From CEOs to Single Moms: The Modern Mother's Dilemma | Real Families

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  • čas přidán 5. 10. 2020
  • From single mums to CEOs a generation of burned and disillusioned mothers are waking up and smelling the coffee: forget having it all... They are DOING it all. Is it harder to be a mother today than in any other moment in history? Working mothers are profiled in this documentary, and they talk about the challenges of balancing newborn children with career aspirations, the price one can pay for trying to balance family with a job, and more.
    Real Families brings you stories of modern day family life from around the world through the eyes of children, parents, and parenting experts.
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Komentáře • 297

  • @aparnamehta7036
    @aparnamehta7036 Před 3 lety +273

    There's one aspect missing from this documentary. Women who have had to step out of the workforce to take care of their kids and then feel like failures for not being able to work and be financially independent and have some sense of self-worth and identity that paid work would give them. Add to that the fact that they eventually start being looked at as a financial burden by their husbands.

    • @viaankaur9043
      @viaankaur9043 Před 3 lety +2

      So true.

    • @micca903
      @micca903 Před 3 lety +13

      @@rubyredjeans If you're a two income family in many cases you could potentially hire help. But there comes a point where it's just not sensible to work for the spouse who earns the least. I just think that it's a ridiculous lie to tell women that they could do it all.

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +21

      That’s the woman’s problem for choosing a man who doesn’t want to be a provider.

    • @meganhoggard2749
      @meganhoggard2749 Před 2 lety +3

      We seriously need to find a work life balance for both types of mom - working or staying at home 😩 💕

    • @meganhoggard2749
      @meganhoggard2749 Před 2 lety +15

      @@jbb8261 unbelievable. Not all men make more than $120,000 a year. There are good men that make less. And worse men that make more. I also don’t think you know how expensive it is to live anymore.

  • @madamemombeshora
    @madamemombeshora Před 2 lety +73

    I think the challenge most women face is choosing between being a full time mom to serve at home but possibly face the risk of being financially abused by your partner because you don’t contribute FINANCIALLY. It’s the one thing that pushes most women to being at the mercy of trying to balance the two.

    • @DelilahMatilda
      @DelilahMatilda Před rokem +4

      Or becoming a single mother

    • @lel2021
      @lel2021 Před rokem +5

      Shame on men who abuse their stay at home wives, they merit husbands who love, respect and cherish them. Men who treat their wives bad are not real men.

    • @Chefgrlangel
      @Chefgrlangel Před 10 měsíci +2

      Ppl shouldn’t date anyone who could treat them like that but honestly who are these villains everyone is afraid of being abused by?
      I understand cruel men exist but they are not the majority of men. Most husbands love their wives and plenty of men take pride in providing. My husband and his brothers are all hardworking and provide for their families, my father, my grandfather, every man I’ve known pretty much are generous and kind. Why do people talk about husbands like they are bad by default!? That’s not reality.

    • @anandaom6927
      @anandaom6927 Před 8 měsíci

      This. Partner says he could support us, but does not make enough to…. Is also someone who feels we could survive off a bag of rice and peanut butter… which we could, but that’s not what I want. I don’t want to have to “ask” someone just to be able to have gas in my car to leave, or buy my kid a pair of socks. No
      But as soon as I get home (it’s 5:30, I’ve picked my son up and worked 8 hours), it’s time to make dinner. I value serving my child Whole Foods, so take pleasure and pride in this…. But then it’s time to eat and maybe play for 20 minutes with my kid before it’s time to clean up and go to bed. Where are the memories? Where is the bonding? That doesn’t usually happen when I am constrained to a block of time….
      So we are free to be with each other and sleep deprived/miserable the next day, or I am drowning in mom guilt over not BEING WITH my kid…. Just always doing for…
      And damn partner has the nerve to accuse me of yelling when I try to get people to bed at a reasonable hour…. And it takes multiple times to be heard.
      I hate this. But also want to have the ability to care for my kid on my own volition and not rely on someone I don’t always trust. Even that.

    • @tierax8992
      @tierax8992 Před 7 měsíci +1

      @@Chefgrlangelit is the majority don’t invalidate other’s experiences

  • @roseballerine4395
    @roseballerine4395 Před 2 lety +31

    As a busy working mom, I don't have 42 mins to watch this.

  • @user-lt7zh4lv3b
    @user-lt7zh4lv3b Před 3 lety +95

    So true:’ you almost feel punished for having a child...’

    • @BlakJakk
      @BlakJakk Před rokem

      ....so raising your own damn children is punishment. F O H

  • @voutoo7899
    @voutoo7899 Před 2 lety +52

    This documentary is so real I am having goosebumps. I am a millennial and I feel like it is never the good time to start a family.

    • @lilianamunoz3003
      @lilianamunoz3003 Před rokem +7

      Just choose your provider husband wisely. Let it be known you want to be a stay at home mom. Who knows you may not want to be right now but it definitely is the best for the kids.

    • @natalieferrer6304
      @natalieferrer6304 Před rokem +5

      It’s never a good time to start having children but one day the door will close on that option and it will devastating

    • @jill1452
      @jill1452 Před rokem +2

      I say (as a middle aged working woman with kids), have your kids asap when you’re young… as there is never a good time. You can always refocus on work / career later when your kids are older!

    • @asimskentzos9231
      @asimskentzos9231 Před rokem +1

      @@jill1452 yes but...hopefully have them with the right man and settle!

    • @schnee78
      @schnee78 Před 8 dny

      ​@@natalieferrer6304it definitely will for some. But not all. Especially after watching videos like this one many women will be relieved.

  • @MJ31579
    @MJ31579 Před 3 lety +49

    Single moms, power to you 🙌

    • @ProfessorMommy
      @ProfessorMommy Před 2 lety +2

      👏 👏 👏

    • @meganhoggard2749
      @meganhoggard2749 Před 2 lety +2

      Not if they got pregnant by a deadbeat. We need to stop empowering single moms. Divorced moms and widow moms are not single moms.

  •  Před rokem +27

    Although I am not a mother but a father of two, I relate so much to the stories of these women. Here at home, my wife and I split all the house work and taking care of the kids. Usually I am the one taking care of most house chores, taking the kids to the doctors, cooking for the family while working from home. I consider myself lucky enough right now that the company I used to work full time allows me to work remotely part-time from a different province. Unfortunately the pay isn’t enough as a sole provider and I noticed that my boss sees me as a burden more than a potential although she’s never spoken to me about it. I had an important day once when my 1st born was still under 1yo and as I was leaving my home my wife starts having a mental meltdown, I had no choice but take my son with me to be able to get through the important day. I never forget that my boss brings that day back every once in a while to say she can’t fully count on me because that could happen again.
    Nowadays I’ve opened my own photography business and this is the only way I could come up with to get through this problem as I know no one would hire me knowing I can only work certain hours and have limited access to child care. We feel so powerless sometimes and I really wish all companies would create more opportunities for parents.
    One thing I can’t wrap my head around is why are so many companies OK with bringing your dog to work but not your children?
    Things have to change (overdue really), specially for mothers. It’s 2022 but sometimes it feels like the early 90s still. Sorry about the rant, I have a huge respect for working mothers, single or not, you are all so strong and powerful ❤️.

    • @Helinatad
      @Helinatad Před rokem +3

      Thank you for sharing your story!! You are a good and thoughtful father to support and share your part of chores as some would have act differently in your position.

    • @angelangeline9421
      @angelangeline9421 Před rokem +1

      You

    • @amruthabaskaran530
      @amruthabaskaran530 Před rokem +1

      Rodrigo, you are a wonderful father, husband, and a good human. I pray that your photography picks up or your boss sees you as a potential. Keep setting good example, and someone watching you will benefit from your example. Thank you for being a kind-hearted human.

  • @monikakrajewska2191
    @monikakrajewska2191 Před 2 lety +31

    I'm a working mom and I can tell that is better to have well raised kids that chase carrier , eventually you will retired or will be fired , your success in raising kids will stay

  • @MJ31579
    @MJ31579 Před 3 lety +64

    It's just like sometimes they think you have unlimited capacity to just go on and on and on, and with a smile on your face.

    • @pixie_dust2089
      @pixie_dust2089 Před 2 lety +7

      the problem lies with women not speaking up about this to their partners or children. they are so wrapped up around the idea that they can do it all . being the ideal superhero and trophy wife.

    • @marisa9832
      @marisa9832 Před rokem

      @@pixie_dust2089 you think that’s the MAIN problem? You don’t see any external problems? Where would that frustration be coming from in the first place? Yes, communication is so important in finding a better solution for these issues, but that’s not the root

    • @northstar2621
      @northstar2621 Před měsícem

      It's the partners and children not caring. ​@@pixie_dust2089

  • @baseemabaseema1415
    @baseemabaseema1415 Před 11 měsíci +10

    I HATE being a working mom. I wish I could stay home with the kids, it’s such a stressful life to have three kids and work. One blessing is I work from home, I can’t imagine working outside the home ever again. That was even worse.

    • @Ehlaar
      @Ehlaar Před 6 měsíci +3

      Exact same boat here but If you dont work you risk financial abuse and guilt.

  • @4ctina246
    @4ctina246 Před 3 lety +51

    And this was pre COVID imagine how we are felling now...

  • @quelquun2018
    @quelquun2018 Před 2 lety +13

    There are a lot of married single mom’s out here.

  • @AG-wb3db
    @AG-wb3db Před 2 lety +27

    I am a stay at home mom and housewife. I am happy with that.
    I am good enough.

  • @linhaton4957
    @linhaton4957 Před 3 lety +79

    We women can have it all. Sometimes not all at the same time. I believe our children should come first.

    • @xarzneimittel8220
      @xarzneimittel8220 Před 3 lety +22

      I believe they should come first to men too.

    • @celestejacobs5089
      @celestejacobs5089 Před 3 lety +9

      I believe women who want a career should just not have children. Its pretty simple.

    • @cotybrock2372
      @cotybrock2372 Před 3 lety +8

      @@celestejacobs5089 it’s not a women’s choice always to work or to not. Did you listen to it all...

    • @hemmapermal532
      @hemmapermal532 Před 3 lety +10

      @@celestejacobs5089 is that rule applies to men as well?

    • @ryanmcgarry-winne5015
      @ryanmcgarry-winne5015 Před 3 lety +6

      @@celestejacobs5089 same for men

  • @babehhvee
    @babehhvee Před 2 lety +27

    I really wish I can send this to my employer. I currently have an executive director who wants to push for minorities, yet doesn't want to understand the struggle of women and newly mothers returning to the workforce, including minority women. Make that make sense.

    • @pixie_dust2089
      @pixie_dust2089 Před 2 lety +3

      my mother had the exact problem . and add it with 2 kids almost same in age and one child needing special care

    • @Ai-yq8rb
      @Ai-yq8rb Před 2 lety +2

      @Ash Hegde are you sure it wasn't vice verse?

    • @natalieferrer6304
      @natalieferrer6304 Před rokem

      Sounds like your boss is racist and will be sued. You can’t hire based on race

  • @I_Am_NiiTA
    @I_Am_NiiTA Před 3 lety +29

    My mental health couldn't handle this........ No kids for me 😭😭😭😭😭

  • @samd5332
    @samd5332 Před 3 lety +39

    It really does take a village.

  • @IndigoBellyDance
    @IndigoBellyDance Před 2 lety +6

    Soooooooooooo much truth here. I Hope Men And Dads step up and pay attention

  • @joyault3576
    @joyault3576 Před 3 lety +81

    I'm not a mother, I couldn't have children, so please don't judge me. Why are men not helping out? Good God, this is 2020, not 1920! Why are women doing all the cleaning, laundry, cooking, &, child care? Come on ladies! STOP this cycle! Good God! Or have him ✂ the goods!❤

    • @blessings4life
      @blessings4life Před 3 lety +4

      They don’t want to 😒

    • @livelifetothefullest721
      @livelifetothefullest721 Před 3 lety +11

      Because some women dont teach the men to do 50/50!!! I mean you have to know that these men are lazy before you marry and procrate with them

    • @kingjamization
      @kingjamization Před 3 lety +1

      Probably because when we do we are seen as the simping beta males that are there to be caregivers instead of the husband and provider, then women get bored of us, cheat, take the kids along with half of our assets and pay

    • @kara2162
      @kara2162 Před 3 lety +8

      Mom guilt.. we do it all until we hit a wall 😕

    • @maximillion8442
      @maximillion8442 Před 3 lety +11

      *Come on, MEN! Stop this cycle!
      Totally get what you're saying, and you're not in the wrong. But it sucks that women are so often held responsible for holding men responsible :/

  • @jill1452
    @jill1452 Před rokem +7

    Great documentary! I also wonder if we should be talking about the implications on the kids. I know personally that I am a much better Mom when I am not busy with work or when I have had a break from work. I think my kids suffer unfortunately when I am under a lot of stress because of work or I just don’t have as much time… what’s the impact on them (the kids) when both parents work?

  • @marybuschbacher1883
    @marybuschbacher1883 Před 3 lety +20

    I know of a man. who stays at home. He has 4 girls. He told me he loves being at home.

  • @michellesantana7461
    @michellesantana7461 Před 3 lety +14

    Why having a third child?

  • @redhot654
    @redhot654 Před 3 lety +69

    Almost like having a breadwinner and a homemaker was a common arrangement for a reason!

    • @Champ-tt5id
      @Champ-tt5id Před 3 lety +14

      Who would've thought, right?

    • @courtneydolly6538
      @courtneydolly6538 Před 3 lety +12

      Thank you for this, like how obviously predictable was this.

    • @lesliecano4963
      @lesliecano4963 Před rokem +1

      Agreed. I’ve been searching for a homemaker husband.

  • @redhot654
    @redhot654 Před 3 lety +56

    The harsh economic climate is a direct result of two income families becoming the norm.

    • @redhot654
      @redhot654 Před 3 lety +7

      @Freddie Boom Boom Washington I didn't shame anyone, and I dont want anyone to have to rely on the government. But that's what happens with 2 income families being the norm, the government raises your kids

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +2

      Not the norm if you get out of the renting hellhole, own your home, have paid off cars, and don’t live off credit cards.

    • @redhot654
      @redhot654 Před 3 lety +2

      @@jbb8261 home prices have surged sooo much in Canada over the past few years...one factor is the norm of 2 income households.

    • @voutoo7899
      @voutoo7899 Před 2 lety

      Fr 💯

    • @BirdyMum
      @BirdyMum Před 2 lety +6

      @@redhot654 same here in Australia. The only people I know who own their own homes before 40 are dual income earners who have chosen not to have kids. Rent here can take up most of your paycheck, so how does someone save enough for a house deposit? It's insane.

  • @lesliecano4963
    @lesliecano4963 Před rokem +5

    Well, I figured I wasn’t depressed enough already so I watched this documentary. Now I’ll read an update on the gender pay gap. Then I’ll be in the perfect temperature of depression soup.

  • @kirstyrichardson9815
    @kirstyrichardson9815 Před rokem +4

    My constant battle of been a good mum and been ambitious

  • @OM-yj9gm
    @OM-yj9gm Před 3 lety +57

    Man need to be held accountable ASAP ! They need to take on their responsibilities now !!

  • @jbb8261
    @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +40

    I couldn’t be happier that the workforce pushed me out when I became a mother. I stay at home now and can take MUCH better care of my children than anyone in some daycare could. No thanks, not coming back to the corporate world. Ever.

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 2 lety +1

      @Ash Hegde you didn’t even ask if I make money. I do, remote work exists 😬 I also make more money selling breast milk and old clothes than I did from some hourly jobs. Sooooo try again.

    • @lorascelsi8102
      @lorascelsi8102 Před rokem +2

      Enjoy your children. Wise choice.

    • @Chefgrlangel
      @Chefgrlangel Před 10 měsíci +1

      I wasn’t in the corporate world but was in a male dominated high stress career that would have made being a mother impossible for me. Anyways just wanted to say I keep seeing your comments, I relate and agree. I’m happy for all of us doing what’s best for our families and ourselves.

  • @maryp94
    @maryp94 Před 3 lety +19

    I think the problem is not that you cant have everything is that you cant have it at the same time. I have seen the very successfull men in their careers but they werent the best parents because they werent there they would work from 8 am till 22 pm. I think women dont see this part we want to do it all perfect and the reality is that is impossible, if you try being perfect at everything you are going to end halfassing something. In a perfect world you would try to find a balance but it is not always possible, and you are not going to be super successfull because their is going to be somebody else that is going to give a 100%

    • @MichelleASamiee
      @MichelleASamiee Před 3 lety +3

      Why is Norway getting this right and Switzerland? It can be done but we must make changes and change this old fashioned idea that of all a mother must do to be labeled as a "Good Mother".

    • @maryp94
      @maryp94 Před 2 lety

      @zum zum and why are you assuming I'm a feminist?

    • @dunfordjoseph1977
      @dunfordjoseph1977 Před 2 lety +1

      hello dear how are you doing today you got a nice comment im Dunford from Miami Florida what about you?

    • @maryp94
      @maryp94 Před 2 lety

      @@dunfordjoseph1977 Thank you Dunford

    • @dunfordjoseph1977
      @dunfordjoseph1977 Před 2 lety

      @@maryp94 you welcome where are you from?

  • @gatorpower7478
    @gatorpower7478 Před 3 lety +34

    I’m to lazy or unmotivated to have children it’s so overwhelming I rather not

  • @auntyjo1792
    @auntyjo1792 Před 3 lety +6

    Literally leaning in made me laugh.

  • @FunctionalSpeechTherapy
    @FunctionalSpeechTherapy Před 2 lety +23

    I think its a bigger problem then just working moms, this same issue impacts working dads who want to be part of the children's lives too! And I think the workforce is less flexible and understanding of dads.

    • @rigoslittleshop9430
      @rigoslittleshop9430 Před rokem +2

      Yes! I am single dad and trust me I do my share when I have my kids on my days and that's half the week. Single moms and dads struggle so much and it's funny when family members say "everything takes sacrifice" easy to say when you don't have someone that can easily say "that's fine I got the kids".

  • @donnaallgaier-lamberti3933
    @donnaallgaier-lamberti3933 Před 3 lety +39

    Boy do I relate...This is my story. Where is the responsibility of the fathers in this issue?

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +9

      Fathers provide and mothers are caretakers. What’s difficult about this.

    • @meganhoggard2749
      @meganhoggard2749 Před 2 lety +2

      @@jbb8261 THAT MEN CANT PROVIDE IN THID COSTLY LIVING THESE DAYS AND A LOT DONT HELP AROUND THE HOUSE EITHER. THEY SAY THEYLL HELP BUT

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 2 lety +3

      @@meganhoggard2749 men you choose maybe. I can’t relate. I’m a stay at home wife

    • @meganhoggard2749
      @meganhoggard2749 Před 2 lety +1

      @@jbb8261 jb, how about you say that to EVERY mom that has to work? What a c word

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 2 lety +8

      @@meganhoggard2749 I think getting so triggered that you call me a c word means you have far more problems than I do. It isn't my fault that they have to work. I work too, just not so much that it takes me away from my family.

  • @liesrebsamen9867
    @liesrebsamen9867 Před 2 lety +7

    Hello, I'm from Switzerland m(the german part) here it is even worse. Childcare in way to expensive. most people can't pay it. so... the woman pay the price.
    I'm a working mum of 2 and I get soooo much negative feedback and bad eyes.
    No day school. a couple of hours then back home , after 1,5 h back to school ect; there is NO suppervision from the school in between classes. so,....
    impossible to work, no boss will be that flexible.
    really rea

  • @Vanadeo
    @Vanadeo Před 2 lety +8

    Being childfree does mean you have more money, it's not rocket science. Why are these people complaining? They wanted it all, got it all, and they're still not happy? Maybe they should've done some actual thinking with their brains instead of their egos and who knows, they'd maybe be better off.

    • @Moratuoa12
      @Moratuoa12 Před rokem +3

      Thats true. One always has to make a choice and live with the consequences. You cannot have your cake and eat it too...

  • @Seeker0fTruth
    @Seeker0fTruth Před 3 lety +35

    I think we need to address the language as well. They keep mentioning “mothering” which reinforces the notion that mothers are the ones raising children. How about a definition of “mothering” and how does it differ from “fathering”. I’m not as interested in the Webster definition but rather what they mean in the documentary.

    • @user-lt7zh4lv3b
      @user-lt7zh4lv3b Před 3 lety +4

      Excellent point Truthseeker, language affects our thoughts and it reinforces social roles and norms! The term parenting should be used always

    • @micca903
      @micca903 Před 3 lety +4

      I think you're looking for parenting. The definition is there. But a large group of women still feel that being a mother is very different from being a father. So you can change the language but women need to be willing to change. I don't see that change happening any time soon.

  • @annslayton1807
    @annslayton1807 Před rokem +2

    I was moved to a different role because "I was pregnant and wouldn't be able to travel as much" quote unquote.

  • @elleningalls5434
    @elleningalls5434 Před 3 lety +32

    I'm not a mother and have no children. But at the other end of the spectrum it shouldn't be assumed because im single with no kids i can work whenever. Everybody deserves there time off and time to themselves. I feel like if you choose to have kids. You need to consider things. Do you have time will you have time etc. I think folks think because folks are single they should do it all. Well as a single person I have to do it all myself. Because when somebody has a spouse or a significant other. They have a other half that can help out. Whereas a single person doesn't.
    I have considered having kids. But even if i was married childcare costs alot. Hence why im single. And since i haven't had kids. I cant afford it on my own.
    Yes i believe the ideal have it all. It never existed. It was kind of a myth.
    As im reading the comments. All the folks saying that man needs to step up. Its who they decided to marry. If you have a man who you married and stuff hadn't been discussed. And he doesn't step up. That's who you married. Need to make sure you know your significant other etc before you start having kids and get married etc.
    I get them wanting to give options of hrs to folks having kids. And not making it called a certain thing for only mothers.
    But at the same time.just because your single and have no kids, doesn't mean you shouldn't have options of certain hrs etc. I mean make it fair across the board?🤷

    • @adjjal
      @adjjal Před 2 lety +1

      Thank you so much this is the most balanced well thought out comment I've read here. You're absolutely right

    • @natalieferrer6304
      @natalieferrer6304 Před rokem +1

      Also it’s not fair to have to pay extra taxes for someone to take care of their kids.it’s one thing to make sure we have an educated future but we shouldn’t have to hear we have to pay for babysitting

  • @susiemac9816
    @susiemac9816 Před rokem +2

    woman tend to be mom and worker, where as men are just working.. so now moms do both jobs.- more guys help now but it is still going to be 1 person who does BOTH jobs.. making it nearly impossible to "do it all"

  • @Ehlaar
    @Ehlaar Před 6 měsíci

    My husband works 56+ hours a week I work 24/7 on call. 30 percent for my employer 40 hours a week and the rest for my family. If I stop my pile builds up. He clocks out someone else clocks in.I can’t stop. And more we just started going to church my dumb self took on responsibilities there. And just going to church adds to my work load and knocks out a repair day. Motherhood is no joke.

  • @bgsonsthriving.
    @bgsonsthriving. Před 3 lety +2

    True

  • @MissEddieBlueKawaiiKrafts
    @MissEddieBlueKawaiiKrafts Před 3 lety +12

    Blackberry? Was this made in 2010 lol. Now I want a Blackberry again 😋

  • @julieseely
    @julieseely Před 2 lety +8

    “It seems in the feminist fight for equality something was left out of the equation: children.”

  • @ujalgorchu6114
    @ujalgorchu6114 Před rokem +1

    What is the copyright license for this? Could I use it for a short film?

  • @sammiegirl883
    @sammiegirl883 Před rokem +5

    We ask working moms who's taking care of the kids but not working dad's the same question. If women are going to financially provide for the family men need to be equal partners and take their domestic portion. Children would love to have their father's care as much as their mother's.

  • @SpiritualTarotGoddess
    @SpiritualTarotGoddess Před 4 měsíci +1

    WE DO NOT HAVE GRANDMOTHER'S, GRANDPARENTS 😢

  • @pearlivory3483
    @pearlivory3483 Před 7 měsíci

    I’m concerned right now. Got married 2 years ago and we want kids but I’m an accounting manager and I work in public accounting and my work is 24/7. A real 9 to 5 would be great haha.

  • @crocus5632
    @crocus5632 Před 3 měsíci

    The problem is the corporate world and the full time jobs. How I made it here is Europe: I am a tax advisor. Did my exams before I got my 2 kids, worked part time for 15 years after that, had my parents near me watching the kids when they were not very ill, devided sick days (2 weeks a year each) with my husband. Oh and in Austria we enjoy social security: between 8 months - 2 years partially paid maturity leave, of course full social insurance, and very cheap kindergartens which cost between 70-250 euro per month, availavle to all who works. Now we are opening our own business in my field, so I hope for even more flexibility working from home, making my own hours, taking holiday when I decide. When I read the book Working Mom I hoped the end would be different: I hoped the Mom would leave her toxic corporation and open her own office or start a free lance, maybe together with other women. I think part time and freelance is the way to go for our world, and men should work part time, too. Like in Scandinavia or in France (maximum 35 hours a week).

  • @BlakJakk
    @BlakJakk Před rokem +3

    Marry before you carry, choose better, raise your own kids and shut up

  • @OM-yj9gm
    @OM-yj9gm Před 3 lety +30

    So true !!!! Feminism is not over, children and home need to come into the equation now !!!!

    • @OM-yj9gm
      @OM-yj9gm Před 3 lety +9

      Man also need to be held accountable ASAP !

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +2

      @@OM-yj9gm my husband provides and I’m able to be at home with the kids. Don’t generalize 🤡

    • @roxannesmith4519
      @roxannesmith4519 Před 2 lety +3

      Feminism devalued unpaid labour women did as home makers and mothers.

  • @jonathan_1465
    @jonathan_1465 Před 9 měsíci

    Kids do not NEED their moms every waking moment of the day - any more than anyone needs anyone else every waking moment of the day. "Working mom" is a human construct with a double disclaimer that caused half the population (women) to examine their identities in polarized, abstract terms - which one are you? It's either/or, but you can't be or do both WELL.
    When I was 7, my mom stopped working to spend more time with me and my sister. My father was stealing the money she earned (ie forcing her with threats to deposit every last paycheck into his account). And yet, even though I was happy on the one hand to have her around more, eventually I could tell she was somewhat bereft. And since we were in school 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, how much did we NEED her 24-7 when we were already occupied? When she mustered up the courage to return to work 6 years later, I was overjoyed. Because then I thought, "She's going to get to have her OWN MONEY!"
    Believe it or not, not all children are so selfish as to not comprehend the needs of others, which includes their moms.

    • @Ehlaar
      @Ehlaar Před 6 měsíci

      When you werent in school though you needed her.

  • @acajudi100
    @acajudi100 Před 3 lety +4

    Vasectomies and tubes tied from birth. I was married 10 years, before having one daughter at 37, and I never killed my unborn. Husband had deal breakers, so I raised her from conception.

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety +2

      Why’d you choose a husband with deal breakers

  • @laraanderson5445
    @laraanderson5445 Před rokem

    What about the ones with 1 income (as a solo parent) working full-time as a Mother, with ALL of that guilt and paying full-time child care and at the end of their hectic full-time work still have to be the sole physical and emotional (and financial) support to their children (yet they also have the responsibility to show their kids how to look after themselves as an adult) with 0 support from their 'village' because their parents (grandparents of their children) will only take their Grandchildren 'if they behave' otherwise they can go home! Yet when they as parents left their children on a weekly basis with their parents (grandparents) (ie never actually looked after their own kids) regardless (as they all HAD to work) the hypocrisy is ludicrous!!!!! xo

  • @stevewolf7480
    @stevewolf7480 Před 3 lety +30

    Husband must provide and protect their families,mothers have to take care of children,it's natural.

    • @hemmapermal532
      @hemmapermal532 Před 3 lety +27

      Then comes culture of men enslaving women by cutting them of financial freedom and constantly sitting on high horse thinking the whole family is depending on him.

    • @kmtz1107
      @kmtz1107 Před 3 lety +7

      @@hemmapermal532 A real man will never do that…if one is cultured and trained well, he’ll never feel the need to oppress another in order to inflate his ego.

    • @Alena-xoxo
      @Alena-xoxo Před 3 lety +6

      @@hemmapermal532 Unfortunately I have seen this happen first hand with my older sister. But I as well have seen the good men that do not do that, that is why it is important 2 properly vet your husband and honestly have a trusted male family member do it too that way your emotions do not deter you from the actual truth in case if he is truly no good.

    • @jbb8261
      @jbb8261 Před 3 lety

      @@hemmapermal532 it’s 2021. That’s not happening 😂

    • @MJ31579
      @MJ31579 Před 3 lety +7

      Just adding "it's natural" to a statement is a lazy way to make an argument

  • @MissMichelleluvshugo
    @MissMichelleluvshugo Před 3 lety +2

    This is what I'm going through

  • @babeskjo
    @babeskjo Před měsícem

    “Motherhood is the unfinished business on feminism”…true

  • @thegreatoutdoors2568
    @thegreatoutdoors2568 Před 2 měsíci

    I understand the problem but what practical solutions has anyone found other than quit for a while and struggle in all these ways with a loss of income, respect, and self identity or do it all and miss irreplaceable time with the kids

  • @chandchand5355
    @chandchand5355 Před rokem +4

    This is why i haven't had children and I'm 39...women can not have it all unless u have a rich husband. My focus has been my career ....i also have a dog she's enough.

  • @linhaton4957
    @linhaton4957 Před 3 lety +34

    Children are not pets. They need lots of love and time with mom and dad. Don't have kids if it's too much.

    • @ShwetaRamkumar
      @ShwetaRamkumar Před 3 lety +5

      Agreed that's why I am childfree but a very devoted dog owner / mum to a needy, demanding, traumatised n anxious rescue dog, I put all my time energy n resources into giving him the best life and never complain about it, dogs (depending on their nature) take up a lot of time and energy as well so they're not substitutes for children the way you put it

  • @lel2021
    @lel2021 Před rokem +5

    It's impossibile to be full time working parents and have children. You don't have time for yourself, not talk even about husband and children. People work too much, the quality of life got worst a lot. People are forced to work like slaves, for miserable salary, it's demeaning and degrading. The institute of family is destroyed. Two full time working parents can't family an children, it's impossible. Parents and children are very unhappy in these families.

    • @user-my4lf4bx6v
      @user-my4lf4bx6v Před rokem +1

      It isn't lol
      Both my parents work full time
      Problem is somehow 8 hours per day isn't considered "full time" by many Americans

  • @stephenlaing1738
    @stephenlaing1738 Před 8 měsíci +1

    Try analyzing your life finding out what you really want rather than what everybody expects of you.

  • @magdap28
    @magdap28 Před 3 lety +15

    The reason why at 30 years old I don't want to have a child.

    • @Melly16yr10
      @Melly16yr10 Před 2 lety +4

      3 years younger and same

    • @roxannesmith4519
      @roxannesmith4519 Před 2 lety

      I was the same at 30… then I turned 35 and things changed.

    • @magdap28
      @magdap28 Před 2 lety +1

      @@roxannesmith4519 what made you change your mind ?

    • @lilianamunoz3003
      @lilianamunoz3003 Před rokem +1

      Just choose your provider husband wisely. Stay home with your kids.

    • @iiiiii7739
      @iiiiii7739 Před rokem

      @@lilianamunoz3003 some women would rather work

  • @marycollier91
    @marycollier91 Před 2 měsíci

    Add another layer with being a single working mom.... And single not by choice

  • @pce12345
    @pce12345 Před 2 lety +2

    Emilie's husband needs to step up

  • @danbruno5945
    @danbruno5945 Před měsícem

    Best thing to do is agree in seperation and do 50/50 with the father 1 week on 1 week off this would tackle the burden
    Many fathers would be privileged to be able to do 50/50 the issue is alot of mothers want to take on everything 100% after separation so you cant win 😂

  • @Gabyandco777
    @Gabyandco777 Před 2 lety +16

    well i have a very different opinion on this documentary. Not surprised to hear these women bashing men, blaming the men, etc.
    the reality is ,whether you want to accept it or not is that God wired women different than men period! This is why men don't feel that they have to "do it all" or "balance it all" because their God given role is to be PROVIDER, and the women to be the nurturer and to care for the children and home, this is not to say that they shouldn't help. On the contrary, it is their obligation as leaders of the home and father. However even if women formed 100% of high power positions, they still would feel guilt!! not because society causes this, but because at their core they know that its their duty. To be honest this feminism movement has only hurt women. It is obvious that women are intelligent and highly capable of achieving "success", but ask yourself, what is true success ?

    • @penny4thought168
      @penny4thought168 Před 2 lety

      I don't think that's entirely accurate. A woman is not a good mother just because she was born a women, same goes for men. It depends on personality. Some women are better fit at home, others are better fit in the workplace. Some men are better at home, others on the workplace.

    • @Gabyandco777
      @Gabyandco777 Před 2 lety +3

      @@penny4thought168 I firmly believe what I have posted, I believe we have the capacity to be great in a lot of areas, I think many women’s way of thinking is corrupted by society and liberal ideologies. I’m not saying that a woman shouldn’t work or have a career but I can sssure you if you have children and you are devoted to your career, that priorities are not in order. It is what it is whether we agree or not. In women who don’t love being at home it’s because it has been cultivated in them that success is outside of the home but that is a false narrative.

    • @penny4thought168
      @penny4thought168 Před 2 lety +1

      @@Gabyandco777 My mom worked while raising me. She was a loving mother who raised me well. Her priorities were perfect.
      I am a woman who hates children. They're annoying, sticky, loud, and overall obnoxious. I've tried babysitting before and hated it. Just because I'm a woman does not mean I love children and will be a good parent.
      Look at all the domestic abuse cases across the globe. Do you really think all women are perfect and love their children unconditionally? If you do, you're living a lie. Not everyone was made to be a mother or father. Some are better at it, and it isn't defined by our genitals.

    • @Gabyandco777
      @Gabyandco777 Před 2 lety +2

      @@penny4thought168 of course i don’t think anyone is perfect, I’m specifically replying to the content provided in this documentary. Your response sounds like your personal issues. I know everyone’s situation is different. People decide to not have kids for many reasons. I’m speaking based on my opinion based on the Bible period.

    • @Ratslikecookies
      @Ratslikecookies Před 2 lety

      This 💯

  • @natalieferrer6304
    @natalieferrer6304 Před rokem +13

    I chose to be a homemaker I live like women for thousands of years. I just can’t cope with modern womanhood. I am home with my kids in a cozy home. My husband takes care of the bills I take care of kids and home. I feel so sad for women who never wanted feminism and are working that want to be home. I also don’t want my husbands taxes to go up to help pay for other’s children childcare. I’m sorry

  • @BlakJakk
    @BlakJakk Před rokem +1

    If you're not going to stay at home and be devoted to your kids why not give the father custody??.... Because you can't get a check that way

    • @michelinethompson9042
      @michelinethompson9042 Před rokem +1

      Did you watch this video to be a support system or to judge? I’m confused.

    • @BlakJakk
      @BlakJakk Před rokem +2

      @@michelinethompson9042 you're probably always confused

  • @jaskell2057
    @jaskell2057 Před rokem +1

    Kevin Samuels undefeated. Accountability is kryptonite for these 304's single mothers 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️😂😂😂😂🤫🤭✌

  • @maximillion8442
    @maximillion8442 Před 3 lety +15

    We've empowered women
    We have not empowered traditional femininity
    Through the efforts of pioneering feminists, society has become more accepting of women fulfilling traditionally masculine characteristics or roles
    *SARCASM ALERT* And why wouldn't they? The patriarchy is enraptured by men and traditional masculinity - of course women would want to portray these roles. It's threatening, perhaps, but it's still definitely an improvement on a feminine woman yuck ;)
    We've successfully taught society that masculinity isn't necessarily tied to one biosex and is equally valuable regardless of its host.
    Now we have to do that for femininity.
    How does our society measure value? Money.
    1. Parental leave is a must. And parental, not just maternal. Embue parents' workplace w fundamental family values in our capitalist society by ascribing both parents equal capital value of their nurturing potential.
    2. Nurturing jobs need to pay more. Emotional labor is labor. Soft skills are skills. Plus, if the jobs pay more, that will serve as an incentive for men to join caring professions. In doing so, they will help to further the crucial disjointing of gender from biosex from capitalistic potential.
    3. Hopefully, this will empower men to feel more at home in the home and help women enforce equal distribution of domestic and childcare labor.
    Bc, even without having had kids, I can understand to some degree what these women are going thru. I have a small nuclear family but a huge extended family.
    In the extended family, starting at 10 years old, I was responsible for other children. Not my 14yo brother, me. And if I had the gall to point out that not only was that unfair, but I was somewhat unqualified a la age requirements for this sort of work, suddenly "we weren't talking about your brother, we were talking about you" and "you're gonna have to learn to do this and multitask eventually, might as well start building that character now." I mean. Ffs.
    And for anyone, guys or gals, reading this and not recognizing it: I'm happy to hear that! But for most girls, those from lower class families, those from middle class families clinging to their social status, and those from families w a traditional roles and philosophies informed and enforced by elements of culture such as religion or political philosophy, it's completely normal and encouraged:
    You're female, so you're there to be a sidekick to maximize associated males' earning potential. You're free domestic and childcare labor; after all, it's not like it's REAL work, right?
    But also: on top of that, you better be ambitious and self-sufficient in your own career in that extra time that exists in the ether somewhere. Bc otherwise you're a weak, antifeminist failure who proves to the world why women can't handle real, manly responsibilities. It blows.

  • @herculesh1907
    @herculesh1907 Před 2 lety +3

    Where are the husbands?

  • @jacquehayes1984
    @jacquehayes1984 Před rokem +3

    This is why Im not a mom. I can't fathom working and not being the one raising my kids. The world is not set up for moms

  • @alexislane1035
    @alexislane1035 Před rokem

    I hate the message that others should pay for your childcare. NO! I got a good education so that I can work part time and pay for my own childcare. Quit asking for handouts!

  • @amyketchum5829
    @amyketchum5829 Před 3 lety +5

    I'm a stay at home mom with no money and the father doesn't even supply anything for us. I have to ask my own mother for the stuff me and my children need.

    • @deeehi3
      @deeehi3 Před 3 lety +5

      Police

    • @tttai8993
      @tttai8993 Před 3 lety +2

      You need figure out a way to get an income, save up and leave your baby's father. He's financially abusing you and usually it doesn't get better only worse.

    • @Alena-xoxo
      @Alena-xoxo Před 3 lety +1

      How was he before all of this? Was he any different? If not then I am sorry to say but it is your fault for marrying someone who was like tht from the get go let alone having a baby with someone like that.
      On the other hand if he changed then you should talk with him and if nothing changes then honestly it is best to leave because he just does not care at that point.

    • @amyketchum5829
      @amyketchum5829 Před 3 lety

      @@Alena-xoxo no always been the same.

    • @Alena-xoxo
      @Alena-xoxo Před 3 lety +1

      @@amyketchum5829 Ahh okay. Sorry girl but you brought it on yourself. Maybe you thought he would change right so that is why you stuck with him? Unfortunately not many men change from who they really are. Actually people in general.

  • @didipop7731
    @didipop7731 Před 4 měsíci

    We as women did this to ourself with feminism. We literally coined the phrase “have it all”, which we currently have. Little did we know no one *should* have it all at the same time, it’s too much! It’s time to admit this was a stupid idea and face the reality that women thrive in different conditions than men do.

  • @alena5484
    @alena5484 Před 2 měsíci

    This shouldn’t be a gender focused conversation. Our society and economy is not set up to allow for one working parent unless they’re helped by relatives, aka free childcare or generational wealth.

  • @palestinecryblood.freepale4333
    @palestinecryblood.freepale4333 Před 9 měsíci +1

    This is ridiculous

  • @celestejacobs5089
    @celestejacobs5089 Před 3 lety +25

    Here's an idea, if you want a high-powered, time-consuming career, don't have kids. What's complicated about this? I don't understand where this assumption comes from that every woman has to bear children.

    • @user-pc2df1np5j
      @user-pc2df1np5j Před 3 lety +9

      Exactly why I won't ever have kids,society wants everyone to live the same life and we don't have to give in.

    • @anitaramchandani7838
      @anitaramchandani7838 Před 3 lety +15

      Funny. Why can’t men just do their part of the work at home which is 50%

    • @anitaramchandani7838
      @anitaramchandani7838 Před 3 lety +5

      I meant household chores and child care equally. It is not rocket science.

    • @MichelleASamiee
      @MichelleASamiee Před 3 lety +21

      Why can't women have that and a family? Are we telling men this? No!

    • @IndigoBellyDance
      @IndigoBellyDance Před 2 lety

      U will b happy some chose to breed when u collect social security And when u r old and need help/caretakers/nurses

  • @laurenell1112
    @laurenell1112 Před 2 lety +12

    This is a synopsis of the burden modern "feminism" has placed on women. Many women did not ask for this - to be expected to care for children and household while working. This is what radical feminists have brought on. I have never been optimistic about resorting to childcare, essentially resorting to handing my child to a stranger. We need more traditional approach and appreciate children more. This is not degrading to women by any means. Society should also turn more communal as it was in the past, not closed as it has increasingly become.

    • @kilaa0007
      @kilaa0007 Před rokem +5

      rather work then be a slave to a husband that can abuse me anytime

    • @user-my4lf4bx6v
      @user-my4lf4bx6v Před rokem

      70% of Women worldwide prefer working but sure, go on

    • @iiiiii7739
      @iiiiii7739 Před rokem +3

      Y’all always blame feminism, feminism said nothing about woman having to work but making sure it’s a choice

    • @lorascelsi8102
      @lorascelsi8102 Před rokem

      1000 percent agree

    • @Chefgrlangel
      @Chefgrlangel Před 10 měsíci

      @@kilaa0007why are you already assuming you’d marry a monster?

  • @auntyjo1792
    @auntyjo1792 Před 3 lety +8

    Ridiculous expectations and for the most part self inflicted I'm afraid.

  • @naomidavis6915
    @naomidavis6915 Před 3 lety +3

    Hi

  • @lilpinkbubbles6592
    @lilpinkbubbles6592 Před rokem +1

    Men don’t feel this guilt.

  • @shawngrant3157
    @shawngrant3157 Před 3 lety +12

    here we go again it is always about white family and single white women so when are you going to included working black family and working single black mothers

    • @Yemi927
      @Yemi927 Před 2 lety

      We make our own documentaries too. That simple

    • @lageena8642
      @lageena8642 Před 2 lety +2

      I agree with you, race and class matters. The narrative changes so much for mothers of colour.

    • @Iluvmydogs128
      @Iluvmydogs128 Před rokem

      Asian working moms suffer too- more than the white moms. We are only considered as humans if we are high performers and once that falters due to motherhood they treat you like garbage- they don’t do this towards the white women

  • @jennyalphs5915
    @jennyalphs5915 Před 2 lety +5

    Haha feminist got what they wanted don't cry now you have to work harder then your husband if you haven't been brain washed to dump him to become independent. I stay home clean my home enjoy my life and take care of my two kids happily never wanted to be a working mom it sounds stupid.

    • @kilaa0007
      @kilaa0007 Před rokem +8

      wait until he start abusing you n leave you, we will see how you can support yourself

    • @suman3316
      @suman3316 Před rokem

      @@kilaa0007 not everyone is unfortunate and degenerate like you

    • @elizabethamana5901
      @elizabethamana5901 Před rokem +1

      You understand that some/most women don't have the option to not work, that's why there was the feminist and black feminist movement. White women where fighting to work while other races like black women just wanted to option to not work to death and raise other white women's kids. Your view is one dimensional and quite frankly ignorant. I'm glad you are happy being 100% dependent on your husband but I prefer to work part time so that In the worse case scenario (divorce) I will not be stuck with no work experience and scared out of my mind. I also love to show my daughter that Momma can hold her own if needed!

    • @user-my4lf4bx6v
      @user-my4lf4bx6v Před rokem

      Ok slave

    • @anonymous-yq4wc
      @anonymous-yq4wc Před rokem +3

      @@kilaa0007 why are you so biased? Her husband must be a very good man if she's happy. You're just jealous since no man loves you

  • @s.r.r7233
    @s.r.r7233 Před 2 lety

    And some of this husband's still cheat lol

  • @herculesh1907
    @herculesh1907 Před 2 lety +3

    Feminism coming to home near you.

  • @emir5009
    @emir5009 Před 3 lety +7

    Why are woman having kids. Just why

    • @kmtz1107
      @kmtz1107 Před 3 lety +12

      Really? Would you exist if it wasn’t for a woman. Think before you say something, no disrespect. At the end of the day it’s jus a natural order of life, is the men who fail us.

    • @yahnessayisrael6777
      @yahnessayisrael6777 Před 2 lety +9

      Ask your mom why.

    • @elizabethamana5901
      @elizabethamana5901 Před rokem +1

      I guess, so the human race can remain in existence.

  • @alexislane1035
    @alexislane1035 Před rokem +2

    All I hear is a bunch of whining. I hate whining. If you are specialized in your field then learn to negotiate for part time work and if they won't do it then look for a place that will or create your own part time work. Don't whine about why a company won't cater to you. Make sure you are invaluable and how you can be efficient with your time and stick to it. Stop playing the victim card. Also you can save up enough money on your own to be off work for 3 months for maternity leave

    • @Ehlaar
      @Ehlaar Před 6 měsíci

      Youve never worked anywhere. Imagine telling the employer what to do lol most of us dont work high profile jobs and can be replaced and fought with back and forth through the DOL.

  • @pdalaigh
    @pdalaigh Před rokem +1

    Oh bo-who, isn't this exactly what women wanted?