Podcast Episode #54: How to deal with anger and toxic people

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  • čas přidán 11. 11. 2018
  • We all get angry, and often we are justified in our anger. But when does this anger become toxic? When does it start affecting our mental and physical health? And how do we deal with toxic people?
    In this episode I discuss how to know when you have stepped over into toxic anger, how to deal with anger, and how to deal with toxic people.
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    Website: drleaf.com
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    Twitter: @drcarolineleaf

Komentáře • 38

  • @gemmawilliams1127
    @gemmawilliams1127 Před 5 lety +8

    The Holy Spirit directed me to this podcast Dr Leaf.
    I glorify God for you💖

  • @Sistergirl787
    @Sistergirl787 Před 5 lety +3

    Dr. Leaf, thank you for another reminder that we have POWER over our thoughts even when we feel justified in our anger. I loved how you reminded us about the "freaking out in the LOVE zone"... when we're confronted by people or circumstances that can potentially cause us to become bitter. I praise God for you!

  • @VincentNBridgetMoses
    @VincentNBridgetMoses Před 5 lety +18

    So true!!! There are SO MANY powerful components to this podcast! There's a verse in the Bible that says to stay away from (don't hang around) an angry man, lest you become angry yourself! It's SO TRUE!!! I come from a VERY angry household, my dad screams, his, face turns red/purple 😡, the vein bulges in his forehead, his eyes buck out, & spit flies out from his mouth as he's screaming less than 2 inches from your face, most of the time leading to physical abuse. Then my mom is the exact opposite side of the spectrum & gives the silent treatment & is SO GOOD at it that you could be crying hysterically begging her to talk to you & she won't say a peep (physical abuse with her as well). Obviously I didn't have good examples of how to properly process emotions (ESPECIALLY anger), & I've noticed that I've had experiences with mismanaged/processed anger/emotions in my marriage of 2 1/2 years as well (BTW my husband is black & I COMPLETELY relate to and understand the situation with the racism). However, thanks to the Word of God (& you Dr. Leaf) I'm learning how to process my emotions in a healthy way now. I was just wondering what was considered healthy anger, & I'm so glad that you touched on it in this podcast! I'm still learning how to process my emotions properly on a consistent basis, but I'm no longer screaming/yelling or trying to talk over my husband to be able to be heard before he walks away into another room & closes the door. God helped me to understand that what I feel isn't the issue or wrong, but it's the way that I was trying to communicate how I feel that was the issue. I'm DETERMINED to communicate the way that I feel in a loving way while being sure to intently listen to what the other person has to say (even if it's critical or being said in a way that is hurtful) before responding & not trying to talk over them. I just want to reach a solution, not be right, or to "win" the argument. Do you have any suggestions on what to do when someone is being rude, disrespectful, hurtful, or yelling at you? I sure would appreciate some suggestions, we're still learning how to communicate with one another in a consistently loving manner, & I want to do things correctly ESPECIALLY when the other person isn't. I'm a VERY empathetic person, so much so that whenever I'm around people that are going through something difficult or they're angry, I feel what they're going through almost to the degree as if I was going through it myself. I honestly believe it's a gift from God, but unfortunately I allow other people's emotions far too often to rub off on me & set my emotional thermostat to theirs instead of bringing them up to my level (if that makes sense?). I would REALLY appreciate any help you could give me on how to manage these things! Thank you SO MUCH for your time!!! 💜💜💜

  • @TonyaA7
    @TonyaA7 Před 5 lety +2

    I was most definitely lead to your channel by God. God is answering my prayers and doing a deep inner healing and work in my life.. God Bless You Dr. Leaf for sharing all the information you share, your sharing is the love of God extended to all mankind.

  • @kevindaniellewhite2546
    @kevindaniellewhite2546 Před 4 lety +1

    Thank you, Caroline for your expressive communicative, love, that gives impetus to our lives. You are beloved!!

  • @lindawood1189
    @lindawood1189 Před 5 lety

    God bless you, Dr. Leaf. I can't tell you how much your CZcams videos and your books are helping me. I just discovered your teachings a few weeks ago and it is making such an enormous difference in my spiritual life and physical life. Thank you so much!

  • @ct9914
    @ct9914 Před rokem

    This was so powerful and I needed right now. Thank you sooooooo much

  • @joshuaattombentil6551
    @joshuaattombentil6551 Před 5 lety +5

    You're a super great blessing Dr Leaf💚

  • @hristinapiltz1294
    @hristinapiltz1294 Před 5 lety

    Thank you, thank you. This was so powerful and useful. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing such a powerful example.

  • @genovevamurorunkweri981
    @genovevamurorunkweri981 Před 5 lety +2

    And congratulations to your daughter and your family, may Christ lead them always

  • @bettyafonu
    @bettyafonu Před 5 lety

    God bless you Dr Caroline, your channel has been such an incredible timely blessing to my life... I bless God so much for you

  • @mimimbeya
    @mimimbeya Před 5 lety +1

    Thank you Dr. Leaf

  • @edgarsalazar3787
    @edgarsalazar3787 Před 5 lety

    Thank you dr Caroline leaf 🍃 keep it up! 🙏🏽💙

  • @user-sh2nr2gd7y
    @user-sh2nr2gd7y Před 5 lety

    Good talk moment. Thanks🙌🏾

  • @faniseebias7394
    @faniseebias7394 Před 3 lety

    This really helped me mentally with the negative situation I am going through now, thank you. 🤞🏽

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 Před 4 lety

    The reversal has nothing to do with my ex. It has to do with my life with my lovely daughter. I need my life back to me. To run , swim , ride , n shine as I used to. Living a co-untless life ; I love my daughter over these channels .

  • @matthewking8944
    @matthewking8944 Před 3 lety

    this message is great good job dr leaf

  • @Caprivlogs
    @Caprivlogs Před 5 lety

    Your the best, Dr.leaf. 🤗

  • @jamesbates5552
    @jamesbates5552 Před 5 lety +1

    Thank God I needed this so bad time to let go 🙏

  • @pamelavelez656
    @pamelavelez656 Před 5 lety

    Amen. This is so good Dr. Leaf

  • @amyleroux5403
    @amyleroux5403 Před 5 lety

    I’m having such a hard time at work and I really needed to hear this! ♥️

  • @thewillsfamilyaccount6486

    Thank you..

  • @matthewking7874
    @matthewking7874 Před 5 lety

    I like this message

  • @Liselise5438
    @Liselise5438 Před 5 lety

    Gd teaching!

  • @marinussnyman273
    @marinussnyman273 Před 3 lety

    Great info, I'm South African. And dealing with anger and emotions is not big in our culture (unfortunately).
    I heard that dealing with the pain, scream, voice, etc is necessary and then goes over into good action. That sounds good. My question is it a good idea to protect myself by avoiding my dad? Over the years I was the one restoring the relationships over and over while he never takes any responsibility for his actions. He will win me over by guilt trip and manipulation "A son should honor his parents" "You will keep doing what I want" and the famous "silent treatment" I'm done with these games, and it created a lot of pain in me. For long I thought that when I restore the relationship, then I'm doing the good thing and I'll be OK. Not true. I only created a comfortable environment where he doesn't have to change or take responsibility because I will come back again.
    How do I turn the bad energy into good? Can I chose anything or does it have to be " Restore the relationship to the level it was?"

  • @RealEstateRadioTV-SA
    @RealEstateRadioTV-SA Před 4 lety

    11:00 Protective Shield, I like that. Regards South Africa

  • @edgarsalazar3787
    @edgarsalazar3787 Před 5 lety

    Can you do a podcast on how to deal with manipulative people please

  • @genovevamurorunkweri981
    @genovevamurorunkweri981 Před 5 lety +2

    oh dr leaf May God bless you, the racist person should know that in heaven we will all be together l actually think intermarriage is what God wants for us because we are all his children . Thank you because this subject prompted me to forgive individuals that l thought l had forgiven.and so informative and God used your hurt to help us with this, for such a time as this our Father in heaven does not waste anything not even hurt.

    • @Caprivlogs
      @Caprivlogs Před 5 lety

      When it comes to the topic of race ,people feel very strongly. If you are open minded, I would encourage you to watch the red talk on Facebook with a white woman named Jane Elliot. Dr. Leaf just used her experience as an example but if you watch the episode with Jada..pinkett Smith, you will get information on how to use the topic of race and have more of a positive experience. This lady is a Christian and an educator. Again ,if you are interested, go to red table talk on Facebook and view the episode. Thank you and may God bless you .

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 Před 4 lety

    Anger? !!! What ANGER. Leave n let leave. We only leave once... remix. I sent him home to his wife n kids. No problem. His favorite quote. That is called discard , or be discarded. ... I failed. No worries ....

  • @janiceshira8919
    @janiceshira8919 Před 5 lety

    I understand, but I saw the pain in my Son growing up in a White Community, a White Elementary school the cruelty that they did to my son and if Mark him he has now passed away but the damage of not being included , and having a different colored skin changes in the inner person the child and the pain I felt was sad and yes I love my son people are cruel to these children.
    Love Is Love and we have the right to love it doesn't matter the color but it's the children that gets hurt and that's all I I'm saying my little child they leave the house go to school and that's where the damage is done it's not the marriage it's the other people and and their reaction, their belief that damaged the children system we close our eyes and we can't see nothing except love or hate or resentment but you can't see color if your eyes are closed they all are the same until we open our eyes or open heart I .
    In the Bible there was a problem with a Man Marrying a Ethiopian , the sister was upset so much that God put the leprosy on her and she had to leave the camp the Forgiveness came and it was taken off of her that is in the Old Testament.

  • @cherylrightnour9918
    @cherylrightnour9918 Před 4 lety +1

    What if you have no one to talk to so you can get it out, so I end up suppressing it & have done that for years. Even so many times you’ve wanted to cry, but again you hold that in. Done this for years so how do you get healed from years of this?? Even tho you cry out to God for help