The Day Today: Collaterlie Sisters - BUSINEWS

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  • čas přidán 24. 04. 2010
  • A montage of The Day Today's finance correspondent, Collaterlie Sisters.
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 267

  • @3chords490
    @3chords490 Před 3 lety +370

    This actually makes more sense to me than the actual finance news. I’ve been basing my entire investment portfolio on her advice and made 2 million kidneys so far.

  • @Vojife
    @Vojife Před 6 lety +288

    She's such an excellent actress! That little unnatural proud, amused flash of a laugh at arbitrary times is brilliant.

  • @christaylor7411
    @christaylor7411 Před 3 lety +134

    Her acting is so intense it’s unsettling. So underrated

  • @deltaMurdoch
    @deltaMurdoch Před 3 lety +105

    Collaterlie's sudden deactivation at 1:27 will never cease to kill me

  • @madmurdock100
    @madmurdock100 Před 3 měsíci +8

    "Take her off the monitor, I don't want to see her face." 😂😂😂

  • @andytaylor5636
    @andytaylor5636 Před 8 měsíci +5

    Doon Mackichan never fails to make me laugh. If she’s in it, I’ll watch it. From .”The Day Today” to “Plebs” she’s never failed.
    Such a brilliant actress.

  • @steveforest8385
    @steveforest8385 Před 8 lety +139

    I knew long before it's collapse that the writing was on the wall for Watney Heckbulb. That's why I sold up and invested in Spackhandy Choptubes.

    • @Bhodisatvas
      @Bhodisatvas Před 8 lety +20

      +Steve Forest I tried to put all my holdings into Securivag but the market opening was too small and the currency susan was not in my favour at all.

    • @kisbie
      @kisbie Před 5 lety +1

      I like how you can tell which of Morris, Iannucci and Dumpy Susan Baynham came up with which company name.

    • @steveforest8385
      @steveforest8385 Před 3 lety +4

      @@Bhodisatvas No insider trading going off there then?

    • @olaf7441
      @olaf7441 Před 3 lety +16

      I was confused at first because you abbreviated their full name from Watney Heckbulb uhhhhhhhhh.

    • @sarahdixon6011
      @sarahdixon6011 Před 3 lety +1

      Me too.

  • @Desmaad
    @Desmaad Před 13 lety +72

    She's creepy in her sheer blandness. Her blatantly artificial and inappropriate smirking once every episode and increasingly odd behaviour make it worse!

  • @garrick3727
    @garrick3727 Před 3 lety +40

    This never gets old. They show these clips in Finance Correspondent Training School.

  • @TJDious
    @TJDious Před 2 lety +13

    She deserves to be ennobled for being able to deliver this with a straight face.

  • @GrahamMilkdrop
    @GrahamMilkdrop Před 4 lety +195

    I remember not being able to watch the news in the same way I had become accustomed to after watching this show. The delivery is so spot on that it was indistinguishable from the real thing and for the first time in my life I understood that the news was a tool constructed for the purpose of creating a state of mind in the viewer and not for informing them.
    Bravo to the team for doing such a great job! Thank god for people like them!

    • @marcraygun6290
      @marcraygun6290 Před 3 lety +6

      My mum thought the pound being stolen was real.....

    • @realSethMeyers
      @realSethMeyers Před 2 lety +13

      🤣 Now this is some "I'm 14 and this is deep" content right here ^

    • @GrahamMilkdrop
      @GrahamMilkdrop Před 2 lety +3

      @T P I wasn't aware I was being graded!

    • @GrahamMilkdrop
      @GrahamMilkdrop Před 2 lety +2

      @@realSethMeyers 1994 was so long ago that they hadn't come up with the 'I'm 14 and this is deep' meme.
      I was actually 19 and yes... for me, it was deep.

    • @robair67
      @robair67 Před 2 lety +1

      This comment becomes increasingly true for an ever greater number of people, as the fake news media get their international finance arse handed to them, on a daily basis, due to their woeful inability to make fact into doubt "go".

  • @spacechief2000
    @spacechief2000 Před 8 lety +111

    Just to remind everyone that this is Doon Mackichan, who was also in Smack the Pony, well worth watching all of her other stuff.

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 8 lety +21

      She was amazing in Green Wing. One of my fave comedians! I edited and uploaded this years ago because no one else had, and every now and then someone comments and I get notified, bringing me back here. I still piss myself watching it. Every time.

    • @kaukaumooo
      @kaukaumooo Před 8 lety +4

      +espertron Doon Mackichan wasn't in Green Wing, unless you're referring to the unaired pilot

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 8 lety +10

      +Kau カウ イリアム holy shit you're right, I totally had her mixed up with Michelle Gomez who has a really similar comedic style. Soon was awesome in Smack the Pony though!

    • @abbaszaidi8371
      @abbaszaidi8371 Před 5 lety +11

      I still picture Doon undressing in front of Alan Partridge after dressage. A real lady

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 5 lety +3

      @@matthewlamont4111 Really? Huh. Oh well. I borrowed the complete DVD box set from a friend and digitised it onto my MacBookPro back when they used to have DVD drives built into them, and I thought I had captured all the clips. But I posted this over 9 years ago, and I have neither the hardware, software, time, or will to put this right. Please accept my apologies!

  • @vdd
    @vdd Před 12 lety +58

    "A rather cowy night for the pound, it's 0.79 down against the German Bordello and 100 down against The Bitch"
    Classic!

  • @Lytton333
    @Lytton333 Před 10 lety +31

    Hey, Collaterlie..
    More news..
    The Bildungsroman vacuumed six notches against the Croatian Gnocci, whilst trading murmurs brought a swift bileback on the backwards futuring markets on the Yangtse index finger charts...

  • @deanandthebeans857
    @deanandthebeans857 Před 3 lety +29

    Brilliant! What anyone who doesn't understand economics actually hears from the financial news

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 3 lety +11

      Let's take a quick look at the International Finance Arse

    • @mfeltes
      @mfeltes Před 3 lety +10

      To be fair, it's also what you hear once you understand economics very well.

  • @wohltemper
    @wohltemper Před 11 lety +120

    We covered these topics when I did my finance MBA, but to be honest I never really got a firm grasp of the International Finance Arse.

    • @JustinBenn
      @JustinBenn Před 4 lety +13

      Sounds succulent. Chris.

    • @wohltemper
      @wohltemper Před 3 lety +1

      ettlz yes you don’t want to rub them up the wrong way...

    • @BossySwan
      @BossySwan Před 2 lety +1

      Spackhandy Chop Tubes

    • @seang3019
      @seang3019 Před 2 lety +1

      Perfectly simple: 4

    • @llary
      @llary Před 2 lety

      @@JustinBenn Chris.

  • @ShmaerkWards
    @ShmaerkWards Před 2 lety +9

    Watching this again after Blade Runner 2049, Luv suddenly reminded of Collaterlie Sisters.

  • @thomascassidy2724
    @thomascassidy2724 Před 10 lety +48

    The Currency Susan broke me

    • @garethhughes6739
      @garethhughes6739 Před 2 lety +5

      You spotted that the plain, dumpy Susan with bad ears is Peter Bayham in drag, right?!

    • @thomascassidy2724
      @thomascassidy2724 Před 17 dny

      @@garethhughes6739 good god, I didn't. wow!

  • @cmciaranmasterson
    @cmciaranmasterson Před 6 lety +23

    Doon Mackichan, in her role as "Collaterlie Sisters", is the spitting image of former ITN newscaster Sue Carpenter.

  • @Jim17735
    @Jim17735 Před 3 lety +20

    When you are watching this and really wish you hadn't got rid of your Day Today DVDs about 6years ago

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 3 lety +8

      When you borrowed your friend's dvd, ripped and uploaded this 11 years ago and wish you'd just uploaded the whole thing :(

    • @lozinja
      @lozinja Před 3 měsíci

      The whole series is still available on dvd for a few quid

  • @billgreen576
    @billgreen576 Před 2 lety +8

    Perfect. Sounds like every finance report ever. In the same category of giving national traffic reports on the radio.

  • @maxallen3438
    @maxallen3438 Před 9 měsíci +4

    I’d love to hear Collaterlie doing the Shipping Forecast.

  • @AsinineComment
    @AsinineComment Před 2 lety +10

    Never seen this character before.... This is / was *genius level* acting (and writing)!

  • @bruceleeharveyoswald5104
    @bruceleeharveyoswald5104 Před 5 lety +12

    Crap! I put all my money into Collected Breath Dumps. What a fool I've been.

  • @mrengulfeddirector
    @mrengulfeddirector Před 5 lety +27

    am i having a stroke or is this genius

  • @keyboarddancers7751
    @keyboarddancers7751 Před 2 lety +6

    Unbelievable and yet somehow believable!

  • @ewen4544
    @ewen4544 Před rokem +4

    Liz Truss saw this back in the day, absolutely.

  • @nelsonr32
    @nelsonr32 Před 12 lety +9

    "Only because you landed in somebody's stomach..."

  • @cheeseontoast9418
    @cheeseontoast9418 Před 6 lety +37

    1:53 whatney heckbulb uwwwwwh

    • @ph1980
      @ph1980 Před 5 lety +1

      I want to invest in them!!!

    • @CharlieFlemingOriginal
      @CharlieFlemingOriginal Před 9 měsíci

      ​@@ph1980DON'T all the burping dragged the company down. 😮

  • @Dead-Ball-Situation
    @Dead-Ball-Situation Před 2 lety +7

    I love her deliberately robotic caricature, which malfunctions now and again.
    Chris.

  • @michaeljames8531
    @michaeljames8531 Před 6 lety +8

    If it weren’t for Edgeledge Wedgebarge’s strong IPO on the NASDAQ the collapse of Lehman’s would’ve wiped me out. Made a killing.

  • @RatPfink66
    @RatPfink66 Před 7 lety +120

    My god was this woman sexy. And not just because she spouted random inanities with the polish of a professional journalist. Chris.

  • @aodhablackheart
    @aodhablackheart Před 2 lety +6

    She's so chaotic, like a malfunctioning robot :)

  • @JuliusCaribou
    @JuliusCaribou Před 4 lety +7

    The pound flubbed today by 4 Pascals and caused my shares in Chubley Gaslimbs to vibrate down to 3.4.

  • @rumourhats
    @rumourhats Před 2 lety +2

    It was Britain that started trading with itself.

  • @firedragonosis
    @firedragonosis Před 2 lety +4

    YOU DO IT! GET IT NOW! NO, YOU GET IT, IT'S OVER THERE!

  • @rp6398
    @rp6398 Před 3 lety +15

    I desperately want an Iggy Pop £5 note 😂

    • @tcraigh1
      @tcraigh1 Před 3 lety +1

      They need to release one even if it’s a limited edition

    • @morningstar9233
      @morningstar9233 Před 2 měsíci

      Might've happened if Bowie Bank (remember that?) hadn't died in the arse.

  • @andyroocraig
    @andyroocraig Před 13 lety +16

    Just unfeasibly brilliant...

    • @jd00313
      @jd00313 Před 3 lety

      Just found this because you recommended it in your book :)

    • @andrewcraig2183
      @andrewcraig2183 Před 3 lety

      @@jd00313 Haha. Glad to hear. Did you find it funny?

    • @explained3275
      @explained3275 Před rokem

      Yes, the brilliance just cannot be feased. 😆

  • @TomboBrewster
    @TomboBrewster Před měsícem

    I've always wanted to do "In summary then oh no" in my monthly finance reports 😆

  • @keelerrobinson5772
    @keelerrobinson5772 Před 2 lety +2

    Watney, Heckbulb, Uhhhhhhhh I lost it

  • @austinwoods466
    @austinwoods466 Před 3 lety +11

    Doon Mackichan would make a great 14th Doctor.

  • @phill80
    @phill80 Před rokem +1

    I lost it at ‘spak-handy chop tubs’. 😂

  • @EyeofAffinado
    @EyeofAffinado Před 2 lety +1

    I have a Lucinda Childs deadpan deliverance that makes my eyes smile.
    Chris. CHRIS

  • @lyxnick
    @lyxnick Před 2 lety +6

    Ugh, can't believe I invested all my money when there was a unified arse. Lost loads of money.

  • @KokoBWary
    @KokoBWary Před rokem +1

    Lot of people commenting on the surrealness of the smirks, but oddly enough the delivery is a pretty much note perfect impression of the style all the market correspondents on the news used to adopt at that time, bizarre little half smirks included.

  • @BarterTom
    @BarterTom Před 2 měsíci

    Creates the perfect characterisation of someone who is intensely self conscious on camera.

  • @jeffjefferson7384
    @jeffjefferson7384 Před 2 lety +6

    I want her back to explain Bitcoin and NFTs :)

  • @AmaPupiI
    @AmaPupiI Před 2 lety +1

    Had to watch this immediately when someone mentioned the term "Core PCE Deflator" at a finance conference...

    • @AmaPupiI
      @AmaPupiI Před 2 lety +1

      "In the current market, I think that looks really, really good in costless collar format, where a bank buys a floor to sell a cap and sell for a cap strike that makes their dealer indifferent between selling the floor and buying the cap."... You really couldn't make this stuff up...

  • @RafaelLSmith
    @RafaelLSmith Před 9 lety +25

    Chris

  • @set1237
    @set1237 Před 2 lety +3

    That smirk.

  • @johnking5174
    @johnking5174 Před rokem +1

    Anyone who has ever seen CNBC channel knows this is what watching a business news channel is like.

  • @cogtroper
    @cogtroper Před 11 měsíci +1

    When colaterlie sisters started yelling at 1:34 it did things to me and I am very confused

  • @_Ben4810
    @_Ben4810 Před 5 měsíci +1

    Collaterlie Sisters...She forever sits on the shoulder of the BBC's Tania Beckett & Mariko Oi.....Chris...

  • @stephenmcconnell1000
    @stephenmcconnell1000 Před 8 lety +35

    In summary then Oh no.

    • @kisbie
      @kisbie Před 5 lety +4

      “Chris.”

    • @MrEAus
      @MrEAus Před 4 lety

      At least she was able to summarise it with words, unlike Spartacus Mills who struggled to summarise with a sound...

  • @simonray4373
    @simonray4373 Před 5 lety +14

    I want an Iggy Pop fiver

    • @kowskizury
      @kowskizury Před 2 lety +2

      You will only be able to use it once unfortunately

  • @An_Arbitrary_Miscellany

    The "Chris... Chris... " at 1:58 is so good.

  • @BossySwan
    @BossySwan Před 3 lety +1

    *THANKS CHRIS*

  • @BOABModels
    @BOABModels Před 11 měsíci

    Doon Mackichan was in Good Omens as the Archangel Michael - another bizarre, cold, alienesque performance she nailed.

  • @bertrandbunatz1765
    @bertrandbunatz1765 Před 3 lety +2

    Chris, Chris. On now to the money markets and a quick look at the international finance arse.

  • @boozerverif
    @boozerverif Před 12 lety +12

    @Desmaad
    The reason Chris Morris is a champ: I've seen many newsanchors who are exactly as awkwardly bland as Collaterlie. It's dead on.

  • @robair67
    @robair67 Před 2 lety +1

    "...with bad ears" kills me!

  • @eldubya7972
    @eldubya7972 Před rokem +2

    Tbh I’m in love with her

  • @claudiaxander
    @claudiaxander Před rokem +2

    Oh those were the good old days!
    Now economic news is riddled with irrational nonsense !!!

  • @williem1710
    @williem1710 Před měsícem

    Doon Mackichan is as talented as her name suggests.

  • @TheBarnem13
    @TheBarnem13 Před 7 lety +6

    Damn Troublefinchdusky holdings I should have invested in spackhandychop tubes and I would now be a German Bordello millonare looks like I'll have to move everything into the Portugese starling and hope for the best in summary then OH NO......Chris

    • @alexa1591
      @alexa1591 Před 2 lety

      Should have banked with the bitch

  • @BossySwan
    @BossySwan Před 13 lety +2

    Sevurivaj and United Haha. Great company names!

  • @paulwarren6105
    @paulwarren6105 Před 5 lety +11

    Collaterlie Sisters 💖💖💖💖

  • @mandafitzsimons
    @mandafitzsimons Před 11 lety +32

    "only because you landed in somebody's stomach"

    • @krispy3790
      @krispy3790 Před 4 lety +1

      im dead

    • @MrEAus
      @MrEAus Před 4 lety +1

      @@krispy3790 ...as is the person once attached to said stomach...

  • @applemask
    @applemask Před 11 lety +13

    FOUR.

  • @FallNorth
    @FallNorth Před 25 dny

    I often look back with regret than I never bought into Securivag when they were cheap :(

  • @michaelsnow7252
    @michaelsnow7252 Před 6 lety +1

    and now she voices the top 100 whatever on channel 5

  • @GoodWoIf
    @GoodWoIf Před 3 lety +3

    I think I finally understand the "landed in someone's stomach." I thought it was some kind of fat joke I wasn't getting understanding for the longest time.

    • @jamie150741
      @jamie150741 Před 2 lety +1

      What is it?

    • @estebanvasquez2307
      @estebanvasquez2307 Před 2 lety

      Yeah, you gotta tell us what is it. That she's a "heavy" person?

    • @GoodWoIf
      @GoodWoIf Před 2 lety +5

      @@estebanvasquez2307 ​ @jamie150741 Sorry guys I should've added that in.
      I think the joke is she "landed in someone's stomach" means he was saying if she would get into a car crash she'd "land in somebody's stomach" because she'd have her head down in someone's lap, in other words giving someone a blowie. He's saying she's loose or a whore.

    • @estebanvasquez2307
      @estebanvasquez2307 Před 2 lety

      @@GoodWoIf Hahahahaha holy, I think you're right. Definitely makes sense.

    • @mfeltes
      @mfeltes Před rokem

      "It's not an experience which I can see catching on, but neither is it one I regret."

  • @Dipuzon
    @Dipuzon Před 11 lety +11

    further bad news for Watney Heck Bulb owhwhwhwh

  • @privatehand
    @privatehand Před 8 lety

    That's rather good.

  • @Teeb2023
    @Teeb2023 Před rokem +1

    This is just so completely and utterly yes. It has all the yesses.

  • @oscartravis5740
    @oscartravis5740 Před 7 lety +19

    The Tories and DUP formed a unified arse only today

  • @JappaKneads
    @JappaKneads Před 5 lety +4

    Forex trading favours the Sambla/Viochen pairs...market volatility catapults the entrenchment levels to the retraceable fibonaccis. A great day for trading...

  • @changer_of_ways_999
    @changer_of_ways_999 Před 2 lety +4

    This is complete nonsense. I love it.

  • @wishingwell12345
    @wishingwell12345 Před 2 lety +1

    I wish I hadn't sunk all my savings into Watney-Heckbulb-urrrrrrrrrgh. Been living in a box ever since. I suppose I could go round someone's house and just clean up.

    • @espertron
      @espertron  Před 2 lety +2

      😂 my sympathies…
      11 years since I uploaded this and it’s the gift that keeps on giving. I love getting these sort of comments in my inbox every few weeks.

  • @kellypaws
    @kellypaws Před 4 lety +12

    Uncanny skill from Doon.

  • @walterzamalis4846
    @walterzamalis4846 Před 2 lety +1

    I haven’t heard someone talk like her since before I could understand English properly

  • @kyleyuen245
    @kyleyuen245 Před 3 lety +19

    0:18 that near crack to recovery is insane

    • @nottimhortons
      @nottimhortons Před 2 lety +9

      No, it’s on purpose.

    • @TorilAzzalini-Machecler
      @TorilAzzalini-Machecler Před 2 lety +3

      This wasn't live, so if she'd cracked they would have reshot. This was an acting decision

    • @andymassingham
      @andymassingham Před 2 lety +1

      The day today was the opposite of Improv. Impeccably rehearsed and performed.

    • @Laundry_Hamper
      @Laundry_Hamper Před 2 lety

      There's another after 1:04

    • @micahnewman
      @micahnewman Před 2 lety +2

      The smirks at random times (at random random things) are part of the act.

  • @MCBhangramuffin
    @MCBhangramuffin Před rokem

    "only because you landed in somebody's stomach!"

  • @LouiseBrooksBob
    @LouiseBrooksBob Před 3 lety +2

    In summary then: "oh no!"

  • @lesact
    @lesact Před 2 lety +3

    I am in awe of their talent :-)

  • @leeosborne3793
    @leeosborne3793 Před rokem

    The International Finance Arse needs to be a thing.

  • @paulwarren9854
    @paulwarren9854 Před 3 lety +3

    I am still in Love.! 😉😍

  • @oldmordim
    @oldmordim Před 2 lety

    The best :)

  • @obsidiandeluxe4474
    @obsidiandeluxe4474 Před 3 lety +2

    In summary, then:
    *Oh no*

  • @QuizWriterMark
    @QuizWriterMark Před rokem

    This is how all business news sounds to me

  • @godskitchen82
    @godskitchen82 Před 12 lety +8

    Whatney heck bulb errrrrrrrrrrr

  • @JustinBenn
    @JustinBenn Před 4 lety +4

    Edgeledge Wedgebudge.

  • @FallNorth
    @FallNorth Před 25 dny

    Thinking about it, you don't get this sort of news, it used to be a thing, on the normal news anyway? (I'm sure satellite business channels still do). The financial news used to be a normal segment in the main news like the BBC and this is ripping at it. Now I suppose you have the internet so anyone intersted in live FTSE or currency movements has it on a screen in 30 seconds anyway, so the broadcasters feel less need to condense it into a summary like this.
    The last years the main BBC news generally will only cover things like movements in the pound or FTSE etc when they see they might be able to pin it on Brexit and say "Brexit bad" or something similar. I.e. When it's a lever the BBC can pull to nudge opinion in a BBC compliant direction.
    Also they can't afford to employ Currency Susan anymore as they needed all the German Bordello the can stuff into an envelope to fund Gary Linekers next sports car.

  • @hankhardigan1104
    @hankhardigan1104 Před 2 lety

    Those scripted smirks are beautiful

  • @geeblanco
    @geeblanco Před 12 lety +8

    Quote from the video

  • @joeritchie7286
    @joeritchie7286 Před 2 lety +1

    Divine Doon

  • @RealityCheck6T9
    @RealityCheck6T9 Před 5 lety +2

    The peseta burst open at four

  • @seang3019
    @seang3019 Před 2 lety +1

    Watney Heck Bulb Errrrrrrr...

  • @CornedBeefSurprise
    @CornedBeefSurprise Před 11 lety +3

    In summary then oh no.

  • @spats67
    @spats67 Před 11 lety +9

    Has she ever looked sexier?