Girls With Autism | My Signs and Traits
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- čas přidán 10. 09. 2024
- In this video, I talk about the traits and symptoms. I portrayed as a young girl from when I was a baby up through middle school.
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#autism #autismawareness #autismo #autismmom #autismspeaks #autismacceptance #bautismo #autismfamily #autismmemes #autismlife #autismawarenessmonth #autismlove #autismparents #autisme #autismdad #autismspectrumdisorder #autismsupport #autismspectrum #autismobrasil #autismawarenessday #autismrocks #autismparent #worldautismawarenessday #ilovesomeonewithautism #autismmoms #autismoinfantil #autismwarrior #autismstars #autismkids #bautismos #autismadvocate #autismmum #autismjourney #autismmommy #autismworld #autismcommunity #autismteacher #autismstrong #autismawarness #ig_autism
Also super important to note that dual diagnosis of ADHD and Autism wasn’t done until 2013… it was thought that you could only be one or the other, not both. I was diagnosed as ADHD as a kid though my parents were told that I had symptoms of autism but that diagnosis would not be as helpful for me at school as the adhd diagnosis since I was considered “high functioning”. We know so much more now than even 10 years ago.
Wow! I did not no that. Thank you for this information! It’s crazy how behind we are on understanding all of this. 2013 was so recent.
"We know so (...) 10 years ago."
For instance what?
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In 2019 a paper was published identifying genes associated with ADHD and Autism
Before this, the genetic link was merely suspected but not confirmed
I've typed and deleted this comment like 10 times now... but I just want to say THANK YOU!! For a while now I've been grappling with the fact that I think I may be autistic and have been doing tons of research and consuming lots of content about autism and how it presents differently in women than in men. It's wonderful to have more women (especially a woman that I know!!) talking about autism and their life experience and struggles. Your videos feel so calming while also being informative ❤
I’m so so happy you could find value in my Contant. And yes, that is a very artistic thing to do lol consuming all there is to know about it! 🥰 thank you! That’s what I want this place to be. Calming and comforting and informative.
I didn't get diagnosed until 47. 47 years without knowing. That is super traumatic!
So many years having no idea, being misunderstood, feeling confused why I couldn't be a "normal " ADULT, being called immature, unreasonable, shamed for being "difficult", shamed for not being able to function at a level that I "was supposed to be able to", years and years and years of psychological damage, depression, "unreasonable" anxiety (why don't you just lighten up?), adult "tantrums" (What is WRONG with you???!!!), shutdowns (Oh. You're just not going to talk to me? You are immature), "Why do you act that way? You are so weird? GROW UP!", "You are too quiet. Are you even HAVING a good time.?", etc.
Not to mention the psychiatrists misdiagnosing me, Invalidating me, and not listening to me when I would say "My anxiety is still really bad even though I am on this antidepressant." Being told, "Well, it isn't going to make you feel 'no' anxiety." Funny, that's not what I said, but I invalidated myself, and told myself that my expectations were too high. Um, no.
I’m so sorry your experienced this. 😔
I can relate to all
Of that! For 38 years I went without knowing I was autistic - so many years of confusion and masking only to end up frustrated and depressed. I look back and realize all my relationships were created through my masking - oh and the anxiety is actually worse in ways since finding out that I had autism . It creates a self awareness that just makes things even stranger
I can totally relate! I was diagnosed ADHD and BPD at 35yrs old. That was 13yrs ago. I realized about 7yrs ago I did not even have BPD. That diagnosis never fit. I am just now diving into tons of research about Autism, that started as research about my ADHD to better understand myself. I have since discovered....OMG...I think I have ASD also!! I brought it up to my psychiatrist who quickly doubted and told me , OH that is just your ADHD. I was like no this is different. I had already taken several online assessments online. She printed one of for me to take. I told her I had already taken it and emailed the results. She said she would look at it. I have not heard anything after a week so I emailed her my other assessments. So now just waiting for the next step. I have pretty much gone into meltdown/shutdown mode after figuring this out bc it is almost like the world was lifted off me bc I can FINALLY start understanding myself and understanding my entire life!
I wish I had realized in my 20’s. I didn’t get diagnosed until 35 with 3 kids when I had a major meltdown. :-(
Wow, I have ADHD and autism and you described how I was as a kid so closely! I didn’t display classical “autistic” stimming behaviors as much as what people recognize as ADHD hyperactivity traits (but it was all stimming, I think). I was always in motion…like you were saying, I loved climbing trees, the door frames (!!!), counters, spinning, spinning in chairs. I was very soothed by rocking in my baby swing (I don’t think they make them anymore but it was a thing in the 80s/90s…a self-swinging swing you could set your baby in. I used it until my feet dragged the ground and I couldn’t anymore!!! I was always fidgeting…bouncing my legs or moving in some kind of way. I think I also stimmed through singing…songs I knew (I also learned loads of songs at a young age) but also just making up my own little sing-songy things I’d repeat. I also loved the little mermaid songs, omg. And I was the same way with my stuffed animals and toys…I had a littlest pet shop collection, a Polly Pocket Collection. I’d keep all of my toys in perfect shape and never lost anything. I’d line up my stuffed animals and arrange them in a certain way. I had a beanie baby collection and same with them! I didn’t really play act imaginary stuff with them either, but I thought of them more like people or friends? Stories like The Brave Little Toaster and The Velvetine Rabbit really spoke to me and I felt so much empathy and sadness for my stuffed animals that I may not have cared for enough and made sure I gave love and attention in some way to the ones that might feel left out, especially the ones that weren’t the prettiest. I couldn’t stand to think they could feel left behind, lonely and unloved (I’m just realizing that I felt left behind, lonely and unloved and that’s probably why I had such empathy for them…). I was also early verbal and early walking, my mom says I taught myself how to read and how to play piano and read music (she taught my older siblings to read and had been a school teacher and taught other kids to read so I guess she knew she hadn’t taught me).
I also had a male family member that bullied me a lot and he was extremely annoyed by my moving/hyperactive/noisy traits. He’d constantly say “why are you such a freak!!!” “Why are you so ADHD!!!” Etc. 😞 My home was definitely not a safe space.
Anyway thank you for sharing…wish we were friends as kids 😉 ❤️
Mee
You’re talking about meeee 😲!!!! My collection of bouncy balls, I still have it, I have over 100…. And I spent as much time as I could hanging upside down .. I haven’t met anyone with this sort of quirks! And of course lots of other things, sounds so much like me! Wow it makes sense….
Very fascinating! I struggle to remember much of my childhood but wish I could because I want to know how many traits I really showed. I received an autism diagnosis at 34, but was diagnosed with severe ADHD as a kid. As you went through these I was going “check…check…mom said yes so check…” lol. I really resonated with you saying you were a sensory seeker, this something I experience as well but most autistic people I’ve watched only reference being sensory avoidant. I do remember my mom telling stories that she used to have to literally hold me down to get me to sleep because I wouldn’t stop moving. I also loved to spin (still do) and if I think about playing with toys I can’t recall if I really played with them or just set them up and then re-enacted things I’ve seen as “playing”.
First point; 'Women/girls presently differently than boys'. A very contagious phrase now, that is both true and untrue. And it's the untrue part that concerns me here. The blind-spot here is that it's a stereotype: and thus unless you think men/boys are stereotypes, it's effects men that don't show stereotypically as defined by a limited list of medicalised symptoms. There are plenty of late diagnosis men (I am one of them - @50) and the possibility of hidden populations of men that never had a diagnosis, is not something that should be bypassed. My hope is that with the new generations, the situation has changed. BUT progress is often less representative than we'd like it to be, especially promissory culture with it's populist and often political headlines (ie., not the thoroughbred racehorse we'd like it to be, but a large heavy horse, ploughing the same old field).
Defo good+ for any woman/girl getting 'that' diagnosis: I certainly don't want to deflect from that (people play the zero sum game way too often!) - just don't get carried away with popular headline statements - they don't necessarily represent the real picture - just the popular mediated one.
Second point: don't buy into the 'male and white VS Female and black trend; it's lazy, although it will win you friends. It is often used as validation; and todays virtue signifiers and signalling is problematic, as it doesn't deal with the real. Be cautious with what you validate yourself with.
I was reading at a very young age. My favorite books were Disney books. I would read them CONSTANTLY and I'd subject my mother to a barrage of Disney stories, everywhere - in the car, in the bathroom, at the grocery store, etc. 🤣
Oh boy... Might need to see a therapist 😂
It's called Hyperlexia. I had it, too. Teachers paraded me around in K-3rd...
I'm recognising all of this what I was like as a child tickling all the boxes reconiseing stuff that I didn't realise before. The bullying really effects what kind of adult you become
I did the exact same thing. Researched the crap outta autism and realizing I actually know absolutely nothing about it. And really nobody really knows anything about it except the doctors. Parents don't normally know the symptoms to look for and if their kids are not delayed then they think nothing is wrong. We could be geniuses lol. Nobody would ever think Austism and I am still not diagnosed but I'm seeing the signs in myself and my kids and my boyfriend even and my kids friends and literally everybody around me seems like they may be undiagnosed. It's insane.
I was really into The Kinks for a while and I felt I needed a role model so I would dress the way The Kinks did on stage in 1964 and dress like Mick Avory in general because he's the member who resonated with me the most. That was 10 to 14 years ago. I don't do that anymore. Now I just wear whatever I want, no matter how strange I look.
I am so impressed you can remember so much. Being a kid was so horrible for me, I don't remember much.
Same here all i remember is pain and hurt and Bad feelings nothing else
I burned the memories into my brain forever... by rembering hyperspecific details...
More study of autism in girls and women needs to be done. I as an autistic 75 year-old woman do not have the brain of a boy.
Get with it, Science.
Very concerned for my Granddaughter who is 5. She was in a kindergarten class and bit the teacher on the hand. She seems to be a very busy young girl. So concerned and live quite far away 😢
I love how detailed you can connect all the pieces and dots. I realize in listening to this I am very disconnected from a lot my childhood details. But I can see a lot of these with the kids. Thank you dearly for opening up and sharing all these incredible details and all the work you have done wow. You’re so alive love. This is beautiful to watch.
Thank you so much for the kind words. 🫶🏼🥹 it took a long time to remember. I blocked out a lot of my pre teen and teen years but I’ve really been digging into memory lately.
Put me immediately into tears when you mentioned being ahead of milestones as I was. That’s one piece of me that I couldn’t find any info on. I’m officially adhd, unofficially asd (therapist had me do all those online tests and another doctor has spent hours with me and believes I am.) Just waiting on official diagnosis and I’m still so scared I’ll get someone who doesn’t understand. My thing was language, drawing, books. Total language fascination. Unicorns! Thing is, my mom doesn’t remember a lot of details and to her it was normal mostly. Exception was my need for alone time all the time.
You give me hope for may daughter to be independent when she grow up.
Autism ddlg abdl age regression my channel
I’m like eight seconds in and I have never seen a video of yours before and I want to tell you that I already love your energy. You have good vibes.
And your nose is cute and your eyes are pretty.
Thank you. Just thank you so much for this. The littlelest pet shop thing is something I relate to so much with Lego Minifigures, so it’s nice to know I’m not the only one. Thank you for this video
You are so welcome! I’m so happy you could resonate. And thank you for being here!
I am glad I have found your channel. In this video you describe everything so clearly and easy to understand. So relatable content 😃🥲. I love seeing parts of me in somebody else´s stories .. I am stimming the whole video.
The toilet thing I remember I went through a phase for years where I'd have to run away from the toilet before it finished flushing so it didn't "get me". I have no idea why but there we are 😅
Wow you stopped me cold with this video. I also had a bully at home. 😮
Sit n’ spin!!!! (Just remembered the name lol)
I used to spin, do cartwheels
Good topic
Great video! Thank you for sharing your journey.
Thank you! It’s been a very therapeutic process. ♥️
would love to see home videos of you as a little kid
Nice one 👍🏼 very relatable
I’m glad you enjoyed it!
Oh geez I just remembered how much I would spin in this little toy as a kid…I don’t know what you call them but they were round and low to the ground, you’d sit on the toy and there was a column on the center with a wheel circle handle thing in the middle and you’d pull on that in a twisting motion and then it would spin your body if you kept twisting it. You could spin around so fast on that toy…I remember spinning so fast I’d be falling off and onto the carpet.
It was called a Sit’n Spin
They weren't based on "white adolescent males"... they were based on "white adolescent males that fit some set of stereotypical presentations". I think the notion that females present differently is also a false premise. People that mask highly present differently, whether they're male or female, though more females certainly seem to fit that criteria than males... by a lot.
If you look at all people that are diagnosed later in life, they're going to be in a similar boat. I wasn't diagnosed until my 40s. And I remember more things that I did as a child every day that seem like a big, "DUH!". I still have "imposter syndrome" with respect to my formal diagnosis, and then I get another slap in the face waking me up. I had some memories come back up this morning about a time when I was with some stranger (to me, but this person knew my mother), for some reason, and he had a car phone! So, I was compelled to count to 100 on the car phone... inputting all of the numbers. Fortunately, he was really patient and let me get all the way to 100 before saying it was probably a good idea to stop... which worked for me because it was a nice stopping place for my rigidity towards "completeness". I still don't know why my mother wanted him to give me a ride to the place we were all going to... nothing happened at all. Maybe she just thought it would be fun because he drove a convertible... or maybe I even mentioned something about never riding in one before... because I know to that point that I am not aware of riding in one before that.
I think there were a few things that kept me under the radar. My grandparents mostly raised me until I was school-aged and they were very patient and proud of me (turns out, my grandfather was also likely autistic... and a couple of my cousins are... and my grandfather had a lot more affection for us than the other grandkids... 3 of us versus 17 in total... what a coincidence). Despite meltdowns and many ailments that are now considered highly comorbidties with autism (sleeping, digestive, etc.), it never was a problem for them because I was just me in their eyes. But, I had some tragedy happen shortly after entering Kindergarten and my behaviors were likely chalked up to the trauma... and then I think the masking started after my stepfather came into the picture because I wouldn't have survived in my own home without those skills, let alone the normal and routine issues experienced by autistics from peers at school.
EDIT: I also worry that this lack of representation has been detrimental to everyone, considering that it is probably entirely genetic (I don't why people say, "mostly" genetic... whether it is inherited, epigenetic, a mutation, or a combinatorial set of inheritance from two parents of which neither are autistic... it is still "genetic"). My mother and aunt have some serious issues. I don't know that they're autistic, but I wouldn't be surprised if they are. My mother is a massive attention seeking narcissistic jerk. I don't think it is a misdiagnosis and that she could be autistic instead, but that if she is autistic, she is also a narcissist. If she is autistic... the narcissism is probably from the feedback she received and not having support and accommodation. And that absolutely ruined my relationship with her.... and not having a father around (the tragedy I experienced early was that he died in an accident), I could have really used a good relationship with my other parent. And when we see the cringe "autism moms" out there... how many of them are just other versions of my mother? Somebody that could likely be autistic and has had a lot of negative feedback that has horribly shaped them. And the cascading repercussions that their children and grandchildren have experienced is due to this horrible job of identifying autistic people of all types. It is a horrible shame.
3 out of 4 kids with autism are boys, this number still holds up today. The more the understanding of autism expands more people are diagnosed but it’s still mostly boys. The kids that were diagnosed when I was going through grade school were profoundly autistic people with a disability you couldn’t simply ignore.
Most people that seek mental health services are women. This will lead to a disproportionate amount of women getting diagnosed. We also aren’t considering there are male dominated industries that if you do get diagnosed you’d lose your career.
One thing about masking, boys are more like to receive corporal punishment and it’s typically more severe… how many young boys had the autism beaten out of them. Try learning to unmask that shit.
you seem to be nice. good video!
I wish I knew more about my childhood and infancy, my parents tell me nothing, I belive they dont remember much and wasent paying attention. They didint even realised I have sensitivity to lights.
Same. Sending you lovingkindness.
interesting video
Oh! The boing-ey door stops- I could not leave those things alone!!!
You've described me as a little girl. Like EVERYTHING 😮 and I don't know how to feel about it. I'm 47, just self diagnosed. The things I thought made me me are autistic traits. The rest is masking. Who am I then, what is left, do I even exist? Is it really a simulation, and we've given preset avatars? 🤯
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Actually ADD and ADHD is not an education eligibility in California! Autism is! They may change it! If you have ADD you may qualify for specific learning disability-I have seen so much ADD in my autistic students-Now most teachers-aides understand it-over 30 years as a school psychologist in Los Angeles-key is the spectrum and so many parents tell me their characteristics change as early as 2!
And whether your autism impacts your education-Clinical diagnosis is different!
I recently saw a new psychologist because I’m convinced that I’m on the spectrum and probably a level 1 and I wanted a diagnosis. I answered a bunch of questions and afterwards he told me that he wasn’t really seeing Autism in me because I didn’t have any repetitive interests where I did things over and over is how he said it. I had told him that my hobbies were coloring and painting and watching videos. He said the second reason he didn’t see Autism in me was because I understood people’s emotions and body language. I know that through my life Ive had to learn a lot of ways to be normal and im high masking so I disagree with him. I can watch videos for 2,3, and 10 years on one subject daily up to 5 + hours. In your opinion does that sound like a repetitive special interest ? I have several other traits that I won’t list but I’m wondering if my video watching is an Autistic trait. I watched videos about coloring for 3 years and minimalism for 2 years and Autism videos daily for 10 years.
Sigh... I'm so tired of doctors dismissing people who seek a diagnosis for their autism if they understand emotions, sarcasm or body language. Asd is on a spectrum and imho from my own experience, not everyone experiences all of the difficulties, some might have trouble with sensory input, others with speech, others with social cues, others with crowds or noises or whatever, some might have all of the difficulties. It's because the autistic people on the very extreme end of the spectrum are taken as reference and if you're not presenting like them, often doctors are too uneductaed on the subject to recognise the neurodivergence. Also, adhd often comes with autism and in this case specifically, it mught not be discovered because they can both kinda hide each other - the adhd makes you talkative and impulsive, sensation seeking, the asd makes you appreciate order and structure, quiet etc. To the outside world you appear almost normal but inside you're not feeling normal at all. It's such a mess. I think btw i have both. My mum is very clearly autistic to me, maybe even leaning borderline but I'm not like her. I love new sensations fpr example, i'm also really good at learning languages (i see the patterns there - which is an autistic thing or a combination of adhd and asd thinking) at but i'm also extremely noise sensitive, like no one in my family. Car noises for example make me experience grey brain fog and they feel like being stabbed in the head. I never got any diagnosis or even a hint that I might be neurodivergent cause compared to my mum or my sister I was the most normal. There's so much to discover still
Yeah, that doctor doesn’t understand how to interpret the DSM autism criteria at all regarding the things you mentioned. There’s a broad spectrum of traits and presentations that can fit into each of the criteria. Plus, in that second main section of the DSM-5 criteria, it says you only have to have two out of four of the features (which literally means you can meet criteria and not have special interests….or not have sensory issues…or not have stimming behaviors…)
I think he’s interpreting with way too narrow and rigid thinking. There can me so much more
Nuance involved and, also, there’s that part in the third second where
It talks about how you needed to show traits in childhood but you may have learned to mask certain traits so you don’t really do them anymore.
There’s also the stuff about special interests…it could be something EXTREMELY narrow and unusual and hard to relate to. An autistic person might only have one. But they could also have several special interests and some could be way more relatable…like psychology, or a popular TV show, or a sport, or makeup. It’s mainly about the intensity in which someone pursues the interest and how long they pursue the interest (it won’t be fleeting, and it will be more intense than neurotypicals)
The emotional social issues also have so much nuance, and it’s so incorrect to say autistic people can’t understand emotions or empathize etc. It really just depends on the autistic person…I know I, for example, am often very aware of other people’s emotions, but I often don’t understand WHY they have them when neurotypicals would understand why (and also our approach and response to them could be very different than a neurotypical person. For example, we might know someone is upset with us. In response, our brain might shut down and we could be unable to think or talk. Or maybe we come up with a reason why they are upset with us and so we come up with what we think is the reason and then we create a “rule” to keep ourselves from ever doing the thing we think we did to upset that person. Or maybe they are just upset, and we don’t really know how to respond so we feel extremely awkward and we try our best to offer comfort but we come across as disconnected and not warm from them. There are just so many ways an autistic person could respond….and they would still be really atypical social responses even though the autistic person is very in tune with identifying another person’s emotions
Thank you!
So many of these things remind me of things that my son has done or dealt with…
Oh I hear you mama. 😔♥️ it’s so hard when we know our children’s hearts and we have to see them be hurt by others.
i keep foam ear plugs in my pants pocket. i put them in whenever i flush a public toilet
I wear Loop ear plugs all of the time at work and in public. I like to live life at my own volume
00:35 Isn't that just typical? The crap that group have to deal with is not just unreasonable but unreal!
That salt lamp is not good to have around your cat, it’s poisonous. Especially, don’t allow kitty to lick it.
??
I'm not a fan of my Aunt Cindy's blender😢.
Fake
Did you know that ADHD comes from being raised buy a refrigerator mother which means the person that raised you didn't have emotional empathy so more than likely the leading causes to be raised by a mom that has the dark Triad machiavellianism which means sociopath or narcissistic sociopath also Psychopathic mothers and sometimes bipolar will cause ADHD in children
Also a lot of times if it wasn't bad enough that the moments like this it gets worse a lot of the times the dad will also be a psychopath I don't always have to be blood related this could be a stepdad in the house
Not true You are born with it
There is a ton of overlap of autism characteristics and childhood trauma characteristics. But they are still different. Same with autism and adhd. Look up vinn diagrams of the above comparisons.