Everything Wrong With Jack Reacher In 13 Minutes Or Less

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  • čas přidán 17. 10. 2016
  • Jack Reacher is such a bad-ass he PUNCHED his way to a sequel. And given said sequel is upon us at last... we went looking for sins in his original adventure.
    Thursday: Horror sins! Ah--Satan!
    Remember, no movie is without sin! Which movie's sins should we expose next?!
    Podcast: / cinemasins
    Sins Video Playlist: • Everything Wrong With ...
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    Tumble us: / cinema-sins
    Call us: 405-459-7466
    Jeremy's book now available: theablesbook.com Merch: teespring.com/stores/cinemasi...
  • Krátké a kreslené filmy

Komentáře • 3,7K

  • @maxman1602
    @maxman1602 Před 7 lety +158

    3:24 No, you didn't. You questioned why there were parking meters in a parking garage. You did not ask why he would pay for parking.

    • @diegocamacho6477
      @diegocamacho6477 Před 7 lety +32

      Ding

    • @datbtrue
      @datbtrue Před 7 lety +5

      Exactly Maxman ! Which actually did exist 15-20 years ago and still are around in certain parking garages. My hometown of Toronto , Ontario, Canada has a few

    • @soso-zz9qf
      @soso-zz9qf Před 7 lety +1

      Hey I'm from Toronto! Where exactly in Toronto are these?... I've never seem them in T.O...

    • @andrewrogers6197
      @andrewrogers6197 Před 7 lety +1

      maxman1602 He meant why would he bother since he's going to leave anyway.

  • @briankoger29
    @briankoger29 Před 5 lety +73

    As someone born and raised in Pittsburgh, I can genuinely tell you that a Port Authority bus driver would honestly give zero fucks about the cops coming on a street and would still run their route.

  • @Dizzy247365plus
    @Dizzy247365plus Před 6 lety +623

    U missed one, Sins. When ur sitting on a bus next to the guy who gave you his hat to help you hide from the cops...WHY WOULD YOUUU TAKE THE WINDOW SEAT AND RISK BEING SPOTTED???? I'm sure the guy ur sitting next to would have switched places--since HE HELPED YOU FROM THE START!!

    • @evaburnz
      @evaburnz Před 5 lety +2

      W

    • @EvilTwin123
      @EvilTwin123 Před 5 lety +20

      DING
      point for you

    • @EvilTwin123
      @EvilTwin123 Před 5 lety +11

      Mostly because the beverage cart whaps your elbow.
      Window seat for life, yo!
      #Windowseat
      I now have to go make food then photograph it for my electronic "friends"

    • @langeweile3388
      @langeweile3388 Před 4 lety +11

      @@EvilTwin123 what kinda busses do you take where they got beverage carts

    • @bentramer6835
      @bentramer6835 Před 4 lety +2

      Window seat is life.

  • @joshuadonnelly1978
    @joshuadonnelly1978 Před 4 lety +39

    The Zec, a character who has stressed the importance of saying and/or doing whatever it takes to stay alive, says a bunch of words to Jack Reacher that are 100% guaranteed to make Reacher kill him on the spot. (DING)

  • @kingofwakanda6899
    @kingofwakanda6899 Před 7 lety +83

    Rosamund Pike goes from this performance to Gone Girl. What a turn.

    • @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING
      @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING Před 7 lety +5

      Wait so was her performance considered really bad here or really bad in gone girl? (I haven't seen gone girl btw)

    • @OskarIng
      @OskarIng Před 7 lety +9

      SteelRazorBlade // AdamSRB. She was seriously mindblowingly amazing in gone girl

    • @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING
      @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING Před 7 lety

      Óskar Ingólfsson oh ok

    • @Virru112
      @Virru112 Před 7 lety +3

      King of Wakanda she was pregnanf during this movie. Hence her shots were all close shots or her sitting down

    • @landerstyle100
      @landerstyle100 Před 7 lety

      YES YES YES

  • @rafaelalodio5116
    @rafaelalodio5116 Před 7 lety +462

    When a movie has less than 100 sins you know it is not that bad.

    • @aidanburke1387
      @aidanburke1387 Před 7 lety +17

      Or so bad that he wouldn't devote enough time for a normal episode for it. It's good in this case.

    • @joshlittle8488
      @joshlittle8488 Před 7 lety +28

      the movie is over 2 hours long and had less than 100 sins. its not that bad of a movie

    • @Lorenzo_631
      @Lorenzo_631 Před 7 lety +24

      you guys know the sins don't really mean anything

    • @nathanielholland-pass4618
      @nathanielholland-pass4618 Před 7 lety +10

      Rafael Alódio saw the opening scene in this video, closed it, went and watched the movie and came back, instantly one of my favourites

    • @jjjkoy
      @jjjkoy Před 7 lety +2

      tom cruise was in it so awful by default

  • @laharacost
    @laharacost Před 5 lety +144

    5:55 “But no one outside the church is supposed to know that”
    Now that’s a good line. It cracked me up once I got it. Bravo 👏

    • @nelsonx5326
      @nelsonx5326 Před 2 lety

      I didn't get it. If you survived the pandemic please explain the joke to me.

    • @nelsonx5326
      @nelsonx5326 Před 2 lety

      Wait, the Church of Scientology? But it still doesn't make sense to me.

    • @ap001209
      @ap001209 Před 2 lety +3

      @@nelsonx5326 Yeah the church of scientology. From what ive heard theyve got dirt on a lot of people which means they cant leave, blackmail if you will. I guess the joke could reference that.

    • @kevinpatrickcarey3741
      @kevinpatrickcarey3741 Před rokem

      was worried Cinemasins was gonna vanish

  • @roshi98
    @roshi98 Před 6 lety +99

    A very good film, solid performances, chemistry between the leads, convincing supporting cast, an interesting plot, nice pacing, satisfying end to bad guys. Wasn't perfect, but it's a movie I can easily put on during a rainy day and watch every so often.

  • @lolitsmatt
    @lolitsmatt Před 7 lety +586

    7:57 "Someone who could kill that girl with one punch..."
    Saitama.

    • @MXCN_El1011
      @MXCN_El1011 Před 7 lety +4

      My thoughts exactly.

    • @clyde9266
      @clyde9266 Před 7 lety +10

      ONE PUNCH

    • @batman4581
      @batman4581 Před 7 lety +33

      OOONNNEEE PUUUNNNNCCHHHH!!!!!!!

    • @obinnaonyeije
      @obinnaonyeije Před 7 lety +16

      Really wish that'd been an outtake.

    • @Xstar7
      @Xstar7 Před 7 lety +3

      lolitsmatt I was just about to say that

  • @danielniemeyer1987
    @danielniemeyer1987 Před 4 lety +382

    if having 40 seconds of wasted space for logos in an 1.5 hour movie is a sin then what is 8 seconds in a13 minute video?

    • @vinayfilms.
      @vinayfilms. Před 4 lety +15

      Classic reply

    • @DreadX10
      @DreadX10 Před 3 lety +5

      One you paid for (40s), the other was free (8s).

    • @andrewsercer9538
      @andrewsercer9538 Před 3 lety +19

      easy: 40 seconds divided by 1.5 hours is 0.74074074...% and 8 seconds divided by 13 minutes is ~1.0256% ... so if the 40 seconds out of the movie = 1 sin, then the 8 seconds of this video = ~1.385 sins

    • @bruno1700
      @bruno1700 Před 3 lety +4

      LISTEN HERE MATE...ITS SAID TO SAY BUT YOUD BE GREAT AT CINEMASINS

    • @ctakitimu
      @ctakitimu Před 3 lety +4

      @@bruno1700 "Said" to say?

  • @BMRTV
    @BMRTV Před 4 lety +40

    #1 Sin. Giving away the actual shooter when the whole point of this story was to prove the ex soldier was the killer only to uncover that he wasn't

  • @felipecarrera9127
    @felipecarrera9127 Před 2 lety +68

    The biggest sin is casting tiny bit Tom Cruise as Jack Reacher a 6’5 mountain of man

    • @thememers_dude
      @thememers_dude Před 2 lety +9

      Yom killed it in this movie

    • @felipecarrera9127
      @felipecarrera9127 Před 2 lety +4

      @@thememers_dude killed this movie. He was bad

    • @willnailer2118
      @willnailer2118 Před rokem +1

      I didn't think he could pull it off but he did.

    • @marcintosh4040
      @marcintosh4040 Před rokem

      he did a better job. go cry

    • @552jacki3
      @552jacki3 Před rokem +3

      I mean acting wise I think he did a great job but couldn't they have at least given him a box to stand on or some shit? Like half the scenes in the movie he's standing next to another character that's obviously taller than him which makes it very hard to find him even intimidating, no less the absolute beast that Reacher is in the books.

  • @RANDOMNATION150
    @RANDOMNATION150 Před 7 lety +1320

    Jack Reacher, Jason Bourne, and John Wick walk into a club...

    • @R0ADSTER
      @R0ADSTER Před 7 lety +245

      What the heck do you have against James Bond?

    • @antenna_prolly
      @antenna_prolly Před 7 lety +70

      Cool J's.

    • @iweegouldyi8466
      @iweegouldyi8466 Před 7 lety +114

      RANDOMNATION! Only Wick would survive

    • @RANDOMNATION150
      @RANDOMNATION150 Před 7 lety +40

      iWeeGouldyi Jason Bourne is a super soldier, But he can't beat Reacher and Wick together.

    • @iweegouldyi8466
      @iweegouldyi8466 Před 7 lety +8

      Forgot he's a super soldier

  • @Majin13David
    @Majin13David Před 7 lety +36

    Am I the only one who thinks that Jason Bourne v Jack Reacher would be a badass movie?

    • @moShi1004
      @moShi1004 Před 7 lety +4

      Majin13David Jason Bourne vs Jack Reacher vs Ethan Hunt vs James Bond
      Who would win??

    • @AmanBadami
      @AmanBadami Před 7 lety +10

      But ..but... Jack Reacher and Ethan Hunt are played by the same character

    • @LJPMotorsports
      @LJPMotorsports Před 7 lety +8

      신은찰 Tom Cruise would outnumber them. The two Cruise's would be a hell of a team. It's like they're in each other's heads.

    • @grimthane
      @grimthane Před 7 lety +14

      John Wick would win, with a fucking pencil.

    • @sleepypanda9928
      @sleepypanda9928 Před 7 lety +3

      Depends on the scenario, if they are allowed help from friends Ethan Hunt has got the best back up team, whereas the others work alone mostly. If they're on their own I'm backing Jason Bourne for the win, dude is fucking indestructible.

  • @QuantumLeap83
    @QuantumLeap83 Před 5 lety +21

    Having been a fan of the books for decades, and read all of them, the hardest part for me is that they chose a guy that's 5' 5" to play a guy that's 6' 5". I just can't get past that. Nothing against Tom.

    • @MarvelousMusicmmusic
      @MarvelousMusicmmusic Před 10 měsíci +2

      Many different people played James Bond and most don't fit the physical description of what Ian Fleming wrote. STILL great films. Why can't you get over it?

    • @QuantumLeap83
      @QuantumLeap83 Před 10 měsíci

      @@MarvelousMusicmmusic necroposter

    • @FairyNuffMuffin2
      @FairyNuffMuffin2 Před 9 měsíci +2

      ​@@MarvelousMusicmmusicbecause one of the points of Jack reacher and alot of character interactions are based on the fact that he's built like a truck and truly looks like he could kill a guy with a punch, but also that he's underestimated with regards to his intelligence because of his appearance.

    • @fangman21
      @fangman21 Před 5 měsíci +1

      @@FairyNuffMuffin2 I like Tom Cruise and think he did a fine job in this film, but I def FEEL the Reacher vibe waaay more watching the Amazon series, because like you said, the man is supposed to be huge and intimidating.

  • @Durwood71
    @Durwood71 Před 2 lety +19

    Tom Cruise actually took that hit to the back of the head with the baseball bat. They practiced it so that the wall would absorb most of the force, but he still felt it. Dude is committed.

  • @da_shadowwarrior8613
    @da_shadowwarrior8613 Před 7 lety +61

    This video shouldn't be as long as it was. This movie was excellent

    • @Syrange13
      @Syrange13 Před 7 lety +16

      There is no proven correlation between movie quality and sin count. The more you know!

    • @TedFausak
      @TedFausak Před 7 lety

      Da_ShadowWarrior yeah, I was sad when it was over cause I wanted more!

    • @cmdraftbrn
      @cmdraftbrn Před 7 lety +7

      no movie is without sin.

    • @Rinsakaa
      @Rinsakaa Před 7 lety +7

      This movie was boring.

    • @saucybackport
      @saucybackport Před 7 lety

      this movie was made for retards that don't like Ethan Hunt movies

  • @deadtona5899
    @deadtona5899 Před 7 lety +33

    "He does take it black , but no one outside the church is supposed to know that " best part of the vid😂😂

    • @seanyboston
      @seanyboston Před měsícem

      I didn't get this, what is he trying to say Cruise is into?

  • @happysavage6660
    @happysavage6660 Před 5 lety +12

    "Don't taze me bro!"
    Nearly every movie I have seen thus far, reminds me, that people like to taze another, because they are doing bad and/or to capture someone.

  • @OverlandOne
    @OverlandOne Před 5 lety +15

    "Don't taze me bro" at the very end. Classic.

  • @KenRulesLife
    @KenRulesLife Před 7 lety +13

    I'm from Pittsburgh, and I remember them filming this downtown. As I was coming home from work through the city, I saw him and an entire group of people working on the film, he was in a gray hoodie and jeans and he was with 2 others, practically surrounded by barricades and I said "Hey, that's Tom Cruise...holy shit, he's short as fuck." I remember being more impressed with the camera mounted Crown Victorias they used for chase scenes than seeing him.

    • @seanyboston
      @seanyboston Před měsícem

      He's also a billion times richer than you so keep seething

  • @notsaro
    @notsaro Před 7 lety +25

    Say what you will about this movie, but the opening scene was brilliant

  • @deborahhanna6640
    @deborahhanna6640 Před 5 lety +8

    "I'll drink your blood out of a boot." Might be the best line from any movie.

  • @peteringargiola6323
    @peteringargiola6323 Před 4 lety +13

    These Sins videos are frikkin' GOLD...I actually laughed out loud a few times...This has also helped me to shed even more of my ego, as I realized how clever others are in comparison to me, and how utterly numbed I was to almost all of the Sins, while I idiotically watched the movie with gushing glee...

  • @incendiary6243
    @incendiary6243 Před 7 lety +275

    be nice to Pittsburgh, we may not have the best skyline or the best buildings or the best museums or the- you know, nevermind, the only reason I like this place is because I was born here

    • @k1ngk4gl3
      @k1ngk4gl3 Před 6 lety

      Dogerus
      Thumbs up removed!
      Dammit, don't be coy, some of us have twitchy thumbs!

    • @christianrangel4979
      @christianrangel4979 Před 6 lety +18

      Fuk all y'all , that skyline is fukn amazing

    • @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg
      @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg Před 5 lety +2

      Haha...I hear you. Go Pittsburgh! Native to Native, that fork in the river is really distinguishable with the stupid tunnels and bridges. I wonder if they also filmed some stuff at the airport or in Etna while they were at it.

    • @chrisbandicoot9552
      @chrisbandicoot9552 Před 5 lety +5

      You got your own DLC in Fallout 3. I wish my city was in an awesome video game.

    • @ajarthatsred5649
      @ajarthatsred5649 Před 5 lety +2

      Dogerus fuck Pittsburgh

  • @No_nameOG
    @No_nameOG Před 7 lety +40

    As for 31, the defense attorney is required, by law, to be given all the information ( or discovery) that the prosecution would have. So, she would know the victims' stories if the prosecutor had done his job.

    • @skankhunt-wy9wy
      @skankhunt-wy9wy Před 2 lety

      Wrong. Hollywood trash.
      New evidence, and therefore evidence unknown by the defense, can be submitted immediately upon acceptance from the judge.

  • @odonnellj
    @odonnellj Před 4 lety +52

    You forgot the sin that Tom cruise is like 5'5 when he walks into the bar he is a head taller than everyone in there. Was this bar in the shire part of Pittsburgh?

    • @davea3641
      @davea3641 Před 4 lety +1

      😂😂

    • @kysike666
      @kysike666 Před 3 lety

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @Bad_At_Parties
      @Bad_At_Parties Před 3 lety +1

      Because Tom Cruise did all of his own stunts, the production had to give the stunt crew something to do, so those guys would take turns carrying Tom through scenes where he had to be walking and also let him stand on their shoulders for still dialogue heavy scenes to make him look taller than all the other performers.

    • @seanyboston
      @seanyboston Před měsícem

      He's 5'7" bro

  • @ibtgb2
    @ibtgb2 Před 3 lety +3

    I love the scene where the guy gives him his hat and like 3 other people shuffle over to block him. So good.

  • @MasterJunior93
    @MasterJunior93 Před 7 lety +124

    wow, i've never been this early to a cinemasins video.

  • @Batchall_Accepted
    @Batchall_Accepted Před 7 lety +352

    They should have sinned the fact that they got tom cruise, one of the shortest actors in the business, to play a character thats supposed to be 6'6 and 280

    • @Bloodhurl67
      @Bloodhurl67 Před 7 lety +10

      True, Dwayne johnson would be perfect!

    • @Bendrix27
      @Bendrix27 Před 7 lety +18

      My dad, who loves all the books, said that Vin Diesel would have been an ideal choice, even though his acting isn't amazing, he still fits the character.

    • @Bloodhurl67
      @Bloodhurl67 Před 7 lety +5

      Bendrix27 I feel vin diesel is also another great choice and tbh i think his acting is great!

    • @Bendrix27
      @Bendrix27 Před 7 lety +9

      Howya Doin
      Yeah, I just mean that most people don't think very highly of Vin's acting, I have no problem with it personally.
      I'm looking forward to the new XXX movie he'll be in, should be awesome. ;)

    • @MrSwanee11
      @MrSwanee11 Před 7 lety +12

      My family said a younger Dolf Lundgren would have been pretty perfect if his English was better lol.

  • @arhaantgupta1063
    @arhaantgupta1063 Před 5 lety +3

    ‘I would knock a sin off but I’m too busy laughing’. This is what I call a scene of the highest order

  • @willnailer3167
    @willnailer3167 Před 6 lety +4

    I didn't think he could do it, but tom cruise played reacher pretty good.

  • @princeshezy007
    @princeshezy007 Před 7 lety +37

    Saw that this video was uploaded, clicked it, found it interesting and realized I have not watched this movie. Paused at 35 seconds in the video, watched the entire movie, resumed the video and enjoyed myself thoroughly.
    Thank you
    &
    Have a nice day

  • @CouchTfilms
    @CouchTfilms Před 7 lety +607

    Really underrated! Watching the sequel this weekend!

    • @kierans5583
      @kierans5583 Před 7 lety +6

      Couch Tomato Cant wait, it was great!

    • @Aloyus_Knight
      @Aloyus_Knight Před 7 lety +2

      I'm going to on Friday.

    • @fudwgemar
      @fudwgemar Před 7 lety +2

      Couch Tomato i agree with you

    • @cristianrosas7090
      @cristianrosas7090 Před 7 lety +4

      No Tom Cruise movie is underrated lul. But same I'm going to WATCH IT FRIDAY MYSELF!

    • @ninjadudeofficial
      @ninjadudeofficial Před 7 lety +10

      As a huge fan of the books I disagree but if I were able to ignore them I'm sure it'd be different, and I also will be watching the sequel soon

  • @paintpink7300
    @paintpink7300 Před 6 lety +2

    Okay, this Cinema Sins officially made me laugh the hardest.

  • @jamesspannthecardreader
    @jamesspannthecardreader Před 2 lety +1

    The box that cruise stands on, to look the bad guy in the eye, or to kiss the leading lady? It's getting a lifetime achievement award.🤣😅😂

  • @tanishapattinama9721
    @tanishapattinama9721 Před 7 lety +80

    Do "Everything Wrong With Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children"

  • @ricogoldstar
    @ricogoldstar Před 7 lety +61

    Jack Reacher 2 vs. John Wick 2. My money is on John all the way!

    • @SarahSmith-xv5kd
      @SarahSmith-xv5kd Před 7 lety +4

      RICO GOLDSTAR reacher FTW

    • @Farenil_Silverhair
      @Farenil_Silverhair Před 7 lety +6

      RICO GOLDSTAR John Wick all the way

    • @kanejones99
      @kanejones99 Před 7 lety +2

      RICO GOLDSTAR John wick wins hands down, a lot better story and a work of art

    • @clapps611
      @clapps611 Před 7 lety +3

      Wow that will be the battle of the over 50's

    • @elektro3000
      @elektro3000 Před 7 lety +1

      Jack Reacher vs John Wick vs The Equalizer melee!!

  • @lordoftoxicity
    @lordoftoxicity Před 7 lety +8

    idk if you read any of the books, but a HUGE sin, worth many dings is that Jack Reacher would never fight someone when he has a weapon and they dont. Cool scene, but no, Jack doesnt do that

  • @alysiamerdavid-wasser9165

    I just saw this and came for the "THAT GUY COULD BE A MURDERER!" scene, lol!! J.R. just lets his car coast into an unmanned, (ding!) cop car blockade, hopped out, walked up to that crowd, and WUT?!😂

  • @alecdaley6105
    @alecdaley6105 Před 7 lety +152

    This movie is fantastic!
    Its sequel "Never Go Back" on the other hand was a sub-par undercooked Bourne wannabe.

    • @MrRenegadeshinobi
      @MrRenegadeshinobi Před 7 lety +11

      Alec Daley the book was so much better.

    • @younginator2012
      @younginator2012 Před 4 lety +6

      The movie has nothing on the books

    • @albo__7804
      @albo__7804 Před 4 lety +6

      @@younginator2012 true but I think killing floor is the best

    • @younginator2012
      @younginator2012 Před 4 lety +4

      @@albo__7804 killing floor is great😁

    • @Bookwitchery
      @Bookwitchery Před 4 lety +10

      I honestly couldn't watch this movie when it came out. In the books, Jack Reacher is 6'4" and depending on the book, weight ranges from 220 to 240. When the movie trailer hit the theaters, I laughed, loudly, when I realized Jack Reacher was Tom Cruise.

  • @taylorcoley6329
    @taylorcoley6329 Před 7 lety +36

    *CINEMASINS - SINS*
    *THUMBS UP!*
    *Sin 5- The caution cone was on purpose.*
    *Sin 7- Again the cone was done purposely.*
    *Sin 9- The quarter, like the cone was all done for a reason, by the bad guys.*
    *Sin 16- Really makes no sense at all.*
    *Sin 18- What? It's not really hard to obtain a .223 caliber rifle, anywhere.*
    *Sin 20- Well, they did have the actor pull a gun on her.*
    *Sin 25/26- Emerson only knew to check the quarter because he was in on the whole thing.*
    *Sin 30- Come one, that fight scene was bad-ass.*
    *Sin 46- Funny you should mention Mayberry. It was based on a town here in NC called Mount Airy. I live about 45 mins from it. If I were asked, there are only a few options that come to mind in the town I live in.*
    *Sin 53/54- Both really don't make sense at all.*
    *Sin 60/61/62- He was attempting to take her else where to kill her, but when she refused, so they had no choice but to do it there.*
    *Sin 80- But, isn't that a good thing?*
    *Sin 82/91- It was supposed to be sort of ritualistic for him. A worthy opponent.*
    *Sin 86- You ever tried shooting a target 6-10 inches in width moving at 45+ MPH? I'd liken it to duck hunting. It's NOT easy to do.*
    *Sin 90- Robert Duvall can say whatever he wants!*

    • @walkinparadox6908
      @walkinparadox6908 Před 7 lety +9

      Tl;dr

    • @marieb9048
      @marieb9048 Před 6 lety +1

      He just watched the movie, but didn't read the book. Or probably the narrator doesn't know it was base on a book.

  • @AEElmas
    @AEElmas Před 6 lety

    I really liked this channel, I'm coming back after every movie i see :D

  • @davidhooie4692
    @davidhooie4692 Před 5 lety +2

    The Olive Garden waiter line about made me spit my coffee out while watching this! ROFL!!

  • @madra214
    @madra214 Před 7 lety +6

    For the credit card thing , at 4:28 , she was buying her lover a watch and didnt want her husband finding out that her credit card was used at whatever store it was . So she said she was getting her car serviced and just took out cash saying thats where he was going to use it

  • @you238
    @you238 Před 7 lety +11

    9:39 I want to see "It's a Wonderful Life" done so each sin can be mitigated by an angel getting his wings.

  • @BackSeatHump
    @BackSeatHump Před 4 lety

    An exceptionally good video, CS!

  • @jackwarren1687
    @jackwarren1687 Před 4 lety

    I hope you guys make a nice living doing these videos! You've made me a better movie viewer, even if it's now impossible to hear anyone ever say "you should take a look at this" and not have a mild anger fit...

  • @LandonWard
    @LandonWard Před 7 lety +104

    I love the concept of cinema sins. And I love when you sin a movie I liked. But I can't sit through the videos anymore. It isn't concise enough for me. I get it, you're being thorough in your "sinning" and explaining your points. The timbre (maybe the eq) and constancy of the voice-over work really wears me down.
    Keep doing what you're doing. I just figured you'd want an honest opinion of someone who used to be a fan and kinda isn't anymore.

    • @EliLippy
      @EliLippy Před 7 lety +11

      Landon Ward Okay?

    • @LandonWard
      @LandonWard Před 7 lety +9

      Elijah Lipkins ??...

    • @fww7675
      @fww7675 Před 7 lety +19

      I like the longer videos... the ones that are several minutes long were leaving waaaay too much out. However, I get what you are saying.

    • @maxman1602
      @maxman1602 Před 7 lety +31

      I prefer the older videos where he actually identifies inconsistencies, plotholes, continuity errors and so forth.
      Now he just makes a mini RiffTrax where half the sins are jokes about the movie and most of the rest are irrelevant to the film's plot or enjoyability. It's fine if he wants to riff on a movie, he should just admit that's hat he's doing.

    • @minervaalexia6074
      @minervaalexia6074 Před 7 lety

      Yeah, it was kinda nice when they were more focused. Nowadays, I only really watch to the end if it's a film I'm interested in but not seeing.

  • @tinkerbell8704
    @tinkerbell8704 Před 7 lety +12

    Yo CinemaSins! Can we get a 'Everything Wrong With Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children'? (I know, it's a mouthful.)

    • @catmani2
      @catmani2 Před 7 lety

      Needs to come out on video first.

    • @tinkerbell8704
      @tinkerbell8704 Před 7 lety

      I see! Hopefully they'll have it out soon! :)

    • @polostud11
      @polostud11 Před 7 lety

      Tinker Bell spoiler alert "a lot"

  • @whyfoldnow9372
    @whyfoldnow9372 Před 4 lety +13

    "No one outside the church is supposed to know that" lmao

  • @shaylynneswanberg5101
    @shaylynneswanberg5101 Před 5 lety

    I love this movie and a lot of his movies so much and usually I would be offended by videos like this, but the commentary is SO FUNNY!!!

  • @jamyjet
    @jamyjet Před 7 lety +77

    really underrated movie

    • @alucardyoici
      @alucardyoici Před 7 lety +2

      I don't know it got good rating and a sequel

    • @jamyjet
      @jamyjet Před 7 lety +7

      alucardyoici it's probably because tom cruise doesn't match the description for jack reacher in the book, but the movie was great, can't wait to see the sequel

    • @chickenw1re
      @chickenw1re Před 7 lety +1

      Personally I thought it was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. It's weird how two people can have completely opposite views of the same thing.

    • @WiFilip
      @WiFilip Před 7 lety +2

      Yeah, I thought it was nothing too good, it was a stereotypical action movie, and was literally awful compared to the book.

    • @ninjadudeofficial
      @ninjadudeofficial Před 7 lety +3

      He wasn't even remotely similar, it's as if they didn't even read any of them

  • @codes5218
    @codes5218 Před 7 lety +35

    I enjoyed this movie better than most of the MI series movies, except Ghost Protocol

    • @octavianschaefer7294
      @octavianschaefer7294 Před 7 lety +5

      Code S rouge nation was kick ass too

    • @codes5218
      @codes5218 Před 7 lety +3

      Nathan Schaefer Oh yeah, I forgot about that one...but it was too similar in plot to either MI:1 or MI: 3... I forget which one.

    • @chanceneck8072
      @chanceneck8072 Před 7 lety +2

      MI: 3 was my favourite. 4 Had badass scenery and stunts, both probably better than 3, but most of the plot points, I just kept wondering "Huh?" or "What? Why is this happening again?"

    • @lesleybroadley3658
      @lesleybroadley3658 Před 7 lety

      Code S

    • @kleetus92
      @kleetus92 Před 7 lety +3

      This was a fun movie... to bad it featured Tom Cruise.

  • @skipprovandie318
    @skipprovandie318 Před 2 lety +2

    I love this movie, but this was too funny. Keep them coming.

  • @rydermccall3590
    @rydermccall3590 Před 7 lety +8

    Jack isn't drinking coffee.
    Jack isn't 6'5''
    Jack isn't 250 lbs
    Jack isn't drinking coffee
    Jack isn't insanely buff
    Jack does not comment how he hardly works out
    Jack isn't drinking coffee

  • @PushoverMediaCritic
    @PushoverMediaCritic Před 7 lety +200

    8:00 Hmm... someone who can kill in one punch. My money's on a bald 25-year-old Japanese man who was recently unemployed and walks around in a yellow jumpsuit and red cape.

    • @good000098
      @good000098 Před 5 lety +7

      Fucking weeb.

    • @good000098
      @good000098 Před 4 lety +1

      @Eric Rodriguez Bit late of a reply, but don't u have a to perfectly place your punch between your tiddies? *forgot the name of that place, lol*

    • @ladarriusjennings8914
      @ladarriusjennings8914 Před 4 lety +2

      good000098 Sternum.

    • @good000098
      @good000098 Před 4 lety +1

      @@ladarriusjennings8914 Yes, that... precisely.

    • @hellzila
      @hellzila Před 4 lety +2

      Coincidentally , its Saturday and there is a sale going on

  • @philippeperreault2604
    @philippeperreault2604 Před 6 lety +39

    Biggest sin for me was casting Tom Cruise to play a 6'5" character.

    • @pe.u.k3697
      @pe.u.k3697 Před 4 lety +4

      That was my primary reason NEVER to watch that movie. The character Jack Reacher is central to his height and physique so casting Tom Cruise killed the essence of the character 😒

    • @Dragonblaster1
      @Dragonblaster1 Před 3 lety

      Why not? Tom Cruise is 6" 5'.

    • @sjoormen1
      @sjoormen1 Před 3 lety

      When he stands on his wallet he is even bigger.

  • @MrPlazmaWalker
    @MrPlazmaWalker Před 7 lety +10

    I hate how people post their opinions on how they dislike this or anything else and are no longer going to watch it. ... like who the fuck cares no one is forcing you to watch this get the fuck on!

  • @spacesandshark2418
    @spacesandshark2418 Před 7 lety +278

    I don't know, I feel like he's kinda reaching in this video.

    • @Omotive
      @Omotive Před 6 lety +20

      That pun in itself is a sin.
      *ding*

    • @briancarroll481
      @briancarroll481 Před 6 lety +9

      Pun aside, I agree. Over half of these sins are clearly covered in the context of the scene or plot.

    • @jasoncarter1869
      @jasoncarter1869 Před 6 lety +6

      Pun................. approved.
      This movie only got 95 sins and THE EQUALIZER got like 140. John Wick had a son count around 100. Does CinemaSins hate Denzal Washington? 🤔

    • @danhughes1814
      @danhughes1814 Před 6 lety +2

      spacesandshark Welcome to Cinemasins

    • @johnbob5137
      @johnbob5137 Před 6 lety

      xD xD xD xD

  • @Grasfh
    @Grasfh Před 7 lety +86

    Not to mention the fact that the books make a point of how huge Jack Reacher is and how bad he is at driving...

    • @JaysUserName1
      @JaysUserName1 Před 7 lety +8

      Grasfh ikr. He's supposed to be 6'5. Tom Cruise is almost a foot shorter. I was so mad at that but I have to watch the movies by I'm a huge fan of the books :,)

    • @NorthernSeaWitch
      @NorthernSeaWitch Před 7 lety +9

      Yeah, there's no way they would have been able to cast someone who physically fit the book description of Reacher and could act and could deliver eyeballs/butts in seats. The author, Lee Child, himself said it was not happening so he was fine with Cruise.

    • @Grasfh
      @Grasfh Před 7 lety +1

      NorthernSeaWitch he does play the part well

    • @killercaos123
      @killercaos123 Před 7 lety +4

      What about Vinnie Jones? Just saying.

    • @Gobtik
      @Gobtik Před 7 lety +4

      +NorthernSeaWitch there are various actors of that sort of height who are box office big names and fit the Jack Reacher description or close to it:
      Dwayne Johnson (the Rock), Jason Segel, Ray Stevenson, Liam Neeson, Hugh Jackman
      Others that fit who are aren't as big a name as Cruise:
      Sean Bean, Viggo Mortensen, Hugo Weaving

  • @jordanw157
    @jordanw157 Před 6 lety

    Robert Duvall's character remembers Reacher from the Wimbeldon shooting competition because in the books, Reacher is one of the only soldiers (if not THE only soldier) from the Army that won the competition (the majority of the winners were from the Marines).

  • @joelouis321
    @joelouis321 Před 6 lety +20

    You forgot the biggest sin in the movie--the super villain's "super power", or main accomplishment, was that he gnawed off his own fingers.

  • @twoshadez9362
    @twoshadez9362 Před 7 lety +31

    Does anybody watch these instead of seeing the actual movies? He could be totally wrong and I wouldn't know.

    • @richardkranium2944
      @richardkranium2944 Před 6 lety +1

      I do. I usually watch these at least before the actual movie if possible. I've gone and watched a few I never would have watched until seeing these as well.

    • @neuro.weaver
      @neuro.weaver Před 6 lety +1

      Jack Reacher was over 6ft 5in. The moment I heard they cast the short crazy guy to portray him, I gave up on the movie.

  • @nitroneonicman
    @nitroneonicman Před 7 lety +140

    Jesus Christ it's Jack Reacher?

    • @3mmmmmm
      @3mmmmmm Před 5 lety +2

      Oh my god its Jason Bourne
      Jesus Christ its Jack Reacher
      RUN ITS JOHN WICK RUN!!!!

    • @sparksfly5877
      @sparksfly5877 Před 4 lety +1

      No

  • @knutkraus6089
    @knutkraus6089 Před 4 lety +5

    1:43 you forgot its tom cruise that said that. boi he can run 😂

  • @Kr0ml
    @Kr0ml Před 6 lety

    Hey dude, great show, i just watched "The Hit List" randomly on TV and immediately thought about you at minute 2 of the film. feeling intensified with each passing minute, please do a sins vid about that *insert any number of uncivilized adjectives* movie. best wishes :)

  • @johno1544
    @johno1544 Před 7 lety +541

    Reacher in the books is a 6'4'' blonde sin 1 is casting Tom Cruise

    • @nestorsdragon8057
      @nestorsdragon8057 Před 7 lety +45

      Lee Child liked the choice

    • @yayaooo
      @yayaooo Před 7 lety +66

      john o charisma is more important than height and weight

    • @retrasix1267
      @retrasix1267 Před 7 lety +12

      john o that's what imagination is for. Just imagine Tom to be taller and and blonde and boom u have jack

    • @canis39
      @canis39 Před 7 lety +67

      Lee Child liked the suitcases full of money he got from Tom Cruise's production company.

    • @BigSkippy1263
      @BigSkippy1263 Před 7 lety +15

      john and 250 pounds of muscle.

  • @lukewithann7256
    @lukewithann7256 Před 7 lety +117

    Everything wrong with jack reacher: Tom Cruise is Jack Reacher.

    • @LukeLavablade
      @LukeLavablade Před 7 lety +15

      He's perfect, except he's a foot too short.

    • @quimley2888
      @quimley2888 Před 7 lety +25

      In A Wanted Man he is described as follows: "He was one of the largest men she had ever seen outside the NFL. He was extremely tall, and extremely broad, and long-armed, and long-legged. The lawn chair was regular size, but it looked tiny under him. It was bent and crushed out of shape. His knuckles were nearly touching the ground. His neck was thick and his hands were the size of dinner plates...A wild man. But not really. Underneath everything else seemed strangely civilized....His gaze was both wise and appealing, both friendly and bleak, both frank and utterly cynical." [42]
      Reacher is described as being 6 feet 5 inches (1.96 m) tall, weighing 210-250 pounds (95-113 kg) and having a 50-inch (130 cm) chest;.[10][12] In Never Go Back, he was physically described as having "a six-pack like a cobbled city street, a chest like a suit of NFL armor, biceps like basketballs, and subcutaneous fat like a Kleenex tissue."[32] In his youth, his physical appearance was described as that of a 'bulked-up greyhound'.[43] He also reveals that his size is purely genetic; he states in Persuader[44] and Never Go Back[32] that he is not much of an exercise enthusiast. Does any of that sound like Tom Cruise?

    • @hippoguy17
      @hippoguy17 Před 7 lety +5

      I read the books and his lack of size annoys me. If you changed him to a large black man it would be closer to the book than Tom Cruise. He states in one book that when a dozen special marines are fighting in a bar they send one MP to take care of it. Tom Cruise might do it but he does not have the aura to carry the role.

    • @lukewithann7256
      @lukewithann7256 Před 7 lety +9

      ChrisF this is exactly why tom cruise is the completely wrong cast... :( (besides the fact that i can't stand tom cruise)
      i could really imagine a jack reacher tv-series with the guy who plays the punisher in the second daredevil series to play jack reacher :P or some new talent that at least looks the part

    • @SarahSmith-xv5kd
      @SarahSmith-xv5kd Před 7 lety +1

      Luke with an N fuck you hater

  • @Ace_x77
    @Ace_x77 Před 7 lety +2

    I really enjoyed Basically Jack Reacher is Ethan Hunt plus Jason Bourne. It was amazing.

  • @bebopblues2616
    @bebopblues2616 Před 6 lety +39

    I've read every Reacher book. Clearly the director of this film didn't read any of them. First of all the Reacher created by the author of the character is 6'5" and 250lbs...what idiots let that fact slip thru when it came to casting of Cruise? Just because they didn't bother to read the one (out of twenty books) book that is so rudely massacred by this movie didn't they guess that
    A LOT of others had?

    • @dhardy6654
      @dhardy6654 Před 4 lety +1

      So true.

    • @scuderiatororosso1422
      @scuderiatororosso1422 Před 4 lety +5

      I always pictured Reacher as an enlarged late 30’s Harrison Ford.

    • @amcd85
      @amcd85 Před 4 lety

      It’s cruise because he demanded it be him with his money and his ego.

    • @_XR40_
      @_XR40_ Před 3 lety +4

      @@amcd85 More like it's Cruise because he was the Producer and put up the money for the film

    • @markpeterson1819
      @markpeterson1819 Před 3 lety +1

      @@scuderiatororosso1422 I was thinking more a Rocky era Dolph Lundgren

  • @derekofbaltimore
    @derekofbaltimore Před 7 lety +6

    it got a sin for Jump Around? That sound was awesome.. pack it up pack it in, let me begin, i came to win battle me thats a sin!

  • @NeritonDjonne
    @NeritonDjonne Před 7 lety +11

    You guys, miss the tittle. Correct is "Everything is Wrong With Jack Reacher in 130 minutes"

    • @DaveMorgan
      @DaveMorgan Před 7 lety +28

      Neriton Djonne I like tittles. Especially big, natural tittles.

    • @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING
      @iSteelRazorBladeGAMING Před 7 lety +2

      Neriton Djonne *I grab 'em by the tittles.*

    • @sootydooty4346
      @sootydooty4346 Před 7 lety +1

      Guy wtf I like boobs as much as the next guy, but chill

  • @blasthim4271
    @blasthim4271 Před 5 lety +8

    8:15 Emerson doesn’t really think he killed her...he’s been in on it the whole movie, that sin didn’t really make sense

  • @hittheheadlines2942
    @hittheheadlines2942 Před 8 měsíci

    The gold medal sin goes to Jack Reacher: rather than giving Sandy a vague warning to leave town, why not make sure she is safe. You obviously knew she was in danger

  • @amypicton1458
    @amypicton1458 Před 7 lety +48

    Could you do the 2016 Ghostbusters?

    • @gamertwo-four661
      @gamertwo-four661 Před 7 lety +6

      Amy Picton OMG yes, but hopefully not a majorly biased version, I kind of want if from at least neutral point of view rather than constantly negative (yes I do like the film, ESPECIALLY because of the cast)

    • @littlepico9862
      @littlepico9862 Před 7 lety +15

      Gamer two-four U do realise what channel ur watching rght?

    • @massconnect9329
      @massconnect9329 Před 7 lety

      They might be afraid to.

    • @Bendrix27
      @Bendrix27 Před 7 lety +11

      That sin video would be a few hours long at least. It would probably break the record for most sins ever.

    • @Wrathinside
      @Wrathinside Před 7 lety

      They partnered with Screen Junkies for TASM 2, so since SJ did their Honest Trailer, I'm pretty sure CinemaSins will soon make the episode.
      And no, I hope that while SJ tried to suck some balls even worse than Nostalgia Critic, from CS I expect a proper episode.

  • @renpotter1606
    @renpotter1606 Před 7 lety +198

    "someone who could kill that girl with one punch" saitama wtf

    • @keukenkastje05
      @keukenkastje05 Před 7 lety +17

      ONE PUUUUUUUNCH!
      But yes, same thought.

    • @billclubbe1241
      @billclubbe1241 Před 7 lety +12

      great anime

    • @jyatsko89
      @jyatsko89 Před 7 lety +2

      bill clubbe Eh, no, not great. Enjoyable, and pretty funny at times? Yeah, definitely. Great, or up there in the top tier of animes? No lel, no, far, far from that kind of label/tier.

    • @iwanbro6973
      @iwanbro6973 Před 6 lety

      Renée Potter

    • @iwanbro6973
      @iwanbro6973 Před 6 lety

      aku cinta kamu dtg nga sekrg

  • @OneLordeAnimeClips
    @OneLordeAnimeClips Před 5 lety +33

    40% of comments: People complaining about Tom Cruise's height.
    40% of comments: People defending Tom Cruise
    20% of comments: One Punch Man jokes.

    • @3mmmmmm
      @3mmmmmm Před 5 lety +3

      And jokes about Jack Reacher, Jason Bourne and John Wick

  • @CraftBeer4Life
    @CraftBeer4Life Před 3 lety +2

    I can't believe he didn't sin the dialogue: "What's it like being a military cop? The same thing as a regular cop except everyone you deal with is a trained killer." You know who sins that part? Every Military Policeman ever.

  • @chrisarrona5791
    @chrisarrona5791 Před 7 lety +11

    Can u do evrything wrong with HOLES

  • @karlsson8439
    @karlsson8439 Před 7 lety +11

    you forgot to sin the fact that tom cruise is NOT riding a motorcycle in this movie.

  • @RamMan2016
    @RamMan2016 Před 7 lety

    I love that hat and bus scene as well.

  • @jamesvarner7198
    @jamesvarner7198 Před 4 lety

    You know I love the movie still but man you are SO FUNNY I'M TRYING NOT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD good job

  • @TheTruthSyrum
    @TheTruthSyrum Před 7 lety +56

    "He DOES take it black, but no one outside the "Church" is supposed to know that."
    Kudos CinemaSins. That made me spit my coffee out in a fit of laughter! The kind that makes you go "HO HO HO HO *SNORT" I know I'm subbed already, so I'm going to advertise your work all over FB every video you put out!

  • @sierra2846
    @sierra2846 Před 7 lety +5

    **salutes**
    "O Captain, My Captain!"
    If you get that reference then join me.

  • @axehammer3850
    @axehammer3850 Před 6 lety

    Oh my God!! I spit out my drink when he yelled Nosferatu! LOL

  • @coolguy02536
    @coolguy02536 Před 6 lety +1

    Off course you forget the part where Herzog’s character tells the goon “Did I have a knife in Siberia?” (Or wherever it was) after telling him to chew his thumb off.
    No, but you did have severe frostbite, which certainly made your entire hand numb.

  • @scottbuckley823
    @scottbuckley823 Před 7 lety +4

    I haven't seen the movie since it came out but loved that they did practical action and stayed away from CGI

  • @markspath1303
    @markspath1303 Před 7 lety +47

    Don't forget the most important thing: Jack Reacher is supposed to be 6' 5''...Tom Cruise is far from that^^...Plus they changed the story from the book in some unnecessary parts

    • @Dragonblaster1
      @Dragonblaster1 Před 3 lety +3

      Tom Cruise isn't that far off 6' 5": he's actually 6" 5'.

    • @petersarubbi
      @petersarubbi Před 3 lety +7

      That was the biggest sin... Casting Tom Cruise... Nothing against his acting ability... But... Lee Child describes Jack Reacher in every book... When reading them I never pictured Tom Cruise... Never understood why he was cast in these movies

    • @zantas-handle
      @zantas-handle Před 3 lety +2

      @@petersarubbi Because he may be a short arse but his ego is massive!

    • @_XR40_
      @_XR40_ Před 3 lety +3

      @@petersarubbi "...Never understood why he was cast..." Because he was the Producer, and the movie wouldn't have been made if he didn't pay for it.

    • @petersarubbi
      @petersarubbi Před 3 lety +1

      @@_XR40_ well yeah... But... James Cameron produced The Terminator... And he still let Arnold Schwarzenegger be The Terminator... The producer doesn't always make the best star😁

  • @LinNof
    @LinNof Před 7 lety

    Would love to see a sins video on the prestige, totally forgot about it until you mentioned it

  • @Jackhintze06
    @Jackhintze06 Před 7 lety +4

    "How bout the inside of an ambulance?"
    Best line ^

  • @moondood0918
    @moondood0918 Před 7 lety +3

    As a track and field runner, I appreciate the Justin Gatlin reference right of the bat. 10/10 XD

  • @evancruciani3746
    @evancruciani3746 Před 7 lety +61

    I bet CinemaSins won't do "Everything Wrong With the Ten Commandments" I dare you and then read the comments section

  • @Tikki-cy1wk
    @Tikki-cy1wk Před 7 lety +1

    A lot of the "sins" being pointed out were in the book. The coin and the cone were left to frame the other guy. The bar and streetfight scene were also in the book. Probably just didn't transfer well.

  • @isaacmorgan644
    @isaacmorgan644 Před 7 lety

    the do u even lift reference was well placed

  • @Ingens_Scherz
    @Ingens_Scherz Před 7 lety +9

    5ft 8 Tom Cruise totally miscast as 6ft 4 Jack Reacher = 1000 sins. Job done.

    • @lemeres2478
      @lemeres2478 Před 7 lety +5

      "He is 20 feet tall, can fell 1000 trees with a single ax swing, and has tamed the mythical blue ox..... Peter Dinklage is... PAUL BUNYAN".

    • @Ingens_Scherz
      @Ingens_Scherz Před 7 lety

      Lemeres LMAO :)

  • @Katiedid1985
    @Katiedid1985 Před 7 lety +21

    You had to touch the one decent action film since the 90s ugh

    • @hepchaos
      @hepchaos Před 7 lety +2

      I suggest you go back and watch some 80's action films and rethink your statement about "decent action film".

    • @equalsfortyfour7256
      @equalsfortyfour7256 Před 7 lety +5

      "Since the 90s" means that any movie after the 90s is shit.

    • @DavidBrown-fp6hz
      @DavidBrown-fp6hz Před 7 lety

      Yes, and his rebuttal is that the ones before the 90's were shit.

    • @dracson237
      @dracson237 Před 7 lety +23

      This must've been the only action film you've seen since the 90s

    • @spearofconquest
      @spearofconquest Před 7 lety +7

      so the you missed 4 bourne movies? are you below the age of 12?

  • @ShadowReaper-pu2hx
    @ShadowReaper-pu2hx Před 2 lety

    Ki Hong Lee said the same thing as the guy at 13:54 while filming Maze Runner: The Death Cure in a blooper for the scene where Minho (his character) gets tased.

  • @PawzBrownMTG
    @PawzBrownMTG Před 21 dnem

    Did you know that it had been 22 years since Robert Duval & Tom Cruise had been in an movie together? Days of Thunder. Wasn't sure if you knew that. KEEP STAYING PAWZITIVE BRO 👍

  • @moonlightwarriorgaming743
    @moonlightwarriorgaming743 Před 7 lety +48

    Anything that involves Tom Cruise deserves to be sinned.

    • @HFATV
      @HFATV Před 7 lety +2

      except for jerry maguire, collateral and the last two MI movies

    • @E3ECO
      @E3ECO Před 7 lety +4

      I liked that one about the repeating time loop.

    • @PaperbackWizard
      @PaperbackWizard Před 7 lety +1

      And "A Few Good Men". And "Top Gun". And the first MI movie.

    • @set9034
      @set9034 Před 7 lety +9

      E3ECO Edge of Tomorrow?

    • @jonwilliams6938
      @jonwilliams6938 Před 7 lety

      Jack Reacher is described in every book by the author as "A 6'5" 250 lbs mesomorpth with hands the size of supermarket chickens, long gorilla arms, and solid slabs of muscle." You know,...Tom Cruise???