ONE QUESTION A NARCISSIST ABSOLUTELY CANNOT ANSWER
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- čas přidán 9. 04. 2019
- Narcissists genuinely believe they are "other" in a special sort of way. But what if you challenge them to explain their special status, how would they respond? Psychotherapist Dr. Les Carter poses one question that a narcissist cannot accurately answer...and it exposes
how they live with a false image of self.
Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who lives in Dallas, Tx. Over the past 39 years he has conducted many workshops and over 60,000 counseling sessions.
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Narcissist also steal your ideas and claim them as their own
ChiefJustice Middleton I HATE NARCISSISTIC people I love to expose them to world
Very very true, they have no true creativity or talent, just take others ideas and develop their own identity...
Spot on!!
@@ElmwoodPkILBuschFraudulentexCo And so you should so that other people that come into contact with these souless bastards will be warned. I had to deal with this same shit again today with a relative of mine. Its never ending buddy, take care.
@@mixythedog Thats why we have so many of these parasitical tyrants in the government and higher position in the corporate elite. We are doomed if we dont get rid of these people and fast. They even self sacrifice rhemselves if they cant get what they want.
They can't answer any question that involves taking responsibility or being accountable.
Exactly
So so true my narc accuse me of being controlling when I asked her how I was controlling possibly 20 times she ignored me as if the question wasn't even asked it just went in one ear and out the other
Yeah, like hiliary and O admitted their crimes...
No, they can answer it - in a way that shifts the accountability to someone else.
Their tactics:
- Cut your talking off
- Shout / talk over u
So u can't formulate your thought.
Then they implement thier false facts in your head, an aggressive way to Gaslight.
Time over time u start doubting yourself even around healthy people. You'd stutter when u talk.
Covert Narcissists don’t always rage- but provoke you to rage with their blame shifting, minimising, gaslighting and deflection.
Then they sit back smugly, arms folded across the chest, wryly smiling. Dr. C
And then when I'm pushed to the brink of insanity, I'm told that I need help and that I need to talk to somebody and get on medication. UGH !!!!!!
Yup.
💯💯💯💯💯
I'm in process of leaving one now, unfortunately we live together..This one will try and trigger me and then smirk and say I knew that would push your buttons..I've learned to disengage now..
Victim or hero. Never the villain.
Mine plays like he's both...to strangers
Great analogy
So true!
@@nickeishamorgan7416 ...mine also plays both parts to my closest friends. Unfortunately, for him, it's inevitable that ALL of these people, like myself, at some point... will be deemed unworthy of his time and effort and the need for special recognition/attention/ praise from them will not be enough to outweigh the once intensely craved but now mundane benefits he receives from them and he will become bored and need to find an entirely new group of people to play hero to... but in the end he will eventually expose himself and his true colors to.ANYONE he interacts with on a continued basis.
"I apologize", said no narcissist ever.
My narc..never apologizes and blamesme for anything and Everything! And he tells about our problems but neglects to be honest and ait he s wrong doings as well,I'm the "bad guy" no matter what!
@@gwenflute6073 Sorry to hear that, I know the story. My Mother is one, my Uncle, my Grandmother, my ex-wife. Now trying not to raise my 7 year old daughter to be one. I think she'll be good, she cares too much for other people and their feelings like I do.
LMAO!
Such words don't exist in their dictionary.
Clinton Fischer unless they are being sarcastic
When a narcissist is confronted with truth they yell and scream to shut you down!
Crazy tantrums.
True very true!
In other words the left?
sarah j. Self-care is very important. That said, I find people outside of a situation, in this case the other managers, frequently distance themselves first. You have the right to a safe work environment. I had a narc supervisor. She went out of her way to make me feel like I was the worst employee ever employed. She actually died of breast cancer a few years after I transferred out of her unit.
That is so damn thru !!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't mean to cuss, but. Yeah!!
Narcissists are scared to death that someone will see that they are absolutely weak and broken.
Tess W
A narc friend I was in contact with (until March this year), told me he was broken when I met him. I honestly believes he wants to heal (he was sent to see a psychologist) but genuinely doesn’t understand what’s wrong. He’s been diagnosed with aspergers but I’m not sure now if that’s correct, or he was misdiagnosed or he’s actually aspergers as well as being narcissistic.
He has asked questions related to his own emotions and why he feels certain things. He’s high functioning and academically gifted, so it’s not that he’s stupid or of low IQ. He’s a doctor. He just genuinely doesn’t understand emotions very well.
We are human no one is perfect accepting that makes it easier to reason with others struggles and kindness Trump's judgement 3 fold it's not a competition love isn't about winning it's about understanding of the circumstances and life choices habits mistakes we make sending healing 🙏
Yes the are...I have 1
EVIL
Tess W That’s been my experience with the narcs in my life. They seem not to be able to understand emotions and really at the core are very broken. They are scared of others and have told me at least once about something bad that happened to them when they were little, like being bullied or abused. So they put themselves mentally in a position where everyone is supposed to just see how wonderful they are so that doesn’t happen again. They don’t realize that how they act because of this belief drives others away.
Bumper sticker I saw years ago: "Never forget you're unique. Just like everybody else."
I love it. Reminds me of a line off the children's movie The incredibles.
"Everyone's special"
"Yeah, which is just another way of saying nobody is"
Fr yeah xp
This is an important truth
Leslie Severance my bumper sticker I never forgot was “what if the hokey pokey is what it’s all about” gonna add urs to my list. Thx!!
Leslie Severance Priceless!!
One time I asked my narc brother: Name one person you’ve ever known in your whole life who is better off for having known you. He couldn’t & then didn’t talk to me for 7 years.
Boy, does that say a lot! Dr. C
That was smart , need to try this.
G
Ask him again.
Perdido Atlantic result!!
They’re sooo quick to point out others’ mistakes, defend their positions at any cost no matter how ridiculous the argument. Tell them how bad your day was... trust me, theirs was worse.
For sure... my ex hurt me before and I broke up with him. He hovered I told him you hurt me so badly blah blah and his response was and I crap you not was “Trust me I’m hurting worse”. 🤮 or his “friend “ told him he had had thoughts of killing himself he’s all like well trust me I’ve actually wanted to blah blah trying to one up someone else’s pain ugh 😑
Taurus Girl the worst is wanting to feel validated by them eve though you know how bad they are
JohnDoe I think that’s what a lot of guys called the norm these days. They aren’t very happy people are they. They seem to compare what other people are doing rather than focus on their own relationships. I’m 32 and really concerned about my future with women
Wow his points on interconnectedness is spot on. My ex believed himself so self-sufficient ("we don't need them") but it was his way to isolate me.
Also about bad breath or farting. He never farted in front of me and when I said all sh*t stinks he'd say his smelled like flowers.
So true....its frightening how many are around me at this point...Not for long...This too will change
The quietest time with a narcissist is when they've failed to deliver a result. They actually go mute, then amnesia sets in.
😂
Mute/amnesia until they can think of a name or excuse for blame shifting.
HA. TRUE
Yessss
I kno his weaknesses. .i just start tlkn like him and about him make him go silent everytime. 😂😂
I recently destroyed a narcissist the other day... it was an amazing experience because I constantly was able to see that when they couldn't control me, they were constantly trying to get other people to attack me; and when I confronted them they were sweet... not in the sense of being kind but in the sense of being WEAK and fragile.
I also learned that the best thing that you could possibly do is IGNORE tf outta them and act like they don't exist. They literally cannot function without your attention.
and that was the best thing I learned by myself.
You didn't destroy a narcissist.
@@mitchellschool9950you don't need to. Just protect yourself precious self by ignoring..... Totally 100%
Well done.
My narc is triggered into rage by ANY question.
Yes, mine too. Any questions. Something as simple as when he says he's going to the store..I ask which store in case I need anything...he refuses to tell me and starts raging. I've read that these types of narcs need to feel superior and in control at all times, so if they answer to us, they see it as them lowering themselves to be our equal instead of our superior and they hate that.
But they're such hypocrites! They will ask us lots of questions and expect us to happily answer.
MarissaC I’m sorry to say Marissa that it also means he’s cheating, or he’s preparing the ground to. He’s making sure that you are/will be too frightened to question him. I hope you have left this demon or are making plans to. You deserve a loving human partner.
@@louk6196 Thank you, I'm still in it now but one day I won't be! He is just that bad with anything and everything. He's been strange like this from the start, just very touchy about any way he thinks he's being treated. His health is getting worse and that's also making him act even more awful. And I got with him believing that an older man is more mature and I'd been treated so badly by guys my age.
We have an almost 30 year age gap and it turns out he's more immature than anyone I've ever known!
MarissaC Mine is 22 years older than me. And while I can now see how he manipulated me into thinking he was my soulmate, it has taken me 30 years of confusion and utter misery to find out that he is actually the total opposite. We reaIly are too nice for our own good! I hope you don’t lose so many years of your life to the demon. God Bless and good luck. 💐
@@louk6196 I wouldn't assume they are cheating ( or going to) because they hate to be questioned. It's about control- they are always primed to hear criticism in questions and they can't tolerate that. While many narcs cheat, not all do.
Get rid of them and live in peace.
Some time people just don't want to get rid of us even when we tried our best to save them
Easier said then done.
@@michellecodispoti6203 moving out and into own place is a good first step. Some might have to move out of state if it's bad.
Amen!!! U betta say that!
Hard to do when it’s your son.
Narcissists are too egotistical to admit that they've made a mistake. They have NO humility!
Doesn't know how to say sorry..
Sometimes they do, but they will blame you for making them act that way and they will never change. Some narcissists will use fake apologies to manipulate you back in their lives.
Narcs were a mistake at birth.
They aren’t egotistical they are scared and feel unsafe
Paul Clinton thats very kind of you
Being with a narcissist is like walking in a mine field. You never know when you are going to step on it and get blown apart.
So true. They come out of the blue until you're on to them. But if you let them isolate you you're in trouble.
Perfectly said.... You've said enough I can get off CZcams now. LOL.
Omg this is a good way to describe it 👏👏👏
And then they play the victim when a little bit of your guts gets on their shirt and manipulates everyone else to spit on your remains.
Not really it's like a mine field but some of the soldiers know there's a minefield and some don't which makes much worse
The narcissist can never answer a direct question that involves them. They cannot take any kind of criticism or constructive criticism, they always do the turnaround, they always divert and they throw the blame back on you. They do it every single time.
Oh yes, indeed .. He Chris, hope you are doing well :)))
@N most definitely, most politicians are covert narcissists
@@LostHorizon52 well well well, small world, how are you Debbie! It's been awhile, everything going okay?
@@LostHorizon52 ever since Google Plus went down I lost contact with a lot of good people.
@@hugostiglitz4215 Same here, my friend .. I am still very disgusted with Google for throwing out all those years of hard work we all put in not only posting information on G+ but categorizing everything. I'm doing well good Buddy, hope you are well .. I went to MeWe (under LostHorizon52) in case you are there.
i rather be prefectly flawed then having a flawed thinking that im prefect
Were you trying to prove your imperfection by spelling perfectly incorrectly? =)
Fuckin A
Awesome quote Crazy Nerd💯
Crazy Nerd yasss
they don't want to be hurt but they love hurting others and tell them
I married a narcissist man he hurt me so much I’m still recovering, this people don’t have any sympathy or compassion for nobody
I feel your pain, 4 years on and still struggling and 💔💔💔
@@SOliveira2010 OMG, me too, 4 1/2 years. Well she walked out on me and kn the path to recovery I heard of narcs...she pointed out my mistakes, she was so mad when I apologized and tried to explain I didn't mean any harm or malice. But dare point out their faults, the screaming, name calling and insults just to shut me down. I kept blaming my self everytime she flipped.
@@jamesmuthiani5680 I am with you James, and I still love him, in my heart, he still my husband. He was the one that divorce me, "D" word was not in my vocabulary, even when things got bad. If you look my other messages in different videos of Gus and Dr. C. I still struggling because my believes and how sad I feel for them too. Feb 2015, I lost a part of my body. He was my family, the person I chose to grow old together in this not perfect world. 💔💔💔😔😔😔
Me too ....I’m tired ....😂😂😂
@@SOliveira2010 he did u a favor honey! Once you heal, you'll realize it was for the best. You'll be able to spot one early on and help others. Life with one is tormenting. Took me almost 2 yrs to heal. May God wrap his loving arms around you and comfort you🙏🏾❤
I’ve never once met a single narc who can do ANYTHING right, when it comes to human relationships. They may have other abilities, but not when it comes to interpersonal interactions. Always creating problems when there are none. As someone pithily summarized, “Narcissists have a problem for every solution.”
You absolutely nailed it!
Almost my whole family has inherited a narcissistic personality. You’re either a victim or the narcissist. It’s been hell.
Yep, I definitely relate 100% and I wanna kill my self every day for that
@@user-mo3hl4ho5c please don't let them win...cut them out of your life. Take care of yourself...you first!
Kim Michaluk thanks for the support, I really appreciate it...
Same
I'm there & have been for 66 yrs Just had nervous breakdown from it.
My mother is a narssistic person, I grew up feeling like I was never good enough no matter how hard I tried and that everything was my fault, including being born.
Big hug
I hear ya. Hang in there.
And then the sons and daughters carry on that narcissistic behavior ......not saying you...but thats the cycle
dial jensen Nooooooooooo you would have to be a sadist too , to do that ..
There is a way to heal from this, but it starts from distancing from her and go on a journey of self discovery, and ultimately, self love. One does not necessarily have to continue the cycle, but you need to do the work. Step away and work on yourself, not her.
These people struggle to engage in rationale dialogue in my experience, it's very challenging. They often just get angry and deflect.
How dare you challenge them?! You just shut up and listen! You might not want to question their perfection, they get even uglier and meaner. Youre messing with their core belief! They are perfect and everyone else is not.
The one thing you will notice is that they never know enough about you to begin to appreciate what makes you unique because they spend most of the time interacting with you by just telling you about themselves .. they hardly ever show an interest in your experiences .. they simply treat others as "props" in their play ..
Reading your comment reminded me that my ex narc told me, " I dont really know what you do." I told him countless times my job duties and what I did. However, when he got a promotion, best believe I better know everything his new job inolved. Smh
@@Withlove2ufromme Yes, smh .. they do consider it part of your "job" to bestow constant praise upon them .. if they could only realize how pathetic this makes them look, but if they could see that they would not be narcissistic ..
Yeah. One of the things they don't seem to realize is how boring conversation becomes with them. This alone depletes you enough to let go of the relationship.
@@Ram-uj8ls You are so right.
Ram very true, I almost went out with one. Lucky she found someone else and cheated on them. conversations were just about them and how good they are and how bad others were,not to mention playing the victim
This guy is excellent. I can only add to this: stay away, totally away from a narcissist. Just keep them out of your life as best you can.
then what do you do if you live in the same house because you have no means of moving to a different house? i guess i'm f****d 😂
@@Ken_Mags How about a son? Well, after many years of abuse and his manipulating and lying AND bashing me, I've finally admitted to myself this is how he is and now, I'm done. If he ever comes to me in earnest and apologizes and sees his rotten ways, I'll sit down and have the talk. Otherwise it's over. Sad but freeing at the same time. Now to heal!
@@hew195050 i don't think they will apologize ever nor they would see they're rotten ways. we HOPE they would someday but that will never happen. they will only try to connect with you if they need something from you so they can again gain the upper hand. we're just human so we also get tired to a point, we get drained, our patience tested to the max. whew! 😥
KembotMo yup. He’s only contacted me when in need and when the need is fulfilled, GONE! He WILL contact me again but hopefully this time I’m prepared to hold him at arms length. As for now I’m in conscious healing mode to repair my very soul.
@@hew195050 well good luck my brother. as for me, its getting worse 😂 oh man
At the end of the day I feel like Narcissists are just people that hate themselves SO MUCH they live in their ego's fantasy of perfection. As someone who struggle with a highly self judgmental ego, I feel sorry for them.... and especially all the people they hurt
This is fairly accurate
Great way to put this!!!!!!
Sympathizing with a narcissist is like tying a big rock around your ankle and tossing the rock into a giant hole. The only solution is to stay far far away.
Never ever feel sorry for them parasites.
They rarely plan anything... and when things go awry... they are the victim...
Nick Dannunzio - great observation! And a new one for me to ever hear. Sooo true to my situation for decades now.
Nick Dannunzio bingo!!!
This is sooooooo true!!!
So true! Someone I know helped his narc relative move her entire heavy furniture to another narc relatives house because she was moving. He was pressured by yet another narc relative to get it done in a day's notice. He got the job done, but had to pay some friends to help because it was a big job. When it was finished, the narc relatives criticized him for not doing it exactly the way they wanted. He never broke anything in the move & did a really good job. They still owe him $$, but won't pay it. So, he did these narcs a favor, but they are so ungrateful. And they don't keep their word. A few weeks later, he got injured & became unable to walk. All these narcs do is sit around & gossip & blame him for not being able to help them do another move, after telling him they'd never use him again to move their stuff since he did such a bad job the 1st time. These narcs are mentally ill.
The narcs belief..They can do no wrong and we as mere mortals, can do no right
Have you ever played star wars knights of the old republic? There's a line, I think Atton says to Revan, you Jedi constantly forget how much we normal people accomplish without magic. (it's a decade old game I forgot the actual dialog).
combine this belief with right-wing Christinity and you really have an issue of superiority.
@@Lola-mt1ne hell yeah sister. Call it out loud and true.
@@Lola-mt1ne not sure about witch wing extremism...but usually 'wingy-dingy
@@Lola-mt1ne omg so true!
They are "legends in their own minds" (what my mom used to say).
My Dad used that phrase all the time. Ironically, he had NPD pretty bad too.
I think we should all be legends in our own minds
@USA#1 !! LOL~can't say she made this up, but she DID say it a lot about a narc in our lives...
D.L. Moore my mom constantly said that
@@christianvolland9194 There you go! You must've had a narc in your life early on, too!
Every time I tried talking about some meaningful, I come out of it drained, like I Just worked a 24 jour shift. What they do actually, its controlling the direction conversation takes, or deciding wether there can be a conversation. Controlled communication. Exhausting with bad results
Its so surreal when it’s happening. In my head I think just stop talking I’m uncomfortable but I just smile and nod and fake interest and I think he knows I’m over it and keeps it going to piss me off it works and then I’d go to bed angry. Gr
I wish they could be healed. Their disease is worse than cancer.
I think they can given sufficient time. I live with a narcissist and I noticed that when she started doing something she was really good at, she started to form a healthy aspect of her personality. The bad news is that it takes decades for small improvements.
Jaime Warlock I’ve seen that in narcissists plenty times before, seemed like they were finally changing for the better. Then nope, just a matter of time till that same nasty person came shining right back thru. Narcissist don’t just magically get better on their own. They just get more covert, or temporarily preoccupied with other obsessions of the moment.
Wilson Anderson I don’t think we should trivialize cancer. But I also don’t think we should even compare them at all. It’s not “nothing compared to cancer”, you are 100% mistaken there. I have two narcissist parents & I never want anything to do with them again. I suffered 30 years of trauma at their hands, that has caused me to now have complex ptsd, panic disorder, agoraphobia, & an eating disorder. And all of those things also cause me substantial physical health problems also. I’m entirely disabled. It’s nearly cost me my life more times than I can count. Cancer is cancer, whether of the mind or body. Both can be terminal. Both can be fatal. Both are a slow unimaginably painful deaths.
But fun tidbit, the mind & body are not as separate as you may think, and most cancer actually begins in the mind. But that’s a whole other conversation you may not be prepared for.
Wilson Anderson I hardly feel like dignifying such nonsense with a response, seeing as you clearly possess some necessary reading comprehension. But since I have time to kill, I will reiterate once more for the hell of it.
Maybe you’re one of the “lucky” ones who can simply “brush off” a narcissist. Cool, good for you then, you’re an exception, or in heavy denial. Or you’re idea of a true narcissist isn’t accurate which is common. Either way true abuse never goes away, no matter of whether you cut them off or how long it’s been since. You’re delusional if you think cancer is more terminal that. It causes sickness & cancer of the mind that NEVER goes away. It metastasizes. It leads to even more trauma. It TAKES LIVES. Not all of them, but neither does cancer. I’ve seen people beat cancer & go on to live perfectly normal lives after. I have 4 people just in my immediate family alone that have had cancer & gotten rid of it, rather quickly at that. It’s not always a life sentence. But you never get a normal life after true narcissistic abuse.
But the point wasn’t even to compare them, because they can’t be compared. Cancer is not worse than trauma inflicted neurological injuries. And I’m not saying neurological damage is worse either. Both can be life or death for someone affected. Just because YOU think one thing is more serious cuz you’ve clearly never experienced the other side, doesn’t make it so.
But since you’re literally asking me if I’d rather die a slow painful death of cancer (we’re talking maybe a few years probably max) or spending every day of my life dying again & again day after day in a pain & agony (physical & mental) that NO medication can ease, like there is available for a cancer patient? Would I rather suffer a few years of agony as opposed to a LIFETIME! 30 years and BEYOND?! Fucking yes I would. Without hesitation.
First of all cancer can be cured. Despite what big pharma wants everyone to think, since cancer is the biggest money making scheme there is. But don’t even get me started on that.
Anyways, if you think mental pain & neurological damage isn’t every bit as real as physical illness, if not worse, than you have a lot to learn about life, and also about how the mind/body work scientifically.
Not to mention, you don’t see cancer patients offing themselves because the pain is too unbearable. But on the other hand, you don’t see suicide rates dropping whatsoever...so tell me again how mental pain is so much more bearable.
Just because you can’t see someone’s sickness doesn’t make them any less sick.
But by all means, go ahead & keep spreading your toxic stigma around.
Wilson Anderson And as to how cancer begins in the mind...research my friend. Research. The mind & body are not so separate as you may like to think. The mind affects biology, not just thoughts. Not enough space in a comment for an entire lecture on the subject, but check out a special on Netflix called Heal that presents some interesting thoughts on the topic to get you started
It's been amazing ever since I went no contact with her. It's been a year now, best thing I ever did. I've never looked back.
Another Level I’ve finally deleted his phone number/social media/and am in the process of BURNING ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING THAT he bought me or gave me over the years. While he was in silent treatment and disappearance mode, I took that time and I FOUND MY VOICE..when he Hoovered, my newfound need to be more than a doormat didn’t fare well for him. I am DONE!!!!! Freedom
Just your profile name gives u away m8!!
you are another to what??
LUCKY 😭😭😭
When you ask them a question, any question, they know you want something from them.... here their power game starts.
This is so true..
Agree
I'd put a finer point on it: to answer is to acknowledge to you that they saw you, heard you, and thought enough of you to lower themselves to speak to you. And that's way too exposing of them to you.
And the visa-verce situation: are they curious?
Synchronistic mathematics.
@Joyce S. Start listening at 1:14, or back up a few seconds from there to hear their belief and then what Dr. Carter says is the question he likes to ask.
I love difficult crosswords... during the “love-bombing” stage my ex-narc claimed to have many interests which match mine...however, I began to notice that he couldn’t answer relatively simple crossword questions about our “shared” interests. Had quite a limited knowledge even about his interests. When the devaluation stage began I would purposely ask questions he should have been able to answer....when he couldn’t the thinly veiled aggression/evasion/ignoring strategies would be deployed. Thankfully I have always been interested in psychology, in an amateur way, and realised what was happening. Ran for the hills and didn’t look back. Been absolutely “No-contact” for two years now and couldn’t be happier.
Took psych 101 in community College. Very interesting. Just started educating myself on narcissist I thought he was a sociopath.
My favorite:
"Sounds like a personal problem to me."
I hate it when people use this phrase and actually think that it sounds clever.
If I even try to have a conversation with a narcissist she says "I'm not going to speak on it" or "i dont want to argue" lol I'm not arguing I'm just trying to communicate with you as two adults that are in a relationship do
Clayten Burns
Yeah they are truly empty. They can’t face their faults or even reason through understanding and talking
My husband is the same. It's a terrible feeling that he never wants to hear anything . He always shuts me down by saying he doesn't want to fight.
I know exactly what you are talking about! It always turns into the blame game. It's frustrating because nothing is accomplished!
Narcissist: Communication? What's that?? I thought it was my order!
Clayten Burns yep !!!!! I’ve heard this countless times and it was basically him trying to train me until I went ghost on him cause his communication sucks. He came hoovering over me smh I hate that I had his child . I left it up to God because I didn’t know what to do after I heard the heartbeat. He told me to get an abortion and now he uses our child as leverage smh . Sad and sick
They get triggered easily by their vulnerabilities. After these salty moments, they will do silent treatment until you apologize, accept blame and feel desperate.
Once you realize your value, you will no longer accept their toxic behavior. Their worst fears are being a low life, embarrassed, not getting positive compliments, people hating on them with others watching and eventually being alone...
If a Narcissist improves they are not narcissists that don't change they improve at manipulating better.
So sad that this is in our lives. Especially within people we love.
Always ask a narcissist “What’s in it for me!?”
I'm gonna try that!!!
Don 😁
What was your experience with that? Mine was an offer of sex which I declined by saying that we'll never happen. Silence since then and I'd say she's done with me
Def
😂🤣
My father is a textbook narcissist and I cannot stand him at all. I have no idea how to get away from him without also getting away from my mother, as I love her more than anything in this world. She's the complete opposite of him. Loving, nurturing, and an excellent mother. How she's been able to put up with him for 48 years is way beyond me. He brings out the worst of me. I find myself actively trying to say horrible things to hurt him deeply, which is something I hate. My mother recently broke her back and so I went to her house to do her housework, and while I was cleaning her bathroom, my father decided to specifically use *that* bathroom to take a crap (they have 2 bathrooms in the house). I told him that that was really rude, as I now had to sit there and smell it while I finished cleaning it. I'll never forget what he said after that. He said "My poop doesn't smell, my stomach is clean because I constantly go to the bathroom", and he was *completely* serious. I was in utter shock that someone actually, literally, believed that their shit doesn't stink. I just wish I could get away from him forever. Sorry for the long rant, I just hate narcissists.
@@krissyr3393 I'm trying very hard, but he is just so horrible that it's nearly impossible for me to contain my anger. He's one of the worst people I've ever come to know. I will try harder! Thank you for your response, dear 🙂
@@krissyr3393 That's exactly how I feel; like he's turning me into this hateful and angry person. He says and does such hurtful things, that sometimes I even sort of fantasize of saying some really awful things and hurt him badly. That's not me - that's not who I want to become. And it's so frustrating because some days I'll be in a great mood and I'll go visit them, and once he sees how happy I am, he tries his hardest to crumble it as quickly as possible.
@@AllisonChains64 One of the best bits of advice my Dad ever gave me was when I was a young girl and truly at my wits end with my narcissist mother. He said, with a warm smile and his arm around my shoulders "Sweetie, you have to learn how to let some things go in one ear and out the other." I didn't know you could do that. Like I said, I was a kid and my mother had drilled into me that I had to pay attention to her every word, anticipate them even better. So, from my Dad to me to you "Just let it go in one ear and out the other." All the best dearie!
@@blurrylights6344 I'll definitely try that, Kris! Thanks so much for that advice 🙂
Don't apologize sometimes you/people just need to get it off their chest. I read your comment. I stop myself and delete when I realize I am telling my experience maybe I won't next time. I care I don't know you but I will be thinking of you.
Anyone involved with one is simply being used. When you realize this, you will end the relationship, if you’re secure and smart. Just do it
What if it's your own Mother?. Taken me many years and utter heartache to finally walk away. It will be have a happy ending and that is hard to deal with.
Sometimes that isn’t an option though. Trust me, I’ve looked at all scenarios over years and years.
Pollyanna I did!!!
Emily Lane You don’t have to have your mother in your life if all she will do is use you and abuse you. Even if she is elderly, she is toxic. You deserve much more.
Isn't it ironic being accused of using them is a repeated accusation.
Get me this, go do that, pick that up, never a please or thank you.
And then complains if someone forgets to say it once to them 😒
I live with this everyday. I feel like a personal Postmates driver.
I called my mother on having manners! How about saying please when you want something?!? MOM: Well, I'm going to BEG someone to do something!! Realy?! So in her mind saying please is begging- unbelievable!!
Correction: MOM: Well, I'm NOT going to beg someone to do something!
Exactly... My dad humiliates and says "she never cooks any food for me!!!!!" And when I say "I made that and that?" He says "shutup you never did that" like....
"why are you doing this to me?" Never got an answer from a narc ever.
They arent doing it, see? It is (happening)...
I think they enjoy hurting..the devil beware!
If a narc would answer its more like:me? No you doing it to yourself its your fault..you make me do it ect..blame always the other..they do never anything wrong..its always the other one or persons..
? Doing what to you? What are you talking about?
Because they don’t care how you feel
Narcissists rarely if at all apologize for their actions. A very unconscious Behavior
Never heard sorry in 11 years. Said I had no accountability though. 😁
@@ltmoods4182 The one that has accountability is the one who grieves, is responsible for their actions and is the first one to admit they are wrong. If you see anybody in denial of any of these then there is a very good chance they are a sociopath and or narcissistic fuck.
They don’t like to say thank you either, you do something for them it’s like they are thinking “that’s what you are supposed to do anyway”
@@quevicular I agree, my ex is definitely a narcissist. Never cared about my feelings or how my day was.
Or they’ll apologize and continue their bad behavior and apologize again and again and again. . . Repeat, repeat.
Some narcissists do make themselves into accomplished people and work insanely hard. But I can't say that benefits the people around them or makes them feel more together or connected. Everyone ends up catering to the narcissist's expectations of what he/she believes they deserve. You're right it's not about common humanity, it's about image and grandiosity, not love
Wow! I wish I had this information 20+ years ago!! Could have saved me a lot of confusion and heartache!! Ughhh!
I wish I knew 5 years ago
I hate I met this person
Keep fighting!!!
Gently walk up to them, look them in the eye and say I FORGIVE YOU. I did that and it drove my ex crazy. I did not ever expect an apology. But when I said that to him...he had to look at himself and that really was mind bending to him. He knew what he was doing was wrong.
I often thought narcs could be great baseball players or politicians, because they can Dodge, deflect and deny most anything that comes their way. Lol..
Aren't they tho, I mean quite literally? What describes being successful if being POTUS doesn't?
That is so true! I don't know how they do it, but they are SO SLIPPERY
@AllYouKnowIsWrong and a little narcy to name yourself allyouknowiswrong. Everybody literally everyone is somewhere in the spectrum. It's good to love yourself. The thing is, malignant narcs DON'T love themselves and their arrogance is a mask to hide it.
Aint that the TRUTH!!
@AllYouKnowIsWrong I followed you lead with the same smile on my face I assume you wore. Sorry if I upset you with my joke. 😜
My ex narc found a great way to manipulate me for a long time - Hed say sarcastically " youre a Christian, think you are so high and mighty - you should forgive me !" And so for years I forgave all forms of abuse, being cheated on over and over , and being stolen from - Finally one day I said , " I agree with you , Im NOT high and mighty and the amount of forgiving you need is for God , not me , so BYE " So I had to realize I didnt have to be so " forgiving " Thank you soooo much for another very insightful and spot on vid 😀
The Christian concept of forgiveness of others is just another tool used by narcissists to manipulate victims into situations where they are lead to think that they can't break free of the abuser without renouncing their Christianity. This is a trap.
happy angel you should have told him that forgiveness is for yourself and not him and walk away.
@@jussaraarundel9953 So true ! Only if I had realized it sooner ....thank you 🌸
Mine is a lukewarmer for sure (obviously) and after my own walk with the Lord and truly taking the time to really obey and commit so much light has been shed on the situation. He literally pick and choose bits and pieces from the Bible to appease himself. Once I started reading it all and calling things out he could not stand it and flat out called his own pastor and congregation liars and so on. I left his church, he twisted things so much. After stumbling on these videos all of it has made so much sense now. I had been praying to God to please reveal to me what to do with my marriage (yes my narcissist is my husband and we are seperated)
I am hardly answering his calls and messages now. Whereas before I would overlook things and continue to forgive while losing myself along the way. Not any more. He is too self centered to even realize it. The best part is I dont even feel depressed like I thought it would, instead I feel the Holy Spirit healing me and opening doors to serve and move on (and not move on with another, but just move forward in life period)
Happy Angel....good for you!
I just started back talking to my narcissistic cousin. And after talking to her I realized why I stopped talking to her, she's very self absorbed, no matter what we talk about it always comes back to her. Or she will cut me off mid sentence and tells me she will call me back. And it ends up being a day or two later!!!! The nerve of someone. I really refuse to allow anymore of this behaviour in my life.
They refer to their 'tight circle' and how you can't be a part of it because you can't be trusted. Or they bash your interests as being stupid or foolish. Then can't remotely see their own selves. The superiority, the contempt, the constant criticism, the mean spirited nasty mouth they run you down with.
I. Walked. Away.
I'm not giving ONE second to these types.
Was just thinking how funny it is that I never met or spoke to the people who helped me most in my toughest darkest moments, thanks to the internet. I wish I had the possibility to make massive donations to these angels. Thank you for being part of them!
# me too
Me too
I was just thinking he looks absolutely heavenly to me! He looks healthy, educated, spiritual, and just most importantly happy. He must have moved all the negative people and narc out of his life for good!
Basically it’s like living with a ten year old that still throws tantrums like a three year old complete with plugging ears and yelling “nananananananah” , using “the silent treatment “, or literally stops and walks out or ignores you if you don’t agree with them, or talk for more than 40 seconds at a time. I get 60 whole seconds to fill him in on the family stuff before he turns over( sometimes in mid sentence)and pretends he’s asleep while playing phone games. Yep, mine is an interesting one- lots of childhood issues packed in there as well, but boy is he the helpful, playful loving best buddy when we are out and about with others. His parents response when I told him that he was now verbally and emotionally abusive? “Well you are the one married to him. We had to deal with him until 18”. What?!!!! I even specifically asked them about mental health issues when we were dating. They totally lied to my face and covered up and lied about his past. Weird.
i feel so sad for you,i could cry, i often ask for help but no help comes,my life is much the same,my mother in law told me ,had she said what he was like she was sure i would have never married him, if only i knew then what i know now.I now stand up to him, i will not be the but of his jokes and be bullied by him. see if you can find someone who you can talk too, it helps to have someone who can be bothered to listen,all the best to you jacquelene
Run away? Get away?
You just described my ex boyfriend.
Kelli Gray exactly😦
You have been confronted by his flying monkeys and they will lie for him
My question would be "why is your time more valuable than mine"? They will be enraged if are late picking them up, but they wont be ready anyway.
Another thing is that they always manage to come back around you when they think you forgot about the crap they did to you or when your over them and you are doing better. It cuts there ego and that is something that is not tolerated by them.
the narc i've been with for 30 years deserves a million Oscars...
omg mine too!!
34 yrs with a covert narc almost cost me my mind
I very been with mine for 23. I've endured public insults poorly disguised as humor, that even those in earshot were surprised and shocked! The private humiliation is 100x worse, he feels nothing. 17 years, same house, no contact. He rarely speaks. Totally withdrawn. I'm done.
Humble, grateful, patient, thoughtful & considerate are all not popular ideas in the mind of a narc.
I agree. Thanks. 🤗🤗🤗👍👍👍👍
They might be intellectually however ; but they won’t be able to pull it off
And they NEVER provide encouragement and/or acknowledge/praise any of your accolades/accomplishments.
Unless it for show for their public persona
Your videos have helped so much this past week as I make plans to leave a covert narc..I knew I wasn't crazy all these years..Just came to the realization a few months ago as to what I really had been dealing with..Time wasted
Remember to ask yourself in any situation not why is this happening to me but instead 'what am i learning from this?'
Someone liked this and it notified me as a reminder . i needed to see this again
OMG, when you talked about questioning the narcissist about where his shirt came from and the fabric? That brought back an old memory. 40 years ago, my ex narc husband was bragging about how self sufficient he is, how HE doesn't need anyone to survive, I said "where will you get wheat?" He just stood there staring at me.
Needed to be reminded of why I wasn’t (and never would be) happy in my marriage to a narc. Now the struggle of sorting out all the confusion she instilled in me. Sometimes I think I actually believed she was “set apart” or above the rest of us. So mad at myself for falling for a narc...I was so naive.
You weren't Naive. No. You are a normal competent person. Blindsided by EXTREME manipulation. Believe me, they can get us all.
Be kind to yourself! You must be a nice empatic and warmhearted person... otherwise your narc wouldnt have choosen you to be her partner...
Mark Diffin I feel exactly the same way. The confusion. I was so naive as well. I consider myself a fairly intelligent human. But WTF just happened .... for the last 18 years!! But I got this eventually.
Mark Diffin it’s okay. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Kind people are a magnet to needy people. ‘Build a stronger shield’ is my new aspiration.
My college boyfriend at 19 yrs old was too shy to date but married a narc after he met her on a blind date. He moved to her home state. Two children later hr moved for his job as a doctor. Realized how happy he was without her until she joined him 5 months later. Bit the bullet until his empath daughter (like him) left home after 23 yrs of marriage. Narc barely worked & he has to pay alimony til 65. Worth every penny to him. We're together now after 38 yrs apart. It hurts me to know he didn't receive romantic love but that's what I'm for! I'm loving him for life.
Thank you so much for exposing all facts about the narcissist and leading me to recognize their behaviors! I finally getting rid of a narcissist who I had been with for 30 years! They are truly blood suckers (worse than vampires)! I feel so sorry for the next victim(s)!
I laugh because its only someone who truly been in it can relate and God knows u are right!
I've been married to one for 35 years .No wonder why I have feelings of shell shock
Ive been w him for a decade. I just want out right now. And i dont want him in my kids life. My daughter always tries to make him proud but he is never pleased. And he calls Our autistic soni defective and blames me
I've been married to one for 42 years. Never even knew what narcissism was until a year ago. Im sixty five and ready to run like the wind before i go completely insane!.
shortcut 57 yes , emptiness shel shock-that is it.
It's probably not worth the time to ask a direct question to a narc. Better to make statements to them like "I know you're a liar that's all I need to know".
Exactly! Never question!
Great advice! Be ready to keep it pushing, or absolutely ignore them afterwards. They must have the last word.
I'm not sure you can confront this lying narcissist. Just run you dont need to be right. YOU ARE.
@@chinookvalley 😂😂😂
Probably best to stay clear of them. Can become violent when they feel slighted or rejected by those who are lesser than.
Their attachment trauma is not "just like everyone else." Knowing the basis of narcissistic personality disorder empowers a person to defend against exploitation by (becoming supply for) narcissists. Instead of fighting them, you maneuver your way out of their orbit.
Well put Kevin!
Well put Bobby.
Sooo true Bobby...
Kevin, have you successfully done that? Would you tell us a little about it?
Exactly. I do not hook into their agenda. I've learnt to observe but not engage
Thats my narcissist. But no matter how much he gets. It is NEVER EVER ENOUGH!!
I finally figured out my mom was kathy bates from misery and mommie dearest all in one.. at age 46 quit all contact. Now am 52 best thing i ever did in my life .
Good for you!!!!!! Don't EVER feel bad about your decision since she is your mother. Sometimes it is definitely the right thing to do!
Lol, as a teenager, I once angrily said "Yes Mommie Dearest" to some demand of hers. Got a big ole face slap over it.
Wasn't wrong though. I'm really glad that movie was running on cable at the time. It gave me some validation, even back then.
Good on you for walking away. No one deserves to be treated that way, let alone someone's _child_
@@lunacouer
Slap in the face? That's when she would have been spitting teeth, my narc use to threaten me all the time but never acted on it,, he knew what my answer would have been and didnt want the embarrassment,
@@wakeup6910 I believe we're comparing apples and oranges, if you're talking about your ex. A mother narcissist and a romantic narcissist have two separate sets of issues they're dealing with.
@@lunacouer
No, I'm a man and I'm talking about my farther
I closed my eyes and though i was listening to Dr. Phil
Lol it's the Texas accent
Oh Wow. 😂
🤣😭😭❤
Except this guy isn't a clown and narcissist!
Dr. Phil is a tv personality, this is a REAL therapist.
they will do anything to keep a false image...
They think they know everything and could never be wrong
My ex gets angry when I ask something about our future... also when Im asking "why" questions.
If my ex was asking about "our" future I would get annoyed too lol.
Mara Althea yes why lol
@@righteousdeity1845 hahahahah!
Normal person: "We're all in this together". Narcissistic reply "You need to take responsibility for not empathising with me." Normal person: "Where did that come from?" Narcissist: "You're not showing respect to my perspective."
Translation: Narcissist is threatened by the mere possibility that they belong with the rest of us. If they don't belong then they can't be threatened. They must control their reality, or their world will fall apart - and they can only control it if they're not part of the messiness of humanity.
Wow, relationship with my ex in a nutshell
My narc told me his neighbor asked him "You do know that u're not Jesus right?
That is too funny! Your narc probably thought it was a compliment.
@@elgieswift3498 It didn't end there, later we argued he accused me of being an atheist that hasn't an ounce of faith so I lack faith to trust his dodgy moments, I said
"Oh your neighbour asked u a good question, u do know that u're not Jesus right? Oh u must be the chosen one"
He went furious 🔥 This is where I pointed out to him he has Npd. Of cos he immediately used projection to say I was the Npd.
I said "I knew u had looked into the Npd subject matter so u know what's it's all about. I don't need to educate u on that"
(Indicated by Terminology he's been using even b4 I discovered Npd such as - co dependant, same actions expecting diff result...He even had an Npd file in his desktop)
This is the time I pointed out to him that I am aware he's been attempting to role-switch me. That he's the one insane and he knows it yet he tries to 👑 crown me as the insane one.
He then claimed everyone around him knows how much of a nice guy he is.
I said that is just one of a typical Npd type, who only specializes in torturing his most intimate partner.
He went full-blown retarded called me a hypocrite 10 times. I mean he literally just yelled the word at me 10 times.
And he shouted Shut the F up 3 times. I told him to pull over I wanna get out of the 🚗 car. Followed by 55 txts from him within 2 hrs while he's driving.
@@jovialfaltisco548 I hope you are safely extracting yourself from this toxicity. Be careful, they don't take losing (you or anything else) well. Use some of the phrases suggested on these videos to avoid a big conflict when he gets like that b/c they always have to win the argument and it's just energy and soul draining for us.
@@elgieswift3498 Thank you. Yes but I couldn't help it to spell it all out. I'm aware many experts say don't directly point out the big word Npd right in front of their face.
Hahaha..they think they are Jesus they don't make mistakes they think they are special and perfect huh!! idiots they should be staying in Mental Hospital for treatment.
It's the most frustrating thing to feel invalidated or invisible.
When you mention "guilt and shame", my parents come to mind . So what did I do? I married a narcissist and stayed married for 37 years. Looking back, it was not easy and now that he is gone - I feel like I''m getting ready to take a fresh, deep breath of air.
I really love your talk, when you talk you remind me of a teacher or a neighbour who come over as, maybe you are walking your dog, and you have a kind friendly conversation with us, and I am very grateful, thanks so much
I totally agree.
lol yup
I do feel like I can drop in any time and Dr. C will have dose of good, heartfelt common sense. I tune in when I am second-guessing myself, and need reminding that it’s not in my head, it’s real. I really appreciate your delivery and honest, plain speaking. Thanks for your time and effort, putting together this great resource. You help a lot of people.
@@sandithomas4002 I do whenever I get recommendations for his videos which is all the time.
I've been listening everyday, and feel I have someone on my side now who knows I'm not crazy.
It's amazing to always get stronger by learning more about yourself than the narc in these videos. What I learn helps me be centered and be real so I don't get caught in the narc's traps and have a better life.
Absolutely. One covert that I hadn't picked up on had a way of manipulating conversations to elicit what he wanted. Asking a general question that the average person would answer "I am doing XYZ. How about you?" to set up his sob story of how he wants to do XYZ, but (insert some BS here) is keeping him from doing it.
Once I realized that I don't have to be my usual (overly) helpful self, any questions the covert asked got answered nicely. I didn't ask the "How about you?" part. So he asked the same question in FOUR different conversations. It wasn't an answer that one would say "Yes, I did that." and then later say "Nope.", you either did or didn't. Fourth time, I responded "for the fourth time, yes I did that already. Why do you keep asking?" and I got the bluster and dodge.
Covert was thwarted from giving his sob story, so he had to keep trying until he was successful. Now that I don't supply his opportunity to paint the poor me story to garner sympathy, he has avoided me. I have to thank Les, Meredith Miller, and Michelle Nieves for all their videos that helped me to learn that about myself and the narcs that I encounter.
So true.
Suzanne 👏👏👏 & 🎊🎉
I wish I had the strength to go yes you're absolutely right and smile at him every time he tried to pick a fight with me I think it would have pissed him off even more LOL and it would have made me feel more peace. But that never happened. But God forbid I ever run into another narcissist and if I ever am stupid enough to get into a relationship with one that's the one lesson I'm going to take away. Yes dear you're absolutely right and smile as I go about my business hahaha I'm being sarcastic here
Yes, understanding helps us take our power back. I am going to be me, with my own likes and dislikes and my own thoughts and opinions; and THAT'S OKAY!
Dr. Les, your youtube material and sessions are amazing. You've helped me tremendously with dealing with Narcissistic people, thank you :)
Narcissists when told the truth cry & then come out with, what have I done to deserve this. WTF???
Thank you Dr Carter!! You are amazing, and like a life saver thrown to a drowning victim. ❣️thank you for all you do
agree again.Your video help me so much not to drown!!!!
Dakota Matthes God bless your intellect, Dr. Carter🌼
My covert sister truly beleives with her entire being she IS the misunderstood special person and we are all just to stupid to see it.
Wandering Free You have one of those too huh? Mine is a little different. He knows he’s a dick but his money and status has convinced him that he is above criticism
Can you elaborate on this? How do you tell she has NPD when she is covert?
You're the beautiful one !!! for sure
Wandering Free
My covert sister is a liar, a thief, gossip, thinks she is more intelligent than any of us her siblings. Competitive, envious, feels entitled to what you have. Manipulative, talkative.
Brags good deeds she never did! Ahahaha
Such TOXIC person
Married young and seven years in, i began to think I was a fool and clumsy oaf Now I understand ❤️
Mine can't answer what's wrong with me, in spite of everything 'being my fault'. He says I'm hard to live with. But only when I stop some game he's playing or calling him on something he does, repeatedly.
Dr. Carter. Something today triggered a few memories and it made me realize that the manifestation of lack of empathy, self-centeredness and perception of people as extentions of themselves is that narcissists always consider their priorities more important than the priorities of their close-one's no matter what.... example.: A person gets sick with pneumonia, therefore that sick person's main priority becomes staying in bed and caring for their own health, taking antibiotics regularly, etc.. If the non-ill partner cares then the health of that sick person becomes one of the healthy person's priorities. However the nacissist, in such a situation, will continue to have the same list of priorities no matter how ill their partner - they will expect the same services: cooking, cleaning, dish-washing, going to work, etc. Opposite of that: the really codependent sick person will never make their own health priority number one and will continue to fulfill other people's priorities despite their own needs…. (and I am not talking about the needs of small children, who are truely dependent on their parents).
This is spot on.I had pneumonia and the narc husband refused to amend his schedule in anyway. He would never prioritise me or his children if it clashed with his needs.Sometimes our needs would align and I would get lucky but generally it was always about him. He is outwardly so charming and nice that everyone thought I had the perfect husband. The reality behind closed doors so was different. It made me ill as I lived flight or flight mode.
His new gf (a friends wife,!) has no idea what is in store but she wouldn't believe anyone who tried to warn her as he is so convincing.
Oh i am so sorry for ya'll.
My narcissist wouldn't listen to me when i told him i was having the baby. I walked out to the car ready to go myslef until a neighbor stepped in.
Praying for your safety, health, healing, prosperity, & freedom 🙏
To all of those who are feel that you are living along side a narcissist. You are not as trapped as you think. Gather your most important possessions and get out. They are not your owner. Just get up and leave. They do not own you. If they have to hurt you they will pay with the law.
So true...they do not own you! Dr. C
However, never underestimate the effects of gaslighting. They tend to be devastating.
My narcissist ex used to temper his self importance with a deliberate (phoney) self deprecation that was targeted to diffuse situations where people were getting fed up with his BS. Too often and for far too long it worked on all of us. Until it didn't.
Wow... now that you mention it, I can relate.
Don't try and have a heart to heart with the narcissist. It always turns into the blame game!
They can’t answer a lot of questions lol
Or just refuse to answer. After all they are perfect don't you know that by now? LOL Well it is not funny but all too true.
It is so true Lulu Lu!!! LOL
Or refuse to look at evidence that challenges the narrative that establishes them in their comfort zone.
Synchronistic mathematics.
Nope and when they do they like to state that what ever wrong done was never in their "intentions" lol if I had a pound for every time thats been said to me in the last 3 years!
My wife always throws questions that are "framed". If I go into detail it gives her the authority to "shut me down" ---when I must make a case for my defense.
Example: she wants a "yes" or "no" answer to complex topics. Later she will use the "black or white" answer as evidence that I did not tell her all the details.
Damned if you do damned if you don't.
Your videos have helped me see I am NOT the crazy one! And they have helped me to say enough IS enough IS ENOUGH!
Freebird Tina I left 6 wks ago and had no contact for 2 wks and now only do to get my stuff
@@tammyrollins2431 Good for you hon, stay strong in the Lord!!!! It is not going to be easy.
" *No one* will be universally admired "
Truth!
Also, they may be admirable to the public but behind closed doors they need that supply. *Nothing* is worth being a supply object.
Knowledge is power! Watch this once a day.....exercise get sunshine even in winter.....love yourself and be yourself.
My ex narc could never tell me why he "loved" me.
Maybe he doesn't really know what love is. Dr. C
well he sure does know how to love and maintain his multiple online dating accounts. Lol
Blessings to the people who clean up and keep us all so civilized. They are the best.
I was married to a Narcissist. for 13 years and he is a person who wants attention, approval from others which only indicates how insecure he is from inside. He wants to be centre of attention, its always about his image. He is so scared of being pointed out when he does a mistake that he starts yelling and shouting and blaming me for his mistakes. He doesn’t remember anything bad he did to me. When I produce the evidence then he says I don’t want to talk about it or he says I don’t remember but he remembers any incident if someone said something negative about him even 20 yrs back. Everything he does should suit him, that benefit him, that is convenient to him. He is a poisonous person.
You are so right.. They really do act like that.. Point out mistakes and never admit to their mistakes.. Always RIGHT.. Thank you very much..
The narc thinks they are perfect - so if you want to check if someone is narcissistic, ask them what mistakes they have made. A narc will not be able to admit to any mistake, EVER.
Not necessarily. They'll "admit" faults to paint themselves as gracious and righteous. Like, 'look at what I endured and learned from. I am better because I learned and bettered myself not you though...you'll never learn...you're a lost case'
@@snowflakemachine A response full of self-promotion and put-downs is a give-away. Test their claims for veracity or delusion, and they have given themselves away. A person who really has learned will be gracious in their answers
Was about to say, they will admit faults and self deprecate if they realize it's what "a normal person" would do
The covert narc will recount mistakes and failings in a discourse on how life, their childhood or whatever did them wrong and created the mess that they are that is to be pitied.
Or what they'd change or better about themselves
Five narcissists didn't like this video.
😂😂😂 lol
True, but they also watch these videos to plan new tactics of deception. They learn the lingo. It makes u want to vomit hearing them use it as a weapon
Mary you hit the nail on the head. It just shows how twisted these narcs can be. Kinda scary actually 😧
🏆 you won the internet today with that one. ! So true.
Mary Wilson Well, that's what ya expect of them haters.
30yrs married to a narc. Every single description in your videos is spot on.
This was a really helpful reminder, thank you. After N abuse I've found myself trying to be extraordinary or special at all times in order to never face humiliation or rejection again. This is a very good reminder that there is much more to life than that. Thanks again, your videos are so full of wisdom.