the most important step I took to live well - ending the negative cycle

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  • čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
  • ✨🌿My Etsy shop 🥰 thecottagefairyart.etsy.com
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    Thank you!
    When I was trying to recover from severe anxiety I found a lot of wonderful support online, but also - naturally - a lot of negativity as well. I noticed a trend of ‘acceptance’, of people claiming that mental health was something that couldn’t be improved, and that I just had to accept my situation. Now, perhaps this is true for some people, I really don’t know, but I found that believing this hindered my personal journey, stealing my ability to find courage and confidence in myself; to believe I can change and grow. Our belief in our ability to do hard things is so crucial. I simply wanted to encourage all of you to believe in yourself when faced with challenges ❤️
    The root of my anxiety has always been quite negative: negative thinking patterns, despairing thoughts, worrying about the future, assuming the worst will happen, doom-scrolling, believing I am powerless. These are common feelings. As a human population spanning centuries, we seem to often fall into negative patterns and seek out negativity, to find reasons to judge and criticize. And again, I am not saying this is necessarily bad. Maybe being negative doesn’t affect you at all - but in my personal case, I’ve found it to be unhelpful. I need to balance this way of thinking with positive beliefs. How I negatively or positively I react to my external world directly reflects how I feel within. I hope this reflection today encourages you to simply consider whether or not your beliefs about yourself and the world around you are aiding in your growth or not ❤️ and honestly, I can only speak from my experience, so perhaps none of this applies to you, I don’t know, but I’m glad we can connect and share insights. Sending much love and light. lot of wonderful support online, but also - naturally - a lot of negativity as well. I noticed a trend of ‘acceptance’, of people claiming that mental health was something that couldn’t be improved, and that I just had to accept my situation. Now, perhaps this is true for some people, I really don’t know, but I found that believing this hindered my personal journey, stealing my ability to find courage and confidence in myself; to believe I can change and grow. Our belief in our ability to do hard things is so crucial. I simply wanted to encourage all of you to believe in yourself when faced with challenges ❤️
    The root of my anxiety has always been quite negative: negative thinking patterns, despairing thoughts, worrying about the future, assuming the worst will happen, doom-scrolling, believing I am powerless. These are common feelings. As a human population spanning centuries, we seem to often fall into negative patterns and seek out negativity, to find reasons to judge and criticize. And again, I am not saying this is necessarily bad. Maybe being negative doesn’t affect you at all - but in my personal case, I’ve found it to be unhelpful. I need to balance this way of thinking with positive beliefs. How I negatively or positively I react to my external world directly reflects how I feel within. I hope this reflection today encourages you to simply consider whether or not your beliefs about yourself and the world around you are aiding in your growth or not ❤️ and honestly, I can only speak from my experience, so perhaps none of this applies to you, I don’t know, but I’m glad we can connect and share insights. Sending much love and light.
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Komentáře • 766

  • @TheCottageFairy
    @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +428

    Hoping I can offer some encouragement and warmth in this video! It was so interesting to read about the research behind the power of finding beauty and meaning in the midst of challenges, of being kind to yourself and others, and to have a healthy sense of optimistism in regards to life, despite pain and fear. So powerful to see how these people live longer lives and can more easily find a balance and regulate stress. I’m not there yet, I have a far ways to go, but I am inspired, and wanted to send you all some love.
    A therapist that was helpful to me in regards to anxiety was Therapy in a Nutshell on youtube (but there are so many others too that may fit you better!), as well as books on mindfulness and meditation. I took these insights, combined it with my personal spirituality, worked on consistency and believing that I have an identity and innate value beyond labels, and that I can overcome challenges in my own unique way. Healing and thriving looks different for everyone, what it is to me may not be the same for you. But I encourage you to try to see light in dark places, because it seems our minds and bodies respond to it in amazing ways, and work to aid us in that pursuit. ❤️

    • @rimonagale1625
      @rimonagale1625 Před 2 měsíci +13

      People are creatures of habit. Becoming aware of how we think, react...allows us to work on forming new & more positive habits.

    • @jessicaashley3979
      @jessicaashley3979 Před 2 měsíci +13

      I have been watching Therapy in a Nutshell as well. And I'm so glad I have. I have been learning so much from it. Thank you for your videos, Paola. They're also always inspiring and calming to watch.

    • @jane8142
      @jane8142 Před 2 měsíci +12

      Thank you for this video, it really resonates with my own outlook and values 🩷 I would love to read the book you mentioned and wondered if you would mind sharing the title please? Thank you so much, and also for opening to International orders for a while

    • @MagicalMindsByAmra
      @MagicalMindsByAmra Před 2 měsíci +12

      "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one just remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 💖🌟

    • @MagicalMindsByAmra
      @MagicalMindsByAmra Před 2 měsíci +2

      ​@@rimonagale1625Spot on. Awareness is realizing we can always think new thoughts💎

  • @CammyHell
    @CammyHell Před 2 měsíci +475

    These videos are going to be such a beautiful legacy for your child one day.

  • @marykaydavis5002
    @marykaydavis5002 Před 2 měsíci +359

    I love seeing life grow in you in so many ways. You are a blessing to those that share in your life's journey. The calm that you inspire, your music, your thoughts, even your holistic crafting, give me such joy. Thank you.❤

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +30

      Thank you so much ❤

    • @tygerlily1700
      @tygerlily1700 Před 2 měsíci +8

      ❤God Bless you and your Family Always-
      Thank you for your heart warming encouraging words-they resonate with me...Thank you❤❤❤⚘⚘⚘🦋💕

    • @JenFlutterby
      @JenFlutterby Před 2 měsíci +7

      @@TheCottageFairyWould love the title of the book you referred to regarding the chapter/view on Optimism. 😊

  • @TheDreamer1618
    @TheDreamer1618 Před 2 měsíci +67

    I saw a video recently about someone saying, the person you're in a relationship forever is yourself. You are always with yourself. Why are you making that an abusive relationship? And it finally made me understand the whole self love, inner child, etc thing. I don't want to be abusive to anyone, much less myself. It's really helpful to make me catch all the ways I put myself down or criticize myself or else am just so mean. I didn't even realize the habits I got into. So very slowly I'm finally trying and learning what it means to be kinder to myself, without it being an egotistical thing, without fearing that I'm "letting myself off the hook" or being overly self-indulgent of weaknesses/faults. Wishing all of us positive growth and gentle hearts. Thank you Paola. 💞

  • @calypso4554
    @calypso4554 Před 2 měsíci +148

    What I can share:
    One can be friendly with people. As a customer in a store, as a hairdresser, as a mechanic, as a professor, as whatever you find yourself in whatever situation.
    It comes back and warms your heart. ❤

  • @__rishikasingh
    @__rishikasingh Před 2 měsíci +149

    That frame where you and Luke are together watching hot air balloons is the best shot of your entire CZcams video journey!!! ❤❤❤
    It has my entire heart !!!!

  • @debrakintzing8914
    @debrakintzing8914 Před 2 měsíci +58

    I love how your cat is always so intently interested and engaged in everything you do. What a sweetheart!

  • @stacyrosa6672
    @stacyrosa6672 Před 2 měsíci +126

    My Dear, I just turned 62, and I am so inspired by your musings, and crafting! I am struggling at the moment, but you always bring back my appreciation for life❤

    • @bonnieblack3825
      @bonnieblack3825 Před 2 měsíci +8

      Hope you are doing better. You are so precious in the place where you are in life. You are a valuable part. Be blessed.

    • @Jess-wj7cc
      @Jess-wj7cc Před 2 měsíci +7

      Sending Love Stacy💖

    • @mnichols180
      @mnichols180 Před 2 měsíci +8

      One minute at a time... sending love and hugs your way. xoxo

    • @momiborah8707
      @momiborah8707 Před 2 měsíci +2

      Sending love❤

    • @debbiesmith9591
      @debbiesmith9591 Před měsícem

      I just found you on CZcams and it came at the most perfect time. I’m caring for my 91 year mother who is not doing well. Watching you videos give me hope that even though death comes to the ones we love but life will go on. Your calming voice and your love for art, nature gives me hope and encouragement to face tomorrow in the hard days I have faced. Thank you so much for what you give to us in ways you don’t even realize. Thank you.♥️

  • @cynthiatreynor1973
    @cynthiatreynor1973 Před 2 měsíci +85

    You are on the right path! As a former sad and angry person, I can tell you for certain, looking at life with positive thoughts and feelings is a far better way to live. I'm not a very peoply person. But whenever I can, I try to brighten the day of others that I come in contact with. Mutual respect and kindness are so important to your inner happiness. I know that I have felt so wounded by others mistreatment of me in the past that I began to just hate on all of them. No more. I do not allow others to rock my boat and I do my best to help theirs float❤

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +30

      I love that, thank you for sharing! I can relate to your journey, especially when others have hurt you deeply. I also understand not always being a people person, my husband is introverted like myself and always jokes that he shows love to others by recharging away from them often 😂 thank you for your insights

    • @carolinasongbird3362
      @carolinasongbird3362 Před 2 měsíci +10

      @@TheCottageFairy I'm with Luke! I love my beautiful family better when I give myself a chance to miss them a little

    • @tedpreston4155
      @tedpreston4155 Před 2 měsíci +3

      You not alone, in your effort to stop being a sad and angry person, Cynthia! I hope you and I can both stay on the right path, moving away from that sort of thinking!
      If you're not already using it as a tool, I have found "Metta" meditation practice to help keep my mind focused on love and abundance!

    • @southerngirlkr
      @southerngirlkr Před 2 měsíci +3

      I love your videos when I see you posted a new one. I stop and take a deep breath and watch them. It’s a much needed break in my day to remind me of the important things in life. 🩷

  • @lorifalk5517
    @lorifalk5517 Před 2 měsíci +16

    I have a granddaughter that suffers from anxiety. Love your statement: "You are capable, you are strong and your soul desires growth and healing."

  • @sallybourne4886
    @sallybourne4886 Před 2 měsíci +90

    I so agree that positivity has a huge effect on our health and wellbeing. There’s a little poem,
    “Two men looked out from prison bars
    One saw mud and the other saw stars”.
    None of us can be star gazers all the time of course.

    • @MagicalMindsByAmra
      @MagicalMindsByAmra Před 2 měsíci +7

      "Even if you are in the gutter, you have the option of looking at the stars" 🌟

    • @philomenaward1833
      @philomenaward1833 Před 2 měsíci +5

      And why not!? pray, be a star gazer and a light bearer all the time.

    • @marilynschmidt6400
      @marilynschmidt6400 Před 2 měsíci +1

      Just know you are a bright shinning 🌟 blinding all the haters

    • @mosaic2476
      @mosaic2476 Před 2 měsíci

      @@philomenaward1833because you need to look at what pains you in order to transmute it. a huge part of post-traumatic growth is the depth of gratitude some survivors experience because witnessing and accepting the darkness makes the light shine brighter

  • @Umbra_Magna777
    @Umbra_Magna777 Před 2 měsíci +122

    I'm so glad you touched on the topic of people who say, "If you were able to recover, it was never really that bad." I can't even begin to remember how many people I've encountered like that on social media, perfectly content to complain about problems but suddenly becoming bitter when they see someone recovering. It's good that social media has given us a way to talk about things like anxiety (especially since, until recently, it wasn't socially acceptable to talk about mental health), but the problem is that a lot of people sort of stay there in that venting state and don't actually take the steps necessary to recover because they genuinely believe it isn't possible. And then, of course, when they see someone else recover, they become convinced that that person's anxiety and depression weren't real. And not only does that harm their chances of recovery. It's also disrespectful to the people who do recover, because it invalidates how hard they had to work to get where they wanted to go. It's fine to talk about it when you're struggling, but at the end of the day, you've got to get back on the horse and start riding again, or you'll never get anywhere.

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +63

      Thank you for sharing! When I was in recovery for an eating disorder I faced a very similar atmosphere, and a lot of bullying once I decided to try to recover - I now try to always reiterate with everyone that we are each on our own timeline of healing, so we must be gentle towards ourselves and avoid tearing down others who are in a different place in their journey ❤️ thank you again for your insight

    • @cindygaudet1390
      @cindygaudet1390 Před 2 měsíci +2

      Not just anxiety depression but also pain and ill health. I know2 people who if you do better or try to help yourself( healthy diet ,exercises given by physio etc) work on yourself physically and mentally they then think you weren’t that bad.so frustrating as I watcha friend woe is me not get any better but figures i wasn’t that bad even though for 3 yrs have worked hard to r3gain my health and have a long way to go.

    • @dod2304
      @dod2304 Před 2 měsíci +7

      I heard that one time as I was trying to recover from crippling depression and emotional shut down due to a traumatic event. "If you have trouble naming your trauma what say you believe it was, maybe it wan't that at all." That set my recovery and ptsd back years and years.

    • @meloniestewart2940
      @meloniestewart2940 Před 2 měsíci +9

      I’ve been learning to feel my feelings not, to push them down and pretend they never existed as was often done in order to keep the peace or to please others. It has all been bubbling up to the surface bit by bit, day by day to be acknowledged, healed and released. If this is also, true for you, become the witness, the observer, the watcher of these toxic, stuck, old energies but do not, engage with them. Do not give them your soul but simply, observe them like passing clouds. Remain as the witness (the true self, the higher self) let them pass and “let them go.” They are not who you truly are.

    • @onepartwild
      @onepartwild Před 2 měsíci +11

      That's so true. There are some people who seem to like staying in that place. My mom is one. I can't talk to her about my traumas without her one-upping me, saying how much more traumatic her life has been. I'm not allowed to be tired {she's more tired}, sad {she's more sad}, stressed {she's more stressed}, and so on. My mom constantly diminishes what I've gone through since childhood. I've had to recover on my own over many years, and my mom tells me my trauma wasn't so bad if I am so well recovered. No, it was bad. I've just had to be strong, and determined, no matter what, to overcome.

  • @bolilukp683
    @bolilukp683 Před 2 měsíci +70

    Your videos are so calming and peaceful to watch. On this video, it delights me to watch Your Maine Coon Kitty, observing ever so intently at every move you make. It's like the kitty is taking *Mental Notes* for when he/she can do crafting Cat-Style. Thank you for sharing your world and your thoughts. This 71 y/o widow appreciates the way you view your sweet life. Blessings on you and yours. 🥰😘

  • @paultrubey8508
    @paultrubey8508 Před 2 měsíci +40

    I will be sixty one next month. In 2020 I remembered experiencing ongoing sexually abused at age nine through ten by three people in my neighborhood as a kid.
    My life changed as tons of puzzle pieces of my entire life came together with lots of grieving and pain.
    Your videos have been a gift to me which has helped me to be present in the moment and to rediscover my true self. Being present with simple intention and noticing and feeling grateful for the miracles of nature around me and on my farm has been a big piece of my healing. I want to say thank you. You are a beautiful light in the world.

    • @nancyelliott3653
      @nancyelliott3653 Před 2 měsíci +3

      Hello Paul, let me say that Iam so very sorry about the trauma you went through and how proud I am of you to be able to overcome it and not to let it define who you are as a Devine being. Much love❤

    • @paultrubey8508
      @paultrubey8508 Před 2 měsíci +10

      Thank you. Still moving through it but def on the healing side. 🙏

    • @nancyelliott3653
      @nancyelliott3653 Před 2 měsíci

      Sending healing energy to you, my dear, God bless you❤

  • @yuleham
    @yuleham Před 2 měsíci +35

    Your child will be a very lucky one, the world needs more mothers like you

  • @bryonmacpherson1470
    @bryonmacpherson1470 Před 2 měsíci +64

    Wonderful Video Poala. I am older, okay, much older than you(great grandparent) and life has been pretty good. There have been many challenges, but the older I get, the more in awe and appreciation I am. Your sense of cultivating a grounded optimistimism is consistent with my experience. Wishing you well! 😀

  • @morrigans_cottage
    @morrigans_cottage Před 2 měsíci +25

    Your story has been a big inspiration to my own decision to buy a little cottage in rural Ireland to live a slower more peaceful life! Thank you for sharing ❤

  • @autumneve2463
    @autumneve2463 Před 2 měsíci +21

    I've been watching you since I was about 15, I'm 19 now, and you've given me such a hope for my future and such a positive outlook on the world.

  • @BethanyPlatt322
    @BethanyPlatt322 Před 2 měsíci +21

    Anybody who says that you are stuck with whatever mental health issue you have and can't heal from it, just doesn't want to put in the work to feel better. They would rather stay trapped because it is comfortable and less effort. I used to get massive panic attacks and anxiety attacks, and my depression was very severe. Now, I am not "cured," but I am much better, and there are more days of light than darkness. It was a lot of work to get here, but I am very glad I did.

    • @tedpreston4155
      @tedpreston4155 Před 2 měsíci +2

      Here's hoping that your work (and mine) will keep us on a better mental path for the rest of our lives!

  • @joniuptain5509
    @joniuptain5509 Před 2 měsíci +28

    You bring such profound beauty to such ordinary things and it’s so refreshing in today’s world! Thank you so much for what you do!

  • @brightpage1020
    @brightpage1020 Před 2 měsíci +39

    You’re sharing the experience with little one now! Babies get bathed in emotional hormones based on how Momma is feeling. Looks relaxing, gentle, adventurous and fun!

  • @carolinasongbird3362
    @carolinasongbird3362 Před 2 měsíci +23

    I loved making that lantern! I hung it in my window with a simple knotted jute holder and a handful of faerie lights. I love my glowing orb!

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +9

      Ohh!! Wonderful! I love making this craft, every time it turns out a little different ❤️

  • @user-mb4ee1pg2h
    @user-mb4ee1pg2h Před 2 měsíci +6

    Your words are wise and true. Amazing at your ‘few’ years on this earth. I will be 77 years old and I must say, you are ‘right on target’. Having been with you for awhile now, I am so proud of you. You are truly beautiful and I must say, that lil boy in your being is so fortunate! God will continue to bless you dear one. ❤ Trust you will be criticized for your joy! That is sadly the way of life on earth. We will continue to promote joy and peace no matter what!!!

  • @Gwaycee
    @Gwaycee Před 2 měsíci +33

    Your face is glowing, and it's a joy to watch you grow bigger and embrace motherhood with all your being.

    • @cindygaudet1390
      @cindygaudet1390 Před 2 měsíci +2

      I agree!pregnancy agrees with her❤and love her clothes.

    • @sherryallen4537
      @sherryallen4537 Před 2 měsíci +2

      I agree too, Poala you look so beautiful!! I think a woman looks her best when expecting even though she may not feel that way!

  • @debbiewilder4738
    @debbiewilder4738 Před 2 měsíci +5

    I call that positiveness, hope in Christ. I cant do it on my own But it's an interdependent relationship where I have to do the best I can and He covers the rest and even though I'm still sad and grieving some things that I've lost ,my hope is inJjesus that I can get past this and b present and live the rest of my life. ♡❤ God bless you your baby and your husband.

  • @StellarumCreative
    @StellarumCreative Před 2 měsíci +20

    I grew up at my grandma’s house (during the day), a few miles from a small local airfield in western WA that had year round hot air balloon flights, so I was fortunate enough to get to watch the balloons every afternoon while playing in the backyard. I miss it so much.

  • @Malgorbia
    @Malgorbia Před 2 měsíci +23

    I believe there is nothing I can’t do. Full stop. And I believe that in everyone. I’m a stone cold engineer STEM head but I am an unstoppable optimist. Lots of people get bothered by that, and they especially get bothered when I actually DO the thing! Haha! But then after slowly I’ve found I look around again and suddenly those same people are pushing harder, believing more, and standing taller. I might not be the gentlest individual ha! But I do like to think I can light the fire. And sometimes that’s exactly what people need. Never stop believing in the future. There’s so many of us out here fighting for it too. In all different ways. Walking through the dark with others is an adventure, and if it gets the children of the future to the next dawn it will be worth every step. : ) Thanks for your lovely videos.

    • @MagicalMindsByAmra
      @MagicalMindsByAmra Před 2 měsíci +2

      Love this! We need people to light the fire☄️to show that fire can be lit!

    • @claremiller9979
      @claremiller9979 Před 2 měsíci +1

      I love your energy, I want to carry it with me all day

    • @SGTJones2009
      @SGTJones2009 Před 2 měsíci +3

      Thank you for this beautiful reminder that our hope and determination is a gift we give to others, sometimes unknowingly. There is so much I've done that I might never have done if someone hadn't lived out that possibility before me.

  • @chayanika8155
    @chayanika8155 Před 2 měsíci +30

    This positivity is a trait common in many of the people that I admire.

  • @lailalivsdatter6660
    @lailalivsdatter6660 Před 2 měsíci +58

    It is a beautiful message.
    I agree with you. For all people.
    Believe in your healing. Believe in yourself.
    All of us can reach far. We can reach the stars❤

  • @lorij9649
    @lorij9649 Před 2 měsíci +33

    I commuted for work from Sonoma, California to Napa, CA and would leave Sonoma around 8:00 am. Many many mornings on my drive I would see the Balloons and always loved it.

  • @kartikis.9144
    @kartikis.9144 Před měsícem

    Ma'am thank you. You have no idea how many souls you're calming down, showing them a life, without turmoil but genuine care for themselves and other souls around them.

  • @squishysirenita
    @squishysirenita Před 2 měsíci +3

    Just wanted to share a gem of a quote that my therapist shared with me when I told her I felt I was going backwards...
    "Regression is part of the progression"
    It has stuck w me (helps that it rhymes😂) I found it to be so true and has helped me immeasurably.

  • @sunshinedunker3220
    @sunshinedunker3220 Před 2 měsíci +26

    Your videos are so uplifting!
    They're not only beautiful, but filled with words of wisdom for all to contemplate.
    Thank you for making the time to share your thoughts as well as your creativity with the world. It is truly a gift for many! So happy for your journey into motherhood!
    We learn vast amounts of valuable information from raising human beings!
    Love to you always!❤

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +5

      Thank you so much for the encouragement, I am honored and hope you have an absolutely wonderful week! ❤️

  • @user-oz4od6qk1o
    @user-oz4od6qk1o Před 2 měsíci +26

    I think you were reading my mind, because I really needed this video. thank you so much!

  • @kathleenfleming7519
    @kathleenfleming7519 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Only a negative soul would criticize the gift of being positive in a situation where you experience anxiety. Stay positive, Paola. You have a beautiful soul.❤❤

  • @kimcunningham2107
    @kimcunningham2107 Před 2 měsíci +9

    Precious watching your kitty watch you. ☺️💜 Beautiful video💖💕

  • @BoitumeloSelogatwe
    @BoitumeloSelogatwe Před 2 měsíci +4

    Watching from South Africa 🇿🇦
    I am so happy I found your channel during my dark day, you have no idea how your content healed me. And for that I’ll love you forever ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @Grace-fb7jk
    @Grace-fb7jk Před 2 měsíci +2

    Unfortunately the world is full of negative and jealous people who don’t want to be removed from their misery-whatever form that takes.
    I’m glad to see you whole and happy and optimistic. You do what you can. Thank you for your lovely vids. 💕

  • @laurazeiher2549
    @laurazeiher2549 Před 2 měsíci +9

    Thank you for your courage, creativity, love, and sweetness.

  • @katiewright2232
    @katiewright2232 Před 2 měsíci +10

    As always, a beautiful and insightful video. ❤

  • @lorifarlee8704
    @lorifarlee8704 Před 2 měsíci +9

    I loved today's video. I daily try to chose to be positive and grateful and to make the world a more beautiful kind place. Your baby is going to be so blessed to have you for his wise, sweet mother.

  • @malindakolb5994
    @malindakolb5994 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I was raised by a father who taught us to work at being positive. It has helped me handle my trials and tribulations. The joy of the Lord truely is my strength. 😊

  • @deborahclavette879
    @deborahclavette879 Před 2 měsíci +14

    What a beautiful video, both visually and in content! You are a wise woman to recognize that you are more than the challenges you face - you are what you have overcome!

  • @DistinctiveThinking
    @DistinctiveThinking Před 2 měsíci +10

    Your thoughts are so spot on! The most important decision is to 'start'. Life is a journey. I like to think of it as a trail upward. There are narrow spaces, rocky terrain, exhilarating heights, quiet meadows. It is like creating an inward map. Just begin. Take that step forward. If you fall, that is good. You just get back up and keep moving your thoughts forward and toward the goal. A tumble on the trail does not make you a bad hiker. It actually will help you become more attentive to that inward landscape.
    Anxiety is a thief. You must move toward it's mask of deception with the decision to strip it of its power by being loving, kind, and gentle with 'you'. An anxious child usually just needs to be held. Soothing ourself as a child is perfectly healthy. So, cuddle in the rocking chair, snuggle near a loved animal or partner, take a long hot bath, brush your hair in rhythmic slow movements. These are some of my soothers.
    Life moves swiftly. As an older woman, I can promise that being just you is completely beautiful. ❤❤❤

    • @zaram131
      @zaram131 Před 2 měsíci +2

      Thank you for this beautiful writing. I needed the encouragement so badly. ❤️

  • @iremfeyza_luna14
    @iremfeyza_luna14 Před měsícem

    I can be a source of light in the darkness. ✨💫 "Once you decide to be that source of starlight you'll realize that there're entire galaxy of stars and you are far from alone." 🧚‍♀️ This is beautiful 💜

  • @JBFrank-qk6hy
    @JBFrank-qk6hy Před 2 měsíci +2

    Your subscribers are so thoughtful and kind. What a wonderous community. I hope you know how special this is and of course, how special you are.

  • @homebodyheaven6114
    @homebodyheaven6114 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I was desperately depressed throughout my childhood and early adult years. Never got counseling or ‘therapy’. Just kept seeking God. Life is a spiritual journey. God never let me down. Today I’m a grandmother and one of the most optimistic people you could ever meet. Don’t let the Negatives get you down. Life is Good!

  • @L.O.V.E.CaratStay
    @L.O.V.E.CaratStay Před 2 měsíci +3

    I love your quote about "nurturing the things that help us rather than hinder us." It sounds so simple but when we're constantly surrounded by negativity and daily life is a struggle, it's a lot harder to actually focus on, especially when it comes to our thought life. Anyways, it definitely gave me something to think about and I love this sweet video 🥰

  • @royhampton3
    @royhampton3 Před 2 měsíci +8

    Great message! So many of us are learning to overcome negativity and to build a more positive interior life. Your words always make me feel less alone as I travel down that path.

  • @bethanyconroy
    @bethanyconroy Před 2 měsíci +2

    To heal, we have to care more about becoming well than about being validated. That has been a tough, imperative lesson to learn.

  • @angelagrimes8237
    @angelagrimes8237 Před měsícem

    Thank you for this vlog. At 68 I am discovering what you have learned now and keep sharing. It is never too late to find peace with oneself and mindfully live life with a point of view of abundance rather than lack. It is so true that anyone can accept that the world is on fire literally and figuratively and that finding the beauty, joy and goodness of life and the world seems like a false hope. It isn’t. Being optimistic, light hearted etc isn’t difficult once you choose to be. Finding the balance is challenging but honestly, your words make it so plain and simple and doable:be the light you want to see in the world. Yes! Thank you so much! Oh and if you ever can do it go up in the ballon! It’s is a fabulous experience!

  • @nibblesname8638
    @nibblesname8638 Před 2 měsíci +2

    Sometimes you make depression your whole personality. It happened to me. It was my muse, part of my identity. That makes getting better so much harder, because it's like I'm killing part of myself, losing who I am, and even simple things like having a good day or not being in pain feel weird and unconformable, because the pain has become my everything.

    • @FG-ie7cu
      @FG-ie7cu Před 2 měsíci

      Thank you for saying this. It is making me think . . . about what is going on here, I mean.

  • @donnarakitzis2719
    @donnarakitzis2719 Před 2 měsíci +13

    I love learning along with you through your life experiences. Thank you for sharing. As always your cinematography is breathtaking.

  • @giftsofspring
    @giftsofspring Před 2 měsíci +23

    Just wow. What a beautiful festival ❤ this video is so calming. I love your art. Thank your so much for your path as a content creator and taking us along the way. 😊

  • @L0U1SE
    @L0U1SE Před 2 měsíci +1

    As a person who also suffers anxiety I have actively pursued maintaining optimism and good thoughts towards myself and others. It is impossible to be that way always but it is attainable at times and it comes back to me

  • @michellefuhrman
    @michellefuhrman Před 2 měsíci +2

    I love that you are content. Our culture pushes the more, more, more! When in reality all we need is enough. Contentment is something I am praying for in my life. Thank you for your inspiration.

  • @ImnotBebe
    @ImnotBebe Před měsícem +1

    Sometimes we have no complicated thoughts or words but we forget even very simple words can be all that some one needs to hear so I wanna tell you that I like your aesthetic.🧚‍♂️

  • @V0ID115
    @V0ID115 Před 2 měsíci +1

    In a routine where I don't have many positive things going on, this helps me keep on my track.
    Thank you for sharing your experiences and your positive attitude.

  • @amberhawke
    @amberhawke Před 2 měsíci +6

    I love those big, massive oval shaped things that float in the air! We have a balloon festival every July 4th weekend, and they are beautiful to watch. They have mass launches, they have accuracy competitions, and the pilots are quite open and friendly. My wife gifted us a balloon ride for our anniversary one year, and it was phenomenal! It's very peaceful and quiet, all you hear, besides the quiet voices of fellow passengers, is the whoosh of the flame as it warms up the air in the balloon. I highly, highly suggest that you and Luke do a balloon flight, it is an amazing experience!

  • @judithstrenio9552
    @judithstrenio9552 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I read somewhere "Pessimists are right more often but optimists are happier"
    The stance of optimism is different from denial because it refers to the future.

  • @1hf325bsa
    @1hf325bsa Před 2 měsíci +3

    I don’t suffer from chronic mental troubles, but I’ve been chronically ill since I was a child. It’s been many decades since then. I have complex conditions that there is no proper treatment or cure. One of the crucial points when the quality of my life increased was when I learned to let go of waiting for a miracle and holding on to recovery - it will never come, and it’s ok. It’s my body, my mind, and I love them endlessly just the way they are. I can learn to live with it. It might be that folks who suffer from more severe mental difficulties have to go through the same process of grief and acceptance, and this might seem like bitterness to whoever was spared the same journey. There is positivity in acceptance too. Lots of love ❤️

    • @TheCottageFairy
      @TheCottageFairy  Před 2 měsíci +1

      I hoped it was clear in this video I was not referring to all diseases and conditions, we all do or will have health problems, I was only speaking on anxiety management and trying to cultivate a better interior life instead of being unkind and critical towards oneself, which seems to be something you have done and that is lovely ❤️ I am not able to encompass all these disclaimers in one video, but I try to place some reminders. Thank you

  • @suzy1335
    @suzy1335 Před 2 měsíci +6

    So glad you share what's in your heart.

  • @itsHeatherKay
    @itsHeatherKay Před měsícem

    When you get negativity reflected back on you, it just shows how far you’ve come- moving away from a toxic mentality that we are raised in. You notice the negativity, but maybe the person producing the negativity doesn’t truly realize how bad it is. Most people breathe in and then exhale what surrounds them without realizing they are part of a society that is self-destructing. We can choose to become aware of reality and then decide not to ingest the unhelpful message being pushed. Break free to be free!

  • @MiaStayingCreative
    @MiaStayingCreative Před 2 měsíci +5

    “Negativity sells” - so true Paola! Thanks for the divine reminder. Thanks for everything you shared in this video 💕💕 keep up the great work!

  • @philomenaward1833
    @philomenaward1833 Před 2 měsíci +3

    I sense that those of us who are so very self critical find it really difficult at first, to re model that Inner life you refer to. The surprise is that it is not only possible but even a real pleasure. Nurturing the positive much as we can nurture a lovely garden where nature and ourselves work together. Thankyou for sharing the lovely outlook you are actively and consciously creating what a wonder it is and so utterly rewarding for all others you encounter.Thankyou again I so enjoy your sharings and the hotair balloons are magical. Bless you.❤

  • @jsylvest500
    @jsylvest500 Před 2 měsíci +4

    The balloon festival is so fitting for welcoming spring back! I was especially touched by listening to you recount your journey rising above negativity. It is something I constantly aspire to, often I backslide, but I'm undeterred in my desire to create a beautiful personal life.

  • @kaizen2049
    @kaizen2049 Před 2 měsíci +15

    Your videos are like therapy helps me calm down ❤❤

  • @TheAntHill184
    @TheAntHill184 Před měsícem

    I’ve been where you have been anxiety wise.
    Recovery is possible but recovery is not about the absence of anxiety but our responses to it.
    FINISH WELL!

  • @buddhabro.9130
    @buddhabro.9130 Před 2 měsíci +2

    In my spiritual path, I've learned that it's not all about gaining knowledge but maintaining an understanding of the truth of what is and maintaining inner wisdom. You made an awesome point about understanding what 'true' positivity is. Like "perfection" isn't what many think it is, Mother Nature teaches us that. 😊🙏💛

  • @flowergirl7260
    @flowergirl7260 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I think sometimes our happiness is not warmly regarded by unhappy people, but i guess that's to be expected. It just feels better to be optimistic, regardless.

  • @_isayyt_
    @_isayyt_ Před 2 měsíci +17

    this is so pretty! I have definitely struggled with anxiety and listening to what others think about me and feeling like if i do something i feel like i'll get judged for it. I always feel like no one understands my situations but i have learned through years that others have similar experiences and its ok to grow from these issues we have had in life. Such gorgeous words. ❤

  • @brittanysmith6855
    @brittanysmith6855 Před měsícem

    I have come to find that more often than not....unhappy people will never be happy about your happiness. Nor will they celebrate it's discovery. You will be met with hostility. ❤

  • @giarivera5060
    @giarivera5060 Před 2 měsíci +2

    About time ending the circle of victimism and feeling sorry for yourself. A new life is about to come and he needs a lot of attention, love and happiness. Good luck and stay positive always and no matter what.

  • @marjorieroman9591
    @marjorieroman9591 Před 2 měsíci +4

    This is so very true... Being able to get rid of the negativity as much as possible is the only real way to go through storms of life... I'm currently hardly learning that and I'm 52 since 2 days...I wish more young people like you could realize that to not waste their lifetime and live wiser, like you ❤ ... Love from France.

  • @HaneenIAdam
    @HaneenIAdam Před 2 měsíci +5

    Thank you Cottage Fairy for yet a beautiful, filled with wisdom video that tugs at the heart of my inner child and old sage self🤗
    I wish to say to every person who is suffering from a form of mental illness, from the mild to the extreme cases, do NOT believe anyone who tells you that your case is permanent. You can heal and live a good life. I has been done before, and if psychology isn't do in it for you there are many forms of healing nowadays to choose what works and clicks with you. Stay safe❤

  • @Amandinhaassis
    @Amandinhaassis Před 2 měsíci +4

    Oh my Gosh!! I love you sis! I thankful God every day for putting people that like places, things or that have the similar thought to mine. Thank you for this!! Greetings from Brazil! 🇧🇷 ❤

  • @Catlily5
    @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I can't believe that so many people told you that anxiety could not be improved. All of my therapists said that anxiety could be handled better.
    Breathing exercises have helped me a lot.

  • @iflumberg9610
    @iflumberg9610 Před 2 měsíci +4

    Im from sweden and just want you to know that i feel so att peace watching your videos

  • @katiemynette4285
    @katiemynette4285 Před 2 měsíci +2

    ❤I think so too! I PRAY for LUKE, YOU, and ❤YOUR FAMILY. KATIE!

  • @jolloyd2293
    @jolloyd2293 Před 2 měsíci +1

    In a week that's been challenging beyond measure, it has been so wonderful to tap into this...

  • @AverageAngel
    @AverageAngel Před měsícem

    I like the message about being an optimist. My dad my whole life has never said anything positive about anyone, anything, or any situation. That's 30 years straight; it even led to then school age friends complaining to me about my dad in very brief interactions. He's now in old age and doesn't have a single friend, most likely due to this negative complaining victim's attitude. So I had to recognize this in me and revert bad behaviors and habits that were unconsciously learned during childhood

  • @avantikasharma9333
    @avantikasharma9333 Před 2 měsíci +4

    Your channel is healing at its core and I often find calm through your videos. I enjoy your genuineness. You have learnt to not only build beauty inside but also outside through your various artistic pursuits which includes the videography of the channel. You capture the small joys of a creative life, your channel is very important in this world. Also would love to know the name of the book. Stay happy, stay optimistic.

  • @anitatate9852
    @anitatate9852 Před 2 měsíci +3

    Beautiful video Paola and it is so beautiful because of your peaceful, calming voice and eye for beauty outside and inside. Please ignore the naysayers, because they are just miserable, and maybe a little jealous of your positivity. You are living your best life and encouraging others to join you.

  • @icesparklefrost7511
    @icesparklefrost7511 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I want to let you know that what you said about optimism definitely resonates with me! Thank you so much for sharing your insight. You are so wise and kind. 💕 Your videos are so inspiring and lovely to watch. ☺

  • @davidhutchinson5233
    @davidhutchinson5233 Před měsícem

    You're not alone. All humans have been through some type of trauma in their lives. Even something like the loss of a job or loss of health insurance can have mental and emotional implications that go undealt with sometimes for many years. I admire you because to me it's about slowing down, being kind, to yourself, your friends, your family and nature as well. And you're right, just be yourself.

  • @stephaniebrogdon4024
    @stephaniebrogdon4024 Před 2 měsíci +2

    Seeing hot air balloons always fills me with joy! I live in Albuquerque, New Mexico and every October the Albuquerque International International Balloon Fiesta takes place and it is truly a magical experience to witness hundreds of balloons filling the sky!

  • @charlottegouverneur9313
    @charlottegouverneur9313 Před měsícem

    I'm listening to you from Belgium. It's such a pleasure to hear someone saying out loud what my soul is telling me also. It's comfortable to feel that I'm with others on that way, with this kind of feelings and opinions.
    So agree about what's to be a light with darkness around, how it's difficult at some points and how it's joyfull and increasing peace inside us also.
    Thank you 🙏❤

  • @nathalielorit9417
    @nathalielorit9417 Před 2 měsíci +2

    You are a brave and wonderful young woman. I must say that you are able to convey such peace and wellbeing through your videos, your soft voice, the beautiful images of your surroundings, your artistic handcrafts and the way of life you have chosen... that I find it hard to imagine that you may once have suffered of anxiety issues. Thank you for your beautiful videos and for your wise thoughts, they are soothing, nurturing and they reassure me that somewhere out there is the possibility to live in a better world. Take good care of yourself and the precious baby in your womb, dear Paola.

  • @TheBestOfLisaRenee
    @TheBestOfLisaRenee Před 2 měsíci +2

    I, too, am a survivor of Psychopathic abuse. Mine took place in Italy where I did not know the language over a six month period. It’s been over 7 years of recovering on my own and I’m not fully recovered, yet. I want to learn more about neuroplasticity. I wish I could move back to the countryside for my recovery and to a forested area. I need it desperately. I live in the city, alone. Without family or friends. I am alone.
    Thank you for sharing.

    • @duchess1774
      @duchess1774 Před 2 měsíci +1

      @theBestOfLisaRenee I hope you can find support for your healing journey. And nature is the greatest healer. Wishing you peace and grace.

  • @Sabrina-xr4gi
    @Sabrina-xr4gi Před měsícem

    I truly loved the messages in this video so much. I'm facing a lot of challenges at work at the moment. My optimistic good nature is ridiculed constantly. To the point that me being happy for seeing the horses in the field across the road was called sad and pathetic... yet I keep going with grace and choosing to see the good in this world. To focus on even the tiniest glimmer of hope, beauty, and goodness that makes each and every moment. To choose light and happiness over darkness and negativity. I can't deny that it can be soul crushing at times to be surrounded by such bitter people... today was extremely hard, so this video strengthened the faith back in my happy but tired heart. Thank you 💗

  • @leslieefird7062
    @leslieefird7062 Před 2 měsíci +2

    I’m so glad that you share your life and lessons etc via this video platform. While it would make a fascinating book, it’s so enjoyable to be able to share in the sights sounds and your smile. Best wishes on expected baby❤️

  • @vintagelace7076
    @vintagelace7076 Před 2 měsíci +2

    I am good at feeling my feelings..if I find myself anxious, fearful or any negative feeling I always stop and ask what am I truly upset over? What triggered this? That for me is so helpful in dealing with it. Feelings are forever changing..one moment we can be happy next moment sad..next moment disapoointed..ect. I to have gone through crippling anxiety and come through it..its a slow process but rewarding.

  •  Před 2 měsíci

    Paola's videos are are the cure to my anxiety.. When I am feeling that way, I watch your videos and my heart calms down ❤

  • @Elizabeth-theta1111
    @Elizabeth-theta1111 Před 2 měsíci

    You are a soul whose young embodiment, contaons thousands of years of wisdom. Humanity needs you...trust your journey...and thank you for being here!

  • @andreamayne3509
    @andreamayne3509 Před 2 měsíci +3

    Beautiful colours against a colourless tail end of winter, great balloon festival. ❤

  • @amandasymon4363
    @amandasymon4363 Před 2 měsíci

    So wonderful to witness the air balloons. I have fairly recently been learning about neural plasticity and I now look at life differently. Goodbye labels. I now have self belief. Thank you for all your help 🙏

  • @beautifulgirl219
    @beautifulgirl219 Před 2 měsíci +1

    The baloons, so lovely, thank you for another Paola video. Cheers. :)

  • @awilda2724
    @awilda2724 Před 2 měsíci

    I LOVE your creations, including all your videos. Thank you so much, my dear Boricua. You sooth my soul, calm my being, and reassure me there are beautiful souls in our Earth. I am 77 years old, by the way:-)

  • @LynneNicolson-ou8zi
    @LynneNicolson-ou8zi Před 2 měsíci +3

    You have a very assuring and soothing way of expressing the things many of us feel.🌿

  • @katherinec3463
    @katherinec3463 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Such a lovely wise video. I'm sure you've read Joanna Macy but I find her approach so uplifting and inspirational. She says without challenges and even dire circumstances, where would you find a hero? She encourages us all to take up our capes and welcome adversity as it makes us into superheros! Being willing to change is so powerful and freeing! Thanks Paola!