Don’t Be a Flake: Maintaining Friendships as a New Mom
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- čas přidán 6. 11. 2019
- Maintaining friendships as new mom can be hard. In this video, Susan and Sharzad share their experiences with mom friends and flaking. Share your experiences in the comments! Thanks for watching!
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#MomPressures #Flaking
I have the hardest time saying no, but I’ve learned it’s so much better to just say I can’t go or do something. 🙈
Love Susan’s lipstick! I feel like this is your signature red you’ve worn in a few videos and I’ve always wanted to know what lippy it is!! Do you mind sharing? It’s gorgeous on you! ❤️
I think I'm a flake because I felt SO judged and guilty while watching this video. 😂 Love you gals always though, so glad you're getting active on this channel again!
Problem is I am not a flake, because like you said i won’t say I can go if I can’t go. But old friends still think I am a “flake” and I “always say no anyways so we didn’t invite you”... frustrating. No one will understand until you become a parent
"Don't make promises you can't keep."
Great video! Relate, relate, relate!
Even when I was pregnant: You are sick? How dare you!😂
Mom of two here, an infant and a toddler. I have a job with a long commute. The free time that I do have (what is free time?) I use to spend time with my husband, kids, parents, and sister. Outside of those 6 people, it is really hard to schedule time with friends, even friends of mine who recently had kids. Outside of that time, there is cleaning the house, meal prepping, laundry...i hate to say it, but in this phase of life, there is very little time for friends. I used to do a lot of coffee dates in the past. I don’t have the energy right now...this is not permanent but this is my reality right now. Writing this is so therapeutic because I have felt so guilty about this since I first became a mom. Also, I don’t like to make plans because I hate when people flake on me after all the coordinating for child care.
When I became a Mom I really needed to be around other people, and get a little piece of adult time back. The transition from working to staying at home was really hard. People kept flaking on me and I took it really personally. And it definitely played a part in me getting into a deeper depression. spending time with your friends, can be so important to them. Even if it’s just an hour or two. If you have to cancel plans, try and make a plan to do something simple like going to grab coffee or planning your errands together, meet up at target. It could really make a world of difference for someone close to you without you realizing it.
I can't say I have gone flaky, but now in having my 2nd child at 40 years old, I am not as punctual as I was able to be with my first child (9 years ago). Being somewhere on time is a super struggle for me and I find even if I can be somewhere on time, my anxiety is through the roof and I still end up being a tad late. Also, I have always been the "preparer" of foods and treats and hosting dinners, and I've had to except that I don't have the energy right now to do all those things AND be punctual... so scaling back on my commitments for what to bring has definitely been a challenge.
Gorgeous colour on you, Sherzad - both the top and the lipstick
Ok I think I might be flake-ish? 😬 gotta change my ways! We all need a friend like Sharzad who just says it as it is for all of us to stop flaking. 😂😘 love this topic. So real!
Oh I became a total flake after having my first baby! I will readily admit that it. Haha Sharzad you're so right you eventually find more of a balance then a second baby throws it off again. Oh well. :) I've tried to be better about being realistic with what I can and can't do this time around.
Alice Manfrida good for you, you’re family comes first... friends are just a waste of money, time, and energy!
Same here! I did get some balance after the first one but now have a new infant and I’m back to not being able to carve out time for this anymore
I’m having the opposite problem. I’m the first one of my group of friends to have a baby and since then no one seems to want to get together with me in the first place 😔 can’t be flaked on if you never have plans!
Sometimes those friends will just assumed you don't have time for them anymore. They may not be intentionally rude. I suggest you try and organise plans with them that work with your schedule and let them know. Like it's so nice to get a break from mommyhood and just chat etc..
What lipstick is Susan wearing..?
Grace Macias focus woman, this video is not about lipsticks! Now go take care of your child!
BROTHER TN troll alert! 😂
Grace Macias thanks for letting us know you’re a troll! Now move on lady!
SUSAN YR LIPSTICK!! #bomb
I agree flaking sucks but am I guilty of it? Yes. But what’s wrong with taking the baby with! Especially when they’re just tiny, it’s so hard to get away 😔
:)