ngl Fromm really hit the mark, I had to learn these things the hard way.
Never thought I'd feel love and be loved but I've been with my partner for 4 years. It's not always easy or fun but it's worth it.
There was a video you posted about love that I used to always come back to. I’m really upset you took it down :(
I like the little Don Hertzfeldt refference
No thanks, I think I'll avoid love.
Seems like a mountain of effort for a man and a lovely little bonus for the modern woman and her many whims.
@@Dutch_bastard_23 correction: I'll avoid love and women.
best thumbnail on yt
13th February 1:43AM
Damn.
Love that David Hoffman footage
I'll go ahead and apply these to myself.