Surviving Narcissism
Surviving Narcissism
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Grieving The Person The Narcissist Could Not Become
After much exposure to narcissists, it becomes apparent that they cannot not will they ever be able to be the person you want them to be. No amount of persuasion or discussion will move them off their primary ingredients. Dr. Les Carter describes how this can trigger grief in you, but also explains how you can turn your grief into resolve for a better way of life.
If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter has a sponsor who can assist. Go to our sponsor betterhelp.com/drcarter for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help.
📣 Dr. Carter's new course, Anger Games, is live! 📣
Learn more about the course and register at: courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/anger-games
Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. For 40+ years he maintained a counseling practice in Dallas, conducting more than 65,000 therapy sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Since creating his CZcams channel, his videos have received more than 115 million views.
Join the Team Healthy community HERE: survivingnarcissism.tv/subscribe/
Check out videos, articles, quizzes, and more at our website: survivingnarcissism.tv
You can follow Surviving Narcissism on:
Twitter: @SNarcissism101
Instagram: @survivingnarcissism101
Facebook: @survivingnarcissism101
Dr. Carter has three other courses that you may find to be useful:
Free to Be: Reclaim & rediscover your uniqueness survivingnarcissism.tv/free-to-be-course/
This Is Me: Setting boundaries with the controllers in your life survivingnarcissism.tv/this-is-me
Ready, Set, Connect: Strengthen relationship skills; live authentically survivingnarcissism.tv/ready-set-connect/
Dr. Carter's personal website: drlescarter.com/
Dr. Carter's other CZcams channel: czcams.com/users/drlescarter
Bookstore: survivingnarcissism.tv/books-on-narcissism-surviving-narcissism/
zhlédnutí: 15 674

Video

One Tension That Exposes A Narcissist's Emptiness
zhlédnutí 22KPřed dnem
How you relate with people is directly impacted by your own internal steadiness...or lack of. Dr. Les Carter cites one specific tension that narcissists carry which makes it difficult for them to engage well with you. The lack of inner steadiness translates into the lack of relationship success. If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter has a sponsor who can assist. Go to our sponsor ...
Why Is Empathy So Foreign To Narcissists?
zhlédnutí 14KPřed dnem
No healthy relationship can be sustained in the absence of empathy. Dr. Les Carter describes how empathy can be developed, then explains why it is virtually impossible for narcissists to grasp. They are so consumed with ego protection that they cannot see into you. To read the article on this topic, go to survivingnarcissism.tv/why-is-empathy-foreign-to-narcissists/ If you are interested in onl...
Why Narcissists Need A Target, And How You Can Opt Out
zhlédnutí 44KPřed dnem
Narcissists carry much psychological pain, but instead of taking responsibility for personal healing, they look outward, insisting that you must make their lives easier. Dr. Les Carter describes why narcissists need you as a target, then he goes further by explaining how you can stay out of the role they have assigned you. If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter has a sponsor who ca...
Narcissists Want The Same As You, But
zhlédnutí 13KPřed dnem
To be human is to have needs. Narcissists, just like you, have normal desires, yet their methods of attaining those needs are so deplorable and their defining traits are so unhealthy that they develop very dysfunctional patterns. Your task is to seek your needs normally without being sidetracked by their misguided priorities. If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter has a sponsor who...
Why Narcissists Predictably Cling To Anger
zhlédnutí 23KPřed 2 dny
Each person experiences anger from time to time. Healthy people manage it constructively then move on toward higher priorities. Narcissists, however, are so consumed by the need for control, their anger holds them captive. They presumably wish to tap into [false] self-preservation, but in the end, they illustrate the anger only serves the purpose of covering hidden struggles with ineptitude. To...
How Aware Versus Oblivious Is The Narcissist?
zhlédnutí 24KPřed 14 dny
How Aware Versus Oblivious Is The Narcissist?
The Narcissism Of Toxic Masculinity
zhlédnutí 10KPřed 14 dny
The Narcissism Of Toxic Masculinity
A Survivor's Mindset Toward The Narcissist
zhlédnutí 2
A Survivor's Mindset Toward The Narcissist
Narcissistic Abuse Impacts You Forever, But How?
zhlédnutí 26KPřed 14 dny
Narcissistic Abuse Impacts You Forever, But How?
💢 Learn more about Dr. C's New Course: Anger Games 💢
zhlédnutí 2,6KPřed 21 dnem
💢 Learn more about Dr. C's New Course: Anger Games 💢
Is It Time To Disconnect From The Narcissist?
zhlédnutí 18KPřed 21 dnem
Is It Time To Disconnect From The Narcissist?
A Very Odd Way Of Finding Control Over A Narcissist
zhlédnutí 42KPřed 21 dnem
A Very Odd Way Of Finding Control Over A Narcissist
How Narcissists Sabotage Their Alleged Superiority
zhlédnutí 19KPřed 21 dnem
How Narcissists Sabotage Their Alleged Superiority
Breaking Away From Trauma Bonds, featuring Dr. Nadine Macaluso
zhlédnutí 10KPřed 28 dny
Breaking Away From Trauma Bonds, featuring Dr. Nadine Macaluso
Why Can't Narcissists Be Kind?
zhlédnutí 24KPřed 28 dny
Why Can't Narcissists Be Kind?
The Ultimate Proof Of Narcissists Quitting On Themselves
zhlédnutí 22KPřed měsícem
The Ultimate Proof Of Narcissists Quitting On Themselves
6 Blind Spots That Keep Narcissists Stuck
zhlédnutí 13KPřed měsícem
6 Blind Spots That Keep Narcissists Stuck
Introducing Dr. C's New Course: Anger Games!
zhlédnutí 3,5KPřed měsícem
Introducing Dr. C's New Course: Anger Games!
5 Signs Of Narcissists Losing Their Moral Compass
zhlédnutí 19KPřed měsícem
5 Signs Of Narcissists Losing Their Moral Compass
What Is A Narcissist's Defense Mechanism Of Splitting?
zhlédnutí 17KPřed měsícem
What Is A Narcissist's Defense Mechanism Of Splitting?
7 Ways You Hand Over Your Power To A Narcissist
zhlédnutí 25KPřed měsícem
7 Ways You Hand Over Your Power To A Narcissist
Healthy Versus Unhealthy Boundaries, featuring Terri Cole
zhlédnutí 11KPřed měsícem
Healthy Versus Unhealthy Boundaries, featuring Terri Cole
How Narcissists Play Both Sides Of The Victim Game
zhlédnutí 20KPřed měsícem
How Narcissists Play Both Sides Of The Victim Game
Why Can't Narcissists Connect?
zhlédnutí 24KPřed měsícem
Why Can't Narcissists Connect?
What Do Narcissists Gain By Being Secretive?
zhlédnutí 21KPřed měsícem
What Do Narcissists Gain By Being Secretive?
What Does It Mean When A Narcissist MUST Dominate?
zhlédnutí 20KPřed měsícem
What Does It Mean When A Narcissist MUST Dominate?
A Narcissist's Playbook For Whittling Away Your Independence
zhlédnutí 20KPřed měsícem
A Narcissist's Playbook For Whittling Away Your Independence
What Is A Contrarian Narcissist?
zhlédnutí 23KPřed měsícem
What Is A Contrarian Narcissist?
Narcissistic Families That Resemble Cults, featuring Meredith Miller
zhlédnutí 38KPřed měsícem
Narcissistic Families That Resemble Cults, featuring Meredith Miller

Komentáře

  • @lisaklein664
    @lisaklein664 Před 17 hodinami

    Thank you for being a supportive and soothing voice on such a difficult topic. I love that your dog is blissfully sleeping too❤🇦🇺

  • @marysanders9461
    @marysanders9461 Před 17 hodinami

    Some people don't WANT to be decent because they would much rather have the power they get from the abuse they inflict.

  • @conniesagredo5316
    @conniesagredo5316 Před 17 hodinami

    Exactly that's what happened to me

  • @SaraNorman-lv6cu
    @SaraNorman-lv6cu Před 17 hodinami

    She had to delete her old CZcams account and patreon because he was threatening to kill her if she didn't(lol not like he wouldn't anyway) but shes back she needs peoples help in spreading the word about this monster!

  • @dechenthurman2708
    @dechenthurman2708 Před 17 hodinami

    Two of my favorite narcissistic survivor coaches in one video

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 Před 18 hodinami

    Never ever again!!!!!

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    Any kind of feeling you show a Narc - whether it is a positive or negative emotion - will feed the Narc, so that they will feel "alive" and seemingly thriving forward while you will be punished, feeling confused and empty.

  • @FrankLittlestone-ep8df
    @FrankLittlestone-ep8df Před 18 hodinami

    Unfortunately they're not endowed with ears 🤔😆

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    To survive you need to create a new mindset - mind above emotions. To heal your trauma responses (fight, flight, freeze, fawn) you need to get aware of your triggers. To thrive forward you need to focus on your own identity, your needs and your goals.

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    Narcs perceive the world through their subjective feelings and not through any kind of logic. Their goal is to get power over you. And getting power over you is through your emotional reactions. Their manipulative play (by gaslighting you so that you will doubt your reality) is to feed them with your emotions.

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    Never show a Narc your emotions because Narcs are only concerned with eliciting emotional feelings from you. Your emotional reactions will fill their emptiness and will regulate their own feelings.

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    As an adult that has become awareness and insight into Narcissism, which is the absence of love, you can make a choice to survive with an approach to set your mind above your emotions. Because Narcs can only survive by any reactions of your emotions.

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 18 hodinami

    As a child you survived because of your 4 trauma responses: fight-flight-freeze-fawn. These were your protections. You did not know anything about Narcissism but your body knew instinctively that there was something terribly wrong, because you felt unsafe.

  • @autumnsmith3585
    @autumnsmith3585 Před 18 hodinami

    🤎Gus🤎

  • @drfill9210
    @drfill9210 Před 18 hodinami

    Several experiences over the years. One thing that can bring a strong narc back from the brink is to have a planned strategy. You know that next fight will be over a particular thing and the response will be a predicted threat or action. Make that action a red line that must not be crossed, and have a planned response if the line is crossed. This is the scary bit. This planned response has to be unexpected and HUGE. The way you play this out is that you give them 2 or 3 chances to back down and if no, operation nuclear begins. What will happen? Most likely they will not back down and have to eat the consequences. BUT if your response is huge but has the capacity to be reversed or mitigated in a day or two, you will discover that they will be negotiating with you. Now the terms will be unfavourable so some decisions on what you will put up with need to be carefully considered... but as things return to normal you will notice they no longer treat you with contempt. If they know you have the capacity to hurt them big, they will at least play nice even if they don't internally change.

  • @lorrainegartrell1907
    @lorrainegartrell1907 Před 19 hodinami

    All your doing is digging a bigger and bigger hole

  • @Lovemydog714
    @Lovemydog714 Před 19 hodinami

    My family member has gone, in less than a year, from love B-mbed to discarded in the cruelest way. Now the narc is stalking her because he can’t believe she’s had enough. I fear for her safety-she came home from work at night and he was in her house-he has a key. I told her to get the locks changed asap.

  • @marcirobins5144
    @marcirobins5144 Před 19 hodinami

    🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

  • @lorrainegartrell1907
    @lorrainegartrell1907 Před 19 hodinami

    They refuse to acknowledge that they are the problem

  • @maryann7777
    @maryann7777 Před 19 hodinami

    Good evening to Mr Gus !!! Thank you and I appreciate you doctor

  • @lorrainegartrell1907
    @lorrainegartrell1907 Před 19 hodinami

    B free Indeed

  • @iiyoniezeHill
    @iiyoniezeHill Před 19 hodinami

    Appreciate Your knowledge on the word Narcissist it really Helped me leave & individual based on understanding this is Not just what they are but this is How they feel & behave I was totally oblivious . . . I mean totally oblivious- I realize I came into Such a Person from a place of tolerance & tolerating so much when I met this person that I jus learned to tolerate & that included what felt like pretty Much Nothing Coming from them when we met them I jus came into a place of tolerating as much as I did that it was Nothing or jus a different kind of tolerating of such person including behaviors etc - but ur knowledge Helped me see wat I was dealing wit I always considered this individual Needy & obsessed with me to a certain Extent as Narcissist are but I Never seen it as too Much of a Red Flag I Jus tolerated it . . . Now I see beyond my toleration & realize How Sick this individual is As Some of his behaviors did scream abusive but his Neediness & obsession to me kept me from allowing myself to walk away cus he Never lets me leave but my 3rd pregnancy & beautiful baby helped me stop Any destructive tendencies I have & Helped me see straighter clearer & videos like urs came to me with more truths from God once my mind was clear which Helped me release myself from Such a Sick person & Unhealthy behaviors that I see more clearly Now that my life is void of anything Unhealthy- Not Every Sad Person is a Narcissist Some jus have very low self esteem etc & u have to be able to recognize whose who & whose truly Sick why & How so . . . .buy Thank u for ur knowledge & insight . . .wow u really turned me Around!

  • @PMElfman79
    @PMElfman79 Před 19 hodinami

    I live with my sister, who called me a narcissist because she described our dynamic and situation to her therapist who then said I was a narcissist and our mother was an enabler. I responded to her that I didn’t think a therapist was allowed to diagnose someone who they have never seen before. But I was completely taken aback by this statement and began to wonder if I am truly a narcissist or if I have some narcissistic tendencies? I started watching these videos to understand narcissistic behaviors and try to work on myself ahead of going to a therapist. I also went to Reddit to try and get info there. The more I watch these videos it’s actually describing my sister completely and now I’m wondering if I’m actually the narcissist or if she was projecting or are we both narcissists in different ways and we are unable to see eye to eye? Either way, I am completely grateful for this channel. Thank you.

  • @susanmunoz7688
    @susanmunoz7688 Před 19 hodinami

    Again I say, thank you Dr. Carter. You’ll never know this side of Heaven how many people you have helped understand what we have been experiencing. Thank you again. May God Bless you and your family. One of team Healthy.

  • @san39
    @san39 Před 20 hodinami

    my father died last week, hadn't seen him in 8 years. i had to end the relation back then. Tuesday it all came back. I wrote it down. Today i felt so angry, just because of all the memories about things that happend from my teenage years on. Tomorrow is his funeral. I am not going to attend. But the anger from today suprised me. I haven't healed yet.

  • @MarthaEllen88
    @MarthaEllen88 Před 20 hodinami

    Thank you so much Dr Carter. Feeling trapped in a difficult marriage but staying for sake of children

  • @caroleminke6116
    @caroleminke6116 Před 21 hodinou

    I’m still coming to terms with my childhood as a survivor of two narcissistic parents who were both only & unwanted children of older narcissistic mothers. I realize that a happy life was denied me & their deaths came too late to free me. Counseling only worsened the problem. Finally a hospice therapist at my church mentioned that I was probably shamed. A lifetime of their sick projections has made it impossible to know my true self. What a waste of humanity results from narcissistic behavior

  • @Kelly-Smith
    @Kelly-Smith Před 21 hodinou

    Thank you Dr C for keeping it REAL!!

  • @Christine-io1gq
    @Christine-io1gq Před 21 hodinou

    Agreed 100%!

  • @MaryJoMatey
    @MaryJoMatey Před 21 hodinou

    How are you supposed to stay away when u had to move in w them due to serious mold issues in my home I was renting ?? God help me

  • @timothyanderson6034
    @timothyanderson6034 Před 21 hodinou

    This is trump

  • @yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753
    @yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753 Před 21 hodinou

    Ain't it just the truth! It's also Tiresome. Nobody needs this

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 21 hodinou

    to argue with lying jealous envious narcissists, know it all narcissists, it's a fruitless endeavor. such pathetic pathetic pathetic narcissists. they are so pathetic. they are really really really pathetic.

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 21 hodinou

    beat you with experience?? what experience?

  • @An-mei
    @An-mei Před 21 hodinou

    Surviving/survivor starts as a state of mind.

  • @direstraights
    @direstraights Před 21 hodinou

    Just walk away .. then they call us 'crazy' they are abandoned intrinsically period. Abandoned all of their lives, nothing is food enough nor can we save them. Run asap!!!

  • @lizbethclay1177
    @lizbethclay1177 Před 21 hodinou

    Dr. Les, you are a wonderful human being. I appreciate all you give.

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 21 hodinou

    hello,les how are you doing today? i really hope you're doing fine. hope you're doing good my friend. how's gus?

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 22 hodinami

    of course the lying narcissists in my life would say to anybody who gullibly believes them or to anybody who will listen the lying jealous narcissists, they would tell, i mean the narcissists in my life would say that i don't have any legitimate reasons and that i never had any legitimate reasons,that's exactly what they would tell people. defaming my character, they always always always have. and they always did. and they always always always do. all of the time. constantly constantly and constantly. it is constant. and it is constant. and they have always always always hurtfully hurtfully lied on me. and they are always always constantly constantly constantly lying on me.

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 22 hodinami

    the narcissists in my life deflection of blame, they always always do, they always do. they always have. and they always did. they always have. and they always did. they always do. they are always always always deflecting the blame. always deflecting the blame. some of my 'family members', i refuse to call them family. i have always had my reasons. i have my reasons. my reasons why i have never really acknowledge them as family, i never really have acknowledged them as my family,well as i said i have my reasons, i have my own reasons.

  • @jasminebarratt1809
    @jasminebarratt1809 Před 22 hodinami

    Author, yes that is a good way of looking it, like they are the author of all truth, but they are not.

  • @LonD-ji5xf
    @LonD-ji5xf Před 23 hodinami

    Heard this statement several times. Different men maybe pretending to b talking on the phone ( nobody want her now) who is that person? Ooh poor thing thought I could save ur life or did I just didn't want u? Ur day coming. Nephew lost his life. Haha. Nephew will always have the last say.

  • @ceciliahink6611
    @ceciliahink6611 Před 23 hodinami

    Do narcissists know they are narcissists???

  • @LonD-ji5xf
    @LonD-ji5xf Před 23 hodinami

    If Viagra is doing so well? Y older females r left lost an confused. My latter yrs will b my best yrs. The past is what will make the present. A present

  • @LonD-ji5xf
    @LonD-ji5xf Před 23 hodinami

    That Viagra should been taken off the market or put on the shelf. One stop bread milk an Viagra.

  • @kushysmoke3690
    @kushysmoke3690 Před 23 hodinami

    This describes my uncle to a tee

  • @davidbradley1735
    @davidbradley1735 Před 23 hodinami

    I'm married to a covert narcissist. My dilemma is that we have kids and if I've felt if I left, I would never see them again. My kids don't understand what their mother does, and I feel if I left, they'd be in an even worse situation. At least I'm aware of the sabotage, the energy drain, love bombing, and manipulation . It's not as bad when it's predictable. I still have hope for the future, that one day I will escape and have a life again.

  • @Hugging_Cactus
    @Hugging_Cactus Před 23 hodinami

    Texas and Texans are great, But Tom Cruise is right about the psychology profession. Narcs are not worthy of anything but their end, but they are more prevalent than ever before. they no there are no consequences. thanks to the Psych Profession!!

  • @user-ez1bo3wn5m
    @user-ez1bo3wn5m Před 23 hodinami

    the narcissists in my life are lying narcissists and they are so envious of me,they are really really envious of me,and they are pathological habitual liars and they are such trouble makers. and they lie and cover for each other,and they have lied just to cover their own pardon my french asses. just to cover their own tails. they are so envious of me. they always have been so jealous of me. they are so jealous of me. they are always insulting my intelligence,they are constantly constantly constantly insulting my intelligence. they are know it alls. they always have been, they always were. a whole bunch of know it alls. they have always put me down. they are constantly constantly constantly putting me down. they are always always always put me down. they always have put me down. they are constantly constantly constantly constantly constantly constantly putting me down.

  • @SusieBear-ji3hq
    @SusieBear-ji3hq Před 23 hodinami

    It's a human don't the dream is OVAH~~~