Why Dr Melfi never told Tony Soprano about her Attacker

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  • čas přidán 13. 02. 2023
  • Why didn't Dr Melfi tell Tony Soprano about her Employee of the Month attacker in The Sopranos?
    This video attempts to answer that question, while examining and explaining Melfi's motivation and also making a comparison with a famous scene from the original Godfather involving Don Vito Corleone.
    *SPOILERS*
    This video contains spoilers from the HBO hit series The Sopranos.
    This episode was narrated and produced by Geoffrey Ciani (aka - Rummy).
    This episode was written by Geoffrey Ciani and Christian Twiste.
    To read more by Christian Twiste please visit his blog:
    confessionsofaconservative.com/
    Why Dr Melfi never told Tony Soprano about her Employee of the Month attacker
    #TheSopranos #TonySoprano #DrMelfi #EmployeeOfTheMonth
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Komentáře • 1K

  • @Sizifus
    @Sizifus Před rokem +1612

    I think not only she understood that asking Tony to enact vengeance upon that scumbag on her behalf would break her principles of how she viewed law and punishment, but she saw in Tony someone who, if the situation requires so, wouldn't second guess himself in retrieving the "debt" she owed to him. Also, her asking Tony for help would embolden Tony in his philosophy further - when all the systems in place fail us, the crooks are the only ones that can help the victim. If she would have told him, Tony would have owned part of her soul.

    • @ButtersCCookie
      @ButtersCCookie Před rokem +26

      Beautifully said. I think about True Detective season 2. Even if it was horrible season. Who's the monster the one who commits the crime in love or opportunity? Why is there never mercy or grace for love?

    • @normancook965
      @normancook965 Před 11 měsíci +69

      Right on! Melfi was saying "no" both to perpetuating the cycle of violence and to Tony personally.

    • @JSon-yl1ty
      @JSon-yl1ty Před 8 měsíci +12

      Why couldn't the ex husband take care of things?

    • @tahireed
      @tahireed Před 8 měsíci

      ​@@normancook965 Melfi is perpetuating the cycle by letting a rapist go free. If she didn't at least call the cops she is in the wrong.

    • @bartsullivan4866
      @bartsullivan4866 Před 8 měsíci

      or the dirty cop@@JSon-yl1ty

  • @justpeachy4851
    @justpeachy4851 Před rokem +2116

    Wouldn't it have been great if Tony had found out on his own & taken care of it?

    • @vicariousgamer2871
      @vicariousgamer2871 Před rokem +106

      Agreed

    • @DarthBludgeon
      @DarthBludgeon Před rokem +153

      I like this idea. But, she still should have told him. She wouldn't have had to ask for revenge; Tony is fond of her (at least) - he would have done it on his own, I think. And how many other people will this scumbag go on to hurt or terrorize (or maybe even kill) before he is stopped "by the system"? I definitely respect her sticking to her scruples, in principle. Sometimes reality needs to get a little messy.

    • @mr.patriotjol
      @mr.patriotjol Před rokem +55

      @@DarthBludgeon i think the issue here is that she wants to do it. But there are two issues. 1) it will draw attention to the police and FBI if they found out that if the attacker recently attacked Melfi; leading to further investigations on Tony. 2) she was afraid that she could get the wrong person killed

    • @sabrinashelton1997
      @sabrinashelton1997 Před rokem +49

      @@DarthBludgeon This is what I think. I don't really think he would have held her in debt to him. She could have just told him what she went through and he would have taken care of the rest. That's how I saw it, at least.

    • @tedwojtasik8781
      @tedwojtasik8781 Před rokem +1

      @@mr.patriotjol I think you watch too much TV. The cops would give zero shits for a dead brown person, regardless of who did the killing or why. Brown people, immigrants, poor whites get murdered and go missing every day and the cops do nothing because no one cares about those people, they are the forgotten. However, if some pretty, blonde, white co-ed get's killed by some unhinged stalker, that's on the news cycle for several weeks, all resources utilized to find the killer, all hands on deck. Meanwhile Native women are trafficked cross border between the US and Canada, and then turn up dead and...nothing, not even a mention. Hell, Tony could have walked up to the guy, shot him in the head in broad daylight, and if they did not know he was Tony Soprano, would have let him go once he claimed "self defense" because when a white man kills a brown man, it's all good to the US justice system.

  • @joshuahoover6841
    @joshuahoover6841 Před rokem +924

    Her simple "no" in response to Tony's question is one of the most powerful scenes ever. One word and it kinda gives me chills.

    • @WowLynchWow
      @WowLynchWow  Před rokem +35

      100% agreed!

    • @SinclairSan
      @SinclairSan Před 11 měsíci +5

      how

    • @kalabhairava56
      @kalabhairava56 Před 11 měsíci +12

      @@SinclairSan she sacrificed herself for tony cause and her own oath of doctors

    • @tagekoolander
      @tagekoolander Před 11 měsíci +22

      Its sacred and propane

    • @GRUSTLER
      @GRUSTLER Před 8 měsíci +21

      ​@@tagekoolanderpropane is a flammable substance.

  • @claymac7895
    @claymac7895 Před rokem +752

    I’m surprised Tony didn’t look into this on his own and discover what happened. He was intuitive enough and knew her well enough to pick up that something bad happened.

    • @nothihn1180
      @nothihn1180 Před 8 měsíci +64

      because he didn't know she was raped.
      she told him she just got into an accident.

    • @ContactsNfilters
      @ContactsNfilters Před 8 měsíci +46

      Yeah irl it wouldn't have been difficult for him to have found the police reports at all. It would've been satisfying for the audience.

    • @johnroscoe2406
      @johnroscoe2406 Před 8 měsíci +66

      Tony is still a power freak. He needs YOU to come to HIM.

    • @robluv4592
      @robluv4592 Před 8 měsíci +6

      She was right ..

    • @judywright4241
      @judywright4241 Před 7 měsíci +31

      Except Dr Melfi was trusted, so her ‘no’ as messed up as she is, was taken to what Tony had for a heart. As enraged as Tony would be, he is still a predator too, and he’d expect some ‘gratitude’ after he tortured that rapist to death. It’s not like he would just stop after getting away with assault and rape. So one predator wipes out another one.
      The fallout continued too, the tenuous relationship with her ex, Richard fell apart. Her son, took to drugs to deal with his own guilt and was angry at Richard too.

  • @robjones2408
    @robjones2408 Před 6 měsíci +99

    "When seeking revenge, dig two graves." - Confucius
    Dr. Melfi may have been aware of that quote. If she had told Tony, he would have had her in his malignant power. A brilliant, heartbreaking scene.

    • @Sorrelhas
      @Sorrelhas Před 2 měsíci +2

      "I'm killing way more than two people"
      - Albert Einstein

  • @TeenageMutantZuckerTurtle
    @TeenageMutantZuckerTurtle Před 7 měsíci +488

    Her arc was about the temptation to use her connection to a mob boss to get revenge after the legal system failed. Her firm “no” when he asked if something was wrong was a defining point for her character midway through the series.
    No matter how much her attacker deserved the death that Tony would have delivered, she chose not to go down that path, not to bring herself into Tony’s criminal world by being complicit in a murder.
    By not compromising her moral and legal beliefs, no matter how justified this act of vigilantism would be, she made the choice to be one of the few characters in the show to remain “uncorrupted” by Tony Soprano’s presence in her life.

    • @JuanMartinez-tr8ww
      @JuanMartinez-tr8ww Před 7 měsíci +11

      Beautifully put 👏

    • @circleinforthecube5170
      @circleinforthecube5170 Před 5 měsíci

      i imagine its like a drug addiction, you only get a little involved with the mob, say a loan or a scam or a favor and you think your out for good and then you get pulled in like a black hole
      everything the mob does out of good will has a secret debt attached

    • @Whiteboykun
      @Whiteboykun Před 5 měsíci +18

      That's it, this is the comment. A 13 minute video reduced to 30 seconds.

    • @kemowasabi551
      @kemowasabi551 Před 5 měsíci +3

      She probably allowed her attacker to do it again - She'll have to live with that too.

    • @alnibodycare
      @alnibodycare Před 5 měsíci +24

      @@kemowasabi551the only person responsible for her attack and any potential others is the rapist and the legal system for letting him go. Stop blaming victims. It’s not on victims to be traumatized again and blamed and shamed. She also actually did try to go to the police and the legal system failed her. Blame the rapist, not victims.

  • @woahblackbetty7691
    @woahblackbetty7691 Před rokem +405

    How cool would it have been if Melfi said "No... Ill take care of it myself" then repeatedly drives over the employee of the month until he is a shopping cart.

    • @Italian69Boi
      @Italian69Boi Před rokem +41

      then she put it in drive 🤣🤣🤣

    • @mr.patriotjol
      @mr.patriotjol Před rokem +1

      She would’ve been made right there and then

    • @tedwojtasik8781
      @tedwojtasik8781 Před rokem +19

      It's not her fault...it slipped outta gear 🙂

    • @Joeypeeps-le3xw
      @Joeypeeps-le3xw Před 7 měsíci +6

      Or whatever happened there...

    • @scottholt69ify
      @scottholt69ify Před 7 měsíci +1

      Because Tony would kill him and she didn't want him to.

  • @thomasdahlquist7119
    @thomasdahlquist7119 Před 8 měsíci +80

    My favorite line from the series, delivered by Dr Melfi:
    "If I wanted him crushed like a bug, I could do it."

    • @TRINZINI
      @TRINZINI Před 2 měsíci +8

      Reminds me of the line in SCHINDLER'S LIST where Schindler tells Amon Goeth : "Power is when we have every justification to kill, and we don't."

    • @manuelmoran9554
      @manuelmoran9554 Před 2 měsíci

      But she COULDN'T

    • @Joplas99
      @Joplas99 Před měsícem

      ​@@manuelmoran9554but she DID EEEENT

  • @BookshelfQBattler
    @BookshelfQBattler Před 7 měsíci +83

    Unfortunate she didn’t know Furio. Furio probably would’ve done it out of chivalry without expecting a quid pro quo.

    • @jonothandoeser
      @jonothandoeser Před 3 měsíci +2

      People should never seek revenge.

    • @ReadtheBible7777
      @ReadtheBible7777 Před 2 měsíci +1

      @@jonothandoeserJustice is the Lords.

    • @TC8787-yq7og
      @TC8787-yq7og Před 2 měsíci

      Mr Williams was a gentleman

    • @NG..
      @NG.. Před 2 měsíci +3

      @@jonothandoesernever say never 😂

    • @surette2012
      @surette2012 Před 2 měsíci +1

      @@jonothandoeserI think it’s more of a safety issue for the public. This situation is beyond her. A man sa’ed her and is walking the street and is a potential repeat offender. Other people are in danger with rapists free. I get when the mob steps in they just whack them, so it’s definitely fuelled by some kinda intense emotional response and perhaps revenge by proxy. If they could incriminate him and get the law to put him away for life is ideal, but we don’t live in an ideal world, sadly.
      This isn’t some petty revenge fantasy of getting back at some kid who bullied you a decade ago. This is about a creep in sheep’s clothing hurting and traumatizing people.

  • @TrishD33LGK
    @TrishD33LGK Před rokem +214

    This was such a fantastic show. And, the loss of James Gandolfini was a huge loss for us all. He was an incredible actor.

    • @_JesusIsLord_
      @_JesusIsLord_ Před 2 měsíci +2

      This and the wire are my favorite shows and have yet to be beaten. Oh the shield is also a guilty favorite. Breaking Bad was good but sometimes the pacing just killed me.

  • @JjjL3
    @JjjL3 Před 9 měsíci +32

    This show really had us begging tony to rip a dude apart😭

  • @GepsenLuv
    @GepsenLuv Před 8 měsíci +104

    Excellent analysis. Even in Melfi's darkest hour, she found the strength to reject the ultimate deal with the devil. Powerful. Both metaphorically and literally.

  • @HOTD108_
    @HOTD108_ Před rokem +297

    The dream sequences in The Sopranos feel so unbelievable accurate to how real life dreams feel. As much as I love the more outlandish approach to dreams seen in stuff like Twin Peaks, the realism in of the dreams in The Sopranos is just completely unmatched.

    • @Void7.4.14
      @Void7.4.14 Před rokem +10

      Facts. My favorite part is that Chase and others have said that some of the dreams have a lotta meaning and symbolism while others have none at all but they never really say which is which lol
      I've seen some people say they hated the dream sequences, those people can't be helped I don't think 😂

    • @jeremyv4636
      @jeremyv4636 Před rokem +4

      Couldn't agree more; the dream sequences are INCREDIBLE in Sopranos and are so damn vivid

    • @xxdomoxxkunxx
      @xxdomoxxkunxx Před rokem +4

      I've had seizures while I sleep and it results in some of the most intense, dark shit you can imagine
      I've had dreams where I'm being crucified and thousands of years go by and then I wake up to "yeah I was about to call 911 you were having a seizure in your sleep"

    • @tedwojtasik8781
      @tedwojtasik8781 Před rokem +7

      @@Void7.4.14 For me the dreams with symbolism are easy to spot once you know what to look for. Tony's dream while in a coma is a perfect example of that. Symbolism all over the place, from being in San Diego (maybe I would be selling patio furniture in San Diego), the lighthouse, how he gradually loses his NJ accent as the episode progresses, to his inability to seal the deal with the woman from the bar, getting slapped by the monk. BTW the monks are a MAJOR symbol regarding choice in Tony's life. That whole dream sequence was brilliant. Another such sequence was where Tony is in the car with Ralphie who is bald and has first a caterpillar, then a butterfly on his head.

    • @mohammedu7105
      @mohammedu7105 Před 11 měsíci +3

      That surreal feeling in melfi's dream felt so.. accurate. Everything felt just looked and felt a bit.. off.

  • @OpalLeigh
    @OpalLeigh Před 6 měsíci +19

    I feel like this moment with Melfi was the most perfect example of “when fighting monsters, make sure you do not become a monster yourself”.

  • @robertomercado5478
    @robertomercado5478 Před 7 měsíci +54

    The ending of episode plays on the silence of victims. Also Melfi understood Tony would have leverage over her. Tony would kill him. Though Tony is repugnant character, any pushback from melfi during their session Tony would have twinkle in his eye. He would be dealing with someone with compromised morals. He would point out melfi shouldn’t be speaking from a high horse.

  • @KittySnicker
    @KittySnicker Před 8 měsíci +16

    That dream she had with the Rottweiler symbolizing Tony was so powerful and ethereal

  • @craigroberts6439
    @craigroberts6439 Před rokem +40

    Everyone in the TV audience wanted so badly for her to tell Tony. The attacker’s
    fate would have been a thing of beauty to watch.

    • @TRINZINI
      @TRINZINI Před 2 měsíci +2

      Actually, I love it even more when the horrible fate is SUGGESTED instead of shown (as in the clip above, when the french con guy opens the door and comes face to face with Furio's intense stare and then ... CUT !! It's both scary and hilarious ! (reminds me of the last shot in Friedkin's SORCERER)

  • @mariyatakeuchi9009
    @mariyatakeuchi9009 Před rokem +111

    if she told tony he would never have let her live it down
    could you imagine all the times t hit on melfie and got upset he got rejected? could you imagine if he dangeld that over and over again

  • @kciN1221
    @kciN1221 Před 6 měsíci +126

    So many shady and disturbing things happened on this show but what happened to her was and still is one of the most heartbreaking and infuriating scenes in the whole series and beyond.

    • @Rorschachqp
      @Rorschachqp Před 5 měsíci +7

      Really? She endured and stayed 100% true to her principles. That’s why she was so happy that moment. It’s kinda like when Galadriel was near the one ring and it gave her the fantasy of being an all powerful being of her own choosing. But when she was able to resist, she was very happy with herself.

    • @KangwithoutaKangdom
      @KangwithoutaKangdom Před 5 měsíci +10

      ​@@Rorschachqpthat doesn't take away what she endured

    • @Rorschachqp
      @Rorschachqp Před 5 měsíci +3

      @@KangwithoutaKangdom No not at all and quite the opposite. She endured a lot from a whole bunch of men (rapist, police failures, ineffectual significant other, resisting using Tony) and came out on top. And she knew it. The more she endured, the greater the victory within. But that is an event of joy, not sadness, in the end. Why frame her strength in victimhood when we can celebrate her triumph?

    • @cervix7667
      @cervix7667 Před 5 měsíci

      simp

    • @LordDarshdan
      @LordDarshdan Před 5 měsíci

      @@Rorschachqp if you think helping a mob boss justify the horrible actions he takes in his criminal enterprise day to day is her enduring then I got nothing more to say....

  • @fearlessjoebanzai
    @fearlessjoebanzai Před 7 měsíci +95

    Before I watch your analysis, I would say that Melfi didn't reveal the guy to Tony because it gave her back her power. Knowing that she holds the information that would decide the perps. fate, yet chooses to be "good", empowers her spiritually, morally and righteously in a way that exacting revenge will never do.

  • @Maw0
    @Maw0 Před rokem +85

    I gotta love how we actually developed Melfi's character so we know her own thoughts outside of her practice and we actually got to know Melfi as a person and how her sessions with Tony were affecting her. Kudos to Lorraine Bracco and kudos to the writers!

  • @godfather4377
    @godfather4377 Před rokem +18

    Melfi was my favorite character. Lorraine Bracco played this role so well.

  • @Sadpanda82
    @Sadpanda82 Před 8 měsíci +80

    Melfi has principles and integrity. She can bare the burden of what happened without involving Tony. She knows what he is, and she knows that asking him would come with a price. Shes stronger than all of them.

    • @Resanctify
      @Resanctify Před 7 měsíci +15

      She's an idiot because while she partly doesn't say anything to help and keep helping Tony in the same capacity, she also did it because she thinks she is better than Tony.
      Not only would she have something done to her assaulter if she could, she is letting that psychopath keep assaulting and maybe killing innocent women. The only good part of organized crime is that they sometimes correct things the justice system failed.

    • @Kromsmitesyou
      @Kromsmitesyou Před 7 měsíci +7

      Tony wouldn't have asked for anything, and that piece of garbage was still on the streets. There is all kinds of justice in this world.

    • @notsoberoveranalyzer8264
      @notsoberoveranalyzer8264 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@ResanctifyShe is better than them lol. She is playing by the rules, that we as a collective have agreed on.
      Yes, it’s sucks at times, and thankfully it’s always changing/improving.
      It sucks, but that’s what it is to be responsible.
      And don’t get me wrong - I genuinely feel in debt to those who willingly take more prison time, for “taking out the trash” ( guys in prison and/or jail - who torture/straight up kill serial killers, CP, rapists etc) as the courts & Society fails far too often.

    • @Resanctify
      @Resanctify Před 7 měsíci +4

      @@notsoberoveranalyzer8264 She is not better than them at all because of what you glossed over, Vanity and Pride. Women and psychologists usually think themselves above the men and women they are more attractive than. Also, you seem to be going on an assumption that there is someone purely virtuous in a written drama, this isn't an anime or "gods not dead" type movie.

    • @oneproudbrowncoat
      @oneproudbrowncoat Před 7 měsíci

      ​@@notsoberoveranalyzer8264We have collectively agreed upon that, at all. If that were the case, someone like Tony (or his compatriots) wouldn't exist.

  • @sputnikalgrim
    @sputnikalgrim Před 7 měsíci +49

    This is a testament to the writers. It would’ve been so easy for them to have Tony be the hero, we all wanted that to be the case, but as much as we all route for him in the show he’s never the good guy, he’s always a bad guy… maybe our favorite bad guy but a bad guy. They represented her as a strong woman, ethically and morally. It’s clear she desired justice, knowing real justice wouldn’t be provided by the justice system and she denied herself that.

  • @PurpleDragonz55
    @PurpleDragonz55 Před rokem +103

    I think the scary part is we wanted tony to do what is causing his pain and others even though it is wrong it’s the one thing we wanted from tony. And we didn’t get it. Stirrs up interesting, conflicting feelings we should all confront and question.

    • @WowLynchWow
      @WowLynchWow  Před rokem +10

      Agreed 100%.

    • @SinclairSan
      @SinclairSan Před 11 měsíci +2

      @@WowLynchWow is that all you say

    • @bigvinnie3
      @bigvinnie3 Před 9 měsíci +4

      That's an interesting theory. The murders are a big part of what hurts tony and we want him to put another notch in his soul for revenge. A lot of this foucuses on milfis feelings for good reason. But it's interesting to think how it would affect tony. In the short term i don't think it would affect him much other than convincing him he's a good guy but long term IDK.

    • @ContactsNfilters
      @ContactsNfilters Před 8 měsíci +2

      If you haven't ever read Ettie Hillesum's writings, they are fascinating and cover the same subject.
      " And, after being yelled at and threatened by a Gestapo agent: “I am not easily frightened. Not because I am brave but because I know that I am dealing with human beings and that I must try as hard as I can to understand everything that anyone ever does. And that was the real import of this morning: not that a disgruntled young Gestapo officer yelled at me, but that I felt no indignation, rather a real compassion, and would have liked to ask: ‘Did you have a very unhappy childhood, has your girlfriend let you down?’” (102). "

    • @zavenpapyan426
      @zavenpapyan426 Před 8 měsíci +1

      O!!@@SinclairSan

  • @slamontster
    @slamontster Před rokem +60

    Melfi telling Tony, and then getting deeply wrapped up in his world, sounds like something from a different show. It makes me think of Breaking Bad, when certain characters learn a secret and it completely changes them. Dramatic and interesting for sure but just not the style of the show. The Sopranos characters are all set in their ways, for better or worse

  • @sudstahgaming
    @sudstahgaming Před rokem +58

    She didn't want the moral guilt of condoning what he does, if she told him she would be condoning what he does and breaking her moral compass because she knew what he would do to the guy, shes essentially raising above her own feelings and emotions into a higher selfless spiritual level.

    • @watitduful
      @watitduful Před 10 měsíci +1

      Spot on. If she ran with that she’d, in principle, be a hypocrite.

    • @raynmanshorts9275
      @raynmanshorts9275 Před 7 měsíci +4

      Except that "higher, selfless spiritual level" now has to contend with the fact that she let a rapist go, and rapists are most commonly serial rapists.

    • @sudstahgaming
      @sudstahgaming Před 7 měsíci

      @raynmanshorts9275 also a valid point, she could have gone to the police, but to her I suppose it was the worry of feeling like a murderer telling Tony.

    • @raynmanshorts9275
      @raynmanshorts9275 Před 7 měsíci +5

      @@sudstahgaming She _did_ go to the police. They screwed it up by mishandling evidence.

  • @theguitardude5613
    @theguitardude5613 Před 5 měsíci +4

    Melfi proved that she was incorruptible..

  • @jimiewilliams7623
    @jimiewilliams7623 Před rokem +7

    I never thought that she would tell Tony. That would have taken the show and their sessions, in an awkward and arduous direction. I love that she kept her mouth shut.

  • @TotalTech2.
    @TotalTech2. Před 7 měsíci +22

    The reason she didn't tell Tony is simple
    She already *KNEW* that she was crossing ethical lines with Tony and telling him would not only be unprofessional but result in his death. If she told Tony and Tony killed the guy he would have leverage and power over her. She would NEVER be able to escape the grasp of Tony. Her revenge simply wasn't worth being forever in debt to someone as *evil* as Tony.
    By telling him all she is really doing is trading one psychopath for another. However Tony is worse because unlike the other guy Tony has a massive amount of resources, is even more brutal and she wouldn't be able to get rid of him

    • @mikeg2491
      @mikeg2491 Před 7 měsíci +2

      once you’re in there is no getting out

    • @basedbrit4206
      @basedbrit4206 Před 4 měsíci

      ​@@mikeg2491Either she's an idiot or she enjoyed it because she just let him take more victims

  • @dinglbarry1275
    @dinglbarry1275 Před rokem +45

    Great breakdown! In a lessor quality show, Melfi would have told Tony (even though of course the audience wants Melfi to tell Tony). This really was Melfi's defining moment. It's interesting to play out what Melfi's character arc may have been had she told Tony. At that point she sort of would become an unofficial member of team mafia (a mafia friend). It's possible this could have led to a willing romantic relationship with Tony. The thing Tony would have over Melfi is that she's essentially a complicit member of any illegal activities from there on out... he would certainly be a lot more prone to reveal to her at least some of his daily activities. Melfi could possibly even rationalize those activities through incrementalism.

  • @daviddanielsson3643
    @daviddanielsson3643 Před rokem +29

    I was like 13 years old when I first saw this episode, so I guess I couldn't see the deeper meaning of Melfi's "No". I was like: "What? Why didn't she tell him so the final scene could be of Tony and the guys torturing that scumbag to death?" I was deeply disappointed, but like I said - I was 13.

    • @johnherbert1431
      @johnherbert1431 Před rokem

      I'm 24, and I'm still disappointed I didn't get to see Tone fuck that guy like he did Melfi on the stairs

    • @youknowwhoyouare2269
      @youknowwhoyouare2269 Před rokem

      ?????????@@batgurrl ?????????
      Research for a Melfi in your area covered under your insurance

    • @Housesider
      @Housesider Před rokem +1

      @@batgurrl How would a 13 year not 'understand' what it's like? Children get sexually assaulted every day, as terrible of a statement as that is, it's the truth. Predators don't always have limits to their depravity.

    • @Housesider
      @Housesider Před rokem

      @@batgurrl You have a fairly sheltered view of teens of that era then lol. It doesn't matter that "most" 13 years haven't been raped, as that is an absurd statement and doesn't need to be true. You said a 13 year old *wouldn't* understand, as if it were impossible, when that is far and away not true. A kid doesn't need to have personally experienced a long boring marriage to comprehend why and how it would wear on the mental psyches of adults. You're greatly underselling the intelligence potential for teens. When I was that age I was already watching a lot of psychological thrillers and it was my favorite genre (still is) because it forced you to think to understand what was happening. Not all children are brainlets lol

    • @globalchaos1984
      @globalchaos1984 Před rokem +10

      @@Housesider he's talking about not understanding Melfi not telling Tony about the attack not the inability to understand the attack itself.

  • @jaynehogue2459
    @jaynehogue2459 Před 7 měsíci +14

    She understood the difference between justice and revenge. Telling Tony is revenge not justice

  • @toneriggz
    @toneriggz Před rokem +94

    She would lose all moral high ground if she told Tony what happened. Even if the guy deserved it, even if Melfi really desired it, she would become a criminal just like Tony. She also secretly desires Tony but that’s another line that she can’t cross. Her worst sin is keeping Tony on as a patient for as long as she did. She’s kind of like the priest in that she wants a whiff of something that she can’t have.

    • @Ambers3rdFupaRoll
      @Ambers3rdFupaRoll Před 8 měsíci +8

      Nah i dont see it like that at all. The real criminals are the ones who failed to get her justice. Anything that happens after that is just and justified.

    • @toneriggz
      @toneriggz Před 8 měsíci +9

      @@Ambers3rdFupaRoll Justice and vengeance aren’t quite the same. I understand that having Rossi pay with his life sounds like justice but it would also mean that Melfi has entered the gangster world. She would no longer be innocent, no longer be a civilian. The fact that she didn’t tell Tony what happened means that she ultimately values that more than getting revenge.

    • @JSon-yl1ty
      @JSon-yl1ty Před 8 měsíci +1

      Her ex husband could have given him a beating.

    • @ToMaToEsGrOw
      @ToMaToEsGrOw Před 7 měsíci +1

      She's the victoria secret type.

    • @WrongStanceProductions
      @WrongStanceProductions Před 7 měsíci

      She's not interested in him sexually

  • @ChicanoPridex08
    @ChicanoPridex08 Před 6 měsíci +6

    Tony would of held this "act of vengeance" over her head for life. Every disagreement he would mention this. That's another reason she couldn't break her code for revenge.

  • @billthecat666
    @billthecat666 Před 7 měsíci +4

    I was impressed at her strength.

  • @Thestray187
    @Thestray187 Před 2 měsíci +3

    That scene was done so well and she going against the grain was incredibly done by her and played off by tony was done perfectly. The show was written very well and done by the characters very well

  • @heccyb521
    @heccyb521 Před rokem +41

    i just watched this episode last night. If that doctor/patient threshold is breached, it will never return and will only end in one or both of their demise. what an excellent, excellent storyline this was.

  • @ericgoldfarb4870
    @ericgoldfarb4870 Před 6 měsíci +4

    That "no" was so powerful

  • @isabelbeckerman9226
    @isabelbeckerman9226 Před rokem +38

    I believe Melfi didn't want to confess to Tony the horrific rape experience because, as a doctor, it would be unethical to arrange with Tony, knowing he was a mafioso, to have the attacker clipped, even though she had definite retributions of making the rapist pay dearly for his offense. If she told him, God Almighty, Tony would not waste a single moment of having him dismembered in pieces and left inside a garbage bag.

  • @deebrown4536
    @deebrown4536 Před 2 měsíci +3

    The only time ave ever shouted at my tv when he asked you wanna say something “FUCKING TELL HIM”

  • @chrisc4208
    @chrisc4208 Před 5 měsíci +5

    The way she said no was also empowering because she was able to keep herself and not lose herself because of what happened. Even after that horrible attack against her she was still strong and even unwavering in the face of her temptation. I don’t want her to tell him on a rewatch. I’m proud of her and I would do anything to aid her in her recovery as she chose to recover.

    • @basedbrit4206
      @basedbrit4206 Před 4 měsíci

      Either she's an idiot or she enjoyed it because she just let him take more victims

  • @tatianamaldonado5624
    @tatianamaldonado5624 Před 7 měsíci +11

    I think the satisfaction of being able to tell Tony if she wanted to was enough for her. That mixed with her ability to keep her hands and conscience clean. Obviously she didn’t want to be indebted to him, she of all people knows how he works, she knows he’s a narcissist that will come to collect, and turn on her

    • @basedbrit4206
      @basedbrit4206 Před 4 měsíci

      Either she's an idiot or she enjoyed it because she just let him take more victims

  • @suprcrzy
    @suprcrzy Před 7 měsíci

    The last few mins of this video were beautifully put together! Well done

  • @seeyeah5172
    @seeyeah5172 Před 7 měsíci +4

    I really loved how dr melfi knew Tony would've taken care of the perp had she told him. It was so touching to see Tony genuinely concerned and ready to take action. I wish she would've told him though

  • @laurentsamson8927
    @laurentsamson8927 Před rokem +7

    You made me feel these scenes more intensively than when I saw the originals. Thank you

  • @Djm8520
    @Djm8520 Před 5 měsíci +5

    This was the kind of thing that made The Sopranos the best ever. They didn’t cave to popular opinion and easy Hollywood choices. They weren’t making a Western! (Thank you, Junior). Instead, they made a much tougher moral decision. Melfi was content knowing she could have the rapist squashed like a bug. It gave her back the power in the scenario.

  • @Dan-zq5wt
    @Dan-zq5wt Před 7 měsíci +4

    Brilliant. This show was the deepest study of morality and free will ever written for television.

  • @franklaudicina9786
    @franklaudicina9786 Před rokem +9

    I absolutely love and appreciate your analysis Rummy. Thank you

  • @uncjim
    @uncjim Před 7 měsíci

    Very well done! Melfi saw Tony as her patient and that doctor/patient relationship wasn’t to be disturbed. It still hurts.

  • @macwyll
    @macwyll Před měsícem +1

    Awww man! Thanks for this video. I hadn't considered any of this and it makes so much sense. Bravo!

  • @Housesider
    @Housesider Před rokem +17

    Incredible analysis my man. I found your channel because of the David Lynch videos but your Sopranos vids are just as good. Sopranos is one of those ultra-popular shows which actually lives up to the hype, a rarity. It's really well-executed how this entire dynamic between Melfi and Tony completely reaffirms the audience to the fact that just because Tony is the protagonist, it doesn't mean he's remotely good, or even redeemable. He just happens to be one out of many shitbags that the story is following directly. In a weird way however, if Tony found out on his own, I believe he absolutely would've made that Employee of the Month trashbag regret even being born, and without the implicit carrot-dangling Tony would've had over her if she'd told him directly.

  • @mattmcnulty8131
    @mattmcnulty8131 Před 7 měsíci +5

    We used to have sopranos parties every Sunday night and everyone knew she wouldn’t go through with it but we were all disappointed when she said no. Everyone hates a rapist.

  • @ncstonecrew
    @ncstonecrew Před 7 měsíci +2

    Very well narrated.👍

  • @brandothecatmeow
    @brandothecatmeow Před 6 měsíci +3

    As one of the biggest Sopranos fans of all time, I still cannot bring myself to rewatch the series because of Gandolfini being gone. I will eventually get there

  • @GriffinatorOriginal
    @GriffinatorOriginal Před 10 měsíci +6

    I was frustrated as hell when I first watched this episode over a decade ago. Professionally and morally she made the right call. But I still wish Tony had found out at some point and did something to the guy lol

  • @anthony-e8058
    @anthony-e8058 Před rokem +6

    Great video Rummy! Just wondering, why you haven’t done a video on Phil turning into a house?

  • @positivepsycho2932
    @positivepsycho2932 Před 7 měsíci

    I've only seen the series once. But I'm going to rewatch soon. I love videos like this, dissecting episodes. Gives me a different perspective on things.

  • @chichibangbang3667
    @chichibangbang3667 Před 7 měsíci

    Very well put together

  • @purge2--u--nite342
    @purge2--u--nite342 Před rokem +38

    This series is timeless. Still relevant now and relates to society. Watch it every year and catch new things, overlooked..... Mayonnaise, mayonnaise

    • @lowandodor1150
      @lowandodor1150 Před rokem

      Damn, i wish i knew what Mayonnaise, Mayonnaise is in reference to, if it is....

    • @youknowwhoyouare2269
      @youknowwhoyouare2269 Před rokem +2

      That white stuff on your lips
      Don't panic, it's organic @@lowandodor1150

    • @Italian69Boi
      @Italian69Boi Před rokem

      🤣🤣🤣🤣😝😝😝

    • @Italian69Boi
      @Italian69Boi Před rokem +6

      @@lowandodor1150 in pine barrens episode when they all driving back.
      Paulie started whole ordeal for no reason with the russian so after he eats the sandwiches Tony and Bobby brought, he looks extra incompetent by getting mayo all over his side of mouth showing Tony that Paulie is a liability and he freaks out shouting at Paulie "Mayonnaise Mayonnaise!" while pointing to side of mouth

    • @lowandodor1150
      @lowandodor1150 Před rokem +1

      @@Italian69Boi Yeah i know the scene i just thought there is something deeper to it, i get that part though. Just thought, since he pointed out the overlooking part....thank you though!

  • @milolll
    @milolll Před rokem +10

    Revenge is always one's own burden.

  • @judeannethecandorchannel2153

    Excellent video!!

  • @PaulClipMaster
    @PaulClipMaster Před 7 měsíci +1

    Great analysis!

  • @bautistamolinari
    @bautistamolinari Před rokem +10

    I've watched most of the show from youtube clips so there's no much sorprise for me now that I'm on a marathon but Melfi getting attacked was a shock. The whole episode I was hoping for Tony to find out but interesting enough, not from Melfi. If there's something that the sopranos gets right it's their characters and personalities, they"re real people with unique values, mistakes, etc and Melfi not telling Tony and leaving us with this bitter ending is amazing, she's been through hell and had the devil's life in her hands but still stuck to her moral and didn't change her whole arc just for fan service

  • @l0ufromdaBX
    @l0ufromdaBX Před 2 měsíci +3

    You know… all these years I just thought she didn’t tell Tony because she knew he would kill him and didn’t want that man’s death on her conscience. I didn’t even think about the fact that eventually after Tony got what he wanted out of her he would have used her up and spit her out. That a fucking genius point. 😮

    • @th3azscorpio
      @th3azscorpio Před měsícem +1

      Tony is a narcissistic sociopath. The hell he brings to others would eventually come her way, the second he needs something, or she falls out of line.

  • @lisastuart5911
    @lisastuart5911 Před 3 měsíci +2

    I wanted Tony to find out so very badly.

  • @MG-ol8hs
    @MG-ol8hs Před 7 měsíci +3

    i think it was control. She had no control when her attacker violated her. and if she told tony she'd have no control over what he would do to him. This way she is master of her own destiny. a strong woman.

  • @josephallsen3135
    @josephallsen3135 Před rokem +13

    I have a fan fiction tangent that I thought about for years. What if Dr. Melfi's son, Jason or her ex told Tony about the rape? Tony takes revenge for her. The rapist gets kill in spite of Dr. Melfi's stand. I thought there could be some interesting storylines, topics and issues explored.

    • @themadtitan7603
      @themadtitan7603 Před 8 měsíci

      I think it would've opened up an interesting storyline for Melfi in the next season if the 'employee of the month' ultimately got his due. Not as Jen getting her revenge, but Tony finding out through an external source. Leading to the scenario that Melfi tried to avoid in the first place unravelling out of her control.

    • @davidcox3076
      @davidcox3076 Před 5 měsíci

      I like that story line. It would even better if Tony made it look like an accident. And she wasn't able to figure out that it was really a hit, even if she suspected. Everyone around her would know the truth but her.

  • @justinsellers9402
    @justinsellers9402 Před měsícem

    Keeping silent was an amazing act of courage and mercy.

  • @abztraktt6403
    @abztraktt6403 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Dude your commentary is fking A1! SUBBED.

  • @BiohazardBunney
    @BiohazardBunney Před 7 měsíci +3

    I get why she did it. But it would have been so satisfying to see Tony get her revenge mob style

  • @gearoidwalsh8606
    @gearoidwalsh8606 Před 7 měsíci +27

    This is very interesting. Especially as Melfi represents the fulcrum between definite moral judgement and what her husband called "cheesy" moral relativism. When she was tested in this case, she passed, taking a great cost to herself. However she also spent years treating Tony and occasionally rationalizing that he could be helped, rather than looking at the more likely scenario of Tony weaponizing the support for his way of life (she eventually judged this and confronted him in the final series - ironically he called her "immoral" for being very unambiguously moral - putting all his own wrongdoing off on her). Maybe this is part of what the vending machine represents in her dream. Consumer capitalism and the "American Dream" demands for cultural and economic reasons that she engages in the murky moral domain of trying to improve the psychological health of a career criminal - this represents a trap, and it's fair to say that it led to the circumstances of her rape. She knows better that real psychotherapy must have a moral dimension.

    • @jaclynxo
      @jaclynxo Před 5 měsíci

      Great points. His transference is expected in that setting and she is under so many moral and ethical oaths, particularly professionally, that it showed she was truly incredible at her job. Clinicians go through a ton of steps to get to that point and the good ones hold their boundaries. Great writing!

    • @th3azscorpio
      @th3azscorpio Před měsícem

      How did it lead to her rape?

  • @FuruThaGuru
    @FuruThaGuru Před 9 měsíci +1

    Lynch, Please do some more analysis on this show, your commentary is amazing

  • @vietnamsemonky4082
    @vietnamsemonky4082 Před 5 měsíci +1

    Rummy! Fancy seeing that you enjoy talking about the sopranos as well as boxing! Keep up the great content brother!

  • @bigguy7353
    @bigguy7353 Před 5 měsíci +3

    It's pretty simple...... she knew that if she asked Tony for a favor, she owed him. She would then be irreversibly in that life. She made the right decision.

    • @basedbrit4206
      @basedbrit4206 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Either she's an idiot or she enjoyed it because she just let him take more victims, literally allowed a rapist to take more victims with 0 consequences

  • @heidis.3722
    @heidis.3722 Před 7 měsíci +4

    I really wanted him to find out on his own. I get her not telling him, but it would be sweet if he found out on his own.

  • @frankmarx8997
    @frankmarx8997 Před rokem +1

    Very insightful

  • @Fotosynthesis858
    @Fotosynthesis858 Před 2 měsíci +2

    “She could’ve told Tony, but she did’dant” 😂 Nod to when Chrissy was high on smack 😂😂😂

  • @YoutuberRick18363
    @YoutuberRick18363 Před 2 měsíci +4

    Nothing good ever comes from owing the Mafia a favor.

  • @sabrinashelton1997
    @sabrinashelton1997 Před rokem +14

    Is it possible she could have just told him what happened to her without asking him for a "favor" so to speak, therefore she wouldn't really be indebted to him? I always thought that if she told just him what happened, he would have the guy attacked/killed out of some sort of care for her or chivalry. I guess I never imagined the scenario that he would have expected her to pay him back.

    • @bigvinnie3
      @bigvinnie3 Před 9 měsíci +3

      They both know what he would do so i dont think playing naive would work for her. Maybe it would in a legal sense but not a tony sense. I don't think she'd be indebted to him perse but she'd never be able to drop him as a patient or he'd hold it over her head.

  • @gemmalfirefly4287
    @gemmalfirefly4287 Před 6 měsíci +2

    Sometimes it takes a psychopath to take down a psychopath

  • @melissae1116
    @melissae1116 Před 7 měsíci

    Good analysis.

  • @carlyonbay45
    @carlyonbay45 Před 7 měsíci +3

    I was kinda willing her to tell him …. But Im glad she didn’t - as she kept her professional integrity …… plus she would have been in Tony’s debt

  • @RealVladSneed3
    @RealVladSneed3 Před 8 měsíci +7

    Or think about it like this. What if that “service” Tony had asked had been something like “ How about you give me a list of all your patients names?” Knowing that her patients are vulnerable people in a prime position to extort or rob. If you think of it like that, Melfi’s choice could have had negative consequences for a lot more people than just her.

    • @stevens1041
      @stevens1041 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Great point. There is never something for nothing, with people like Tony.

    • @basedbrit4206
      @basedbrit4206 Před 4 měsíci

      Either she's an idiot or she enjoyed it because she just let him take more victims, literally allowed a rapist to take more victims with 0 consequences

  • @erichodge567
    @erichodge567 Před 6 měsíci +2

    This was one of the greatest TV episodes ever.

  • @jenniferdaniels2413
    @jenniferdaniels2413 Před 7 měsíci +3

    Ooooh, this is good commentary! Makes Melfi look less like a selfless angel and more like even her refusal to reveal the secret was about HER, not about the greater good. I think if she had told, she wouldn't have been much better than him.

  • @ZennyReacts
    @ZennyReacts Před 5 měsíci +3

    Even when you know the whole Philosphy and morality behind why she didn’t tell him. I’m still screaming for her to tell him in that last scene 😂

  • @tomallen5837
    @tomallen5837 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Thank you Ray, for coming back from the woods stalking bears, to narrate this wonderful reflection.

  • @tjm8128
    @tjm8128 Před 2 měsíci +2

    Omg “but she didennnt”😂😂😂 that was gold.

  • @eddiebeale
    @eddiebeale Před 9 měsíci +3

    Perfect ending to a perfect episode.

  • @ChristopherMitchell-qi9fn
    @ChristopherMitchell-qi9fn Před 7 měsíci +6

    Fun fact the actor who played the rapist is in real life was heroic. He was a firefighter.

  • @tonyscott658
    @tonyscott658 Před 5 měsíci +2

    She is the strong silent type Tony was always talking about Gary Cooper

  • @jaredmessinese4688
    @jaredmessinese4688 Před 4 měsíci +1

    The episode ending like that gave me chills

  • @jamesdooling4139
    @jamesdooling4139 Před 7 měsíci +3

    I wanted so much for Jenn to unleash the hounds, but in the end, that's what kept her one of the few characters without succumbing to the world she was surrounded by.

  • @chadsworthgigafuck
    @chadsworthgigafuck Před 7 měsíci +2

    Melfi had the most integrity out of everyone in the show. Genuinely someone wrestling with her morals and winning.

  • @BlahKDubstep
    @BlahKDubstep Před 9 měsíci +4

    She knew what he was capable of. I do think that stairway scene was a rough watch though. I hated it honesty

  • @CmdrSoup
    @CmdrSoup Před 5 měsíci +2

    She looked at the abyss and stood on her feet. The best of the episode is that it made thr audience to look at the abyss too

  • @noellecox3952
    @noellecox3952 Před 11 měsíci

    Fantastic episode to watch two brilliant actors in this scene it was powerful to watch and a brilliant script

  • @tedwojtasik8781
    @tedwojtasik8781 Před rokem +7

    and therein lay the difference between Melfi and the degenerates Tony has under his thumb. Melfi is not a degenerate, she can control herself to a point and has clear limits which she does cross from time to time. However, ultimately she is a good person who has not been consumed by her desires or weaknesses like the others. The people Tony owns and then destroys are all, well, their own worse enemies. The fact is, Tony represents conflict, chaos, and the outcomes of bad choices. Melfi represents good, hard working people who have issues, but are still grounded enough to resist the temptations which Tony represents. Tony is Mephistopheles and most people are Dr. Faust, but just like both, they ultimately destroy themselves.

  • @oskarstenlund
    @oskarstenlund Před rokem +5

    Melfi is the viewer. Trying to rehabilitate the mobster. Trying to explain away his overwhelming evil. It eventually reaches a breaking point in se6 when she realizes she isn't doing the right thing, and is frustrated. There is no deeper revelation in Tony, his evil cannot be explained away by trauma. Melfi refusing to tell Tony is the director sayint "look, most people aren't like Tony, they are good".
    Also "social compact" lol