There are only TWO GOALS: a simplified framework of action
Vložit
- čas přidán 9. 07. 2024
- Action is required because, if we do nothing, things fall apart. So goal-directed behavior is part and parcel of the human experience. However, in the near-infinite domain of human action, there are really only two goals, two avenues for all our efforts: we can either do something that we're not, or not do something that we are. Everything else is bluster, because (at heart) all goals are behavioral.
Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.
Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com
#goals #success #psychology
This is a lesson I learned from years of playing soccer. Nothing ever ends when you think it will. There is always penalty time, an extension of the struggle with an uncertain duration. Planning for penalty time will help see you through to the real finish line.
Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.
Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com
#soccer #worldcup #psychology
I think you meant this intro for your soccer themed clip, not this one on the simplification of goals.
Do you still play soccer?
It’d be so great if your sources were cited in the drop down. Though this does hit like common sense
as a mechanical engineer having thermodynamics classes my heart opens up to the persons knowing what entropy is
Start doing something you aren’t doing, or stop doing something you are doing. Sounds like the Shawshank line: “Get busy living, or get busy dying.”
My fitness and physical appearance changed dramatically when I quit doing bad things (consuming almost all sugar, consuming alcohol). Then I quit eating for a few days at a time multiple times a month. Then I started doing a couple easy things: walking everyday for an hour in the sun.
I went from 235lbs to 172lbs in four months. My skin became radiant, my muscles started to pop, vascularity went up, and overall I was feeling super. Then I added regular weight lifting for 25 minutes three times a week. It was the things that I stopped doing that made the biggest difference. The lifting over a few months wasn't hard either because I didn't do some major mountain moving all at once. I just did a little on the DO side and a lot on the DON'T side and I had people coming up to me at work and church treating me like I was some kind of fitness expert. Funny how that works.
Great message 👍🏼
Hey man! I was surprised to find you on CZcams. Years ago we spoke in the Bay Area, back when I was having trouble transitioning from military to civilian life.
You gave me some much needed perspective and guidance. Can't thank you enough! Hope you are able to reach other people
Before I turned 30, I was laid off twice and had my ex divorced me (he fell for a coworker). I had no $ in the bank and a very old car under my name (ex took the expensive bmw). I thought about it long and hard and started praying for a job that offered financial independence and secured retirement. I was working at a dead end secretarial job when I got into a public sextor job in a very large jurisdiction (don’t go for small cities or counties because the pension and job security aren’t good). I never aspired to manage people and wanted to be left alone; not good at all in private sectors. This was my long term vision; no worrying about job, money, and retirement and not relying on a man to provide. I retired laster year without debt and a house paid for. I remain single and childless. I set and achieved many short term goals in fitness and travel. I dated good guys and had a lot of fond memories. I wouldn’t say my choices are the absolute very best for me but all things considered I am pretty satisfied.
Very true. You can be a highly motivated individual, but a hangover the following day could stop you from taking action. So stopping bad habits is more of a priority than actually doing something good.
I don't do goals and planning, because I can't keep track of it. But I have the ability to manifest 3/4 of anything I put my mind into. And often have up to 8 open projects at a time. I need a finisher
the correct quote is: 'Tis an unweeded garden. That grows to seed; things rank and gross in nature. Possess it merely. - from hamlet
makes sense. fix the leak in the roof before you paint the walls. ie have a goal to stop doing something detrimental before working on your goal to build up else the bad thing might eat away at the good thing you're trying to do. Thanks!
Will be going to classes from 7:30am to 3pm. Then work 4 pm to 10 pm. It will be tiring, but the reward next year will be graduation. I don't mind pushing myself to get the rewards I want.
I support your efforts and hope you achieve your goals
@@jlocke3482 Thank you! 😊
Don’t forget to make time to let a fella take you out to lunch k or get ya reps in at gym 💪
I'm the same way
Please update this post periodically with progress reports. I suggest monthly.
thank you for helping all the young males out there who are lost
Such timely advice today as people begin resolutions. Self mastery is key, and you have a gift for sharing simple but meaningful ways to create change in our lives. May your channel continue to grow in the new year
The spinning plate analogy is perfect 👍
You’re right. It’s easier to destroy than build.
You are a GENIUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jezuzzzz! Thank you so much!!!!!!!❤️❤️❤️
Simple and effective message.
Another quote of yours that's in a different video is that "Spend approximately 50% more resources than you think you need to reach your goal before giving up." If you think it'll take a year to get in shape, plan on spending a year and a half
The description of this channel is exactly what channel is doing for people. ❤
I hope he knows that he reached the goal❤.
Im glad I came across your content . If you also enjoy Nietzsche, you are my guy in perpetuity. Greetings from Germany
I'd like to see an interview between Orion and David Goggins. That would be really good to see!
Bad things are more powerful than the good things. Makes so much sense! Great saying.
I rlly love the way you explained this framework. I love it when concepts are simplified, things that can be understood even by a child.
I hope you keep doing what you do. There are ppl out there like me who rlly need it. Thank you.
I agree completely. The biggest enemy of the best is often the good.
Short, sweet and to the point..thank you doctor!
Thank you so much, happy new year Dr Taraban! May it be your best year so far!! :D
Love this post. Makes a lot of sense. Very helpful. Thanks Ryan!
Makes a looooot of sense!👍
The 2 should be done in tandem, since I've never actually seen someone stop doing something harmful or unproductive without having the positive behavior set up. From how I understand human psychology, pain and suffering are preferable to the absence of emotion. The Void is alien in its nature, but suffering is at least familiar and thus gives comfort. Much love for the videos!
Profoundly true
so you're saying people choose the pain and suffering of trying to get something good alongside ridding themselves of the bad, rather than focusing only on eliminating the bad and sitting with the emptiness they're left with?
Absolutely fascinating. Thank you. Goal setting is a powerful motivator. Personal goal setting is personal endeavour.
Excellent video
This is one of the best videos I think you've ever done.
Thanks!
Wow!! Thank you so much... It really makes alot of sense. GOAL SETTING= AN ATTEMPT TO CHANGE OUR BEHAVIOUR
Gold 🔥 Great video! Thanks for posting this.
thank you so much 🙏
This man is full of knowledge. Such an important advice in life. Such a clear explanation. Thanks yet again, J.
... since the beginning of my life i absolutely know what i want, but since then i had to learn that i will never get it. The only thing i want now is to wait till my life ends!
I stopped doing what I was doing, so I stopped watching this video 😂
I don't give a like just because the content creator begs for it. but your philosophical/ scientific approach on the matter is really eyeopening. I never thought of it like this. your message can be life changing. and the like is more than well earned. already subscribed a few days ago and it was totally worth it. thank you sir
It all makes complete sense. Appreciate your thoughts and ideas.
Thank you
Thank you, for making it practical
Love your work! Keep up the great content
Sure, don't spread yourself too thin with your focus and time. Often, to internalize and absorb a subject or skill requires hyper focus on a single thing. And yes , destroying everything you built happens a hell of a lot faster than the time invested to build it. However, since everything crumbles and dies, It is so important to find the positive and contentment WHILE THINGS ARE FALLING APART OR IN DISARRAY. this took me a lot of bad times to figure out, THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING GOOD here, it might not be exactly what you want, but find some strength were it may be
That is a fantastic observation doc...by common sense it should be easier and more useful to stop doing smtg first to create more space and time ( doing a lil clean up ) than starting smtng new. Good thung to consider for sure ! Thank you for bringing this on :)
A simple and affective approach
You earned a sub here. Great framework.
I would love to have him as a friend. Lol he can call me out in a nice way when I'm messing up. I need a friend like that 😅
If you could write a book with material you teach on CZcams I would buy it without a second thought.
Great to see the new layout
I don't do those things, but I followed quantum breadcrumb trails and figured it out.
Great
Exactly thxxx happy new year
Happy new year, Orion!🎄🎉 Nice sweater, btw.
Thanks
True.
Excellent
2:31 smart 2:48 👍🏼.. 3:03 ahhaaa very true 3:42 key 4:18 unlocked
Truth bomb😮. One bad thing (DWI) costs for years. But, will it be the impetus to abstain from alcohol?
Simple concept, lifetime to master.
ty
Cmon pastor 🙌
I have been depressed for not seeing results for my almost 9 year growth :c I've made some mistakes and lacking discipline for a long time and I regret it but I haven't given up yet. This year I will graduate and get a job so I can be less miserable haha
You’ve got this!
It’s like there are only two stories. “ Going on a trip” and “stranger comes to town”.
I know you stated you can only have one goal at a time but why can't you set a goal to stop something while setting another goal to start something? Meaning say you want to stop an addiction but doing so creates a (time) void. You could then start working out in order to fill that void.
Thank you for all the work you put into these videos Dr.! I have been guilty of that new year's mania for so many years. I will chill a bit more and be quite more realistic this year.
Happy new year!
is improving a skill a goal? For example, I am working on getting better at playing piano - but I don't have any way to measure how much I have improved. I love the mental state of applying my time and energy to it and feeling how I get better. Maybe maintaining that mental state is the actual goal in this case?
I agree with most of this, but I disagree with the idea of only integrating only one thing at a time. If you break your time into block segments, you can dedicate a certain amount of time each day to different goals. IE: block out time for cooking/diet, exercise, and side hustle all independent of each other.
The key that I’ve found to making this work is to solely focus on the goal at hand - but perhaps attaining this focus ability is a goal needing achieved first 😁
I recommend you learn about the concept of ego depletion.
Eye opening videos. Love from istanbul
Kosher diet and shabbat practice I recently found out is a secret way that allows entropy and entanglement avoidance.
Hey Doc, I’d like your opinion on the 12 week year by Brian Moran on goal setting and prioritization.
I think i found a goal mine of a channel ❤
tip on goal setting: start small
What if my goal is to continue doing what I have been doing? 🤔
👍
Hey what’s the video where you talk about how some men are robbing the woman of having the emotional experience in the relationship ?
Trying to maintain the status quo is a recipe for suffering. Gardens require effort, nature does not - it is self regulating.
I disagree with one thing PsycHacks said. He said one bad thing can overwhelm tens of things. Not true, when it comes to marriage. I read "Why Marriages Fail or Succeed." by Dr. John Gottman. Based on decades of research, Dr. Gottman said the magic ratio is 5:1. You have to have 5 good things in your marriage, to counteract one bad thing.
They are two means
The means are the ends. There is only the process of becoming.
Here is my completely abstract version.
Is that hairgel? Yep. Probably hair gel. - Cameron Diaz
A goal is not a desired state. A goal is a clearly defined action : start x, stop x.
Actor from almost famous
Hear i disagree with you, Orion, If i have a goal of starting a garden or creating a website or making a family, my goal is actually to create a "container" for a lot of things i might not even know of when first starting out, i dont believe you can only do one goal at a time, i think we have a "container goal" and fill the container with new things, like loosing weight, we "fill" that goal with new food, clothes, socal attention and better health, and people dont see that the accomplishment of the goal is a spectrum of results we might not even know of at the beginning.
Please make videos louder.
there are only two g-
Quit alcohol
My goal is to stop masturbation.
that’s a very courageous thing to say
Bullshit! One example... i started going to the gym. I had been very disciplined about it. Was going to the gym 6/7 days a week, dient missed a single day in the first 8 month... it didnt changed my life for the better, the only thing that happened was that i have now 3 places in my body that are permanently hurt... so starting something and being disciplined about it doesnt make things better!
Told 2 woman if theyr ever reach out to me I would destroy every last good memory they have of me. Years have passed and not a single word, yet I'm 100% ready for the first word out of their mouth as long as they live. They had Zero accountability for the lack of effort to be responsible for their lack Character Values and ignorance of Virtue. After 16 months of seeing exactly who was a friend. Turns out all I had were enemies therefore I banished every last person in my past for their own freewill choices and behavors. When a good Men gets shit on by others for being generous and kind yet blunt and direct when necessary.. From my life experience humanity is shit society has shown me how much character value matters. This Primary Psycopath has changed. I really didn't want to keep that learned behavor. You all must have adapted to experiencing Cognitive Dissonance. Don't worry your genetic mutation will include your favorate emotional states that were actively sought out with extreme desire for selfish intentions. Enjoy the 20 - 25 years of stress & anxiety, or thrill & excitement. I wonder what Chronic Acute exposure to cortisol & adrenalin does the the physical body?
This is why saving money is better than earning money... you're not taxed on the money you save! (well, you are, but you know what I mean) ... sins of omission, sins of commission
Wow, thanks for the insights Captain Obvious. P
Thanks!